Leadership is about using the most effective strategies to conquer obstacles while taking consistent steps to move forward when tackling your vision; whether that vision is within the workplace, as a leader of a business or personal leadership.
Today on the Mindset Transformation radio show and podcast, we focus on Leadership; Keys to a successful mission driven life or business.
Success in life depends on what kind of a leader you are. You may say I am not a leader, I am not a manager or a CEO, true but self leadership is more important than how many people you lead in your home or place of work.
Here are 5 Essential Disciplines for Self Leadership to Lead a Mission Driven Life:
Discipline #1 Accountability
You must learn to take full responsibility for everything on your watch. This means that the fish stinks from the head down!
Discipline # 2 Focus
As a Leader, you will wear many hats. Success comes from knowing where to focus your attention. Everything is important.
Acquiring the skill of discrimination allows the leader to discern what is most important and least important.
Discipline # 3 Organization
Organization is the skill through which chaos is turned into order.
Discipline # 4 Innovation
As a leader you will begin to consciously focus your attention and discriminate where the maximum leverage is.
You will recognize the need for continual improvement and for innovation in your processes.
Discipline # 5 Communication
The skill of communication is evident in how well you communicate your passion, vision, mission to your employees, customers and self
This week on the Mindset Transformation radio and podcast, I interview Business coach, Daphne Lynn Valcin
Daphne’s talks to us about the keys to a successful mission driven life or business.
Since 90% of startup businesses fail, Daphne believes that the quality of life and business leadership is at the root of success or failure.
She believes that leadership is about using the most effective strategies to conquer obstacles while taking consistent steps to move forward when tackling your vision, whether that vision is within the workplace, as a leader of a business or personal leadership.
. Daphne explains what is true leadership.
. What sets successful startup businesses apart from those that fail.
. How a business coach helps clients.
. What does a thriving business look like.
. What are some of the biggest mistakes companies do with their sales and marketing efforts.
. What are some of the characteristics of successful leaders.
Here are 11 strategies for effective leadership from Young Entrepreneur Council:
When managing my team, I use a tactic from Dale Carnegie: Think in terms of the other person’s wants. The goal is to align a team member’s natural talents and preferences with the company’s goals. What do they want? What motivates them? What do they like to do? Then manage them to reinforce what they want and how they can achieve those things through their work.
This week on Mindset Transformation radio, Coach Myrna interviews coach Dan Willms, Positive Change MBA professor. Out topic today is “How to Program yourself for positive change.
Before I introduce coach Dan Willms, Here is my tip of the week.
From the book Switch: How to change things when change is hard
by Chip Heath and Dan Heath
Here are the facts:
Change is a process
1: Change is usually a situation problem, and not a personal problem.
2: For anything to change, someone must behave differently.
3: To change someone behavior, you must change someone’s situation.
4: For change to stick you must influence the person’s heart and mind.
Here is the story of Arthur that I found on line to illustrate the above points.
Arthur was an airborne paratrooper. Jumping out of airplanes killed his knees, his back, his legs. When he got out of the army he walked with a cane and couldn’t do anything so he gained a lot of weight. He could not support his weight, so he couldn’t do traditional exercise. His health rapidly declined. The doctor at the VA clinic told him to accept his faith, that he would never walk normal again.
One day while surfing the internet, he came across Diamond Dallas Page doing yoga. He said to himself, I could do this. So He bought the DVD! He figured he could use his arm to support his weight and get a cardio workout. Arthur was 297 lbs when he started doing yoga.
When he started his yoga exercises, he kept falling down and falling down, but he kept getting back up again and again!
Every day he got better and better in 10 months he had lost over 100 lbs and could not only walk without a cane but he could run!!
Change is usually situational. Arthur had a situational problem.
Arthur taught himself to do yoga because he decided to take control of his life. He got his heart and mind in the game and changed the situation!
Change is a process.
To lead a process requires persistence. Arthur kept getting back up and trying again to do his exercises.
When a change starts, it builds on itself.
The better Arthur got at yoga, the more he was motivated to keep going.
Small changes can snowball.
Change rarely works unless it is motivated by feeling. Arthur wanted to feel better about himself so he made the hard choices.
That’s my tip of the week from coach. How to change when change is hard.
There can be nothing harder than trying to loose 100 lbs when you can’t use your legs but Arthur found a way and so can you.
Our guest today is coach Dan Willms and he is a positive change guru. This is his space.
Dan Willms is a Life & Business Coach, an MBA Professor, a facilitator for The Leadership Challenge, a writer and an International Speaker – he is also the creator of the Positive Change Workshop and facilitates his workshops in Portuguese, English & Spanish. He has facilitated more than 118 Positive Change Workshops. He loves helping people and organizations to achieve their fullest potential. He is the co-author of the book Strategic Leadership (Liderança Estratégica) and the author of the upcoming book “Positive Change – One life @ a time”.
Dan is also my partner, we do a video blog on YouTube every week called “You asked for it” where we answer questions sent in from our social media network. Like us on Facebook to become part of our community. Myrna Young Lifecoach and Dan Willms.
Question 1. Tell us about your journey to becoming a Life coach and an ambassador for positive change.
Question 2: What is The Positive Change?
Question 3: Tell me about your happiness labs, how does it work?
Question 4: : What were your findings on these labs from your sample size of 400 people?
Question 5: So, based on your labs, what would you say is the secret to happiness?
Question 6: Why do you think is there so much unhappiness in the world?
This week on #Mindset Transformation with coach Myrna, I share an interview with Dr Denise Johnson, Spiritual Psychologist, on her radio program “Spiritual Principles for Emotional Healing.”
In this interview, I share my back story of how I became conscious and awakened,
(The title of my first book, Becoming Conscious, my Awakening), the situations and storms in my personal life that resulted in my spiritual growth and evolution, and finally my topic “Are you Eating your Seed, How to Reap where you Plant”
In this episode I also share how Tony Robins “Unleash the Power Within” seminar ushered me in the direction of my purpose.
You see I was on my way to becoming a house wife when I happened to attend one of Tony’s “Unleash the Power Within” seminars and left the experience totally fired up!
Two months later, I was the proud owner of my first stretch limousine and the CEO of “A Royal Livery Limousine Service”
Six years later, I was being honored with “Entrepreneur of the Year”
Here is Gerald Butler’s experience with the “Unleashing the Power within” seminar!
“Fear is a huge issue for me. This technique Tony has is a really smart way to literally set those fears aside… That to me, is unleashing the power within.” – Gerard Butler
As a distinguished actor, Gerard Butler, spends his life at the next level. Between his countless roles, Gerard is also a dedicated philanthropist. Introduced to Tony Robbins through his dad when he was 17, Gerard had listened to several audio programs before attending Unleash the Power. Despite living life in the public eye and being one for adventure, Gerard struggled with losing focus and being consumed in fear. Before attending Unleash the Power Within, he even found himself nervous about participating with 10,000 other people. Enraptured by the intense energy of the event, his nerves quickly disappeared and he found himself finally able to move towards overcoming his habit of fear.
In this episode, I explain the concepts of coaching.
Coaching is taking the client from where they are today to where they want to be tomorrow.
Life coaching is different from sports coaching.
If the client does not get the victory, you don’t fire the coach!
The life coach’s role is not to design the plays, but to Help the client discover the right plays!
As a spirituality coach, I help my clients understand who they are?
What beliefs have been holding them back from success?
What are the obstacles they have to overcome to achieve success in life?
What are some of the seeds you need to plant to achieve success?
Most of us are familiar with the seeds of tithing and giving.
The bible teaches that if you bring your tithe into the storehouse, God would multiply it 60, 100 times.
But the law of sowing and reaping go way beyond the physical.
My sales manager told me once to “To Reap where I plant”
That means that as a field sales agent, I am building relationships daily, I am planting seeds.
Similar to a real estate agent who farms a territory.
You don’t want to spend years building, sowing, and then leave before the harvest!
Sowing seeds are important in your job, in your marriage, in your friendships, with your children.
The bible teaches to love as you want to be loved, you must give first whatever you want to receive!
In your job, if you are faithful, working hard every day as unto the Lord, then your seeds will grow into the harvest of a promotion.
Just keep watering the seed through service and attention.
Why does God give you a seed?
As is taught in the parable by Jesus and the 3 servants entrusted with bags of silver by their master; God expects you to multiply whatever he gives to you.
He does not give you a talent or a gift for you to bury it or hoard it for yourself; no he gives it to you to benefit his kingdom.
Let me explain that using a physical example, the apple tree. Each apple has 5 seeds.
500 apple trees can produce an orchard of 30,000 apples. Proprietary growing and pruning methods developed by Tree Plantation, can double that again to over 100,000 apples per acre.
In a similar way, God gives you seeds so that you can scatter them and produce fruit!
He can blow your seeds where you did not even plant!
How to Make your Ground Fertile?.
To make your ground fertile, you have to hear the word, and do the word.
You can’t reap a harvest without first tilling the soil, you have to make the soil ready to receive the nutrients to grow the plants.
One way to do this is to find your burning bush!
What did God put inside of you that he wants you to bring to fruition?
How to Equate the Laws of the Harvest to the Laws of the Universe?
Whatever you sow you shall reap!
You reap in proportion to what you sow, so sow generously.
Remember the oak tree lives in the acorn! Small things do grow into big things.
Keep hitting the anvil, do something small every day to water the seed you have in the ground.
What is the Eating Your Seed Concept?
You have to save some of your earnings in order to plant it.
If you consume it all, you will have nothing to plant and you will always be without.
That is why your financial planner advises you to save 10% of your income to invest and get a return.
The bible teaches us that if you give, it will be given to you, A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over.
But it starts with giving.
Give whatever you want to receive, plant whatever you want to sow!
In closing, this is your season, this is the right time, start planting your seeds, keep watering them every day and watch God turn your apple into an orchard!
This week on #Mindset Transformation radio with coach Myrna, we give insights on 6 Ways to Find Your Purpose. Coach Dan Willms and I also interview Keshia Marie Morris, Political Activist, as she shares how she found her purpose.
Purpose: If you don’t have one, you will perish! The bible teaches that people without a vision shall perish.
That is the same statement that God made to Adam and Eve in the garden of Eden. He told them that if they ate from the tree of knowledge, then they will surely die. And they did!
Not a physical death; but a spiritual death. In a similar way the bible teaches that people without a vision shall perish, again not a physical death, but in spirit
You see, having a purpose inspires you to live and not die!
I love this quote from the great Dr. Wayne Dyer
“Purpose inspires you. When you are inspired by some great purpose, some extraordinary project; all your thoughts break their bonds, your mind transcends limitations, your consciousness expands in every direction, and you find yourself in a new and wonderful world!”
Dr. Wayne Dyer
That is what happened to my daughter Keshia Marie Morris. She became inspired after reading Nelson Mandela’s book “A Long Walk to Freedom”
My partner coach Dan Willms and I interviewed Keshia on our show “You Asked for it”
Listen to the MP3 recording to hear Keshia’s story.
Here is a poem Keshia wrote and I published in my book “Out of the Snares, a story of hope and encouragement” in my chapter on Purpose and Destiny.
Purpose is continually evolving
When you emit God from your purpose,
You close doors that God clearly opened
Know that God is behind your purpose
Take ownership of your purpose, for it is not yours, but the Lords
Purpose requires you to be diligent
Rebuke laziness in the name of God
Have tunnel vision in regards to your purpose
Focus on your purpose
Walk in your purpose
Stand in your purpose
Don’t forget your purpose
Neglect those things that hinder your purpose
Don’t get caught up in daily living and,
Forget what God has purposed
You will never be perfect, only the God,
Who called you to your purpose is perfect!
Purpose makes you leave what is comfortable
Purpose will help you endure what is uncomfortable
Just because you miss a short-term goal,
It does not take you away from your purpose
The end of your purpose is always bigger than you
Purpose will always require some suffering!
Your purpose may have many fingers or parts
Beware of wolves in sheep’s clothing,
Who will try to pull you away from your purpose
When you are weak, call on the Lord
Who is with you at ALL Times!
Through him all things are possible!!!
Keshia Marie Morris
6 Ways to Find Your Purpose
1. Look inside at your natural ability. You were created with a purpose. There is something you can do better than anyone else on the planet. Seek and you will find it.
2. Pay attention to the things you like doing. The thing you would do for free. Ask yourself what would I do today if money was not a problem?
3. Find your passion. Do you want to help starving children in Africa? Do you want to stop domestic violence? Do you want to take big money out of politics? What injustice makes you mad? Don’t just talk about it, do something about it.
4. Keep learning and growing. Grow consciously. Read books. Attend seminars, hire a coach or a mentor
5. Pray. Keep an open connection to God, so you are able to hear him through the Holy Spirit. Ask him what he wants you to do, and he will answer.
6. Reflection. Do you know what you are good at? Are you aware of your strengths? Find a quiet place every day and meditate. It is the only way to connect to source and find out who you truly are.
Today on the Mindset Transformation radio show and podcast with Coach Myrna, I interview Life Coach Kim McDaniel.
Kim is going to teach us How to Detox the Body and Soul for Internal and External Success. Kim is the author of the book “Come out with your hands Up – The Joy of Surrendering on God’s terms”
Why detoxing is important:
Building sky scrapers on weak foundations can be detrimental. In the same manner, piling on outer successes without addressing the internal structure, can look great from the outside, but cracks in the foundation will have one of two outcomes – explosion or implosion. Regularly detoxing the body and soul helps to ensure the integrity of the structure – our structure – and it must be intentional.
Coach Myrna tip of the week is:
The function of the soul is to indicate it’s desire.
The function of the mind is to choose from it’s alternatives.
The function of the body is to act out that choice.
The soul speaks to you in feelings. Feelings are the language
of the soul.
There comes a time in the evolution of every soul when the chief concern is no longer the survival of the physical body, but the growth of the spirit. No longer the attainment of worldly success, but the realization of self.
Upon death, the body and mind are not dropped. The body changes form, leaving it’s most dense part behind, but retaining it’s outer shell, joining with the spirit as one energy mass of 3 dimensions.
Listen to hear Coach Kim answer the following questions:
What is the concept of detoxification – why is it relevant?
How frequently should one do a detox for the body?
Are you suggesting vegetarianism or veganism as the only way to be healthy?
What is alkalinity – does it relate to things beyond diet?
Detoxing the “soul” – what exactly does that refer to?
What about between detoxes – what do ongoing behaviors look like?
Is there really a science to detoxing the brain?
What is the relevance of building fences – I thought success looks like building bridges.
Tell me a little about your Get in S.H.A.P.E. program.
S – Stress and Sleep
H – Hydration
A – Alkaline
E – Energy and Exercise
There is another way to Detox the body and the Soul!
Take that much needed break from your hectic city life and explore the soul-cleansing North-East.
Tired of your busy life? Tired of cliché destinations to escape it? Dawki welcomes you with its refreshingly serene ambience. The cool breeze will help you get rid of all your stress and soak in the quaint atmosphere.
Jeet Roy implores you to visit Dawki: “Go on a drive to Dawki on the Bangladesh border, travelling over the Jowai-Amlaren-Dawki road. The journey itself would be the destination – you would pass the waterfalls and stone bridge at Thlumuwi, the Pitcher Plant park at Jarain, numerous other streams, rivulets, and falls, till you finally break through the woods and hills over the picturesque Sylhet food-plains at Dawki.”
Nothing is impossible, If you believe. How to turn life’s challenges into opportunities of self-discovery and personal success.
Todays’ guest on the Mindset Transformation Radio show and podcast with Coach Myrna, is Dr. Sheila D. Williams. Dr Williams is the author of “My Mother’s Keeper”
In keeping with the theme of my show here is my tip of the week. Always finish the race, don’t be a quitter. Come all the way through!
Don’t stop in the middle, don’t turn back!
Just finish the race.
Look at life like a long distance swim trip.
When you start out you have no idea what you are going to meet up with.
You can’t predict the weather, the waves, or any other hazards and obstacles on your journey.
You have to make up in your mind, that you will “Come all the way through,” That if you are able, you will finish the race.
If you get to the middle of the ocean and you run into a thunder storm for instance, you just can’t stop.
Going back is just as perilous as going forward. You have to “come all the way through”
That is exactly how life is, you can’t predict the storms, you can’t predict the challenges that you are going come up against.
You know that they will come. You have to decide up front to “come all the way through.”
You have to know for sure that Nothing is Impossible, if you believe.
God planted that goal or dream in you for a reason. You have something to give to mankind.
If you believe, you will achieve!
You just have to keep moving forward, going back is death to your dreams, it should not be an option!
Today’s show discusses mental illness and how Dr. Williams cared for her mother as she suffered through clinical depression.
Her purpose for writing this book is to shed light on this taboo topic and offer healing to her readers who may be going through something similar.
She decide to be very transparent on her mothers clinical depression and how she cared for her mother from the young age of 10.
Nothing is impossible, if you believe. Listen to hear how Dr Sheila overcame her childhood story and succeed as a Mental Health Therapist/Counselor, a behavior Analyst, Published Author, Life Coach and Educational Director. She tells how she worked sometimes 4 jobs while caring for her terminally ill mother and still was able to earn her PH.D.
Today on the Mindset Transformation Radio show, Coach Myrna interviews Dr Nina Savelle-Rocklin. Dr Nina will teach us “It’s not about willpower, how to lose weight without dieting” Dr Nina is the author of “Food for Thought” a book about the treatment of eating disorders.
Our emotions feed our food intake. Our brain responds to emotions and feelings. Dr Nina is going to teach us today about how emotions affect our eating.
In keeping with the format of my show, today my tip of the week looks at how positive emotions and negative emotions affect our daily lives.
Positive emotions or feelings can be likened to yeast in a loaf of bread. They raise your energy levels so that you can attract like thoughts floating around in the universe.
Thought impulses mixed with emotion are picked up quicker by infinite intelligence and acted upon.
There are 7 major positive emotions:
These are the most powerful emotions for creating wealth and happiness.
There are also 7 major negative emotions
Positive and negative emotions cannot occupy the mind at the same time. One or the other must dominate. You must make sure that positive emotions constitute the dominant emotions of your mind.
Form the habit of scanning your body to determine how you are feeling. If you find negativity immediately shift to a positive thought. With practice your positive emotions will dominate and negatives cannot enter in.
Negative emotions and feelings make you feel bad. Feeling bad is unnatural so we try to eat something, drink something, buy something or do something to make ourselves feel better. That is the source of addictive behaviors. You need to kill the ANTS. Automatic negative thoughts.
Check out my blog at blog.myhelps.us for more information on how to control your Automatic negative thoughts.
Nina Savelle-Rocklin, Psy.D. is a psychoanalyst, author, speaker and internationally-recognized expert in weight, food and body image issues.
She has been featured in the Los Angeles Times, Prevention, Real Simple, Huffington Post and many other publications, and is a frequent guest speaker on podcasts, radio, summits and other events, including the prestigious National Meeting of the American Psychoanalytic Association.
Dr. Nina’s personal experience gives her a unique understanding of what it’s like to struggle – and she knows change is possible! She brings a fresh perspective by helping people understand “why” they turn to food instead of focusing on what they’re eating. In addition to her private practice, she writes an award-winning blog, Make Peace With Food, hosts a popular podcast, Win The Diet War with Dr. Nina, and offers “food for thought” on her video series, The Dr. Nina Show.
She has contributed to two psychoanalytic books, and her book “Food For Thought” on the treatment of eating disorders is to be published by Rowman & Littlefield later this year. Check out Dr Nina on the web at http://winthedietwar.com
Can you share your history and what led you to do this work?
• Topic Discussion: It’s Not About Willpower! How To Lose Weight Without Dieting
• 2. Every year there’s a new fad diet – low carb, gluten free, Paleo. Why do you think diets don’t work?
• 3. What’s the best way to deal with food triggers?
• 4. What role does self-acceptance and self-esteem play in weight loss?
• 5. For our listeners who want to make changes, what are some of the things they can do to create change?
• 6. A lot of people lose weight but gain it back, or they’re always in that yo-yo diet cycle. What causes people to sabotage their weight loss efforts?
Welcome to Mindset Transformations Radio Show and Podcast with Coach Myrna. I am your most gracious host. Out topic today is “How to Win at the Game of Life”.
Today I am going to teach on How to be a Winner!!
Most of us were glued to the television last week to see the athletes try to win Gold at the Rio Olympics.
Each and every one of them came to win Gold!
Did you see the interview with Shakur Stevenson? This interview and the race where the Bahamian girl threw herself across the finish line to take the gold from Alison Felix were my most inspiring moments of the Olympics. In the interview with Shakur the NBC reporter asked him how he felt about winning a silver medal? The interview was going good until this question and then Shakur decided not to fake it anymore. He broke down crying saying
“I hate to loose, I wanted to win. The Silver medal is terrible.”
This is our first lesson on “Winning at the Game of Life.”
Never Settle for Second Best!
In our Podcast today we are going to look::
* How to Be a Winner
* How to Think like a Winner
* How to Act like a Winner
We are going to look at winners like Russel Wilson of the Seattle Seahawks.
We are going to look at Mike Tyson and Buster Douglas.
We are going to look at Steve Jobs.
Inspiration story and tip of the week.
Winning at the Game of Life some examples.
Acceleration – How God and a Coach can “Accelerate” You
To become a winner you need to be self motivated and need the help of a Mentor Coach.
Someone to push you when you lack motivation, someone to keep you accountable, someone to help you with the game plan.
The enemy keeps you busy with trivial pursuits to keep you from achieving your goals and purpose.
Here are 3 Principles to Winning at the Game of Life:
1> Physiologically – Is your body in a peak state? Are you prepared physically?
2> Psychologically – Do you have the mental capacity to win? Do you believe you can?
3> Soulfully – Do you believe it is your purpose? Have you tapped into the wisdom of your soul?
For the next 30 days, I will give FREE copies of my book “Out of the Snares, a story of hope and encouragement” Just pay for shipping
“Out of the Snares, a story of hope and encouragement” is jammed packed with stories of my victories and how
“I won at the game of Life.”
*From Escaping Poverty and child abuse in my native country,
*to winning as a business person as the top female Limousine operator in Toronto, Canada,
*to winning my USA citizenship,
*to winning twin girls by adoption,
*to winning in Love and relationships!!
Lots and Lots of victories!!.
So download your copy now by clicking the Amazon link below:
A mindset shift or transformation is necessary if your belief system is not producing the results you are expecting in life. As a Life and Transformations Coach, I wanted to share some mindset transformations about relationships that may get you better results. Leave a comment if you agree or disagree!
1. What is the right reason to enter into a long term relationship?
Most of us (including me before I was enlightened) feel that we should enter into a long term commitment because we “fell” in love.
Others may enter into a long term relationship like marriage because they want children; they want security or even to stem loneliness. But, according to Neale Donald Walsch from the “Conversations with God” series, we should put a little more thought into choosing a long term partner than feelings.
We should enter into a long term partnership for a mutually beneficial purpose.
I was watching an very old episode of Oprah a few weeks ago and she was interviewing the Smith’s. I was so impressed with Will Smith and Jada Pinketh Smith’s philosophy on marriage and family. They had a mutually beneficial purpose for their relationship and it continues today. They have family meetings every week to keep the purpose of the marriage and family in front of them.
Their purpose for getting together was to enhance the lives of others and they do that by always choosing work that inspires others.
And even though we have heard many rumors of the marriage failing, it is still standing because their purpose for it is greater than the two of them.
So when two people enter in a long term relationship they have to figure out the Why? What is the mutually beneficial purpose?
-Are they wanting to bring up children for a purpose?
Like Will and Jada Smith
-Are they wanting to enhance Gods kingdom?
Like Joel and Victoria Osteen
-Are they going to change the world through leadership?
Like Barack and Michelle Obama?
If the purpose is strong it will be like a house built on the rocks, it will withstand the storms
2. Why do relationships fail?
Statistics show that relationships fail because of failed expectations.
Most relationships start out with each party having predefined expectations about what they want out of the relationship and what they want from the other person.
Contrary to popular opinion another person cannot complete you, you must complete yourself.
The bible teaches that it is not if another person will disappoint, but when.
So when you enter into a relationship, and its survival is based on what the other person does, says, etc. You will always be disappointed.
The mindset shift is to become the best you, to make sure you are living up to your ideal self because we can never change another person, we can only change ourselves.
For example, there is conflict over a wife’s expectation that her husband takes her out on romantic dinners once per month. She is waiting on him to make the offer and he doesn’t, instead he goes out with his friends and leaves her at home with the kids. She has several options:
Sulking, picking a fight, going out with her girlfriends – none of which heals the relationship – or she can Give That Which She Wants.
She can take him to dinner, she can cook a romantic dinner and send the kids to the babysitter. She can respond with love.
Anything you want, you first have to give.
3. Become self-centered.
I know this is going to shock some, because we were all brought up to believe that being selfish and self-centered is bad; but not according to the bible!
The bible teaches that we must love others as we love ourselves.
Our first relationship must be with self.
We must learn to honor and cherish self and love ourselves before we can love another.
We can never truly fall in love with another, until we have truly fallen in love with ourselves.
I know women are always sacrificing self for others, they think it makes for a good relationship; but it has the opposite effect.
They get burnt out and then resentment sets in. Then they start to resent their spouse for doing nothing. They cultivated that attitude.
The old saying that you have to train people how to treat you is truth. You start off doing all the work in the home, looking after the kids, doing all the cooking, while your spouse drinks beer and watch TV, then 5 years later when you are burnt out. You shouldn’t blame your spouse!
You should be self centered and make time in the day for your self.
Get up and go to the gym, walk, pray or meditate.
Make time in the evening to reflect, learn something, relax!
Everyone around you will benefit.
4. What should love do when we suffer hurt and disappointment from our loved ones?
We will all have hurt and disappointments in our lives.
In fact there is an old saying that says:
You are either going through something, coming out of something or about to go through something!
It is time for us to adopt a different response to our challenges and disappointments.
As humans we react with pain and hurt to what another is being, saying or doing.
The first thing we should do is to become conscious and aware of the feelings we are having.
Don’t run from the pain, don’t mask it with drugs or alcohol. Feel it, acknowledge it.
Try to find yourself in it.
Be honest with your feelings.
It is very important to not react with vengeance or rage, and to understand your true feelings.
Once you feel it and acknowledge it, it’s power over you diminishes and you can get to the place of this of “This too shall pass”.
After that you can then reach for your highest self and look for the lessons.
A master knows that all experiences comes to teach and is for self-growth.
5. Should you forgive or look past behaviors of your spouse or significant others because that is the Christian thing to do?
As Christians we are taught to forgive, if we want to forgiveness.
To not judge before we take the plank out of our own eyes.
So it would seem that the Christian thing to do is to forgive our spouses for his/her sins.
But in the book “Conversations with God” by Neale Donald Walsh
The author teaches that you should always do what’s best for us. Remember we are self-centered.
Your girl friends are always going to encourage you to leave your husband because he is a cheater.
Walsch says that you should leave your spouse only if it is best action for you or your children.
You leave when the marriage no longer fulfills its purpose.
Let’s look at Hilary Clinton. I believe she married Bill Clinton with a purpose. He has always been a cheater but she saw his potential as a future President; So she proposed to him and chose to overlook his infidelity. She chose self!
Today her daughter is living a purpose driven life, She was First Lady of the Unites States of America and could become the first female President of the United States of America. You have never heard of her infidelity even though we have heard all about her husband’s.
We should all follow her lead and leave our cheating spouses to God, we should concern ourselves only with self. Being the best we can be and we will get our crown here on earth as well as our heavenly crown in the next life.
On her Mindset Transformations Radio show, Coach Myrna Young interviews Neuro Linguistic Programming (NLP) Coach Van Henry. Van tells our audience why he became an NLP coach. He was on assignment as an engineer in South Africa during the Apartheid regime, when he had a conversation with a Black man who told him that he was told at a young age that he was unteachable because he had a smaller brain than the white man. Van of course told him that was a lie, that he himself was an educated black man with an engineering degree. He convinced this man that his brain was the same size as the White man, the Chinese man and all other races because God created us all equal!
This man was convinced because he was looking at the evidence, Van Henry himself. He then reprogrammed his brain to believe that he could be educated and went on to have a college degree and to become a supervisor, leading a fulfilling life. So as a Transformations Coach, I would like to do the same for you. The lie that you tell yourself can be anything. It does not have to be that you are not as smart as another; but you could believe that you are limited by any other belief that is holding you in bondage.
Neuro Linguistic Programming is the art of training the brain to achieve a goal, any goal.
The first thing you have to do is to Master Self. Master your self talk. Master your beliefs.
Then you have to write your goals down and give them form. Once you give them form, you have to tell someone who can hold you accountable.
This does two things. Firstly, once you speak your goals into the atmosphere you activate the Laws of Attraction and secondly it motivates you to not look like a failure to the person holding you accountable.
The third thing is to access your values to be sure there is no conflict with your beliefs. This is where awareness comes in. You have to know who you are.
You have to know Yourself, to Grow Yourself
Listen to this Youtube video and hear directly from NLP coach Van Henry on How to Program your subconscious mind for permanent change.
Once you believe, then you build on that belief.
You become a master builder, as your coach I will give you the tools to help you build.
If you are a coach or an author and you would like to be a guest on the “Mindset Transformation Talk Radio Show” email me at firstname.lastname@example.org
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