How to use Food for Beauty and Your Natural Facelift

How to get a natural facelift with food

Food, plays a major role in, beauty,  not only because it helps us reduce, stress, but it feeds us vitamins and minerals that can stimulate our, collagen. My whole approach to, skin care, is how do we purge the mind, the body and the skin from, stress and have a natural, facelift?

Gregory Landsman is one of the most noted global, beauty, and wellness experts in the world. He is the best-selling author of nine books, and a TV host who specializes in using food as a natural, facelift. Often referred to as ‘The Beauty Advisor’, Gregory’s books and global TV program “Face Lifting Food” show viewers how to create quick skin-boosting meals and powerful skin treatments using everyday foods to achieve younger, healthier looking skin at any age. Having worked in the, beauty, industry for 30+ years Gregory believes that looking youthful goes well beyond waging war on wrinkles: and that how we age is 100% controllable. His natural, face lifting, methods are used globally by models, shown in universities, and recommended by doctors. Gregory is a strong voice for inclusion. From Apartheid South Africa to working at the height of the fashion industry, and his fundamental discovery that regardless of what we do, how we look cannot be separated from how we feel.

Listen to the full interview here: 

 

Introduction to Becoming a Beauty Expert

Myrna – Tell us your journey to becoming a, beauty, and wellness expert as well as authoring nine books.

Gregory – I think our life journey takes us where we need to go regardless of where we start. My journey to understanding the concept of, beauty, started from a young age. I was born in South Africa at the height of the apartheid system. Many people say that the country you are born in shapes the quality of the human being and your character.

In my case I have strong views on skin, because from an early age I knew that the color of my skin, the texture of my hair and the width of my nose would determine my level of freedom. My quality of life and before I even got to school, I could read park bench signs – whites only or the public toilets or having to listen to my mum saying could you please hold going to the bathroom until we got home because you can’t use that toilet.

We’ve got to stop with the judgments, we’ve got to stop with the labels. I was a child that was beaten and spat on daily by the time I got to school for my differences. I had lost all belief in who I was as a child, but I was able to put myself back together. We shifted to Australia and my mum became a model and I followed in her footsteps and that’s how I entered into the, beauty, Industry.

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Beauty comes from the inside

Myrna – Your story is really interesting. When you were growing up you probably had a negative opinion of yourself and then you became a model and a, beauty expert. Did that shift the way you viewed yourself?

Gregory – I still walked around with insecurities and fears  and I still felt like that broken kid. That’s why I firmly believe that what is on the inside shows up on the outside. My grandma said something that goes to the heart of, beauty.

She said you know boy, God gives us all five minutes of grace and we can wow people with our fancy smiles and our cute little nose; but after your five minutes, the truth of who you are emerges and nothing can hide that.

 

The definition of Beauty

I utilize the acronym of, beauty:

B – is for balance. It is the balance of inner virtues that radiates outwardly. It’s what ultimately shapes our, beauty, and our lives.

E – the ease for enthusiasm, to show enthusiasm for who we are and all aspects of who we are.

A – is for acceptance, accepting ourselves as a whole without isolating or fragmenting, beauty, to certain physical characteristics.

U – is for understanding that when we are born, we are born whole and beautiful and along the way we have been educated to doubt what we were given. If we have the ability to create insecurity, we have the ability to eliminate it.

T – is for trust, learning to trust in who we are and what we represent in this world, and the wisdom that you possess.

Y- You possess, beauty, if you can see it in a much more expansive way, other than just physical, beauty. It is not about masculinity, it’s not about femininity, it’s about humanity and celebrating the divine differences we all bring to this world.

That is the foundation that my work is based on, because I believe that is where it starts. It starts on the inside and then we can take care of the skin that houses the spirit, we take care of our, beauty.

It is not a line that ages a woman, it is her energy. Her energy gives her a natural, facelift.

Beauty and Aging

When a woman begins to lose her self-belief and her strong sense of what she represents in this world, she begins to age. I know women who are 85 years old, I call them ageless, because it’s not about their age, it’s about their energy and they’re beautiful.

How to Get a Natural Facelift
The Beauty of a Natural Facelift

Gregory – Myrna you’re ageless, you’ve got vitality and beauty, it’s your beautiful energy. It is infectious and give you a natural, facelift.

Myrna – Thank you, I do have a lot of good energy and I feel good about myself and I laugh a lot. I am thinking this is because I have good genes and because I followed a, skin care, regiment since the age of 18 years old. When I was 18 years old, I became a model and learnt, skin care. I have kept that, skin care routine, of cleanse, tone and moisturize for over 3 decades. I have also done facials over the years to give my face a, facelift.

Gregory – When we’re speaking about cleanse, tone and moisturize, that is all the stuff of forgive, learn, laugh that’s how we’re constantly cleansing internally and that is a natural, facelift. We are letting stuff go and the more we let go, the younger we look.

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Aging of the Skin is a natural process

I never look at, skin, in isolation or a wrinkle, it’s much more on a holistic level. Aging is a natural process of life, and it is something that I welcome; but, premature skin aging, we can seriously do something about that.

The skin, it never lies.

  • It will tell you the food you’re eating or not eating,
  • You skin will tell you your breathing patterns,
  • Highlights the lack of water, or lack of sleep.
  • All of these things play a major role in our skin and, beauty.

Food, plays a major role in, healthy skin,  not only because it helps us reduce, stress, but it feeds us vitamins and minerals that can stimulate our, collagen and give us a, facelift. My whole my whole approach to, skin care, is how do we purge the mind, the body and the skin from, stress?

We do that with, food, we purge with good breathing, we do it with, face exercises, and a little, face massage. We have to purge the body from, stress, because, stress, is what ages the skin. When we are stressed, we make less, collagen, and as we age it also decreases. Constant, stress, accelerates this whole process.

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Transform Your Mind Podcast Player FM

Aging Skin and Stress

If the, stress hormone, cortisol, is raging, you are aging prematurely. We want to get, cortisol, under control and we can do it with, food, and breath. Cortisol, is responsible when if you can’t sleep, that means you have too much of it in your body.

Stress, and, cortisol, impacts the production of our, collagen, and it creates chaos with our skin. It also creates chaos in our lives, when we don’t feel good, we don’t look good either.

Myrna – You mentioned that, sleep, is really important when it comes to your, skin care routine, people often refer to it as, beauty sleep.

What people don’t know is that when we, sleep, we activate the, human growth hormone, which strengthens the skin. It creates a thicker skin. It’s also in the state of, rest and digest, where we repair our skin and more, collagen, is produced.

The greatest, anti-aging, secrets can be found in our everyday, foods. With the right, foods, wrinkles begin to fade and skin regains elasticity, that’s the power of, food to give us a natural, facelift.

Can we get collagen from beauty creams?

When you buy facial products or creams with, collagen, it is a waste of money. Collagen, is the protein in connective tissue that keeps the, skin, elastic. That molecule can’t push through the, skin, when applied with creams. The best way to stimulate, collagen, is through, food, and, sleep.

The fibers in our, collagen, become weak through the free radicals. The best way to strengthen is to eat, foods, and topically apply skin regenerating vitamins and minerals that naturally stimulate and protect our, collagen.

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Transform Your Mind Podcast Pandora

Collagen stimulating foods:

• Vitamin C – Vitamin C is key to, collagen, production and since it can’t be stored in the body, it’s really important to top it up all the time. So we have to eat, face-lifting foods, like –

  • sweet red peppers,
  • brussels sprouts,
  • broccoli and
  • tomato.

If you love tomato, while it’s fantastic uncooked, when you cook it with a little bit of olive oil, you access lycopene, a powerful antioxidant.

A  fresh tomato is something you can put in a little strainer and you take the juice of it and apply that on your skin. It’s a wonderful tonic for the skin and a natural, facelift.

• Vitamin E – that’s a powerful antioxidant that protects and reduces damage caused to, skin cells; but it’s also anti-inflammatory and that keeps the, skin, smooth, and it reduces wrinkles.
• You can find antioxidant with spinach, almonds, sunflower oil and mangoes. It’s not one specific, face lifting food, it is a variety.

• Vitamin B – is incredible for, skin, and you can get a complex variety from beets, eggs, turkey, whole wheat breads. If you are a lover of spinach and kale, pour a little bit of olive oil over the greens. It helps the body absorb the nutrients effectively.

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Face lifting Foods

If you eat garlic and onion, they contain sulfur, a wonderful, beauty, mineral, but with garlic, one thing you’ve got to remember is while it’s got incredible health benefits you must crush it and then leave it for at least five minutes. It activates and releases the enzyme allicin, an organic compound and a really powerful antioxidant and, facelift.

Glutathione, is often referred to as the mother of all antioxidants, you find it in the tip of asparagus, and avocados. It’s a wonderful way to support your, glutathione, levels.

If you’ve heard of, hyaluronic acid, people have it injected in their faces. These are injectables, but if you look, hyaluronic acid, is present when a baby’s born. Babies they always say as smooth as a baby’s bottom. Babies are pumped full of, hyaluronic acid, but as we age we lose it, but something as simple as consuming Vitamin B in our diet activates and helps increase our, hyaluronic acid, levels for a natural, facelift.

Include omega-3 fatty acids in your diet, it is a wonderful moisturizer, you access omega-3 fatty acids through fish, and it moisturizes the skin from the inside out giving you a, facelift.

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iHeart Radio

Supplements help to get nutrients into your Skin

You use, supplements, if you’re not getting these nutrients in natural, food.

Water we all have access to it and our body it’s 70 to 80% of our brain tissue is water, so if you’re dehydrated your body and your mind are stressed. If you’re feeling thirsty, you’re already a little bit dehydrated.

I can change someone’s, skin, the quality and texture of with water and showing them how to breathe correctly.

Myrna – We can’t have this conversation without talking about what Hollywood and most people are doing with the cosmetic, plastic surgery. Plumping up the, skin, with Botox.

Using Natural Food as a facelift instead of Plastic Surgery

I think our world as it stands today, there’s some things going wrong especially in the, beauty, world. The, beauty, industry, anti-aging, it’s a multi-billion dollar industry that often drives fear and, stress, around the aging process.

There’s a fine line between self-improvement and self-destruction and with many of the procedures that I see, I believe that we’ve crossed the line to self-destruction. I can’t see the, beauty, in a face that doesn’t move or paralyzing a muscle.

You wrote the books “Face Value” “Face Fitness” and “Face Food” tells us about your books.

Face Value, is a incredible book that shows you really how to utilize all the ingredients in your kitchen to take years off your face naturally and for a natural, facelift. It will show you things like how to use the avocado, what grape seed oil can to support stronger skin. This
is based on rock solid science, everything that I do is based on science.

That’s why I work in the wellness centers with people undergoing chemotherapy. I show them how to change their, skin, because chemotherapy does horrible stuff to, skin.

Book: Face food
Book: Face food

I wrote “Face Food” and Face Food shows you how to stimulate the, collagen, from the inside with foods that you’re eating and where to find all of these, anti-aging, ingredients.

Face massages and Face Fitness

We haven’t touched on, face fitness, is how do you keep the muscles on the face strong because it’s not a line that ages a face, but a sagging muscle. We’ve got over 50 of these muscles on the face, we only use not even half of them, so when we know these are the muscles need to be strengthened.

We give ourselves a, natural facelift. When I get a, facial they always end it with a, face massage.
I also do a, face massage, every night when I apply my night cream.

Additional Resources

https://www.buzzsprout.com/1761155

 

Change Your Skincare Routine: Change Your Life

How to Find Beauty in Your Now!

Learn How to Get Back to Basics With These 7 Core Values

Personal Core values

In order to transform your life, you must first transform your, mindset, by getting, back to basics. The principle here is that there’s a, mindset connection, that we need to make for these seven elements to become our, core values.

The reason that people are not activating the, basics,  in their life is because there isn’t a personal, connection. The, mindset, happens before any strategy or tactic can form our, core values.

My guest today is  T.J Loeffler is a transformational coach and author.

Listen to the full interview here: 

 

T.J realized the right path is actually a change in, mindset, so he wrote the book “Back To Basics: How To Get More Out Of Your Life by Doing Less Than You Think” T.J’s seminar called “Welcome to Yourself” was inspiration from God about establishing our, core values.

 

Our identity “who am I” as the first step in “Welcome to Yourself. Our identity does shape our decisions which then shapes our legacy,  our day-to-day priorities and our, core values.

 

Your past equals your present, if you keep stumbling and hitting your foot on the same thing, until you clarify it and see it, you’re going to continue doing that.

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Transform your Mind Podcast Index

How do we go from “Welcome To Yourself” to “back to basics”?

T.J – Success is really about progress not perfection. Getting, back to basics, started because I was burned out. I was exhausted, and I needed to heal. I realized that until I went through the process of actually healing, changing and growing myself, there would be no way I’d be able help somebody else. I needed to reflect on my, core values.

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Transform Your Mind PTWWN TV

That’s how, back to basics, came about, it’s like put on your mask first.  You’ve got to heal yourself. You’ve got to be able to become whole again by focusing on your, core values.

The seven Core Value System

I teach about the seven, core values, elements or the, core pillar, system.

These are the key elements in the, back-to-basics,  model.

 

  • Diet
  • Sleep
  • Movement
  • Active rest
  • Reflection
  • Connection
  • Fun

How do we define FUN

Fun, is an interesting one, somebody who’s reading this might say okay that sounds kind of cheesy; but let me tell you exactly what I mean. People who grew up in homes where there was extreme anxiety or anxiousness, guess what goes first, fun.

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Transform Your Mind Podcast Player FM

So, people who don’t know how to return to joy in their life, might have grown up in an environment that was not necessarily healthy, and they learned how to cope with that by doing things that are no longer working for them, like over working.  So when you use that, fun, tool of, back to basics, it puts the, fun, back into your life.

Connection and Back to Basics

The principle here is that there’s a, mindset connection, that we need to make to these seven elements our, core values.

The reason that people are not activating the, basics,  and, core values, in their life is because there isn’t a personal, connection. The, mindset, happens before any strategy or tactic.

So, when you’re asking how do people get, back to basics?  The first thing you need to do is to recognize the need to prioritize your, core values.

I would prioritize my day, when I didn’t know what I was doing.  I was trying to figure out how do you grow a business; how to get more clients? I prioritized learning how to eat right, and eat on time and have enough energy in my own life.

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A Healthy Diet is a Core Value

Diet – If you don’t eat right, you have no energy.

When it comes to vitamins and minerals, you’re probably looking for the bottom line: How much do you need, and what foods have them? The list below will help you out. It covers all the vitamins and minerals you should get, preferably from food. Calcium Foods that have it: Milk, fortified nondairy alternatives like soy milk, yogurt, hard cheeses, fortified cereals, unfortified almond milk, kaleHow much you need:

  • Adults ages 19-50: 1,000 milligrams per day
  • Women age 51 and older: 1,200 milligrams per day
  • Men age 51 – 70: 1,000 milligrams per day
  • Men 71 and older: 1,200 milligrams per day

What it does: Needed for bone growth and strength, blood clotting, muscle contraction, and more

Don’t get more than this a day: 2,500 milligrams per day for adults age 50 and younger, 2,000 mg per day for those 51 and older

Choline

Foods that have it: Milk, liver, eggs, peanuts

How much you need:

  • Men: 550 milligrams per day
  • Women: 425 milligrams per day
  • Pregnant women: 450 milligrams per day
  • Breastfeeding women: 550 milligrams per day
What it does: Helps make cells Don’t get more than this much: 3,500 milligrams per day

Sleep is important to reduce Stress and is a core value

Sleep – If you don’t, sleep, then you can’t function. Movement and exercise that’s obviously very important to, fun.

 

Highly successful people can have all the money in the bank and  still can’t have, fun.

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Transform Your Mind Podcast Addict

What’s the difference between active rest and sleep?

When you’re actually sleeping, there’s a fluid that washes over our brain and actually, helps us detoxify or take out some of the toxic thoughts that are built up as proteins in our brain.  So, if we’re chronically under-slept, we’re allowing this protein not to do its job.

I don’t know if this is a scientific parallel equivalent, but you could think about this protein as kind of plaque buildup in your brain. If we are not sleeping well enough, if we’re not sleeping long enough, we’re not getting the cleansing that needs to happen in our brain, so we end up with what negative thinking.

If we continue over to, active rest, a lot of people that we’re working with are hyperactive. Hyperactive is the opposite of hypoactive, so when you think about hypoactive that’s more like reclusive or lazy.

People who are wired to be hyperactive or have taught themselves that this is how I get through hard situations that’s not a bad thing, however your body is not meant to be in a state of fight flight or freeze.  So unless we can move from sympathetic tone towards parasympathetic tone or from fight flight to rest and digest state, our body is not going to be able to process things the right way.

Transform Your Mind Podcast Pandora
Transform Your Mind Podcast Pandora

Fight Flight or Freeze prevents digestion

For example, your nutrients from your food. You can eat all the kale and salmon you want, but if your body is in, fight flight, or freeze state you’re not going to be digesting that food properly.

So, active rest, helps you down regulate, it helps you go from that state of, fight flight or freeze, where you might be anxious or you might be shallow mouth breathing to a state where you’re more rested while awake.

Body meditation is now a trend, because people are over stimulated and they need a way to effectively down regulate. Here’s the key it’s like you’re hijacking your body your mind and your body have a, connection, that you need to make and many people have lost that, connection.

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Active Rest is not Meditation

Active rest, helps you kind of re-establish that as does movement and other things.

The, mind-body connection, is what yoga does.

We’re coming through a, pandemic, it’s going on now for over a year.  Many people might be feeling the consequences of that. You can feel isolated and alone in a city of 8 million people.

The key for, connection, is not quantity it is quality. The problem is people try and find, connection, through others before finding, connection,  with God.  It’s not that you can’t have, connection, with God through others, but it’s that there’s an intimate personal encounter that God wants to have with us.

Connection to God should be a core value

We host the presence of God, you’re connected to him wherever you go, but there’s really a development and cultivation that needs to happen to learn how to host the presence of God.

 

A lot of people do not understand the authority they have over the atmosphere in their home for example. They do not understand the awareness, or they don’t have the awareness to understand the environments that they’re entering into every single day.

 

I think research has shown that we do need people, it’s nice to have a relationship with God, but we actually do need people.

 

What is your research on loneliness?

 

Even though you might be spiritually connected to God, you still need people.

 

Tell our listeners how they can connect with you. You said that your book is delayed, but tell us about your first book and your website, coaching and your podcast.

Conclusion

If anybody listening or reading, first I hope first and foremost you receive what was shared today from Myrna and me as seeds. That’s my encouragement to you that when you receive seeds, you can let those seeds grow to trees and over time you know that is really something that you look at in your life. Let those seeds become your, core values.

 

If you want more seeds, you can go to my site is tjloeffler.com and there you’ll find not only the podcast, but you’ll also find access to everything else that Myrna mentioned, and the podcast is just a great way to start. The podcast is a great way to continue working on your mindset. My podcast is called Mindset with T.J Loefler.

 

You can listen to the podcast or you can purchase the book from my website corepillars.com. It’s called “Back to basics how to get more out of life by doing less than you think” teaching you the, core pillar, system.

 

I also want to invite you guys to join my Facebook group Lifecoach. If you have not done so already please subscribe to the podcast on iTunes and leave a review.

 

My team and I were referencing this scripture and I would like to leave this with you. I believe this will be encouraging to somebody who’s reading this blog.

 

1 Timothy 6:6, NIV: “But godliness with contentment is great gain.” … 1 Timothy 6:6, NLT: “Yet true godliness with contentment is itself great wealth.”

 

When we find contentment with what we have and no need for more, we know that we can truly rest in God’s presence, however I would also say if you’re reading this and you do have a desire for more, that’s a healthy desire.

 

So, godliness with contentment is great, but you don’t have to be satisfied, there’s more out there so keep going.

Additional Resources

Ask Coach Myrna: How to Start Over?

How to Create Positive Core Beliefs

 

The Life and Death of Nipsey Hussle: Hip Hop Brightest Artist

Nipsey Hussle Hip Hop Artist

Rob Kenner, New York Times best-selling author of the Marathon Don’t Stop: The Life and Times of Nipsey Hussle shares the  principles that, Nipsey Hussle,  advocated in his music and in his daily life and work. Nipsey’s music on self-empowerment, economic independence, owning your own intellectual property, owning real estate investments, financial literacy and also just supporting people who support you.

Rob – The reason that I wrote the book and called it The Marathon Don’t Stop is because I believe that, Nipsy Hussle, is one of the most important and misunderstood artists in the history of, hip-hop.

Download and listen to the full interview here:

Introduction to Nipsey Hussle

Rob is going to share the life of the Man, Nipsey Hussle, not just the artist.  Nipsey Hussle, was more than a rapper, this young man was instrumental in a lot of things: building up his community and giving back among other things. Rob is going to expand on our knowledge of both the, hip-hop, artist and, Nipsey Hussle,  life and legacy.

 

I must confess that I did not know of, Nipsey Hussle, until he was murdered and the whole world was talking about him.  My generation is not necessarily a rap or a, hip-hop, kind of generation, my generation is the R&B soul generation.  Rob on the other hand is intimately connected with, hip-hop, and its culture.

Book: The Marathon Don't Stop
Book: The Marathon Don’t Stop

Bio of Rob Kenner New York Times Best Selling Author

Rob Kenner is one of the most prolific and influential voices in, hip hop, publishing. A founding editor of Vibe, Kenner joined the start-up team of Quincy Jones’ groundbreaking, hip hop, monthly in 1992. During a nineteen-year run at Vibe, he edited and wrote cover and feature stories on iconic cultural figures ranging from Tupac Shakur to Barack Obama as well as writing the acclaimed column Boomshots.

Kenner’s writing has appeared in Complex, Genius, Mass Appeal, Pigeons & Planes, Ego Trip, Poetry magazine, The New York Times, and Billboard. He’s also produced and directed documentary shorts on the likes of De La Soul, Nas, and Post Malone. As an editor at Vibe Books, Kenner worked on the New York Times bestseller Tupac Shakur and contributed to The Vibe History of Hip Hop. He went on to co-author VX: 10 Years of Vibe Photography and produced the book Unbelievable, a biography of The Notorious B.I.G. by Cheo Hodari Coker which was optioned for the motion picture Notorious. His latest book is a New York Times Best seller “The Marathon Don’t Stop: The Life and Times of Nipsey Hussle. 

 

Myrna – I was reading your press releases, I understand that you met, Nipsey Hussle, about 10 years ago at, Vibe.  What impressed you most about the man back then?

Nipsey Hustle Hip Hop Music

Rob – Nipsey Hussle, had just released one of his first major mixtapes a project called Bullets Ain’t Got No Name and he was very excited to come up to the office of, vibe magazine, and presented it to the staff. I learned later in the process of researching my book The Marathon Don’t Stop, he had been submitting his demo and photo to the magazine for some time hoping to be featured in our “next section”, which is a platform for new artists.  People like Jay-z and Biggie and Mary J Blige got their first break at, Vibe, by being featured in the “next section” at, Vibe.

Nipsey’s goal was be featured in that section but, honestly where he was in his career at that moment he was not really on our radar yet.  He was an unsigned artist so, and he was first sending those demos in, but like every goal he ever set for himself in life.  He set a very high goal and although he did not achieve his goal right away he persisted. Nipsey Hussle, just kept at it and did not give up and by God he made it into the office of, Vibe, by 2009 and presented his mixtape to the Staff.

I was impressed by his charisma, his energy, his personal magnetism.  I remember the man who walked into the conference room that day. His braids immaculately done and his outfit on point, his gold chain was shining, and he was very proud to be presenting his music.  When he pressed play, it was powerful stuff.

We had worked on the first cover story for Snoop Dogg back in 1993 and so I personally had a strong sense of déjà vu.  Nipsey Hussle, was coming from Los Angeles and giving that really hard West Coast sound.  One of the tracks on the tape he was rapping over a famous Dr Dre beat the song Gin and Juice. You have to come correct if you are going to record to that beat. It was very impressive to me.

 

Vibe Magazine featured New Hip Hop Artists in their Next Section

After he played all of his music, I took him aside and I said, “keep doing what you’re doing” In fact he did get his one-page write-up at, Vibe, shortly before the magazine folded or seized print publication. Vibe, did transition to a digital publisher online magazine. Over time everything he did was special, he was just doing things differently.

He was changing the game in terms of his business strategy and as I would learn later his commitment to his community and to all the people that were helping him build his movement.

So, that was that was the first impression and it stuck with me.

 

Myrna – I was very impressed motivate and hustle official video.  Loved the music, it had close to 63 million views. Hip hop has a large audience.

Can you tell us why you wrote the book “The Marathon Don’t Stop?” I know that a couple of Nipsey’s mix tapes were called, Marathon. What does that really mean and why did you choose it as a title of your book?

The Marathon Continues

Rob – Marathon, and, The Marathon Continues, is a kind of motto for his fans especially after his tragic passing.  Kind of a rallying cry to make sure that all of the things that, Nipsey Hussle, stands for to continue.  All of the principles that he advocated in his music and in his interviews and in his daily life and his work which have to do with self-empowerment, economic independence, owning your own intellectual property, owning real estate investments, financial literacy and also just supporting people who support you.

The reason that I wrote the book and called it The Marathon Don’t Stop is because I believe that, Nipsy Hussle, is one of the most important and misunderstood artists in the history of, hip-hop.

As you mentioned he was a businessman, entrepreneur, leader, and an activist.  He really identified strongly with civil rights leaders.

In the latest song which was released after his passing is a track called What It Feels Like featuring Jay-z and, Nipsy Hussle, on the same track. This track was used for soundtrack to the film Judas and the Black Messiah. Nipsy often referred to himself as young, Malcolm X.

He wore a, Malcolm X, pendant which his brother had made custom for himself and then let Nipsey keep when he was going away to prison for some time.

Transform your Mind Podcast Index
Transform your Mind Podcast Index

Nipsey Hussle was more than a Hip Hop Artist

I think he saw himself as much more than an entertainer, he was someone committed to the upliftment and full respect of his community. I think that is one of the reasons why this book was so important. You are not the only person who’s told me that you were unaware of what Nipsey was doing until you tuned into his Staples Center memorial service where 20,000 thousand people were all on their feet mourning him and celebrating his life.

President Obama wrote him a letter of tribute for that ceremony. Stevie Wonder sang at the funeral, Snoop Dogg eulogized him and of course his beloved Lauren London delivered a very moving tribute.

He had a family-owned business which was called All Money and No Money.

He and his brother also had a successful clothing store called the, Marathon, clothing which they built right in the same shopping plaza where he used to sell his mixtapes hand-to-hand right there on Slauson and Crenshaw.

He always talks about that intersection in his music.

Myrna – Yes, I noticed he’s got a title called Crenshaw.

Nipsey Hussle The Marathon Continues

Rob – That was a groundbreaking mixtape The Crankshaft Project, I would say for the rap industry that was the moment that if you were not paying attention to, Nipsey Hussle, everybody woke up at that moment because he had the ambitious idea of selling his mixtape for a hundred dollars.

The Crenshaw tape by that point he had put out a few free mixtapes and built up quite a loyal fan base, the Crenshaw actually came after the, Marathon, tape and, marathon continues, so those tapes expressed his vision of the, marathon, which was a long-term view.  Viewing life as a, Marathon, you don’t give up just because you’re behind in the first lap.  The, marathon, is not a team sport, other people can be cheering for you,  you can practice together; but nobody else can run your race.

Nipsey, understood that and he used that concept of the, marathon, to um encourage himself when he was down,  when there were setbacks in his path.  There were quite a few which you can get into in the book in detail; but he withstood tremendous pressure from a neighborhood that was extremely volatile.  There was a very hostile relationship between the police and the members of the community.  There was a strong gang culture which, Nipsey Hussle, eventually became involved in. His life was filled with challenges, he was someone that had unlimited potential, but huge obstacles, seemingly unsurmountable obstacles.

Transform Your Mind Podcast Player FM
Transform Your Mind Podcast Player FM

Nipsey Hussle an  Activist for change

People were paying attention to his work and what he stood for and the principles that he lived by. That is why the book is called The Marathon Don’t Stop, because Nipsy Hussle’s movement has not stopped.  He has been a steady presence in all the conversations about race in America. His face has been on murals all around the world, his music was streamed millions of times on election day 2020.

He had a very important song called FBT, I’m not sure if you listen to that one; but the initials are a rebuke of president Donald Trump.

Hip-hop, I believe helped to mobilize the vote which brought President Obama into office, but after eight years of Obama, Donald Trump was presenting kind of a backlash and playing on racial divisions. I think,  Nipsey Hussle, deserves credit for recognizing the power of, hip-hop, to speak to the moment in terms of social and political issues.

Transform Your Mind Podcast Pandora
Transform Your Mind Podcast Pandora

https://www.buzzsprout.com/1761155/podcast/embed

Nipsey Hussle and Tupak Shakur

Myrna – You also make a comparison between, Nipsey Hussle, and, Tupac Shakur, what are the similarities between these two, hip hop, artists?

Rob – I wasn’t the first one to compare Nipsey to Tupac, he actually called himself the Tupac of his generation. The album Victory Lap which was his major label debut,  has a line that states this. I did an in-depth interview with him I asked him about that line in the song, because that’s a big statement.

I said you’re calling yourself the Tupac of your generation, what do you mean by that?

He replied that to him, Tupac was a trojan horse for the streets. He had so much more going on inside of him than his thug life image would suggest. He was actually a very intelligent and sensitive person with a lot of different talents and qualities, that he didn’t necessarily

present at all times.

Transform Your Mind Podcast Addict
Transform Your Mind Podcast Addict

The Marathon Don’t Stop: The Life and Times of Nipsey Hussle

The focus of the book is about a triumph rather than a tragedy.  I want to focus on the message and the movement and the, marathon, rather than this atrocity that took place.

Myrna – I want to talk about, hip-hop, because I had to do some research for this interview to understand what it really is.  I know that you’re intimately connected with, hip hop, and rapping is a little different from, hip-hop, but why has, hip-hop, become this lifestyle and culture of the young generation?  It’s not even a race thing, because it covers all races.

Rob – We’re actually coming up on the 50th anniversary of what is considered the birth of, hip-hop. Hip Hop, started in the Bronx.  It was never about negative forces, but a way to escape the struggles of life in the Bronx. The Bronx was an urban wasteland and, hip-hop, grew and evolved into a multi-billion dollar industry.

It affects every aspect of pop culture from fashion to language to politics. Everything now is influenced by, hip-hop.  Quincy Jones who founded, Vibe magazine, understood the bebop generation as the coolest thing that ever-hit music. He saw, hip-hop, artists in their earliest stages of the development of that culture and he recognized a kindred spirit there.

The Origin of Hip Hop

Hip Hop, has become multi-racial and multicultural, in the early days in the Bronx it’s important to remember there were all kinds of kids involved. Puerto Rican, Dominican kids dancing, break dancing, painting graffiti.  Hip hop, is a lifestyle it’s not just rap music, which is one aspect of it the DJ and the MC.

There are multiple aspects to, hip hop, it’s become the most powerful and popular form of entertainment in the world.

 

Conclusion

Myrna – Tell our listeners how they can get pick up a copy of your book The Marathon Don’t Stop: The Life and Times of Nipsey Hussle. Also tell us about Vibe, I know it started off as a magazine, what do you guys do now?

Rob – Well, Vibe, was founded by Quincy Jones back in 1992.  I joined the startup staff in 93, Quincy had a good idea that we should do this and so I ended up working at, Vibe, for 17 years.  I was the only editor who started from the startup staff and stayed all the way until the very last day when you know the magazine had to be shut down.

Quincy had moved on and the ownership had changed hands, it’s a long story, but the bank basically repossessed the investment.  The website www.vibe.com is the digital version of, Vibe.  It’s a very important publication and became the definitive publication for, hip-hop, culture in terms of excellent photography and excellent journalism.

We had some of the most talented writers and photographers of this generation working at the Magazine.  Vive.com  has gone on because it needs to go on.  It still holds up a standard of excellence in terms of discussing all the aspects of, hip-hop, culture and lifestyle.

Transform Your Mind Pocket Casts
Transform Your Mind Pocket Casts

Additional Resources

How to Rewrite Your Life Story and Achieve Organizational Wellness

 

 

 

How Leaders Use Curiosity As Their Human Edge in a Digital Economy

Greg Orme The Human Edge

Greg Orme, Forbes contributor and Author of the Business book of the Year 2020 The Human Edge: How curiosity and creativity are your superpowers in the digital economy” shares, leadership, tips on thriving in a world of accelerating change through, creative thinking, curiosity, and consciousness. Greg shares with, leaders, how to remove the threat of, ai,  machines taking their jobs by excelling at the 4C’s, consciousness, curiosity, creativity, and collaboration.

I’m delighted to be here Myrna, I think we first came across each other through my one of my Forbes articles.

Myrna – Yes, I was browsing through Linkedin and I came across your article on, gratitude,  and when I clicked on it, I noticed that you had a book that was awarded Business book of the year. So, I decided to invite you on the show.

Listen the the Full Interview Here:

Greg –  Well isn’t serendipity great?  Those algorithms brought us together.  I’m coming from you Stratford in the UK and you’re on the west coast in Florida, what an amazing world we live in.  I’m very grateful for that.

How Can Leaders develop the Human Edge

Myrna – I am sure it was an honor to have the award of business book of the year.  I know your book was specifically designed for, leaders, but we’re all individual, leaders.  We have to lead ourselves first before we can lead others.

Why did you write The, Human Edge?  Can you give us a little background on your research for this topic and why we need a, human edge, in this digital and computer age?

Greg – That’s a great question, four years or so, I became really interested in one of the big issues of our lifetime.  Which is our human relationship with this machine age of, ai.

We all have smartphones that we carry around with us. We never leave them anywhere; this thing called, artificial intelligence, is here to stay.

What skills Leaders need to stay Relevant

After a speech one day on, leadership, one of the female CEO’s came up to me and said Greg , I’m kind of interested in the, organizational change, stuff;  but what skills do I need to remain relevant in the next 10 years?

That question led me to start the journey which led to the book, The Human Edge.  Even though I’m in the, leadership, business the, Human Edge, is for anyone.  It’s a little manual for your own humanity that even if your boss is a bit toxic you can keep under your desk and it’s hopefully the keys to some of your own potential.

Myrna – I  remember when the digital age started about the mid 80s, I was working at a bank and everybody was really worried about the ATM machines replacing tellers in the bank; but banks still need tellers 40 years later.

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Should we be worried about AI machines taking over our jobs?

Greg – Of course we have been worried about, ai,  machines as a race of, humans, for a long long time. I think the first anti-machine story was written in the Greek age about a kind of killer robot, and of course we’ve had the, terminator, and all sorts of machines taking over routine jobs.

We’re worried about these, machines, taking us over and being aggressive and of course somebody wise once said about, technology. We always overestimate the impact of, technology, in the short term; but underestimate it in the long term.

Technology, ai, in particular has long term implications for, leaders. Self-learning algorithms make, ai, smarter and smarter. It’s very difficult for the human brain to really get our heads around, AI,  but, leaders, are  starting to get ahead of the curve.

Transform your Mind TuneIn Radio
TuneIn Radio

My book, the Human Edge,  is a hopeful book.

I don’t think most, leaders,  should worry about, artificial intelligence,  unless your job is simple and can be replaced by a, machine.

Computer scientists call this an algorithmic job i.e routine. You can plan out every keystroke and every process within that job.

An example would be telemarketers, people who are on a script, jobs like those organizing data in a library, even long distance truck drivers; because autonomous driving is really, ai, technology. Another job going to, ai, is customer service, you can never get someone on the phone when you call major corporations anymore. The, ai, machine can have a conversation with callers and handle most calls without the help of a live agent.

Ai , technology will slice away the very routine tasks that we all do, like booking flights or booking a haircut or booking a restaurant.  What’s interesting is it leaves a, human, shaped hole for our careers. We’re seeing capabilities and skills that were admired as, leaders, in the early 80s to late 90s are now being admired again.

Leaders need the Human Edge
The Human Edge

Human Skills that can protect you against AI

Leaders, need Human skills, like:

  • passion,
  • gratitude,
  • empathy,
  • curiosity,
  • creativity, are valued.

 

LinkedIn looked at 20 million job applications in 2020. They noticed that employers are looking for , leaders, with ,  creative thinking. This is partly to do with, technology, coming into the workplace. Employers  need thinking outside the boxes.

Myrna – What is the difference between, creative thinking, and, critical thinking?

Greg-   Critical thinking, is being able to analyze a situation and come up with one solution.  It has always been admired in the workplace.  I think, critical thinking, is one of the top 10 skills employers are looking for in, leaders.

Transform your mind iTunes Podcast iTunes
Download on iTunes

The 4C’s of the Human Edge

Creative thinking, is a way of connecting one’s domain of knowledge over here with another over there and create a whole new innovation or idea. An example of , leaders, with , creative thinking, are Larry Page and Sergey Brin of Google.  Google is the creation of two ideas from different worlds that came together.

Myrna – In your book you talk about the 4Cs of the, Human Edge. What are they?

Greg – The first C is, consciousness. Consciousness, is the ability to find meaning in your work.

  • The second C is curiosity
  • The third  C is creativity
  • The fourth C is collaboration

Ai machines do not have Consciousness

Myrna – I love the one that you started with, consciousness, because, consciousness, is the big word today and encompasses, awareness, and spirituality. It is a great, human edge, because obviously, ai, doesn’t have, consciousness.  How are using it in this context of the, human edge?

Greg – Machines that use, artificial intelligence, don’t ask why? They ask “How do I do this, they ask what do you want to do, but they don’t ask why.”

Understanding why you do things has been a very powerful human trait especially for, leaders. Understanding and being able to articulate in some way your own why is hugely motivational.  It releases huge power in yourself as a person.  We’ve all met people who have a why and they’ve got shiny eyes and go the extra mile.  They’ll work through the night if necessary.

The science of neuroscience data shows that we can actually see the brain light up if you’re living a purposeful life or your best life. The brain  releases a chemical called, dopamine, which is the motivation molecule.

The other part of, consciousness, in my model is actually finding the time in your day to observe all the, leaders, and managers in your organization.  I literally meet thousands of, leaders, each year through the London business school. If we’re not careful the, ai, enabled algorithms that drive social media, our day is shattered into a thousand pieces and we never actually find time to be curious or creative.

Curiosity gives you a Human Edge

I talk a lot in,  The Human Edge,  about how you redesign your day to ensure that you have parts of it where you’re not being distracted.

Myrna – True, your why is very important. It’s the only thing that is actually going to get you to your end goal. If you know your why, you will persevere when life knocks you down.

How does, curiosity, give you a, human edge?

Greg – Organizations are asking for people who have built up their, curiosity, in order to drive their own learning.  What we’ve seen during the pandemic is many of the disruptors that were moving the world forward at a lightning pace have been accelerated.

One of my former clients, the World Economic Forum, estimate that something like every 18 months or so about 40 percent of what we know becomes obsolete  and we need to learn new things. So, the ability to learn rapidly and, curiosity, has  become hugely important for any career.

So, the magical thing about, curiosity, is it’s not a fixed trait.  You were born with blue eyes and  with certain physical factors that you can’t do anything about. Curiosity, is something that you can flex, develop. Like the mercury in a thermometer, it goes up and down depending on what you’re doing every day.  It’s like a muscle you can build it up.

Open Ended Questions foster Curiosity

One of the techniques I share for, leaders, in, The Human Edge,  to help you build up your, curiosity, is the Five hour rule.

Questions are good for, curiosity; but only a certain type of question. Open ended questions, is preferred to, closed questions.  I was a journalist once myself and, closed questions, are useful for checking information or sometimes you want a yes or no answer, but for, curiosity, you need, open ended questions.

Open ended questions, are really powerful for, leaders. Questions like:

  • What if we tried it this way?
  • Have you seen what those guys are doing over there?
  • Do you think we could do that too?

 

Open ended questions, not only to inspire your own, curiosity, but it sparks, curiosity,  it in the people around you.

Ai machines can’t come up with Creativity

Myrna – So now lets talk about, creativity. I know that it is like a top, human edge, because employers want, leaders, who think outside of the box. It is definitely a way to differentiate yourself from, ai.

Greg – Organizations need systems, they also need bureaucracy to run them because they’re very large entities; but what most of the, leaders, that I’m working with across multiple industries are trying to do is trying to find the space where there are fewer rules.

They encourage, leaders, to come with their ideas and, creativity. You cannot really be creative unless you’re first insatiably curious.  Curiosity,  is about asking questions, you’re interrogating the world and challenging the status quo, but you’re also importantly gathering cognitive fuel for your brain.

Creativity is the characteristic of the World’s Wealthiest

This is why if you look at the life stories of highly successful people, they all talk about, curiosity, and their ability to learn as a foundational skill.  Oprah Winfrey talked about, curiosity, and books getting her where she is today. Jeff Bezos was a was a curious learner.

Elon Musk is I think currently the world’s richest man. He has as disrupted multiple industries; but it’s important to realize that even Elon Musk talented he is. When he was as a young boy in South Africa before he came to Canada, he was not the finished product. Elon Musk built his ability to think differently and his, curiosity, through a lifelong of learning.  Spacex which is one of his more interesting ventures to disrupt commercial travel to the moon and beyond, got that idea, because he was so fascinated in rocketry and space travel.

Transform your Mind Stitcher
Transform your Mind Stitcher

How is Collaboration a Human Edge Characteristic

Myrna – Our last C is, collaboration. Collaboration, is a, human edge, of being able to bring talents together to create something bigger.

Collaboration, is what you need if you are creative, because you need to come together with other, humans, to get your ideas off the ground.

Greg – You’re correct Myrna. Collaboration, is a very human trait to be able to gather similar or maybe opposite characteristics and bring them together to create something big.

We’ve talked about, consciousness, that gives you the energy and the motivation and the time because of focus.  Then we touched on, curiosity, which gives you the fuel.

Collaboration, works when you have a large network of, collaborators. These people are more, innovative, because they’ve got these connections and people can help them with their ideas.  So, how do you ensure that your network is big enough and varied enough to help you?  Then I talk about experimentation, how you can take these ideas and test them very quickly get some data on it and feedback.

Business Book of the Year 2020 –  The Human Edge

Myrna – Your book was awarded Business Book of the Year, because you were talking about, leadership, skills for people and preventing, leaders, from being obsolete by the emergence of ,ai. You mentioned in your bio that you were redundant in 2008 and that’s basically what took you on this journey to discover the, human edge. If  we learn these skills can they insulates us from being redundant?

Greg – Absolutely, my story like most people’s, did not work out the way that I had planned. It’s the parts where you go wrong in the creative process, where you can learn the most and move forward.

Myrna – Tell our readers how they can get a copy of your book. You also speak all around the world so tell us how organizations can contact you if they’re interested in you speaking at one of their executive functions.

Greg – Thanks for the opportunity.  If people want to check out my work it’d be a great idea to just go to my website www.gregorme.com  there they can see some videos of me speaking and they can actually get in touch with me through the get in touch function on the website.

Conclusion

There’s one other thing, I’ve just launched something that’s really taking off.  A newsletter called the Curious Human. This is a complimentary email sent straight to your inbox once a month.

This is the kind of byproduct you were talking about on your podcast. A byproduct of a business writer’s life, because I’m always writing my Forbes pieces or my new books or I have got a great podcast I’ve heard or an interesting book I’ve read or an article or a video.  What I do each month is I share that in a two-minute kind of bulletin to the people who have signed up for my emails.

You can sign up on my website, at the bottom of every page there’s a space where you can sign up for the newsletter. If they’d would like to follow me on social media, I think the best place is LinkedIn, that is where I’m most active.

I’d be delighted to connect with people.  Also, on Forbes I’ve got my own regular column.  If you put Greg Orme Forbes in the search, I will come up. I’m writing regularly on Forbes.

The book “The Human Edge: How curiosity and creativity are your superpowers in the digital economy” is on Amazon and anywhere books are sold.

Follow Myrna Young and this podcast:

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Additional Resources

How to Program Yourself for Positive Change

How to Release Childhood Trauma of Guilt Shame

Healing ourselves from Childhood Trauma

Trauma, is a shock to the, nervous system. And when, childhood trauma, is stored instead of released, it can cause physical and, mental health, issues down the road. When, trauma, occurs,  in an effort of protection, your brain temporarily pauses your memory processing system, and the experience is not stored as traditional memories.

Today I am talking with Emily Francis. Emily  is the best selling author of “Healing Ourselves Whole”

Listen to the full interview here:

 

Healing Ourselves Whole will give you the tools you need to clean your emotional house from top to bottom, complete with journal prompts and access to audio meditations for you to listen along to as you read.

As a trained, body worker, Emily Francis offers a refreshing perspective into healing, trauma. She reveals unique knowledge of the body as a holder for memory. Emily will lead you on a path deep within yourself to rearrange the ways that, pain, and, trauma, have been holding you back from whole body, mind, spirit, and, energy healing. You will rearrange the dialogue within your body memory systems as well as learn a practice to re-birth by healing your, inner child, and adolescent selves, coming into the present to create the best adult self possible.

This groundbreaking interactive book contains a journal and access to audio meditations for you to listen to as you read. The meditations will help you dig deep into past, trauma, and discover when and how, trauma, took root. Learn to get in touch with various parts of the physical and, energy body, and how to use them to let go of stored, traumas, and rediscover the deeply held joys that have also been stored within the body. From this, you will learn to live from a new mindful and powerful space.

book: Healing Ourselves Whole from trauma
book: Healing Ourselves Whole

How to release trauma from the body

My Psychotherapist told me to do something called catch and release. Which means whenever you catch yourself being triggered by past, trauma. This happens whenever you begin to feel bad, and you are not sure why. Whenever you feel your body going into reaction mode,  breathe in and then release it.  This allows the feelings you have stuffed down to come out.

Myrna – Emily can you share with our readers how they can  to us start to release, traumatic experiences, from their body?

Emily – In my book, Healing Ourselves Whole, I help my readers put their own hands on their body. When I am helping my clients in person, I help them, release trauma,  in their body by putting my hands on their body to help them locate where the, trauma, had gone in, or the shame, or the guilt.

Why our bodies hold Trauma

Our muscles and tissues store the memory of, trauma.  They also store memories of Joy.  That’s my work; but I couldn’t write a book and teach you how to do Hands On Healing, so I wrote a book teaching you how to dialogue inside your body.  This book “Healing Ourselves Whole” has a chapter for every emotion we hold in our body. We go through a 15 to 20-minute meditation on releasing, body trauma.

The workbook included with the book allows you to journal and go through all the senses to find the, trauma, carrot or the shame carrot or the guilt or grief. I teach you through this book how to do the body work by yourself. I’m not a therapist, so some behaviors and thoughts still need to be treated by, hypnosis therapy, like EMDR.

I work on the part of the body that is holding the, pain, and blocking the healing, so you still need your, cognitive therapist.

Childhood trauma and body trauma are connected

I have some, childhood trauma, and I know that until I became conscious that I was stuffing things down instead of understanding my emotions, I never understood that my, childhood trauma, was influencing my present. My, childhood trauma, also affected my relationships earlier in life before I was able to start to release them.

This is a great topic on releasing, chronic pain, because some people go to their graves not understanding that their quality of life was hampered by, what happened to them. Sometimes the, wounds, were only from, childhood, but relationships earlier in their lives eg.  lovers, friends, teachers etc.

Emily, what made you become a wellness expert?

I graduated undergraduate with a science and, wellness, degree then I went on to become an aerobic yoga instructor. Then I started suffering from extreme panic attacks and agoraphobia, so I went from loving to be on the stage, to not wanting to leave my house.  I was a college cheerleader, I worked out every day, I was at the gym three to five hours a day teaching different classes and I was like rocking.

The more crowded the better.  I fed off the energy and then I turned twenty-five!  I stopped drinking and the mask dropped and the crazy came up. All the, pain, that I had stuff down came to a flying head and I had to stop myself from extreme anxiety and panic attacks.

It took seven years for me to understand that the reason for my anxiety and panic attacks were because of, childhood trauma, that I had stuffed down. I missed a lot of my hot years as a young adult because I couldn’t hang out with friends or go to bars without feeling like I was crazy.  I really stepped away from life and just sat out and watched life pass me by. My, mental health, was of grave concern to me.  I prayed a lot.  I did a lot of intensive work, meditative work.  I went to a million different, healers.  if I heard of something for, body trauma, I was there.  I went through 7 years of, holistic therapy, and nothing worked until I finally broke down and tried a child’s dose of an antidepressant.

When I was able to heal myself, I want to share and that is why I wrote the book Healing Ourselves Whole

Google Podcast Transform Your Mind
Google Podcast Transform Your Mind

Can medications help with Childhood Trauma?

After 7 years of looking for a treatment, I came across a book by a psychotherapist named Tom Rutledge.  He suggested medications. I tried it and it worked for me. The antidepressant worked because it regulated my brain and here is the thing that I learnt from Tom.  I was reading his book and embracing fear and I decided to write this letter to him. I wrote that I was a big phony and a liar, and I’ve been writing all these years and it was  just crap.  I am crap and I wrote this long letter.  It was like reading my autobiography. I just wrote out all the things I had been telling myself all these years.

Tom Rutledge replied that I should consider medication. He said that we must first regulate the brain before we can start the healing process and suggested that we should try medication. I rejected medication, because it goes against everything, I believe in.  It goes against my holistic principal, it was a Band-Aid. I said no I’m not interested, and he wrote back. He said there’s a part that I think you’ve missed, the brain and the mind are not the same thing.  The mind is where your thoughts and behaviors are, the brain is an organ in your body. It’s like your heart or your liver or kidneys.  You would not hesitate to take medication if your heart or liver or kidneys were malfunctioning.

But, mental illness, comes with a stigma. People hesitate to take medication because they feel it makes them crazy. Antidepressants are just something to regulate your brain. The brain is an organ and you’re missing some chemicals in your brain and that is the reason for the anxiety and panic attacks.  Once you get that regulated all the work that you’ve done because you’ve done significant with healers will be able to come through.

Book: Hollywood endings How to get one
Book: Hollywood endings How to get one

Hollywood Endings and How to Get One

 Yes, you can create what you want with imagination an intention. The movie themes the world loves are few and simple; they are the themes that have been portrayed over and over since Hollywood began to make movies. These classics have the most wonderful endings: love overcomes all; good defeats evil; the wayward child comes home. Anyone can be a hero, and everyone has a Guardian Angel.

Hollywood Endings – Using Imagination and Intention is about self-awareness, recovery and enlightenment. It’s for anyone who has ever wanted or dreamed of having a “Hollywood ending.” It is for those of us who never had a role model to show us how it’s done. It celebrates the wonder of the movies and urges us to see movies once to be entertained, and then return to see them again to learn from them. We all deserve a Hollywood ending. This book can show you how with life lessons from Dances With Wolves, National Velvet, Die Hard, and The Color Purple, to name a few.

Rewrite your own story and give it a Hollywood ending.

Soundcloud Transform your mind podcast
Transform your Mind Soundcloud podcast

Trauma gets stuck in the body

Trauma, gets attached to your tissues, because the experience of stress, particularly, childhood trauma, causes stress and can trigger active survival responses of fight, flight, or freeze. When your, body trauma, can’t activate or complete these responses, those sensations become trapped in your nervous system.

Trauma, is a shock to the, nervous system. And when that, trauma, is stored instead of released, it can cause physical and, mental health, issues down the road. When, trauma, occurs,  in an effort of protection, your brain temporarily pauses your memory processing system, and the experience is not stored as traditional memories.

Instead of being stored as a complete memory, traumatic experiences are thought to be stored as fragments of pictures of, body sensations or, body trauma.  These fragments are unprocessed and thus don’t fit in the system as they should. Because they don’t fit, these fragments can surface unexpectedly as nightmares, flashbacks, or general angst and unease. Most of the time you don’t know why you are feeling uneasy.

Transform Your Mind iHeart Radio
iHeart Radio

How to Release Trauma Trapped in the Body

International Trauma-Healing Institute founder Gina Ross has developed a simple process called Emotion Aid. Here is a summary of those steps you can use to begin to,  release trauma, trapped in your body.

  1. First, assess where you are: rate your stress or upset from a low of 1 to a high of 7. If it is high, first practice the following Grounding Steps.
    1. Begin by Butterfly Hugging and Tapping– hug yourself and then alternately tap on your arms, from side to side, 25 times. Then take a deep breath. Repeat this until your stress level begins to drop noticeably.
    2. Next, Send Roots into the Ground. Notice your feet or, if your seated, your back, buttocks, and back of your legs in the chair.  Now notice your feet or lower body being firmly connected to the floor, then to the ground, like roots going deep into the earth. Take a deep breath. Then gaze about the room and notice objects or textures about the room, remaining connected to your “roots.”
    3. Finally, Notice Breathing: Put one hand on your chest and one hand your belly. Now just be with your breath, not trying to change it, but just noticing the rhythm of it. Then make a heart shape with your fingertips and bring awareness to your beating heart.

How to discharge body trauma

  1. Now begin to Discharge Sensations and Release Stress.
    1. First, notice your breath and Breathe Notice any sensations that come up naturally. As you release, trauma, and  stress hormones, they will present through sensations like shaking, heat, sweating, yawning, goosebumps, changed breath, and gurgling in the stomach. Be curious about the feelings and be with them, and they will naturally discharge. Do not judge or critique what you are feeling or sensing.
    2. Next, briefly review the, childhood trauma, or troubling thoughts that lead to the sensations. As you review, notice the Feelings that come up as you consider what happened. It’s important to go slow so that you’re only allowing the activation of one feeling at a time. Just be with it and give it plenty of time. Then notice the discharge that emerges as you follow the sensations. (Know that you can temporarily set aside sensations and emotions that you are not focusing on at the moment. For example, imagine putting them on a shelf for the moment.)
    3. Then work with the Thoughts. Again, as you notice one thought at a time, observe the sensations that show up with these thoughts. Let go of the judgment or criticism. Just be present and continue to observe what happens next and experience the sensations discharging and releasing from the body.
    4. Now notice and bring to awareness Resources. A resource is anything that feels strong and calm to you. These can be external (for example, the kind eyes of a good friend) or internal (perhaps the memory of a personal achievement). As you recall or hold these resources notice the sensations that show up in your body. Take a few minutes to feel the sense of calm and strength in your body.

Conclusion

Listen to Emily radio show All About Healing 

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Additional Resources

Drug and Alcohol Treatment for Women with Trauma

How to Adapt to New Abnormal after Coronavirus Pandemic

Coronavirus pandemic

The, coronavirus pandemic, has changed the world forever.  We would never return to the way we used to be, so we now have to adapt to the, new abnormal.

Is really important clearly, we’re making some bad decisions around the, coronavirus pandemic, and how we’ll recover from it. We are heading into a, new abnormal of, cognitive bias.  These are the  dangerous judgment errors that people are making around the, coronavirus,  pandemic, and their false assumptions of what’s going to happen in the, new abnormal, because we’ll never go back to before January 2020.

Dr Gleb Tsipursky, disaster avoidance expert, says that he has no crystal ball; but as a behavioral, economic, and, cognitive neuroscientist, his expertise is in recognizing the blind spots in our nature as well as, cognitive bias, that lead us to miss reality and make disastrous errors in our decision making. Find out how you can avoid disaster when the, coronavirus pandemic, is over.

Listen to the full interview Here:

 

Introduction to Cognitive Bias and the Coronavirus Pandemic

These, cognitive bias,  errors are costing lives and ruining livelihoods.  The information shared today will help you keep you safe and enable you to plan for the future in the, new abnormal, after the, coronavirus pandemic.

Myrna – Tell us what made you write the Book: Resilience Adapt and Plan for the New Abnormal of the COVID – 19 Coronavirus Pandemic.

Dr Gleb – I wrote the book after seeing lots of folks make some bad decisions around the, coronavirus pandemic, and their assumptions of what’s going to happen after the, coronavirus pandemic.

When I was first investigating the, new abnormal, as a behavioral economist, and, cognitive neuroscientist, risk management expert; I’ve been various sorts of future forecasting future proofing.  That we address the threats and maximize the opportunities that come to us in the future.

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What I saw was that people were just dismissing, COVID-19, as a disease in the middle of somewhere in Wuhan China.  I started investigating and found Wuhan is a huge city it’s 11 million people. It produces over 22 billion dollars in revenue.  It’s called the Chicago of China.  Wuhan is a transportation industrial hub with over 200 international flights per day.

It’s very well-developed city modern city and the, medical infrastructure, completely collapsed because of the, coronavirus pandemic. When you look at what was happening in January and February 2020, I could forecast the dangers of the, coronavirus pandemic. We are seeing this happen now in India as their, medical unfractured, has completely collapsed.

The Normalcy Bias and the coronavirus pandemic

Is really important clearly, we’re making some bad decisions around the, coronavirus pandemic, and how we’ll recover from it. We are heading into a, new abnormal. Cognitive biases, the dangerous judgment errors that people are making around the, coronavirus pandemic, and their false assumptions of what’s going to happen afterward because we’ll never go back to January 2020.

One of the biggest, cognitive biases, that causes us to make bad decisions not simply around the, coronavirus pandemic; but any sort of situation that might result in a major disaster is called the, normalcy bias.   The, normalcy bias, refers to us perceiving that the future will be much like the past.

We’re unable to really make good predictions and trend lines, for example, the fiscal crisis of 2008-2009. It was pretty clear that the rising housing prices was going to be unsustainable for houses.  It was it was clear; but people kept buying and then everything crashed.

Because I have this feeling this gut reaction this, normalcy bias, the natural implication or conclusion is that infrastructure without interventions will also be as badly affected as Wuhan and Northern Italy and, medical infrastructure, collapse.

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Myrna – so the, cognitive bias, is what you’re saying that people look at the past and normalize the future.

What is Anchoring in the coronavirus pandemic

Dr Gleb – An example of a, cognitive bias, is called, anchoring. Anchoring, refers to looking at what we know about a topic and using that as a filter for all future subsequent information about a topic. The, coronavirus pandemic, started in China in November 2019 and nobody expected it to come this way because, Sars and all the other, coronaviruses, stayed isolated in the African countries.

They did not realize that this, coronavirus pandemic, would cause the collapse of a major modern medical infrastructure and none of these, coronaviruses, were not nearly as infectious as, COVID-19, coronavirus.

So, people were using their past information to judge all future events and this is a, cognitive bias.

Anchoring, causes us to make really bad decisions in a number of areas including the, coronavirus pandemic.  The, normalcy bias, and, anchoring, are all applying to the world after, COVID-19. We anchored we look at the past, coronaviruses, we look at the flu because a lot of people were comparing the, coronavirus pandemic, it to the flu and we made some bad decisions.

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What is the cognitive bias that we need to remove in the New Abnormal?

In order to move forward, we know now that we underestimated, COVID-19, and now there’s another strain.  This is a very intelligent virus; it keeps changing a lot.

The first, cognitive bias, we need to remove in the, new abnormal, is called, hyperbolic discounting.  What we tend to do as human beings our intuition, our feelings causes us to be very oriented toward the short term. Toward what’s going to happen in the next few moments and discount the importance of the long-term future.

This new strain has collapsed the medical infrastructure in South Africa, Brazil and the United Kingdom.  The latest information is they’re more deadly than the current, coronavirus, strains.

The, coronavirus vaccine, are somewhat less effective on these new stains. The effectiveness of the Pfizer, coronavirus vaccine, goes from 90 percent to 70 percent effective. That means this new strain of, coronavirus, will become dominant in the USA sometime by March or April of 2021.

 

How to Prepare for the new dominant strain of coronavirus

  • Get into strict lockdown, because if you get sick with, COVID-19, you will be facing no prospect of getting into a hospital because the hospitals will be full.  Also don’t do anything that might be considered dangerous.  Don’t go skiing, don’t travel, don’t use power tools around the house etc.
  • You need to get supplies because there will be supply disruptions of various sorts. People will get into panic buying again. So you want to protect yourself now by securing supplies for yourself and your family.
  • You want to talk to your boss about working from home because this will be a bad time. If you cannot work from home, you should consider looking for another job.

 

Are we immune from the new strain of COVID-19 if we had the first strain?

If you caught the, COVID-19, then you are immune for at least three months.

But you can still catch this new strain of, COVID-19.  There are some cases where people do get re-infected and that depends on their physiology.

How do we adapt to the new normal of, working from home, social distancing, finding love on the internet because all the bars are closed?

What kind of, cognitive bias, do we have to remove?

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Cognitive Bias, the planning fallacy

Dr Gleb – One the, cognitive bias, that I think is really important is called the, planning fallacy.  The, planning fallacy, refers to making plans and expecting the world will go according to our plans.  You’ve probably heard the phrase failing to plan is planning to fail.

Unfortunately, the, planning fallacy, is the idea that our plans will often not go according to plan; but because of the, planning fallacy, we don’t put in enough resources to adapt to a new situation or contingencies risks and problems. We don’t pivot our plans nearly as quickly as we should.

So, you want to be aware that your plans for a life after, COVID-19, and getting back to January 2020 is very unlikely to come true because the, coronavirus pandemic, has already impacted our habits our values.  What we care about, and our norms.

We need to get ready for a world that after, COVID-19, will be a bit more virtual, crowds may be uncomfortable, meeting strangers at a bar will be uncomfortable. You will feel anxious around other people.

 

Business will do business different after COVID-19 pandemic

The world will stay virtual for example. Your meeting with your insurance agent will be virtual.

  • Real estate showings will remain virtual,
  • coaching will be virtual.
  • Many service professionals and sales people who are providing therapy or coaching services will remain virtual.

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Tell us about your book Resilience: Adapt and Plan for the New Abnormal of the COVID-19, Coronavirus Pandemic.

My book talks about how businesses, and individuals can adapt to this new abnormal during the last stage of, COVID-19 pandemic. The post recovery, how do you effectively collaborate virtually, for example.

How many people have taken the time to do a course in professional development on how to have effective virtual communication? After, COVID-19, if you are a more effective virtual communicator than other folks you can compete more effectively.

In the book that I talk about how to effectively survive and thrive in the last stage of, COVID-19, and the post recovery in a more virtual world, in a world characterized by more anxiety around interactions, in a world with supply chains disruptions.

How are you going to make sure that your business supply chains are protected?  You need to make a strategic plan for yourself. My book goes for the specific steps on the ways that you go about making a strategic

Plan for yourself as an individual and if you are a business leader within a business or if you’re a team leader with a team.

How do listeners get a copy of your book and connect to you?

My book is available in bookstores everywhere.  Readers or listeners can

get in touch with me from my blogs, videos podcasts, articles on my website www.disasteravoidanceexperts.com You can go to disaster avoidanceexperts.com/subscribe for a free eight video based course on making the wisest decisions and managing risks.

For those of you watching on YouTube would love you to subscribe to the channel.

If you’re listening on iTunes please subscribe and rate and review the podcast so that we’ll be able to reach a wider audience.

I would like to invite you all to join my Facebook group called Lifecoach

we have inspiration messages daily from numerous coaches.

Additional Resources

https://blog.myhelps.us/is-5g-poisoning-coronavirus-symptoms/

Coronavirus: How to Protect Yourself

How to Write Your Own Hollywood Ending

Hollywood ending life story

A lot of times if you believe it and pray about it your, Hollywood movie, will turn out exactly the way that you want it to be. If we use our imagination, we can create our, Hollywood ending. Think of that bad job you are in and create your, Hollywood movie, with your own, Hollywood ending with you in your dream job, in your dream relationship and your dream family.  First you must have the baseline of, self-awareness, then you use your imagination to write the script. Where do I want to get to, what’s my goal?  You are the Director, Producer and star of your Life Movie.

My guest today is Linda Flanders, Author of “Hollywood Endings and How to Get One”

Years ago, my pastor preached a message that when we’re born there is a blank page.  We have a beginning, and we have an ending and in the middle we are supposed to write our story. We are the director of our life movie, producer and the Star in our, Hollywood ending.

Listen to the full interview Here 

Writing your Hollywood Ending

Yes, you can create what you want with imagination an intention. The movie themes the world loves are few and simple; they are the themes that have been portrayed over and over since Hollywood began to make movies. These classics have the most wonderful endings: love overcomes all; good defeats evil; the wayward child comes home. Anyone can be a hero, and everyone has a Guardian Angel.

Hollywood Endings – Using Imagination and Intention is about self-awareness, recovery and enlightenment. It’s for anyone who has ever wanted or dreamed of having a “Hollywood ending.” It is for those of us who never had a role model to show us how it’s done. It celebrates the wonder of the movies and urges us to see movies once to be entertained, and then return to see them again to learn from them. We all deserve a Hollywood ending. This book can show you how with life lessons from Dances With Wolves, National Velvet, Die Hard, and The Color Purple, to name a few.

Book: Hollywood endings How to get one
Book: Hollywood endings How to get one

Rewrite your own story and give it a Hollywood ending.

Linda has been a, FeldenKrais, practitioner for 30 years and an independent video producer. Flanders and her sister Dr Dorothy Halla-Poe created the, matrix model, an innovative way to work with children’s atypical behavior and, learning disabilities.  They specialized in using the, filmmaking, process as a learning and teaching tool, focusing on projects that are educational and promote social and personal change.

Myrna – I love the idea of using the, Hollywood movie, and, filmmaking, process as a learning tool to help children with, learning disabilities.  Can you share how that works.

Linda – I am a, Feldenkrais, practitioner and have been for 30 years and while that particular mode of learning has to do with learning, self-awareness, and learning through options.  I started working with young children who needed physical therapy and occupational therapy; but their behavior was such that they were absolutely out of control and scared the, physical therapist, on the, occupational therapist.

I started working with children behavior focusing specifically on self-awareness and self-control. If we have those two things, we can pretty much guide our own, Hollywood ending. If we do not have them, then we are vulnerable to so many awful things that can happen in our life.  If we cannot control ourselves and become the, Director, in our own, Hollywood movie, somebody else is going to control us.

 

I started using making, movies, as a fun activity with children and what I found was that even with multiple, psychiatric labels, attached to them and very bizarre behaviors, they all listened to the, director, if they played a part in a, movie.

 

When they had a camera in their face and the, director, said do this; they did it without hesitation. No attitude or behavioral issues. The children also loved watching themselves over and over in their, Hollywood movie. Science has shown that kids watching themselves act a certain way reinforces new neural pathways in their brain of new behavior.

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Transform your Mind Soundcloud podcast

The, Feldenkrais method, is an educational way of learning to teach self-awareness.

Myrna – I understand the behavioral piece in making a, Hollywood movie; but I don’t understand how making a, movie, helps children with, learning disabilities.

Linda – In making our, Hollywood movie, I had them freeze for the camera while I ran around with the camera to a different angle, because that’s how a, Hollywood movie,  is made.

The children had to be in the, present moment, and they had to control themselves from the inside out. That is the huge piece of, self-control, and if they can gain, self-control, then they’ve got a better opportunity in school to be able to learn the different topics that they needed to learn.

In making a, Hollywood movie, they became much more aware of themselves and what they could do and what they couldn’t do. When they fell apart and got angry or sad or wanted to be the star of the, Hollywood movie, those issued had to be worked out during the filming of the, movie.

Myrna – That’s great and innovative. I hope teachers who are listening will take some cues from you because now we all can make, Hollywood movies, with our cell phones!

Hollywood Endings and How to Get One

Let’s transition into your book.  You wrote the book “Hollywood Endings and How to Get One” Tell us what would you like the readers to walk away with after reading your book.

Linda – Absolutely, it is a, self-help book, or a, self-improvement book. It teaches, mindfulness, helps with raising, self-awareness, on topics like “are you happy” “are you content with your job” etc.

The book teaches the science of, mindfulness, of paying attention to the moment, so you are fully present. In the science world this is called, neuroplasticity.  Change your brain, change your life.

If we use our imagination, we can create our, Hollywood ending. You think of that bad job you are in and create your, Hollywood movie, with your own, Hollywood ending. First you must have the baseline of, self-awareness, then you use your imagination to write the script. Where do I want to get to, what’s my goal?

Transform Your Mind iHeart Radio
iHeart Radio

Your Hollywood Ending doesn’t have to be romantic

The idea of the, Hollywood ending, is not necessarily a romantic one, it could be any goal you have. If you reach that goal that’s a, Hollywood ending.

Myrna – When you were talking my mind went directly to the, Hollywood movie, Pretty Woman.

The movie started with the words, Hollywood, where dreams were made, anything is possible in, Hollywood! It ended with the same words.

But in the movie specifically Julia Roberts had a dream. She had a dream of her own, Hollywood ending.   She actually told Richard Gere in the movie hey “all the time I was dreaming you about my Prince Charming, I would dream I would be locked up into this room in this castle and the prince would climb up and he would rescue me. Nowhere in my, Hollywood ending, did he say I’m going to put you up in a condo as my mistress.

It’s really true, if you’ve got a goal and you’ve got a dream of your movie of life having a, Hollywood ending, it’s very hard for someone to knock you off of it.  Which is why she didn’t accept that offer which she said was a good offer for a girl like her.

She had gained, self-awareness, in that whole process of being a highly paid call girl for a week.

Linda – In the book I do explain the three systems of the brain.  I’m not a, neuroscientist;  but the information’s out there,  I  simply simplified it.

The Brain Systems

  1. The producer brain, because without a producer you don’t have a, Hollywood movie. The producer brain is the, reptilian brain, and that keeps us breathing. It keeps our heart beating. So, we don’t have a lot of control over that one
  2. The, limbic system, is the home of the emotions and we can live there we can, but we can also get stuck there. You can become a drama queen always reacting to life instead of working in the direction we want to go.
  3. The cerebral cortex, the Director brain. That’s where we plan, where we use our own judgment, where we use our common sense, our reasoning.

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There’s another movie that Julia Roberts was in called “Sleeping with the Enemy” where she is in a very abusive domestic violence situation.  I talk about that movie in my book, because if you can’t leave a situation, you can watch that movie and get ideas to leave your situation.

In the, Hollywood movie, she planned her escape. She learnt to swim, she selected her disguises so her husband could not find her, she picked a place that she would live. She imagined her, Hollywood ending. She set all the pieces in order first, then she made her escape and that’s what I’m teaching in the book.  We could use, Hollywood movies, and our imagination to write our own, Hollywood ending.

Myrna – So you want readers to walk away with the vision that they can direct their lives. They can plan it out, they can be a director, the producer of their own lives, because their life is like a, Hollywood movie.

Linda – Yes, each chapter there is a list of a few things to do. The first one is go watch a, Hollywood movie, but I want you to watch this movie through this lens, so that you’re watching the movie from a different perspective.  You’re gaining awareness from watching that movie. For example in the, Hollywood movie, Die Hard, with Bruce Willis.

In that movie there are places where Bruce Willis is so emotionally distraught, that he’s not thinking.  He throws some C4 down an elevator chute without recognizing that it’s gonna explode and where’s that explosion gonna come?  It’s gonna come right back up the chute into his face. That’s an example of us doing something without thinking of the consequences which blows up in our face.

Myrna – I don’t know much about movies or directing, but I know as a, Life coach, I always teach that we’re the director of our own lives, because we make the decisions and direct our choices.

What is the FeldenKrais Method

One of the things within, Feldenkrais model, is taught through movement.  We teach awareness, options and choice, but these lessons are taught through the avenue of movement.  One of the classic lessons in the, Feldenkrais, community is called a pelvic clock. It’s the ability to get your pelvis moving in all the different directions of a clock.  It’s better to be able to move a little bit in all these directions than a whole lot just one way, so it’s definitely the opposite of one-way thinking.

In my work with children I teach them how to create a clock from clay. They have to make the clock and they have to make the one, two, three, four all the way to twelve.  Then they have to make a little person and put the person in the center of the clock.  The idea what if you altered your behavior just a little bit. Just a little bit to move to the next number on the clock.  Step by step by step. You don’t have to stop doing something just change it a little bit.

It could be drug use, overeating or alcohol in adults. The idea is its okay if you can’t completely stop drinking but can you cut back a little bit with awareness. If you can’t make a small change, then you become aware that you have a real problem.

It’s this intertwining of movement and thinking with our emotions that get tied up in this knot and through the Feldenkrais method of movement and awareness you can break those up and then make small changes.  Transformation comes faster because you’ve incorporated movement as well as thinking and emotions.

FeldenKrais Method uses movement to achieve change 

Myrna – Yes that is the mind and body connection as taught in Yoga.

Linda – If we want to become the director in our own, Hollywood movie, then this is simply a way that we can do it.  Shakespeare said that “the whole world is a stage and we’re just actors on it”

Myrna – In this day and age everybody’s got a camera, people are making big money just recording on their smart phones. You do not need the big fancy movie camera to record your own, Hollywood movie.

 

Free Feldenkrais Summit

From May 1st through May 10th there is a free online Feldenkrais summit that you want to invite our listeners and TV audience.

It’s an international summit, so for those whole two weeks you have presentations that come from, Feldenkrais, practitioners around the world who have taken their work and specialized in it.  You can learn about using this method to help with trauma. There is trauma from anyone who is victimized and has been traumatized.

Some have taken, Feldenkrais, into working with world-class athletes and top performers.

Some have taken it literally into working with animals. Linda Tellington Jones can do amazing things with animals.

I took it into behavior, so it could be applied in a whole bunch of different ways.

So, the summit has all these different international speakers. It is literally 24 hours of

Feldonkrais, awareness through movement.

It’s all free so it’s an opportunity for people to experience the, Feldenkrais method, and break up those muscular patterns so you can feel better. Because when you move better, you can feel better.

 

Register on www.feldenkraissummit.com

Conclusion

In closing a, Hollywood movie, I am going to suggest everybody go watch the, Hollywood movie, Baby Boom with Diane Keaton because in an instant she a New York executive and literally overnight she becomes a single parent of a toddler who had lost her parents.

She took the circumstances of her life and created her own, Hollywood ending.

It you found this content inspirational, Please remember to subscribe and leave a review on iTunes.  You are invited to join my private Facebook Group called “Lifecoach

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How to Find Success in Online Dating During COVID 19

Anwar White online dating coach

Online dating, during COVID 19 is happening the same way as online purchases and e-commerce. During the last year we have been buying most of everything online. Dating and relationship coach, Anwar White says for his clients, dating apps, are the primary way that they are meeting future partners or just, dating, in general. That’s going to be the case after, COVID 19, when things open back and we can date in person again.  I thing like e-commerce, 20% of people will remain on, dating apps.

I would like to welcome my newest audience which on the Preach the Word Worldwide Television Network.

Today we have an exciting topic for all you single ladies and single men out there.  We are going to be talking on the topic of How to Find Success Dating during COVID 19.

Listen to the full interview Here:

 

My guest today is dating and, relationship coach, Anwar White.  Anwar is going to share tips on, online dating, during these unprecedented times of, COVID 19, where everything is remote. Single women, can’t meet their date in person.

We want to include some information on, Christian dating.  The bible says in second Corinthians:

Do not be unequally yoked which means that Christians should look for partners in, marriage, where both of them share the same beliefs and practices such as praying, reading the bible and going to church.

Dating Tips on How to Get Your Guy

Myrna – Tell us your journey to becoming, dating coach, and podcast Host of the “How to Get Your Guy”. I guess the, dating, conversation is towards women.

Anwar – My name is Anwar White, and I have been helping the boys talk to the girls and the girls talked to the boys ever since elementary school.  I started doing this work as a, dating coach, when catching up with my female classmates and found out everything was going well in their life except for love.

It was so crazy to me because these women were the most amazing women. Well educated, beautiful and successful and yet they could not find a man.  So, I told them I’m taking over your love life! I slowly started working with a variety of my former classmates and we had lot of really great success. They were having boyfriends very quickly and they were getting married within two years.

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Helping Women of Color Date Effectively

I got certified as a, relationship coach, and started working with thousands of women and men all around the world.  I don’t want your listeners to think I focus just on women.

I am very focused on how men are thinking about, dating, and, relationships, as well.  So  I’ve been doing my own thing as an entrepreneur and coaching women all around the world, specifically, women of color.  Smart, successful, women of color, on how to heal their heart, how to date effectively and then, How to Get Their Guy, on my podcast.

Myrna -It sounds like you were born with the aptitude for this work because when people start doing things earlier on in life, it is usually their purpose. We are experiencing huge growth on, dating apps, and the, online dating, world During, COVID 19, pandemic. Do you think the, dating, world will be forever changed after, COVID 19?

Is online Dating Here to Stay

Anwar – I think about, online dating, the same way I think about online purchases and e-commerce. During the last year we have been buying most of everything online. I know for the clients that I work with, dating apps, is the primary way that they are meeting future partners or just, dating, in general. That that’s going to be the case after, COVID 19. When things open back and we can date in person again, I thing like e-commerce, 20% of people will remain on, dating apps.

It’s crazy because it’s similar in terms of, online dating.  Roughly 20% of, relationships, came from, online dating, right now that looks like a little bit more like 40 to 50%.

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How can one find success dating during COVID 19

Anwar- It depends on what their definition of success means. For some marriage is not their end goal, they just want to connect with someone. My clients have different wants and desires.  The other thing that I wanted to about success in, online dating, is specifically during this time is that we have the time to self-reflect and to have more self-awareness.

You have to bring your whole entire self to this, love game, or you’re not going to be successful. If you’re you not addressing the things that you have been avoiding or ignoring or ashamed of and you’re hiding those parts of yourself, then people are not really getting to know you or able to love you fully.  So, take this time to address and heal some of those things so that when they are meeting their person, they can be ready to be the best partner that they can be.

Myrna – Do you think that people can do self-reflection themselves or they’re hiring a, dating coach, like you for instance.

Hiring a Dating Coach Helps you become your best self

Anwar –  Some are hiring a, dating coach, I think the coaching industry has exploded. People have had the time and space to sit back, exhale and be like oh I’m not happy about these things.  Instead of working and doing that rat race.

Coaches can help you with those blind spots to accelerate that work and potentially that healing to get you to your goal faster.

Myrna – 95% of us are not living conscious lives which means that they can’t sit down and self-evaluate or see their blind spots.

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What are the top, dating, mindset shifts that are critical to successful, Online dating?

Anwar – I think there are a couple of things when I think about kind of mindset shifts when it comes to, dating. First is a lot of people try to date their clone, someone who’s just like them.  If I am from the Caribbean and I am a Christian and I work in IT, that is who they want to partner with.

I have a really great success rate in terms of getting my clients partnering with someone who is not their clone. I think it’s important for us to realize that we have to be more open-minded when it comes to, dating, and realize that it’s not about what their resume or what their paper looks like; it’s really about how they’re making me feel.

I work with smart and successful women.  My clients are Harvard educated and most of them has a list of the things they want in a man. We have to shift our mindset around, you had an amazing time with this person.

On the men’s side it’s about really how she looks and how seductive she is and her

curvature and all of that, so we have to think beyond that and really focus in on the things that are going to fulfill us from a long-term perspective, because chemistry is short lived.

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Is Compatibility more important than Chemistry in Dating?

Another mindset shift that I want us to be thinking about is, compatibility vs chemistry.  How we how we vibe, how we connect, how we mesh.  I always think of, compatibility, is. Can we make a thousand decisions in one day together?  Because that’s really what being a really in a, relationship, is all about.  You must be able to be on the same page on a lot of different subjects.

The mindset shift is about prioritizing, compatibility, over, chemistry. I think a lot of people are focused on the, chemistry, when they’re, dating, and not the, compatibility.  The, chemistry, is those butterflies in my stomach.  Chemistry, chemically fades within 18 months from our body and then all you are left with is, compatibility.

When you look at, divorce rates, those first two years are so crucial, because often times what happens is that, chemistry, starts to fade during that time.

Dating Advice on Finding the Right Guy

If you’re a woman out there and you want a guy that is making six figures that’s great; but that’s only nine percent of the population.

  • If you want a guy who is six feet tall, that’s good; but that’s roughly eight percent of the population
  • If you want a man with a graduate degree that’s six percent of people out there
  • If you want someone who owns their own home that’s 20% of the population.
  • Multiply all of that together you actually have a one percent chance of finding your guy and that’s not even taking into account if that person likes you back.

You must know how this, love game, works. Nine out of the ten people that you meet are not going to be the one. Knowing the numbers ahead of time saves your heart and saves any of the mental chatter, you know of the stories that you tell yourself.  The ones that don’t serve you, I am not good enough, I will never meet the right guy.

Additional Resources

Are you waiting on Love? How Single Women over 40 Find Love

 

How to Rewrite Your Life Story and Achieve Organizational Wellness

Rewrite your life story

When you rewrite your, life story, you can start living on purpose.  You can then transcend the negative stuff from your story all the things that makes you uncomfortable. When you do this as a leader, you can then show up in your organization as your best self and that contributes to, organizational wellness.

My guest today is Sam Morris, Managing Director and chief Culture Officer at Five to Flow LLC, a global collective that builds integrative, organizational wellness, solutions designed to achieve and sustain, peak performance.

Listen to the full interview Here:

Coach Myrna Life Story

I want to start off by sharing my, life story.

I decided to think about my, life story, I realized that as a youth I didn’t identify with my, life story.

My, life story, is that I was born in a very poor Third World Country, Guyana. My mother and father didn’t have much. Both my grandmother and my mom were domestic servants. During that time, I was also, sexually abused.

I never identified with that, story, because somehow God put in my heart and spirit all of the things that I was good at an early age.  I was good in school, I had a great personality, teachers liked me etc. Now that I’m a, life coach, in the personal development space, trying to motivate and inspire others;  the, story, that I tell myself now is that I was born for greater things.

The, life story, of my birth to me is just basically like Jesus, we were both born in poverty and lack in order to transform you into a spiritual teacher.

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Helping Men Rewrite their Life Story

Myrna – Sam you mentioned that you help men overcome their, life stories, traumas, and blocks to be the men the world need them to be.  I’m assuming that you have a, life story, that somehow parallels this, because we have to go through something before you can help other people do the same.

What is your, life story?

Sam – My, life story, is that I was born with my umbilical cord wrapped around my neck, so I couldn’t breathe. From birth to almost 30 years of my life, I was extremely sick.  I had severe food allergies, actually a long list of food allergies. People say that I was allergic to basically everything except water and air; but then a therapist affectionately pointed out to me that actually I was allergic to air, because I also had asthma!

There was a period in my mother’s womb when she thought she had cancer, she didn’t know she was pregnant.  So my energies and my soul and my spirit were immediately put into fighting to survive mode.

As a child and adult, self-love, was not a part of my vocabulary or thought process. I had this idea that I needed to fight for breath and also fight for love.

Overcoming Your Life Story

My, life story, became that in order to be loved, someone had to save me. People were constantly having to save me from my asthma attacks and choking, and this saving mentality got imprinted on my heart as this is what love looks like.

If I am in a relationship with a woman, friend, parents or family member, I believed that for anyone to show me that they loved me they have to somehow save me.

Later in life, I battled addiction from my early 20s into my late 30s.  Really hardcore destructive addiction.

So my, life story, of being needing to be saved was very detrimental and destructive to me and that is why I coach men on how to rewrite their, life story.

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Your Life Story and Organizational Wellness

Myrna – How does rewriting your, life story, help with organizational, wellness, and, peak performance?

Sam – Your story, is important in, organizational culture. The, culture, is where I focus all my all my energies on.  Five to Flow focuses on the, organizational culture, because a culture of, inclusivity, allows an organization to thrive.  By, inclusivity, I mean the whole, diversity and inclusion, conversation. The, inclusion, I’m talking about here is the, culture, of feeling safe, allowing your employees to be creative, to be innovative, to show up for work as their best self!

When you rewrite your, life story, around I’m living my purpose, I’m transcending the negative stuff.  I’m transcending my negative story, I’m transcending that, lifestory, that keeps me uncomfortable. I am transcending the, lifestory, that’s familiar, but not productive or growth oriented. I choose to transcend that, lifestory, and show up in my organization as my best self, that mindset contributes to organizational, wellness.

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Transform your Mind Stitcher

Rewrite your Lifestory by Going Back to Your Childhood Home

Myrna – I was listening an interview on Oprah Super Soul Conversations and the author talked about going back to your childhood home and looking through the window. What were your thoughts back then as a child when you looked through the window? Did you envy your friends because they had better clothes than you? Did you want to be white and have long straight hair? Looking through your childhood window allows you to understand your mindset and rewrite your, life story.

A lot of times you have to go back to the trauma and look at it from those eyes and maybe you will see something different. Looking back you could see something someone said to you that had traumatized you for years and now you see it was nothing.  The, story, that you been telling yourself for 30 or 40 years did not happen as you saw it.

How men can be vulnerable as Leaders

Vulnerability, for a guy is like being open to show your feelings even though you have told that real men don’t do this or that.  The things that society doesn’t let you talk about because you’ll look weak. Vulnerability, is like a beach ball in the ocean. Imagine you have a beach ball and it’s fully inflated and you’re trying to push it under water, it’s gonna to always pop back up. That’s like your trauma popping back up and you keep trying to push it back down.

That leads to self-sabotage and repeated destructive patterns.  The beach ball represents, vulnerability. If you open the tab and let some of the air out of the beach ball you will be able to keep it under water.  As a leader you have to become vulnerable to prevent self-sabotage.

Myrna – I remember Tyler Perry talking about this particular subject.  He was taught that men don’t cry and that he’s gone to funerals and people have told him don’t cry, you’re a man. But in an office nobody’s crying, what’s an example of, vulnerability, in a leader that showcases organizational, wellness?

Sam – In organizational, wellness, it is the action that you take to avoid the insecurity of fear. One of those insecurities could be something about like the President implemented a strategy that proved ineffective and someone else presented a better policy.  The President could fear loosing his job and being replaced.

 

Organizational Wellness and Your Life Story

Myrna – Tell us about your organization Five to Flow, I understand your mandate is to help foster, organizational wellness.  You identified that, health and wellness, is important to organizational success.

Sam – What we do at Five to Flow is we look at five areas of, organizational wellness:

  • On our website www.fivetoflow.com we have a, wellness, wave which is a diagnostic tool that anybody take and it will spit you back a score. There’s two versions, a short version and a long form version that any anybody in the organization can take. You get a score from one to five back on how all their employees answered questions in these five areas:
  • process,
  • people,
  • culture
  • analytics and
  • technology.

Each one of these areas has 25 questions for the long form and five questions for the short one about they’re employee or the leadership team or the CEO c-level, c-suite team about their experience of those five areas of the business.

 

Conclusion

I want to remind you guys if you’re if you’re listening on iTunes please subscribe.

You can also subscribe to the Transform your mind YouTube Channel.

Finally, I want to invite you guys to join my Facebook group called life coach for daily inspiration from Coaches and thought leaders from around the world.

 

Additional Resources

Are You Trapped By Your Past?

How to Find Beauty in Your Now!

Tragedy and Blessings Both Show up Suddenly

Mother wound healing

Tragedy, and, Blessings, both show up unexpectedly. We never know when it is the last time we will hug our loved ones, because tomorrow is not promised.  Your big break can happen today or your can break your leg today.

The scripture I want to reference today for my Preach the Word Worldwide Television Audience  is

Ecclesiastes 9:12 People can never predict when, hard times, might come. Like fish caught in a net or birds in a trap, people are caught by sudden, tragedy.

Listen to the full audio here:

Tragedy happen suddenly just like fish caught in a net

I want to share 2 stories with you today to illustrate this, life lesson.

Last month I took a trip back home to Toronto, Canada to see my new grandson.

My brother picked me up at the airport at 1 am. When we got to his house his wife and son were both up, so we stayed up and talked until 3 am before I went to bed. When I woke up in the morning everything had changed. Rose my brother’s wife received a call about 3.30 am that morning that her mom had a brain aneurysm. By 10.00 am that morning they knew that she was not going to recover. The blood vessel broke in her brain in a location that was inoperable. She died a few days later. That same night Rose had spoken to her mother at around 10 pm when she called and made arrangements to visit on the weekend. They ended the call with I love you. That was the last time they spoke.  Tragedy, never us a warning.

Like fish caught in a net people are caught by sudden, tragedy.

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The Polarity of the Universe

This is a Universe of polarity and the opposite of, tragedy, is, blessings. In my life fortunately I have had more, blessings, than, tragedy.

Let me share a personal story.

I live in an HOA community, Colony Trace HOA managed by Alliant Property Management Since I have 3 empty bedrooms in my home, I decided to rent one of them.

About 3 months after my tenant moved in, Alliant Property Management, sent me a notice telling me that I was in violation of the lease restriction.  No short-term rentals under 7 months are permitted in the community and asked me to provide a lease. I replied that a lease is not required for a roommate. I asked them if they were aware that I am living in my home. They responded by fining me $1000; but they did not stop there. I received an invoice along with a letter of intent to place a lien on my property from, Alliant Property Management, Attorney along with his bill for an extra $1000 in costs and charges.

Alliant Property Management is Corrupt

Alliant Property Management, has been terrorizing owners for a long time.  In 2014, I managed a property in the Promenade at the Forum in Fort Myers, Fl for an out of town owner.  Alliant Association Management, as they were called back then, before they changed their name to Alliant Property Management, took advantage of a Canadian Owner and sent fines for things like the garbage can being left outside, the garage door needed painting, the AC needed to be enclosed, pressure washing and everything they could think of.  They ignored the law requiring them to send 3 notices and allow owners a change to fix the problem before a fine is placed.

Instead they would send one registered letter to the tenant who obviously did not pick up certified mail that was not there’s.  They then placed a lien on the property and started foreclosure proceedings.  The owner paid over $15,000 in fines, legal fees to remove the foreclosure.

They then did the same thing again in 2018.  We had to sell the property at a loss in 2019 because we knew they would continue to rape us because they found a loophole in the system.  They never even sent out coupon booklets for dues.  It is like they couldn’t afford the stamp to Ontario, Canada.

 

Transform your mind PTWWN TV
PTWWN TV

The Tragedy of Race discriminations By Colony Trace HOA

I became incensed. My gift is words and I pride myself in my letter writing ability. The voices in my head were constantly feeding me info on what I should say in response to this injustice. My mind could not let it go. I was going to bed at 12 midnight and waking up at 2 am with thoughts of my response to this situation. I would have to get up and write in my journal to download so I could sleep.

Now I am a, life coach and I try to live my life consciously. I know that this negative energy was not good. I know that when we feel bad, we attract, tragedy, into your experience.

So I tried to practice awareness. I prayed, I paid attention to my breathe, I paid attention to sensations in my body to bring me into awareness. Nothing worked for long.  It was like trying to push an inflated beachball under water. It would keep pushing back to the surface. This negative energy affected my work, I became bored, had no interest in my work.

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iHeart Radio

Awareness helps to let your sun and Blessings flow into your life

I kept trying to catch my thoughts; but it seemed like the more I tried the faster they came back because  whatever you resist persists.

I finally got some relief when I did a chakra meditation and cleansed the energy circulating in my 7th Chakra.  Your chakra system is your energy ports of your body.  My negative energy regarding this situation was stuck.

You must take control of your energy body and keep it positive for your, blessings to come through.  Your energy body is like a magnet and like attracts like.  So if you have negative energy, it attracts more of the same.  When you have a negative aura, you cannot be creative. It is like the clouds blocking the sun.

God can’t bless you when your negative energy is blocking out his blessings.

A few days after taking control of my mind and my energy, I went into my Gmail account, which is not my primary inbox and these words almost jumped off the page at me. PTWWNTV is looking for life coaches and radio hostsIndeed.com sent me an email. They sent it twice!

My Blessings is a New TV Talk Show on the PTWWNTV

I dropped what I was doing immediately and investigated this. I am a life coach and a radio and podcast host!  I immediately updated my resume and applied for the job.

Two days later I have a TV program on The Preach the word worldwide network. My show premiered  March 21. My show airs every Sunday at 6 pm EST and locally on Comcast Channel 16.5 Atlanta.  The preach the word worldwide network is streamed into 50 million homes and can be found online at PTWWN.com, on Apple TV and   Amazon Fire TV 

I have always dreamed of hosting my own television show. Every time I upload a YouTube video, I try to activate the Law of Attraction; but never in wildest dreams did I imagine that I would attract, blessings, to spread the word of God.

The Blessings of Hope and Encouragement

My message is to offer Hope and encouragement by the renewing of your mind. Life is going to beat you down. People are going to hate you because of the color of your skin, because of your religion or just because your spirit clashes with theirs; but if you let it consume you it will keep you in a negative spiral and block your, blessings, of what God wants to do for you.

So, remember when you feel bad, you are attracting more of the same to you.  Try meditation, prayer, take a walk in nature anything to get you back into the present moment and watch God suddenly shower you with, blessings, you don’t have room to receive!

Conclusion Troubles and Blessings

Both Tragedy, hard times, and, trouble, show up suddenly. Life the Bible teaches like fish caught in a net, tragedy, shows up suddenly.

It could be you lost your job because of the pandemic and you have no money to eat or feed your kids.

I could by sudden illness like a stroke or heart attach and you have to live the rest of your life a  vegetable

Or it could be the, tragedy,  we most fear, the loss of a loved one.

The only thing we can do is to live every day like it’s your last and tell your loved ones you love them every time you talk to them because you never know when it will be the last time, you speak to them in this life.

Blessings also show up suddenly.  A casting agent can pick you out of a crowd and turn you into a star.  You could get the promotion you never expected, You could get a, TV talk show,  like me.

For Sponsorship opportunities on the, Transform Your Mind, TV Talk Show, click the link below for our sponsorship packages.

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