How to Flow with Desire

How to Flow with Desire

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How to Flow with Desire: Welcome to the Transform your Mind Radio show and podcast my name is Myrna Young Certified Professional Coach, Author and your Host, each week I bring you an inspiring guest or a solo coaching message to Help you Live your Best Lives Now by Transforming your Mindset.
Thanks for tuning in today and I hope that this segment meets you at your point of need.

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01:05
Today we are concluding our series on the Alchemy of Desire with a solo
coaching session, today it’s just gonna be you in me. I will be sharing
with you an excerpt from one of my previous interviews; but for the most
part it’s going to be you and me because I wanted this to be a coaching session on now that you have gotten what you desired. How to Flow with Desire.

In our previous five episodes of teaching you how to use the fantastic
and magical transformation of the word Alchemy to get your most desired thing. Whether it’s a relationship, whether it’s a job whether it’s Travel, whatever is your most intimate desire we’ve been teaching you, me and my co-host miss Margo Blake has been teaching you how to achieve the Alchemy of Desire which is the magical transformation of thoughts into manifestation.

02:39 Today I want to conclude with now that you’ve got it how
to flow with it so we’re calling this episode “How to Flow with your Desire”

Abraham Hicks: How to Flow with Desire
02:52
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05:36
Let me recap our five previous episodes this is episode number six .
In our first episode we talked about “ How to Manifest the Desires of your heart and the first
step was knowing what you want, and once you know what you want in order t activate it you need to put some emotion to it and that is how you activate the Law of Attraction.

06:15 In our second episode, we talked about “How to use the Energy of Desire to create something magical.

06:23 In our third episode we talked “How to put Attention on your Desire so that you can light your desires a fire!

06:37 In our 4th episode we talked about “How Infidelity Affects Intimacy” and our desire for our partners.

06:51 In our last episode we talked about “How to Prevent the EBB in long term relationships because you know hat there’s always Ebb and Flow; but we want it to flow.


07:19 If you missed any of these episodes please download them
on iTunes, Stitcher, Tune in or Google Play podcast players, and please remember to subscribe so that you wouldn’t miss any more.

07:40
All right so let’s get on with the show! Let’s dive right in as I
mentioned before our topic today is going to be “How to Flow with your Desire”
Another way of saying that is

“How to keep what you now have”

07:58 What you have in your hands need some work, you just don’t
get it and then you don’t have to do anything else.
Relationships require work, and most people have a false sense of entitlement.
They feel that it is enough that they are just there in the relationship and
all they have to do is show up or come home every night and they feel that
they’re doing something. People think that you should love them as they are
and they don’t need any work or they don’t need to make any changes.

08:37 I remember one of my ex-husband’s actually saying this to me.
A few months after we were married I asked him to take more care with his
Appearance and hygiene because he was walking around looking like he was homeless and this was his response and I quote “This is what you bought and you can’t send it back” A lot of people feel that hey you picked me, you bought me, you got into a relationship with me, so you must be okay with how I am, and you know you gotta put up or shut up. But that does not lead to a healthy relationship.

09:22 Some ask why do I have to do all this work? I have heard people say it’s either a fit or it’s or it’s not. Why try to force a square peg in a round hole? Good question. It’s true, that there are some square pegs that definitely do not need to be forced into a round hole because it’s never gonna fit right; but we’re not talking about the obvious misfits. We’re talking about couples have some synergy. They have love but they just got to do a little bit of work.

10:09 We all know the spouse or a partner that just comes home and turn on the TV and pay his partner no attention. Those are the ones were talking about. Relationship needs work to keep them fresh and healthy.

10:28 When relationships are not fresh and healthy, couples then become roommates and it’s never more evident as when you go to your partner and you say “Hey this is not working out, I think we should we should go our separate ways and they say sure why not. They agree! My gosh that is like a slap in your face or like someone throwing a cold bucket of water on you! That is not the response you want but; that’s what happens when the relationship Ebbs and Ebbs and nobody pays any attention and you’re now just roommates. What has happened is that your partner has emotionally checked out a long time ago and they’re just there for I don’t know, finances, the children or whatever the reason.

11:20 When you break up with someone you want them
to miss you. You want them to chase you. You don’t want them to say.
“Sure, why not!”. That’s not the response that we should get when
we’re trying to terminate a relationship right?

11:48 I remember reading Gabrielle Union’s book we’re going to need more wine and she told the story a very sad story about the night she had a fight with her first husband. She describes this relationship as feeling like you are driving towards a brick wall yet being incapable of mashing on the breaks! Her marriage was going down the tank for a long time but she didn’t want to give up on it. So, she told the story about a night she had a fight with her husband one of their many fights and she ran out the house in the middle of the night, four o’clock in the morning or some ridiculous time like that. She expected her husband to chase her because you know your husband should be worried about you, he’s supposed to be to protect you!
Gabriel ended up sitting by a tree and falling asleep. When she woke up in the morning she was sure that her husband was worried about her and called the cops. She expected to find cops all over her house when she got home. Instead she found her husband fast asleep.
That’s when she realized there was no hope for her marriage.

13:44 So ladies and gentlemen, Ask yourself what do you bring to the table?
You now have the object of your affection, you won. He or she is now yours what are you going to do to keep him or her?
Ladies maybe you were a seductress and got the man interested, now what? What else you got?
One quality will bring someone to the table and even make them fall in love with you but it will not keep them. It will not hold them.
Lots of people love others but can’t live with them.
Lot of couples divorce yet are still in love, that is because you need a pairing of attractive qualities.
A one hat trick is not going to be enough in the long run.
Ladies, You know that there is a long line of seductress waiting around the corner to entice your man.
Men if all you got, is that you are the provider, well all your woman has to do is look to the left or right and find another man with a job and he can replace you.
What is your unique paring?
This information was the reason I went through 4 husbands.
They all had one thing but not the unique pairing I required to hold me.
I will tell you it took me almost 30 years to find it in my current relationship.
My unique paring was ambition and genuine caring. Caring for me and my daughter.
When you get this unique paring you get not only an attraction but you get an addiction.
The “and” is what makes you difficult to replace.
What I would like to do now is play for you an except from one of the relationship experts I interviewed on this show to add some context to our conversation. Ms Inez Bracy is a coach and author of Rejuvenate your life: 21 days to feel like a woman again.

The Alchemy of Desire

18:25 21 Days to feel like a woman again by Inez Bracy

1. Meditation
Your journey begins whenever you say it is.
Now is this moment if you decide this second yeah this makes perfect sense to me. I am going to do something to start changing my life.
If you decide that that’s perfect and you go into silence and into meditation, being still, whatever it is you desire to change will
reveal itself to you. It will come in a way where you are given steps to take.
Now I can tell you this when that comes, it is going to come very quietly, it’s not going to be loud and boisterous, it’s going to tell you perhaps you should do this or that.

2. Celebration
21:14 The next thing that I enjoy is celebrations. Celebrate something every single day and that’s
what my blissful living challenge is all about. So many times we can get caught up in everything that’s going on around us. Almost like a vortex we get just sucked into it; but if you’ve ever been around a baby, small babies or under two years old. Up to that age the baby’s just gurgles and giggles and they are just so happy.
I imagine it now.

21:54 They’re blissful. They have no reason not to be. We lose that along the way from boundaries and everything else that comes along. When we lose that we get to recapture and reclaim it because it is our birthright. Babies come in the world with it. We could to reclaim our birthright and no matter what is going on in our environment, we can still choose bliss.

3. 23:05 Vibration Frequency
The more you start to celebrate, the more you lift your vibrations and The more you sing, the more you dance, the less often you will have to shovel;because your vibrational energy is at a point now where it’s attracting to you those things that are good. This level of vibration is higher so you’re going to be attracting love, you’re going to be attracting Joy, you’re going to be attracting bliss.

23:33 Myrna: Yes, I talk about gratitude like that but; I guess it’s the same word be grateful for what you have regardless of what’s lacking. Don’t concentrate on what you don’t have. Concentrate on what you want. So that you can raise your vibrational frequency and attract good things.

25:09 So, yes celebrating having gratitude very important.

4. 25:17 Vision
Another thing is to visualize. To live in a space of visualization to write out what it is you want. When I’m working with my clients, I say to them I desire you get to write out your vision for your life. Where do you want to live?
How does it look? How does it show up?

25:56 Sit down and see yourself in the theater of your mind. On your own stage and you’re the actor and the producer!
Write out your vision for your life.

5. 32:18 Woulda, Shoulda, Coulda
We can spend our entire lives lamenting Woulda, Shoulda, Coulda and that’s all in the past. All in the past, it’s already happened or didn’t happen. Those words have no value to this present moment. They have no value to your future either.
So you should begin to eliminate woulda coulda shoulda from your vocabulary

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The Alchemy of Desire Episode 3- The Power of Attention

The Alchemy of Desire

The Alchemy of Desire is the magical process of the transformation of your desires to reality. This transformation happens faster if we empower it with Attention. In this episode we are going to teach you how to use the, Power of Attention, to manifest all your dreams and desires.

What is Desire – Desire can be called the feminine face of God! I love this sentence! Desire is what God places in your spirit to lead you to your purpose. It is the key that unlocks what God placed you on this earth to do.
We Desire for our partners physically and spiritually, we desire our careers, we desire to procreate and have children, we desire to be emotionally and physically healthy, we desire to be wealthy but most of all we desire to fulfill our purpose on this earth and leave it a better place then we found it.

In our first blog on this topic, we talked about how to manifest the Desires of your Heart. The first step is knowing what you want. The second step is adding emotions to it.

In our second blog post on the Alchemy of Desire, we talked on how to use the, Energy of Desire, to create something magical. If you missed those 2 episodes, please listen to then my iTunes podcast.

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Today we want to turn up the heat and talk about the “Power of Attention”
• Now that we know what we want.
• We know how to use the energy of emotion to engage the laws of attraction.
• Now, we want to light our desire afire with the “Power of Attention.”

You remember as a kid you would hold a magnet over a piece of paper and have the Attention of the sun light the paper afire, that is what the, Power of Attention, can do to your Desires.

So, lets dive right in.
My co-host on this episode Margo Blake, an Intimacy coach with One Taste.

Tune in to Sticher to listen to Margo tell her personal story of using, The Power of Attention, after her divorce to attract her now soulmate.

The word desire does not only belong with, sexual desires. As a Mindset Coach, today I want to show you how the energy or, Power of Attention, can transform your Desires into something magical as promised by the Alchemy of Desire.

The power of Attention
Attention is your power source. Rarely does a quality life just show up by chance. What you give your attention to expands.
If you want your dream to come through, you have to do more than dream. You must focus your attention and activate the power of Attention.
The power source for having an Intention that comes through is Attention. What you pay Attention to will grow.

If your intention comes from the level of your true self, it can attract anything. Attention activates the energy of Attraction.
Every wish or desire is like a tiny seed that contains the blueprint for the tree that manifests from the seed. The seed of Desire which is also the seed of any Intention needs nourishment to grow.

If you want your desire to manifest here are some important ways to put the right attention on it:

1. Have a clear intention or goal; don’t muddy it with doubt and fear regarding why it won’t come true.

2. Have positive emotions around your desire, feel how good it will be to fulfill it.

3. Believe that what you want is beneficial to you without any negative consequences to those around you.

4. Be prepared for any response the Universe brings and be flexible to where you go from there.

5. Feel confident that hidden sources will come to your aide once your desires are released to the universe.

6. Find time to meditate on your desires. At the level of the soul, the energy of attraction is most powerful.

One True Love

Margo, how can someone use the Power of Attention to change someone’s feelings about them?

I have known lot of men who are able to woo women by paying them attention. I have been on the receiving end of attention that changed my feelings for a partner a few times in my life. My Pastor once said that women are responders, I agree.

Tune in to Google Play to listen to Margo’s answer to this question.

In our last 2 episodes we talked about 4 of the ways renowned sexologist Jaiya believes that we are wired. We discussed the Energetic, the Sensual, the Sexual and the Kinky. Jaiya is the author of Red Hot Touch? Today I though we could look at the Shape Shifter who can be all those energies.

Here are the 5 Sexual Blueprints.

6. Energetic: Turned on by space, tease and anticipation.
7. Sensual: Turned on by comfort, relaxation and all the senses ignited.
8. Sexual: Turned on by nudity and flat out sexual intercourse.
9. Kinky: Turned on by the taboo and power play.
10. Shapeshifter: Turned on by all of the above.

So, Margo, since today we are looking at The Power of Attention, how can a woman who is a Shape Shifter use the Power of Attention to create something magical in the bedroom?

This episode of the Mindset Transformation radio show and podcast is being brought to you by Hypnosis Everywhere and M-I-X- A-M-O-R-E.

Today we talked about, The Power of Attention, and to use this energy to create transformation in your lives.

I want to leave you with this thought. When all three legs of the tripod are in place – Focused Attention, Flexible consciousness and pure awareness; the path is open. You become the conscious master, the Energy of Attraction, is activated.

There are certain things that hinder the manifestation of Desire. Severe obstacles such as depression, anxiety, low self-esteem, substance abuse and toxic relationships block the manifestation of your desires. It gets tangled up in personal problems.
So be sure to meditate on your desires and rid yourself of toxicity either from substance abuse or toxic relationships.

If you found this episode inspirational or you learned anything, Please subscribe to my Itunes podcast and rate and review this Episode, so we can be encouraged to bring you more episodes every week.

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Namaste

How to Fly like an Eagle above the Storms of Life

How to Use the Winds of the Storm to Elevate your Life

Did you suffer from Childhood sexual abuse or sexual harassment as an adult? Today on Mindset Transformation radio and podcast, I share my journey from being sexually abused as a child and how I used that experience to elevate my life. I teach how you too can use the winds from the storms of life to elevate your life to greater heights.

In this episode, we will study the Eagle and how the Eagle looks forward to the storm because the eagle knows that only by using the winds of the storm can she elevate to greater heights. Without the storm, she can never fly above the clouds. Familiarly, in life we need challenges, hurts and disappointments to get us out of our comfort zones and stretch us. Without the storms of life we would become complacent.

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Here are some characteristics of the Eagle:

Eagles fly’s above the storms

The crow that picks and picks at the ground, can’t rise to the heights of the eagle or is not conditioned to rise about the ground. It’s mindset is to stay on the ground and peck for food.

The Eagle does not escape the storm. It simply uses the storm to lift it higher. It rises on the winds that bring the storm.

When the storms of life come upon us — and all of us will experience them — we can rise above them by setting our minds and our belief toward God or we can be like the crow and peck and peck on the ground.

The storms do not have to overcome us. We can allow God’s power to lift us above them. God enables us to ride the winds of the storm that bring sickness, tragedy, failure and disappointment in our lives. We can soar above the storm.

We can learn how to do this from the Eagle.

1. Eagles fly alone at high altitude and not with sparrows or with other small birds. No other bird can go to the height of the Eagle.
2. Eagles have strong vision. They have the ability to focus on something up to five kilometers away. When an Eagle sites his prey, he narrows his focus on it and sets out to get it. No matter the obstacle, the Eagle will not move his focus from the prey until he grabs it.
3. Eagles love the storm. When clouds gather, the Eagle get excited. The Eagle uses the storm’s winds to lift it higher. Once it finds the wind of the storm, the Eagle uses the raging storm to lift him above the clouds. This gives the Eagle an opportunity to glide and rest its wings. In the meantime, all the other birds hide in the leaves and branches of the trees. We can use the storms of life to rise to greater heights. Achievers relish challenges and use them profitably.

I meditated on the reason for the hurricanes that caused so much destruction to homes and property in the Caribbean islands, Houston, TX and Florida. I believe that God does not make mistakes that everything in the Universe has a purpose. So, I asked myself what is the purpose of Hurricanes?

My initial response from the Universe was that storms are created with the purpose to blow down the old and make room for the new because everything is recycled on this earth. But I felt there was more so that is why I decided to study the Eagle. As mentioned before. The Eagle uses the storm to elevate him higher. He can’t fly to great heights without the winds of the storm.

What if God created the storm to do the same for his people?
The storm does not only blow down old trees, it blows down old houses as well, it blows down old power posts and power lines. So, in actuality we should be like the eagle and anxiously await the storm to see what old thing will be renewed.

It works for old relationships as well. There is something immensely intimate about riding out the storm with your loved one. Just you and your close family members. All the attention is on each other. No television, no lights just the personal connection and candle light!

I have always loved storms. I remember the first storm that me and my husband rode out together. We were only dating for about 3 months. I loved the rain on the roof, the sounds of the winds rustling the roof, the sight of the palm trees blowing in the winds and being wrapped up in his arms. I think we came out of that experience closer than we went in. That is a time to really talk and share! Get to know each other.

The other thing the storm brings is new things to replace the old. If you had an old roof and the wind blew if off, guess what FEMA will give you a new one. If your pool screens were old and the wind just ripped them apart more then guess what you get new screens at no cost to you. If your old car was on its last leg, then you could park it under a tree and pray the tree falls on it! You get my point. How you experience anything depends on how you interpret it. Change your mindset that the storm comes to take from you and replace it with the winds of the storm brings change. Changing out the old for the new.

But I still think there is more!
The bible teaches us to keep our eyes on Jesus when we are in the storm.
There was a time when Jesus had sent his disciples to go on before him while he stayed in the mountain to pray (Matthew 14:23).
While they were in the boat there came a storm “and the boat was already a considerable distance from land, buffeted by the waves because the wind was against it.”- Matthew 14:24

Seeing the distress his disciples were in Jesus went to them, walking on water. When Peter saw Jesus he asked him to allow him to come to him, by walking on the water. Peter started to walk on with his faith, however, when Peter reached at a certain distance he got distracted, and when he got distracted by the boisterous wind he became afraid and started to sink.

“But when [Peter] saw the wind, he was afraid and, beginning to sink, cried out, ‘Lord, save me!’” (Matthew 14:30 NIV)

Many of us are like Peter, we started our journey with the Lord and even though the trials of life come, our faith allows us to overcome these trials, you could say to ‘walk on water’. But along the way we get distracted especially when we think the situation has gone on for too long, or we come upon big storm. I am using the storm here as a metaphor for trouble. It was easy to trust God when our trials were little, but what happens when the situations seem bigger than we are able to handle? What happens when we have a category 4 storm? Do we let fear in? Or do we anticipate it with the mindset that it will elevate us to new heights?
Focusing on what’s happening around us will cause us to be afraid; afraid of losing our family, losing our jobs, our homes, or being broke and not having enough to take care of our needs. We start worrying about what is going to happen next and very soon we start to sink.

The storms also bring with it floods. The water could be more dangerous than the winds.
With Irma, I was going to ride out the storm in my home because my house is built to withstand the winds but as soon as they started talking about 10-15 ft. storm surges. I called my husband and said we are leaving now! I was afraid of my car being under water and I pictured me on the roof waiting to be rescued. So, I understand fear!
Joel Osteen had a message about flood waters he used the analogy of your water breaking during childbirth. That flood there signals new birth as is regarded with excitement. He also reminded us that we never know when that flood is going come. His wife Victoria water broke when she was in an elevator going somewhere that was not the hospital! It is all about perception. Ask yourself what is the good that can come out of the house and car being flooded? You get new ones of course ! Usually the insurance pays!

Sometimes you just have to Eat That Frog!
Stop Procrastinating and learn to fly!

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Here are five things God wants you to do if you feel like you’re sinking in a storm.

1. Keep your eyes on Jesus and stay focus.
The moment you take your eyes off the Lord, you will go under. When you focus on the wind and the waves — your circumstances — you’re going to sink, just like Peter. There will be many things happening in the world to get you distracted. Economies going under, crime and violence on the rise, people losing their jobs, accidents on the rise and so forth. These things will get you distress. Jesus tells us that when we see these things happening, that is not the time to get sidetracked, but it is the time to look up (Luke 21:28.

2. Do not be fearful, Jesus is with you in the storm.
When you’re in a storm, it is very easy to become fearful, fearful that you will not get rid of a sickness, fearful that your #marriage will end, fearful that your child will die, fearful that you will not be able to pay off your debts or bills and still have enough money to survive. But when fear comes, and it will come, take authority over it and stand on the promises of God that he will always be with you. Fear comes with torment and that’s why Jesus gives us peace (John 14:27). Peace that will help you to ride out your storms.

3. Don’t let go of faith.
Faith is like our heavenly currency that we use to draw what we need from the spiritual realm. When you maintain your faith you will receive strength to weather the storms of life.

4. Don’t doubt.
You don’t need great faith to make it through the storm in your life. You just need faith in the right person, that is Jesus. Peter started to sink when he started to doubt.

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5. Praise God.
Praise is a weapon, a very powerful one. It confuses the enemy as he cannot understand how you able facing your storms but will have a praise. When Jehoshaphat was facing a large army, he did not use swords to fight his battle, he just praised God and his enemies were totally destroyed. Even in the storm, even when you feel like you’re sinking, even when you’re scared to death — praise him all the time.

The Power and Purpose of Journaling

The power and purpose of journaling

On this weeks episode of the Mindset Transformation radio show and podcast with Coach Myrna, we discuss the Power and Purpose of Journaling. My guest today is Margaret Elizabeth Hulse, a novelist who uses her fine art and jewelry designs to illustrate her journaling stories. Margaret writes stories with her body, mind, spirit that she says exist in the beauty of Texas, the Caribbean, and New Orleans.

Before opening Mpulse Studio | Charlotte St. Charles, Margaret Elizabeth Hulse graduated with a degree from St. Edward’s University and began her career in the arts apprenticing under metal sculptor, Daryl Colburn. She then served as the director of both Tate Gallery Austin and Urban Roots Gallery before she spent time in non-profit development and coordinating effective programs for various organizations. Margaret Elizabeth opened her fine arts studio, Mpulse Studio, in 2014 and launched both her women’s and men’s jewelry lines, Charlotte St. Charles and Stanley Kemp & Co in 2016. In 2016, Margaret wrote her first novel, Sketches from the Heart of a Texas Artist, based on her short story, The Sketchbook and is working on her second novel in the series, Antoine’s Lament.

Margaret feels that the problems experienced by women that are related to feeling stuck can be inspired to transcend from the monotony of day to day, obligatory tasks and into a life life filled with passion and purpose from the power and purpose of journaling. She says “I write relatable, yet sensual, passionate stories that take my readers on new adventures and create custom jewelry so that the wearer has something unique to set her apart from the typical, ‘go-to’ designs. I evoke an excitement that people feel they haven’t been able to tap into for a while, whether it’s because they’ve been hurt, or have simply lost themselves as they’ve tried to make ends meet.”

Journaling power

She feels that through journaling, she learned how to manifest her dream work through writing her way out of a trauma. Her first published journal simply titled, “Sketchbook,” is an illustrated short story that serves as a preamble to her novel, Sketches from the Heart of a Texas Artist. I write and speak often about the power of healing through creativity and how the more you write about something, the more likely it is to come to fruition.

On a personal note, I have always journaled to download and to write down my goals and dreams. The power and purpose for my journaling for me has been manifested in my life over and over.

There are 3 ways to attract anything into your life. First you think it in your mind, then you speak it into the atmosphere, then you write it down to give it form!

Journaling can also help you out of a bad mood.
You Can Write Your Way Out of an Emotional Funk. Here’s How.
journaling-can-help-you-out-of-a-bad-mood.

James Pennebaker, a distinguished professor at the University of Texas, got married right out of college in the early ‘70s. Three years after his marriage, he and his wife started to question their relationship, and Pennebaker, confused and unsettled, sank into a depression. He ate less, drank more, and started smoking. Embarrassed by what he saw as emotional weakness, he became more and more isolated.

One morning about a month into this decline, Pennebaker climbed out of bed and sat down at a typewriter. He stared at the machine for a moment, then started writing freely and frankly about his marriage, his parents, his sexuality, his career, and even death.

As he wrote, and continued to write in the days that followed, something fascinating happened. His depression lifted and he felt liberated. He began to reconnect with his deep love for his wife. But the writing had an even farther-reaching impact. For the first time, he started to see the purpose and possibilities in his life.

Pennebaker’s own experience getting through this rocky period sparked 40 years of research about the links between writing and emotional processing. Over and over again Pennebaker did studies in which he divided people into two groups and asked some to write about emotionally significant experiences, and the others to write about common things: their shoes, or maybe the cars passing on the street. Both groups wrote for the same span—about 20-minutes a day, three days in a row.

In each study, Pennebaker found that the people who wrote about emotionally charged episodes experienced marked improvement in their physical and mental well-being. They were happier, less depressed and less anxious. In the months after the writing sessions, they had lower blood pressure, improved immune function, and fewer visits to the doctor. They also reported better relationships, improved memory, and more success at work.

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How to Find Hardcore Happiness and True Success

How to find hardcore happiness and true success

Welcome to the Mindset Transformation blog and podcast with Coach Myrna Young. Today my guest is Swami Brahmananda Saraswati. Swami G as he is affectionately called, has a mission to help over one million people find Hardcore Happiness and true success. He has designed a master class on How to find hardcore happiness and true success.

In this Master Class, you will learn:

. Why Happiness Matters (+7 meditation download)

. Happiness Formula Blueprint (+Happiness Visions Statement)

. 4 Biggest Happiness Killers (+Mini-Survival Guide)

. Your Happiness (Moving Forward)

. Free Live Webinar #1: Happiness Fast Track

. Free Live Webinar #2: Success

. LIVE Facebook and YouTube Q&A

At the end of this training you will have learned:
How to find your purpose,
How to live your life to the fullest and achieve happiness here and now,
without having to wait/delay or postpone feeling vibrantly alive every day!

Register Now!
www.nakedmoment.com/transfrom

In keepin with the theme of my podcast and blog, I always like to leave you with a tip of the week from Coach Myrna.
This week my tip of the week comes from the book by Deepak Chopra, The 7 Levels of Fullfillment.

Happiness comes from fulfillment, Deepak Chopra’s book the 7 Levels of Fulfillment, references 7 ways to find happiness from fulfillment.

In order for us to find fulfillment we must be Open and Activate or awaken our inner sources of calm, love, and truth,
Spiritual awakening is natural. The process is like waking up in the morning and opening your eyes to the light.
There are seven levels of Fulfillment, When you are fully connected to the light of being which is the light of the self.
There is a light that shines beyond all things on earth, beyond the highest heavens,
This is the light that shines within you.

1: The First level of fulfillment is pure potentiality
2: The 2nd level is Fulfillment from Giving
3: The 3rd level is Fulfillment from Sowing and Reaping
4: The 4th level is Fulfillment from Love
5: The 5th level is Fulfillment from The Desires of your Heart
6: The 6th level is Fulfillment from Detachment
7: the 7th level Fulfillment from being on purpose

Let me tell you a little more about my guest today Swami Brahmananda Saraswati.

Swami Brahmananda Saraswati

• Swami Brahmananda Saraswati was raised in India and at age 4 began studying with ascended masters in an ashram in the Himalayas. By age 12 he was teaching yoga and meditation at the ashram’s yoga school. In 2009 Swami left India to study pre-medicine at a university in Iowa: Maharishi University of Management. He has taught 1000s of people yoga, meditation, and Ayurveda. Now he wants to bring happiness to an even larger audience. Swami is warm and gentle teacher full of light and enthusiasm. He was taught powerful practices that have been independently validated by science to be beneficial to human health including stress reduction, enhanced well-being, creativity and productivity. His compassionate and knowledgeable approach to teaching allows full spectrum learning. He says often we have 100% freedom and 100% responsibility, and this world is dominated by action. Through his teachings and exercises many people have transformed their lives by improving their health and helping them become more deeply connected to themselves.

In this podcast Swami G answers the following questions:

• What is happiness?/ How do I know if I’m happy?
• Why does happiness matter?
• What if my circumstances are (overwhelming/unsupportive family/toxic environment/no time)?/
When someone is struggling trying to stay afloat and keep moving – how can you ask them to be happy?
• Why can’t people choose happiness?/Why don’t people choose happiness?
• Isn’t it wise to suffer in the short-term so we can be happy in the long-term?
• Does the Happiness Formula work for everyone/ Will the happiness formula work for me?

So Let me ask you this question. Are you Happy?
If you are struggling with Anxiety, depression, career issues, relationship issues, work/life balance, performance & productivity enhancement?
Then this training is for you .

Are you longing to feel happy in life?
Are you tired of living an uninspired, unenergized and luke-warm life?

If you are ready to live the life of your dreams, feel in control, fulfilled and driven with purpose then head over to nakedmoment.com/transform where Swami Brahmananda will help you to find the missing pieces and become the person you were born to be.

You deserve happiness, and you CAN attain it. With Swami’s guidance and the power of an entire community of happiness seekers you too can wake up happy.

Don’t know what your perfect life looks like?
Can’t seem to get out of your own way?
Always feel down, filled with fear or guilt?
Do you feel like your environment isn’t supporting you?

Stop feeling like there is no way out. There’s one clear step to take. And right now if you head over to nakedmoment.com/transform there will be some amazing free bonuses for you to get a head start on your happiness journey. Don’t wait. Join a growing community and get happy. Head over to nakedmoment.com/transform.

Bonus Gift!
For all my listeners who sign up for the Happiness training, send me an email to info@myhelps.us and I will send you a bonus gift of my “Mindset Shift Focus Wheel workbook” You need a mindset shift in order to be happy in the present moment regardless of your circumstance.

If you found this blog post and podcast inspiring, please subscribe, rate and review and also share with your friends.
Namaste.

7 Ways to Get Your Confidence Back after a Divorce or Death of a Spouse.

7 Ways to Get Your Confidence Back after a Divorce or Death of a Spouse.

Need to build confidence? This week on Transform your Mind podcast with Coach Myrna, I interview Confidence mentor Di Ridell. Di is going to talk to us today on the subject “7 Ways to get your confidence back after a divorce of death of a spouse.”

As I do every week, I would like to leave you with my tip of the week on “6 Ways to get your Confidence back or to build it up.”

Tip of the week: 6 Tips for Building Unstoppable Confidence:

Building true confidence after the betrayal of a partner is a gradual process. No one is going to turn into a positive, self-confident person overnight.
But if you’re in need of a place to start, here are 6 tips to get you back on the horse.

1. Stop comparing yourself to others.
The worst thing you can do is compare yourself to others. I know from experience that this is a confidence killer, especially if you are comparing yourself to someone younger. Remember that you’re only seeing the surface of their lives and looks, not the underlying reality. Focus instead on what’s important–your own strengths and goals.

2. Keep your limiting beliefs at bay.
Even the most successful people with healthy relationships have limiting beliefs about themselves, but the biggest difference is that they choose to focus on their strengths and possibilities instead of their limits.

3. Live in a positive reality.
Don’t say anything about yourself that you don’t want to become a reality. Positive thoughts and words alone won’t make you a more confident person, but confident people do think a lot of positive things about themselves. Remind yourself of what you’re capable of and what you’ve already accomplished.

4. Don’t mask it.
Self-confidence isn’t the impression you give others; but how you feel about yourself. It’s all about who you are, where you are, and where you want to be in your own life and relationships.

5. Change what you can.
Confident people know they cannot change the past, but they can change the future. They make daily choices that lead them toward the future they want to live out.

6. Be fully committed.
Be fully committed to doing whatever you can to build your success every single day, accepting full responsibility for your life. If it gets uncomfortable, you’re probably on the right track! Don’t procrastinate, do what it takes without agonizing or drama.

My guest today is a toastmaster’s trained Speaker, self published Author , Facilitator and MC . Master Practitioner of NLP, Certified Life Coach and Confidence mentor.
Tune in to hear Di’s story of how she was gang raped at 15 years, forced to give the baby up for adoption and told that she was worthless and that no good man would want her. She ended up in a 31 year marriage that restored her confidence until her husband died and she had to find the confidence to start over and date in the second half of life.

This article from Howard Tullman on How to get your Confidence Back
and Jeffrey R. Carter
Says:

When you loose your confidence, you focus on your fears and not your hopes

Powerful interview, don’t miss it if you are lacking in self confidence.

Show notes:
1. Tell us your journey to becoming a confidence mentor.
2. What is Confidence – is it magical? How we get and lose it?
3. How has confidence contributed to what you do?
4. What advice do you have for women 50 + who have lost their partners or gone through a life changing challenge?
5. What problems do women over 50 experience when starting over after a death or divorce. How do they solve them?
6. Tell us about your book.

Transform your mind podcast

If you like this content, please subscribe to my iTunes podcast and leave a review. Thank you
Transform your Mind iTunes podcast

How to Awaken to Your Soul’s Purpose

Neale Donald Walsch, The Conversations with God

Welcome to the mindset transformation radio show and podcast. Today’s show is very special to me! I am going to share with you an interview with Neale Donald Walsh, author of, “The Conversations with God,” series on, “How to Awaken Your Soul’s Purpose,”
This is special to me because his book revealed deep truths to me. My eyes were opened in wonderment!
Here are some of the revelations from the book “The Conversations with God’

Truths about Prayer:
When you pray in order for your prayer to be received by God it must be in a frequency that he can hear. Just as you cannot hear this radio program if my words were not modulated to be transported over the communication lines and then demodulated back so that you can hear them. It is the same way that prayer works. Except the modulator is faith. Jesus never healed anyone who did not have faith. He said “Your faith has made you whole” So if you are asking God to grand you the desires of your heart and you don’t believe that he will, your prayers will never be answered.

The other part of the prayer mechanics is this:
You will not have that which you ask, nor anything you want because your request is a statement of lack.
Saying you want a thing only works to produce that precise experience – wanting- in your reality.
Abraham of the Law of Attraction books teaches the same thing.
You have to see yourself in position of the thing you want and not what you don’t want, because if you think of what you don’t want, that is exactly what you will attract and that will show up. Wondering why you keep attracting the same no good man into your experience? That is because you are so detailed in what you don’t want in a man and the Universe complies!

So when you pray you must engage faith and thank God for giving you the desires of your heart. You need to tell him all the things you do want in a man. Be just as detailed and then believe him for it. Walk in it. Believe that you already have such a man!

Truths about Relationships:
It is only through your relationship with people, places and events that you can exist in the universe. You are only who you are, relative to what another person is not. That is why opposites attract! Your soul is always looking for its counterpart to complete itself!

When human relationships fail (and they never really fail, they just did not produce the result you wanted), is because they were entered into for reasons not beneficial to their survival.
The purpose of a relationship is to decide what part of yourself you would like to see show up not what part of another you can capture and hold.
This revelation made me look at the purpose of my marriage from Gods eyes.
The good news is that this marriage survived when the others failed because it had a purpose. One of them was to reveal myself to me.

Truths about Abundance:
What is an abundant mindset?
Let’s say that you are walking down the road one day and you see a homeless person begging on the street corner. You go into your wallet and notice you have $7, a $5dollar bill and 2 singles. You start to give the homeless person the $5 bill but decide instead to get him the 2 singles. Why did you change your mind about giving the $5 bill? Was it because you felt that it was too much money to part with? Did you feel that you needed it more than the homeless person?
None of these answers suggest an abundant mindset. You are operating from a spirit of lack.
The most rapid way to change a root thought or sponsoring idea is to reverse the thought-word-deed process.
Do the deed that you want to have the new thought about, then say the words that you want to have the new thought about. Do this often and you’ll train the mind to think a new way.
You are what you think you are. When the thought is a negative one, you have to find a way to break out of the cycle. So much of your present experience is based on your previous thought.
Eg. Let’s say You need $5000 more to close on your new home. You receive a message from God to give $2000 to a sister in the church who just lost her house in a fire. You obey because you have faith that your God is able. Your common sense tells you that you are stupid and that you will never get the money back; but you act on Gods promise. You use the words that God will provide the increase.
He does, a few days later; a check for $10,000 shows up in the mail.
I listened to a message from Joyce Meyers a few weeks back, she shared a similar story. She said that she was broke and laying in bed age her Breast cancer surgery feeling very fearful about her financial situation. Both she and her husband was in full time ministry and depended on her ability to preach for their income. She wouldn’t be able to work for some time.
Then the doorbell rang and someone brought her a check for $10,000. Someone she did not know, but who God sent. From that moment, onward she did not operate out of fear or lack, she knew that God was able.

Soul expressions
When was the last time you cried with joy, wrote poetry, made music, danced in the rain, baked a pie, painted anything, fixed something that was broken, kissed a baby, held a cat to your face, kissed your dog, swam naked, walked at sunrise, played a harmonica, talked till dawn, made love for hours on a beach or in the woods, communed with nature, searched for God, sat alone in silence, or traveled to the deepest part of your being?
When was the last time you said hello to your soul?
Wow! After reading this I made note to say hello to my soul more often. I need to go skinny dipping at the beach, I need to dance in the rain and make love for hours in the woods!

So how do you awaken to your soul’s purpose?
Your soul doesn’t care what you do for a living, the soul only cares what you are being, while you are doing what you are doing.

The function of the soul is to indicate its desire, not impose it.
The function of the mind is to choose from its alternatives.
The function of the body is to act out that choice.
Your soul has brought you to the words you are reading or listening to right now.

This is how I found my purpose.
One day I was reading a local newspaper. Who reads newspapers these days? I never did. But this day now only did a newspaper appear in my space; but I was guided to pick it up and flip through the pages. In one of the pages was a photograph of someone I thought I recognized so I stopped to look at it. It had her name and the title beside her name, Lifecoach! I had never seen that word before or heard it anywhere but I knew immediately that was what I was supposed to do.
My soul has been directing me all my life. It always brings me to where I need to be and the people I need to be with.

True masters are those who have chosen to make a life, rather than a living.

Life’s irony is that as soon as worldly goods and worldly success are of no concern to you, the way is open for them to flow to you.
I do this for free! Open the windows of heaven Lord!

There comes a time in the evolution of every soul when the chief concern is no longer the survival of the physical body, but the growth of the spirit; no longer the attainment of worldly success but the realization of self.

The goal and purpose of your soul is to fully realize itself while in your body. To become the embodiment of all that it really is.

Listen to the author Neale Donald Walsh go into detail

You could also listen on iTunes. Please remember to subscribe.

Transform your mind iTunes link

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Nothing is Impossible If you Believe

Nothing is Impossible If you Believe
Nothing is Impossible If you Believe

Nothing is impossible, If you believe. How to turn life’s challenges into opportunities of self-discovery and personal success.
Todays’ guest on the Mindset Transformation Radio show and podcast with Coach Myrna, is Dr. Sheila D. Williams. Dr Williams is the author of “My Mother’s Keeper”

https://twitter.com/drsdwilliams
In keeping with the theme of my show here is my tip of the week.
Always finish the race, don’t be a quitter.
Come all the way through!
Don’t stop in the middle, don’t turn back!
Just finish the race.
Look at life like a long distance swim trip.
When you start out you have no idea what you are going to meet up with.
You can’t predict the weather, the waves, or any other hazards and obstacles on your journey.
You have to make up in your mind, that you will “Come all the way through,” That if you are able, you will finish the race.
If you get to the middle of the ocean and you run into a thunder storm for instance, you just can’t stop.
Going back is just as perilous as going forward. You have to “come all the way through”

That is exactly how life is, you can’t predict the storms, you can’t predict the challenges that you are going come up against.
You know that they will come. You have to decide up front to “come all the way through.”
You have to know for sure that Nothing is Impossible, if you believe.
God planted that goal or dream in you for a reason. You have something to give to mankind.

If you believe, you will achieve!

You just have to keep moving forward, going back is death to your dreams, it should not be an option!

Show notes:
Today’s show discusses mental illness and how Dr. Williams cared for her mother as she suffered through clinical depression.
Her purpose for writing this book is to shed light on this taboo topic and offer healing to her readers who may be going through something similar.
She decide to be very transparent on her mothers clinical depression and how she cared for her mother from the young age of 10.

Nothing is impossible, if you believe. Listen to hear how Dr Sheila overcame her childhood story and succeed as a Mental Health Therapist/Counselor, a behavior Analyst, Published Author, Life Coach and Educational Director. She tells how she worked sometimes 4 jobs while caring for her terminally ill mother and still was able to earn her PH.D.

Connect with Coach Myrna on Facebook @ https://www.facebook.com/MyhelpsInc/

Instagram @ https://www.instagram.com/myhelps/

Twitter @ https://twitter.com/myrna_morris

web: www.myrnayounghelps.com

To download a copy of Coach Myrna’s book “How to Mind your own business while working your day job”

Small Business: How to Mind your Own Business while working your day job
Small Business: How to Mind your Own Business while working your day job

http://myhelps.us/small-business-ebook/

Listen and Subscribe to my YouTube Channel.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6MCYP6hF8XM

Coach Myrna: 7 Ways to Get Unstuck from Old Patterns

Out of the Snarescoach_myrna_youtube_thumbnail_04

One of the worst negative emotions, in my opinion, is the feeling of being stuck. Defined as moving forward or back looks worse than staying in the misery of your current situation. How do you get yourself unstuck?

Our topic today is “7 Ways to get Unstuck from old patterns.” Listen Live on www.wdjyfm.com every Wednesday at 5.00 pm to the Mindset Transformation radio broadcast with Coach Myrna.

It is a place of no personal power

.
A few months back I received a note on LinkedIn from a young lady who said she was stuck. I felt her pain deep within my soul so I offered her a free coaching session.

She was in an abusive relationship. Her boyfriend was physically abusive to both her and her 2 year old daughter and she feared for her life. She had the courage to pack up and leave that situation. She lived in Florida and her only family lived in Atlanta, Georgia. So she quit her job, left her boyfriend and fled to her sister’s home in Atlanta. Her sister was unemployed and had 6 children. She was dependent on her husband for support. This young lady felt uncomfortable living in her sister’s home because she didn’t have anything for herself and now she had to feed her and her child. She called me because she felt she should go back to her abusive relationship!

feeling-stuck

How many of you can feel her pain?
Being stuck. When the pain of staying in your current intolerable situation looks better than the pain of leaving.
It could be a domestic situation
It could be an intolerable boss
It could be a demeaning job.

How do you make the decision?

How do you find the strength to want something better?

How did I coach this situation?

This is the major benefit of coaching, the ability of the coach to see the frame.

You see you can’t see the frame when you are the picture!

I knew that one of the reasons that my coachee was thinking of going back, was because she still loved her abusive boyfriend. She was trying to get someone else to agree with her.
So I asked her “Do you still love this man?” And she said yes.
Then I allowed her to become aware of what her brain was doing.
I told her that because she still loved this man, she is using the situation of her sister’s lack as the reason to return.
I asked her “Do you think your sister would want you to go back to that situation and maybe end up dead”? She said “no.”
I said think about it. What exactly are you taking from your sister? Space. Space doesn’t cost them anything.
I asked her if she had any money?
She said “yes.” So I said, use that money to buy food for you and your daughter so you can feel better about being a charity case.
.
After we got past the negative feelings, we were then able to plan for the future.

You can’t plan and have hope when you are busy wallowing in negative energy and self-pity.

I asked her about job prospects and she told me she had an interview scheduled for the next day.
That my friends is the First secret to getting unstuck.

1: Hope and Faith!

Faith that God can make a way out of no way.

Faith that even though you can’t see the entire stairway you know that the stairs are there.

The message of faith in this story is that you can’t think that God intended for you to live in an abusive home being dependent on an abusive man for your survival. You have to be able to get out of the valley and see the light of the mountain top. You have to know in your heart that you were meant to be more. You have to want more for your children.

Once you find that positive energy, things will begin to open up. Opportunities will come your way, God will open doors shut by the devil and your negative emotions.

My coachee got the job.
She now lives in Atlanta and she is happy!
The devil is a liar, don’t let him convince you that you can’t do better.

2: Another way to getting unstuck is to move the energy around.

The universe is made up of energy. We are a bundle of energy.
When you have stuck energy it causes disease.
So you have to force yourself to get off the couch, you have to do something, anything.
Do it until you feel like doing it. Do the things you don’t feel like doing until you feel like doing it!

Another client of mine got fired from his job so he sat around all day with his hurt feelings.
Blaming his boss and all his friends who did not support him.

You have to get over dissapointment and hurt so you can get on with it.
Don’t let tragedy destroy you.
Don’t stop, continue to stay busy.
Continue to work your plan take small steps if you can’t take big steps
Automatic negative thoughts don’t take any effort on your part they come naturally like weeds in your garden.
But if you want to grow roses or orchids in your garden it takes special effort and a process.

Similarly, being stuck on something someone did to you is natural.
Feeling angry when your kids are ungrateful for the sacrifices you made for them is natural.
Being fired after working at your job for 10 years, never taking time off for your kid’s soccer matches or dance recitals is natural.
Feeling vengeful at the betrayal of your spouse is natural.

It is natural to be angry, hurt, disappointed, vengeful; but it is important not to stay there.

It is important not to get stuck with your negative emotions. You have to get over them and move on.

3: Seek the council of others when you feel Stuck

What my friend on LinkedIn did was good. She contacted a coach. She received council and got a fresh perspective.
Even if she not heed my advice, she still moved the energy by doing something.

4: Another way is to find peace with the situation if you can’t or won’t move right now.

One way to do this is to memorize and recite the serenity prayer several times per day

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change
The courage to change the things I can
And the wisdom to know the difference.

One of the first things they taught us in coaching school is that you can’t coach someone that is not in front of you. Why was this important? Because most coachees will come into the coaching conversation complaining that their life is a mess because of the actions of someone else. The only person that you can change is yourself. You have no control over the behavior of anyone other than yourself.

I remember a sermon I heard from my first Pastor. He said whenever he felt like complaining about his wife he would pray and ask God to change him!

So for example if you are stuck for the moment in job with a bad boss. Change the way you look at the bad things he or she does. If he or she talks to you with disrespect. You can tell yourself it is not personal, that he or she speaks to everyone like that because he doesn’t know any better.

If he only talks to you with disrespect you can tell yourself that he doesn’t know you and let his words not penetrate your consciousness. He can talk but you do not hear or transfer the words. It becomes just noise.

This is a simple example but it works with anything. This is also called the Law of Allowing. It especially works in intimate relationships.
When you stop resisting and allow your partner the freedom to self-express, you open up the path towards healing the brokenness and allow the relationship to become healthy.

Concentrate only on what you are doing and saying. Stop reacting to stimuli and watch what happens.

5: Another technique is to notice when you are stuck and distract yourself

Come back to the problem later
Write out options and solutions
Write out the worrying situation
Write what you can do about it
Write what you cannot control about it.

6: Most importantly are your thoughts. Whether you are stuck or not, your thinking makes it so.

The thoughts that matter most are your self-thoughts.
It is never the situation that causes you to be stuck but your thoughts and feelings about the situation that makes you feel stuck.

Your thoughts influence your emotions, so to get unstuck think differently, and you will feel differently.

Sometimes, how you think someone should respond to you, blocks your blessings. If you move yourself and your ego out of the way.
Then maybe God can give you what he has in store for you.

Look at the bible story of Naaman. Naaman was angry because the profit did not come out and greet him and bow down to him when he came to him to heal his leprosy. Instead the profit Elisha sent a messenger out to tell Naaman to go wash himself in the river Jordon seven times and he will be restored. . Naaman went away angry because he felt disrespected. But he was smart enough to accept council from one of his servants. The servant told him he had nothing to loose by following the instructions of the profit. The servant was able to see the frame around the picture. Naaman could not. He could only see the situation that was making him mad. He decided to follow the profit’s instructions.
He went and dipped himself in the river Jordon seven times and he came out perfect and clean!.

Naaman almost missed his blessing by reacting to what he considered disrespect.

Some of you are just stuck because of poisonous thinking.
Your thoughts can poison your spirit, and then you never see positive only negative.

As Neapolitan Hill said

As a man thinking so is he.

Shakespeare puts it another way

“Nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so”

7: You have to know yourself to grow yourself

You have to know where your pattern started.
You have to make the connection between your old story and your current circumstances

Eg. If your mother gave you up for adoption and your feeling of abandonment are keeping you stuck in Low self-esteem,
you should become aware that your past has nothing to do with your future.

You know better, that you are not your mom and she had her reasons.
The deeper truth is that you are responsible for your life and not what someone did to you.
You have to shift and take responsibility, you have to know that you keep getting into these situations because of your lack of self-esteem or because of your need for security.
Awareness is key. Once again, a coach can help if you can look at your patterns objectively.

What are you blaming?
What is your pattern? What is the evidence of your pattern?

I had a coaching client who had 3 failed marriages where the men stole from her.
We had to find her pattern and why she kept attracting and falling in love with the same type of man.

We discovered that she loved how her dad took care of her mom and paid all the bills, so she kept looking for that trait in a man.
She ended up getting the opposite.

Did you know that nothing exists without its opposite?
You can’t know light without knowing darkness.
In order to know if something is good you first have to experience bad!

She had to learn to create a new pattern.
She had to go inside and use her feminine power of intuition to pick a mate.
She had to listen to her inner desire and not the outer desire for material pleasures.
When she did that she shifted her pattern and created a new one.
Now she is in the best relationship of her life.

She tells me that she has touched the moon and it feels so good!

To read about my personal journey of getting Unstuck, pick up a copy of my book
” Out of the Snares, a story of hope and encouragement”
Adobe Photoshop PDF

Out of the Snares

5 Mindset Transformations for Permanent Relationships

healthy relationship

A mindset shift or transformation is necessary if your belief system is not producing the results you are expecting in life. As a Life and Transformations Coach, I wanted to share some mindset transformations about relationships that may get you better results. Leave a comment if you agree or disagree!

1. What is the right reason to enter into a long term relationship?

Most of us (including me before I was enlightened) feel that we should enter into a long term commitment because we “fell” in love.
Others may enter into a long term relationship like marriage because they want children; they want security or even to stem loneliness. But, according to Neale Donald Walsch from the “Conversations with God” series, we should put a little more thought into choosing a long term partner than feelings.

bradanglina

We should enter into a long term partnership for a mutually beneficial purpose.

I was watching an very old episode of Oprah a few weeks ago and she was interviewing the Smith’s. I was so impressed with Will Smith and Jada Pinketh Smith’s philosophy on marriage and family. They had a mutually beneficial purpose for their relationship and it continues today. They have family meetings every week to keep the purpose of the marriage and family in front of them.

Their purpose for getting together was to enhance the lives of others and they do that by always choosing work that inspires others.
And even though we have heard many rumors of the marriage failing, it is still standing because their purpose for it is greater than the two of them.

So when two people enter in a long term relationship they have to figure out the Why? What is the mutually beneficial purpose?
-Are they wanting to bring up children for a purpose?
Like Will and Jada Smith
-Are they wanting to enhance Gods kingdom?
Like Joel and Victoria Osteen
-Are they going to change the world through leadership?
Like Barack and Michelle Obama?

If the purpose is strong it will be like a house built on the rocks, it will withstand the storms

2. Why do relationships fail?
Statistics show that relationships fail because of failed expectations.
Most relationships start out with each party having predefined expectations about what they want out of the relationship and what they want from the other person.

Contrary to popular opinion another person cannot complete you, you must complete yourself.

The bible teaches that it is not if another person will disappoint, but when.
So when you enter into a relationship, and its survival is based on what the other person does, says, etc. You will always be disappointed.

The mindset shift is to become the best you, to make sure you are living up to your ideal self because we can never change another person, we can only change ourselves.
For example, there is conflict over a wife’s expectation that her husband takes her out on romantic dinners once per month. She is waiting on him to make the offer and he doesn’t, instead he goes out with his friends and leaves her at home with the kids.
She has several options:
Sulking, picking a fight, going out with her girlfriends – none of which heals the relationship – or she can Give That Which She Wants.
She can take him to dinner, she can cook a romantic dinner and send the kids to the babysitter. She can respond with love.

Anything you want, you first have to give.

3. Become self-centered.
I know this is going to shock some, because we were all brought up to believe that being selfish and self-centered is bad; but not according to the bible!
The bible teaches that we must love others as we love ourselves.

Our first relationship must be with self.

We must learn to honor and cherish self and love ourselves before we can love another.
We can never truly fall in love with another, until we have truly fallen in love with ourselves.
I know women are always sacrificing self for others, they think it makes for a good relationship; but it has the opposite effect.
They get burnt out and then resentment sets in. Then they start to resent their spouse for doing nothing. They cultivated that attitude.
The old saying that you have to train people how to treat you is truth. You start off doing all the work in the home, looking after the kids, doing all the cooking, while your spouse drinks beer and watch TV, then 5 years later when you are burnt out. You shouldn’t blame your spouse!
You should be self centered and make time in the day for your self.
Get up and go to the gym, walk, pray or meditate.
Make time in the evening to reflect, learn something, relax!
Everyone around you will benefit.

4. What should love do when we suffer hurt and disappointment from our loved ones?
We will all have hurt and disappointments in our lives.
In fact there is an old saying that says:

You are either going through something, coming out of something or about to go through something!

It is time for us to adopt a different response to our challenges and disappointments.
As humans we react with pain and hurt to what another is being, saying or doing.
The first thing we should do is to become conscious and aware of the feelings we are having.
Don’t run from the pain, don’t mask it with drugs or alcohol. Feel it, acknowledge it.
Try to find yourself in it.
Be honest with your feelings.

It is very important to not react with vengeance or rage, and to understand your true feelings.
Once you feel it and acknowledge it, it’s power over you diminishes and you can get to the place of this of “This too shall pass”.
After that you can then reach for your highest self and look for the lessons.

A master knows that all experiences comes to teach and is for self-growth.

hilary
5. Should you forgive or look past behaviors of your spouse or significant others because that is the Christian thing to do?
As Christians we are taught to forgive, if we want to forgiveness.
To not judge before we take the plank out of our own eyes.
So it would seem that the Christian thing to do is to forgive our spouses for his/her sins.
But in the book “Conversations with God” by Neale Donald Walsh
The author teaches that you should always do what’s best for us. Remember we are self-centered.
Your girl friends are always going to encourage you to leave your husband because he is a cheater.
Walsch says that you should leave your spouse only if it is best action for you or your children.
You leave when the marriage no longer fulfills its purpose.
Let’s look at Hilary Clinton. I believe she married Bill Clinton with a purpose. He has always been a cheater but she saw his potential as a future President; So she proposed to him and chose to overlook his infidelity. She chose self!
Today her daughter is living a purpose driven life, She was First Lady of the Unites States of America and could become the first female President of the United States of America. You have never heard of her infidelity even though we have heard all about her husband’s.
We should all follow her lead and leave our cheating spouses to God, we should concern ourselves only with self. Being the best we can be and we will get our crown here on earth as well as our heavenly crown in the next life.

Myrna is the Host of the “Mindset Transformation radio show” on http://www.wdjyfm.com/#!on-air/cee5 every Wednesday from 5:00 pm to 6:00 pm
If you would like to be a guest or become a sponsor contact her at info@myhelps.us.
Listen to past broadcasts of the “Mindset Transformations radio show” on the Myhelps Youtube Channel
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC8p2lfxF2GhOihRv8N3EZeA