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Finding Love The Second Time Around

Trust issues in relationships

Today my guest is Ms Patricia Fuqua. Patricia is a best-selling author, award-winning motivational speaker, and relationship expert, specializing in, second time around, today we’re going be talking on the topic “How to find your diamond the, second time around,” I am going to enjoy talking to you because I’ve been around more than twice!

Bio

Let me tell you more about my guest Ms Patricia Fuqua. Patricia is the founder
of Dating Diamonds, a service that empowers women to meet the right man the, second time around. She is the creator of the “First Date the Soulmate Program” and since she has helped over 500 women meet the right man by designing a personalized plan. She helps them implement that plan. She’s polished the art of relationship in her 40 year marriage to her, soulmate, husband.

Her strategy benefits men too, after all the more knowledge you have the more you can thrive. Her clients can be found in major cities including Sydney, Washington DC, Sacramento and San Francisco. She mentors women to use the story of their lives to create the relationship they choose the second time around. Patricia has her master’s degree in American literature and an adult IDI
credential from San Francisco State University.
She holds coaching credentials from the Academy of Excellence and the
Windless Institute. She is a certified matchmaker with the matchmaker Institute and, second time around, coach.

Patricia also produced and hosted the TV show called the Patricia Fuqua show, a platform for using intuitive and spiritual practices as guides for better
relationships.

How to find your diamond the second time around

Well Patricia that is a very excellent Bio, it covers a lot of territory.
I always like to start off my show asking my guests of their journey to this point in their career. Can you talk about your journey to becoming a relationship expert and author specializing in the, second time around? I know that you’ve been married for years and I need to say congratulations right off the top because that is quite an accomplishment; but how did you transcend your own relationship to becoming a coach?

Patricia: Well, now I’ve honed and polished my communication skills; but it wasn’t always this way. There was a time in my marriage when I
was depressed because I was juggling career and the needs of young children
and my husband. I got really depressed because I was really feeling sorry for myself and then I got mad went into this deep funk. It wasn’t until I discovered that I had the choice to be happy or to be sad that I started to turn myself around.

It wasn’t my husband, it wasn’t my children, it wasn’t my job, it wasn’t my life. It was the way I was looking at it so, when I discovered that I could be happy as a choice as well as being sad, I started to reach for better feeling thoughts, finding something good about everything and anytime somebody made me upset or I felt overwhelmed. I said okay so what’s the silver lining here?

Helping women find love the second time around

I started to get answers and so as I discovered the power of choosing how I was going to feel about any situation or any person or relationship I said to myself this I have to share with the rest of the women in my life, because we could be so much happier if we only knew we could just choose to do it. I have the technique to show them so that’s when I became inspired to start coaching women because I love happy people.

I just love being around happy people and helping them
learn to be happy the, second time around.  Helping them to have more love in their lives.
I always been a spiritual person studying spiritual practices, some people would say religion, and always I wanted to be in alignment with source, some people would say God, Universe, Higher Intelligence. There are many names
for that creator and so as a result that’s how I started coaching. I started
saying well this is what I’ve learned about being happy and in love, so I’m
wanting to share this with you and we can personalize it for you so that you
too can have more love and happiness in your life.

And that one day that I had this record-breaking seminar for women, it was just like they were lined up around the table and down the aisles waiting to speak to me. I was just giving them these nuggets of wisdoms and, second time around, nuggets that I had come to from my reading from my study and they were walking away happy, so it was a great day.
It was it’s one of those peak experiences.

We are all looking for happiness

Myrna: Wow that is awesome and you know a lot of people would go through that process and keep it all to themselves, so it’s absolutely great that
you through that process realized that everything is better when you share.
That’s an overstatement, everything is better when you share. God gives
you a testimony, so that you can share and you can encourage and it’s really
profound that you had this really record-breaking experience of everybody
wanted a piece because you’ve hit on something.

Happiness, is a rare quality, even when you’ve got all you want
somehow a lot of people are still not happy and you know it’s really
interesting; but I did an interview on this show with a monk
called Swami G about 2 years and this morning Facebook shared the memory.
I reposted, he was saying that happiness doesn’t come from external
Sources, just like you have figured out it comes from inside and that’s why you
know the Buddhist monks talk about enlightenment, because when you’re
enlightened you know suffering and unhappiness doesn’t come to you.

I woke up this morning with some heavy things going on in my
life and my children, and when I posted it. I said, I wish that
I myself can tap into that field today. I was meditating this morning from very early in the morning and it just didn’t work because my mind was too busy. So, if you have gems that help people, that is why they’re lined up because it’s something that you know we all require at some point in time.

We don’t have to be depressed but some days just knock you down. Good story so I’m glad that you were able to bottle your experiences to help others to get there as well. You touched on something as well about you being
very spiritual and connected to source. So my second question is how can other women use intuitive and spiritual practices as a guide for better relationships the, second time around?

Let’s just add happiness on to that.

That’s the exciting part of my practice because when I’m sharing with women the seven principles that are in the book, Second Time Around,
meditation is number one and I’m glad that you’re a meditator because even
when we feel that, oh my God my mind is so busy it didn’t make a difference, it
does make a difference because you’re quieting your mind,
and it can give you a different perspective on a situation.

I’ve learned over time that women need to or benefit from having a different
perspective on the situation, or relationship, and dating and love and
happiness because we can as a group, are very sensitive and emotional. Some
more than others, and when we can tap into that place where we’re feeling not
as positive as we could and start to look at least one positive thing
about a situation, you recognize what they’re feeling and to shift.

It’s kind of like this morning you said you woke up with heavy feelings and the meditation didn’t feel like it was making a difference, however if it ever entered your mind that oh well this is something I could be thankful for in this
situation, that is going to raise your emotional tone.
We get stronger at managing our feelings and eventually we get to the place where we can move more quickly up this emotional scale to happiness or at least optimism, and after meditation if you say to yourself oh well it wasn’t
quite as bad as I thought because B and C is in place, you move up the scale.

You are correct, this morning I didn’t come up with
any positives, but I came up with some guidance and that’s basically what
happens when you quiet your mind right the Universe, God, your
Higher self gives you some guidance and some next steps.

What are you bringing to the table

Some of the other principles have to do with just mining. Like gold mining your own story to figure out what you really want to experience in relationship. Some women want to feel pampered and protected and privileged, and you know what is it each woman needs is to discover or to remind herself what she really wants to experience in relationship. Some women are very conventional and they like the idea of having a man play a man’s role, do the man things in in the conventional sense, manage the house, take out the garbage,
that sort of thing.

Other women want somebody to plan their fun, so what is it that helps you feel the way you want to feel in relationship, that you would like that other person to be doing? That’s one of the key principles, there are seven total principles we don’t have time to go into them all now. Meditation to manage your own
thoughts and feelings. Now it your, second time around, what are you bringing to the table?

Awesome, alright so again we’re touching on mindsets a little bit, so this is an interesting question for me to ask you because we’re specifically talking here about the, second time around. Women who has been divorced, the woman is maybe in a committed relationship, maybe not necessarily married; but they’re
starting over again and your mindset is very crucial because your mindset can
actually keep you from making this a positive experience.
So what mindset do you coach your women and men then that they have to develop when they’re in the, second time around?

I have the attitude that there is a lid for every pot.

Know what you want the second time around

That’s an old southern expression that means all they have to do is be very clear on the vision of what they want to experience and they will meet that person.
So those mindsets have to be in the present. If we’re going to develop a relationship a, second time around, that is satisfying and that can last. Having a lid and every pot means that there’s a match for you somewhere, and if you have a clear vision on the match you know as a coach as well any coaching whether it’s for whatever you want just have a clear vision of it and that’s the way you attract it to you.

I was thinking that is the most important mindset that they have to develop is that they have release the baggage of the last relationship. How do you feel about that?

It’s important to be aware of the baggage of the last
relationship because it can be like a weight around your ankles pulling you
down and away from what you want. It’s also important to be able to shift
that attitude that you might have developed, that feeling about
relationship or about the opposite gender that you had. The awareness the
self-awareness of knowing what that attitude is that’s blocking you will
allow you to come up with an alternative, so that you can do the things, say the
things that will help you attract that clear vision that you have. That’s the
lid for your pot so to speak.

Myrna: Like I said in the beginning of the podcasts, I’ve been around
the block several times myself and what I have found. To clarify I have been married like four times, what I have found is that a lot of times the baggage is
you come out of a relationship and there is a negative experience you make sure that there’s not that a negative experience is not in your next partner;
but a lot of times you find something else right, so how do you coach women
around “hey I don’t want to have a guy like that again kind of scenario?

Let the laws of attraction work for you

Patricia: I understand what you’re saying and the Law of our Universe, some people call it the Law of Attraction but the way it’s
set up is that it wants us to be happy that law is God in action or the
Universe in action or the Creator in action. We are put here to have fun
that’s the point in the studies that I have had and so when we focus on what we really want the universe hears.

The trick becomes being able to manage your feelings and
your thoughts and your attitudes so that you’re focusing on what you really want it doesn’t understand anything except for what you spend the most time
thinking about, so if you’re spending most of your time thinking about oh my
God that was the worst relationship ever, I never want to see a guy like that again! Well, that’s what you’re going to get more of or some variation, because you’re spending so much time on it and that’s what a Universe is answering.

That is the perfect answer because, yes that is exactly what happens.
That’s why a lot of women go in relationships that are
almost the same because they keep attracting the same kind of man or the
same kind of relationship because they’re saying well this is this is what
I don’t want. Let’s take an example of a cheater, this is what I don’t want or
even an abusive relationship, and then you are cycling through those all the
time because they tell the universe what they don’t want and that is exactly what shows up. I like what you said, whatever you spend time thinking about
whether it’s what you don’t want or what you do want then that’s what’s going to show up. Excellent answer.

Myrna: Who would you say is your ideal client?

My ideal client is a woman of experience and substance who has had more than one relationship, I used, second time around, because that’s a very familiar expression; but she usually has raised her children, she’s launched them into college or into the work world and she’s comfortable in her career and in a single mom.

All these years I’ve been raising the kids I’ve been taking care of other people. I have a great social life; but where is my special partner? I like this woman. I prefer this as the ideal client although men in the situation my teachings work as well; because they have had enough variety and experience they know what they want through conversation and we can plan how their strategy is going to roll out and make it happen.

I shouldn’t say make it happen but we can work with my spiritual principles so that they’re very clear on what they want, they know how to manage their mindset, they know what they would prefer to experience, they’re open to using these practices. Example: One of my clients was sitting at an
outside café in my little town here of Menlo Park one afternoon with her
college son who was home for the holiday and a man saw her at this outside café, parked his car came over to meet her.

She had been trained by me who had the strategy of being approachable, she looked radiantly beautiful; because I said honey anytime you go out you have got to look good. People are attracted by the visual. She was in line with that and so he came over sat down next to her as if he were her best friend they started chatting well as her calm was being the hostess and making him
feel comfortable; because she found out right away that he was her type of
guy. At the end of that short conversation, he passed his telephone
number to her on a napkin and said if you want to continue this just give me a
call, that was six years ago. They’re still together.

It’s about being clear, always being ready so you don’t have to
get ready and being ready for who comes into your world; so that you can check them out and decide if you want to get to know them better.

Always be ready so do don’t have to get ready

I love the last tagline. I think Will Smith says that best he says you
should always be ready cause if you’re ready, you ain’t got to get ready.
All right now let’s get a little personal and transparent. I know
you’ve been happily married for over forty years
you talked in your BIO in your journey or your history that
there was a period of time when you were depressed, because you’re doing so much, and your happiness came after you decided that you had
a choice and it was not your husband or your kids job to make
you happy.

I absolutely love that. I know this personally because that’s the reason I’m finally happy. After running around and trying to find happiness by having other people give it to me, the reason I’m happy in my relationship
is because I meditate and I do me. I don’t depend on anyone
else to be to make me happy. I make myself happy; but I saw this in
print the other day when Jennifer Garner and Ben Affleck had left her. He
cheated on her with the nanny and I think she was having an interview and
she said point blank that it was not Ben’s job to make sure that she was
happy. I’m sure a lot of people that are not in our space
wouldn’t understand that; but I absolutely loved it.
So what would you say is the reason for your marital success?

Marital success second time around

Well marital success the, second time around, means also that there’s a the dark side of it that there are some times that are not successful and after years there have been times where I haven’t been successful at being happily married and so now that I am happily married, that I’ve gone through some things so the idea here is every situation that has conflict in it.

I have learned to ask myself what would you prefer here Patricia? And when I get the answer to that then I can get busy, I can start conversations. In the book, I’m leading women to go from “first date to soul mate” with these principles and it doesn’t stop once you meet and develop the relationship with your soulmate, the conversations and the communication has to continue through the inevitable conflicts that happen between two people in an intimate personal relationship.

So as a result I’ve learned to use that very powerful question
“What would you prefer here Patricia?” That tells me that I
need to start doing my practices and asking that question.
What is it you want the man to do? What it is you
want the woman to do? We don’t communicate what we want we just fight about it because we’re expecting to be mind reader’s.

As we wrap up our show today, Patricia how can our readers and listeners get in touch with you and get a copy of your book, second time around?

I would love to chat with people or let them know a link for the book and so I would ask people to just email me Patricia@datingdiamonds.com Put in the subject line “chat” or “Book” and I’ll send you a copy of the book
which will go into some of the seven principles that I talked about.

Remember to subscribe to the Transform Your Mind podcast on iTunes
and leave a review. Much appreciated.

Additional Resources

What Men Want In A Woman

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How to Use the Law of Attraction for Couples

How can the, Law of Attraction for couples, help you to thrive at home and at work? NYT best selling author Christy Whitman talks about thriving in your relationships this week  on the “Transform your Mind with Coach Myrna” podcast.

Christy is the author of “Quantum Success 7 essential laws, for a thriving joyful and prosperous relationship with your work and money”

Life coach Myrna Young interviews Christy on her, personal development, life coaching podcast.  I am speaking  to 2 Times New York Bestselling author Ms Christy Whitman. Christy is also the author of “The Art of having It All”, Perfect Pictures, and “Taming your Alpha Bitch” and she has a new book that’s coming out in September that’s called, “Quantum Success, 7 essential laws, for a thriving joyful and prosperous relationship with your work and money”

Law of Attraction Thriving Introduction

I am so excited to be talking again to Christy. This is our second in a series of 3. Our topic today is coming directly from Christie’s new book.

iHeart Radio

https://www.iheart.com/podcast/269-Transform-your-Mind-29542107/

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Soundcloud Transform your mind podcast
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Christie Whitman is a Transformational Leader, Celebrity coach, New York Times bestselling author twice, one for “The Art of Having it All” and the second for “Taming your Alpha Bitch” I love that title! Christy has appeared on The Today Show, the Morning Show, and her works have been featured in People’s magazine, Seventeen, Women’s Day, Hollywood Life, and Teen Vogue among others.

Christie is the CEO and founder of the Quantum Success Learning Academy and Quantum Success Coaching Academy a 12-month, Law of Attraction, coaching certificate program. Christie has helped thousands of people through her empowerment seminars, speeches and coaching sessions, and products.

Christi’s life-changing message reached over 200,000 people a month, and her work has been promoted by and featured with esteem authors and luminaries such as Marianne Williamson, Dr. Dwayne Dwyer, Marci Shimoff, Brian Tracy, Neil Donald Walsh, Abram Hicks, and Louise Hay. She currently lives in Arizona with her husband Frederic and there are two boys Alexander and Maxim.

Christy’s Journey as a Law of Attraction for Couples Coach

Myrna – That’s was a very impressive Bio. I loved reading it. As a, life coaching podcast, I am always interested in my listeners learning life skills from my guests stories. You’ve done a lot, you’re quite accomplished. Can you give us a little bit of your backstory? Tell us your journey to becoming a successful, Law of Attraction for couples, leader and, quantum success, coach .

Christy – Sure, I always had the drive to be successful, and worked with the, law of attraction, back in day about 20 years ago, before I found the other universal laws, I did what it took to take action. I had perseverance. I went after the things that I wanted. I was able to focus, using the, law of attraction for couples, but whenever I got there, I never felt satisfied.

Using the Law of Attraction for Couples to Bring you Happiness

I never felt happy, never felt like it was enough. So no matter what I accomplished, it just didn’t good. When I actually accomplished something great, it actually would feel the opposite. I remember almost feeling let down, like okay well I was supposed to have this epiphany. I was supposed to have this, amazing feeling. I would never find that feeling of satisfaction.

When I learned more about, the law of attraction for couples, about 21 years ago, I really learned about how your thoughts create your reality. I had already been successful and I had a great career going. I was making money and yet, just wasn’t satisfied. I just felt like all the things that I was told would make me happy it wasn’t working and I was starting to think like what’s wrong with me.

I thought if I had money, if I had the career, if I had a boyfriend, if I had this great body, look a certain way, then I would be happy, and none of the outer things were doing it for me. It was when I found a sense of myself, through meditation on the, law of attraction for couples, and through really returning to myself, stopped focusing outward on everything and everyone outside of me, a healthy selfish me.

I found I was coming back to myself. I started paying attention to the thoughts that I was thinking, that was activating, the law of attraction for couples, and how I was feeling and what I really came to understand, what my body of work really has been now, is that I have to be very mindful of that no matter what situation we’re in, we can always find peace.

How to Have it All using the, Law of Attraction

How the Law of Polarity interacts with the Law of Attraction

The law of Polarity, there’s a lot of things to appreciate and be grateful for. That’s what my bodywork has been. My whole training for last 21 years has been really sensing within myself where I am. Thinking thoughts of lack and limitation, where I comparing myself to other people. I look at other people and go oh my GOD, there’s so much more successful than me and then start feeling bad about myself and feeling like what I’ve accomplished is not enough.

Or do I compare myself to what other people are making? Or what impacts are my thought having? Those are times to check myself, look for what’s right and good about my life and about my family and everything in my life versus what’s wrong and bad.

These are a different training and a different mindset to come from a perspective of abundance instead of lack and limitation, and that’s really where my internal work has been. Each time I shift up belief, a thought, a perspective from lack and limitation to one of abundance, my life just expands and explodes.

So those are the principles that I write about in my new book, Quantum Success, is that we’re all searching for some type of success, and the accolades. You know what society says is this is accomplished, then you’ll feel successful and a lot of people get there, and they feel empty, they feel like that it doesn’t have much meaning in their lives or they’re not feeling satisfied or fulfilled.

The truth is that as long as we’re chasing things outside of ourselves we’re always projecting our happiness or our fulfillment outside of ourselves. Fulfillment is never outside of ourselves, it’s within ourselves and it’s in the present moment. where all of our power exists.

How does The Law of Attraction for Couples Help in Relationships

Myrna – My first question is How does understanding your belief system help women and men who are functioning at high levels in their career or own their own business, but they’re still struggling to find contentment or happiness? How does understanding the, law of attraction for couples, help? How does understanding, quantum success, principles help in relationships?

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Christy – Our beliefs are one of the ways that we create. I mean when you think about it, when we have a belief and there is such a conviction that this is so, that this is the way it is, we will create that’s what we are expecting to receive. It’s what we are expecting life to give us. We can’t create outside of our beliefs. If we believe that something good is going to happen, we then create something good.

There’s an underlying belief that what we are creating we the deserve. We’re not deserving or whatever it is; but we are always creating attracting things from the beliefs that we hold and here’s the good news. If we look at our lives and we’re not satisfied, we need to shift what we’re not satisfied about. Look at what the contrast is in our life, what we don’t want and allow that to be the springboard for what we do want.

I always ask myself when I’m finding a situation or circumstance happening in my life, I always ask myself what would I have to believe in order to create this? How does understanding the, law of attraction, facilitate my knowledge?

How Journaling helps Relationships

It’s an empowering question. I recommend even journaling about it because a lot of times if you sit there and if you haven’t done this practice before, you will not come up with an answer. I would take 10 mins with paper and I would journal. In order to create this situation what would I have to believe? What would I have to think? What would I have to be feeling in order to attract this?

You become more self-aware. I mean it’s really the process of self-awareness and when we can slow down enough to pay attention to ourselves, that is the richest thing that we can do. Not only are we connecting with ourselves, which most of us don’t do these days we’re so busy with so much going on our lives, we need to take the time to slow down and connect with our own self, to know ourselves, to know what you believe about this and that. Beliefs are not either right or wrong. This is a, life coaching podcast, so I will answer with life coaching tips.

I love when you said that most people are not conscious. As a Guyanese, I want this to also be a, Guyana podcast, Most people including Guyanese people, do not understand the, law of attraction, You use the word self-awareness which is another term for consciousness. I’ve spent a lot of time with that word in meditation and being aware. I live in higher consciousness, personal development, yet at my level right now, I will not be able to look at a situation and figure out how I created it.

I’m not there yet, but I’m in the less than 1% of the world that actually are working on self-awareness, consciousness and, personal development, As a, life coaching podcast, I teach my clients basically that whatever they want, they can create. It starts with their thoughts and starts with their belief system. You and I are both, personal development, coaches and one of the first things I do in my coaching sessions, the first couple of weeks is basically we talk about beliefs and we look back at past behaviors. You can actually figure out what you believe from how you have navigated situations in your past.

The Law of Attraction for Couples and the Universal Laws

What exactly is the, Law of Attraction, and why is it important to know the universal laws and, quantum success? The, Law of Attraction for couples, for me when I learned about it completely changed my life and the reason that they completely changed my life or that my life completely changed is because they’re for me like knowing the rules of the game or knowing the recipe to a really good cake or you know the plans to build a house.

I always say how successful would you be if you were going to go play baseball and you never saw the game before? You never knew how it was played? You don’t know what the rules are. Someone hands you a bat and says okay hit the ball. You can’t play the game if you don’t understand the rules of the game. What to do when you hit the ball? How can you get thrown out etc.

Life is similar, you have to learn the rules of the game, you have to learn the playbook. The first step is about learning these, essential universal laws and the, law of attraction, and applying them so that you become the deliberate creator of your life instead of being a victim of circumstances. There’s always going to be some kind of circumstance or situation or event or person that shapes our experiences.

It’s what we do with those experiences the perspectives that we hold, that will determine what we continue to attract in our lives. So the more you learn about these, essential laws of the universe and, the law of attraction. Knowing these universal laws is knowing the rules of the game.

The Seven Universal Laws

I try to make myself a million dollars by working with the, law of attraction, and the seven essential universal laws. We live in a vibratory universe, our universe is all about vibration. Modern science and quantum physics have now proven that everything from a human being to a rock is full of energy. Everything is energy, our thoughts our feelings, what we say, what we do, everything is coming out of us like an energy tower and we as an individual person are sending out energy signals all day every day.

The, Law of Attraction, is just matching those signals that we send out, and giving us more of the same. Now it’s not a tit-for-tat kind of thing, it’s not like oh I told someone they were a jerk and now someone’s going to call me on a jerk. It’s not like that literal, but if you’re sending out negative vibes you could be in traffic and someone could cut you off and you’re experiencing road rage, that negativity for example that wave of negativity will then cast out a returning wave of negativity to you.

So we have to be mindful about the energy that we are sending out. The thoughts that we think, the language we use. We don’t feel good when we’re sending bad vibes out, so using feelings helps makes for better choices.

For example, language like I choose not to put up with this marriage anymore. I choose not to be treated like that anymore. I choose not to waste my money or spend my money on this right now. Those are more empowering ways and languages that we can use that actually do make a difference in what we attract. The, Law of Attraction for couples, is really a mirror reflection. I like to think of it as a boomerang, it’s like what you’re sending out it’s coming back to you.

The most important law from the seven essential laws of the universe, I believe is the, Law of Sufficiency and Abundance. This law states that everything in the universe is abundant. Most of us are experiencing abundance of lack or pain or suffering, but the universe is always going to give us an abundance.

If you look at nature and look at trees you can’t say we can’t possibly count the amount of leaves that are on a tree or how many waves crash up again against the shore in the ocean, or count the raindrops that are coming down from the sky. The universe has always functioned in abundance, and to get what you want from the law is called sufficiency and abundance, it’s being in a satisfied place.

It’s coming from sufficiency. You get there by appreciating and looking for the good. In your life right now, in any situation, I don’t care what it is you can find the good things about it. The law of Polarity says that every subject is really two subjects, it’s the halving of it, or the not having of it. It’s the lack of it or the abundance of it, and when we can deliberately choose how we want to focus, what we want to believe, what we want to appreciate, or not.

How Gratitude engages the Law of Attraction for Couples

Were the ones in charge of which area, what side of the spectrum, we want to be on any given subject, but the doorway into abundance is sufficiency. You start by practicing gratitude. I first started doing gratitude meditation, I would literally walk around and think of a hundred things a day, listing all of the things that I was grateful for and that would raise my vibration, it would make me feel so good and things started, almost like magic, would start being attracted into my life.

Another thing you can do is think about one thing you’re grateful for and think of 20 things or reasons why and it’s not lip service, it’s not like I’m grateful for my husband and I’m grateful my kids, there’s no energy behind that, there’s no pain, you have to feel the emotion. Doesn’t work unless you feel. That’s why affirmations work for some people, and they don’t work for other people because people are like I’m abundant, but there’s no energy.

The other Universal Laws

These are seven essential laws of The Universe:
• The Law of Attraction,
• The Law of Allowing,
• The Law of Pure Potentiality ,
• The law of Oneness,
• The Law of Balance and Harmony,
• The Law of Sufficiency and Abundance,
•
These universal laws, when you apply them and learn how to work with them, they will absolutely change your life.

The Universe sends human beings countless signs and symbols over the course of their lives, and if you are able to comprehend them, you’ll be able to sense when you’re on your destined path in life—and when you’re not. Please read the list below to make sure you haven’t missed any vital info, and to ensure that you’re on the right journey.

Here are 13 signs The, Law of Attraction, is working for you
https://ewao.com/2017/10/24/13-signs-the-law-of-attraction-is-working-for-you/
I love the Law of Sufficiency and Abundance. Deepak Chopra used to say we are just like a wave in the ocean, that the universe is abundant. We’re not going to run out of water, we’re not going to run out of grass, sunlight. I’ve used this Law, let’s say that you want a promotion and your friend gets it.

You’re jealous and you’re envious, that is a blockage because it means that you believe that is universe does not have enough for the both of you. if you say I’m happy for my friend, because this world is abundant and she’s not taking my job, there’s more available for me, and you’re happy and you celebrate that person’s success, what that’s saying is that you believe that the world is abundant.

You believe that whatever God can do for her, he is going to do for you, and that’s where a lot of people don’t get it. They’re always envious and they’re always catty and they’re jealous and they can’t celebrate your success. Abraham talks about this. She talks about contrast, she says go out there and look for contrast, look for things that you don’t have and say that’s what I want and be happy for that person. But most people don’t live there. The do not understand the, the essential laws of attraction.

We’ve been talking about the, law of attraction, the playbook, personal development, quantum success, and making this a Guyana podcast, for my people.

Be aware of fear and desire. Awareness helps balance them ~ Deepak Chopra

To get a FREE copy of Christy’s book, Head over to iTunes snd leave a review for the Transform Your Mind with coach Myrna podcast, then head over to www.quantumsuccessbook.com and Kristy will send you her new book when it comes out in September for free. All you do is pay for shipping. Kristy will be back for one more episode.

Our topic will be “How to reverse the negative momentum in your career.” So remember to subscribe and you will not miss any new episodes. If you are from Guyana, I hope you enjoyed this, Law of Attraction podcast, leave me a shout out in the comments.

Additional Resources

Using the Law of Attraction to Have it All

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How to Program Yourself for Positive Change

Positive change, is identifying the things that are most important in your life, and then start eliminating everything else. This is all about simplifying your life, so that you can focus on the things that matter most to you and prevents you from getting distracted.

 

Here are some tips on Positive Change from the book “Switch”

How to, change, things when, change, is hardby Chip Heath and Dan Heath

Here are the facts:

Change, is a process.

1: Positive Change, is usually a situation problem, and not a personal problem.
2: For anything to, change, someone must behave differently.
3: To, change, someone’s behavior, you must, change, someone’s situation.
4: For, positive change, to stick you must influence the person’s heart and mind.

A Story on Positive Change

Arthur was an airborne paratrooper. Jumping out of airplanes killed his knees, his back, his legs. When he got out of the army he walked with a cane and couldn’t do anything so he gained a lot of weight. He could not support his weight, so he couldn’t do traditional exercise. His health rapidly declined. The doctor at the VA clinic told him to accept his faith, that he would never walk normal again.

One day while surfing the internet, he came across Diamond Dallas Page doing yoga. He said to himself, I could do this. So He bought the DVD! He figured he could use his arm to support his weight and get a cardio workout. Arthur was 297 lbs when he started doing yoga.
When he started his yoga exercises, he kept falling down and falling down, but he kept getting back up again and again!
Every day he got better and better in 10 months he had lost over 100 lbs and could not only walk without a cane but he could run!!

Change, is usually situational. Arthur had a situational problem.

Arthur taught himself to do yoga because he decided to take control of his life. He got his heart and mind in the game and changed the situation!

Change is a process.

To lead a process requires persistence. Arthur kept getting back up and trying again to do his exercises.

When a, positive change, starts, it builds on itself.
The better Arthur got at yoga, the more he was motivated to keep going.
Positive change,  can snowball.
Change, rarely works unless it is motivated by feeling. Arthur wanted to feel better about himself so he made the hard choices.

That’s my tip of the week from coach Myrna.

How to change when change is hard.

There can be nothing harder than trying to loose 100 lbs when you can’t use your legs; but Arthur found a way and so can you.

Our guest today is coach Dan Willms and he is a, positive change, guru. This is his space.

Dan Willms is a Life & Business Coach, an MBA Professor, a facilitator for The Leadership Challenge, a writer and an International Speaker – he is also the creator of the Positive Change Workshop and facilitates his workshops in Portuguese, English & Spanish. He has facilitated more than 118 Positive Change Workshops. He loves helping people and organizations to achieve their fullest potential. He is the co-author of the book Strategic Leadership (Liderança Estratégica) and the author of the upcoming book “Positive Change – One life @ a time”.

Dan is also my partner, we do a video blog on YouTube every week called “You asked for it” where we answer questions sent in from our social media network. Like us on Facebook to become part of our community. Myrna Young Lifecoach and Dan Willms.

Using I am Affirmations for Positive change

I am affirmations, formulate, affirm, and perpetuate the stories you tell yourself. Stories about who you are, who you can be, and what you can do. I Am affirmations, are a powerful way to, program yourself, for, positive change.

If you want to make a, change, start where you are. Start with who you are. Support yourself right here, before you have all the answers. Do that and you’ll feel more supported in the process. And that can, change, well, everything.

  1. I am a living, breathing example of the kind of world I want to live in.
  2. I am a powerful force for good in the world.
  3. I am on the right path. I am moving in the right direction.
  4. I am worthy of all things wonderful.
  5. I am being guided to what’s best for me and everyone else.
  6. I am powerful enough to live in accordance with my own values, desire, and truths.
  7. I am in the exact place I need to be to get to where I want to be.
  8. I am intentionally promoting a life filled with joy.
  9. I am a firm believer in my ideas.

Show notes Positive Change

Question 1. Tell us about your journey to becoming a Life coach and an ambassador for, positive change.
Question 2: What is The, Positive Change?
Question 3: Tell me about your happiness labs, how does it work?
Question 4: : What were your findings on these labs from your sample size of 400 people?
Question 5: So, based on your labs, what would you say is the secret to happiness?
Question 6: Why do you think is there so much unhappiness in the world?

Additional Resources

How to Transform your Career with Purpose

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5 Ways to Radiate on the Happiness Wheel

The Happiness Wheel

Happiness, cannot be seen or touched,  it is Spiritual. In the, pursuit of happiness, we all want to be on the, happiness wheel. Why do we all want to be Happy? Because everybody wants, happiness.

The healing influence of being on the,  happiness wheel, travels literally at the speed of light. Like a single inspiring thought that goes out on the internet and reaches millions of people in just a few hours; being on the, happiness wheel, multiplies exponentially … Replacing chaos, confusion, and conflict with order, clarity, and peace.

There are two types of, happiness:

  1. The first kind of, happiness, comes from things turning out the way we’d like them to. This is known as, happiness, for a reason. You are on the, happiness wheel, because life is good. We say, “I’m happy because I have a family and friends,” or “I’m happy because I am in a relationship,” or “I’m happy because I’m going on vacation,” and so on. This kind of, happiness, is inherently fleeting because it depends on external reasons that can be taken away from us at any time. Although we tend to avoid thinking about it, we can lose our friends, our job, our savings, our health, and our loved ones at any time.
  2. These are temporary, external sources of, happiness, that come and go like a passing breeze. But, a real, happiness wheel, can only flow from the inside out. It cannot be achieved by depending on people, things, employment etc.

Happiness Film

In the movie “show me the money” Tom Cruise made popular the phrase “you complete me” I know it sounds good and we all would like to know that someone feels that way about us; but someone else cannot truly complete us.

Only God is our source of true, happiness. He promises to “never leave you or forsake you.

Transform Your mind Podcast with coach Myrna
Transform Your mind Podcast

So how do you radiate on the, Happiness Wheel, from the inside out?

As a Spiritual Life Coach, I have researched the following ways:

  1. Laughter – Laughter is a symptom of spirituality. Laughter is the flow of love coursing through your body. Laughter is the nectar of present moment awareness. Invite more laughter into your life and relish the magic in every moment.
  2. I am a very happy person. I have massive amounts of energy, I laugh frequently and smile naturally all the time. Once in a while something or someone would knock me off my, happiness, perch; but I don’t linger there. I immediately seek out  my Happy place. Remember the movie “Happy Gilmore”?

You can’t be your best if you are not in your happy place.

Places to Find, Happiness

  • Taking a walk in nature, either on the beach or in the park. When I lived in Toronto, and it was cold outside, I would take a drive,
  • Watch a funny movie and laugh till I cried,
  • Read a love story.
  • You have to know your happy place and go there often.
  • When you play and laugh with abandon, you enter into the present moment, which is the only place where you can experience happiness.

Sources to Radiate Happiness on the, Happiness Wheel

Unconditional love – Love is a spiritual emotion. Physiology has a truly alarming statistic that states that if a mother gives up on a child he or she becomes truly lost. If the entire world gives up on him or her the child would still have hope; but if the mother is still supporting him, regardless of how many people write him/her off, that child can change and turn his or her life around.

That is why God hard wired unconditional love into mothers. The Disney movie Maleficent does an awesome job with this theory with the love of a mother substitute! The message, the only true love is the love of a mother! I love Angelina, she is my hero. When you love unconditionally, you access your spiritual realm and, radiate happiness, from the inside out. The object of your love is able to feel that love and revel in it.

Unconditional love on the, Happiness Wheel

When we don’t practice unconditional love, we experience pain, doubt, and unhappiness. We can’t get on the, happiness wheel.  Love isn’t a capricious emotion but is a state of being. It is an experience of unity with all creation. In spirit we are pure love.

We don’t have to search outside ourselves for love, because love is our essence.” David Simon

Soundcloud Transform your mind podcast
Transform your Mind Soundcloud podcast

Meditation– Allows us to tap into your own inexhaustible source of inner peace, fulfillment, spiritual development, personal development and self- awareness. The essence of meditation is experiencing our innate wholeness, the unity of our body, mind, and spirit. True, happiness, is an internal state of consciousness that allows us to be happy for no reason at all.

We score high on the, happiness wheel. It is independent of the circumstances, events, people, and things in our lives. This happiness comes from the realization that our true self isn’t our body, thoughts, emotions, personality, possessions, accomplishments, relationships, or any other time-bound attribute. Our essential nature is pure, unbounded consciousness, also known as the field of all possibilities.

The attributes of this, happiness wheel,

  • include happiness,
  • love, timelessness,
  • compassion,
  • creativity,
  • wisdom,
  • silence,
  • and grace.

Replace Fear with Love – One of the clouds that obscure our innate state of, happiness, and block our spiritual awakening is unnecessary fear and anxiety. This fear is a negative emotion that causes anxiety, inflammation and pain. The root cause of this fear.

Sponsor The Transform Your Mind Podcast
Sponsor The Transform Your Mind Podcast

Fear causes us not to be on the, Happiness Wheel

Some of the symptoms of fear are:

  • afraid of rejection,
  • failure,
  • intimacy,
  • embarrassment,
  • abandonment,
  • loss,
  • the unknown,
  • being judged,
  • being alone,
  • losing control,
  • expressing our true feelings, and so many other things.

Spiritual Life Coaching can help you release the grip that fear has on you by expanding your awareness to the pure potentiality of your true self and nature, which is infinite, whole, and unbounded.

Transform Your Mind iHeart Radio
iHeart Radio

Become Conscious – In my book “Becoming Conscious, My Awakening” I write about becoming conscious of my spirituality, becoming conscious of Synchro-destiny, a term this is used to label that every moment is as it should be, and that there are no coincidences in life.

Everything is preordained. When you accept this fact, then you will live more in the moment because you realize that in this moment is where miracles happen. The bible says “seek and you will find” if you look for the miracles of life, you will find them and then you will radiate on the, happiness wheel, from the inside out.

Just as a radiant sunrise can be hidden behind the clouds, our inner, happiness, can become obscured by constricted awareness, limiting thought patterns, and emotional turmoil. Yet no matter how long we have been lost in fear and limitation, we can learn to rise above the clouds of conditioning and awaken to the source of happiness within us.

 

Additional Resources 

How to be Happy: The Happiness Formula

3 Ways to Find Happiness After a Divorce

 

How to Find Hardcore Happiness and True Success

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The Power and Purpose of Journalling

 

Journalling, can help women experiencing problems who are feeling stuck to form solutions by writing their down. My guest today is Margaret Elizabeth Hulse, a novelist who uses her fine art and jewelry designs to illustrate her, journalling, stories. Margaret writes stories with her body, mind, spirit that she says exist in the beauty of Texas, the Caribbean, and New Orleans.

Journalling, can be inspired to transcend from the monotony of day to day, obligatory tasks and into a life life filled with passion and purpose from the power and purpose of, journalling. She says “I write relatable, yet sensual, passionate stories that take my readers on new adventures and create custom jewelry so that the wearer has something unique to set her apart from the typical, ‘go-to’ designs. I evoke an excitement that people feel they haven’t been able to tap into for a while, whether it’s because they’ve been hurt, or have simply lost themselves as they’ve tried to make ends meet.”

Transform your Mind Stitcher
Transform your Mind Stitcher

How to Start Journaling

Margaret feels that through, journalling, she learned how to manifest her dream work through writing her way out of a trauma. Her first published journal simply titled, “Sketchbook,” is an illustrated short story that serves as a preamble to her novel, Sketches from the Heart of a Texas Artist. I write and speak often about the power of healing through creativity and how the more you write about something, the more likely it is to come to fruition.

On a personal note on, how to start journalling, I have always journaled to download and to write down my goals and dreams. The power and purpose for my, journalling, for me has been manifested in my life over and over.

There are 3 ways to attract anything into your life. First you think it in your mind, then you speak it into the atmosphere, then you write it down to give it form!

Journalling, can also help you out of a bad mood.
You Can Write Your Way Out of an Emotional Funk. Here’s How.

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Download on Spotify

A, journalling, story:

James Pennebaker, a distinguished professor at the University of Texas, got married right out of college in the early ‘70s. Three years after his marriage, he and his wife started to question their relationship, and Pennebaker, confused and unsettled, sank into a depression. He ate less, drank more, and started smoking. Embarrassed by what he saw as emotional weakness, he became more and more isolated.

One morning about a month into this decline, Pennebaker climbed out of bed and sat down at a typewriter. He stared at the machine for a moment, then started writing freely and frankly about his marriage, his parents, his sexuality, his career, and even death.

As he wrote, and continued to write in the days that followed, something fascinating happened. His depression lifted and he felt liberated. He began to reconnect with his deep love for his wife. But the writing had an even farther-reaching impact. For the first time, he started to see the purpose and possibilities in his life.

Pennebaker’s own experience with, journalling, helped him get through this rocky period sparked 40 years of research about the links between writing and emotional processing. Over and over again Pennebaker did studies in which he divided people into two groups and asked some to, journal,  about emotionally significant experiences, and the others to write about common things: their shoes, or maybe the cars passing on the street. Both groups wrote for the same span—about 20-minutes a day, three days in a row.

In each study, Pennebaker found that the people who wrote about emotionally charged episodes experienced marked improvement in their physical and mental well-being. They were happier, less depressed and less anxious. In the months after the, journalling,  sessions, they had lower blood pressure, improved immune function, and fewer visits to the doctor. They also reported better relationships, improved memory, and more success at work.

How to become a Life coach

Is your purpose in life to help others achieve fulfillment in theirs?

Then maybe becoming a Life Coach is the career for you.

Email me at info@myhelps.us for your FREE copy of my eBook “How to become a Life coach”

Additional Resources

How to Heal Your Brokenness

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How to Overcome Fear and Find Joy

Fear, is an, energy, and thoughts are the most powerful, energy,  force in the universe.  Thoughts can be either positive or negative.
Heading up the rear of, negative thoughts, is, fear. It is the bottom feeder or all the emotions.
If you allow, fear, to linger in your body and in your mind, It will not only attract the thing you, fear, the most into your experience; but it will also bring disease to your body.
All diseases can be traced back to, negative thoughts, or, fear. Negative thoughts, transform your body into an acidic state.

Fear, is a, negative thought, magnified to the 1000th degree.

In, fear,  mode your body is activated in the fight or flight mode.
Your body tenses, your breathing is shallow, your heart palpitates, your blood pressure is elevated, your hands and body sweat.
Not a good place to dwell!
Unfortunately, your brain cannot detect the difference between your imagination and reality, so the person in the grip of fear cannot tell the difference. They cannot tell that, fear, it is “False Evidence Appearing Real.”

Using Positive Energy to banish Fear

Today I want to teach you how to use, positive energy, to clear the, negative energy, of, fear. But first I want to review one of the Spiritual Laws of the Universe.

“The Law of Sowing and Reaping“

We all know of the physical laws like, Gravity.
Some laws are physical and some are Spiritual and quantum.
Understanding the spiritual “Law of Sowing and reaping” can change your world.
Understanding that whatever you create it in the spiritual world of your thoughts will manifest in the physical world.

Put another way, that means whatever you plant in the fertile soil of your mind, will manifest in your physical world.
Just like planting an apple tree. Except that in the spiritual world;

The soil is your mind, The seeds are your thoughts,
The water are your actions,
And The sun is your feelings.

If you allow, fear, to dwell in your heart and mind every day you will manifest an apple orchard in your reality.

Energy flows where Attention Goes

Whatever you focus on expands.

Fear is Negative Energy

Everything is, energy, and all, energy, attracts similar energies.
You can’t put out, negative energy, and expect positive results.
You can’t plant apple trees and expect oranges.

Likewise, you can’t focus on what you, fear, and produce a successful result.
If you are constantly thinking of the things you, fear, you are planting a seed and based in the universal Law of Reaping and Sowing, it must germinate.
The mind or consciousness is connected to reality.
Think of something strong enough or long enough to and it will eventually manifest in your reality.
These are six words you must stamp on your mind

“You become what you think about”

When you realize that your mind is a garden you will begin to plant only the things you desire.

How to overcome fear

Exercise: How to overcome fear, write down something that is opposite of what you, fear, and start giving it the same attention you have been giving your, fear.
Since light conquers darkness, it will eventually have your, fear, for lunch!

  • Imagine you having fun traveling the world in crystal clear clarity.
  • Say daily affirmations that compliments your desire.
  • Visualize your goal so much that sometimes you are not sure what is imagined and what is reality;
  • the same way that you let fear take you out of reality.
  • Don’t get disappointed if it takes time to perfect this. Remember that positive things take time to manifest,
  • it is the negative ones that show up quickly.

Weeds will sprout up, negative thoughts, of failure will sprout up.
So, every morning find the weeds and dig them up.

Remember a successful gardener will always cultivate his land.

Cultivate your mind for success.
Life is energy, whatever you put out, is returned to you.
The mind does not care what seeds you plant; it will always return what you plant.
You can plant wealth or you can plant poverty.
You can plant fear or you can plant happiness.

Here is an excerpt from the book: The Wise Heart: A Guide to the Universal Teachings of Buddhist Psychology:
The Buddha faced plenty of his own fear and terror of imminent death. This is a passage from the Buddha’s early writings that Jack Kornfield, a teacher who helped introduce Buddhist mindfulness practice to the West, quotes in his book.

How would it be if in the dark of the month, with no moon, I were to enter the most strange and frightening places, near tombs and in the thick of the forest, that I might come to understand fear and terror. And doing so, a wild animal would approach or the wind rustle the leaves and I would think, “Perhaps the fear and terror now comes.” And being resolved to dispel the hold of that fear and terror, I remained in whatever posture it arose, sitting or standing, walking or lying down. I did not change until I had faced that fear and terror in that very posture, until I was free of its hold upon me … And having this thought, I did so. By facing the, fear, and terror I became free.

Do not Fear: Definition of fear

Fear – False objects appearing real, as per the about passage, can be released by standing your ground. Our instinctive reaction to, fear, is to turn and run because as humans we are hard wired to run from pain and towards pleasure. But, as the Buddha teaches in the passage above if you stand and have the courage to not move, you become free you, let go of fear, and realize that your imagination is always worse than the reality.

Let me share a personal story on how I overcame, fear and, remove negative energy from home. 

When I first came to the United States of America, I came as a business owner. I did not have any of the benefits of a permanent resident. As my business was building, I decided to earn money as a sales person selling vacations. I was not authorized to work in the US, so I became very fearful of being found out and being deported. Every night I would dream that the immigration officials would come to my house and take me away in handcuffs. Sometimes I would dream that they would throw me in the back of the trunk.

One day, my pastor preached a sermon on, the fear factor. He said that God promises to carry your burdens, so give them to God. He said when you give your, fears, and heavy loads to God, you can’t worry or take them back because that would mean that you don’t have faith in God’s promise to carry them. He asked the congregation to write our, fears, and heavy burdens on a piece of paper and ceremoniously throw them at the alter giving them to God. I wrote my, fear, of being deported on a piece of paper and threw in on the alter. In doing so, I, let go of fear, and became free because I gave it away to someone else, God. The good news is that I no longer was afraid of anything. Every time something came up that would potentially me fearful, I would face it and know that it will work out for my good. I stood on the scripture “I know the plans I have for you, plans to prosper you.”

Meditation to Let go of Fear

Sit quietly in a chair, be comfortable.
Place feet flat on the floor, hands clasped in your lap. Close your eyes. Be present. Focus on your breathing, feel your belly rise and fall under your clasped hands.
Breathe in for a count of 4 and breathe out for account of 6. Thus, slowing down your rhythmic cycles. Be mindful of the air as it passes through your nostrils down your esophagus and into your abdomen. If your mind wanders off bring it back gently to your breathe. Your mind can only concentrate on one thing at a time. Concentrating on your breathe bypasses your mind. Once you slow your cycles and quiet your mind, you are now in the receptive mode to change your programming.

Think briefly about something you, fear. Today we will use as our example the, fear of flying. Today we are going to use our imagination to replicate the experience of flying while you are sitting comfortably and safely in your chair.

Let’s begin. visualize you are at the airport with your loved ones, your husband and 2 children. You are on your way to Venice, Italy. You chose Venice because you wanted a romantic vacation with your husband. You can’t wait to ride on the Gondolas and be serenaded with live music, going to the opera and have the experience of taking a water taxi everywhere. You are excited. This energy is positive. You let this feeling of euphoria wash over you, you feel your body tingle with this positive energy. You feel good!
Now you are boarding the plane, you are starting to feel a little anxious. You board the plane and find your seat, you buckle yourself in. The pilot announces that your flight time is 6 hours and that he will be flying at a cruising altitude of 35,000 feet. He advises you to give your attention the flight attendant and pay attention to the safety information. You mentally note your exits. You listen to what to do in the event of a water landing! Your mind is going nuts with fear. Your heart starts to palpitate rapidly, you start to sweat.

Now the airplane is taxing down the runway at full speed, then lifts off the ground.
You squeeze your husband’s hand, you are hardly breathing, your whole body is tight. The plane is climbing it shakes a little. You are so scared the sweat starts dripping from your forehead. The plane reaches cruising altitude, the pilot turns off the fasten seat belt sign and people start moving about the plane. You calm down a little, but still aware of every movement of the plane. The flight attendants come around and offer beverages. You ask for a glass of wine. You drink it down in one gulp! You start to feel calmer. The flight is uneventful. After what seems like an eternity the pilot announces that in 30 minutes he will be starting his descent into Venice. Your fear returns, the plane shakes a little as it descends and you are once again in the grip of fear. The plane touches down and speeds down the runway braking speed. Your body is tight, your breathing shallow. Then it is all over. You faced your fear and came out on the other side! You exit the plane and you are in Venice!

I want you now to realize that you have taken your first flight in your mind.
I want you to realize that fear is false evidence appearing real.
I want you to realize that once you face your fear, like a bully, it backs down.
I want you to realize that the energy of fear is keeping you stuck.
I want you to realize that whatever your fear, just like we took a ride on an airplane and came out alive on the other side that is how all fear works. It has no real power over you. The only thing that is holding you back from doing the things you want to do is all in your mind. So, the only way the clear it is to start with the mind. Do a dress rehearsal in the mind and then do it in the physical.

The first step in How to overcome fear is to face the fear.

The second step is to clear it from the place it is planted in your mind. Take a moment now to ask your higher self where the fear of flying came from. When was the fear planted? When you get the answer, you may think to yourself, boy that was silly or you may have a legitimate reason to be afraid of flying. Someone you know could have died in a plane crash or you yourself could have been in a plane emergency landing. The thing to remember is that you know that every time you drive on the highway you could die and you are aware of thousands of people who have died in car accidents; yet few people have a fear of driving in a car.
So, consciousness is the second step.

The third step is to clear that energy by replacing it with, positive energy. We are going to use the, positive energy, of gratitude. Sit comfortably again. Imagine a bright light entering the crown of your head moving down through your check, down your throat to your chest, down your abdomen through your feet.
Feel this light fill all your energy centers as you become fully relaxed. Now expand this energy out from your chest past the room, past your city, past your country, past the clouds, past the sun, past the planet into the stratosphere. You are now floating in cyberspace. If you can bring your fear to mind in this space, do so now.

Then replace that feeling of fear with the feeling of gratitude. Gratitude that you are alive, gratitude that you are in your sound mind, gratitude that you have a place to sleep and food to eat. Gratitude that you are wealthier than 95% of the people in the world and you have the resources to travel to exotic destinations. Gratitude that you will not let fear rob you of your joy.
Now set the intention to fly to the first place on your bucket list within the year.

If you found this post helpful, I would love to hear your comments on what your fears are, and if you achieved a successful result transferring it with these exercises. Please share this podcast and blog post with friends and family and remember to subscribe and post a review.
Transform your Mind podcast is giving away a Free Checklist you can do every morning to replace your fears with positive affirmations.
To receive please subscribe, rate and review this podcast then send me an email to info@myhelps.us with the subject line iTunes review.
Until next time Namaste

Additional Resources

No Fear : How to Live with Courage

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How to Find Hardcore Happiness and True Success

How to become an open communicator

Research shows that, hardcore happiness, leads to a wide range of benefits for our performance, health, relationships and more. So, rather than success being the key to, hardcore happiness, research shows that, happiness, could in fact be the key to success. Indeed, hardcore happiness, also brings substantial benefits for society as a whole. For example, a review of more than 160 studies found “clear and compelling evidence” that happier people have better overall health and live longer than their less happy peers.

Welcome to the Mindset Transformation blog and podcast with Coach Myrna Young. Today my guest is Swami Brahmananda Saraswati. Swami G as he is affectionately called, has a mission to help over one million people find, Hardcore Happiness, and true success. He has designed a master class on How to find hardcore happiness and true success.

  • At the end of the, hardcore happiness,  training you will have learned:
    How to find your purpose,
  • How to live your life to the fullest and achieve happiness here and now,
  • without having to wait/delay or postpone feeling vibrantly alive every day!

In keeping with the theme of my podcast and blog, I always like to leave you with a tip of the week from Coach Myrna.

Finding Hardcore Happiness from Fulfillment

This week my tip of the week comes from the book by Deepak Chopra, The 7 Levels of Fulfillment.

Happiness comes from fulfillment, Deepak Chopra’s book the 7 Levels of Fulfillment, references 7 ways to find happiness from fulfillment.

In order for us to find fulfillment we must be Open and Activate or awaken our inner sources of calm, love, and truth,
Spiritual awakening is natural. The process is like waking up in the morning and opening your eyes to the light.
There are, seven levels of Fulfillment, When you are fully connected to the light of being which is the light of the self.
There is a light that shines beyond all things on earth, beyond the highest heavens,
This is the light that shines within you.

1: The First level of fulfillment is pure potentiality
2: The 2nd level is Fulfillment from Giving
3: The 3rd level is Fulfillment from Sowing and Reaping
4: The 4th level is Fulfillment from Love
5: The 5th level is Fulfillment from The Desires of your Heart
6: The 6th level is Fulfillment from Detachment
7: the 7th level Fulfillment from being on purpose

Soundcloud Transform your mind podcast
Transform your Mind Soundcloud podcast

Introduction to Using Meditation to find Happiness

• Swami Brahmananda Saraswati was raised in India and at age 4 began studying with ascended masters in an ashram in the Himalayas. By age 12 he was teaching, yoga, and, meditation,  at the ashram’s yoga school. In 2009 Swami left India to study pre-medicine at a university in Iowa: Maharishi University of Management. He has taught 1000s of people yoga, meditation, and Ayurveda. Now he wants to bring happiness to an even larger audience. Swami is warm and gentle teacher full of light and enthusiasm.

He was taught powerful practices that have been independently validated by science to be beneficial to human health including stress reduction, enhanced well-being, creativity and productivity. His compassionate and knowledgeable approach to teaching allows full spectrum learning. He says often we have 100% freedom and 100% responsibility, and this world is dominated by action. Through his teachings and exercises many people have transformed their lives by improving their health and helping them become more deeply connected to themselves.

In this podcast Swami G answers the following questions:

• What is happiness?/ How do I know if I’m happy?

Happiness, is an emotional state characterized by feelings of joy, satisfaction, contentment, and, fulfillment. While happiness has many different definitions, it is often described as involving positive emotions and life satisfaction.

Because, hardcore happiness, tends to be such a broadly defined term, psychologists and other social scientists typically use the term ‘subjective well-being’ when they talk about this emotional state. Just as it sounds, subjective well-being tends to focus on an individual’s overall personal feelings about their life in the present.

Transform your Mind TuneIn Radio
TuneIn Radio

• Why does happiness matter?

Research shows that, hardcore happiness, leads to a wide range of benefits for our performance, health, relationships and more. So, rather than success being the key to, hardcore happiness, research shows that, happiness, could in fact be the key to success. Indeed, hardcore happiness, also brings substantial benefits for society as a whole. For example, a review of more than 160 studies found “clear and compelling evidence” that happier people have better overall health and live longer than their less happy peers.

The sad truth is that in recent decades we have become substantially richer but no happier. We have reached the point where mental health is one of our greatest social challenges – causing more of the suffering in our society than either unemployment or poverty. This is why increasing numbers of policymakers and leaders are now calling for measures of progress to be based on human wellbeing and happiness, not just economic factors such as growth in GDP.

• Does the Happiness Formula work for everyone

The, happiness formula, does work for everyone. Here is the formula. Seligman soon came up with a formula for happiness, H=S+C+V, where happiness (H) is the sum of a person’s genetic capacity for happiness (S), their circumstances (C), and factors under their voluntary control (V)

So Let me ask you this question. Are you Happy?

If you are struggling with Anxiety, depression, career issues, relationship issues, work/life balance, performance & productivity enhancement?
Then this training is for you .

Are you longing to feel happy in life?
Are you tired of living an uninspired, unenergized and luke-warm life?

If you are ready to live the life of your dreams, and find, hardcore happiness, feel in control, fulfilled and driven with purpose then head over to nakedmoment.com where Swami Brahmananda will help you to find the missing pieces and become the person you were born to be.

You deserve, happiness, and you CAN attain it. With Swami’s guidance and the power of an entire community of, happiness seekers,  you too can wake up happy.

Don’t know what your perfect life looks like?
Can’t seem to get out of your own way?
Always feel down, filled with fear or guilt?
Do you feel like your environment isn’t supporting you?

Stop feeling like there is no way out. There’s one clear step to take to find, hardcore happiness, and right now if you head over to nakedmoment.com/transform there will be some amazing free bonuses for you to get a head start on your happiness journey. Don’t wait. Join a growing community and get happy.

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Bonus Gift!
For all my listeners who sign up for the Happiness training, send me an email to info@myhelps.us and I will send you a bonus gift of my “Mindset Shift Focus Wheel workbook” You need a mindset shift in order to be happy in the present moment regardless of your circumstance.

If you found this blog post and podcast inspiring, please subscribe, rate and review and also share with your friends.

Additional Resources

How to be Happy: The Happiness Formula

3 Ways to Find Happiness After a Divorce

 

How to Find Happiness After a Tough Year

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How to Find Beauty in Your Now!

Finding Beauty in your now

Finding, beauty, in your Now is the point of all power that unlocks healing, growth, strength, peace, desires, success, and happiness.

This week I interview Aireka Harvell, aspiring motivational speaker who focuses on transforming the minds and lives of women with her blog “Be That Woman.” She is also the Founder of Nodat Place Advertising LLC. where she encourages and promotes female entrepreneurship and offers daily motivation and support through her social media platforms.

Introduction  “How to find Beauty in your Now”

Aireka has a powerful story of overhearing a mother telling her son that she was, ugly, and seeing her mom treat he brother better because he was handsome when  she was just 9 years old. That tag stayed with her throughout her life and gave birth to low self esteem, becoming a people pleaser and allowing her husband to mentally and physically abuse her. Aireka has lived in darkness of thinking she was, ugly, for most of her life, until one day she heard the voice of God telling her to Help other women “Be That Woman” he made them to be.

Today she has a huge following on Instagram and on her blog and offers Hope and Encouragement with her daily posts.

Listen to find out How to control your mind and bring it under subjection when thoughts of fear and hopelessness threaten to stomp out your joy.

Learn that there is opportunity to learn and grow from every situation.

Soundcloud Transform your mind podcast
Transform your Mind Soundcloud podcast

What is Beauty in the eyes of God

The tip of the week from Coach Myrna is an except from the book The University of Success by Og Mandino

A Conversation with our manufacturer (God)
God: Tell me “what is your purpose down there on earth”

Man: Well you know “I want to work hard and not hurt anyone, and I want to get along with folks and stay out of trouble”
God: “But what about your talents”

Man: Well what talents I have and there are not much, I take good care of. I kind of pace myself, you know.
No, No,No God shouted, your answers are all wrong. Don’t you remember the story of the talents?

Man: Yes I think so … You gave each of three men a different set of talents. To one man, you gave five talents. To another man, you gave two talents. And to the third, you gave but one talent.

“That’s right says God: and some years later I checked up on each of these three men. I was pleased to find that the man with five talents had multiplied his talents by working hard, and applying each one. The man whom I gave two talents had also labored hard and multiplied them. But when I checked with the man I had only given one talent, I became very angry. For that man had buried his talent in the name of protecting it. To which I cursed him saying “thou wicked and slothful servant” how dare you not use the gifts and, beauty, I gave you. You Knew that I reap where I have not sown and gather where I scattered no seed.
Do you not get the point of this parable?

Man: Yes I think so. I am to use the talents and, beauty, you gave me and multiply them to help others.

God: Let me ask you another question
“Who is in charge of your life?”

Man: I am responsible for my life – but with a few exceptions. I mean sometimes you just don’t get the breaks, you know. Sometimes things just don’t go my way, but that is the way the ball bounces or the way the cookie crumbles”

God jumped to his feet “No, No, No, he shouted. You were created in my image of, beauty. “When will you learn, you are totally responsible for your life, no exceptions. You are totally responsible for the results you obtain. Not your mother, not your father, not your boss. It’s not the breaks, that control your life, it’s you. Don’t ever say that is the way the ball bounces, that it is the way the cookie crumbles. You must bounce your own ball!

Man: Okay, okay I think I see. The fact is that I have been put on earth to succeed, I have an obligation, a responsibility, to use my abilities to the fullest. I must control my life, for I wasn’t designed to be led. I prefer excellence to mediocrity. I won’t prevent my own success, for all success requires is that I am here, and that I use my talents to the world and not wait for the world to come to me. And I will act now, no matter how convenient waiting may seem, no matter how imperfect might be the results I obtain.
Tears welled up in God’s eyes, a smile creased his face.

God: “Thou wonderful and faithful servant, take all the love and energy and talent that you have and share it. Share it with all you meet, until it seems you have no more to give, there will always be more and more in reserve. Your potential extends beyond your wildest imaginings. The only limitations you will ever face will be those you place on yourself”

Transform your Mind Spotify Podcast
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How to find Beauty in everyday moments

Johanna Sevier Robb says in her blog post on “How to find the Beauty in Everyday Present Moments”:

There is so much, beauty, in the world—and because this crazy, gorgeous life is so fleeting, I want to focus on the, beauty.

No, I won’t turn my eyes away from the horrors of the world. But I also won’t become so consumed by these horrors that I no longer notice the wind dancing on the water. Or the tender grasp of my lover. Or the plant on the windowsill stretching toward the sunlight.

I’m not trying to downplay the crap. But just to understand the, beauty standards, of men. I don’t want to crumple into a small, powerless mess each and every time I read the news.

Negativity sells. Sensationalism sells. But this is not the reality of, beauty. So I ask, what is beauty?

Sure, man’s, beauty standards, is real. But generosity, kindness, humility and love is also real. And I still believe in humanity. Only a tiny bit of the present world can be summed up by violence and acts of terror. Only a tiny bit of human history can be summed up by wars and acts of cruelty.

How to Find your Beauty even if the world thinks you are ugly

Despite his physical appearance, the elephant man  and his mother were close.  His mother did not think he was, ugly. A former housemaid, she was also handicapped and had three additional children, two of whom died at a young age. She herself passed away in 1873 of pneumonia. Her death devastated young Joseph. Not only did he lose his closest friend, but his father, now working as a haberdasher, soon married the strict widow Emma Wood Antill who had two children of her own and demanded young Merrick, elephant man,  leave school and earn his living. Amazingly, despite his growing abnormalities, he found employment at a cigar shop, but his right hand soon became too large to manage the delicate work of rolling cigars. In order to earn his keep, his father got Joseph a hawker’s license to sell gloves door to door. But his, ugly,  appearance frightened prospective customers and his sales were dismal. Joseph Senior would often beat his son if he came home empty-handed and the stepmother would deny him full meals unless he had earned enough to pay for them. As a result, he ran away — or rather walked away — from home more than once.

~

How to Become a Life Coach

If you liked this content remember to share, subscribe to my iTunes podcast and write a review. Once you do, send me an email to info@myhelps.us with the subject line “Podcast review” and I will send you one of two gifts. My eBook “How to become a Life Coach” or a “Mindset Shift Focus Wheel” a workbook to change from a Fixed Mindset to a Growth Mindset.

Additional Resources

Life Coaching part 1: Who am I

 

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Can Reality Transurfing Improve your Life

What is Reality Transurfing

Renee Garcia teaches what is, reality transurfing, and how we can use it to improve our frequency, our thoughts and alternate reality.

Listen to the full interview here:

Renée is a lifelong entrepreneur, a Certified Reality Transurfing instructor, and an Alternatives Space adventurer – endorsed by Vadim Zeland the author and creator of, Reality Transurfing.

Having ventured deeply into the metaphysical world of Reality Creation she has transformed personal failure into success, poverty into abundance, sickness into healing, and a bleak worldview into one brimming with joy and magic. Renée has employed, Reality Transurfing, to discover fulfillment, true purpose in life and connect with the highest version of herself.

With a self-built practical methodology and magical wand in hand, she is now empowering others around the world to do so the same.

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What was your journey into the self development and reality transurfing space?

Renee – I don’t want to say I had  an unfortunate childhood or an unfortunate background because I later used my background to help other people.  I now view all the parts of my life that I was ashamed of or I didn’t like or I felt disadvantaged, as data to help my, transurfing, clients understand reality jumping. 

All of that stuff that happened in my childhood really helped me in gaining success for myself. I had achieved a good deal of success for myself given that I wasn’t college educated. I didn’t even graduate from high school. 

I managed to start my own business and gained success. I had this outward-facing image that a lot of people perceived as successful; but I was very damaged inside.  reality transurfing, helped me to connect with and the void of these things and sort of broke me in what I call my pre-transurfing reality. 

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Reality Transurfing allow you to choose your reality

Reality transurfing, started for me when I was about 35 years old.  I woke up one morning and realized that I was utterly miserable. So I decided to take some pretty bold steps. I disconnected from life as I knew it in the big city.  I gave up my business, moved out to the country and just went inward for about a year searching for answers. 

It was at this time that I found,  reality transurfing. This was about six years ago. I was not from a world of, self-development, or, self-help.  I had gone to conventional therapy for a number of years just to get over some of my childhood trauma and, poverty mentality. 

A lot from my mindset was holding me back; but when I found,  reality transurfing, it was completely new knowledge,  completely new information to me. I immediately saw what I had done to get myself into that place where life broke me. 

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Where Reality Surfing originated

Reality transurfing, is very big in Russia where the knowledge originated about 15 years ago.  I saw massive transformation in my mindset, my worldview, my outlook on life, my success, everything. 

I  decided right then that I was going to help others change their mindset with, reality transurfing. 

It was at this time that I found,  reality transurfing. This was about six years ago. I was not from a world of, self-development, or, self-help.  I had gone to conventional therapy for a number of years just to get over some of my childhood trauma and, poverty mentality. 

A lot from my mindset was holding me back; but when I found,  reality transurfing, it was completely new knowledge,  completely new information to me. I immediately saw what I had done to get myself into that place where life broke me. 

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCM9BB90P-BgZzrlfSGxNSXA

Reality Transurfing Communities

Renee – That’s all sort of developing now and it’s really fascinating the types of people that come into the, reality transurfing, community.  There are a number of people I certified as, transurfing instructors.   There are psychologists in Mexico using, reality transurfing, as a tool. 

Lots of therapists and lots of psychologists, people that are involved in the more metaphysical side of of self-development are using, reality transurfing. It’s kind of like quantum physics meets therapy so it’s appealing. 

We like to say that it’s, the law of attraction, for smart people.  It’s a much more evolved version of the, law of attraction, with all the blank spots filled in. We obviously know that there’s something to law of attraction; but why does, law of attraction, work? Reality transurfing,  fills in all those why’s of why law of attraction works. 

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What is Reality Transurfing?

Renee – Reality transurfing,  essentially means surfing multiple realities.  What I’m talking about is, quantum jumping. So what does, quantum jumping, mean?   The best way for me to describe it and make it relatable and understandable for everyone is to use myself as an example. 

I told you that I had an unfortunate childhood.  There was trauma there, I didn’t graduate from high school,  I didn’t go to college. That is a version of reality that is available to me. 

But I’m sitting here talking to you on a podcast right where I’m an expert on, reality transurfing,  I’m an expert on a self-development book that was written in Russia and kind of exotic, I’m leading a movement of people and I’m considered a thought leader.  I’m on the cutting edge of a self-development technology and people want me to come on their podcasts and people want me to give seminars and people want to fly me around and have me speak on stage. 

So this is an alternate version of reality that I’ve accessed using the concepts in the, reality transurfing, book.  We use this analogy to explain the, transurfing, modality of turning a dial on a television or a radio, like changing the channel.  

Our power as creators to be able to choose which channel we turn to. 

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Imagine your Future and Your Reality

Myrna – This morning I was listening to Dr Joe Dispenza on a podcast and he was talking about something very similar to this.  He said to imagine the future you want and shift your reality to believe you already have it. 

If something is bugging you right now or you’re angry or maybe you’re looking at past trauma, one way to change the channel  is to think about what you’re dreaming of in the future. 

Renee -Yes we can play victim that channel doesn’t bring happiness,  that channel brings victimhood.  

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Core Concepts of Transurfing

There are 11 core concepts of, transurfing. If you were to adopt just one concept from the, reality transurfing, modality it will help you to see reality in a different way. 

Myrna – Awesome let’s talk about the core concepts or core modalities of, reality transurfing. 

Renee – I’ll describe the first five.  There’s 11 core concepts and if you split them right down the middle, the first five concepts represent a donut hole. This hole signifies you’re not living your best life.  You’re irritated, you don’t like the state of affairs in the world,  you don’t like USA politics etc.  You are depressed, maybe have anxiety and don’t feel your life has meaning. 

The first five concepts of, reality transurfing, are going to help you get up out of that hole. The next five, transurfing, concepts are going to help you build a foundation and a new structure. 

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Transurfing Steps

  • The first step in, transurfing,  is to help you develop your connection with this alternative reality and realize that you can create from it. 
  • The second step is to get off entities that have adhered to you that are draining you energetically or spiritually.  The biggest one right now is politics and the media that has rendered people almost comatose.

That’s where fear lives. Pendulums use fear as their number one hook. 

  • Step three is defeating pendulums or learning how to manage your pendulums.

When you do that and you are successful. You’ve got a good connection with the alternative space, you understand what pendulums create your reality for you and you take back your energy from those pendulums. 

  • The fourth step is what we refer to as the wave of success. 

The wave of success is a phenomenon in the, transurfing, modality where you accumulate positive thoughts, actions, and frequency from your environment to improve your thoughts about yourself. 

Life Tracks and Quantum Jumping

Life tracks are like different channels that you can turn to in the, quantum jumping, space.  The idea is that you use the law of physics with energy and your perception of reality to essentially move you to some of these higher life tracks or higher channels. More of what you want exists in abundance in this alternative reality. 

  • The fifth step is the opposite of the wave of success. Our intention is to climb higher on the life tracks or tune the dial to a higher channel.  We call this induced transition. Induced transition is when you buy into negative information or negative news.  This is when you buy into people’s negative thoughts or views of you or what you’re doing.

This is you tuning to a lower channel,  so the induced transition is sort of the concept that keeps a, transurfer, in check.  You become aware of energy and how it affects your mood health. 

Myrna – Just this morning I was listening to Dr Joe Dispenza’s on a podcast and he was talking about using the wave of energy from your Heart and taking it up to your brain so you are living in a higher frequency. 

Then you will attract the things you want.  Exactly the same thing you’re talking about here. 

How can Transurfing help us create our own reality?

Renee – People have heard about the, quantum field, but nobody understood it. So now we are filling in the blanks. People are not going to irritate you, you are going to get angry. But you can clean your layer of reality. 

If you’ve got negative energy you can’t create, you have to be in that positive frame of mind to create. Joe dispenza was talking about that energy wave going from the heart to the mind.  We call this heart and mind coordination and this is a big part of, reality transurfing. 

It’s the heart saying yes to something and then it’s the mind agreeing.  This is what Vadim Zealand,  reality transurfing, author did to create this book.  

What is quantum jumping exactly

Renee –  Quantum jumping, is  pretty much switching the channels.  We use all sorts of analogies, like a river analogy. Quantum jumping,  you can get caught into different streams and navigate to different places. We say  quantum jumping, or changing the channel. 

There’s a four-step process to, quantum jumping. 

  1.  Acknowledge and this is where your connection with the alternative space will come in. You have to acknowledge that this version of reality does in fact exist.
  2. You have to tune your thoughts.  Just as there are infinite versions of reality,  there are also infinite versions of self.  You must envision what the optimal version of yourself looks like. There’s a version of myself that feels depressed and traumatized by childhood. Maybe I’m addicted to drugs.  But I choose to focus on the optimal version of myself as a thought leader and an expert on, reality transurfing. 
  3. Take action in that direction, so you’re thinking like the optimal version of you. Practice until you are perfect. 
  4. The final step is to make sure that your frequency matches the frequency of that higher version of you.  Remove things that take away or are detrimental to your frequency like alcohol,  drugs, fast food, and media.  Things that can improve your frequency are exercise and meditation. 

Myrna – I love Abraham Hicks teachings on vibration and frequencies.  I didn’t know anything about, transurfing, and, quantum jumping, but I do know about frequency and the law of attraction.  

Conclusion 

Tell our listeners and readers how they can connect with you. 

We have a thriving community. We have knowledge for everyone so if you don’t have even the money to buy the book,  you can watch the YouTube channel transurfing. You can also connect on our Facebook group  It is called the International Transurfing Institute.

www.transsurfing.us is the website if you would like to find out information on any aspect of, reality transurfing.  What it is, how to do it. 

 

We have a course on teachable called reality transurfing 2.0.  It is the only certified course by the author for the english language.  

 

Book The seed of life
Book The seed of life

The Science-Fiction/Fantasy novel, The Seed of Life is now available on Amazon. This book features strong female leads at the forefront of their planet’s defense militia.

At just 23 years old Kameclara achieved her childhood dream of becoming an operative of the Intergalactic Military. Their main task is protecting their home planet Teroma.

This mission afforded them the chance of finding another place more like home;  her team is taken into the fold of the planet’s deepest secrets. They learn their system contains nine planets, not the seven they were taught in school.

Pick up your copy of the Seed of Life today and discover with Kameclara  the fate of all her people… and the true purpose of their mission.

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Additional Resources

How to Live in Infinite Possibility

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7 Ways to Live a More Meaningful Life

How to life a meaningful life

Whenever we are faced with our mortality, we look back and see if we have lived a, meaningful life. At the age of thirty-six, on the verge of completing a decade’s worth of training as a neurosurgeon, Paul Kalanithi was diagnosed with stage IV lung cancer and he reflected on the, meaning of life. One day he was a doctor treating the dying, and the next he was a patient struggling to understand the, meaning of life. And just like that, the future he and his wife had imagined evaporated. When Breath Becomes Air, chronicles Kalanithi’s transformation from a naïve medical student “possessed,” as he wrote, by the question of what, given that all organisms die, makes a virtuous and, meaningful life, into a neurosurgeon at Stanford working in the brain, the most critical place for human identity, and finally into a patient and new father confronting his own mortality and, life.

Washington Post: When Breath Becomes Air’: Young doctor’s last words of wisdom, hope

What is the, meaning of life? What makes life  worth living in the face of death? What do you do when the future, no longer a ladder toward your goals in life, flattens out into a perpetual present? What does it mean to have a child, to nurture a new life as another fades away? These are some of the questions Kalanithi wrestles with in this profoundly moving, exquisitely observed memoir.

Today on the Mindset Transformation radio show and podcast, I would like to take you on a journey into living!

How to live before you die

 7 Ways to live a virtuous and, meaningful life.

Psychologists says that in order to live a virtuous and, meaningful life, you should have balance in these 7 areas:

1. You should have A fulfilling career – i.e. You are doing what you love.
2. You should and must have a relationship with a higher power, God.
3. You must be fruitful and multiply.
4. You should offer Service to your community.
5. You must have effective time management and stress reduction.
6. You must get quality sleep, adequate exercise and proper nutrition.
7. You should spend quality time with loved one’s friends and family.

A Fulfilling career makes,  life,  meaningful 

Most people don’t do what they love, they work to live; so they live to work!
I saw a viral picture a few weeks back on Instagram that made me chuckle
It was a picture of a man crying with the caption:

Podbean

So how do you find your passion, work in your passion or work on your passion?

You have to Listen to your soul.

If you are dreading going to work, hate it all the time you are there, and you are not serving or making a difference in the lives of others, then quit. Working a job you hate does not allow for a, meaningful life.
Step out on faith.
Faith, now faith is the assurance of things hoped for and the conviction of things not seen.
Believe that God will fund your purpose, and if it is his will.

On the road to Damascus, Saul encountered Christ in a memorable experience that left him temporally blind. Immediately he started to undergo a major transformation of his whole life and character, including a total reorientation of his world view. Following this he was commissioned into service as an apostle to the Gentiles. Paul’s story highlights the 3 dynamics of a meaningful life.
The relational the, transformational, and the vocational. We must not choose one and neglect the others.

The relational experiences in a, meaningful life, results in openness to others, healing progress towards Christlikeness and participation in God’s purposes in the world.

The, Transformational, concerns how we transform after being touched by God and the Holy Spirit. Just as all Saul’s beliefs, mindset and values were altered, so can yours. This show’s mission is the offer you advice on how to do that.

The vocational is what we are talking about and it is how God works through us. I am doing God’s work.
He has given me the purpose of speaking life into you!

So, choose your vocation wisely and work as unto the Lord.

Know this for sure, that the quickest and most direct path to sickness and death is to linger in stressful situations. All diseases can be traced back to inflammation. Inflammation is brought on by stress and negative emotions.

Find your purpose and step out on faith.

As a coach, I can Help you design a plan to get there quicker.

A relationship with a higher power give you a, meaningful  life 

We are dual beings having both a physical and a nonphysical experience.

The most important barometer to living a meaningful and virtuous life is how your connect with source and if you understand why your soul chose this time to manifest into a physical being. i.e Understand what you are here to do!
When you meditate, you open communication with source energy and infinite intelligence.

This is the gateway, this is the path a, meaningful life.

When you are in communication with source, you get fed instructions to live a meaningful and virtuous life.
It is a 2 way communication; you ask and you receive.

So don’t stay in that job that is killing you, ask your source to direct you to the right job.
Listen for the instructions on how to do it the supernatural way, and not by your own limited powers.
I am telling you from personal experience, this works.
I receive instructions every morning either in bed before I rise, during meditation or sometimes later in the day. I act on my inspirations and they always produce fruit. And because I act on them,

I keep receiving more. If you don’t act on your gut instinct, your gut instincts will stop coming.
The bible teaches us not to do anything in your own strength! With God all things are possible.
Everything begins with our relationship with God and the improved quality of other relationships that develop out of this. In the intimacy of such a personal relationship, something of God’s own character gradually spills over into ours; it stimulates our, transformation. From our new awareness and knowing that God loves us, comes an increased confidence and boldness to face life’s challenges and opportunities. It motivates and empowers us to take more risks. It becomes the platform for a whole new approach to courageous and virtuous living.

God said “Be fruitful and multiply, and repopulate the earth”

Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord, the fruit of the womb a reward”
Can you truly have lived a, meaningful, and virtuous life if you have not multiplied yourself?
In the bible age, women who were barren were believed to be cursed.
In today’s age bearing a child is still considered one of the most rewarding and sought after experiences in life.
God hardwired unconditional love to the mother. A love that transforms hearts, an energy that is quantum, that means it can be felt over great distances just by thinking of your child.
I can tell you that the birth of my 2 children were the most, meaningful, things I did in my life. They are my reward, a gift that keeps on giving and giving.

The second question Dr Kalanitht asked as he faced his morality was:

“How do you nurture your child to live life, as yours fades away”

You see Dr Kalanitht and his wife decided to accept God’s plan for them to be fruitful and multiply.
They decided to leave a legacy behind, so they had a baby together.
The thought of leaving behind a child only increased the pain for Dr. Kalanitht.
We would all agree that leaving behind loved ones is the most painful part of death.

That is why we must live each day like it is your last.

You must impart all the love, knowledge and wisdom into your children when you are alive, so as they grow older, they would not depart from it and you will live on in their thoughts and hearts.

Be of Service to your community is another way to live a, meaningful life 

Your Success is in direct proportion to your service.
We must put the fuel in before we get heat.
No man can get rich by himself, unless he enriches the lives of others.
To lead you must first serve.
Your purpose in life will always include service to others.

Serving at the Ronald McDonald House

There’s a special connection that comes with preparing meals for others too heartbroken to cook for themselves. Making those dinners with a group of volunteers brings an intimacy and humility that cannot be matched. And one of the best spots I know to do that is at the Ronald McDonald House in Falls Church, Va., a place that offers comfort, refuge and care for families whose children are battling life-threatening illnesses.

Jarun Brown and Beverly Johnson prepare a meal at the Ronald McDonald House in Falls Church, Va.
Jarun Brown, 64, chops broccoli as we create a salad for 14 family members staying at the House. A social worker and former McDonald’s executive, she once “danced for a minute” with the Alvin Ailey Dance Company. Her previous corporate position earned her a seat on the Ronald McDonald House Charities (RMHC) board in Norfolk, Va., and she began volunteering with the Falls Church Ronald McDonald House six years ago.

“We do whatever is needed,” Brown says of the volunteers’ work. That could mean cooking a meal, cleaning the house, rotating refrigerated food or writing thank-you notes. Although volunteers and families don’t often stay in touch after leaving the House, Brown has kept in contact with a few families over the years. “It’s great to hear how our families are doing, and learn about the children’s recovery process,” she says. It makes their lives, meaningful.

Erin Petri, the evening manager, joins us. I give her an onion to chop and hope she doesn’t cry. A few minutes later another volunteer, Beverly Johnson, comes in. Volunteering with RMHC was on her bucket list after suffering the loss of a child years ago. A place like the Ronald McDonald House would have been helpful to her.
“I can relate [to what the families are experiencing] and that’s what makes it so special and so rewarding to me,” she says as she chops apples.
The families begin to enter the dining room. Several of them are drawn to the aroma of pineapple chicken simmering on the stovetop. We finish the broccoli salad and set it on the counter, next to the stove with the chicken and rice. It smells delicious and comforting, and we are happy that we have given these families what may be the only positive event for them that day.
Johnson offers to clean up, and I happily accept. “It is good therapy for me,” she says of her Ronald McDonald House work. “I think I’ve found my niche.”

Effective Time Management gives life, meaning. 

The key to a stress-free life is effective time management.
If you are always working in red zone of deadline you will experience burnout.
Effective time management is scheduling your day to work on top priority tasks before you work on C or D priority tasks.
When you do this, you will eliminate stress.
Effective time management also means that you plan your days to include the things that give life meaning. Walking in nature, exercise, reading, sitting quietly to reflect or meditate, spending quality time with loved ones, and proper rest.

Getting quality sleep, good nutrition, and exercise

Physical exercise releases endorphins, improves sleep, prevents diseases, releases stress, prevents dementia, prolongs life….
I could go on and on.
Everybody knows that exercise is good for your body, mind, and soul; yet few do it.

Since our topic today is When breathe becomes air: How to live a virtuous and, meaningful life.
I think everybody reading this would want to live a quality life. One that includes being healthy and independent.
The most effective way to ensure this is to get regular exercise, adequate nutrition and proper rest
In his book “The Eat to Live Plan” John Fuhrman MD says, our body’s are designed for wellness. Give it the right biochemical environment for healing and it becomes a miraculous self-healing machine. When you eat mostly high-nutrient foods, the body ages slower and is armed to prevent and reverse many common illnesses, like diabetes.

The exercise prescription and a, meaningful life

Exercise is extremely important. Almost everyone can do something, even those who cannot walk can do arm, abdominal, and back exercises with light weights or use an arm cycle. Exercise will facilitate your weight loss and make you healthier. Vigorous exercise has a powerful effect on promoting longevity.

Spending quality time with loved ones gives, life, meaning 

In human affairs, there are efforts, and there are results.
The strength of the effort is the measure of the result. We know this to be a fact.
If you studied for your test, you will get a better grade.
If you make more sales calls, you will get more sales; if you spend quality time with your spouse, you will have a better marriage, if you spend quality time with your kids, they wouldn’t act out looking for attention.

Transform your Mind Stitcher
Transform your Mind Stitcher

Invest in your relationships.
Joel Osteen says that if you want your relationships to thrive, you must invest in them.
Be a giver rather than a taker. Strive to make deposits into the lives of your loved ones and other peoples lives. Encourage them, build them up, and help them to feel better about themselves.
One of the best advice I received on my wedding day, was to look at my marriage as a bank account. Don’t make withdrawals if I made no deposits”

Joel Osteen says the same thing.
Look at your relationships as an “emotional bank account” Every time you interact with loved ones or friends, you are either making a deposit or a withdrawal from your account.
You make deposits in the lives of your loved ones by giving them a hug and a kiss, telling them how much you love them, spending quality time with them, listening to them when they speak or being involved in the things they love like playing the piano, sports, painting etc.
We make withdrawals when we don’t take time for people, we don’t keep our commitments, when we don’t express appreciation. When we make more withdrawals than deposits our account becomes overdrawn.

The bible says in Ecclesiastes 5:3

The dream comes through much effort and the voice of a fool through many words.

Having a, meaningful, and virtuous life comes through much effort. You can’t just have the knowledge and don’t put it into action, you can’t just talk about wanting to live a, meaningful life, and not put the effort in.

Having a fulfilling career takes effort. You must learn the skills and then work hard to move up through the corporate ladder or building your own business.

Having a relationship with God takes the effort to find time to meditate and listen for instructions.

Being a good parent takes a lot of effort. Someone else is depending on you.

Being of service to your community takes supreme effort. Who has the time you ask? But something happens when you help the less fortunate. When you work at the soup kitchen and feed the hungry; you find your humanity. All your pedilly problems seems insignificant.

It takes effort to manage your time effectively, and not become reactionary.

It takes effort to make sure you are eating a balanced diet and taking supplements. It takes effort to get up early to exercise or do it after a long day. But if you want to live a long and meaningful life, you will do it.

If you found this content inspirational, be sure to share with your friends.
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Additional Resources

No Fear : How to Live with Courage