Tag Archives: menopause

How To Find Body Peace After 40

Body peace, is especially difficult for women over 40 because our bodies are changing, and there are two times in a woman's life that are most susceptible to disordered eating. One is coming into fertility, the other is leaving fertility. Perimenopause, menopause, post menopause, that’s a time where our bodies are again changing, hormones are shifting. And again, what comes up is women become very vulnerable to disordered eating because we're like, oh, my gosh, my body's changing.

Download the podcast here 



Nina Manolson is a Body-Peace® coach. She helps people end the war with food and body and finally feel truly at home in their body—as it is. She is known for her deeply feminist, anti-diet, body-peace approach. She brings her 30 years’ experience as a therapist, Nationally Board-Certified Health & Wellness Coach, Body-Trust® Guide and Psychology of Eating Teacher to helping women create a respectful and trusting relationship with their food and body.

Nina’s Body-Peace work is all in service of helping people get off the diet roller-coaster, and into a compassionate and powerful way of eating & living which creates a positive long-lasting change in and with their bodies. Her courses, coaching and poetry positively change the conversation that women are having with their body. She also writes Body-Poems as a way to encourage a shift in the way we talk to, and about our body.

Myrna: How did you become a, body peace, coach?

Nina: My first diet was when I was nine years old. And then ensued decades of diets on and off, that diet roller coaster of like, oh yes, this is the new latest, greatest thing. This is it. This is how I'm gonna get that perfect body that you know all the magazines and all the blogs are talking about. And then of course that doesn’t happen, because 95% of people who go on diets gain their weight back, in two to five years. So that diet roller coaster was the story of my life to the point where I was like, this has got to change. This is frankly boring.

Sponsored Ad

When feeling stressed or anxious, it can be incredibly frustrating when someone tells you to meditate or do some deep breathing. Although these techniques can help at times, they often don’t actually solve the deeper issues behind our anxiety, stress, sadness, or anger. So, is there a better solution? Yes! Let me tell you about my new favorite mental health app NEUROCYCLE.

Neurocycle is the world’s first clinically-tested brain detox app. It’s a simple audio and video-guided program you do over 63 days to identify the root cause of whatever is causing you pain. I have been using this app for a few weeks now and I love the daily programs to detox my brain and rewire my neural networks. I especially love the exercises for the vagus nerve to promote emotional resilience, and stress relief.

The team behind NEUROCYCLE has spent over 30 plus years developing and testing this mind management system, to help patients who struggle with anxiety, depression, brain injuries, and so many other issues. OVER 1.5 MILLION people worldwide HAVE USED THE NEUROCYCLE program, including world-class athletes, speakers, authors, and celebrities. And, for a limited time, get 50% OFF your first month’s subscription with code TRANSFORM. Go to www.Neurocycle.app –  and click on “access web version” to use promo code TRANSFORM so they know we sent you! This offer is only valid online.

Neurocycle App
Neurocycle App

Nina's journey to becoming a body peace coach

And I have more important things to do in this life than to be obsessed about what I just ate or what the number on the scale is. And so, I started digging deep in my own life, which was a personal journey, but also became a professional journey. I became a therapist. I started as a body worker doing massages and helping women really feel comfortable in their own body.  I started hearing women's body stories and the trauma that we carry and all the shame that we carry about our bodies. Oh, my belly is too big. Oh, my underarms are still flapping when I wave.  Oh, my butt is too you know, depending on the era too big too small to whatever, all that stuff that I was hearing.

And so then I got into also health coaching I was like, I'm gonna figure out how to eat right. Well, that's not it either. Right? That's not the whole answer. Of course, it matters, how we nourish ourselves, but that doesn't actually impact how we feel about our body. So, I started to weave all of those together.

  • How are we in relationship to our body?
  • How are we in the relationship with our food? And that brought me to the work that I've been doing and really cultivating this work of, body peace, out of my own experience out of a lot of training.
Sponsored Ad

Journy: Life Goals & Self-Care app is a personal growth and self-care app that helps you create goals and track your progress.  Journy provides a daily devotional with educational and inspirational content. Journy allows you to save goals and use Affirmation Meditations to affirm your personal progress.

Save personalized notes on categories of learning and improvement, easily watch educational content across a spectrum of categories with recommended reading. There are also routines in the app to help with planning and organizing.

Journy: Life Goals and Self-Care app seeks to help people of all walks of life in their everyday life to maintain a sense of control, through organization, personal development, and self-care while creating a sense of community through volunteering by giving a portion of your $4.99 monthly or $29.99 annual subscription to Kids-in-need foundation and refugees in need. Download Journy: Life Goals & Self-Care AP on Apple App store or Google Play Store, now!

iOS link


Google play link


Journy plan life self care App
Journy: Plan Life & self care App

A poem about body peace: Please don’t weigh me

Here is a, body piece, poem that I wrote. I write poems about our relationship with our body. I want to open the conversation about the scale with a poem, because this conversation about the scale is so important, because so many women are like, yes, that number, but that number.

Please don't weigh me.

She asked me to hop on the scale.

I said, No, thank you. She said we'd like to get a baseline for your health since you're a new patient.

I said, I don't subscribe to the belief that weight determines health. There are more powerful metrics that paint a picture of my vitality.

Another day, she asked me to hop on the scale. I said no, thank you.

She said we're a surgical practice and we may need your weight to determine anesthesia dosages.

I said of course, if I need to have the surgery, I will get on the scale. But right now, we're just having a conversation about the possibility of surgery, not actually prepping for another day.

She asked my daughter to hop on the scale. I said, No, thank you.

We don't weigh ourselves.

I know that your mission is to support healing, but your scale and you're telling my daughter is not healing. It's harmful.

The bathroom scale does not determine our self worth

The, bathroom scale, buys into the diet cultures message that thin is better, that there's a specific number that we're aiming for your scale interrupts my daughter's ability to trust her body. Your measurements have her measuring her self-worth against a number.

I am fighting for my ability to listen to my own body cues.

I am desperately trying to defend my daughter from the impact of a culture that values a particular size over substance.

I am advocating for women to have a relationship with their body that is based on internal cues, not external numbers.

Given my history of dieting and, scale addiction, if you weigh me now, you will be doing harm to my mental health instead of supporting my overall health. So please do not weigh me.

Myrna: That is an awesome poem. I am going to put away my scale! Tell us about your, body peace, message.

How do we find body peace with body imperfections

Nina: Okay, let's say that you are a woman that has a scar, a C section scar, and maybe you're single and you're going into new relationship. You are ashamed to take off your clothes in front of a new man because you're ashamed of that body. It could even be your own husband of 30 years and you are still ashamed for him to see you naked.  You have, body shame. I teach my clients how to make the switch from, body shame, to, body peace.

We all know that feeling of being self-conscious in our body and getting naked. So, how do you make the switch? It's not like a light switch. It's not a light bulb that just goes on and off. We have had 10, 20, 30, 40, 50 years of hating our body of feeling shame. So, we're just can’t flip a switch and we're gonna love your body. And no, that's not how it works. That's actually not sustainable. That's what our $72 billion diet industry teaches us here. Here's a new diet and you will change forever. And we all know that doesn't happen.

What happens is we need to develop a practice. Body peace, isn't a destination. It's why my work isn't called, body love. As much as I love the idea of, body love. Body love, is too aspirational for many women. It's like what? I'm supposed to look in the mirror and love everything I see? And as an aging woman, my body changes all the time. I'm like, oh, there's a new wrinkle I love it. Oh, there's some new body fat, I love it. That's just not realistic. It's not real life.

Let's get into a sustainable way of being with our body and finding, body peace.

Switching from body shame to body peace

Myrna: Excellent, what is the language? How do we talk to ourselves to find, body peace?

Nina: Okay, so, couple of things. One of the things that we're cultivating is compassion for our body. So, we're developing a conversation of compassion with ourselves, because we've learned the language of criticism, we've learned the conversation of hate with ourselves. And what does hate and, body shame, and criticism do? It makes us very stressed. What does stress do? It lifts our cortisol; it lifts up our stress hormones. What does that do? It reduces our metabolism, reduces our calorie burning. It reduces even our immunity.

So what do we want to do? We want to give our body compassion. We want to be kind. We want to have caring kind statements. For example, a woman has a new relationship and she is supposed to get naked and she doesn't feel good about her body, she has, body shame. And the first thing I teach her is to have compassion and acknowledge, this is hard.

That's the compassionate language. Not you should get over it, no this is vulnerable. This is hard. How do I create more safety for myself?

Another way might be to let her partner in on that and say, you know, this is vulnerable for me. I'm concerned that you might judge me. Because I have such a judging voice. I am concerned that you have that same judging voice. Now, frankly, if you are going to bed and having sex with somebody who's judging, I would skip that one altogether.

Myrna: The thing is the man is not judging us. They don't care about your scar.

Nina: They don't absolutely don't.

A good partner sees who we are. They see intimacy as a way to create more connection. They are not in it for the perfect body. And frankly, they don't have a perfect body either. And we are not judging them.  So, softening the conversation with ourselves is so important. And it's also important in this process, to unpack a little. Where did that judgment come from? Because you didn't pack that bag of judgment by yourself. We got it from your gym teacher. We got it from a parent. We got it from maybe a father who would criticize the people who had imperfect bodies on the street. We got it from the mean girls in high school, we got it from whoever we got it for from.

Lizzo body shame or body peace

So, we want to look at our, body shame, story. We get most of it from the images that we see in magazines and on the big screen. But even the women in the magazines don’t look like that. The images are photoshopped.

Poem about Lizzo and her body peace

This poem is called, I wish I felt like Lizzo.

We watched Lizzo belting it out shaking her stuff, being an icon of power and my soulful, beautiful beings have a friend looked at me and said, It's okay for Lizzo but not for me.

I looked at her with one eyebrow raised and say I'm not understanding because I've heard it so many times.

The celebration of body liberation is for all women. Except for you. You're all for fat positivity for owning being all sizes for owning our curves, our belly.

You admire that woman who lives in a large body when she walks into the room with competence and you say oh, yes, I love how she loves her body. I want every woman to love their body like that. But that's not for me.

Somehow you believe the rules are different for you. You're not allowed to feel good in your skin until you lose 15 pounds, until you have a flatter belly, until your arms don't wave in the wind, until you fit into your skinny jeans, until you're sure no one will judge your size, until, until, until.

It's pretty new, you're allowed to feel your power, your beauty, yourself. Lizzo's body is not shrouded in shame. Her fatness is not covered in apologies. She's not promising to be smaller, and you with the wondrous body that you live in right now. You deserve that too.

The scale addiction

Nina: The, scale addiction, is having to weigh yourself. Needing to know what the scale has to say about your life. My clients are like, but I have to weigh myself otherwise I won't know. And then I must be in control and the scale starts to be this like push pull, push pull. I'm low on the scale. Yay. Thumbs up. I'm high on the scale, boo I'm abandoned and the number starts to be a moral judgment on our actual being as a human. So, here is the experiment. You take your scale and you put it in a plastic bag.

If you can't toss it, which I know many people can't. So, you take the scale you put it in a plastic bag and you tie a double knot around it and you take that bag, you put it in another bag with the scale facing down. You tie another knot. So now you have got this scale, two bags to double knots. Then you take that whole bag and you either put it in your garage or your attic or your basement somewhere you don't often get naked, because I know the people who are hooked on the scale are taking up every little tidbit of clothing before, they step on the scale.

So, it goes out of the bathroom or the basement or garage or wherever somewhere you don't get naked.

Myrna: You hit the nail on the head. I have scale addition myself.  I wonder if I've lost weight. I feel a little lighter or I feel a little heavier. Maybe I should check.

Nina: You can start to think what am I asking the scale to tell me?

  • That I'm a valuable person,
  • that I am good,
  • that I can trust my actual internal experience of myself,
  • that if I feel vital, that I actually am because the numbers down or if I'm feeling a little sluggish that maybe I haven't been eating in the way that I really would like to support myself?
  • Do I need a little piece of metal to tell me how I actually feel on the inside?

Larger body does not mean unhealthy

And I'm gonna say just straight up you don't need the scale. It's trusting your own knowing of your body. We do not need a piece of equipment to tell us how we are doing. We're women we know what makes us feel good. I know what would make me feel mobile, agile, vibrant, alive. Sexy, sensual, all the good things and love it.

You can be in a larger body and be somebody who walks and who eats well, and who's healthy. Health is not defined by the number on the scale, but rather some more important metrics. How's your heart doing? How's your cholesterol doing? How's your blood sugar doing? Right? Those are important metrics.

To clarify that, I'm not promoting that you eat what the heck you want, whenever you want right with people because part of this work is giving yourself permission to eat and not being so tight and restricted.

Finding body peace after 40

Myrna: How do we have, body peace, after the age of 40.

Nina: Body peace, is especially difficult for women over 40 because our bodies are changing, and there are two times in a woman's life that are most susceptible to disordered eating. One is coming into fertility. That is why you see eating disorders in teenagers, because their bodies are changing. This is normal, right? Getting a period and developing breasts. There's normal waking, but our culture says oh, no, you should still look like you're 12 and then the diets start.

The other time is when we are leaving fertility, pre perimenopause, menopause, post menopause, that’s a time where our bodies are again changing, hormones are shifting. And again, what comes up is women become very vulnerable to disordered eating because we're like, oh, my gosh, my body's changing. That can't happen. Oh my gosh, I'm gonna pass that number on the scale, right? My belly is getting bigger, I’m gonna do something and we get into what I call body management. And that can move easily into eating disorders, obsession, and not actually enjoying our life.

Myrna: tell us about your, body peace, coaching programs and how our listeners can connect with you, your social media handles, your website, etc.

Nina: My website is www.NinaManolson.com. You can also just search bodypeacewithnina.com. And there's a couple of things on that website that you'll find that super helpful to start your journey into your own, body peace, journey and they're all free.  One is a, body peace, masterclass, that really goes into the different kinds of relationships that women have with their bodies. And the other is a journal that's practicing, body peace.  It's a free journal, you can download it, and in there are some of my, body peace, poems.

But even more importantly, there's 20 questions that if you were sitting with me, I would ask you about how is your relationship with your body? How did it come to be that way? How do you feel right to start you really asking yourself these important questions so that you can start to create a relationship with your body and we feel that feels good and solid? And the one last thing that I want to share that is brand new is I have an app, on body piece.

You can find more information about that, at body peace app. I'm super excited about the, body peace, app because it has tons of resources. It has the, body peace, seekers program. It has a, body peace, starter kit program. It has free meditations, body peace poems, the masterclasses there, it's got a lot of resources to support you in your journey to finding, body peace. connect with Nina https://www.instagram.com/ninamanolson/

Additional Resources

How to Love Yourself and Heal The Body

Why Homecare is Absolutely the Best Option For Dementia Patients

If you have, dementia, then there are certain, nursing care, needs when, dementia, presents itself because it goes until death. Let's say that my mom or someone I'm responsible for starts exhibiting symptoms of, dementia.  How do I decide on whether to put them in a, nursing home, or to get, home care?

Listen to the full podcast interview here:


My guest today is MERRILY ORSINI, Pres/CEO of Corecubed, is considered a thought leader in the healthcare at home industry and is involved in numerous organizations, providing insight and advice. Merrily is a leader in the Help Choose Home initiative, podcast creator and host. She focuses on educating how and when to choose healthcare at home. Orsini won a Lifetime Achievement in Business Award at the 2017 Stevie Awards for Women in Business. Orsini’s business ownership began with a geriatric care managed in-home care agency, a venture that garnered her the prestigious Ernst & Young Entrepreneur of the Year Award in 1996

Myrna – Tell us your journey into your first geriatric care managed in home care agency.  Was it because you had a, dementia, parent who needed help?

Introduction to Home Care

Merrily – I sort of fell into it.  I have a master's in social work and an interest in helping people. I was in a personal situation where I needed to make more money.  So, I decided to become an entrepreneur and start my own Business.  Soon after I opened the doors of that business, I got a request from a friend of mine to provide what at that time we called a babysitting service for one of her clients whose wife had senile, dementia.

That began was a lifelong commitment for me to provide care for anyone who is suffering from, Alzheimer's.  We progressed with my first patient  from her early stages of, Alzheimer's dementia, through end stage.

We ended up caring for lots of other people with lots of other issues but the issue of, dementia, is probably the most frightening and the hardest care. I stayed in the, home care, space directly providing, nursing care, services from 1981 to 1998.

Sponsored Ad

About 3 years ago, I started losing my hair. A dermatologist confirmed I had Alopecia.  This dampened my spirits; but instead of becoming depressed and sad, I wanted to regrow my hair along my personality and mood.

That's how my bald and bougie collection was born. My shirt collection is made for people like me, who suffer from Alopecia. It is my way of offering them something to smile about and hold their bald heads high.

As a resident of Atlanta. GA, I want to offer my bald and bougie collection to help women, men and kids who are suffering hair loss due to alopecia, cancer, or any type of disease a shirt from my BALD AND BOUGIE… collection. Visit  www.baldandbougie.com

Transform your Mind Spotify Podcast
Download on Spotify


Myrna – I don't have any personal experience with this, in my family but there's a lot of movies out there that address the subject of, Alzheimer’s disease. The most famous is the movie the Notebook.

When I started, menopause, I personally started forgetting things and I was very afraid of that it was the start of, Alzheimer’s disease. But I was reassured by my doctor that if there is no history of, dementia, in my family then there is a good chance that I would not get, Alzheimer’s disease.


What kinds of services do you provide in the home healthcare space for dementia patients?

Merrily – my business provides support to the industry.  I'm not in the direct provision of, home care, anymore.  The thing about, dementia, is that it's not a one-size-fits-all disease. It also manifests itself differently in different people.  Some people become very calm, quiet and reserved and other people become aggressive.

The disease progresses at different times,  it is a debilitating disease if you have an, Alzheimer’s,  type, dementia, or some of the other kinds of, dementia, it's debilitating and it gets worse.

For instance you mentioned, menopause, there are several things that do cause something that looks like, dementia.  For instance, medication mismanagement.  I had a client one time who was severely malnourished, and that malnourishment actually translated itself into, dementia.

The question of, home care, it is again it's not a one-size-fits-all because someone who has a, dementia, needs a totally different kind of care than someone who has a frailty or a disease. It's two totally different kinds of care and it's also takes different kinds of caregivers.

Sponsored Ad

The Science-Fiction/Fantasy novel, The Seed of Life is now available on Amazon. This book features strong female leads at the forefront of their planet's defense militia.

At just 23 years old Kameclara achieved her childhood dream of becoming an operative of the Intergalactic Military. Their main task is protecting their home planet Teroma.

This mission afforded them the chance of finding another place more like home;  her team is taken into the fold of the planet’s deepest secrets. They learn their system contains nine planets, not the seven they were taught in school.

Pick up your copy of the Seed of Life today and discover with Kameclara  the fate of all her people… and the true purpose of their mission.

The Seed of Life now available on Amazon.

Book The seed of life
Book The seed of life


Why Home Care is the best option for Dementia Patients.

There's different ways that you actually can talk to someone or be around someone with, Alzheimer’s, and there's a handful of generic kinds of rules for, nursing care; but the biggest one is this. It is hard for families is when someone starts forgetting and they actually have, dementia.

That's irreversible and it's going to get worse. the worst thing you can do is try to orient them to right now, because they're not there.  They're not mentally in the present and it's very scary for someone with the, dementia, to think that they're somewhere else and then have someone try to orient them today.

It’s like waking up in a dream and you know you you're dreaming you're someplace and if someone said you're not there it would be scary. The, dementia, patient  turns against them, because they quit trusting them.

They quit trusting them because the person is trying to orient them back to reality.

Sponsored Ad

Are you a burdened content creator, indie artist , or unsigned musician who is looking for an opportunity to go viral without bias? Then Lit vibe is for you.

Lit vibe is a short format social network designed for creatives to showcase their talents to the world and build their audience without special endorsement or referrals. Lit vibe is easy to use with fun innovative features. We take user privacy seriously. Lit vibe is the new go to app.

Don’t sit on the sidelines and let your music or creativity go unnoticed.

Download lit vibe today and start posting your content, you might become the next internet sensation. Lit vibe is available on AppStore and Playstore or visit www.litvibe.co


Transform Your Mind iHeart Radio
iHeart Radio

Dementia Test

The mini mental status test is about five questions:

  • It starts off with “what day is today”
  • Who's the president of the United States
  • Ask them to make you a cup of tea because that requires is sequential steps.
  • Can they still dress themselves or take care of themselves. Oftentimes not because they don't remember.  Sometimes people with, dementia, take all their clothes off and run out into the yard.

So many of the normal activities of daily living processes that you that you would not lose unless you had, dementia.


Ways to prevent Alzheimer’s type dementia

If you have a healthy lifestyle and by that I mean eating well, exercising and getting plenty of sleep. All of those things can help you prevent that onset of, dementia, but if you actually have an, Alzheimer’s,  type, dementia, no matter what you do it is going to eventually come.

Keeping your mind active is the other way to prevent the onset of, dementia. We're creatures of habit so if you brush your teeth with your right hand, try brushing your teeth with your left hand.  Simple things like that.

Learning a foreign language that's one of the most amazing things you can do because it uses parts of your brain that you don't normally use.

So if you've done crossword puzzles your whole life and you think by continuing to do crossword puzzles you're going to somehow keep dementia at bay, that's not true.  You need to do something different like learn how to dance.  Do something that involves your body and your mind, that is different than anything that you've ever done before.


Transform your Mind TuneIn Radio
TuneIn Radio

Is  Alzheimer’s dementia different from just dementia?

You characterize, Alzheimer’s dementia, from just, dementia, can you give us what the difference is?

Merrily – There are all different kinds of, dementia.  Alzheimer's, is what we most hear about; but it is a specific disease that has some specific characteristics.


There are other types of, dementia.

  • Lewy Body dementia which is what Robin Williams had
  • There’s frontal-temporal dementia.
  • Alcohol related dementia that comes from overusing alcohol
  • Vascular Dementia
  • Mixed dementia and that is a combination of Alzheimer’s dementia and Vascular dementia.


Home Care for Dementia patients

If you have, dementia, then there are certain, nursing care, needs when, dementia, presents itself because it goes until death.

Let's say that my mom or someone I'm responsible for starts exhibiting symptoms of, dementia.  How do I decide on whether to put them in a nursing home or to get, home care?

There is no universal long-term care program for people in America, we have an overly complicated, home care, system.  Some of it funded by the government and some of it paid for privately, so it really depends on what your financial resources are and what your support system is.

Right now very few people want to go into a congregant, nursing home, setting because of the exposure. You look at the deaths in America where 40 percent or more happen in congregate, nursing home, care settings from COVID 19.

So, if you have a loved one with, dementia, the first thing to do is go somewhere where you can get a real good screening.  I would recommend a geriatric evaluation and treatment program through a teaching university.

The next step after they say you do have a progressive disease, is to really look at time frame, because a lot of people can stay at home with just a little bit of care as long as there, dementia, is not progressed to the point where they are endangering themselves.

Staying at home is probably the best place because people who have, dementia, like familiar surroundings and they also like a routine.

But the question between, home care, or, nursing home, really comes down to cost and support.

Sponsored Ad

Are you using different types of cosmetics and still can’t get rid of your acne or wrinkles? Are you gaining weight and want to lose some fat to get in beautiful shape?

Introducing bossyroosa’s health and beauty products specially designed for women who have acne, wrinkles, dull skin, and extra fat that is getting in your way to look and feel more beautiful. Our beauty products can get rid of those problems and bring out your true beauty within a few weeks.

So Say hello to spotless, translucent skin with a healthy glow and celebrate every day with your new health.

Visit bossyroosa.com and find your true beauty now. That’s bossyroosa.com

Transform your Mind Stitcher
Transform your Mind Stitcher


Tell us about your podcast Help Choose Home.

The reason I started the Help Choose home podcast, is that what I have found is people don't actually look for any of these answers or even information until they have a need. Someone has a care need for a family member and then they start researching. So the Help Choose home podcast, is really just about educating people about how to choose, nursing homes, or, home care.

How can those listening and watching on YouTube connect with you?

The national association for home care and hospice which is one of the sponsors of my podcast has very good resources and you mentioned AARP.  AARP has excellent resources as well The home care association of America and the National Palliative Hospice and Palliative care organization.


My own website is www.merrilyorsini.com My business is corecubed.com


I'm inviting you to join my Facebook group called life coach and please subscribe to the podcast on our YouTube channel and where ever you get your podcasts.


Additional Resources