How Women Get a Seat at the Table

Women are you invisible in the boardroom and have no say? Do men listen when you speak? If the answer is no, then find out how to get, a seat at the table.

In this episode I interview Kimberley Bussey Lewis, Author of , A Seat At The Table, Or Part Of The Meal: Creating A Culture Of Diversity

How did you come to become passionate about, diversity and inclusion, for, women of color?

How to Get a Seat at The Table

I first really started thinking about, a seat at the table,  when I was a very young reporter in Charleston, South Carolina.  I was the only female reporter at the time within this 600 person company.  And what I was struck by is that there were so many decisions that were being made that we would complain about; but none of us had, a seat at the table, to help make those decisions.

I realized that if I didn't have a place in the room that I was both invisible and silent; so it didn't matter how much I complained or how much I didn't like what was going on or simply just didn't understand it because I was not part of the discussion; I needed, a seat at the table.

So that's where my passion for, diversity and inclusion, was born.

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CNN wrote a column on getting, a seat at the table, for women. They were discussing congresswoman Harris, basically what they're saying was that women are invisible and they have no say.  When they speak no one listens.  So I understand what you are saying.

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What happens when there is no seat at the table

I stayed in that company as a reporter without, a seat at the table, about 12 years.  It took me that long to get that awakening.  Sometimes we think that we are fortunate to have a job so we don't want to stir the pot.  I just increasingly became more and more of a little rebel challenging the status quo. Eventually I left  and ventured out to write my first book.   I was scared to death.  Because here I am I'm going to write a book, I'm going to leave my job.  I took a leave of absence to write the book;  but it was really a step of faith and in writing the book and doing the research.

I became energized when I interviewed older relatives, my mother and great-aunt who were already in their 80s and 90s at the time. I  became energized by their tenacity as, Black women. I knew that we had a lot of strong men in my family, but my eyes are really flew open at the strength of the, black women, and how they held businesses up,  they held a family up and the men of the family up, and brought us all together.

I stumbled into the nonprofit arena by my volunteer work. I was volunteering and working on writing the  book and one thing led to another.  I got to a small job at an organization that was run by a, black woman, who became my mentor.  She took me under her wing and even though I was  just volunteering she taught me so much about strength and tenacity and making your voice count.

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Diversity and Inclusion for Women of Color

Her company was called Family Assistance Management Services

And she was the first black female insurance broker in SC. She had been a full time teacher before she built quite a nest egg with her husband. They owned several pieces of property in Charleston SC. She then became a broker and started several businesses, an insurance company, a computer training clinic all kinds of other businesses, because she had a passion for helping people.

You got your feet wet on the nonprofit arena and but it sounds like you have, a seat at the table, at Goodwill Industries. Why you write the book, “A Seat at the Table or a part of the meal?”

I was born in September 1964 a month after the discrimination Act, and my parents had not long moved to Charleston, SC. All of my siblings, I  have one brother and two sisters, they had all been born at home in the country by a midwife so since it was now illegal for place public places to discriminate my father thought, well I will take my wife to this nice Hospital for my fourth child to be born.  So my mother was in labor he rushes her down to this hospital the Medical University of South Carolina and by this time she'd begun to hemorrhage as I was a breech baby.

It was pouring down rain and he got my mom into the emergency area into the lobby and he started screaming for the doctors to come and help they turned looked at them and turned their backs right away.  All the white doctors and nurses ignored them, so he ran up to them and screamed my wife is bleeding you got to help her and someone told him to just sit down we'll get to you.

So he scooped her up, put her in a wheelchair and ran with her down the street to the black Hospital. McLennan banks Hospital in the pouring rain with my mom gripping for life on that wheelchair.  He pushed her up into the emergency area and as soon as they saw that she was drenched in blood they rushed her into the emergency room and delivered me.  The doctor who delivered me was a, woman of color, from  South Africa and he named me Kimberly after the Kimberly diamond mines.

Black Women are born to be at the table

It sounds like you were born in to do this work!

I was tried of being the only, Black woman, in the room. I felt we as, Black women, have to do something to get , a seat at the table. If anyone was going to wave that flag of, diversity and inclusion, equity and of, diversity, it should be Goodwill Industries. So it really began then.  We started a task force with a group of CEOs and started to study, diversity and inclusion, and equity programs with fortune 500 companies and fortune 100 companies and other nonprofit organizations. We studied who was doing it well, what were they looking at, what were the metrics and how do you build that diverse pipeline.  We came up an implementation plan.

We were really intentional about attracting, maintaining and keeping a, diversity, workforce.  Whether it is individuals who are Hispanic or individuals who African-American or LGTBQ or disabled.  We recognize that all of that build a table of, diversity.

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The first time that I heard the phrase, a seat at the table, was from one of my coaching clients and I've heard it several times since. I heard Gabrielle Union say it that she's just gonna make her own table because you know the black actresses in Hollywood are still working to, get a seat at the table.  They go through the same discrimination with, diversity and inclusion.  It's not just in Corporate America or in the board rooms.

Women of Color getting a seat at the table

Kimberly you have, a seat at the table,  what advice would you give to women who are hitting the glass ceiling and get, no seat at the table.

African-American women unfortunately have been absent from the room!  We have not even been invited into the room much less have, a seat at the table, for quite some time.  Women in general have been hitting the glass ceiling for quite a long time.  I've heard that men are hired based on what their hiring manager or that supervisor thinks that they can do while women are hired or promoted based on performance.  it is that way because the majority of the, seats at the table, are already held by men.  Predominantly white males and they look for men who look like act like they came from where they come from.

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Black women in order to get, a seat at the table,  have to do 3 things:

  1. They have to network. It’s all about relationships. Else there is, no seat at the table. Everything that you do is about relationships and it's about networking.  If you didn't grow up playing golf, learn.  Go around places and do things that make you feel uncomfortable. But you must be part of the conversation. Go to the theater,  go to the Opera, you could serve as an usher and get free tickets.
  2. Get a mentor – All women should have a mentor.
  3. Get a Sponsor – a sponsor and a mentor are two different people. A mentor is someone that you can talk to about your fears and your aspirations. A mentor can give you sound advice and can talk you through some of the issues that you're having and help you create a plan a plan of attack.

A sponsor on the other hand is going to be that person who's going to make sure that you're invited to that meeting.  They're going to take you under their wing.  They're going to make sure that there's a place for you in the conversation and that there is, diversity and inclusion, that you are a part of the discussion. Sponsors are usually white males.

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Book: Seat at the table

Have you ever wished that you had the information to elevate the conversation at work on how to build a culture of diversity, equity and inclusion?  Well, now you do; with my newly published book A Seat At The Table or Part of the Meal, by Kimberly Bussey Lewis.  This book will give you examples of intentional efforts that will level the playing field and yield dividends for your career and your company. The book can be found on Amazon – A Seat at the Table Or Part of the Meal, by Kimberly Bussey Lewis or on www.motivationalmuse.com, so get your copy today and your seat at the table.

 

Additional Resources, A Seat at the Table

http://blog.myhelps.us/how-transform-your-career-with-purpose/

How to Ask for a Raise or Anything you Want in Life.

http://blog.myhelps.us/what-are-the-secrets-to-success-my-10-secrets/

https://www.demos.org/research/taking-our-seat-table-black-women-overcoming-social-exclusion-politics#Black-Women%E2%80%99s-Leadership:-Making-a-Way-out-of-No-Way

https://www.talentintelligence.com/blog/bid/377611/inclusion-and-the-benefits-of-diversity-in-the-workplace

 

How to Reap What You Sow in Sales

Most of us are familiar with the seeds of, tithing, and giving; but the law of, sowing and reaping, go way beyond the physical.

My guest today is  Dr Denise Johnson, Spiritual Psychologist, on her radio program “Spiritual Principles for Emotional Healing.”

In this interview, I share my back story of how I became conscious and awakened, my first book, Becoming Conscious, my Awakening, the situations and storms in my personal life that resulted in my spiritual growth and evolution, and finally my topic “Are you Eating your Seed, How to Reap where you Plant”

In this episode I also share how Tony Robins “Unleash the Power Within” seminar ushered me in the direction of my purpose.
You see I was on my way to becoming a house wife when I happened to attend one of Tony's “Unleash the Power Within” seminars and left the experience totally fired up!

Two months later, I was the proud owner of my first stretch limousine and the CEO of “A Royal Livery Limousine Service”
Six years later, I was being honored with “Entrepreneur of the Year

The Law of Sowing and Reaping

Here is Gerald Butler's experience with the “Unleashing the Power within” seminar!

“Fear is a huge issue for me. This technique Tony has is a really smart way to literally set those fears aside… That to me, is unleashing the power within.” – Gerard Butler

As a distinguished actor, Gerard Butler, spends his life at the next level. Between his countless roles, Gerard is also a dedicated philanthropist. Introduced to Tony Robbins through his dad when he was 17, Gerard had listened to several audio programs before attending Unleash the Power. Despite living life in the public eye and being one for adventure, Gerard struggled with losing focus and being consumed in fear. Before attending Unleash the Power Within, he even found himself nervous about participating with 10,000 other people. Enraptured by the intense energy of the event, his nerves quickly disappeared and he found himself finally able to move towards overcoming his habit of fear. Gerald learned the, law of sowing and reaping, sow joy and reap joy instead of fear.

How coaching helps you learn the laws of sowing and reaping

Life Coaching,  is taking the client from where they are today to where they want to be tomorrow.
Life coaching,  is different from sports coaching.
If the client does not get the victory, you don't fire the coach!

The life coach's role is not to design the plays, but to Help the client discover the right plays!

As a spirituality coach, I help my clients understand who they are?
What beliefs have been holding them back from success.
What are the obstacles they have to overcome to achieve success in life and the concept of, sowing and reaping.

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What are some of the seeds you need to plant to reap success

Most of us are familiar with the seeds of, tithing, and giving.
The bible teaches that if you bring your tithe into the storehouse, God would multiply it 60, 100 times.
But, the law of sowing and reaping, go way beyond the physical.
My sales manager told me once to “To Reap where I Sow”
That means that as a field sales agent, I am building relationships in my, sales territory, I am, sowing seeds.
Similar to a real estate agent who farms a territory.
You don't want to spend years building, sowing, and then leave before the harvest!

Sowing seeds, are important in your job, in your marriage, in your friendships, with your children.
The bible teaches to love as you want to be loved, you must give first whatever you want to receive!
In your job, if you are faithful, working hard every day as unto the Lord, then your seeds will grow into the harvest of a promotion.
Just keep watering the seed through service and attention.

Why does God give you a seed?

As is taught in the parable by Jesus and the 3 servants entrusted with bags of silver by their master; God expects you to multiply whatever he gives to you.
He does not give you a talent or a gift for you to bury it or hoard it for yourself; no he gives it to you to benefit his kingdom.

Let me explain that using a physical example, the apple tree. Each apple has 5 seeds.
500 apple trees can produce an orchard of 30,000 apples. Proprietary growing and pruning methods developed by Tree Plantation, can double that again to over 100,000 apples per acre.
In a similar way, God gives you seeds so that you can scatter them and produce fruit!
He can blow your seeds where you did not even plant!

How to Make your Ground Fertile for sowing and reaping.

To make your ground fertile, you have to hear the word, and do the word.
You can't reap a harvest without first tilling the soil, you have to make the soil ready to receive the nutrients to grow the plants.
One way to do this is to find your burning bush!
What did God put inside of you that he wants you to bring to fruition?

How to Equate the Laws of the Harvest to the Laws of the Universe?

Whatever you sow you shall reap!
You reap in proportion to what you sow, so sow generously.

Remember the oak tree lives in the acorn!

Small things do grow into big things.
Keep hitting the anvil, do something small every day to water the seed you have in the ground.

What is the Eating Your Seed Concept?

You have to save some of your earnings in order to plant it.
If you consume it all, you will have nothing to, sow, and you will always be without.
That is why your financial planner advises you to save 10% of your income to invest and get a return.

The bible teaches us that if you give, it will be given to you, A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over.
But it starts with giving.

Give whatever you want to receive, plant whatever you want to sow!

In closing, this is your season, this is the right time, start planting your seeds, keep watering them every day and watch God turn your apple into an orchard!

If you like this content please subscribe to my iTunes channel
coach Myrna iTunes link

Additional Resources

http://blog.myhelps.us/how-to-unleash-power-within/

 

Why Homecare is Absolutely the Best Option For Dementia Patients

Home health care for Dementia patients

If you have, dementia, then there are certain, nursing care, needs when, dementia, presents itself because it goes until death. Let's say that my mom or someone I'm responsible for starts exhibiting symptoms of, dementia.  How do I decide on whether to put them in a, nursing home, or to get, home care?

Listen to the full podcast interview here:

 

My guest today is MERRILY ORSINI, Pres/CEO of Corecubed, is considered a thought leader in the healthcare at home industry and is involved in numerous organizations, providing insight and advice. Merrily is a leader in the Help Choose Home initiative, podcast creator and host. She focuses on educating how and when to choose healthcare at home. Orsini won a Lifetime Achievement in Business Award at the 2017 Stevie Awards for Women in Business. Orsini’s business ownership began with a geriatric care managed in-home care agency, a venture that garnered her the prestigious Ernst & Young Entrepreneur of the Year Award in 1996

Myrna – Tell us your journey into your first geriatric care managed in home care agency.  Was it because you had a, dementia, parent who needed help?

Introduction to Home Care

Merrily – I sort of fell into it.  I have a master's in social work and an interest in helping people. I was in a personal situation where I needed to make more money.  So, I decided to become an entrepreneur and start my own Business.  Soon after I opened the doors of that business, I got a request from a friend of mine to provide what at that time we called a babysitting service for one of her clients whose wife had senile, dementia.

That began was a lifelong commitment for me to provide care for anyone who is suffering from, Alzheimer's.  We progressed with my first patient  from her early stages of, Alzheimer's dementia, through end stage.

We ended up caring for lots of other people with lots of other issues but the issue of, dementia, is probably the most frightening and the hardest care. I stayed in the, home care, space directly providing, nursing care, services from 1981 to 1998.

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Myrna – I don't have any personal experience with this, in my family but there's a lot of movies out there that address the subject of, Alzheimer’s disease. The most famous is the movie the Notebook.

When I started, menopause, I personally started forgetting things and I was very afraid of that it was the start of, Alzheimer’s disease. But I was reassured by my doctor that if there is no history of, dementia, in my family then there is a good chance that I would not get, Alzheimer’s disease.

 

What kinds of services do you provide in the home healthcare space for dementia patients?

Merrily – my business provides support to the industry.  I'm not in the direct provision of, home care, anymore.  The thing about, dementia, is that it's not a one-size-fits-all disease. It also manifests itself differently in different people.  Some people become very calm, quiet and reserved and other people become aggressive.

The disease progresses at different times,  it is a debilitating disease if you have an, Alzheimer’s,  type, dementia, or some of the other kinds of, dementia, it's debilitating and it gets worse.

For instance you mentioned, menopause, there are several things that do cause something that looks like, dementia.  For instance, medication mismanagement.  I had a client one time who was severely malnourished, and that malnourishment actually translated itself into, dementia.

The question of, home care, it is again it's not a one-size-fits-all because someone who has a, dementia, needs a totally different kind of care than someone who has a frailty or a disease. It's two totally different kinds of care and it's also takes different kinds of caregivers.

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Why Home Care is the best option for Dementia Patients.

There's different ways that you actually can talk to someone or be around someone with, Alzheimer’s, and there's a handful of generic kinds of rules for, nursing care; but the biggest one is this. It is hard for families is when someone starts forgetting and they actually have, dementia.

That's irreversible and it's going to get worse. the worst thing you can do is try to orient them to right now, because they're not there.  They're not mentally in the present and it's very scary for someone with the, dementia, to think that they're somewhere else and then have someone try to orient them today.

It’s like waking up in a dream and you know you you're dreaming you're someplace and if someone said you're not there it would be scary. The, dementia, patient  turns against them, because they quit trusting them.

They quit trusting them because the person is trying to orient them back to reality.

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Dementia Test

The mini mental status test is about five questions:

  • It starts off with “what day is today”
  • Who's the president of the United States
  • Ask them to make you a cup of tea because that requires is sequential steps.
  • Can they still dress themselves or take care of themselves. Oftentimes not because they don't remember.  Sometimes people with, dementia, take all their clothes off and run out into the yard.

So many of the normal activities of daily living processes that you that you would not lose unless you had, dementia.

 

Ways to prevent Alzheimer’s type dementia

If you have a healthy lifestyle and by that I mean eating well, exercising and getting plenty of sleep. All of those things can help you prevent that onset of, dementia, but if you actually have an, Alzheimer’s,  type, dementia, no matter what you do it is going to eventually come.

Keeping your mind active is the other way to prevent the onset of, dementia. We're creatures of habit so if you brush your teeth with your right hand, try brushing your teeth with your left hand.  Simple things like that.

Learning a foreign language that's one of the most amazing things you can do because it uses parts of your brain that you don't normally use.

So if you've done crossword puzzles your whole life and you think by continuing to do crossword puzzles you're going to somehow keep dementia at bay, that's not true.  You need to do something different like learn how to dance.  Do something that involves your body and your mind, that is different than anything that you've ever done before.

 

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Is  Alzheimer’s dementia different from just dementia?

You characterize, Alzheimer’s dementia, from just, dementia, can you give us what the difference is?

Merrily – There are all different kinds of, dementia.  Alzheimer's, is what we most hear about; but it is a specific disease that has some specific characteristics.

 

There are other types of, dementia.

  • Lewy Body dementia which is what Robin Williams had
  • There’s frontal-temporal dementia.
  • Alcohol related dementia that comes from overusing alcohol
  • Vascular Dementia
  • Mixed dementia and that is a combination of Alzheimer’s dementia and Vascular dementia.

 

Home Care for Dementia patients

If you have, dementia, then there are certain, nursing care, needs when, dementia, presents itself because it goes until death.

Let's say that my mom or someone I'm responsible for starts exhibiting symptoms of, dementia.  How do I decide on whether to put them in a nursing home or to get, home care?

There is no universal long-term care program for people in America, we have an overly complicated, home care, system.  Some of it funded by the government and some of it paid for privately, so it really depends on what your financial resources are and what your support system is.

Right now very few people want to go into a congregant, nursing home, setting because of the exposure. You look at the deaths in America where 40 percent or more happen in congregate, nursing home, care settings from COVID 19.

So, if you have a loved one with, dementia, the first thing to do is go somewhere where you can get a real good screening.  I would recommend a geriatric evaluation and treatment program through a teaching university.

The next step after they say you do have a progressive disease, is to really look at time frame, because a lot of people can stay at home with just a little bit of care as long as there, dementia, is not progressed to the point where they are endangering themselves.

Staying at home is probably the best place because people who have, dementia, like familiar surroundings and they also like a routine.

But the question between, home care, or, nursing home, really comes down to cost and support.

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Tell us about your podcast Help Choose Home.

The reason I started the Help Choose home podcast, is that what I have found is people don't actually look for any of these answers or even information until they have a need. Someone has a care need for a family member and then they start researching. So the Help Choose home podcast, is really just about educating people about how to choose, nursing homes, or, home care.

How can those listening and watching on YouTube connect with you?

The national association for home care and hospice which is one of the sponsors of my podcast has very good resources and you mentioned AARP.  AARP has excellent resources as well The home care association of America and the National Palliative Hospice and Palliative care organization.

 

My own website is www.merrilyorsini.com My business is corecubed.com

 

I'm inviting you to join my Facebook group called life coach and please subscribe to the podcast on our YouTube channel and where ever you get your podcasts.

 

Additional Resources

How to Find your Purpose and Destiny By Your Natural Abilities

Ways to find your Purpose

 

One of the ways to  find your, purpose and destiny, is to to look inside at your natural ability. You were created with a, purpose. Find your, purpose and destiny, by looking at what you have in your hand.  There is something you can do better than anyone else on the planet. Seek and you will find it.

This week on #Mindset Transformation radio with coach Myrna, we give insights on 6 Ways to Find Your,  Purpose and Destiny. Coach Dan Willms and I  interview Keshia Marie Morris Desir, Political Activist, as she shares how she found her, purpose and destiny.

 

Introduction to Finding Your Purpose and Destiny

Purpose,  If you don't have one, you will will never feel that spiritual fulfillment.  The bible teaches that people without a, vision, shall, perish.

I feel that having, vision, lines up with your, purpose, because God places the desires into your heart of what you were born to do.
That is the same statement that God made to Adam and Eve in the garden of Eden. He told them that if they ate from the tree of knowledge, then they will surely die. And they did!
Not a physical death; but a spiritual death. In a similar way the bible teaches that people without a, vision, shall perish, again not a physical death, but in spirit
.
You see, having a, purpose, inspires you to live and not die!

I love this quote from the great Dr. Wayne Dyer

 

“Purpose, inspires you. When you are inspired by some great, purpose, some extraordinary project; all your thoughts break their bonds, your mind transcends limitations, your consciousness expands in every direction, and you find yourself in a new and wonderful world!” Dr. Wayne Dyer

That is what happened to my daughter Keshia Marie Morris. She became inspired after reading Nelson Mandela's book “A Long Walk to Freedom

My partner coach Dan Willms and I interviewed Keshia on our show “You Asked for it”

Here is a poem Keshia wrote and I published in my book “Out of the Snares, a story of hope and encouragement” in my chapter on, Purpose and Destiny.

Out of the Snares

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What is Purpose by Keshia Marie Morris Desir

Purpose, is continually evolving
When you emit God from your, purpose,
You close doors that God clearly opened
Know that God is behind your, purpose and destiny.
Take ownership of your, purpose and destiny, for it is not yours, but the Lords.

Purpose, requires you to be diligent
Rebuke laziness in the name of God
Have tunnel vision in regards to your, purpose
Focus on your, purpose and destiny.
Walk in your, purpose
Stand in your, purpose
Don’t forget your, purpose

Neglect those things that hinder your purpose and destiny
Don’t get caught up in daily living and,
Forget what God has purposed
You will never be perfect, only the God,
Who called you to your purpose is perfect!

Purpose, makes you leave what is comfortable
Purpose will help you endure what is uncomfortable
Just because you miss a short-term goal,
It does not take you away from your purpose

The end of your purpose is always bigger than you
Purpose, will always require some suffering!
Your, purpose and destiny, may have many fingers or parts
Beware of wolves in sheep’s clothing,
Who will try to pull you away from your purpose

When you are weak, call on the Lord
Who is with you at ALL Times!
Through him all things are possible!!!
~Keshia Marie Morris

 

6 Ways to Find Your Purpose

1. To, find your purpose, look inside at your natural ability. You were created with a purpose. There is something you can do better than anyone else on the planet. Seek and you will find it.
2. Find your purpose, by paying attention to the things you like doing. The thing you would do for free. Ask yourself what would I do today if money was not a problem?
3. Find your passion. Do you want to help starving children in Africa? Do you want to stop domestic violence? Do you want to take big money out of politics? What injustice makes you mad? Don’t just talk about it, do something about it.
4. Keep learning and growing. Grow consciously. Read books. Attend seminars, hire a coach or a mentor.
5. Pray. Keep an open connection to God, so you are able to hear him through the Holy Spirit. Ask him what he wants you to do, and he will answer.
6. Reflection. Do you know what you are good at? Are you aware of your strengths? Find a quiet place every day and meditate. It is the only way to connect to source and find out who you truly are.

Understanding Purpose and Destiny

In the principles of, purpose and destiny, bear in mind that, destiny, demands fulfillment, and, purpose, expression. Both are the two-witness principle, as life is not about, purpose, alone. Both are essential for the fulfillment of what you were created for. For, purpose, without, destiny, is like having no real life at all. It's like being on earth illegally. Therefore, we must define life from a sense of, destiny, by God's purpose and design for our life, fulfillment, and the completion of God's eternal purpose. We are to consider chiefly that God has a, purpose, in each of us to be fulfilled, for we are purposed and perfected with a, purpose, and destined and designed with, destiny.
We should take into consideration that our, destiny, comes from the true meaning of what the Father has eternally purposed us for? According to Ephesians 1:18, do we realize that our purpose is centered and ordained in the SON? Or are we so self-driven with our own ambition to fulfill our own expectation and desires?

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Additional Resources

Your Talent is Already in your Hand

 

How to Find Your Purpose in Life

Why Confidence Directly Impacts Your Success or Failure

Russel Wilson Confidence

Confidence, impacted the AFC Championship, Quarterback Russell Wilson had the, confidence, not to fold and give up and it resulted in success.

Let's say you are down by 16 points with 3 mins to go in the 4 quarter. You have played the worst game of your life. You have thrown 4 interceptions. Not only that, but the world is looking on and judging you. What do you do? Do you fold up like a flower without sunshine or do you have the, confidence, to play one drive at time? Do you dig deep and remember the last time you were down 16 to nothing and you came away with the victory? Quarterback Russell Wilson did just that on Sunday to win the AFC Championship game against the Green Bay Packers.

With 3 mins to go in the 4 quarter, Wilson was having his worst game to date; he had thrown 4 interceptions. The commentators were saying they had never seen Wilson play this bad. I started to route for them. I was routing for the underdogs, the Packers, because the Seahawks were the Super Bowl champions; but I hate to see a team embarrassed in front of millions. I have heard of quarterbacks who were tagged as not being able to win the big games. But this is where, confidence, separates the true champions. Confidence, and the spirit of never giving up. Even though Wilson had already thrown 4 interceptions to Kearse, he had, confidence, in him to give him another chance and he caught that winning touchdown and held on to that ball like his life depended on it. If you allow the facts like you just threw 4 interceptions, and you let negative thoughts snap your positive energy; you will loose. But like Wilson tearfully declared after pulling off a stunning overtime victory, he had the, confidence, in himself and in his team that they could win.

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How Confidence affects Sales Teams

I saw this same scenario play out on a, sales, team  that I was a part of. We were a team of about 40 outbound reps in a call center. The top, sales, persons on the team were selling about 40 units per day. Then a new girl was hired. She started banging out 40 units by noon!. Sales Management, thought she was cheating and started to check her sales to make sure she was not sandbagging leads. She calmly declared that she was not cheating; but that she had, confidence. She said when she picked up the phone, she had, confidence, that she was going to close the sale, and she usually did. I started paying attention to what she was doing, and I too started selling 40 units by lunchtime! My, confidence, grew.

Confidence, is usually the result of prior successes. As a sales manager, confidence, should be the first skill you coach to. If your, sales, team is not, confident, that they cannot win. You have to exhume past victories to give energy to present day activities. Why did Wilson feel that he could win?; because he won before. He knew that if there was time on the clock, his team had a chance.

Coaches need to build, confidence

“The road to athletic greatness is not marked by perfection, but the ability to constantly overcome adversity and failure.”

In, coaching, teams, you have a wide variety of players. You have your slow players, your fast players. You have the ones that are good at defense. You have the ones that are good at offense. You have the ones who would choose to drive and dish and you have the ones that would rather shoot the three. You have the people who set up the plays and you have the people who finish them. You are in charge of getting these types of players to work together and to build their, confidence.

Sure, a coach can put together a pretty set of plays. A, coach, can scream their head off in a game and try and get their players motivated. Coaching, can make you run for punishment, or they can make you run to get more in shape. The most important role of a coach, however, is to make the players on their team better with, confidence. To hopefully help them to reach their fullest potential. Players do make mistakes, but it is from those mistakes that you learn and grow.

Coaches sometimes destroy confidence by being too harsh. 

You wanted to win, and there was nothing wrong with that. I saw it in your eyes if I made a mistake, you were not too happy, which is normal for, coaching. Turnovers happen. Players miss shots.

Sometimes someone beats you in a race. Sometimes things happen. Players make mistakes. It is when you have players scared to move because of a lack of, confidence, that teams loose.

A player can be, confident,  in the way they play the game. Confident, but not cocky. It is up to the coach to build that, confidence, by highlighting the players strengths  and minimizing his weaknesses. That is what makes them improve overall, and become an asset who could become an  extremely great player and win Championships.

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What happens when a player looses confidence

The fight to get my, confidence, back was a tough one. It was something I wish I never would've had to do. Instead of becoming the best player that I could've been, I now had to fight to become the player that I used to be. My, coach, took away my freedom of playing a game that I loved. He  took away my good memories in a basketball uniform, which is something I can never get back. You can be the greatest athlete in the world, but without, confidence, you won't go very far.

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Additional Resources

http://blog.myhelps.us/confidence/

How to Shine Like a Diamond with Clarity and Value

 

Diamonds, are created far below the earth's surface from immense pressure and heat. Diamonds, are the most indestructible element.

How does finding your purpose compare to mining for, diamonds?

We come into this world from pressure. But we come into this world as coal in the rough says Marlene Bryan.  Similarly to the, diamond, we need, diamond cutters to shape us. Our, diamond cutters, are our parents, teachers, coaches, mentors, relationships,

They cut and shape us either to shine like a, Diamond, or stay as coal! Have you found your purpose?  My guest today on Mindset Transformation radio and podcast is Marlene M Bryan, inspirational speaker, author, business coach and President of Small Biz Evolution. Marlene is going to teach us

What is your purpose: Do you remember the day you asked:

  • “Why am I here?”
  • “Why was I born?”
  • “Why don’t I know my purpose?”
  • And the best of all: “Why me?”

It’s okay to ask the question why? Yet some people get hung up on the “why” and never move forward or take action to put what they have learned into action.

How to Shine Like a Diamond Rihanna

Shine like a diamond, shine like a star
Higher than the moon
and brighter than the sun
It's like a dream, it's so amazing
My heart is beating fast
I feel so fabulous
Take a chance and fly with me
It's a Fairy world
Close your eyes and you'll be there

Becoming a diamond by your thoughts

From the book “As a man Thinketh” by James Allen on the topic “Thoughts and Purpose”

Until thought is linked with purpose, there is no intelligent accomplishment.
Those who have no central purpose in life, fall an easy prey to petty worries, fears, troubles, and self-pitying; all which lead to failure, unhappiness, and loss.

For weakness cannot persist in a power-evolving universe.

A man should conceive of a legitimate purpose in his heart, and set out to accomplish it by shining like a, diamond.  He should make this purpose the centralizing point of his thoughts. He should make this purpose his supreme duty, and devote himself to its attainment, not allowing his thoughts to wander away into ephemeral fancies, longings, and imaginings.

Purpose to Become a Diamond

Even if you fail again and again to accomplish your purpose (and you must until weakness is overcome), the strength of character gained will be the measure of your true success, and this will form a new starting point for future power and triumph.

Those who are not prepared for the apprehension of a great purpose, should fix their thoughts upon the faultless performance of their duty, no matter how insignificant their task may appear.

The weakest soul, knowing its own weakness, and believing this truth- that strength can only be developed by effort and practice- will, thus believing at once begin to exert itself adding effort to effort, patience to patience, strength to strength will at last grow divinely strong.

Only by searching and mining are, gold and diamonds, obtained, and man can find every truth connected with his being, if he will dig deep into the mines of his soul!

Diamonds are created far below the earth's surface from immense pressure and heat.
Diamonds are the most indestructible element.
How does finding your purpose compare to, mining for diamonds?
We come into this world from pressure. But we come into this world as coal in the rough says Marlene Bryan.
Similarly to the, diamond, we need, diamond cutters, to shape us. Our diamond cutters are our parents, teachers, coaches, mentors, relationships,
They cut and shape us either to shine like a Diamond or stay as coal!

How do you find your purpose with the 4 C's

Your purpose can come from a place of pain or from something you love.
If you can't figure it out, get the help of your, diamond cutters!
Ask them what you do well or what your talents are.
Pain is an energy much like anger that moves us out of our comfort zone into our purpose.

What are the 4 C's of a, diamond, and how does becoming a Diamond Help us Find our Purpose?

  • CUT: The cut of the diamond determines its value. The diamond cutters in our life determine our brilliance.
  • COLOR: Color in a diamond is a flaw; but now the pink and yellow diamonds are more desirable than colorless diamonds.
    Similarly, what we consider flawed about ourselves could be our most valuable quality.
  • CLARITY: The transparency of the diamond also determines its value.
    We must also be transparent. You must know who you are and stay true to your values.
  • CARAT: The bigger the carat, the more the presumed value but a smaller diamond with all the above attributes could be more valuable.
    We should help other become greater or bigger by giving them a hand up.

Is your purpose to become a Life coach?

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Additional Resources 

http://blog.myhelps.us/how-to-awaken-to-your-souls-purpose/

Nothing is Impossible: How to Turn Life’s Challenges Into Opportunity

nothing is impossible

Nothing is impossible, If you believe. How to turn life's challenges into opportunities of self-discovery and personal success.

Todays' guest on the Mindset Transformation Radio show and podcast with Coach Myrna, is Dr. Sheila D. Williams. Dr Williams is the author of “My Mother's Keeper

https://twitter.com/drsdwilliams

Nothing is impossible, always finish the race, don't be a quitter.

Come all the way through!
Don't stop in the middle, don't turn back!
Just finish the race.
Look at life like a long distance swim trip.

When you start out you have no idea what you are going to meet up with.
You can't predict the weather, the waves, or any other hazards and obstacles on your journey.
You have to make up in your mind, that you will Come all the way through, nothing is impossible.  That if you are able, you will finish the race.
If you get to the middle of the ocean and you run into a thunder storm for instance, you just can't stop.
Going back is just as perilous as going forward. You have to, believe in yourself. You must , believe.

That is exactly how life is, you can't predict the storms in life, you can't predict the challenges that you are going come up against.
You know that they will come. You have to decide up front to, believe in yourself.
You have to know for sure that, Nothing is Impossible, if you, believe.
God planted that goal or dream in you for a reason. You have something to give to mankind.

If you, believe, you will achieve!

You just have to keep moving forward, going back is death to your dreams, it should not be an option!

Show notes Nothing is Impossible 

Today's show discusses, mental illness, and how Dr. Williams cared for her mother as she suffered through clinical, depression.
Her purpose for writing this book is to shed light on this taboo topic and offer healing to her readers who may be going through something similar.
She decide to be very transparent on her mothers, clinical depression, and how she cared for her mother from the young age of 10.

Nothing is impossible, if you, believe. Listen to hear how Dr Sheila overcame her childhood story and succeed as a Mental Health Therapist/Counselor, a behavior Analyst, Published Author, Life Coach and Educational Director. She tells how she worked sometimes 4 jobs while caring for her terminally ill mother and still was able to earn her PH.D.

I know you've you have a really you know powerful story told in your first book My mother's Keeper.  What is the book about and what inspired you to write it.

Dr Sheila – My book is about my mother.  It is a very candid look into my life and me caring for my mother.  It took me about 40-plus years to be able to tell this story. I also tell my mother's story; it was a family secret. No one wanted to talk about my mother, mental illness and the fact that had, clinical depression.

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I felt for a very ashamed for a very long time in my life about my mother’s, mental illness, and depression so at the point when I decided to go ahead and be very candid and very transparent about my life it was for the purpose of healing. Not only for myself but for anyone else who have dealt with the stigma of, mental illness.

The stigma of  mental illness and clinical depression

I decided to write specifically about my mother and her, clinical depression, as a small child who had to care for her mom instead of the other way around.

People see the doctorate degree or the position that you hold with the company you work for, or you know they see your success in other things, but they don't realize behind the scenes, you had to tell yourself, nothing is impossible, to just get through the day.

You hear the phrase don't judge a book by its cover.  You see someone with the professional title and you see these accolades and all of the things that they've accomplished; but you have no idea of the struggle or the obstacles in which they've had to overcome to get to where they are.

So I wrote the book for numerous reasons:

  • To show that, nothing is impossible, if you, believe in yourself.
  • To show the effects on the family from, mental illness, and depression.
  • You can still accomplish whatever goal that you have in life regardless of your circumstances.

What was your motivation and how did you find the strength to push through?  Did you have a vision?

Dr Sheila – from a very young child maybe four or five six years old, I did not know that my mother had, clinical depression, I just knew she was a little bit different from other kids’ moms. My mother would not get out of bed for days on end. She would not open the blinds, just lay in bed in a dark room all day.

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Is it true that nothing is impossible?

Nothing is impossible,  This means that anything is possible. Dr Sheila did not have the nurture from her mom and dad.  When she became grown, she decided she wanted to become a doctor.  She worked 5 jobs to put herself through school because she did not want student loans.  Believe in the, impossible. However, just because something is possible does not mean that it is easy, or that it should be done at all. If you use this statement, you are probably referring to something which is very difficult to accomplish or labeled, impossible.

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Additional Resources

Reflection 4 Rejection: Surviving My Mothers Abandonment and Abuse

How to Live in Infinite Possibility

 

How to use Sexual Energy to Transform Your Life

sexual energy

In every story of a successful man there has always been a woman he loved that helped him transmute his, sexual energy, to  achieve greatness.
That is because these men were able to transmute the, sexual energy, to create wealth and abundance.

Today's guest on the Mindset Transformation radio show and podcast is Ms Lorae Lauritch.
Lorae is a Sexological Body Worker and, Tantra, Facilitator and she is going to teach us how to use the energy of, sex.  We can use, sexual energy,  to create in your business and personal life.

But before we hear from Lorae I would like to share with you this bible story about, sex.

Tree of Life and Sex

In the, Garden of Eden, God made man in his own image, that is both male and female.
God is both the Alpha and the Omega
Then God decided to separate the man and the woman so he took a rib out of Adam and made the woman
He then told the man and the woman that they can partake of everything in the garden of Eden, except from the tree of knowledge.
The tree of knowledge represented the knowledge of, sex.
We know that Satan tempted the woman and told her that she surely would not die if she ate from the tree of knowledge.
And she didn't die physically; but Eve brought sin and pain to the earth by partaking of the tree of knowledge without the guidance of God.

God intended for the, sexual energy, of the couple to usher them into his presence. This, sexual energy, is the creative force in the Universe.
Masters and Saints have learnt how to transmute, sexual energy, to co-create abundance in their lives.

Sexual energy and God

Lorae Lauritch is going to teach how to use, sexual energy, to get into the presence of God and build also emotional ties with your partner.

Lorae is a sacred-sexuality educator who coaches men, women and couples to be “enlightened lovers.” Her method is to blend ancient holistic practices like, Tantra, and Taoism with the latest western medical and scientific discoveries in psychology, health, and, sex.  She does it in a way that’s practical, fun, and extraordinarily easy.

Lorae believes that when a couple comes together there is a reawakening of their, sexual energy, and their  connection with God.
But some of us are only conscious of the biology of, sex.
Some of us are using, sex, only  as a means to procreate or as control in  rape

In the Eastern Hemisphere monks practice celibacy so that they can transmute that, sexual energy, to get into the presence of God.
Masters who practices celibacy also learn to transmute  their, sexual energy.

In every story of a successful man there has always been a woman he loved that helped him transmute his, sexual energy, to  achieve greatness.
That is because these men were able to transmute the, sexual energy, to create wealth and abundance.

Napoleon Hill taught us how to do this in his best selling classic
“Think and Grow Rich”

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Tantra Sex and self pleasure

Lorae says that when she learned to self pleasure she became comfortable with talking about, sex.
She discovered that only about 70% of women can achieve orgasm through penetration; So she decided to study and become an expert on, sexuality.
Teaching women how to learn about their bodies and to get pleasure from sexual intercourse.

Sex, is more than biology it is how we come into contact with the Divine!

Lorae's teaches that sacred sexuality is playing on all the dimensions.
It is the spiritual, it is the physiological, it is the physical, it is the emotional.
Sacred sexuality, is coming into contact with your higher self.
If is used to deepen the relationship with your partner.
It is also called, Tantric sex.

Do you love Abraham Hicks? I do.
Abraham Hicks – Sexual energy, like all physical energy is an extension of Source energy

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How important is sexual energy in marital relationship?

  • It creates better health and longevity.
  • It relieves stress.
  • Sacred sex clears the energy.
  • It builds this energy called chi or Prana.
  • Our bodies gets drained during the day and sacred, sexual energy, is one way to rejuvenate the body's life source.
  • It is a healing energy.

What is Tantra ?

The, tantra, orgasm is the ability to tap into the body's energy and have it link up to longer orgasmic states.
It is a build up of, sexual energy, and comes in waves throughout the body. It is an explosion from head to toe. It is not concentrated on the genitalia.
Once there is saturation of, sexual energy, in the physical state it can be shared with your partner as you tap into their energy field to become one energy field.

One way to achieve this state is to take a charging breath.
Breathe in like you are taking in a drink through a straw.
Breathe out with sound.

Breathing exercise
Tantra,  breathing is an indirect way to turn on your partner through sound and, sexual energy, exchange.

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Additional Resources

Tantric Sex: How to Use Tantra Energy during Sex

 

The Power and Purpose of Journalling

 

Journalling, can help women experiencing problems who are feeling stuck to form solutions by writing their down. My guest today is Margaret Elizabeth Hulse, a novelist who uses her fine art and jewelry designs to illustrate her, journalling, stories. Margaret writes stories with her body, mind, spirit that she says exist in the beauty of Texas, the Caribbean, and New Orleans.

Journalling, can be inspired to transcend from the monotony of day to day, obligatory tasks and into a life life filled with passion and purpose from the power and purpose of, journalling. She says “I write relatable, yet sensual, passionate stories that take my readers on new adventures and create custom jewelry so that the wearer has something unique to set her apart from the typical, ‘go-to’ designs. I evoke an excitement that people feel they haven’t been able to tap into for a while, whether it’s because they’ve been hurt, or have simply lost themselves as they’ve tried to make ends meet.”

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How to Start Journaling

Margaret feels that through, journalling, she learned how to manifest her dream work through writing her way out of a trauma. Her first published journal simply titled, “Sketchbook,” is an illustrated short story that serves as a preamble to her novel, Sketches from the Heart of a Texas Artist. I write and speak often about the power of healing through creativity and how the more you write about something, the more likely it is to come to fruition.

On a personal note on, how to start journalling, I have always journaled to download and to write down my goals and dreams. The power and purpose for my, journalling, for me has been manifested in my life over and over.

There are 3 ways to attract anything into your life. First you think it in your mind, then you speak it into the atmosphere, then you write it down to give it form!

Journalling, can also help you out of a bad mood.
You Can Write Your Way Out of an Emotional Funk. Here’s How.

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A, journalling, story:

James Pennebaker, a distinguished professor at the University of Texas, got married right out of college in the early ‘70s. Three years after his marriage, he and his wife started to question their relationship, and Pennebaker, confused and unsettled, sank into a depression. He ate less, drank more, and started smoking. Embarrassed by what he saw as emotional weakness, he became more and more isolated.

One morning about a month into this decline, Pennebaker climbed out of bed and sat down at a typewriter. He stared at the machine for a moment, then started writing freely and frankly about his marriage, his parents, his sexuality, his career, and even death.

As he wrote, and continued to write in the days that followed, something fascinating happened. His depression lifted and he felt liberated. He began to reconnect with his deep love for his wife. But the writing had an even farther-reaching impact. For the first time, he started to see the purpose and possibilities in his life.

Pennebaker’s own experience with, journalling, helped him get through this rocky period sparked 40 years of research about the links between writing and emotional processing. Over and over again Pennebaker did studies in which he divided people into two groups and asked some to, journal,  about emotionally significant experiences, and the others to write about common things: their shoes, or maybe the cars passing on the street. Both groups wrote for the same span—about 20-minutes a day, three days in a row.

In each study, Pennebaker found that the people who wrote about emotionally charged episodes experienced marked improvement in their physical and mental well-being. They were happier, less depressed and less anxious. In the months after the, journalling,  sessions, they had lower blood pressure, improved immune function, and fewer visits to the doctor. They also reported better relationships, improved memory, and more success at work.

How to become a Life coach

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How to Heal Your Brokenness

How to Overcome Fear and Find Joy

Fear, is an, energy, and thoughts are the most powerful, energy,  force in the universe.  Thoughts can be either positive or negative.
Heading up the rear of, negative thoughts, is, fear. It is the bottom feeder or all the emotions.
If you allow, fear, to linger in your body and in your mind, It will not only attract the thing you, fear, the most into your experience; but it will also bring disease to your body.
All diseases can be traced back to, negative thoughts, or, fear. Negative thoughts, transform your body into an acidic state.

Fear, is a, negative thought, magnified to the 1000th degree.

In, fear,  mode your body is activated in the fight or flight mode.
Your body tenses, your breathing is shallow, your heart palpitates, your blood pressure is elevated, your hands and body sweat.
Not a good place to dwell!
Unfortunately, your brain cannot detect the difference between your imagination and reality, so the person in the grip of fear cannot tell the difference. They cannot tell that, fear, it is “False Evidence Appearing Real.”

Using Positive Energy to banish Fear

Today I want to teach you how to use, positive energy, to clear the, negative energy, of, fear. But first I want to review one of the Spiritual Laws of the Universe.

The Law of Sowing and Reaping

We all know of the physical laws like, Gravity.
Some laws are physical and some are Spiritual and quantum.
Understanding the spiritual “Law of Sowing and reaping” can change your world.
Understanding that whatever you create it in the spiritual world of your thoughts will manifest in the physical world.

Put another way, that means whatever you plant in the fertile soil of your mind, will manifest in your physical world.
Just like planting an apple tree. Except that in the spiritual world;

The soil is your mind, The seeds are your thoughts,
The water are your actions,
And The sun is your feelings.

If you allow, fear, to dwell in your heart and mind every day you will manifest an apple orchard in your reality.

Energy flows where Attention Goes

Whatever you focus on expands.

Fear is Negative Energy

Everything is, energy, and all, energy, attracts similar energies.
You can't put out, negative energy, and expect positive results.
You can't plant apple trees and expect oranges.

Likewise, you can't focus on what you, fear, and produce a successful result.
If you are constantly thinking of the things you, fear, you are planting a seed and based in the universal Law of Reaping and Sowing, it must germinate.
The mind or consciousness is connected to reality.
Think of something strong enough or long enough to and it will eventually manifest in your reality.
These are six words you must stamp on your mind

“You become what you think about”

When you realize that your mind is a garden you will begin to plant only the things you desire.

How to overcome fear

Exercise: How to overcome fear, write down something that is opposite of what you, fear, and start giving it the same attention you have been giving your, fear.
Since light conquers darkness, it will eventually have your, fear, for lunch!

  • Imagine you having fun traveling the world in crystal clear clarity.
  • Say daily affirmations that compliments your desire.
  • Visualize your goal so much that sometimes you are not sure what is imagined and what is reality;
  • the same way that you let fear take you out of reality.
  • Don't get disappointed if it takes time to perfect this. Remember that positive things take time to manifest,
  • it is the negative ones that show up quickly.

Weeds will sprout up, negative thoughts, of failure will sprout up.
So, every morning find the weeds and dig them up.

Remember a successful gardener will always cultivate his land.

Cultivate your mind for success.
Life is energy, whatever you put out, is returned to you.
The mind does not care what seeds you plant; it will always return what you plant.
You can plant wealth or you can plant poverty.
You can plant fear or you can plant happiness.

Here is an excerpt from the book: The Wise Heart: A Guide to the Universal Teachings of Buddhist Psychology:
The Buddha faced plenty of his own fear and terror of imminent death. This is a passage from the Buddha’s early writings that Jack Kornfield, a teacher who helped introduce Buddhist mindfulness practice to the West, quotes in his book.

How would it be if in the dark of the month, with no moon, I were to enter the most strange and frightening places, near tombs and in the thick of the forest, that I might come to understand fear and terror. And doing so, a wild animal would approach or the wind rustle the leaves and I would think, “Perhaps the fear and terror now comes.” And being resolved to dispel the hold of that fear and terror, I remained in whatever posture it arose, sitting or standing, walking or lying down. I did not change until I had faced that fear and terror in that very posture, until I was free of its hold upon me … And having this thought, I did so. By facing the, fear, and terror I became free.

Do not Fear: Definition of fear

Fear – False objects appearing real, as per the about passage, can be released by standing your ground. Our instinctive reaction to, fear, is to turn and run because as humans we are hard wired to run from pain and towards pleasure. But, as the Buddha teaches in the passage above if you stand and have the courage to not move, you become free you, let go of fear, and realize that your imagination is always worse than the reality.

Let me share a personal story on how I overcame, fear and, remove negative energy from home. 

When I first came to the United States of America, I came as a business owner. I did not have any of the benefits of a permanent resident. As my business was building, I decided to earn money as a sales person selling vacations. I was not authorized to work in the US, so I became very fearful of being found out and being deported. Every night I would dream that the immigration officials would come to my house and take me away in handcuffs. Sometimes I would dream that they would throw me in the back of the trunk.

One day, my pastor preached a sermon on, the fear factor. He said that God promises to carry your burdens, so give them to God. He said when you give your, fears, and heavy loads to God, you can't worry or take them back because that would mean that you don't have faith in God's promise to carry them. He asked the congregation to write our, fears, and heavy burdens on a piece of paper and ceremoniously throw them at the alter giving them to God. I wrote my, fear, of being deported on a piece of paper and threw in on the alter. In doing so, I, let go of fear, and became free because I gave it away to someone else, God. The good news is that I no longer was afraid of anything. Every time something came up that would potentially me fearful, I would face it and know that it will work out for my good. I stood on the scripture “I know the plans I have for you, plans to prosper you.”

Meditation to Let go of Fear

Sit quietly in a chair, be comfortable.
Place feet flat on the floor, hands clasped in your lap. Close your eyes. Be present. Focus on your breathing, feel your belly rise and fall under your clasped hands.
Breathe in for a count of 4 and breathe out for account of 6. Thus, slowing down your rhythmic cycles. Be mindful of the air as it passes through your nostrils down your esophagus and into your abdomen. If your mind wanders off bring it back gently to your breathe. Your mind can only concentrate on one thing at a time. Concentrating on your breathe bypasses your mind. Once you slow your cycles and quiet your mind, you are now in the receptive mode to change your programming.

Think briefly about something you, fear. Today we will use as our example the, fear of flying. Today we are going to use our imagination to replicate the experience of flying while you are sitting comfortably and safely in your chair.

Let's begin. visualize you are at the airport with your loved ones, your husband and 2 children. You are on your way to Venice, Italy. You chose Venice because you wanted a romantic vacation with your husband. You can't wait to ride on the Gondolas and be serenaded with live music, going to the opera and have the experience of taking a water taxi everywhere. You are excited. This energy is positive. You let this feeling of euphoria wash over you, you feel your body tingle with this positive energy. You feel good!
Now you are boarding the plane, you are starting to feel a little anxious. You board the plane and find your seat, you buckle yourself in. The pilot announces that your flight time is 6 hours and that he will be flying at a cruising altitude of 35,000 feet. He advises you to give your attention the flight attendant and pay attention to the safety information. You mentally note your exits. You listen to what to do in the event of a water landing! Your mind is going nuts with fear. Your heart starts to palpitate rapidly, you start to sweat.

Now the airplane is taxing down the runway at full speed, then lifts off the ground.
You squeeze your husband's hand, you are hardly breathing, your whole body is tight. The plane is climbing it shakes a little. You are so scared the sweat starts dripping from your forehead. The plane reaches cruising altitude, the pilot turns off the fasten seat belt sign and people start moving about the plane. You calm down a little, but still aware of every movement of the plane. The flight attendants come around and offer beverages. You ask for a glass of wine. You drink it down in one gulp! You start to feel calmer. The flight is uneventful. After what seems like an eternity the pilot announces that in 30 minutes he will be starting his descent into Venice. Your fear returns, the plane shakes a little as it descends and you are once again in the grip of fear. The plane touches down and speeds down the runway braking speed. Your body is tight, your breathing shallow. Then it is all over. You faced your fear and came out on the other side! You exit the plane and you are in Venice!

I want you now to realize that you have taken your first flight in your mind.
I want you to realize that fear is false evidence appearing real.
I want you to realize that once you face your fear, like a bully, it backs down.
I want you to realize that the energy of fear is keeping you stuck.
I want you to realize that whatever your fear, just like we took a ride on an airplane and came out alive on the other side that is how all fear works. It has no real power over you. The only thing that is holding you back from doing the things you want to do is all in your mind. So, the only way the clear it is to start with the mind. Do a dress rehearsal in the mind and then do it in the physical.

The first step in How to overcome fear is to face the fear.

The second step is to clear it from the place it is planted in your mind. Take a moment now to ask your higher self where the fear of flying came from. When was the fear planted? When you get the answer, you may think to yourself, boy that was silly or you may have a legitimate reason to be afraid of flying. Someone you know could have died in a plane crash or you yourself could have been in a plane emergency landing. The thing to remember is that you know that every time you drive on the highway you could die and you are aware of thousands of people who have died in car accidents; yet few people have a fear of driving in a car.
So, consciousness is the second step.

The third step is to clear that energy by replacing it with, positive energy. We are going to use the, positive energy, of gratitude. Sit comfortably again. Imagine a bright light entering the crown of your head moving down through your check, down your throat to your chest, down your abdomen through your feet.
Feel this light fill all your energy centers as you become fully relaxed. Now expand this energy out from your chest past the room, past your city, past your country, past the clouds, past the sun, past the planet into the stratosphere. You are now floating in cyberspace. If you can bring your fear to mind in this space, do so now.

Then replace that feeling of fear with the feeling of gratitude. Gratitude that you are alive, gratitude that you are in your sound mind, gratitude that you have a place to sleep and food to eat. Gratitude that you are wealthier than 95% of the people in the world and you have the resources to travel to exotic destinations. Gratitude that you will not let fear rob you of your joy.
Now set the intention to fly to the first place on your bucket list within the year.

If you found this post helpful, I would love to hear your comments on what your fears are, and if you achieved a successful result transferring it with these exercises. Please share this podcast and blog post with friends and family and remember to subscribe and post a review.
Transform your Mind podcast is giving away a Free Checklist you can do every morning to replace your fears with positive affirmations.
To receive please subscribe, rate and review this podcast then send me an email to info@myhelps.us with the subject line iTunes review.
Until next time Namaste

Additional Resources

No Fear : How to Live with Courage