Tag Archives: weight

How To Find Body Peace After 40

Body peace, is especially difficult for women over 40 because our bodies are changing, and there are two times in a woman's life that are most susceptible to disordered eating. One is coming into fertility, the other is leaving fertility. Perimenopause, menopause, post menopause, that’s a time where our bodies are again changing, hormones are shifting. And again, what comes up is women become very vulnerable to disordered eating because we're like, oh, my gosh, my body's changing.

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Nina Manolson is a Body-Peace® coach. She helps people end the war with food and body and finally feel truly at home in their body—as it is. She is known for her deeply feminist, anti-diet, body-peace approach. She brings her 30 years’ experience as a therapist, Nationally Board-Certified Health & Wellness Coach, Body-Trust® Guide and Psychology of Eating Teacher to helping women create a respectful and trusting relationship with their food and body.

Nina’s Body-Peace work is all in service of helping people get off the diet roller-coaster, and into a compassionate and powerful way of eating & living which creates a positive long-lasting change in and with their bodies. Her courses, coaching and poetry positively change the conversation that women are having with their body. She also writes Body-Poems as a way to encourage a shift in the way we talk to, and about our body.

Myrna: How did you become a, body peace, coach?

Nina: My first diet was when I was nine years old. And then ensued decades of diets on and off, that diet roller coaster of like, oh yes, this is the new latest, greatest thing. This is it. This is how I'm gonna get that perfect body that you know all the magazines and all the blogs are talking about. And then of course that doesn’t happen, because 95% of people who go on diets gain their weight back, in two to five years. So that diet roller coaster was the story of my life to the point where I was like, this has got to change. This is frankly boring.

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Nina's journey to becoming a body peace coach

And I have more important things to do in this life than to be obsessed about what I just ate or what the number on the scale is. And so, I started digging deep in my own life, which was a personal journey, but also became a professional journey. I became a therapist. I started as a body worker doing massages and helping women really feel comfortable in their own body.  I started hearing women's body stories and the trauma that we carry and all the shame that we carry about our bodies. Oh, my belly is too big. Oh, my underarms are still flapping when I wave.  Oh, my butt is too you know, depending on the era too big too small to whatever, all that stuff that I was hearing.

And so then I got into also health coaching I was like, I'm gonna figure out how to eat right. Well, that's not it either. Right? That's not the whole answer. Of course, it matters, how we nourish ourselves, but that doesn't actually impact how we feel about our body. So, I started to weave all of those together.

  • How are we in relationship to our body?
  • How are we in the relationship with our food? And that brought me to the work that I've been doing and really cultivating this work of, body peace, out of my own experience out of a lot of training.
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A poem about body peace: Please don’t weigh me

Here is a, body piece, poem that I wrote. I write poems about our relationship with our body. I want to open the conversation about the scale with a poem, because this conversation about the scale is so important, because so many women are like, yes, that number, but that number.

Please don't weigh me.

She asked me to hop on the scale.

I said, No, thank you. She said we'd like to get a baseline for your health since you're a new patient.

I said, I don't subscribe to the belief that weight determines health. There are more powerful metrics that paint a picture of my vitality.

Another day, she asked me to hop on the scale. I said no, thank you.

She said we're a surgical practice and we may need your weight to determine anesthesia dosages.

I said of course, if I need to have the surgery, I will get on the scale. But right now, we're just having a conversation about the possibility of surgery, not actually prepping for another day.

She asked my daughter to hop on the scale. I said, No, thank you.

We don't weigh ourselves.

I know that your mission is to support healing, but your scale and you're telling my daughter is not healing. It's harmful.

The bathroom scale does not determine our self worth

The, bathroom scale, buys into the diet cultures message that thin is better, that there's a specific number that we're aiming for your scale interrupts my daughter's ability to trust her body. Your measurements have her measuring her self-worth against a number.

I am fighting for my ability to listen to my own body cues.

I am desperately trying to defend my daughter from the impact of a culture that values a particular size over substance.

I am advocating for women to have a relationship with their body that is based on internal cues, not external numbers.

Given my history of dieting and, scale addiction, if you weigh me now, you will be doing harm to my mental health instead of supporting my overall health. So please do not weigh me.

Myrna: That is an awesome poem. I am going to put away my scale! Tell us about your, body peace, message.

How do we find body peace with body imperfections

Nina: Okay, let's say that you are a woman that has a scar, a C section scar, and maybe you're single and you're going into new relationship. You are ashamed to take off your clothes in front of a new man because you're ashamed of that body. It could even be your own husband of 30 years and you are still ashamed for him to see you naked.  You have, body shame. I teach my clients how to make the switch from, body shame, to, body peace.

We all know that feeling of being self-conscious in our body and getting naked. So, how do you make the switch? It's not like a light switch. It's not a light bulb that just goes on and off. We have had 10, 20, 30, 40, 50 years of hating our body of feeling shame. So, we're just can’t flip a switch and we're gonna love your body. And no, that's not how it works. That's actually not sustainable. That's what our $72 billion diet industry teaches us here. Here's a new diet and you will change forever. And we all know that doesn't happen.

What happens is we need to develop a practice. Body peace, isn't a destination. It's why my work isn't called, body love. As much as I love the idea of, body love. Body love, is too aspirational for many women. It's like what? I'm supposed to look in the mirror and love everything I see? And as an aging woman, my body changes all the time. I'm like, oh, there's a new wrinkle I love it. Oh, there's some new body fat, I love it. That's just not realistic. It's not real life.

Let's get into a sustainable way of being with our body and finding, body peace.

Switching from body shame to body peace

Myrna: Excellent, what is the language? How do we talk to ourselves to find, body peace?

Nina: Okay, so, couple of things. One of the things that we're cultivating is compassion for our body. So, we're developing a conversation of compassion with ourselves, because we've learned the language of criticism, we've learned the conversation of hate with ourselves. And what does hate and, body shame, and criticism do? It makes us very stressed. What does stress do? It lifts our cortisol; it lifts up our stress hormones. What does that do? It reduces our metabolism, reduces our calorie burning. It reduces even our immunity.

So what do we want to do? We want to give our body compassion. We want to be kind. We want to have caring kind statements. For example, a woman has a new relationship and she is supposed to get naked and she doesn't feel good about her body, she has, body shame. And the first thing I teach her is to have compassion and acknowledge, this is hard.

That's the compassionate language. Not you should get over it, no this is vulnerable. This is hard. How do I create more safety for myself?

Another way might be to let her partner in on that and say, you know, this is vulnerable for me. I'm concerned that you might judge me. Because I have such a judging voice. I am concerned that you have that same judging voice. Now, frankly, if you are going to bed and having sex with somebody who's judging, I would skip that one altogether.

Myrna: The thing is the man is not judging us. They don't care about your scar.

Nina: They don't absolutely don't.

A good partner sees who we are. They see intimacy as a way to create more connection. They are not in it for the perfect body. And frankly, they don't have a perfect body either. And we are not judging them.  So, softening the conversation with ourselves is so important. And it's also important in this process, to unpack a little. Where did that judgment come from? Because you didn't pack that bag of judgment by yourself. We got it from your gym teacher. We got it from a parent. We got it from maybe a father who would criticize the people who had imperfect bodies on the street. We got it from the mean girls in high school, we got it from whoever we got it for from.

Lizzo body shame or body peace

So, we want to look at our, body shame, story. We get most of it from the images that we see in magazines and on the big screen. But even the women in the magazines don’t look like that. The images are photoshopped.

Poem about Lizzo and her body peace

This poem is called, I wish I felt like Lizzo.

We watched Lizzo belting it out shaking her stuff, being an icon of power and my soulful, beautiful beings have a friend looked at me and said, It's okay for Lizzo but not for me.

I looked at her with one eyebrow raised and say I'm not understanding because I've heard it so many times.

The celebration of body liberation is for all women. Except for you. You're all for fat positivity for owning being all sizes for owning our curves, our belly.

You admire that woman who lives in a large body when she walks into the room with competence and you say oh, yes, I love how she loves her body. I want every woman to love their body like that. But that's not for me.

Somehow you believe the rules are different for you. You're not allowed to feel good in your skin until you lose 15 pounds, until you have a flatter belly, until your arms don't wave in the wind, until you fit into your skinny jeans, until you're sure no one will judge your size, until, until, until.

It's pretty new, you're allowed to feel your power, your beauty, yourself. Lizzo's body is not shrouded in shame. Her fatness is not covered in apologies. She's not promising to be smaller, and you with the wondrous body that you live in right now. You deserve that too.

The scale addiction

Nina: The, scale addiction, is having to weigh yourself. Needing to know what the scale has to say about your life. My clients are like, but I have to weigh myself otherwise I won't know. And then I must be in control and the scale starts to be this like push pull, push pull. I'm low on the scale. Yay. Thumbs up. I'm high on the scale, boo I'm abandoned and the number starts to be a moral judgment on our actual being as a human. So, here is the experiment. You take your scale and you put it in a plastic bag.

If you can't toss it, which I know many people can't. So, you take the scale you put it in a plastic bag and you tie a double knot around it and you take that bag, you put it in another bag with the scale facing down. You tie another knot. So now you have got this scale, two bags to double knots. Then you take that whole bag and you either put it in your garage or your attic or your basement somewhere you don't often get naked, because I know the people who are hooked on the scale are taking up every little tidbit of clothing before, they step on the scale.

So, it goes out of the bathroom or the basement or garage or wherever somewhere you don't get naked.

Myrna: You hit the nail on the head. I have scale addition myself.  I wonder if I've lost weight. I feel a little lighter or I feel a little heavier. Maybe I should check.

Nina: You can start to think what am I asking the scale to tell me?

  • That I'm a valuable person,
  • that I am good,
  • that I can trust my actual internal experience of myself,
  • that if I feel vital, that I actually am because the numbers down or if I'm feeling a little sluggish that maybe I haven't been eating in the way that I really would like to support myself?
  • Do I need a little piece of metal to tell me how I actually feel on the inside?

Larger body does not mean unhealthy

And I'm gonna say just straight up you don't need the scale. It's trusting your own knowing of your body. We do not need a piece of equipment to tell us how we are doing. We're women we know what makes us feel good. I know what would make me feel mobile, agile, vibrant, alive. Sexy, sensual, all the good things and love it.

You can be in a larger body and be somebody who walks and who eats well, and who's healthy. Health is not defined by the number on the scale, but rather some more important metrics. How's your heart doing? How's your cholesterol doing? How's your blood sugar doing? Right? Those are important metrics.

To clarify that, I'm not promoting that you eat what the heck you want, whenever you want right with people because part of this work is giving yourself permission to eat and not being so tight and restricted.

Finding body peace after 40

Myrna: How do we have, body peace, after the age of 40.

Nina: Body peace, is especially difficult for women over 40 because our bodies are changing, and there are two times in a woman's life that are most susceptible to disordered eating. One is coming into fertility. That is why you see eating disorders in teenagers, because their bodies are changing. This is normal, right? Getting a period and developing breasts. There's normal waking, but our culture says oh, no, you should still look like you're 12 and then the diets start.

The other time is when we are leaving fertility, pre perimenopause, menopause, post menopause, that’s a time where our bodies are again changing, hormones are shifting. And again, what comes up is women become very vulnerable to disordered eating because we're like, oh, my gosh, my body's changing. That can't happen. Oh my gosh, I'm gonna pass that number on the scale, right? My belly is getting bigger, I’m gonna do something and we get into what I call body management. And that can move easily into eating disorders, obsession, and not actually enjoying our life.

Myrna: tell us about your, body peace, coaching programs and how our listeners can connect with you, your social media handles, your website, etc.

Nina: My website is www.NinaManolson.com. You can also just search bodypeacewithnina.com. And there's a couple of things on that website that you'll find that super helpful to start your journey into your own, body peace, journey and they're all free.  One is a, body peace, masterclass, that really goes into the different kinds of relationships that women have with their bodies. And the other is a journal that's practicing, body peace.  It's a free journal, you can download it, and in there are some of my, body peace, poems.

But even more importantly, there's 20 questions that if you were sitting with me, I would ask you about how is your relationship with your body? How did it come to be that way? How do you feel right to start you really asking yourself these important questions so that you can start to create a relationship with your body and we feel that feels good and solid? And the one last thing that I want to share that is brand new is I have an app, on body piece.

You can find more information about that, at body peace app. I'm super excited about the, body peace, app because it has tons of resources. It has the, body peace, seekers program. It has a, body peace, starter kit program. It has free meditations, body peace poems, the masterclasses there, it's got a lot of resources to support you in your journey to finding, body peace. connect with Nina https://www.instagram.com/ninamanolson/

Additional Resources

How to Love Yourself and Heal The Body

Nutrition: The Role Of A Dietitian

Nutrition, is the study of nutrients in food, how the body uses them, and the relationship between diet, health, and disease. A, Dietitian, play a really big role in people's overall health. It's not just about, weight loss, proper, nutrition, can reduce the burden of disease, prevent and reverse disease.

Today I interview Vanessa Rissetto, registered Dietician and co-founder of Culina Health.

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As the co-founder of Culina Health, Vanessa’s magic lies in her realistic and personalized approach to nutrition. With science as her first love, she is interested in helping clients to take an active role in their health journey with the help of her expertise: personalized lifestyle plans backed by evidenced-based, science-driven nutrition counseling, adult weight management, and building a better relationship with food. Vanessa received her MS in Marketing at NYU and completed her Dietetic Internship at Mount Sinai Hospital where she worked as a Senior Dietitian for five years.

Introduction to Nutrition

Myrna: You said science is your first love? Can you share your journey into becoming a registered, dietitian?

Vanessa:  Nutrition, is a discipline, in and of itself. And, nutrition, is a modality that elicits change. We know that anecdotally, and we are now starting to track data around that.  So a, dietitian, play a really big role in people's overall health. It's not just about, weight loss, I think that's the old narrative.  A, dietitian, is not somebody who is very elite and unattainable, and unaffordable.

So, if you can't afford, dietitian, and you're all relegated to being, unhealthy, and that's not the case, and we do much more than just manage some of the, weight.  Proper, nutrition, helps if you have, diabetes, if you have, kidney disease, cancer, or a nursing mother, and you want to help increase your milk supply.  All of these things, a, dietitian, can help you with. People don't realize this and we also take insurance.

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Using Your Insurance for better nutrition

My company Culina Health does take insurance. 91% of the patients that we see all exercise their insurance benefits. So, the services of a, dietician,  is basically a luxury service that you're not even really paying for. And using the help of a, dietitian, is going to help you with your, nutrition, will help extend your life. That's what a, dietitian, is there for.

The physician will save your life and the, dietitian, will keep you healthy.

Myrna: That's true, nutrition, is a big thing. I remember reading a book. I think it was Deepak Chopra's book, Perfect Health and he was saying that everybody should have a, nutrition book, everybody should have something or someone like a, dietician, who tells them about, nutrition. I like that your specialty, or your modality is you want to call it a, science based nutrition.

That's working with how their body processes and things, because one of the things I also learned is that the, digestive system, is just as unique as your fingerprint.

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Your nutrition is linked to you digestive system

Myrna: Everybody has a different, digestive system. So I'm sure a, dietitian, is somebody that can help you with that. I went to a, dietitian, once because my cholesterol was high. I know, nutrition, plays a big role in fighting, cancer. What made you decide to go into the, dietitian, field?

Vanessa: I studied biology in college, but I just didn't become a doctor for whatever reason. I went to a, dietitian, myself, in college, I had gained 50 pounds, because I didn't know anything about food. My mother wasn't somebody who thought about calories. We didn't have a scale in our house. And so I ate the food that my mother cooked every single day. And that was it. And I never had a problem with my, weight, and I didn't overthink the food that I ate.

We know that soda has chemicals and copious amounts of sugar. And it can affect your, weight, in a negative way. And so I gained all this, weight, in college. For me vegetable carbohydrates worked with my, digestive system, so I lost all the weight, but I didn't really understand how. I knew that a, dietitian, would be the person to tell me, so I went and met with a, dietitian, her name is Keri Glassman, she's a good friend of mine to this day. And she explained, nutrition, to me in a very pragmatic way.

How food affects your body. If this is your goal, this is what and how you should eat. And so it gave me clarity on what I was doing. I went on to lose another 15 pounds, not even because I was trying, but because I started to piece together how she recommended eating. It wasn't a restrictive prescription. It was you need to have a protein, a fat and a carbohydrate, every single meal. And I thought, wow, I could offer this service for other people. That seems very exciting and interesting. I started taking classes again and going on this journey to become a, dietitian.

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Becoming a Dietician

Myrna: That's awesome. You know, a lot of people become life coaches, because they were, life coaching, clients. So you became a, dietitian, because you liked your, dietitian. But alright, let's dissect that a little bit. The advice from your, dietician, was to eat a balanced meal.  She told you that you should have carbohydrates, fat, and protein at every meal.

Would that be considered, intuitive eating, or, prescriptive eating? So what I want to understand that even though we're all different, our bodies are all different scientifically. How does one size fit all? When you talk about, prescriptive eating, which means that everybody was following the same pattern, they have carbohydrates, proteins and fats at every meal.  What does, prescriptive eating, look like?

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Prescriptive eating plans from a dietician

Vanessa: Prescriptive eating, is if I tell you how and what to eat. If I tell you how to put the pieces together, that's going to lead you down a path towards, prescriptive eating.

Intuitive Eating, on the other hand is just knowing what works for you and only eating those foods. That works for some people and it doesn't work for others. Some people need more guardrails like, prescriptive eating, and other people don't. Your first experience with food depends on what on your how you were raised.

  • Did you grow up food insecure?
  • Does your mother have an eating disorder?
  • Did your parents use food to bribe you?
  • Are you constantly made to feel ashamed because you are overweight or underweight?
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The role insulin plays in nutrition

These are all the psychological factors and components that play and so, dietitians, have to understand The patient and every person is individualized. And that's why like we at Culina Health provide, personalized nutrition. So, for example, if you were a type two, diabetic, I would counsel you an entirely different way, than somebody who comes to me and says, all I do is think about food every single day and what I'm eating like every minute of every day, I'm thinking about what I'm eating. Well, that's, that's an eating disorder. And so we need to deal with that in a very different way.

But if you're a type two, diabetic, it's completely reasonable for me to say carbohydrates, affects your blood sugar, they raise your blood sugar, they tell your liver, store fat. When the blood sugar is raised, your pancreas mobilizes insulin. Insulin helps to bring the carbohydrate in the cells, that's a storage hormone. So that's also going to affect your weight.

So let's figure out how much carbohydrate you can have at every meal. How does carbohydrates affect you later on in the day. Some people have no problem eating carbohydrates at breakfast and lunch, but eating it at dinner is a problem. Some people, that's not how it works, they need to eat their carbohydrate earlier in the day. So it just depends on your, digestive system.

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How intuitive eating works with nutrition

So even though there's a prescription for eating, it's still intuitive to you and your life and your cycle. You know, what is going on with you. So, let's make that fit.

Myrna: To me, Intuitive Eating, is eating following your preferred diet and maybe tweaking it a little bit. Because either you're, diabetic, or you're not, or you want to build muscle, or lose weight etc. So, prescriptive eating, is what you would counsel someone to do, like a meal plan.

Vanessa: Whatever your goal is, maybe your goal is that you just want a better relationship with food. So okay. that's different than you have type two, diabetes, and we need to control your blood sugar. So I'd probably lean more prescriptive if I need to control your blood sugar.

Intuitive eating, is just following your normal diet. If you're from the Mediterranean or Caribbean Islands, intuitive Eating, is just honoring your body and, how you feel during the day nothing is off limits. We can eat whatever we want, we just have to understand how the food is affecting our body.

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PTWWN TV – Nutrition- The Role of a Dietician 

Contemplating weight loss is not doing the work

Myrna: You say that understanding what we eat is influenced by many factors. social, emotional, and psychological. So, talk to me about that. How those modalities fit into someone's, diet plan, for, weight loss?

Vanessa: People go between contemplative and action, they vacillate between the two often, and so it's our job as, dietitian, to recognize that, and really meet people where they where they are.  Because if they think that they're in action mode, but really, they're in contemplative or pre contemplative mode, they will not be successful achieving their goals. It's our job to help them understand where there are in the process. If I give you, diet plans, and every week you have excuses why you didn't complete them you are in the contemplative state, so let's step back.

Because we don't want you to feel negatively about this experience, or that you're not able to achieve your, weight loss, goals you're just not ready. And that's okay. So those are like those psychological components. And psychological and behavior, they sort of go hand in hand. And that's a big piece of this. We need to really understand our patients, how they behave, why they behave in the way, and how we can support them, so that they can achieve success.

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Your history with food

What is your relationship with food? How were you treated as a child? How do you feel around food? How were you first introduced to food? Do you know, what are your preconceived notions about food? Those things are also important.

Myrna: So you're talking about someone coming to see you, and they have a goal, either to be healthier, or they have an illness, like cancer, or even, something like Crohn's disease. So there's certain foods that they can't eat. So, when that person comes to you, you work with them on their social, I'm assuming that social means they go out a lot, eat fast food or not drinking water. Emotional, maybe their relationships. Some people eat when they are lonely or heartbroken etc. And I guess the psychological is are you ready to do the work to make a change?

I know someone who is overweight and his wife is always trying to get him to to pay attention to his weight and food, but he's not there yet. He doesn't have what it takes to to make that commitment to eat healthier.

Transform your Mind Stitcher
Transform your Mind Stitcher

Weight isn't a predictor of mortality

Vanessa: Yeah, he's not ready if people are constantly talking about his, weight, then that's the thing for him. So this happens to a lot of people, I'm just using him because I know. But I do know that I see a lot of people that are overweight, and you're thinking, Well, why aren't they doing something about it?

They'll say, oh, that's healthy, or unhealthy? And then you're going to get sick at some point in time? Well, I think people are not ready. I mean, we know that, weight, isn't necessarily a predictor of morbidity and mortality, and some people choose to live in a larger body. And they're happy with that. And so that's that.

So we just, we recognize that and we noticed that it's not a one size fits all. And sometimes you just have to say to people, Hey, let's not let's talk about the, weight. You came here because your, cholesterol, is elevated. But we have to do things to make the, cholesterol, go down. So, I want to change the way that you eat in these ways.

Podbean Transform your Mind Podcast

Cholesterol reduction plan from your dietician

Your current diet is that you don't eat breakfast, and then at night you over eat cookies. Let's come up with something that you will eat that's really easy and accessible. Let's say it's an English muffin with peanut butter for breakfast. You eat that for breakfast that every single day for three months and you only eat two cookies at night. I promise you your, weight, will have gone down and your lab will have gone down.

You can also lower your, cholesterol, if you had chia seeds or some berries, with almond milk, that would actually keep you full. And that's upping the fiber content, because fiber helps to draw, cholesterol, away from the body.

Meal plan:
  • two tablespoons of chia seeds,
  • one quarter cup of oats,
  • half a cup of berries, you'd probably be somewhere in the vicinity of 15 grams of fiber. And that's only at breakfast.
  • add vegetables at lunch and dinner,
  • and another piece of fruit paired with a fat like nuts, you would get to about 30 grams of fiber. If we focus on 30 grams of fiber every single day, that's will lower your, cholesterol. You don't have to eat oats, but it's just a quick vehicle for the fiber.

Additional Resources

How to Maintain Sustainable Weight Loss

Health is Wealth: How to lose weight without Dieting

Health is wealth, If you don’t have your, health, no amount of wealth can buy it. A healthy, weight, is an indication of health so today we are talking about, how to lose weight, without dieting.

Listen to full interview here:


Health is Wealth 

Think about it. Most of us dream about becoming wealthy but would you trade your ability to walk for a million dollars? I know I wouldn’t.

The second way we could look at the phrase, health is wealth, is that you can be healthy but poor and still be happy. On the flip side, you can have copious amounts of wealth,  but if you don’t have your, health, you  would willingly trade all your money to feel good or be healthy again.

So the message in this, health is wealth, series is, You can't just trash your body and then try to alleviate the evidence of disease.

Download on Spotify

Healthy Weight Loss

Health, is not the absence of disease, disease is the absence of, health.

What is, health? According to the dictionary, health, is fitness of body or mind, and freedom from disease or ailment. It can be body fitness, or mental fitness.

What is wealth? In the same dictionary the meaning of, wealth, is stated as “a great quantity of money, valuable possessions, property, or other riches.

So in the first episode of this series we and going to unpack how your, health is your wealth,.  To start off this series, our  topic today is “How to Lose Weight, without dieting”

How to Lose Weight when you Have an Eating Disorder

Myrna – Dr Nina. What led you to do this work?

At a very young age, I suddenly and randomly developed an obsession with my size. I thought that my thighs should be thinner and I thought if my thighs were smaller, I would be perfect. By the way, I was a perfectly normal weight.  But I became convinced that thinner legs would somehow make me better.  This obsession just got worse as I got older and by the time I was an adolescent,  I had full blown, eating disorder.  My last thought at night was what did I eat today.  I would fall asleep counting the calories and fat grams of my food intake for the day and figuring how to, lose weight, 

The scale was my most welcome friend and my biggest enemy, it ruled my life.  So much so that when I went hiking with friends or did anything fun like dancing,  I would focus on how many calories I was burning instead of how much fun I was having.  I would be calculating how, to loose weight, 

Getting Therapy to Help Lose Weight 

I would restrict restrict myself of food and then eventually I would binge and then purge.   So finally I went to therapy.  I  would open up with my therapist about every aspect of my life except one, I never ever told her what was going on with me and food.  I went to my therapist once a week for three years and I never talked about what was going with my. eating disorders. 

 After some time in therapy, I became aware of my feelings.  I learned to process my emotions rather than to deny them.  I learned to use words to comfort myself instead of using words to criticize myself.  By the time I left therapy, I had zero, eating disorder, or, anorexia,  issues and No unhealthy relationship to food. The amazing thing about this is that not once did I ever talked about food to my therapist.  When I fixed my emotional issues, I fixed my, anorexia.  So the answer to the question How to, lose weight, without, dieting, is first learning how to process your emotions instead of stuffing them down with food. 

People ask me all the time. How did you recover from three, eating disorders, that consumed your life without ever talking about it?  How is that possible?  The answer is that whatever was going on with food and my, eating disorders, was a symptom of the actual problem, not the problem.  When I  learned different ways of coping with what was going on with me, I cured my, eating disorders including, anorexia.  

How to, lose weight, by understanding why you eat certain finds of foods 

 I developed this formula to help people figure out you know what is eating them out.  

  • If you like creamy foods like ice cream or frozen yogurt or pudding. It suggests a longing for comfort or nurturing. Limit your exposure to these foods to, lose weight,. 
  • If you like foods that like bread, pasta, cake, pizza those are correlated to loneliness since they are  bulky and they symbolically filling an internal void.  Fill your internal void by finding a hobby. Doing something you like instead of eating. It will help you to, lose weight, 
  • Finally, foods  that are crunchy like chips or pretzels, anything with a crunch suggest you are angry. Dealing with your anger in a healthy way will help you to, lose weight. 

 The best way to deal with the triggers of emotional eating is try to understand where they're coming from.  It is the first step. The next step is to deal with those an underlying feelings of lack of self worth. 

  • How do you see yourself? 
  • How do you feel your loneliness? 
  • How do you express your anger?  
  • How do you deal with what you are feeling? 

Weight Loss Tips 

Nurture  yourself with words instead of ice cream.  If you use mean words to describe yourself and then you nurture yourself with food, it becomes a viscous cycle. You eat the ice cream and you call yourself nasty words for being so weak, then you eat again to comfort yourself.  

When you feel good about yourself it's easier to be good to yourself.  

Self acceptance is the key. 

The most practical thing that you can do, is to throw out your scale. It is a tyrant, it does not measure your value, it ruins your day. It has too much power over you,  so getting it out of your life is a very powerful stance that you can take on your own behalf. 

Download to listen to the rest of this powerful interview and learn five main reasons for diet sabotage.

Download and subscribe to hear all episodes in this series. 

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Additional Resources

How to Reprogram your Mind to Stop Binge Eating