7 Ways to Live a More Meaningful Life

How to life a meaningful life

Whenever we are faced with our mortality, we look back and see if we have lived a, meaningful life. At the age of thirty-six, on the verge of completing a decade’s worth of training as a neurosurgeon, Paul Kalanithi was diagnosed with stage IV lung cancer and he reflected on the, meaning of life. One day he was a doctor treating the dying, and the next he was a patient struggling to understand the, meaning of life. And just like that, the future he and his wife had imagined evaporated. When Breath Becomes Air, chronicles Kalanithi’s transformation from a naïve medical student “possessed,” as he wrote, by the question of what, given that all organisms die, makes a virtuous and, meaningful life, into a neurosurgeon at Stanford working in the brain, the most critical place for human identity, and finally into a patient and new father confronting his own mortality and, life.

Washington Post: When Breath Becomes Air’: Young doctor’s last words of wisdom, hope

What is the, meaning of life? What makes life  worth living in the face of death? What do you do when the future, no longer a ladder toward your goals in life, flattens out into a perpetual present? What does it mean to have a child, to nurture a new life as another fades away? These are some of the questions Kalanithi wrestles with in this profoundly moving, exquisitely observed memoir.

Today on the Mindset Transformation radio show and podcast, I would like to take you on a journey into living!

How to live before you die

 7 Ways to live a virtuous and, meaningful life.

Psychologists says that in order to live a virtuous and, meaningful life, you should have balance in these 7 areas:

1. You should have A fulfilling career – i.e. You are doing what you love.
2. You should and must have a relationship with a higher power, God.
3. You must be fruitful and multiply.
4. You should offer Service to your community.
5. You must have effective time management and stress reduction.
6. You must get quality sleep, adequate exercise and proper nutrition.
7. You should spend quality time with loved one’s friends and family.

A Fulfilling career makes,  life,  meaningful 

Most people don’t do what they love, they work to live; so they live to work!
I saw a viral picture a few weeks back on Instagram that made me chuckle
It was a picture of a man crying with the caption:

Podbean

So how do you find your passion, work in your passion or work on your passion?

You have to Listen to your soul.

If you are dreading going to work, hate it all the time you are there, and you are not serving or making a difference in the lives of others, then quit. Working a job you hate does not allow for a, meaningful life.
Step out on faith.
Faith, now faith is the assurance of things hoped for and the conviction of things not seen.
Believe that God will fund your purpose, and if it is his will.

On the road to Damascus, Saul encountered Christ in a memorable experience that left him temporally blind. Immediately he started to undergo a major transformation of his whole life and character, including a total reorientation of his world view. Following this he was commissioned into service as an apostle to the Gentiles. Paul’s story highlights the 3 dynamics of a meaningful life.
The relational the, transformational, and the vocational. We must not choose one and neglect the others.

The relational experiences in a, meaningful life, results in openness to others, healing progress towards Christlikeness and participation in God’s purposes in the world.

The, Transformational, concerns how we transform after being touched by God and the Holy Spirit. Just as all Saul’s beliefs, mindset and values were altered, so can yours. This show’s mission is the offer you advice on how to do that.

The vocational is what we are talking about and it is how God works through us. I am doing God’s work.
He has given me the purpose of speaking life into you!

So, choose your vocation wisely and work as unto the Lord.

Know this for sure, that the quickest and most direct path to sickness and death is to linger in stressful situations. All diseases can be traced back to inflammation. Inflammation is brought on by stress and negative emotions.

Find your purpose and step out on faith.

As a coach, I can Help you design a plan to get there quicker.

A relationship with a higher power give you a, meaningful  life 

We are dual beings having both a physical and a nonphysical experience.

The most important barometer to living a meaningful and virtuous life is how your connect with source and if you understand why your soul chose this time to manifest into a physical being. i.e Understand what you are here to do!
When you meditate, you open communication with source energy and infinite intelligence.

This is the gateway, this is the path a, meaningful life.

When you are in communication with source, you get fed instructions to live a meaningful and virtuous life.
It is a 2 way communication; you ask and you receive.

So don’t stay in that job that is killing you, ask your source to direct you to the right job.
Listen for the instructions on how to do it the supernatural way, and not by your own limited powers.
I am telling you from personal experience, this works.
I receive instructions every morning either in bed before I rise, during meditation or sometimes later in the day. I act on my inspirations and they always produce fruit. And because I act on them,

I keep receiving more. If you don’t act on your gut instinct, your gut instincts will stop coming.
The bible teaches us not to do anything in your own strength! With God all things are possible.
Everything begins with our relationship with God and the improved quality of other relationships that develop out of this. In the intimacy of such a personal relationship, something of God’s own character gradually spills over into ours; it stimulates our, transformation. From our new awareness and knowing that God loves us, comes an increased confidence and boldness to face life’s challenges and opportunities. It motivates and empowers us to take more risks. It becomes the platform for a whole new approach to courageous and virtuous living.

God said “Be fruitful and multiply, and repopulate the earth”

Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord, the fruit of the womb a reward”
Can you truly have lived a, meaningful, and virtuous life if you have not multiplied yourself?
In the bible age, women who were barren were believed to be cursed.
In today’s age bearing a child is still considered one of the most rewarding and sought after experiences in life.
God hardwired unconditional love to the mother. A love that transforms hearts, an energy that is quantum, that means it can be felt over great distances just by thinking of your child.
I can tell you that the birth of my 2 children were the most, meaningful, things I did in my life. They are my reward, a gift that keeps on giving and giving.

The second question Dr Kalanitht asked as he faced his morality was:

“How do you nurture your child to live life, as yours fades away”

You see Dr Kalanitht and his wife decided to accept God’s plan for them to be fruitful and multiply.
They decided to leave a legacy behind, so they had a baby together.
The thought of leaving behind a child only increased the pain for Dr. Kalanitht.
We would all agree that leaving behind loved ones is the most painful part of death.

That is why we must live each day like it is your last.

You must impart all the love, knowledge and wisdom into your children when you are alive, so as they grow older, they would not depart from it and you will live on in their thoughts and hearts.

Be of Service to your community is another way to live a, meaningful life 

Your Success is in direct proportion to your service.
We must put the fuel in before we get heat.
No man can get rich by himself, unless he enriches the lives of others.
To lead you must first serve.
Your purpose in life will always include service to others.

Serving at the Ronald McDonald House

There’s a special connection that comes with preparing meals for others too heartbroken to cook for themselves. Making those dinners with a group of volunteers brings an intimacy and humility that cannot be matched. And one of the best spots I know to do that is at the Ronald McDonald House in Falls Church, Va., a place that offers comfort, refuge and care for families whose children are battling life-threatening illnesses.

Jarun Brown and Beverly Johnson prepare a meal at the Ronald McDonald House in Falls Church, Va.
Jarun Brown, 64, chops broccoli as we create a salad for 14 family members staying at the House. A social worker and former McDonald’s executive, she once “danced for a minute” with the Alvin Ailey Dance Company. Her previous corporate position earned her a seat on the Ronald McDonald House Charities (RMHC) board in Norfolk, Va., and she began volunteering with the Falls Church Ronald McDonald House six years ago.

“We do whatever is needed,” Brown says of the volunteers’ work. That could mean cooking a meal, cleaning the house, rotating refrigerated food or writing thank-you notes. Although volunteers and families don’t often stay in touch after leaving the House, Brown has kept in contact with a few families over the years. “It’s great to hear how our families are doing, and learn about the children’s recovery process,” she says. It makes their lives, meaningful.

Erin Petri, the evening manager, joins us. I give her an onion to chop and hope she doesn’t cry. A few minutes later another volunteer, Beverly Johnson, comes in. Volunteering with RMHC was on her bucket list after suffering the loss of a child years ago. A place like the Ronald McDonald House would have been helpful to her.
“I can relate [to what the families are experiencing] and that’s what makes it so special and so rewarding to me,” she says as she chops apples.
The families begin to enter the dining room. Several of them are drawn to the aroma of pineapple chicken simmering on the stovetop. We finish the broccoli salad and set it on the counter, next to the stove with the chicken and rice. It smells delicious and comforting, and we are happy that we have given these families what may be the only positive event for them that day.
Johnson offers to clean up, and I happily accept. “It is good therapy for me,” she says of her Ronald McDonald House work. “I think I’ve found my niche.”

Effective Time Management gives life, meaning. 

The key to a stress-free life is effective time management.
If you are always working in red zone of deadline you will experience burnout.
Effective time management is scheduling your day to work on top priority tasks before you work on C or D priority tasks.
When you do this, you will eliminate stress.
Effective time management also means that you plan your days to include the things that give life meaning. Walking in nature, exercise, reading, sitting quietly to reflect or meditate, spending quality time with loved ones, and proper rest.

Getting quality sleep, good nutrition, and exercise

Physical exercise releases endorphins, improves sleep, prevents diseases, releases stress, prevents dementia, prolongs life….
I could go on and on.
Everybody knows that exercise is good for your body, mind, and soul; yet few do it.

Since our topic today is When breathe becomes air: How to live a virtuous and, meaningful life.
I think everybody reading this would want to live a quality life. One that includes being healthy and independent.
The most effective way to ensure this is to get regular exercise, adequate nutrition and proper rest
In his book The Eat to Live Plan” John Fuhrman MD says, our body’s are designed for wellness. Give it the right biochemical environment for healing and it becomes a miraculous self-healing machine. When you eat mostly high-nutrient foods, the body ages slower and is armed to prevent and reverse many common illnesses, like diabetes.

The exercise prescription and a, meaningful life

Exercise is extremely important. Almost everyone can do something, even those who cannot walk can do arm, abdominal, and back exercises with light weights or use an arm cycle. Exercise will facilitate your weight loss and make you healthier. Vigorous exercise has a powerful effect on promoting longevity.

Spending quality time with loved ones gives, life, meaning 

In human affairs, there are efforts, and there are results.
The strength of the effort is the measure of the result. We know this to be a fact.
If you studied for your test, you will get a better grade.
If you make more sales calls, you will get more sales; if you spend quality time with your spouse, you will have a better marriage, if you spend quality time with your kids, they wouldn’t act out looking for attention.

Transform your Mind Stitcher
Transform your Mind Stitcher

Invest in your relationships.
Joel Osteen says that if you want your relationships to thrive, you must invest in them.
Be a giver rather than a taker. Strive to make deposits into the lives of your loved ones and other peoples lives. Encourage them, build them up, and help them to feel better about themselves.
One of the best advice I received on my wedding day, was to look at my marriage as a bank account. Don’t make withdrawals if I made no deposits”

Joel Osteen says the same thing.
Look at your relationships as an “emotional bank account” Every time you interact with loved ones or friends, you are either making a deposit or a withdrawal from your account.
You make deposits in the lives of your loved ones by giving them a hug and a kiss, telling them how much you love them, spending quality time with them, listening to them when they speak or being involved in the things they love like playing the piano, sports, painting etc.
We make withdrawals when we don’t take time for people, we don’t keep our commitments, when we don’t express appreciation. When we make more withdrawals than deposits our account becomes overdrawn.

The bible says in Ecclesiastes 5:3

The dream comes through much effort and the voice of a fool through many words.

Having a, meaningful, and virtuous life comes through much effort. You can’t just have the knowledge and don’t put it into action, you can’t just talk about wanting to live a, meaningful life, and not put the effort in.

Having a fulfilling career takes effort. You must learn the skills and then work hard to move up through the corporate ladder or building your own business.

Having a relationship with God takes the effort to find time to meditate and listen for instructions.

Being a good parent takes a lot of effort. Someone else is depending on you.

Being of service to your community takes supreme effort. Who has the time you ask? But something happens when you help the less fortunate. When you work at the soup kitchen and feed the hungry; you find your humanity. All your pedilly problems seems insignificant.

It takes effort to manage your time effectively, and not become reactionary.

It takes effort to make sure you are eating a balanced diet and taking supplements. It takes effort to get up early to exercise or do it after a long day. But if you want to live a long and meaningful life, you will do it.

If you found this content inspirational, be sure to share with your friends.
Please subscribe to my iTunes podcast “Transform your mind with coach Myrna”
Transform your mind podcast link

If you would like to be a guest on the Mindset Transformation radio show and podcast or a sponsor a show, email Coach Myrna at info@myhelps.us

Additional Resources

No Fear : How to Live with Courage

 

How to Lose Weight Without Dieting

Dr Nina Savelle-Rocklin says “It’s not about willpower” In her book  How to, lose weight, without, dieting,  Dr Nina says dieting leads to, eating disorders.

Dr Nina is also the author of “Food for Thought” a book about the treatment of,  eating disorders.

Lose weight without dieting
Book: Food for Thought

Our emotions feed our food intake. Our brain responds to emotions and feelings making it hard to, lose weight. Dr Nina is going to teach us today about how emotions affect our ability to, lose weight, and leads to, eating disorders.

In keeping with the format of my show, today my tip of the week looks at how positive emotions and negative emotions affect our daily lives.

Positive emotions or feelings can be likened to yeast in a loaf of bread. They raise your energy levels so that you can attract like thoughts floating around in the universe.

Thought impulses mixed with emotion are picked up quicker by infinite intelligence and acted upon.

7 Major emotions that helps to, Lose Weight

There are 7 major positive emotions:

  • Desire
  • Faith
  • Love
  • Sex
  • Enthusiasm
  • Romance
  • Hope
  • These are the most powerful emotions for creating wealth and happiness.

There are also 7 major negative emotions that lead to, eating disorders 

  • Fear
  • Jealousy
  • Hatred
  • Revenge
  • Greed
  • Superstition
  • Anger

Positive and negative emotions cannot occupy the mind at the same time. One or the other must dominate. You must make sure that positive emotions constitute the dominant emotions of your mind.

Form the habit of scanning your body to determine how you are feeling. If you find negativity immediately shift to a positive thought. With practice your positive emotions will dominate and negatives cannot enter in.

Negative emotions and feelings make you feel bad and makes us over eat, and impossible to, lose weight. Feeling bad is unnatural so we try to eat something, drink something, buy something or do something to make ourselves feel better. That is the source of addictive behaviors. You need to kill the ANTS. Automatic negative thoughts.
Check out my blog at blog.myhelps.us for more information on how to control your Automatic negative thoughts.

Guest Biography
Nina Savelle-Rocklin, Psy.D. is a psychoanalyst, author, speaker and internationally-recognized expert in weight, food and body image issues.

She has been featured in the Los Angeles Times, Prevention, Real Simple, Huffington Post and many other publications, and is a frequent guest speaker on podcasts, radio, summits and other events, including the prestigious National Meeting of the American Psychoanalytic Association.

Dr. Nina’s personal experience gives her a unique understanding of what it’s like to struggle – and she knows change is possible! She brings a fresh perspective by helping people understand “why” they turn to food instead of focusing on what they’re eating. In addition to her private practice, she writes an award-winning blog, Make Peace With Food, hosts a popular podcast, Win The Diet War with Dr. Nina, and offers “food for thought” on her video series, The Dr. Nina Show.

She has contributed to two psychoanalytic books, and her book “Food For Thought” on the treatment of eating disorders is to be published by Rowman & Littlefield later this year. Check out Dr Nina on the web at https://winthedietwar.com
Can you share your history and what led you to do this work?

Show Notes:

• Topic Discussion: It’s Not About Willpower! How To, Lose Weight,  Without, Dieting

• 2. Every year there’s a new fad diet – low carb, gluten free, Paleo. Why do you think, diets, don’t work?

• 3. What’s the best way to deal with food triggers that trigger, emotional eating?

• 4. What role does self-acceptance and self-esteem play in, weight loss?

• 5. For our listeners who want to make changes, what are some of the things they can do to create change?


• 6. A lot of people lose weight but gain it back, or they’re always in that yo-yo diet cycle. What causes people to sabotage their weight loss efforts?

How to Lose Weight Fast

  1. Eat a high protein breakfast.
  2. Avoid sugary drinks and fruit juice.
  3. Drink water before meals.
  4. Choose weight-loss-friendly foods.
  5. Eat soluble fiber.
  6. Drink coffee or tea.
  7. Base your diet on whole foods.
  8. Eat slowly.

Additional Resources 

https://blog.myhelps.us/motivate-yourself-with-patience-persistence-positivity/

Remember to subscribe to my channel to get notice of future life changing content.

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC8p2lfxF2GhOihRv8N3EZeA

How to Dream Big in the Quantum Matrix

How to Dream Big

The concept of, dream big, is to not let yourself become small. Not just react to what life’s dishing out. We need to, dream bigger, because the universe gives you exactly what we ask for.  If you ask for 50 cents instead of $1 you will get 50 cents.

https://www.iheart.com/podcast/269-Transform-your-Mind-29542107/

Introduction to, Dream Big

Ilona Selke, shares The concept of, dream big, is to not let yourself become small. Not just react to what life’s dishing out. Today on the Transform Your Mind with Coach Myrna podcast.  I am so excited to be talking to international best-selling author Ilona Selke. Ilona who is currently  travelling the USA directly from Bali where she spends seven months of a year.

So envious, Ilona is promoting her new book, “Dream Big, the Universe is Listening”.  We’re going to be talking about shifting your reality in the, quantum, matrix.  I meditate every morning and then I go walking and meditate some more while I listen to podcasts. This morning I was listening to the Hay House World Summit podcast and the guest was Dr. Bruce Lipton, he was teaching  us that, Quantum mechanics, or the, quantum, matrix is the foundation for all Sciences.

Chemistry and Biology sit on top of, Quantum mechanics. When I came back from my meditation, I put a note in my journal that I needed to read some more, quantum, matrix books. Then as I going over our show notes, I noticed that your book is about the, quantum mechanics,  and that we’re going to be talking about, quantum mechanics.  I look forward  to fast tracking my learning!

Ilona – Yep, the Universe is indeed listening, Bruce Lipton’s book title is “The Biology of Belief,” he talks about what he calls Epigenetics. I love the fact that he talked about the, Quantum Matrix. Someone was saying that we when we watched the movie The Matrix, that it looked like science fiction; but we could be in something similar to that in real life.

The subtitle of my book it’s called, Dream Big, the Universe is listening, I know we have all these religions across the world and no matter who they believe the right version of God is, there is only one source. Let’s just be honest, if there were multiple sources we’d have a war on our hands. Source multiplies itself and then humans interpret it differently.

Formulate your prayer if you want to pray or if you meditate your visualization in such a way that the universe can decode your message. The Universe has its own language and we don’t need to learn a computer language. Luckily we are endowed with a language, but most of us do it incorrectly. I want to help everybody do it in a way that the Universe will start listening.

Sponsorship Deals

https://myhelps.us/podcast-sponsorship-transform-your-mind/

Today’s episode is being sponsored by T.Y Waterproofing, serving the Atlanta area. T.Y Waterproofing has over 30 years’ experience in waterproofing and basement repairs. Let T.Y Waterproofing, waterproof your crawl spaces, slabs, remove and kill mold, install pumps and French drains. Call Timothy at (404)449-5467 for a free estimate.

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Ilona is an International Best-selling Author, seminar leader, lecturer, musician CEO and co-founder of Living from Vision. Ilona has inspired thousands of people worldwide to discover the power of their consciousness and to create successful lives. Ilona has written four books, produced music and meditation CDs, co-authored two books one with Brian Tracy, and one with Jack Canfield, she also has been a regular guest on A&E, Bravo TV with Jack Canfield, and a producer and TV show host for Quantum Living show on women’s broad broadcast TV.

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Why we should, Dream big

One of the things I set out to figure out was how to talk to the Universe.  I observed regularly is that whenever I said I don’t want something,  that’s what I got. Can you imagine, I was so delighted to figure out that I recognized one definite Law of the Universe, which was “I got what I didn’t want.” I’m gonna ask you to not think of a pink elephant.

Can you do that? I don’t think so. I want to know what is in your head right now? A pink elephant! I figured out the Universe. If I say I don’t want a bicycle for my Christmas gift, guess what the Universe is going to give me for Christmas? When I said I don’t want a bike, I visualized the bike and made me manifest it. I learned to, dream big.

I figured out the Universe has a law which is it gives me what I don’t want. Maybe God or the Universe has a different plan. I could say I want to be in that big castle, I can see myself in it. I should say something I really want. I want millions of listeners to my podcast. Let’s say millions of listeners, that’s what I want. All these people who are sitting on this planet listening. They are ignited they are excited.

There are others who are also listening right now, millions of them, they are listening and we are one. We are all vibrating together. It’s not just one here in the neighborhood, and one there, we are collectively globally. A large group of people and we are all building the new world. We are shifting the paradigm together and we are millions and we are listening and we are taking the lessons and making them real in our daily life to prove to ourselves and our family that this Universe is listening.

Dream Big
Dream Big

That this paradigm is really living. This is what I did when I was 10 years old. I just had to learn about changing that no factor, and then when I’m 14, I said okay I’m going to go teach the world to be creative, and so I always say when you do, make sure you always add that little sentence that says “for the highest good”

Here are three easy steps to,  dream Bigger:

  1. Describe it
  2. Imagine it,
  3. Feel it

Allow yourself five minutes, the luxury of being in your fulfillment. Five minutes, millions of people just see it. Five million listeners around the world. How would you feel right now if you had five million listeners?

Myrna – I would feel good. I would feel that I was given a mandate from God and I would protect that mandate by caring for my 5 million listener. I would make sure they are fed, inspiring messages every week and that my platform will contain good content. I have the intention that I want to reach the world before every recording.

I want to give you a little synopsis, Dream Big, the Universe is listening, and then we’re going to dive in little deeper in her book. Ilona takes you into a journey into the greater mystery of the universe, she takes you step by step, as she mentioned earlier through fascinating stories and how to manifest your goals and, dream big.

At the same time you, dream big, you create a better life for yourself.  In the planet we’re a living in a consciousness interactive universe. For you to become the master of your destiny, you need to dive into your subconscious mind and reach into your super consciousness. Ilona travels across the globe teaching other levels of consciousness.

She describes in easy-to-follow steps just how magical life really is when you learn to, dream bigger. After reading her book, you will come away inspired and equipped to make your dreams come true and create a better life for yourself on this planet. Check her out at  www.ilonaselke.com.

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What is the biggest lesson you think that readers can take from the concept of, dream big?

Ilona – The concept of, dream big, just itself, I’ve had people who just take the book and go oh my God I’ve let myself become small.  I’ve let myself just react to what life’s dishing out. All the demands and I’ve forgotten to, dream big,. I’ve forgotten to listen to my own self.  So sometimes just holding the book in their hands without opening a page they’ve gone to the place of, dreaming bigger.

I want to remember to take time for myself and to, dream big, again because maybe we had dreams of who and what we wanted to do, and then some of them got either fulfilled or not. We have kids and get stuck at home, or as a woman, do the providing job thing, and feel like we’re trapped in a rut. That’s when we need to take time and to, dream big, to think about what we want.

To listen to our soul, to our heart, and to step back out of the house. Buzz out of our life and to step back and to do what’s really meaningful to us. I said I’m going to give away a free app, that will guide people about God. Listeners can do this for 5 minutes every day, even if you just do that you start setting up a habit, where your soul and heart, your spirit will start saying thank you for listening to me.

It’ll start giving you nudges, it’ll start coordinating things for you. People will call you at the right time. I’ve had people who walk into a bookstore and my book literally fell into their lap. You put out the vibrational frequency, and anything that matches it, will come in.

I hate to admit it is that unfortunately the mass number of people are more interested in soap operas and dramas and disasters, rather than making their lives better by, dreaming big.

You don’t have to follow any religion. You can just simply tune into the universe, which I call the source, and start your own conversation. Start talking to god by sitting down and saying what you need. Set up a conversation with this higher power, God and then if you have a desire and wish and needs, a dream or something you want to contribute to the world, just ask for it.

Let’s say you need a certain amount of money every month, you may think hell, I need to be able to travel the world, I need to travel to other countries, I need to see other cultures to expand my horizon, that’s what I really want. The universe says, ok. If we catch ourselves saying well I really want to travel the world; but then in your heart you feel these I have responsibilities, I don’t want to leave, I’m afraid, maybe I get sick or whatever all your butts, they are the reasons why we stay where we are, stuck.

Because you’re giving conflicting information. You’re saying, yes I want it, but then you’re saying well no, I don’t want it because of that. Those little voices are usually not that loud, we feel them we try to ignore them, we try to say no, no I’m not really thinking that.

Dreaming Bigger in the Quantum Field

In my book, Dream Big, the Universe is Listening, I give techniques of how to deal with those little butts and snarling voices, or those tight feelings in the tummy, because they are at first blockages.  Later on that block becomes your stepping stone. I tell you I am teaching this technique to doctors, therapists, hypnotherapists, all over the world. A lot of them have taken it to substitute the other techniques they used to use, because this one really works.

Myrna – It definitely does. I like what you said about there’s just so many people that are interested in reality TV shows and sports and the news and things like that and don’t spend any time, dreaming big. I wrote my first book “Becoming Conscious, my Awakening, about four years ago and that’s basically when I started to understand synchro destiny and, Quantum matrix, and envision and all the things that you talk about. I’d be on that path and that’s one of the reasons my vision was to have this radio program and then podcast. I talked about transforming your mind because that’s where it starts.

Ilona – There are four different interpretation. One of them actually allows for the idea that we live in the universe that has parallel dimensions and parallel realities all at coexisting simultaneously. I train teachers and coaches, we have the course in Chinese we have students in China and Czechoslovakia in Germany in England and Spanish English Spanish, French, German, Czech, Chinese, and my books are out also in Hindi, and in Czechoslovakia and Russian, so we try to go worldwide.

All humans alike they don’t really well I mean they like to have an idea of how the universe works but the trick to creating a shift in the matrix of time-space is to slowly but surely build up your miracles, so that you really feel the universe is listening to you. Talk to it and you can transform your negative doubts and beliefs and pave the way for the beautiful expression of who you really are.

Scientists don’t even believe in God, but the quantum physicists say well there is something weird going on which implies that there is a greater intelligence at work. All of them right now are trying to develop a new worldview and quantum physics has lent itself the closest to different understanding. It’s a modern way of saying there is a God and there is the observer affect. The observer who is looking at the experiment is changing the outcome!

I actually published in the book with Jack Canfield, he’s the co-author of Chicken soup of the Soul, and the chapter about it is really about a Mind Bender, I described how I close my eyes and talk this mind-bending story through to God and I see the techniques are the same. You become clear on what you want you imagine what it would look like.

If it had already happened and you feel as if it had already happened, so in my body and bones I was sitting there not only visualizing being arriving on time and being in the end result. I’m not only applying myself, but I’m also feeling in my bones. It takes a lot of practice. I tell people is start small. I started creating parking lots and then build your way up build your confidence up.

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Is the Quantum Matrix real?

https://www.disclose.tv/you-are-living-inside-a-quantum-computer-program-the-matrix-is-real-308185

I definitely need some help. I’ve been working and working on this thing for a while and I’m a very I’m a deterring person. It’s hard for me to visualize. I can get the emotion and I can talk myself through it, but I want to see it in my mind.

I’ve got a trick for you. Here let’s do this, because a lot of people are in your shoes, they go I can’t visualize for anything. Some people are more kinesthetic types, maybe are one of them. I’m going to do a test for you and you’re probably going to come out with flying colors like everybody who’s listening.

How to Visualize and Dream Big

I would like you to visualize a tree as best as you can. Just a tree, an ordinary tree and move to one side of the tree, you’re going to put a red dog and on the other side of the tree is a blue dog. Now I want you to take your index finger that you like the best and point it to the red dog just point. Which side did you point? Right side, okay well honestly some people have the red dog on the right some people have it on the left. Now tell me when you say you can’t visualize, how come you knew that the red dog was on the right side of the tree?

I’m not seeing the dog. I can see the tree because I walk and see trees every day so I think I can visualize a tree, but I’m not seeing the red dog. I’m just imagining.

That works just as well because the most important aspect is the feeling. Imagine you’re sitting down and having lemonade, as a matter of fact somebody serves you the lemonade and a good lemon cut open to a quarter and really fresh. You decide to bite into that lemon. You take that wedge of lemon and you’re going to imagine you take it and you bite into it.

I’m tasting that sour, I’m not actually seeing it but I am like you can imagine thinking exactly. I imagine it in my mind. I’m a reader and I cry at movies and I cry when I see stuff. I cry when I read books, so I get myself in the picture. I want to see with my third eye and it’s not happening.
Let me ask you one question. Did you start salivating more when I asked you to bite into that lemon?

Yes I did.

Ilona – I’ve lived with a lot of imaginary stuff. I visualized and, dreamed big, every day. I work on it, in fact I did this course called the “wealth magnet” and every morning I sit down I imagine different success things like what my what my Rolls-Royce is going to feel like when I drive it and what my big house, over looking the mountains is going to feel like!

There are two things when we say visualizing, one means representing to yourself something that is not currently physically in front of you; but you can put yourself into. Two, if you can create and feel the feeling of already doing it. Now when you say I’m visualizing myself driving in a Rolls Royce you giggled I can tell you that is the part of you that says I don’t have it. I shouldn’t be thinking that or it’s funny.

You heard me talk about I want to have millions of listeners in order to do, I have to, dream big,.

Author interview Transform Your Mind Podcast
Author interview Transform Your Mind Podcast

Conclusion

Myrna – I would love for you all to review the podcast on iTunes. This encourages my guests and encourages other people to be able to listen to this life changing program. Ilona, so go ahead and tell them what the FREE GIFT is today for posting a review on iTunes.

Visit my website www.ilonaselke.com download the FREE app if you want to start your day with positive focus and be supported, I’ll do that for you for free. I’ll do that every morning with you. With my more meditative voice and with much more singsong in my voice. Also if you want to end your day on a good note come with me on this journey called “living from vision.” it’s called the “Living from Vision” light App. It’s available both on Google and Android. If you purchase my book, “Dream Big, the Universe is Listening” it will also give you the directions of how to get the App.

Dream Big, the Universe is Listening. This has been a very inspirational high-energy interview, we came out of the gate running like some racehorses. I loved it, we’re out of time right now but Ilona is going to be back next week and we are going to talk about “How to find it your Soulmate” so be sure to tune in for that because you don’t want to miss it.

Ilona – I’m going to share with you “How to have sex out-of-body” Wow, yes the men are going to come knocking now, women too! Well Ilona it has been an absolute pleasure. I definitely will go and not only get the free app but I’m also going to download your book, Dream Big, the universe is listening.

Thank you so much for spending the time with me today. For more information on Myrna Young, Life Coach visit me on the web at www.myrnayounghelps.com. I thank you listeners for tuning into www.wdjyfm.com, the Transform Your Mind with coach Myrna podcast, available on iTunes, Google Play, stitcher, and now on I Heart Radio, you can listen to it yet anywhere.
Until next time Namaste.

Additional resources:

 

The Secret to Having it All

How Does Emotional Intelligence Affect your Success In Life

Positive mindset

If you do not take control of your,  emotional intelligence, and thoughts, they will repeat in cycles. We have over 70,000 thoughts per day and 90% of these thoughts repeat over and over. That is why people get stuck in life, reliving the past like Groundhog day.

Jenny R. Craig, LCSW, BCD is a, transformation, specialist, utilizing her expertise in assisting leaders in creating authentic, profound, long-lasting impact in their organizations and personal lives.

Emotional intelligence, is important because, Strategic planning,  does not kick in until the mid-twenties.

Also any huge trauma changes the way the brain works.

As a, transformation, coach we give our clients tools and techniques that can move them through the darkness of being stuck in rewind, and into the light. The light is to find out your true purpose and discover who you really are.

Emotional Intelligence, allows you to do the mental work in living a purposeful life.

Here are four traits of Emotional Intelligence:

* Self Awareness: Knowing what we are feeling and why we are feeling this way.
* Self Management: Handling distressing emotions so that they don’t cripple you.
* Empathy: Knowing what someone else is feeling. Being capable of walking in another man’s shoes.
* Skilled Relationships: There is not a better barometer of, emotional intelligence, than the quality of one’s relationships. When you put the top three skills together, you will have quality and healthy relationships.

Transform your Mind Spotify Podcast
Download on Spotify

What is Emotional Intelligence

Emotional intelligence refers, to the ability to identify and manage one’s own, emotions, as well as the, emotions, of others.

Emotional intelligence, is generally said to include at least three skills:

  • emotional awareness,
  • the ability to identify and name one’s own, emotions
  • the ability to harness those, emotions, and apply them to tasks like thinking and problem solving
  • the ability to manage, emotions, which includes both regulating one’s own, emotions, when necessary and helping others to do the same.

There is no validated, emotional intelligence test.

Test for, emotional intelligence, looks for the general intelligence factor—and many argue that, emotional intelligence, is therefore not an actual construct, but a way of describing interpersonal skills that go by other names.

Despite this criticism, the concept of, emotional intelligence, sometimes referred to as emotional quotient or EQ—has gained wide acceptance. In recent years, some employers have even incorporated, emotional intelligence tests, into their application and interview processes, on the theory that someone high in, emotional intelligence, would make a better leader or coworker.

Soundcloud Transform your mind podcast
Transform your Mind Soundcloud podcast

Conclusion Emotional Intelligence

I am grateful that you have tuned into this podcast from all around the world. I believe that the spirit of God has attracted you here so that you can receive the insights, revelations and knowledge revealed on this broadcast. Whatever you need for this day in your life you will receive. I can truly say that your life will never be the same because a brain that has been expanded with knowledge can never return to it’s original size. I invite you to subscribe to this podcast so that you will receive new podcasts every week with more insights, revelations and knowledge so that you can live your best life now.

Visit me on the web at www.myrnayounghelps.com and sign up for a free strategy session.

Additional Resources 

How to Apply, the Law of Divine Oneness, to your Life

How to Find Happiness After a Tough Year

Pursuit of Happiness

 

How to find happiness, after a tough year, your circumstances could be bad. You could have gotten a divorce, you could have lost a job, you could have lost a loved one.  Can you find, happiness, after a loss? In the, pursuit of happiness, guru’s teach that, happiness, could only be found on the inside, so we can be happy regardless of losing a loved one, losing our job, a sickness, or divorce.

But the question is portable because we can add anything after the, How to find happiness,  after….! We can add, How to find happiness, after my kids leave home, or, how to find happiness, after someone close to me dies, or, how to find happiness, after I lose my job etc..
We can substitute any phrase.

Happiness, comes from the inside.

The Pursuit of Happiness

Happiness,   is the universal goal of everyone who has breathe.

Let’s look first at the relationship you have with yourself.
Self-love is so important to, happiness.
You have to try very hard to love yourself. If you can’t love yourself no one else can love you.
If you can’t love yourself you can never be happy.
You can start by finding one thing about you, that you love.

God knew what he was doing when he created you. Everyone has at least one thing that makes them stand out.
Find it and give it love every time you look into the mirror.
And if there is something you can change, Change it. If you can’t change it, find a different perspective on it and learn to love it.
You can change your weight, your hair color, your teeth, your wardrobe.
You can’t change your height, your skin color, your sex!
There is no sense whatsoever about being unhappy about something you can’t change about yourself or about something you can change; but won’t.

Transform Your Mind iHeart Radio
iHeart Radio

How to be Happy

I just saw one of the most inspiring movies of the decade. Hidden Figures.
As a coach, this movie had so many nuggets.
1. The women were ambitious and they took control of their lives. They did not sit around and blame their skin color.
In one scene, one of the women was bitching that in order to get a promotion she had to upgrade her education.
The problem was that the only school she could do this at was an a white’s only school. So what did she do?
She petitioned the court to change the school to an integrated school. She researched and presented her case to the judge with such passion that the judge had no choice but to grant her the motion.

In another scene, IBM computers were going to make the woman computers obsolete, so the leader of the group took it on herself to learn how to program the computer. She had to steal the programming book from the white’s only library because the colored library had no such books! That is the, pursuit of happiness, working towards a goal.

There is always something you can do to improve your circumstance.

You are either part of the solution or you are part of the problem.

I covered the other 2 ways to find, happiness, in the video.
2. Your relationship with those closest to you.
3 And your relationship with God.

As you can see relationship is key!
We are social beings, we need connection, even if it is with one person.

Transform your Mind Stitcher
Transform your Mind Stitcher

How to find happiness in life

I would like to end this post with this story.
I was searching the internet for a story on, Happiness, and I came across this movie called Finding Happiness by Yogi Swami Kriyananda..
Yogi Swami has Ananda colonies all over the world where people live in harmony and higher consciousness in nature.
Ananda means true joy is within.

Yogi Swami choose to build his colonies in nature because being in the presence of beauty is important to uplifting consciousness.
As you all know the East teaches the importance of meditation.
Meditation allows you to find your sense of security inside, it allows you to find your sense of self inside and when you find these things inside of you, you can never lose it because no one can ever take it away.
The Ananda colonies teaches that if you live to be happy, you will find things that make you happy and the number one thing that makes us happy is selfless service to others.

I also added a bonus audio on “How to control your thoughts”
As you know that, happiness, comes not from what people do to you or your circumstances but how you think about it.
So your internal dialog and your thoughts must be controlled and channeled into positivity and gratitude for you to find, happiness.
I urge you to find all the things that make you happy, and do them.

Find the things that make you happy, make it a necessity to be in nature at least once per week!
I guarantee..
You will not only find, happiness, but you find your bliss!
Namaste

Additional Resources

 

How to be Happy: The Happiness Formula

5 Ways Millennials Can Stimulate Personal Development

Personal Development Millennials

Millennials, need parents teaches or coaches to stimulate their, personal development.  Millennials,  need to understand that, personal development, comes when they anticipate the very next phase beyond the one there’re in, so they can be prepared for it when it arrives.

Introduction to, Personal Development for, Millennials

Today what we want to focus on is giving, Millennials, some clarity on, personal growth and development. We both know that learning should not stop when we leave school. My guest today is Arika Pierce author of the book The Millennial’s Playbook to Adulting. 

Myrna – What advice would you give, Millennials, on, personal growth? Millennials, are in the growth stage of life, what advice would you give them? I know in your book you give ten tips. We don’t have time to talk on all  ten, personal development, tips; but pick some of the top ones and share how you would advise, Millennials, on, personal growth and development.

Soundcloud Transform your mind podcast
Transform your Mind Soundcloud podcast

Arika- I think especially after you get out of school, Millennials, are sort of over trying to learn from textbooks.  People are just exhausted from that textbook and learning from your professors and things like that; So I do encourage, Millennials, to become students of life.

By that I mean opening your eyes to all the things that you can learn from different people, new experiences just being open to continuing to stretch your horizon and to be multifaceted and to be just a well-rounded person. In my book, for example:

  • I suggest things such as reading biographies about people that you’re curious about for, personal development, or maybe who you want to know. Learn more about their path.
  • I also believe that you should do things like watch documentaries on Netflix about different types of topics that you might be interested in or just want to know more about.
  • I also think listening to podcasts that’s huge for, personal development,  and  that’s why I love your podcast. I listen to podcast really throughout my day on various types of topics, it could be something around, personal development, by expanding your mindset, it could be something around the news, it could be anything. There’s so much out there that you can really stretch your mind and learn.
  • Going to different types of events. I always tell people if you get invited, go to something and especially if it’s something that you probably would be interested in doing. Go to the Opera, go to a hockey game even though you don’t know what’s going on, go to a book talk, go to a wine tasting, whatever it is just expand your horizon and, personal development.
  • Learning does not stop once you walk across the stage. You should always every day be learning more about yourself, about life, about other people, just always be curious and be a student of the world and of life.
Transform your Mind Spotify Podcast
Download on Spotify

Myrna – Awesome, that’s some good advice I love the podcast one because that’s a big one. I actually showed my mom just yesterday how to put podcasts on her phone.

That’s the space that we’re in right now. I will tell you I started listening to podcast just to learn what some of the successful podcasters are doing. If there’s something you want to learn, you go to an event, you go to book signing. That’s why people write books. You can take ten years to learn something or you can take ten minutes to read how someone else did it in a book, and that’s the purpose of books.

I wanted to learn how to be better at what I do, so I started listening to podcast.  You would not believe how my mind has been expanded. I subscribe to TuneIn radio, so that I can research how that works and what Hot Talk radio was all about. I happened to come across the Hay House World Summit podcast and you would not believe what I’ve been learning.

I listen to podcasts every morning when I walk. I walk for an hour every day, so I that’s my learning time and I my eyes are wide open because this podcast have guest speakers all the top people in the spirituality and consciousness and health space.

I try to bring good content on this show so that people can plug in and hear something inspiring and mindset shifting. This podcast is not all about shooting the breeze. I went through your book and I made a note of some of the things that you mentioned and I’ll mention a couple of them because it’s very important you talked about:

How to Transform your Career with Purpose

How Millennials can Shift their mindset for, personal development

• Keeping your mind healthy. You start off by talking about depression. Depression is very big right now. I don’t know where it’s coming from, but a lot of people are depressed, even the ones that you think should be happy, that has a lot of money. Still trouble with depression. You start out by saying, keep your mind healthy and that’s very important when you talk about staying motivated.
• Find a healthy outlet. Journaling, painting, baking, etc and stuff like that that keeps your mind healthy. I talked about journaling, I think it’s great but it’s not for everybody. I think you know it’s not something some people can do it every single day, some people just do it on a periodic basis. I believe don’t be hard on yourself about doing it, but if sometimes you need a place to get your thoughts get your feelings out thinking on paper can honestly be a great way to do that.
• Getting into healthy routines. I just wrote a blog that’s coming out next week about a morning routine. I think establishing a morning routine is a great, personal development, tool and can help you set the intention and tone for the rest of your day and so actually think sitting down and thinking about what you want your routine to be and doing it that could be transformative. I’ve just recently sort of created a new morning routine and it really has changed my mindset for the whole day. Just making sure there are these five or six things that I do before I start my day.

That’s awesome, you know again as you talk my mind goes to certain things and I was just listening to a podcast where Barbara Corrigan was speaking and we all know her from Shark Tank. She has done a lot for herself, she said something that I did as a little variation for what you just said. She said write down the things that you like to do and write down the things you don’t like to do and instead of trying to do the things you don’t like to do, and then find an assistant or an intern and delegate the things you don’t like to do.

If you’re still trying to just figure out what direction you want to go in life, I think that’s a great time to get it to get a, Life coach. Honestly I think the hardest part is just identifying what exactly you need the, Life coach, for sometimes you want the, Life coach, to help you with your, personal development plan, in terms of where you want to take your career.

Sometimes it could be helping you balance your work versus your personal life. You might need a, Life coach just in terms of helping you get to the next level of your dreams and, self improvement. There’s all different types of ways you can leverage and use a, Life coach. I really think that it’s never too soon to do that.

15 Benefits of Hiring an Executive Coach

Today, there’s lots of, Life coaches who focus on the, millennial, generation, which I think is great. I think those people really understand what the, millennials, are going through and can really help them work through all of those challenges. I wasn’t focused on the, millennial, generation until I recognized that my daughter being a, millennial, and her struggles and the things that she needs help with and then I put them two and two together.

I thought what there’s lots of people in that bucket that could do maybe good guidance and direction. Yeah so you’re right, I haven’t come across a lot of, millennial, coaches; but I know that, Millennials, are the generation that’s moving the bucket in a lot of areas. That’s because they’re a large group, they’re the movers and the shakers.

So as we continue our discussion on, personal development, as a, millennial, I want to ask this question. In your book Arika, you give advice on how to care for your body so how can we incorporate caring for your body with, personal growth and development?

Transform Your Mind iHeart Radio
iHeart Radio

Personal Growth and Development as a Millennial

I believe that when you work on your mind, when you strengthen your mind, a lot of that has to also be your body and soul, they’re all connected. When you are taking care of yourself when you’re eating right, when you’re exercising, I believe your mind is just in a different place. You feel those endorphins, everything is flowing. I had a workout this morning where I came up with three different things while I was working out that I wanted to incorporate.

When you feel good you just can really, transform your mindset, in a very positive way. I believe that when you are you believe that you’re invincible, and start taking care of yourself, eating right, making sure you’re drinking enough water, making sure that you know you’re working out on a regular basis, making sure you’re meditating, when all of those are aligned I believe that your life in terms of what you want to do, in terms of having the energy to do them, all falls into a, personal development plan. You get into the, personal growth and development, space. But you can’t take your body for granted, because we actually only get one and you know if your body isn’t right usually everything else isn’t right either.

That’s awesome, I was listening I was listening to Louise Hay, she was talking about something that she calls the mirror work. She says is that women especially should go in front of the
mirror every day when they wake up, when they look their worst and they should say to themselves, “ I love you, you are so awesome.” I have no problem with self-love, I love myself, but I still do it every morning. I look myself in the eye and I say “I love you you’re awesome.” What she’s trying to do with that little exercise is bring exactly what you’re talking about the mind-body connection. Millennials, have a problem with self love.

Millennials, and Self Love

When you love the body that you’re in, when you love you, then it transcends into every area of your life, it transcends into your, self confidence, it transcends into what you put in your body, how you treat it, how you let people treat you. There’s definitely a correlation with exercise into listening and connecting to your higher self. I wrote my entire first book and it was called ironically “Becoming Conscious, my Awakening” be connecting with my higher self.

I would go for run in the morning and all the words would come to me.  I would go to the car right after and start writing. I will tell you if I tried if I tried to circumvent and write at night or something it wouldn’t go as smooth, because then I’ll be trying to force it, but when it just comes to me it came to me when I was running, the words just flowed.

Like when you were exercising this morning. So the mind-body connection is very important, and that’s why I decided to include it in our topic today, because a lot of people do not care for their body and especially when they’re young, millennials, and they don’t have any aches and pains, they kind of ignore it.

I was listening to another podcast just yesterday again on the Hay House World Summit and listened to Ocean Robbins, I love his name, I told my daughter she has to name my grandchild Ocean. He is actually is the grandson of Baskin Robbins and he had an incredible story about how his grandfather ate ice cream all day long, he had at least 21 flavors in his fridge at all times.

He ate ice cream for breakfast and lunch! When he got to 70 years old, he had all these health problems because of the diet that he had all his life. He had heart problems but his story ended well, because started eating well, he started doing certain things, eating well, including cutting out ice cream and he was still able to turn it around. That’s not an encouragement for anybody listening to wait until they’re in their 70’s and in poor health to get started on a, personal development plan, for a healthy lifestyle, but do it now.

How, Millennials,  develop a, Personal Development Plan: Jim Rohn

Most, Millennials, are in school, I think a lot of, Millennials, go on to higher education. They’re working on feeding their mind and, personal growth, education and career and things like that. The reason I talked about, personal growth, because as a, Life coach, I know that there’s a difference. Jim Rohn’s personal development growth plan, is a popular, personal development plan.  Tony Robbins talks about Jim Rohn’s growth plan in his back story. I would like to hear your spin on the difference between studying for a career and actually, personal growth.

Arika – When we think about, personal growth and development, as you just said that that’s very connected to what you are focused on career-wise, your job. I think when you start to think about what you want to personally achieve for yourself, that may or may not be connected to your professional life, because there definitely is some overlap between the two.

I think really people just have to always think about looking inside and how do they define themselves, outside of their career. Millennials,  you’re thinking about how you want to define yourself as a person and defining yourself as a person is not just what your career is and so it’s very easy to get into a life pattern.  You only focus and your own the only thing that you know to that you gravitate to in terms of your growth, in terms of your brand.

When you ask “What is your, personal development plan” which is now something I heard from Brian Tracy he talks about you know spending all his money when he was a youngster to purchase something that called a, personal growth, plan. If I was to ask a, Millennial, they might answer in terms of there career trajectory. But that is not a, personal development, plan because it’s only it is only touching on one area of a multi-faceted spiritual being.

Deepak Chopra is one of the people that I follow and I love, he talks about asking “who are you?” who is the person that’s doing the listening right now? You ask yourself these questions “Who am I?” “What am I here to do?” You just ask God that question and even let God answer. Your, personal development plan links up to your purpose.

Transform Your Mind Personal Development podcast.

Conclusion

Learn different ways you can develop your, personal development, business, organization and, personal growth, skills.
Strategies for, personal development, can be found on the Transform Your Mind Podcast.

 

7 Strategies to Personal Growth

Do you have the, mindset, to scale the personal mountains in your life and get to, personal growth? In this episode of 5 mins with, Coach Myrna, I share 7 tips to acquiring the mindset of an, mount Everest, climber.

The mindset of a, Mount Everest, mountain climber? How to tackle your personal mountains.

Climbing Mount Everest

Not sure why but I picked up the book, “Into Thin Air, my expedition to the top of the world,” maybe it was because one of my goals was to hike the Himalayas, not climb, Mount Everest.  Let’s be clear! but after reading this book I was amazed by what, mindsets, could accomplish.

The, positive mindset, can elevate your life and make you stretch yourself, while its opposite a negative mindset can anchor you wherever you are.

Download on iTunes

The Mindset of a Mount Everest Climber

As an, Everest, mountain climber,  you are aware that your odds of dying is high. Even if you don’t die, your chances of frost bite or other dangers increase with every feet closer to the summit! The thin air can make you lose brain cells, lack of oxygen to your brain can give you brain damage. YET! The writer says that The line of, mount Everest, climbers attempting to get to the top, looks like the line at Walt Disney world. I wonder how these, mount Everest, climbers deal with their, personal mountains, or, personal growth.

What, mindset, do you have to develop to pay the $65,000 fee, risk your life, and push yourself beyond your limits to summit,  Mount Everest?

I discovered these 7 characteristics of people who climb their, personal mountains, personal growth,  and become, Mount Everest, mountain climbers:

7 Characteristics  of Personal Growth

1. Strong Mindset – Think of the, mindset, you have to have, to WANT to climb, Mount Everest, the top of the world 29, 035 feet in the sky! Let’s put that into perspective that the height that airplanes fly at! Hopefully your, personal mountains, don’t seem of this magnitude!

2. They want to test their limits– After reading “Into Thin Air” I listened to a Ted talk by Lori Schneider. She was diagnosed with Multiple sclerosis, and decided to make a goal of scaling the highest peaks on each continent before her MS progressed and she lost the use of her legs. She accomplished this feat and became the first woman with multiple sclerosis to summit,  Mount Everest. That was her, personal mountain, or, personal growth  and she climbed it and won.

Stitcher

 

3. They faced their fears – When you face your fears, especially the ones that tell you, you are not good enough, doing something super human sure proves that you are indeed good enough and wipes out fear forever more! Fear is false evidence appearing real. It is a bully and when you stand up to it, it always runs away. You have to remove fear to climb any of your, personal mountains,

TuneIn Radio

4. They are both mentally and physically strong – Climbing your, personal mountains, is both a mental and physical challenge. Climbing your, personal mountains, has nothing to do with physical strength. In the book “Into Thin Air” one of the climbers that reached the peak was a 95 lb woman. Mental strength is more powerful than physical strength.

5. Perseverance – Climbing high altitude mountains is a marathon not a sprint. You have to acclimatize yourself to the high altitudes by climbing to incremental altitudes and climbing back down several times. In the same way you can’t scale your, personal mountains, in one jump, you have to approach it like a mountaineer or a marathon runner, take small bites at a time. Start with the small, personal mountains, and work to way the top of the world Mount Everest 29, 035 feet above the earth!

6. A Growth mindset – The climbers who summited Mt Everest saw Challenges as an opportunity to grow and develop. There is an old saying “What doesn’t kill you, makes you stronger” Look at your, personal mountains, as a way to grow.

7. Willingness to be uncomfortable – There is no growth or victory until you get out if your comfort zone. The hardship a climber experiences on a climb is chilling. No pun intended. Climbing your, personal mountains, will definitely get you out of your comfort zone or it is not a mountain!

What can we learn from them? We learn that where there is a will, there is a way. All obstacles can be called, personal mountains, you have to climb them all one step at a time, carrying a heavy load, with frozen limbs, totally exhausted by the effort of just putting one foot in front of the other and when you finally reach the top, you have to still get back down!

If ordinary people can do it, you can climb your, personal mountains, as well. Live your dreams and dream big, really big.

Imagine being diagnosed with Multiple sclerosis and deciding to climb to the top of Mt Everest with no previous experience!

Believe in the unbelievable!
Climb beyond your limits, it is all a matter of Mind over Matter

If you have a friend that needs encouragement, feel free to share this episode and remember to subscribe and post a review.

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Additional Resources
Howe Committed Are You? – 4 Steps For Climbing Your Personal Mountains
https://www.finerminds.com/mind-power/personal-mountains/
How to Face a Challenge With Confidence
https://chopra.com/articles/how-to-face-a-challenge-with-confidence
https://blog.myhelps.us/the-quest-for-purpose-six-holistic-ways-finding-purpose/
https://blog.myhelps.us/the-alchemy-of-desire/https://blog.myhelps.us/the-alchemy-of-desire/

How to Create Positive Core Beliefs

How to Change Core Beliefs

 

Do you know that your, core beliefs, affect everything you do in life? Well it’s true.  What you believe is how you show up in every circumstance in your life.

Listen to full interview here: 

For example: Do you consistently find yourself in situations where men are trying to bully you or treat you less than you are worth? It may because of a, core belief, that started with how your father treated your mother or even you.

Introduction Core Beliefs 

Your, core belief, could be that you are a victim and that belief keeps you trapped in that story.

The thing about a, core belief, is that it cannot be easily changed.

Here is a quote from Tony Robbins that explains the power of, core beliefs,:

“All personal breakthroughs begin with a change in, core beliefs. So how do we change? The most effective way is to get your brain to associate massive pain to the old belief. You must feel deep in your gut that not only has this, core belief cost you pain in the past, but it’s costing you in the present and, ultimately, can only bring you pain in the future. Then you must associate tremendous pleasure to the idea of adopting a new, empowering belief.”

Soundcloud Transform your mind podcast
Transform your Mind Soundcloud podcast

We all have existing, core beliefs, in four areas:

  • How we feel love,
  • our self-worth,
  • how we feel security, and
  • fulfillment.
  • Life after death. 

Your, core beliefs, can’t be changed simply by throwing out an old one and adopting a new one, like changing your wardrobe. The change must come at the level of self-awareness to help you achieve any goal. 

Examples of, Positive Core Beliefs 

A, positive core belief, is pure and direct. It gives you a clear sense of who you are. It isn’t confused, conflicted, or compromised. Let’s take steps to make this the kind of, core belief, you are activating. Step one is to bring your, core beliefs, into awareness. The four key beliefs you want to activate are:

  • I am loving and lovable.
  • I am worthy.
  • I am safe and trusting.
  • I am fulfilled and whole.

The bible teaches that for God to answer prayer you must first believe and have faith that God is first able and willing to give you the desires of your heart; but there are ways to improve the chances that God will answer your prayer. A prayer is a special kind of intention or, core belief.  Therefore, the rules that apply to the,  Power of intentions, which are rules about consciousness, apply.

Your prayer will be answered, or not, depending on events happening out of sight – but not out of mind. The mind furnishes the mechanics of making any intention come true. An intention or prayer request, sent to God needs faith to rocket it to the heavens. An intention to graduate at the top of your class or to marry the man of your dreams takes focus, diligence and action. The bible also teaches “Faith  Without Works Is Dead”.

Are you rejecting love because of your, core belief? 

If you have not found love even after several tries, then you have to look deeply at what you are doing to push love away.  Do you have a, core belief, that you are unlovable? How much pain is that belief causing you? It will take a lot of work; but you have to believe that God’s light shines in you and that you deserving of love and happiness.

Do you feel empty inside all the time even though you have all the outward symbols of success like a nice home, a loving husband, a good job, 2 kids and a dog? Then your, core belief, could be that you need to make a contribution to the world like Mother Theresa or like Nelson Mandela to feel fulfilled. You have to change that, core belief, that maybe your purpose is to support your children and help them to fulfill their purpose in the world.  Sometimes our role in God’s kingdom is not to change the world but to change one person!

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Here is A Self-Awareness Exercise to help you understand Your, Core Beliefs,

Look upon what’s happening now in your life as a reflection of your, core beliefs.

Are there any patterns you see? For example:

  • Do all your relationships fail?
  • Are you in constant debt?
  • Do you find it hard to keep friends?

Listen to yourself. Once you figure it out, then turn it around. Ask yourself:

  • What do I want?
  • What would I have to believe in order to have this?

Next, you’re going to re-program yourself.

You may need the help of a coach like, Myrna Young, or mentor but; self-awareness is the key to changing your, core beliefs,

Transform Your Mind iHeart Radio
iHeart Radio

As Tony Robbins says, you must associate tremendous pleasure to your new, core belief,  For example. See yourself in a loving and fulfilling relationship, going on dream vacations and having a wonderful life together and believe that you are a woman any man can love!

Additional resources:

https://positivepsychologyprogram.com/challenging-automatic-thoughts-positive-thoughts-worksheets/

Our Cognitive Bias: Construction Of The Self-Concept

Self-concept refers to how one perceives themselves, their past experiences, their abilities, their prospects for the future, and any other aspect of the self. Aaron Beck’s cognitive triad, discussed below, deals with self-concept and the construction of the self. The basic idea of how our self-concepts and cognitive biases affect our lives has to do with automatic thoughts.

For example, someone with a negative “self-referential schema” is more likely to take things personally, leading to automatic thoughts like “People are not talking to me because I am an unlikable person”, rather than exploring other possibilities (Disner et al., 2017). A negative self-referential schema can also lead to increased severity of depression symptoms. Most importantly, a negative self-concept can lead to an unending cycle of negative thoughts.

This is because people with negative self-referential schemas exhibit an attentional bias. For example, when asked to decide whether an adjective is self-referential or not, people with depression are more likely to endorse negative adjectives than healthy controls, and they show an attentional bias by being quicker to endorse negative adjectives and quicker to reject positive adjectives than healthy controls (Disner et al., 2017). In turn, being likelier to endorse negative adjectives is correlated with longer “retrospectively reported” depressive episodes, demonstrating the cycle of negativity.

How Black Fathers Can replace the Absentee Dad Myth

Black Fathers be Visible to your children

Black Fathers, are so valuable, we are so important.  We have to take care of ourselves, we have to get over this idea of stepping back or I can’t deal with this and be there for our black families.

Carl Stokes Jr. is an author, keynote speaker, professor and social worker and author of the  brand new book  “A Straightforward Guide for Black Fathers to Improve Themselves and their Relationships with their Children”  So this post is about Fatherhood, and the Issue of, Black Fathers, because in the black community we have the label of the, black fathers,  are usually, absentee Dads.

Listen to the full interview here:

Introduction Why Black Fathers need to be visible

Dr Carl decided to write this book and mentor, black fathers, because it is something that the black community needs to get better at.  Carl Stokes Jr. is an award-winning social worker, educator, college instructor and recently received his doctorate in education. His dissertation focuses on, Black Fathers, and their perseverance in community colleges. Dr Carl is passionate about working to uplift the black community.   He also enjoys teaching, parenting classes, for a small non-profit organization.

Myrna – As a black man tell us your story of your relationship with your, father, and your current relationships with your daughters. I’m curious to know, because a lot of times we work on areas that we have lived through.

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Dr Carl – What’s interesting is that my answer is both. I grew up with my, black father, and without my, black father.   My dad was in the home until I was about 10 or 11 years old, unfortunately though during that time he had fallen victim to the crack cocaine epidemic of the 80s. So my, father, was in a home; but life was very difficult during that time; because of what he was going through.

However, he was still in the home, there was still benefits of his presence. Then things got really bad to the point where we were basically forced out.  I went through that whole period of teenage years and everything without guidance of my, father.  So, as an adult, I can see the difference between an, absentee dad, and a, Black father, in the home.  Because even though my, father,  wasn’t at his best, when he was in the home I benefited form him being visible.

Why Black Fathers should be visible to their kids

Myrna – So between the ages of 1 and 10 your dad was in the home; but he even though he couldn’t be a, father, because he was under the influence of crack cocaine, what you are saying is that the fact your, father, was in the home; it had some positive effect on you.

Dr Carl – Absolutely! Discipline wise, teaching me how to protect and take care of my mother, because he was gone a lot.  He would have conversations with me. It was nice having a, father, to talk to. It was a benefit to me and my younger brother.

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Transform your Mind Spotify Podcast
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I can sit here and say that I did get lessons from having that male presence in the house. I can also say I also experienced domestic violence and theft. I also experienced run-ins with the police and people from the street and all that. I wouldn’t say stick it out regardless, because I just as easily could have went the other way. I was just fortunate enough to take the more positive path.

Why is being a visible Black Father is Important

Myrna – Let’s transition to your relationship with your daughters. You have three daughters. How do you parent them knowing that you didn’t have a, father, since you were 10 years old?

Dr Carl – Okay, this is where it gets a little bit interesting and sort of complicated, because I became a, black father, at 17 years old. I was a senior in high school, unfortunately because I was so young and because I didn’t have the guidance and I was immature, I ended up not handling my, parenting, as a, Black father, the way I should have. My daughter’s mother decided to move to Atlanta Georgia and take my daughter with her.

I didn’t know I had rights. I didn’t know that I shouldn’t have allowed her to take my daughter without working out any arrangements. The separation caused damage to the relationship between me and my first daughter. When I became a, Black Father, to my other two daughters, I vowed that nothing was going to stop me from being a good dad. Fatherhood, became my absolute top priority.

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Transform your Mind Soundcloud podcast

Replacing the Absentee Black Father Myth

Myrna – Why is it that traditionally, black fathers, have been absent? We know we’ve got the crack epidemic, we know we’ve got prison; but even when none of those circumstances are present, black fathers, still don’t make it a priority to parent their children. Why do you think that is the situation?

Dr Carl – We kind of lowered our own expectations as, Black dads. We have very little guidance and then when we put the other things in a mix;

  • incarceration,
  • impoverished conditions,
  • relationship struggles and finances.
  • It causes extra stress and strain on, Black fathers, and their relationships with their kids.

Myrna – I actually just started reading Mike Tyson’s book “Undisputed Truth”. If you want to hear about a messed up Black family with no role models, this is the book to read.  I couldn’t believe all the stuff that Mike Tyson lived through as a child without a, Black father, and an, absentee dad. How can, Black Dads, have a relationship with their kids and a relationship as a husband when all they know is dysfunction?

A Guide for Black Fathers

Why did you write the book “Reclaim your Visibility: A Straightforward Guide for Black Men to Improve Themselves and their Relationship with your Children?

Dr Carl – I wrote this book simply because of this: I got it wrong for many years and I want to assist in the idea of, black fathers,  not having to go through being an, absentee dad, and learn from my mistakes. My eldest daughter and I  had a very rocky path and I don’t want that to go in vain. I don’t want to just talk about the plight of, Black Fatherhood,  I want to do something about it. If I can help one, Black Father, have a better relationship with their child or children, then it’s totally worth it.

Book: reclaim your visibility, Black Fathers
Book: reclaim your visibility, Black Fathers

Myrna – What makes your guide book different from all the other, Fatherhood, books?

Dr Carl – I am not the old wise man on top of the mountain talking to the village. The reason why this book is different is I literally started to repair my relationship with my eldest daughter this past summer. So this book is about real life, not theory.

Myrna – A lot of, Black Fathers, are, absentee dads. Do you think that they can repair the damage and build back a relationship with their children?

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Dr Carl – Absolutely! We can’t always take it back; but we have to learn from these mistakes and move on. That is the basis of the book and that’s why it’s called “A Straightforward Guide for Black Fathers to Improve Themselves and their Relationships with their Children” Because a lot of times, black fathers, need healing ourselves.

How to offer support for Black Father in College

Myrna – You mentioned that you did a doctoral thesis and research on Black Fathers in Colleges. Tell us about that.

Dr Carl – The dissertation is actually on, Black Student Fathers, and their persistence and perseverance in community Colleges. I was a community college, Black Father, with a child and a lot of times, these schools have programs for mothers; but no guidance for, Black Dads. I wanted to do something different and focus on this very specific population, black student fathers, in community college settings.

Myrna – Tell us about your media company – Stokes Media LLC.

Dr Carl – In the media piece, I do several things. This is my official company where I do speaking engagements, seminars conferences, trainings and mentoring. The other sides of my books are self-published. I’m also assisting other people to help get their stories out and become published Authors. So the whole Stokes Media concept embodies all those things.

Myrna – Tell our listeners and those watching on YouTube how to contact you and get a copy of your book.

Dr Carl – The easiest way to contact me is to go directly to my website www.drcarlstokesjr.com. You can go right to the contact page and fill out the inquiry form. You can ask questions, leave comments/feedback or whatever you want to do.

Myrna – You also mentor, Black Fathers, at a non-profit organization. Tell us about that.

Dr Carl – I actually do, parenting classes, for an agency here in Buffalo called the “Family Help Center”. So when parents are looking for assistance, I help.

Transform Your Mind iHeart Radio
iHeart Radio

How Co-parenting can help Black Fathers stay visible

Myrna – When you do the, parenting classes, can you walk us through some of your subjects or the things that you talk about? In this conversation we’ve been focusing on, Black Fathers, but all fathers can benefit from your book and, parenting. What advise would you give them?

Dr Carl – I would say the number one advice I would give to parents is on, co-parenting. I don’t care if you don’t get along, I don’t care if all broke up because he was doing this or doing that.  What’s important is the child or the children. We have to learn to get along for the sake of the children and be fair to each other for the sake of the children. Your children are witnessing and understanding these arguments, these disagreements, these accusations and things like that.

We tend to think that the kids are stupid and they’re not listening to anything. Let me tell you, they’re taking in everything, they’re taking in how you feel, they’re taking in the energy that you’re putting out and they are internalizing the things that they’re hearing. So, co-parenting, is key especially in our community we have to get that fixed.

What is the message for Black Fathers

Myrna – What is the message that you want them to take away with when they close the book?

Dr Carl – The predominant message of the book if I had to break it down into one main theme, I would say I would want my, black fathers, to understand how important we are to the situation. As a foundation of the family, to us being better as a community as a whole.  Black Fathers, are so valuable, we are so important, we have to take care of ourselves, we have to get over this idea of stepping back or I can’t deal with this.

We have to understand how meaningful it is for us to be around and holding down our families. We hold down our households, our households work together to hold down our neighborhoods, our neighborhoods hold it down together to hold down our communities and it spreads on like that.

We don’t need to worry about or hope for everybody else to do this for us, we can do it ourselves; but it starts with us being in the house and visible to our kids. Even if you don’t live in the house, I’m just saying the presence of involvement is necessary. Not everybody is going to be together, and that’s why we talk about, co-parenting. Our presence is so valuable, we have to make sure that we handle our business as a, black father.

Transform your Mind TuneIn Radio
TuneIn Radio

Myrna – Where can they get the book?

Dr Carl – You can get the book on Amazon Kindle. If you want a signed copy you can get it from me directly at www.drcarlstokesjunior.com.

If anybody wants the Audio book, go to my site www.drcarlstonesjr.com. Order the Audio book and there’s a free sample on there.

Enter the code “stay visible2021” and you’ll get 25% off of the Audio book.

Conclusion

Black Fathers, are important to the community. Any father is important to the community; but we’re concentrating on our community, the black community. Our community is jacked up. Like you said you go to your friend’s house and they’ve got a mom and a dad and food in the kitchen and everybody is getting along. You’re not outside throwing things at each other and having the police come by and all that which is a lot of which is the lifestyle of some children in the, black community.

Shout out to my Atlanta audience. Hopefully your daughter can listen on the radio WDJY 99.1 FM.

I want to encourage you guys if you’re watching us on YouTube to please subscribe. We’re trying to grow our channel because it’s much more exciting to actually see the person that I’m interviewing. So, if you’re watching on YouTube, kindly subscribe so you’ll be able to get the new videos as they come out every week.

If you’re listening on the radio and you want to be able to hear the podcast another time other than the radio broadcast, I encourage you to subscribe to any of the 11 podcast players that the show airs on.

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If you’re in iTunes, please read and review because that allows us to grow our audience as well. I also have a Facebook group called Life Coach. I invite you guys all to join.

Additional Resources

Celebrating Black Love Introducing BlackdateBox

https://blog.myhelps.us/self-love-secret-out-of-the-snares/

How to Embrace Your Goddess in the Bedroom: 50 Shades of Grey Style

Embrace your Goddess in the Bedroom

Would you like to have, 50 shades of Grey, in your Bedroom? Find out how to have the, sexual confidence,  of, Dakota Johnson, by embracing your, Goddess,  in the Bedroom. Life Coach Myrna Young, interviews Intimacy and Orgasmic Coach, Margo Blake. Margo is going to teach you How to Embrace Your, Goddess, in the Bedroom with,  sexual confidence.

As a teen mom Margo was forced into developing her, sexual confidence, at an early age. At 48 years old she decided to learn the secrets of the, intimacy, that had always eluded her. Even though she was always, sexually confident, She wanted to know more about the RAW, Vulnerable parts of herself that she always held back from men and address her, fear of intimacy.  She wanted to find out for herself and also to teach other women to embrace there, intimacy issues. So she started, intimacy coaching,  teaching women How to be, sexually confident, and embrace their Goddess in the bedroom, 50 shades of grey, style.

Your own, 50 Shades of Grey, in the bedroom

In celebration of the movie “50 Shades Freed” and Valentines Day, I wanted to give my listeners a gift. A gift of Awakening along the lines of the Awakening felt by, Dakota Johnson,  by Christian Grey.

https://www.cosmopolitan.com/uk/entertainment/a17036582/jamie-dornan-naked-fifty-shades-freed/

Margo teaches women to use their voice to tell their partners what they want and don’t want. She teaches women that men should be in servitude to them and they should have, sexual confidence, about their sexuality, embracing their Goddess and their, 50 shades of grey, in the bedroom fully!

As women of all ages are bored with their partners, the movie, 50 Shades of Grey, captures and excites women, the same way Christian Grey captures and excites, Dakota Johnson. Women are bored with the vanilla love making and vanilla lifestyle. We want our ice cream with sprinkles on top!

Melania Trump is one, Sexually Confident, woman! In an interview with Howard Stern, the First Lady disclosed some steamy information about her intimate life with the President. Read more: https://amomama.com/56829-melania-trump-confides-presidents-strong.html

 

Show notes: Goddess in the Bedroom 

Can you tell my audience your back story. How did you start,  intimacy coaching?

Well I’m going to try to do this very quickly because I am 54 years old and fabulous, so I’m going to try to speed it up. I was a teenage mom at 16 years old. I started to embrace my, sexuality, as a teenager but lacked, sexual confidence, and I had no, intimacy, with my partners.

I got married and divorced and when I turned 48 I felt I was missing out on life. I was close to 50 years old and my whole history of my relationships with men was sad. Men always left me. I’m going to transition out my relationship which was going on 10 years and I wanted to be me and embrace my, sexuality and become more intimate with my partners.

That’s how I became an, intimacy coach, and started, intimacy coaching. I did a transformational workshop and certification with One Taste Coaching and I started to mentor clients for the last

six years. The last three years I’ve been on the journey of becoming an intimate orgasmic Life Coach with One Taste.

2. Question 2: What advice would you give to young women today on how to embrace their, Goddess, in the Bedroom and to How to be confident about their, sexuality?

If I had to give myself my sixteen-year-old self advice about my sexuality the first thing I would have asked was, why am I with this particular guy? As they develop, sexual confidence, you want to start telling men what you want and by doing that, we create a whole world of men of servitude. So once again the advice I would give young women and older women is learning to communicate what your desires are. I want it this way, no I don’t want it that way.

50 shades of Grey
50 shades of Grey

50 Shades of Grey the Movie

In the movie, 50 Shades of Grey, Dakota Johnson,  is a young woman inexperienced in sex and becomes drawn in the world of a, dominatrix, Christian Grey. All three movies were well received; but it still received a lot of criticism about showcasing abuse of women. What do you think the message of the film, 50 shades of grey,  is for young women like, Dakota Johnson?

The movie, 50 shades of Grey, to me is is all about love and service and sex and that kind of thing

but I remember when I took my mom to see the movie. I posted it on Facebook several women responded with outrage saying how can I glorify that movie it abuses women.

Margo- I embrace the movie, it’s of excited us to escape having a vanilla lifestyle. It’s a different

type of lifestyle that they both agree on. It’s all about giving up and surrendering to your man. It’s all about, intimacy, and, sexual confidence. That’s what, Dakota Johnson, did she surrendered to the power-play. She trusted herself , and her, sexuality.

That person that posted on your Facebook page that she was abused couldn’t have seen the movie. She didn’t see what you and I saw, because there was no abuse, it was it was consensual sex even though Christian Grey was a, dominatrix.

What constitutes, intimacy?

Margo what would you call, intimacy? Is it that raw vulnerable part that you allow your partner or your friends to see?

Margo- Intimacy, it’s the part of you that does not lie. It’s the part of you that allows your friends, your family, or your lover to look you in the eye and connect with you. So hypothetically if you are feeling sad can look at your daughter or your daughter can look at you and connect with you?

Because some of us were masks. We wear a mask our whole life, we don’t allow people to see that vulnerable part of us.

Intimacy, is being able to communicate what you’re feeling and not masking. Intimacy, is allowing that person to really see you without lying and without the drama.

Myrna – How does, intimacy, come into play in the bedroom? How do we find our, Goddess, in the bedroom?

Margo – Intimacy, is having the ability to tell your partner exactly how you want it, when you want it and how long you want it. That’s, intimacy. You don’t need to be like an army instructor, you just communicate. There’s no words it’s just your bodies and it’s just your mind.

Additional Resources 

https://blog.myhelps.us/alchemy-desire-episode-5-long-term-relationship-dance/

How to Embrace Female Sexuality and the Divine Feminine