Pinterest, exists for people to come together to gather, collect and share snapshots of their own ideas, memories, and interests. In the early days of the, social network, platform, that was all Pinterest, really was. A simple place for people to come together and scrapbook. It was a collectively personal experience that gave the world something nice. Today it is necessary for your, online marketing strategy.
This week on the Mindset Transformation radio show and podcast with Coach Myrna, I interview Online business coach Jessie Guilford. Jessie is a marketing expert and she will teach us the top “Seven Social Media Tools to Grow your, digital marketing, Business including, Pinterest
These days, Pinterest, is more than just a nice global scrapbook. With 100 million active users (emphasis on the “active”), it’s now being used by some of the biggest companies on the planet to build awareness, drive traffic to their websites, and sell.
Pinterest, is popular with users because it allows them to choose how to interact with brands and businesses — not the other way around. Users can navigate based on their own interests so product endorsements aren’t quite as invasive here as in other social media platforms.
Most people on, Pinterest, are actually looking to make purchases, which means brands are only really guiding their products to the people who need them.
Jessie grew up on a grain & cattle farm in Manitoba, Canada with a passion for the outdoors, horseback riding, shopping and creating the life she desired. She graduated University with her Bachelor of Business Degree and achieved the Duke of Edinburgh’s Program Gold Award before entering the corporate world. She worked in Research as well as Sales + Marketing while starting and running her own website design business at the age of 22. Realizing that the 9-5, slowly-climb-the-corporate-ladder world was not for her, she soon realized her passion for coaching amazing women from all over the world to help them achieve their business goals and build a life they loved.
What are 3 things to think about before starting an online marketing business?
What Type of Products Can I Sell Online?
How to Source and Manufacture Products for Your, online marketing, Business
Driving Traffic to Your Online Store
Online marketing, is necessary to build your, digital marketing, empire.
Top eight social media tools that will help with people’s online marketing and business growth?
SocialPilot – social media marketing, tool that allows you to effortlessly schedule, plan, publish, and analyze your social media posts.
HootSuite – social media marketing, tool that gives a birds eye view of your social media performance mainly for enterprises
MavSocial – social media marketing, tool that helps make better use of visual content in your posts
Buzzsumo – social media marketing, tool that allows you to identify and analyze content that engages your, target market
SproutSocial – social network, tool that is best suited for enterprises and large agencies
Leadfuze – social media, tool great for lead prospecting
Taboola – social media, tool that helps promote your best content on social media
Audiense – social media marketing, tool that enables digging out actionable user insights from social media platforms
“What do you do?” – example your cocktail pitch from Pinterest
To fund the startup, CEO Silbermann approached several investors who turned him away because of the economic climate. Pinterest, now reaches 250 million people and the New York Times reported that it will reach about $700 million in annual ad revenue this year and is valued at $12.3 billion.
“So you could say, ‘Hey, you know, we don’t have any money. We don’t have any experience doing this. But we think this is a good idea. We’re going to build this piece of software.’ And I couldn’t understand why they weren’t funding us, but it was probably the worst sales pitch they’d ever heard,” Silbermann said on an episode of Business Insider’s podcast “This Is Success.”
After a while, Silbermann said he became “pretty desperate” for funding and found a New York University business-plan competition. Silbermann entered, Pinterest, even though he was not an NYU student and won second place — he was awarded a meeting with a venture capitalist who agreed to put up half of Pinterest’s first round of funding.
How can people get visible and find their target market on Pinterest?
If you plan to niche down to a very targeted market, on, Pinterest, you should be asking anybody who comes to your site what other things they might be interested in reading about. Serving your audience increases the probability of them sticking around, signing up for your email list, and following you on social media should be a part of your, digital marketing strategy.
These are the strategies I deem necessary for your, online marketing strategy.
1. Personal branding online marketing strategy
Successful businesses can generate a ton of momentum from successful entrepreneurs who lead them. Branding yourself, before your company, gives you the opportunity to leverage a more trustworthy, personal image to promote your brand.
It also gives you more power to meet and network with others, form more partnerships and lend a face to your otherwise faceless organization. And it’s free to do, from a monetary perspective, though you will need to invest a significant amount of time.
2. Content marketing online marketing strategy
Content marketing, takes a variety of forms, and depending on how you form your, online marketing strategy, could accomplish a number of different goals. For example, you could use white papers, ebooks and other long-form content to attract downloads, signups and conversions, or you could use an on-site blog to attract more inbound traffic to your site.
You could even use content as a form of help and troubleshooting, or some combination of these applications. Content marketing, is incredibly versatile and useful, and, if it’s valuable, your customers will expect you to have at least some of it in place for them.
Every so often, a new social media platform emerges to capture our attention (Peach) or become part of our daily lives (Snapchat).
The, social media tools, landscape can be just as fascinating — and robust!
Every week, people build and launch new social media tools, empowering us marketers in our day-to-day work. To give you a sense of how amazing the landscape is, here’s a graphic of some of the, social media tools, available: social media management, listening, analyzing, content creation, and more.
What happens when the vision ends? dealing with failure. In November 2016, most of the country was left in shock when Donald Trump won the general elections, because he did not win the popular vote. Hilary Clinton , failed, at her bid once again to become the first woman president of the United States of America. This was the second time an non established candidate knocked her off the podium. What was the cause of this, failure? I understand Hilary had a hard time, dealing with failure. Why did a woman who has been in politics for over 50 years, been the wife of a great president, founder of a great charitable foundation that provides vaccines for millions of poor children around the world, a champion for the people, lose to a man with no political experience, thinks that some people are superior to some because of their religion, sex and disability?
Was this, failure, because first and foremost she is a woman? It is harder, dealing with failure, when you lost because you are a woman.
In Numbers 27 we see the daughters of Zelophehad, challenging an age-old law that said the women could not inherit the land. In those days’ women were not even counted as part of the church congregation. This was the pre-CHRIST era. Yet today we are still fighting for women’s rights.
Millions of men and women in the United States of America voted for Donald J Trump because he is a white male. One of my followers on Facebook posted that Hilary couldn’t run the country because she is a woman!
Let’s bring this discussion closer to home. Specifically, your home.
What happens when you have a clear, vision, that you worked on every day for most of your life and you fail to realize it time and time again? How do you, deal with failure? The bible says “Let us not grow weary while doing good, for in due season we shall reap if we do not lose heart.” Refuse to be deterred by opinions, policies, and traditions. Do you become disheartened, dealing with failure? God can change the minds and hearts of the populist. What he did for the daughters of Zelophehad, he can do for Hilary Clinton and he can do for you. We can, overcome failure, by keeping the, vision, in front of you and get back up every time you get knocked down.
5 things you can do after, failure, of a goal, company, dream, marriage etc.
1: Watch your Thoughts
Most of us do not understand the power of our thoughts.
Dealing with failure, our thoughts are the highest energy frequency, and has the power to attract like thoughts floating around in the energy vortex. If you don’t watch your thoughts and consciously send back the negative thoughts that make you feel bad, you will experience, failure, for sure. Before you know it you would be a powerful magnet attracting every like thought that comes into range. Keep this up and soon you will be like a hot air balloon that is too filled with poop to take off!
2: Find the good in the situation is another tip to, dealing with failure
“Nothing is either good or bad but thinking makes it so.”
Brian Webb author of “Don’t Give Up, don’t ever give up“ shares his story in his book with that name and is great advice for, dealing with failure.
One day he had a headache like he had never felt before, extremely intense, he felt like he needed to throw up so he went to the bathroom. While in the bathroom he and passed out. He woke up 3 days later from a coma to find out that a blood vessel had ruptured in his brain. He could no longer walk or talk. He realized that life as he knew it, was over.
Doctors predicted that he would never be able to walk, drive a car or live independently again.
Three months later he was released from the hospital. He couldn’t talk, walk, or work. In fact, there was a lot of things he couldn’t do. But he decided to focus on what he could do instead. You heard the saying. When life gives you lemons, or, failure? You make lemonade! Well he decided to make some lemonade.
There is good in every situation, we live in a world of contrast. Nothing exists without its opposite. Find the good in your situation.
Brian decided to focus on fitness.
With the help of his therapist he began to exercise. He began learning to walk again. When he fell down, or experienced, failure, he would get back up. Walking turned to running. This man who could not walk a year ago, now became a marathon runner! I am in perfect physical health and I can’t even run a 5K race without stopping and I would guess this would be true for most of you listening. What makes some people hold a vision in front of them and don’t take failure as an option, while others give up after the first try?
Why is Brian’s story so inspirational? Because of his way of, dealing with failure. He turned his, failure, into triumph. He decided to focus on what he could do instead of what he couldn’t do, and with practice and time, changed his life trajectory. He walked again, talked again, ran again and worked again! What do you need to get back on? I can promise you that if you work at it, you will succeed.
Where there is a will, there is always a way.
3: Change the momentum after Failure
I love Abraham by Ester Hicks. I was listening to one of her videos a few months back and someone in her workshop asked her why he kept attracting negative experiences even though he was conscious about his energy vortex and made conscious effort to clean up his vortex. Your vortex is your energy frequency or your aura.
Abraham’s response was to explain momentum. Ever heard the saying:
The worst it gets, the worst it gets, and the better it gets, the better it gets?
That is all about momentum. If you think bad thoughts and feel bad, then you attract more, failure. The only way to stop the negative spiral of, failure, or negative momentum is to find something about the situation to be grateful for.
Let’s say you are Nick Vujicic and you were born with no arms and no legs. Can you think of a worst fate? You are totally dependent on someone to bath you, feed you, and wipe your butt, for the rest of your life. He can’t even hug his wife. Yet Nick is one of the happiest people you will ever meet. He found many things to be grateful for and because his vortex is full of positive momentum, he attracts great things. He travels all around the world getting paid to speak and motivate others. He has a beautiful wife and son. He learned to swim, use his toes as his hand and do lots of things people with hands and feet take for granted.
The thing about momentum is that it resets itself while you are asleep and is great for, dealing with failure. When you sleep, your spirit leaves your body in much the same way it does when your body dies. So, you have to deliberately keep the negative momentum going by thinking negative thoughts when you wake up in the morning. One way to change the momentum is to develop the practice of thinking of things you are grateful for before bed and on rising. The other is to find something in the situation to be grateful for. In the case of Hilary Clinton. She could be grateful that she will not speed up her aging by 20 years in the time span of 4 years. We all see what that job does to Presidents! It is a time warp!
4: Look for an alternate way to serve, what is your plan B?
I was watching Oprah, another of my favorite people, on Super Soul Sunday a few months back and this very inspirational story was showcased.
This story was about this boy now man who had a, vision, from God when he was 10 years old of swinging his daughter around while she was laughing hysterically. He even got her name in his vision, Cloe. He held this, vision, to his heart dearly and never doubted for a moment that this, vision, would come true and that one day he would have a daughter just like he saw. Cloe had olive skin and brown eyes.
In his early 20’s, he started dating and subsequently fell in love with his childhood friend who was blond with fair skin and blue eyes. Having the vision of his daughter clearly in his mind, he didn’t think that this was the woman God intended for him to marry, because she could not be the mother of a child with olive skin and brown eyes.
One day they were sitting in his car discussing the future and started talking about children. His girlfriend told him that she wanted a daughter and that she would like to name her Cloe. He couldn’t believe it.
Would you have liked to be a fly on the wall when they both discovered that they were meant to be together, because God gave them both the same dream! Halelewa!
He knew that this was the girl that God chose for him to marry.
They got married and immediately started trying to have a family, they couldn’t wait to meet Cloe; but nothing happened. Four years passed, six years passed. The pain was deep from this, failure. How could God give them both a, vision, that failed. How could he be so cruel. For a time, they both became separated from God. They no longer believed. But their faith returned!
The obvious next choice was adoption but they both rejected that option at first. They both wanted their own child. They wanted the baby girl named Cloe. They thought adoption was putting a band aid over their pain.
Finally, after many years of, dealing with failure, they made the mindset shift and decided to adopt a baby. They found an alternative way to fulfill their purpose of being parents.
They waited for some time for the right fit. Months passed before they received an email that a pregnant mother had chosen them to be parents of her unborn child. She was giving it up for adoption. She was also having a girl!
There were exhilarated! Finally, they were going to be parents of a baby girl. They started choosing a name. Cloe was off the table. Cloe was the name of the baby girl God had intended for them to have. This baby girl was not the vision that God had given both of them.
They decided to meet the mother of their new baby girl and get to know her. They drove to her home and when she opened the door, the man noticed that she looked like a grown-up version of the little girl named Cloe that he saw when he was 10 years old. Same olive skin, same features, same eyes. When they sat down to visit with the mother. She asked them if they had a name picked out for the baby. She told them she had a name and she hoped they would keep it. Can you guess what it was? I am sure 100% of you listening would guess right. Cloe.
Still gives me chills. I don’t know what will be Hilary’s path, history will let us know but I know for sure that if the, vision, comes from God, there is never, failure.
5: Remember that there are several routes to your destination if you experience failure
Don’t get tied to a particular path. God is like your GPS navigation system, he can take the fastest route, the scenic route, he can bypass the city and construction zones; but he will get you to your destination. God gave this couple a, vision, that they will be parents of a baby girl named Cloe. He never showed them a vision of the wife being pregnant or delivering a baby. They added that little piece. He showed the man a, vision, of him playing with a daughter named Cloe. He showed him the destination.
If you believe that your, vision, is from God, then when you experience, failure, you would refuse to be deterred. You would not grow weary and disheartened. In, dealing with failure, you would look for an open door, you would look for the lesson so that you can be better prepared for the next battle. You would never quit until you WIN or you DIE. God said in the bible “I know the plans I have for you, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future” So hear this, if you have failed in something, know that it is not the end!
As I wrap up this post from the Transform Your Mind radio show and podcast. Today I have been coaching on “When The Vision Fails: 5 Things you can do after a failure.” I hope you gleamed something and had a few aha moments. If you have experienced failure, I hope you were encouraged to get up and try again.
You can listen again to this broadcast and any of my previous shows by downloading then on iTunes.
Please remember to subscribe and leave a review.
If you would like to contact me for personal coaching or to be a guest on this radio show and podcast please contact me on the web @ www.myrnayounghelps.com
Valeri Bocage lost everything in hurricane Katrina and used her pain to create her company Powerful Women International. She believes that the greater your pain the greater things that are birthed from this pain. In the, WandaVision, prequel, Vision, was, well, very dead. … Wanda eventually managed to destroy the Mind Stone – and, Vision, – but Thanos turned back time and plucked it out anyway. Both outcomes killed, Vision.
Valerie says that whenever you focus on what you have lost, you can never move forward. Her purpose was to make a difference.
She says to figure out who your audience is. Who are you supposed to make a difference to?
My tip of the week is:
How to Create Positive Core Beliefs
Our guest today shared her story of losing everything in hurricane Katrina and bouncing back to become the CEO of Powerful Women International. To do that she had to have positive self-worth and positive, core beliefs. Beliefs are the truths people hold on to that guide our life. The power of belief can trap you, as in the belief that you deserve only a limited amount of happiness. Or belief can free you, as in the belief that you are safe and protected in the cosmic plan.
When you open your awareness to your strongest, core beliefs, which are known as, core beliefs, two things happen. First, you find out who you are and why you behave in the ways you do. Second, new energies become available when you pursue the, core beliefs, that are life-supporting, fulfilling, and spiritually transforming.
A powerful, core belief, is pure and direct. It gives you a clear sense of who you are. It isn’t confused, conflicted, or compromised. Let’s take steps to make this the kind of, core belief, you are activating. Step one is to bring your, core beliefs, into awareness. The four, core beliefs, you want to activate are:
I am loving and lovable.
I am worthy.
I am safe and trusting.
I am fulfilled and whole.
You already have existing, core beliefs, in these four areas of love, self-worth, security, and fulfillment. Your beliefs can’t be changed simply by throwing out an old one and adopting a new one like changing your wardrobe. The change must come at the level of self-awareness. At the core of your being, where your true self resides, the truth about you is clear and unequivocal: You deserve unconditional love; you are of unique worth in the universe; you can trust Nature to protect and uphold you; and your fulfillment comes from being whole.
To overhaul your beliefs means that you get closer and closer to your core beliefs, these four inner truths, which are absolute. Right now, there’s a gap between them and what you experience. For most people, the positive and negative side of their core beliefs depend on how good or bad their experiences have been in the past. If you have been deeply hurt in love, for example, it is hard to adopt the core belief that you deserve infinite love.
A Self-Awareness Exercise to Create Your Core Beliefs
Hawkeye on , WandaVision, is self aware that he is the weakest link. Although he is an extremely skilled marksman, Clint Barton is often considered to be the weakest Avenger seeing as he’s just a regular guy with a bow and arrow. Reliving experiences from the past only keeps you stuck in the past. Your core beliefs are activated in the now, every day. They can only be changed in the now! Here’s how:
Look upon what’s happening now as a reflection of your, core beliefs. If the reflection is negative, pause and ask yourself why it fits the storyline your beliefs create. If you experience any kind of abusive treatment, for example, this reflects a victimhood story supported by a core belief that keeps you in the story. If you experience unexpected kindness, on the other hand, this reflects a storyline that includes compassion and reflects a core belief in how much you deserve love.
A, core belief, that God has plans to prosper you, will take you through any setback.
• Valeri Bocage started Powerful Women International in 2006 after moving to San Francisco, a move that was prompted by the loss of everything during Hurricane Katrina in New Orleans. Valeri lost everything except her indomitable spirit to help others. Initially, Powerful Women International was formed to help women live their dreams and to begin to support each other worldwide to fulfill their utmost dreams and expand themselves as leaders worldwide.
How did Valerie build and assemble her Power teams?
Power Team, is a team consisting of people who possess all the strengths needed to achieve your mission. They are an extension of you not a mirror.
You’ve thought about your, power team, and created an ideal customer profile based on that aspiration. The same thing should be done as you prepare to build your, power team, members.
As you make a list of your, power team, you’ll need an:
social media manager,
public relations manager,
customer service representatives
This is the time to aim high; to refuse to settle for less-than-ideal.
With her, Power Team, by her side, Valerie was able to take her brand to more people, with greater positive impact. Too many brand builders work to simply fill positions, when they should be working to hire those people who will further the reach and value of their brands. Who will you hire next? What challenges are you experiencing whilst hiring? What difference your, Power Team, made.
Millennials, need parents teaches or coaches to stimulate their, personal development. Millennials, need to understand that, personal development, comes when they anticipate the very next phase beyond the one there’re in, so they can be prepared for it when it arrives.
Introduction to, Personal Development for, Millennials
Today what we want to focus on is giving, Millennials, some clarity on, personal growth and development. We both know that learning should not stop when we leave school. My guest today is Arika Pierce author of the book The Millennial’s Playbook to Adulting.
Myrna – What advice would you give, Millennials, on, personal growth? Millennials, are in the growth stage of life, what advice would you give them? I know in your book you give ten tips. We don’t have time to talk on all ten, personal development, tips; but pick some of the top ones and share how you would advise, Millennials, on, personal growth and development.
Arika- I think especially after you get out of school, Millennials, are sort of over trying to learn from textbooks. People are just exhausted from that textbook and learning from your professors and things like that; So I do encourage, Millennials, to become students of life.
By that I mean opening your eyes to all the things that you can learn from different people, new experiences just being open to continuing to stretch your horizon and to be multifaceted and to be just a well-rounded person. In my book, for example:
I suggest things such as reading biographies about people that you’re curious about for, personal development, or maybe who you want to know. Learn more about their path.
I also believe that you should do things like watch documentaries on Netflix about different types of topics that you might be interested in or just want to know more about.
I also think listening to podcasts that’s huge for, personal development, and that’s why I love your podcast. I listen to podcast really throughout my day on various types of topics, it could be something around, personal development, by expanding your mindset, it could be something around the news, it could be anything. There’s so much out there that you can really stretch your mind and learn.
Going to different types of events. I always tell people if you get invited, go to something and especially if it’s something that you probably would be interested in doing. Go to the Opera, go to a hockey game even though you don’t know what’s going on, go to a book talk, go to a wine tasting, whatever it is just expand your horizon and, personal development.
Learning does not stop once you walk across the stage. You should always every day be learning more about yourself, about life, about other people, just always be curious and be a student of the world and of life.
Myrna – Awesome, that’s some good advice I love the podcast one because that’s a big one. I actually showed my mom just yesterday how to put podcasts on her phone.
That’s the space that we’re in right now. I will tell you I started listening to podcast just to learn what some of the successful podcasters are doing. If there’s something you want to learn, you go to an event, you go to book signing. That’s why people write books. You can take ten years to learn something or you can take ten minutes to read how someone else did it in a book, and that’s the purpose of books.
I wanted to learn how to be better at what I do, so I started listening to podcast. You would not believe how my mind has been expanded. I subscribe to TuneIn radio, so that I can research how that works and what Hot Talk radio was all about. I happened to come across the Hay House World Summit podcast and you would not believe what I’ve been learning.
I listen to podcasts every morning when I walk. I walk for an hour every day, so I that’s my learning time and I my eyes are wide open because this podcast have guest speakers all the top people in the spirituality and consciousness and health space.
I try to bring good content on this show so that people can plug in and hear something inspiring and mindset shifting. This podcast is not all about shooting the breeze. I went through your book and I made a note of some of the things that you mentioned and I’ll mention a couple of them because it’s very important you talked about:
How Millennials can Shift their mindset for, personal development
• Keeping your mind healthy. You start off by talking about depression. Depression is very big right now. I don’t know where it’s coming from, but a lot of people are depressed, even the ones that you think should be happy, that has a lot of money. Still trouble with depression. You start out by saying, keep your mind healthy and that’s very important when you talk about staying motivated.
• Find a healthy outlet. Journaling, painting, baking, etc and stuff like that that keeps your mind healthy. I talked about journaling, I think it’s great but it’s not for everybody. I think you know it’s not something some people can do it every single day, some people just do it on a periodic basis. I believe don’t be hard on yourself about doing it, but if sometimes you need a place to get your thoughts get your feelings out thinking on paper can honestly be a great way to do that.
• Getting into healthy routines. I just wrote a blog that’s coming out next week about a morning routine. I think establishing a morning routine is a great, personal development, tool and can help you set the intention and tone for the rest of your day and so actually think sitting down and thinking about what you want your routine to be and doing it that could be transformative. I’ve just recently sort of created a new morning routine and it really has changed my mindset for the whole day. Just making sure there are these five or six things that I do before I start my day.
That’s awesome, you know again as you talk my mind goes to certain things and I was just listening to a podcast where Barbara Corrigan was speaking and we all know her from Shark Tank. She has done a lot for herself, she said something that I did as a little variation for what you just said. She said write down the things that you like to do and write down the things you don’t like to do and instead of trying to do the things you don’t like to do, and then find an assistant or an intern and delegate the things you don’t like to do.
If you’re still trying to just figure out what direction you want to go in life, I think that’s a great time to get it to get a, Life coach. Honestly I think the hardest part is just identifying what exactly you need the, Life coach, for sometimes you want the, Life coach, to help you with your, personal development plan, in terms of where you want to take your career.
Sometimes it could be helping you balance your work versus your personal life. You might need a, Life coach just in terms of helping you get to the next level of your dreams and, self improvement. There’s all different types of ways you can leverage and use a, Life coach. I really think that it’s never too soon to do that.
Today, there’s lots of, Life coaches who focus on the, millennial, generation, which I think is great. I think those people really understand what the, millennials, are going through and can really help them work through all of those challenges. I wasn’t focused on the, millennial, generation until I recognized that my daughter being a, millennial, and her struggles and the things that she needs help with and then I put them two and two together.
I thought what there’s lots of people in that bucket that could do maybe good guidance and direction. Yeah so you’re right, I haven’t come across a lot of, millennial, coaches; but I know that, Millennials, are the generation that’s moving the bucket in a lot of areas. That’s because they’re a large group, they’re the movers and the shakers.
So as we continue our discussion on, personal development, as a, millennial, I want to ask this question. In your book Arika, you give advice on how to care for your body so how can we incorporate caring for your body with, personal growth and development?
Personal Growth and Development as a Millennial
I believe that when you work on your mind, when you strengthen your mind, a lot of that has to also be your body and soul, they’re all connected. When you are taking care of yourself when you’re eating right, when you’re exercising, I believe your mind is just in a different place. You feel those endorphins, everything is flowing. I had a workout this morning where I came up with three different things while I was working out that I wanted to incorporate.
When you feel good you just can really, transform your mindset, in a very positive way. I believe that when you are you believe that you’re invincible, and start taking care of yourself, eating right, making sure you’re drinking enough water, making sure that you know you’re working out on a regular basis, making sure you’re meditating, when all of those are aligned I believe that your life in terms of what you want to do, in terms of having the energy to do them, all falls into a, personal development plan. You get into the, personal growth and development, space. But you can’t take your body for granted, because we actually only get one and you know if your body isn’t right usually everything else isn’t right either.
That’s awesome, I was listening I was listening to Louise Hay, she was talking about something that she calls the mirror work. She says is that women especially should go in front of the
mirror every day when they wake up, when they look their worst and they should say to themselves, “ I love you, you are so awesome.” I have no problem with self-love, I love myself, but I still do it every morning. I look myself in the eye and I say “I love you you’re awesome.” What she’s trying to do with that little exercise is bring exactly what you’re talking about the mind-body connection. Millennials, have a problem with self love.
Millennials, and Self Love
When you love the body that you’re in, when you love you, then it transcends into every area of your life, it transcends into your, self confidence, it transcends into what you put in your body, how you treat it, how you let people treat you. There’s definitely a correlation with exercise into listening and connecting to your higher self. I wrote my entire first book and it was called ironically “Becoming Conscious, my Awakening” be connecting with my higher self.
I would go for run in the morning and all the words would come to me. I would go to the car right after and start writing. I will tell you if I tried if I tried to circumvent and write at night or something it wouldn’t go as smooth, because then I’ll be trying to force it, but when it just comes to me it came to me when I was running, the words just flowed.
Like when you were exercising this morning. So the mind-body connection is very important, and that’s why I decided to include it in our topic today, because a lot of people do not care for their body and especially when they’re young, millennials, and they don’t have any aches and pains, they kind of ignore it.
I was listening to another podcast just yesterday again on the Hay House World Summit and listened to Ocean Robbins, I love his name, I told my daughter she has to name my grandchild Ocean. He is actually is the grandson of Baskin Robbins and he had an incredible story about how his grandfather ate ice cream all day long, he had at least 21 flavors in his fridge at all times.
He ate ice cream for breakfast and lunch! When he got to 70 years old, he had all these health problems because of the diet that he had all his life. He had heart problems but his story ended well, because started eating well, he started doing certain things, eating well, including cutting out ice cream and he was still able to turn it around. That’s not an encouragement for anybody listening to wait until they’re in their 70’s and in poor health to get started on a, personal development plan, for a healthy lifestyle, but do it now.
How, Millennials, develop a, Personal Development Plan: Jim Rohn
Most, Millennials, are in school, I think a lot of, Millennials, go on to higher education. They’re working on feeding their mind and, personal growth, education and career and things like that. The reason I talked about, personal growth, because as a, Life coach, I know that there’s a difference. Jim Rohn’s personal development growth plan, is a popular, personal development plan. Tony Robbins talks about Jim Rohn’s growth plan in his back story. I would like to hear your spin on the difference between studying for a career and actually, personal growth.
Arika – When we think about, personal growth and development, as you just said that that’s very connected to what you are focused on career-wise, your job. I think when you start to think about what you want to personally achieve for yourself, that may or may not be connected to your professional life, because there definitely is some overlap between the two.
I think really people just have to always think about looking inside and how do they define themselves, outside of their career. Millennials, you’re thinking about how you want to define yourself as a person and defining yourself as a person is not just what your career is and so it’s very easy to get into a life pattern. You only focus and your own the only thing that you know to that you gravitate to in terms of your growth, in terms of your brand.
When you ask “What is your, personal development plan” which is now something I heard from Brian Tracy he talks about you know spending all his money when he was a youngster to purchase something that called a, personal growth, plan. If I was to ask a, Millennial, they might answer in terms of there career trajectory. But that is not a, personal development, plan because it’s only it is only touching on one area of a multi-faceted spiritual being.
Deepak Chopra is one of the people that I follow and I love, he talks about asking “who are you?” who is the person that’s doing the listening right now? You ask yourself these questions “Who am I?” “What am I here to do?” You just ask God that question and even let God answer. Your, personal development plan links up to your purpose.
Learn different ways you can develop your, personal development, business, organization and, personal growth, skills.
Strategies for, personal development, can be found on the Transform Your Mind Podcast.
The 9th Principle taught in my book “Out of the Snares, a story of hope and encouragement” is Love.
Love. This 4 letter word is so powerful! and, self love, is this love turned inside.
Love including, self love is the most powerful force in the universe!
It can break the bonds of years, sometimes generations of, addictions, and, generational curses.
God’s Love for Humanity
God’s love, for humanity caused him to send his only begotten son Jesus to die for our sins so that we can have everlasting life.
A mother’s love, for her child gives her superhuman strength, to save her child from death or injury.
The love we have for our wife and husband keeps off stress and diseases when that love is active and healthy.
You see when we are in the throes of our love experiences, we look at the world through rose colored glasses.
Everything is sunny. We stop to smell the roses.
Our hearts beat faster when our loved ones are near.
We ride the energy waves of this spiritual connection and in turn we feel energized, we smile and laugh more and we don’t sweat the small stuff!
The energy of love combined with, sexual energy, is even more powerful!
When you transmute, sexual energy, for the person you love, you can create or imagine life changing books, companies and inventions that propel humanity forward!
In order for you to give love to another you must first have, self love, inside of you.
You have to love yourself, you have to love your world or the space you work and play in your world.
You have to love God, your creator.
When you have, self love, you gain, self confidence
Self-confidence is necessary for you to be successful in your career and in your business
Click the link below to hear a powerful story of how lack of self-confidence can ruin your world. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8J1ECHTnc64
Love doesn’t have to be the Notebook kind with grand gestures and sacrifice.
We love to watch movies like the Notebook about true love that never dies.
We are inspired by stories about Edward, Prince of Wales and Wallace Simpson and how he chose love over the throne; but most of us would settle for the simple acts of love.
This artist depicts these acts in her paintings so wonderfully and every couple should aspire to connect on this level.
• Who wouldn’t love their spouse coming up and giving them a hug while they are cooking in the kitchen?
• Who wouldn’t love their spouse watching chick flicks with them and enjoying it as much as they do?
• Who wouldn’t love going out for ice cream and licking each other ice cream cones and stealing a kiss?
• Who wouldn’t love just being in a room and just enjoying each other, laying on your husbands lap while you read a book?
• Who wouldn’t like coming home and seeing your husband with a apron on in the kitchen cooking dinner?
Who wouldn’t have, self love, after all this.
Love shouldn’t be only for your spouse, children, family and friends. Love should be for all relationships in and out of the workplace, with customers, suppliers, everyone!
Giving love and compassion to the people you work with yields immense, self love.
Here are 5 ways to be a LoveCat at work with, self love:
1. Greet everyone who walks into your office or room with eye contact and a smile.
2. Hug your close associates or people you have a personal relationship at work.
3. Replace the word Hate with the word, self love, whenever you can and watch it transform the energy.
4. Read lots of books and offer the knowledge gained from these books to your co-workers to help them with projects, initiatives or difficult personal situations.
5. Start a book club at work and have everybody share cliff notes from the books read.
All in all, self love, is like a boomerang, it always comes back so give it freely.
It is like seeds that blow in the wind. It does not always come back from the people we choose to love; but it always comes back
Check out my chapter on Love in my book “Out of the Snares” A story of hope and encouragement.
After competing for nearly four years as a professional golfer, he transitioned out of the world of golf into his new endeavors as coach.
Can you share your journey to becoming a professional golfer and how it marries to your life today as a coach, collaborator and podcaster. There must be a story in there why you actually give up golf, love to hear it.
My journey like everyone’s life and path is a journey. Journeys take lots of time and
usually involve lots of failure and mine is no doubt the same. I started playing golf when I was really young. My dad got me into it and I really enjoyed playing. I was a competitive kid so anything with competition in sports I was in.
In golf, there wasn’t anyone else responsible for your successes. Your path to, self-mastery, depends on only you. I felt like I had the most control in my success. As I progressed it became clear it was something that I could really build. My focus kind of narrowed on golf in high school. I started dropping other sports so that I could really focus on golf. I ended up playing in college at Masters University in California. I worked on, self-mastery, for four years in college.
It was clear that I had the skills to be a professional golfer. So I decided to give it a shot. In my senior year, I created the business plan and the structure around getting the financing to play professional golf. I got 10 to 11 sponsors and investors to back me. So when I graduated I was able to turn professional right away, upon leaving college in May of 2014. That kind of kicked off my four year journey of playing professional golf.
It takes a professional golfer about 10 years to get from, here to there, there being the PGA tour, and to self-mastery, the ultimate goal for every professional golfer. It’s not an overnight thing. There’s the people that you know, Tiger Woods, Jordan Spieth and Phil Mickelson and the 1% of the 1% the superstars. Everyone else it takes an average of 10 years to get from, here to there, and to, self-mastery,
My first year was a lot of failure, and a lot of learning. It was this process of development and, self-mastery, the process of learning how to develop and grow as a human very much at the same time.
As a golfer I started to learn to grow and improve and see some slow signs of growth and success. About two years into the journey after I’ve gotten partial status, I started to face a systemic injury which started in 2016. It was a muscle strain in my back. Many different factors combined and that kicked off about a year-and-a-half journey of failing to rehab correctly, failure of treating the symptom versus the injury. When I did reach the end of those first three and a half years, it became clear that my body wasn’t 100 % healed.
But the bigger thing that happened was at my desires and giftings and abilities had kind of shown a different purpose. I felt more called to coach, so I made the decision this last December to transition out of Golf.
I truly believe what I’m doing now is my purpose. I believe that golf equipped me for my true purpose. I think that the journey of professional golf was a hyper-focused form of personal development and, self-mastery, because golf again is an arena where at the end of the day you have to take 100% ownership of your career, your life and your success because there’s no one to blame but yourself if you don’t succeed. There’s no coaches, there’s no teammates, there’s no referee, there’s no other external factors that you can blame for winning or losing. You have to take that ownership upon yourself. So it really it forced me to leave no stone unturned in figuring out how to optimize and to, self-mastery, create the best form of myself as a competitor and as a golfer. You can’t control outcomes, but you can control your preparation and, self-mastery, of the game.
I never planned on being at this place where I am now, as a speaker and a writer and entrepreneur. All these things manifested because I was faithful to do the best that I could. In golf I left no stone unturned and it has equipped me for his work. If I hadn’t been faithful to do that then I wouldn’t be ready. Golf allowed me to get, from here to there, and to, self-mastery,
There’s a really good book called “The talent code” by Daniel Coyle and he really brings out that
Whether you’re coaching soccer or teaching a child to play the piano, writing a novel or trying to improve your golf swing, this revolutionary book shows you how to grow talent by tapping into a newly discovered brain mechanism. He feels that just because you have the talent doesn’t mean
it will be nurtured to the level of, self-mastery, its deep work and deep practice to really develop skill, competence and, self-mastery, in any field it’s always a combination of nature and nurture.
I think the mindset of a professional athlete is one that is competitive but not just competitive it’s also inspired. I think having clarity is really important as well. As an athlete you get objective feedback of win or lose, so you can figure out how to get, from here to there, and to, self- mastery, I think the same is true about having a vision. You have a goal you are striving for and you get feedback from whether you are successful or not.
What is your quarter life perspective on, self- mastery,?
I give a lot of credit for this title to my grandpa. When I was writing this book he was an influential voice in my head and life.
How can the, Law of Attraction for couples, help you to thrive at home and at work? NYT best selling author Christy Whitman talks about thriving in your relationships this week on the “Transform your Mind with Coach Myrna” podcast.
Christy is the author of “Quantum Success 7 essential laws, for a thriving joyful and prosperous relationship with your work and money”
Before we get started, I want to give a shout out to our sponsor for today’s episode. Our sponsor today is T.Y Waterproofing serving the Atlanta area. T.Y Waterproofing has over 30 years’ experience in waterproofing and basement repairs. Let T.Y Waterproofing, waterproof your crawl spaces, slabs, remove and kill mold, install all sump pumps, and French drains. Call Timothy at 404-449-5467 for a free estimate.
Christie Whitman is a Transformational Leader, Celebrity coach, New York Times bestselling author twice, one for “The Art of Having it All” and the second for “Taming your Alpha Bitch” I love that title! Christy has appeared on The Today Show, the Morning Show, and her works have been featured in People’s magazine, Seventeen, Women’s Day, Hollywood Life, and Teen Vogue among others.
Christie is the CEO and founder of the Quantum Success Learning Academy and Quantum Success Coaching Academy a 12-month, Law of Attraction, coaching certificate program. Christie has helped thousands of people through her empowerment seminars, speeches and coaching sessions, and products.
Christy’s Journey as a Law of Attraction for Couples Coach
Myrna – That’s was a very impressive Bio. I loved reading it. As a, life coaching podcast, I am always interested in my listeners learning life skills from my guests stories. You’ve done a lot, you’re quite accomplished. Can you give us a little bit of your backstory? Tell us your journey to becoming a successful, Law of Attraction for couples, leader and, quantum success, coach .
Christy – Sure, I always had the drive to be successful, and worked with the, law of attraction, back in day about 20 years ago, before I found the other universal laws, I did what it took to take action. I had perseverance. I went after the things that I wanted. I was able to focus, using the, law of attraction for couples, but whenever I got there, I never felt satisfied.
Using the Law of Attraction for Couples to Bring you Happiness
I never felt happy, never felt like it was enough. So no matter what I accomplished, it just didn’t good. When I actually accomplished something great, it actually would feel the opposite. I remember almost feeling let down, like okay well I was supposed to have this epiphany. I was supposed to have this, amazing feeling. I would never find that feeling of satisfaction.
When I learned more about, the law of attraction for couples, about 21 years ago, I really learned about how your thoughts create your reality. I had already been successful and I had a great career going. I was making money and yet, just wasn’t satisfied. I just felt like all the things that I was told would make me happy it wasn’t working and I was starting to think like what’s wrong with me.
I thought if I had money, if I had the career, if I had a boyfriend, if I had this great body, look a certain way, then I would be happy, and none of the outer things were doing it for me. It was when I found a sense of myself, through meditation on the, law of attraction for couples, and through really returning to myself, stopped focusing outward on everything and everyone outside of me, a healthy selfish me.
I found I was coming back to myself. I started paying attention to the thoughts that I was thinking, that was activating, the law of attraction for couples, and how I was feeling and what I really came to understand, what my body of work really has been now, is that I have to be very mindful of that no matter what situation we’re in, we can always find peace.
How the Law of Polarity interacts with the Law of Attraction
The law of Polarity, there’s a lot of things to appreciate and be grateful for. That’s what my bodywork has been. My whole training for last 21 years has been really sensing within myself where I am. Thinking thoughts of lack and limitation, where I comparing myself to other people. I look at other people and go oh my GOD, there’s so much more successful than me and then start feeling bad about myself and feeling like what I’ve accomplished is not enough.
Or do I compare myself to what other people are making? Or what impacts are my thought having? Those are times to check myself, look for what’s right and good about my life and about my family and everything in my life versus what’s wrong and bad.
These are a different training and a different mindset to come from a perspective of abundance instead of lack and limitation, and that’s really where my internal work has been. Each time I shift up belief, a thought, a perspective from lack and limitation to one of abundance, my life just expands and explodes.
So those are the principles that I write about in my new book, Quantum Success, is that we’re all searching for some type of success, and the accolades. You know what society says is this is accomplished, then you’ll feel successful and a lot of people get there, and they feel empty, they feel like that it doesn’t have much meaning in their lives or they’re not feeling satisfied or fulfilled.
The truth is that as long as we’re chasing things outside of ourselves we’re always projecting our happiness or our fulfillment outside of ourselves. Fulfillment is never outside of ourselves, it’s within ourselves and it’s in the present moment. where all of our power exists.
How does The Law of Attraction for Couples Help in Relationships
Myrna – My first question is How does understanding your belief system help women and men who are functioning at high levels in their career or own their own business, but they’re still struggling to find contentment or happiness? How does understanding the, law of attraction for couples, help? How does understanding, quantum success, principles help in relationships?
Christy – Our beliefs are one of the ways that we create. I mean when you think about it, when we have a belief and there is such a conviction that this is so, that this is the way it is, we will create that’s what we are expecting to receive. It’s what we are expecting life to give us. We can’t create outside of our beliefs. If we believe that something good is going to happen, we then create something good.
There’s an underlying belief that what we are creating we the deserve. We’re not deserving or whatever it is; but we are always creating attracting things from the beliefs that we hold and here’s the good news. If we look at our lives and we’re not satisfied, we need to shift what we’re not satisfied about. Look at what the contrast is in our life, what we don’t want and allow that to be the springboard for what we do want.
I always ask myself when I’m finding a situation or circumstance happening in my life, I always ask myself what would I have to believe in order to create this? How does understanding the, law of attraction, facilitate my knowledge?
How Journaling helps Relationships
It’s an empowering question. I recommend even journaling about it because a lot of times if you sit there and if you haven’t done this practice before, you will not come up with an answer. I would take 10 mins with paper and I would journal. In order to create this situation what would I have to believe? What would I have to think? What would I have to be feeling in order to attract this?
You become more self-aware. I mean it’s really the process of self-awareness and when we can slow down enough to pay attention to ourselves, that is the richest thing that we can do. Not only are we connecting with ourselves, which most of us don’t do these days we’re so busy with so much going on our lives, we need to take the time to slow down and connect with our own self, to know ourselves, to know what you believe about this and that. Beliefs are not either right or wrong. This is a, life coaching podcast, so I will answer with life coaching tips.
I love when you said that most people are not conscious. As a Guyanese, I want this to also be a, Guyana podcast, Most people including Guyanese people, do not understand the, law of attraction, You use the word self-awareness which is another term for consciousness. I’ve spent a lot of time with that word in meditation and being aware. I live in higher consciousness, personal development, yet at my level right now, I will not be able to look at a situation and figure out how I created it.
I’m not there yet, but I’m in the less than 1% of the world that actually are working on self-awareness, consciousness and, personal development, As a, life coaching podcast, I teach my clients basically that whatever they want, they can create. It starts with their thoughts and starts with their belief system. You and I are both, personal development, coaches and one of the first things I do in my coaching sessions, the first couple of weeks is basically we talk about beliefs and we look back at past behaviors. You can actually figure out what you believe from how you have navigated situations in your past.
The Law of Attraction for Couples and the Universal Laws
What exactly is the, Law of Attraction, and why is it important to know the universal laws and, quantum success? The, Law of Attraction for couples, for me when I learned about it completely changed my life and the reason that they completely changed my life or that my life completely changed is because they’re for me like knowing the rules of the game or knowing the recipe to a really good cake or you know the plans to build a house.
I always say how successful would you be if you were going to go play baseball and you never saw the game before? You never knew how it was played? You don’t know what the rules are. Someone hands you a bat and says okay hit the ball. You can’t play the game if you don’t understand the rules of the game. What to do when you hit the ball? How can you get thrown out etc.
Life is similar, you have to learn the rules of the game, you have to learn the playbook. The first step is about learning these, essential universal laws and the, law of attraction, and applying them so that you become the deliberate creator of your life instead of being a victim of circumstances. There’s always going to be some kind of circumstance or situation or event or person that shapes our experiences.
It’s what we do with those experiences the perspectives that we hold, that will determine what we continue to attract in our lives. So the more you learn about these, essential laws of the universe and, the law of attraction. Knowing these universal laws is knowing the rules of the game.
The Seven Universal Laws
I try to make myself a million dollars by working with the, law of attraction, and the seven essential universal laws. We live in a vibratory universe, our universe is all about vibration. Modern science and quantum physics have now proven that everything from a human being to a rock is full of energy. Everything is energy, our thoughts our feelings, what we say, what we do, everything is coming out of us like an energy tower and we as an individual person are sending out energy signals all day every day.
The, Law of Attraction, is just matching those signals that we send out, and giving us more of the same. Now it’s not a tit-for-tat kind of thing, it’s not like oh I told someone they were a jerk and now someone’s going to call me on a jerk. It’s not like that literal, but if you’re sending out negative vibes you could be in traffic and someone could cut you off and you’re experiencing road rage, that negativity for example that wave of negativity will then cast out a returning wave of negativity to you.
So we have to be mindful about the energy that we are sending out. The thoughts that we think, the language we use. We don’t feel good when we’re sending bad vibes out, so using feelings helps makes for better choices.
For example, language like I choose not to put up with this marriage anymore. I choose not to be treated like that anymore. I choose not to waste my money or spend my money on this right now. Those are more empowering ways and languages that we can use that actually do make a difference in what we attract. The, Law of Attraction for couples, is really a mirror reflection. I like to think of it as a boomerang, it’s like what you’re sending out it’s coming back to you.
The most important law from the seven essential laws of the universe, I believe is the, Law of Sufficiency and Abundance. This law states that everything in the universe is abundant. Most of us are experiencing abundance of lack or pain or suffering, but the universe is always going to give us an abundance.
If you look at nature and look at trees you can’t say we can’t possibly count the amount of leaves that are on a tree or how many waves crash up again against the shore in the ocean, or count the raindrops that are coming down from the sky. The universe has always functioned in abundance, and to get what you want from the law is called sufficiency and abundance, it’s being in a satisfied place.
It’s coming from sufficiency. You get there by appreciating and looking for the good. In your life right now, in any situation, I don’t care what it is you can find the good things about it. The law of Polarity says that every subject is really two subjects, it’s the halving of it, or the not having of it. It’s the lack of it or the abundance of it, and when we can deliberately choose how we want to focus, what we want to believe, what we want to appreciate, or not.
How Gratitude engages the Law of Attraction for Couples
Were the ones in charge of which area, what side of the spectrum, we want to be on any given subject, but the doorway into abundance is sufficiency. You start by practicing gratitude. I first started doing gratitude meditation, I would literally walk around and think of a hundred things a day, listing all of the things that I was grateful for and that would raise my vibration, it would make me feel so good and things started, almost like magic, would start being attracted into my life.
Another thing you can do is think about one thing you’re grateful for and think of 20 things or reasons why and it’s not lip service, it’s not like I’m grateful for my husband and I’m grateful my kids, there’s no energy behind that, there’s no pain, you have to feel the emotion. Doesn’t work unless you feel. That’s why affirmations work for some people, and they don’t work for other people because people are like I’m abundant, but there’s no energy.
The other Universal Laws
These are seven essential laws of The Universe:
• The Law of Attraction,
• The Law of Allowing,
• The Law of Pure Potentiality ,
• The law of Oneness,
• The Law of Balance and Harmony,
• The Law of Sufficiency and Abundance,
These universal laws, when you apply them and learn how to work with them, they will absolutely change your life.
The Universe sends human beings countless signs and symbols over the course of their lives, and if you are able to comprehend them, you’ll be able to sense when you’re on your destined path in life—and when you’re not. Please read the list below to make sure you haven’t missed any vital info, and to ensure that you’re on the right journey.
You’re jealous and you’re envious, that is a blockage because it means that you believe that is universe does not have enough for the both of you. if you say I’m happy for my friend, because this world is abundant and she’s not taking my job, there’s more available for me, and you’re happy and you celebrate that person’s success, what that’s saying is that you believe that the world is abundant.
You believe that whatever God can do for her, he is going to do for you, and that’s where a lot of people don’t get it. They’re always envious and they’re always catty and they’re jealous and they can’t celebrate your success. Abraham talks about this. She talks about contrast, she says go out there and look for contrast, look for things that you don’t have and say that’s what I want and be happy for that person. But most people don’t live there. The do not understand the, the essential laws of attraction.
We’ve been talking about the, law of attraction, the playbook, personal development, quantum success, and making this a Guyana podcast, for my people.
Be aware of fear and desire. Awareness helps balance them ~ Deepak Chopra
To get a FREE copy of Christy’s book, Head over to iTunes snd leave a review for the Transform Your Mind with coach Myrna podcast, then head over to www.quantumsuccessbook.com and Kristy will send you her new book when it comes out in September for free. All you do is pay for shipping. Kristy will be back for one more episode.
In this week’s segment of the Mindset Transformation radio show and podcast with Coach Myrna, I teach on the topic how to Raise your Self Esteem by Erasing Self Doubt.
Self confidence and self esteem is the belief that you can accomplish any task or any goal.
Self doubt is the negative narrative that plays in your head. It is like PAC man. It is there to eat up your confidence
I was listening to a Ted talk YouTube video last week and the speaker was telling his story.
He said for 10 years he smoked crack when he woke up and before he went to bed. Hoping to numb the pain of living. He was a disappointment to his mother, his wife and his children. He felt worthless!
On his second trip to prison, he spent a total of 8 years in prison, his adopted mother had a heart attack and he was told she was not going to make it. He felt pretty low that this woman who he adopted him and loved his as her own and tried to give him a better life was now in the hospital, in a cold dark room and he was not there to offer her comfort. This was the first spark of change in him. Maybe he should do something with his life other than being a mess up.
When he got out of prison this time he decided to go to college. He was now a middle aged black man and he was in college with 20 year old white students. Never the less he did good and now looked forward for the accolades his teachers gave him because he was performing better than expected. He said that praise was now his new drug. He lived for his teachers praises. One day one of his teachers put an application for a job on his desk. He couldn’t believe it. His teacher had confidence in him, his teacher had confidence in his ability to do the job. The self confidence seedling inside him got water and grew a little. As his self confidence grew, his life changed. No longer was he a non contributing member to society, he was making a contribution. He now had a new family and 7 years after he was released from prison, he received his PHD in Physiology!
Self confidence doesn’t always come naturally. Sometimes you have to practice and practice until you build it. Sometimes it comes from your teachers or your parents.
So today I will share some tools to help you build up your self confidence and self esteem while starving the negative self talk. The negative talk that tells you, you are not good enough. You can never make it, you are not smart enough, pretty enough, thin enough.
But before we can get to the solution of anything or before we can get to anywhere on the map, we have to know how we got to where we are right now and pinpoint where we are.
For example. If you are at the mall and you are wanting to go to Macy’s department store you look at the map and it shows “You are here” if you want to get to Macy’s than you know you have to walk right or left.
It is the same way in life.
Statics show that we can shed a lot of light on how we got here on the map by looking at our childhood. You see parenting does not come
with a manual and some parents get it right; but most get it wrong.
Understanding your inner child is very important to unlocking the door of where you are on the map today.
You see when you came into the world you were totally dependent on someone else to care for you. Not just to feed you, bathe you, and to keep you warm but to love you, protect you and nurture you.
If whenever you cried your mother or caregiver came and picked you up and smiled at you and comforted you then you transformed that into the feeling of you are important.
If however when you cried you were ignored, then you formed the feeling that you are unwanted.
Even though you have no memory of being a baby, your heart and your internal computers have a record of everything. A hypnotist can go back and pull it out. That is the root of low self esteem and self doubt that is now an oak tree!
If today you are listening to me and you are experiencing low self esteem and self doubt or you don’t understand why you are not getting the results you want. Why you are here on the map and you can never get over there. I challenge you to do the work find out why.
I was watching Oprah Super Soul Sunday a few months ago and she had a guest who talked about going back to your childhood home in your mind and looking out the window. What do you see?
I did this exercise.
I grew up with a single mother and my grandmother in Guyana. Guyana is in South America. Our neighbors are Venezuela and Brazil.
We were very poor. Both my mother and grand mother were domestic servants.
I was the eldest of 4 children and we all lived in a room in a big house.
When I looked through the window of that room. I saw that even though I was poor, I had hope. I had love, I had friends, I was happy.
I saw that I had self confidence because I believed I was attractive. My dad told me so and I believed him.
I had self confidence because I believed I was intelligent. I did well in school. I was a B+ student.
I had self confidence because I knew I would get a good job when I left school. And I did. When I graduated from school, I got a job at the Ministry of Health. I was a payroll clerk paying all the doctors at Georgetown hospital.
I never lost my self confidence. If someone wanted to hurt me by calling me ugly, did nothing to me because I knew I was attractive.
If someone called me stupid, it did nothing to me because I knew I was intelligent.
That is why we have to have an internal lotus of control. You can’t let people steal your self confidence by telling you, “you are not good enough.” You are wonderfully made. As Joel Osteen says “We are all made like a fully loaded top of the line sports car” everything we need to be successful in life is preloaded at the factory. All we have to do is to read the manual!
I challenge you to go back to your childhood home in your mind and look through the window.
We lose self esteem because of a variety of reasons
• We were inadequately nurtured as children.
• We could have absorbed negative messages about ourselves and it still resides in the core of our beings.
• Self esteem is what you think and feel about yourself and not what others think and feel about you.
• How we feel about ourselves, is how we view the world.
To grow in self esteem is to expand our capacity for happiness.
The higher our self esteem the more equipped we are to handle life’s adversities.
The higher our self esteem the more ambitious we are not necessary in a career; but in forming healthy relationships and not repeating destructive patterns.
The higher our self esteem the more likely we are to form nourishing bonds with others.
Our external life is an indication of what is going on inside.
The art of raising our self esteem is a process your level of commitment determines how long raising your self esteem will take.
How to raise your self esteem by erasing self doubt
Some of us never got love from our parents; but we are now mothers. It is important to hug your kids often and tell them you love them. It is important to make your kids feel valuable.
But, even if you get no love from your parents, friends, lovers, you must love yourself. You can never give away what you don’t have. If you don’t love yourself you can’t love your children, you can’t love your husband.
How do you know if you love yourself?
Ask yourself these questions?
• Do I take care of myself?
• Do I make being healthy a priority?
• Am I stretching and challenging myself to be better than I am today?
• Am I living life with passion or am I just passing through?
If you answered No to any of these questions then you need to make some changes in your life before you get to 80 years old and realize that you never lived.
How do you erase self doubt?
By Thinking it, speaking it and doing it!
The weeds that take over the garden of your mind can only flourish if you are a bad gardener!
You have to protect your dreams by plucking up the weeds before they grow. They will come. Self doubt always comes; but you have to pluck them out by speaking of your goals and doing something to get you moving towards the place on the map you want to go.
That is why you have to know where you are so you won’t move in the opposite direction.
First Think it. There is nothing good or bad but thinking makes it so. William Shakespeare.
Rhonda brine of the secret says “What you think about you bring about”
Your thoughts affect your attitude, your self confidence, your mood, and there is a direct relationship to your thoughts and your experiences in life.
Remember when you were a kid and your parents would tell not to hang around Johnny or Jane? They did not know why; but they knew that if you kept company with Jonny or Jane, no good would come of you.
In the same way if you keep replaying negative emotions in your head such as fear, discontent, anger, jealousy, insecurities, blame etc then you will keep attracting more negative energy to your experience.
But if you are wanting that promotion and you see yourself in this new role and you are confident that you will get this promotion then you will. You might not get it at your first try but if you never give up it will be yours eventually; conversely, If you want this promotion; but you place road blocks in your path such as any and all negative thoughts then chances are you will never attract this reality into your experience.
When we think, our thoughts become like magnets and attract, and then attach to like thoughts. That is why it manifests in our life.
Nothing shows up in our life unless we attract it.
We have all seen the power of attraction in motion when if we have something bad happen to us at the beginning of the day, bad things keep on happening for the rest of the day.
So, it is very important to watch what you think.
Now let’s take a look at Speak it.
The spoken word is a powerful tool and by leveraging your voice you expand your dreams from internal thoughts to external possibilities, laying the ground work for divine purpose to manifest. Deepak Chopra
When you take your thoughts, which are formless and speak them into the atmosphere you give them form. This empowers them.
“Talk happiness; talk faith; talk health. Say you are well, and all will be well with you. God shall hear your words and make them true.” Ella Wheeler Wilcox
So, remember to speak it. Tell a friend or your coach of your intentions.
And lastly “just do it.” Nike made this phrase popular but it applies to more than athletics. Just do it. There will never be a better time than the present.
“He who waits to do a great deal of good at once will never do anything.”
― Samuel Johnson
So “just do it.” Think about something you have been thinking of doing for some time. Tell someone about it and then take the first step. It does not have to be a giant step. It could be as simple as doing research or taking that nice red Mercedes out for a test drive; but it will be a step in the right direction.
I hope my presentation was thought provoking. These are the principles I live by and I attract all that I want into my experience; so give it a try.
If you lack self confidence and would like to talk to a coach, I offer a 30 min Free strategy session to help you gain self confidence to achieve your goals.
Click this link to set up your Free Strategy Session