One of the ways to find your, purpose and destiny, is to to look inside at your natural ability. You were created with a, purpose. Find your, purpose and destiny, by looking at what you have in your hand. There is something you can do better than anyone else on the planet. Seek and you will find it.
This week on #Mindset Transformation radio with coach Myrna, we give insights on 6 Ways to Find Your, Purpose and Destiny. Coach Dan Willms and I interview Keshia Marie Morris Desir, Political Activist, as she shares how she found her, purpose and destiny.
Introduction to Finding Your Purpose and Destiny
Purpose, If you don’t have one, you will will never feel that spiritual fulfillment. The bible teaches that people without a, vision, shall, perish.
I feel that having, vision, lines up with your, purpose, because God places the desires into your heart of what you were born to do.
That is the same statement that God made to Adam and Eve in the garden of Eden. He told them that if they ate from the tree of knowledge, then they will surely die. And they did!
Not a physical death; but a spiritual death. In a similar way the bible teaches that people without a, vision, shall perish, again not a physical death, but in spirit
You see, having a, purpose, inspires you to live and not die!
“Purpose, inspires you. When you are inspired by some great, purpose, some extraordinary project; all your thoughts break their bonds, your mind transcends limitations, your consciousness expands in every direction, and you find yourself in a new and wonderful world!” Dr. Wayne Dyer
That is what happened to my daughter Keshia Marie Morris. She became inspired after reading Nelson Mandela’s book “A Long Walk to Freedom”
My partner coach Dan Willms and I interviewed Keshia on our show “You Asked for it”
Here is a poem Keshia wrote and I published in my book “Out of the Snares, a story of hope and encouragement” in my chapter on, Purpose and Destiny.
Purpose, is continually evolving
When you emit God from your, purpose,
You close doors that God clearly opened
Know that God is behind your, purpose and destiny.
Take ownership of your, purpose and destiny, for it is not yours, but the Lords.
Purpose, requires you to be diligent
Rebuke laziness in the name of God
Have tunnel vision in regards to your, purpose
Focus on your, purpose and destiny.
Walk in your, purpose
Stand in your, purpose
Don’t forget your, purpose
Neglect those things that hinder your purpose and destiny
Don’t get caught up in daily living and,
Forget what God has purposed
You will never be perfect, only the God,
Who called you to your purpose is perfect!
Purpose, makes you leave what is comfortable
Purpose will help you endure what is uncomfortable
Just because you miss a short-term goal,
It does not take you away from your purpose
The end of your purpose is always bigger than you
Purpose, will always require some suffering!
Your, purpose and destiny, may have many fingers or parts
Beware of wolves in sheep’s clothing,
Who will try to pull you away from your purpose
When you are weak, call on the Lord
Who is with you at ALL Times!
Through him all things are possible!!!
~Keshia Marie Morris
6 Ways to Find Your Purpose
1. To, find your purpose, look inside at your natural ability. You were created with a purpose. There is something you can do better than anyone else on the planet. Seek and you will find it.
2. Find your purpose, by paying attention to the things you like doing. The thing you would do for free. Ask yourself what would I do today if money was not a problem?
3. Find your passion. Do you want to help starving children in Africa? Do you want to stop domestic violence? Do you want to take big money out of politics? What injustice makes you mad? Don’t just talk about it, do something about it.
4. Keep learning and growing. Grow consciously. Read books. Attend seminars, hire a coach or a mentor.
5. Pray. Keep an open connection to God, so you are able to hear him through the Holy Spirit. Ask him what he wants you to do, and he will answer.
6. Reflection. Do you know what you are good at? Are you aware of your strengths? Find a quiet place every day and meditate. It is the only way to connect to source and find out who you truly are.
Understanding Purpose and Destiny
In the principles of, purpose and destiny, bear in mind that, destiny, demands fulfillment, and, purpose, expression. Both are the two-witness principle, as life is not about, purpose, alone. Both are essential for the fulfillment of what you were created for. For, purpose, without, destiny, is like having no real life at all. It’s like being on earth illegally. Therefore, we must define life from a sense of, destiny, by God’s purpose and design for our life, fulfillment, and the completion of God’s eternal purpose. We are to consider chiefly that God has a, purpose, in each of us to be fulfilled, for we are purposed and perfected with a, purpose, and destined and designed with, destiny.
We should take into consideration that our, destiny, comes from the true meaning of what the Father has eternally purposed us for? According to Ephesians 1:18, do we realize that our purpose is centered and ordained in the SON? Or are we so self-driven with our own ambition to fulfill our own expectation and desires?
There is more to becoming a deliberate creator, than just letting the, universal laws, of attraction bring to you the desires of your heart. We all know it does not work like that. Some of you have been asking the, Universe, and praying to God for years, and you are still waiting to manifest your desires into your experience.
“Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you.
This is a big topic. There is a lot written on, the Laws of Attraction. In my book “Out of the Snares” I embrace these, universal laws, fully. I also expected and allowed what I was attracting to show up. I lived consciously believing that ..
“there are no coincidences in life, that everything moment is as it should be.” ~~Deepak Chopra
I tell the story in my book “Out of the Snares” of me coming to the USA under the USA Free trade agreement, which allows Canadians and Mexicans to open up branch offices of current businesses in the USA; but when I got to the United States, I decided I wanted the benefits of being an American. I told myself “It would be nice if I found a husband.” As soon as I concentrated on that possibility the, Universal laws, started offering up to me suitors for me to choose from!
Become a deliberate creator using the universal laws
There is more to becoming a deliberate creator, than just asking and receiving for everything you want. We all know it does not work like that. Some of you have been asking the, Universe, and praying to God for years, and you are still waiting to manifest your desires into your experience.
Here are 5 ways to help with being a deliberate creator and invoking the Universal laws.
1. Offer no resistance: You have to offer no resistance to the, universal laws, you are letting go and letting God. In the above example. If and when the thought, came to me to find a husband and I had a bad experience with a prior husband and I told myself that most men are no good, then essentially what I am doing is saying on one hand I would like a husband and on the other hand, I don’t want a man because they are nothing but trouble. That sends mixed messages to the, universal laws, of attraction.
2. You have to allow it to come in.
Look at your list of things you want to attract in your life as people outside the walls of one of the ancient cities. This is, the secret. They can’t come in unless someone opens the gates of the city. In a similar way, you have to quiet your mind and stop confusing the, Universe, with all the stuff in your head. Find time every day to meditate and allow the, Universe, and its, universal laws, to work for you.
3. You have to believe in the 7 universal laws
Faith, is the evidence of things unseen. The bible teaches that if you have the, faith, of a mustard seed, you can say to the mountain get up and go into the sea. Faith is one way to let the, universal laws, work in your life. Logically and in the physical world that is not possible but Jesus was teaching us that “If you believe you can do anything.” That is truth. I have seen amputees climb to the top of Mount Everest, I have seen people swim across lakes, I have seen human beings defy incredible odds to survive and achieve. It all starts in the mind, if you think you can.
4. You have to be conscious of your emotions.
Your emotions are a powerful indicator of if you are moving towards or away from your desires. If you feel elated and happy, you are moving in the direction of your desires; if you feel dread and nervousness then that is your heart telling you that it knows something you don’t. Learn to pay attention. The trick is to not spend time thinking about the things that make you feel bad because you will attract more of them.
5. Become a deliberate creator or Sorcerer.
Sorcerer means from the source. Becoming a Sorcerer means that you are letting source energy and the, universal laws, work for you. It means that you meditate on what you want, pray and ask God to help you get it and then you move out of the way and let him do his work. The focus here is on the word “meditate”. You have to get still and hear God. When you do, you will get inspiration and instruction on how to move that mountain out of the way. You will get instructions on how to turn your business around, how to motivate your children, new book ideas etc.
In my book “Out of the Snares” I share with you, my readers, the principles of the Bible and the Universal Laws or Truths that I stood on to win. Order your copy today.https://myhelps.us/book-order/
One of the worst, negative emotions, in my opinion, is the feeling of, being stuck; defined as moving forward or going back looks worse than staying in the misery of your current situation. How do you, get unstuck?
Our topic today is How to, Get Unstuck. This is a, life coaching, session with, coach Myrna
Being stuck, is a place of no personal power
What it feels like to be stuck
A few months back I received a note on LinkedIn from a young lady who said she was, stuck. I felt her pain deep within my soul so I offered her a free, life coaching, to, get unstuck.
She was in an, abusive relationship. Her boyfriend was physically abusive to both her and her 2 year old daughter and she feared for her life. She had the courage to pack up and leave that situation. She lived in Florida and her only family lived in Atlanta, Georgia. In order to, get unstuck, she quit her job, left her boyfriend and fled to her sister’s home in Atlanta. Her sister was unemployed and had 6 children. She was dependent on her husband for support. This young lady felt uncomfortable living in her sister’s home, because she didn’t have anything for herself and now she had to feed her and her child. She called me because she felt she should go back to her, abusive relationship!
How many of you can feel her pain?
Being stuck, is when the pain of staying in your current intolerable situation looks better than the pain of leaving.
It could be a domestic situation.
It could be an intolerable boss.
It could be a demeaning job.
How do you make the decision to, get unstuck?
How do you find the strength to want something better?
How did I coach this situation?
This is the major benefit of, life coaching, the ability of the, life coach, to see the frame.
You see you can’t see the frame when you are the picture!
Coaching to Get Unstuck
I knew that one of the reasons that my coachee was thinking of going back, was because she still loved her, abusive relationship. She was trying to get someone else to agree with her.
So I asked her “Do you still love this man?” And she said yes.
Then I allowed her to become aware of what her brain was doing. It was, stuck, in repeat.
I told her that because she still loved this man, she is using the situation of her sister’s lack as the reason to return.
I asked her “Do you think your sister would want you to go back to that situation and maybe end up dead”? She said “no.”
I said think about it. What exactly are you taking from your sister? Space. Space doesn’t cost them anything.
I asked her if she had any money?
She said “yes.” So I said, use that money to buy food for you and your daughter so you can feel better about being a charity case.
After we got past the, negative emotions, we were then able to plan for the future to , get unstuck.
You can’t plan and have hope when you are busy wallowing in, negative energy, and self-pity of, being stuck.
I asked her about job prospects and she told me she had an interview scheduled for the next day.
That my friends is the First secret to, get unstuck.
1: Hope and Faith are important to getting unstuck
Faith, that God can make a way out of no way.
Faith, that even though you can’t see the entire stairway you know that the stairs are there.
The message of, faith, in this story is that you can’t think that God intended for you to live in an, abusive relationship, being dependent on an abusive man for your survival. You have to be able to get out of the valley, get unstuck, and see the light of the mountain top. You have to know in your heart that you were meant to be more. You have to want more for your children.
Once you find that, positive energy, things will begin to open up. Opportunities will come your way, God will open doors shut by the devil and your negative emotions.
My coachee got the job we are moving in the direction to, get unstuck.
She now lives in Atlanta and she is happy!
The devil is a liar, don’t let him convince you that you are, stuck.
2: Another way to get unstuck is to move the energy around.
The universe is made up of energy. We are a bundle of energy.
When you have, stuck, energy it causes disease.
So you have to force yourself to get off the couch, you have to do something, anything.
Do it until you feel like doing it. Do the things you don’t feel like doing until you feel like doing it!
Another client of mine got fired from his job so he sat around all day with his hurt feelings.
Blaming his boss and all his friends who did not support him.
You have to get over disappointment and hurt so you can get on with it.
Don’t let tragedy destroy you and keep you, stuck.
Don’t stop, continue to stay busy.
Continue to work your plan take small steps if you can’t take big steps Automatic negative thoughts don’t take any effort on your part they come naturally like weeds in your garden.
But if you want to grow roses or orchids in your garden it takes special effort and a process.
Similarly, being stuck, on something someone did to you is natural.
Feeling angry when your kids are ungrateful for the sacrifices you made for them is natural.
Being fired after working at your job for 10 years, never taking time off for your kid’s soccer matches or dance recitals is natural.
Feeling vengeful at the betrayal of your spouse is natural.
It is natural to be angry, hurt, disappointed, vengeful; but it is important not to stay there.
It is important to, get unstuck, remove , negative emotions. You have to get over them and move on.
3: Seek the council of others when you feel Stuck
What my friend on LinkedIn did was good. She contacted a, life coach. She received council and got a fresh perspective.
Even if she not heed my advice, she still moved the energy by doing something.
One way to do this is to memorize and recite the, serenity prayer, several times per day
God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change
The courage to change the things I can
And the wisdom to know the difference.
One of the first things they taught us in coaching school is that you can’t coach someone that is not in front of you. Why was this important? Because most coachees will come into the coaching conversation complaining that their life is a mess because of the actions of someone else. The only person that you can change is yourself. You have no control over the behavior of anyone other than yourself.
4: Another way is to find peace with the situation if you can’t or won’t move right now.
I remember a sermon I heard from my first Pastor. He said whenever he felt like complaining about his wife he would pray and ask God to change him!
So for example if you are, stuck, in order to, get unstuck, you have to become aware of your thoughts. Change the way you look at the bad things he or she does. If he or she talks to you with disrespect. You can tell yourself it is not personal, that he or she speaks to everyone like that because he doesn’t know any better.
If he only talks to you with disrespect you can tell yourself that he doesn’t know you and let his words not penetrate your consciousness. He can talk but you do not hear or transfer the words. It becomes just noise.
This is a simple example but it works to, get unstuck. This is also called the Law of Allowing. It especially works in intimate relationships.
When you stop resisting and allow your partner the freedom to self-express, you open up the path towards healing the brokenness and allow the relationship to become healthy.
Concentrate only on what you are doing and saying. Stop reacting to stimuli and watch what happens.
5: Another technique is to notice when you are stuck and distract yourself
Come back to the problem later
Write out options and solutions
Write out the worrying situation
Write what you can do about it
Write what you cannot control about it.
6: Most importantly are your thoughts. Whether you are stuck or not, your thinking makes it so.
The thoughts that matter most are your self-thoughts.
It is never the situation that causes you to be, stuck, but your thoughts and feelings about the situation that makes you feel stuck.
Your thoughts influence your emotions, so to, get unstuck, think differently, and you will feel differently.
Sometimes, how you think someone should respond to you, blocks your blessings. If you move yourself and your ego out of the way.
Then maybe God can give you what he has in store for you.
Look at the bible story of Naaman. Naaman was angry because the profit did not come out and greet him and bow down to him when he came to him to heal his leprosy. Instead the profit Elisha sent a messenger out to tell Naaman to go wash himself in the river Jordon seven times and he will be restored. . Naaman went away angry because he felt disrespected. But he was smart enough to accept council from one of his servants. The servant told him he had nothing to loose by following the instructions of the profit. The servant was able to see the frame around the picture. Naaman could not. He could only see the situation that was making him mad. He decided to follow the profit’s instructions.
He went and dipped himself in the river Jordon seven times and he came out perfect and clean!.
Naaman almost missed his blessing by reacting to what he considered disrespect.
Some of you are, stuck, because of poisonous thinking.
Your thoughts can poison your spirit, and then you never see positive only negative.
As Neapolitan Hill said
As a man thinking so is he.
Shakespeare puts it another way
“Nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so”
7: You have to know yourself to grow yourself
You have to know where your pattern started.
You have to make the connection between your old story and your current circumstances
Eg. If your mother gave you up for adoption and your feeling of abandonment are keeping you stuck in Low self-esteem,
you should become aware that your past has nothing to do with your future.
You know better, that you are not your mom and she had her reasons.
The deeper truth is that you are responsible for your life and not what someone did to you.
You have to shift and take responsibility, you have to know that you keep getting into these situations because of your lack of self-esteem or because of your need for security.
Awareness is key. Once again, a coach can help if you can look at your patterns objectively.
What are you blaming?
What is your pattern? What is the evidence of your pattern?
I had a coaching client who had 3 failed marriages where the men stole from her.
We had to find her pattern and why she kept attracting and falling in love with the same type of man.
We discovered that she loved how her dad took care of her mom and paid all the bills, so she kept looking for that trait in a man.
She ended up getting the opposite.
Use your negative energy to get unstuck
Did you know that nothing exists without its opposite?
You can’t know light without knowing darkness.
In order to know if something is good you first have to experience bad!
She had to learn to create a new pattern.
She had to go inside and use her feminine power of intuition to pick a mate.
She had to listen to her inner desire and not the outer desire for material pleasures.
When she did that she shifted her pattern and created a new one.
Now she is in the best relationship of her life.
She tells me that she has touched the moon and it feels so good!
To read about my personal journey of getting Unstuck, pick up a copy of my book
” Out of the Snares, a story of hope and encouragement”
We should, play to win. I wrote the book “Out of the Snares, a story of Hope and Encouragement” with the intention of drawing, life lessons, from various aspects of my Life and how I, played to win. For example the first life event that I introduced in my book is as a victim of childhood, sexual abuse, and being born into, poverty.
The, life lesson, I share here is that of the, victim mentality.
You don’t have to be a, victim, in life; instead become a player.
Just like in the game of blackjack, if the dealer is showing a picture card and you only have small cards, you don’t chuck your hand in and say there’s no way that I can win.
You must, play to win. All you need is the intention to win and guess what, your hand is going to get better.
Quitters Never Win and Winners Never Quit
Here is a short excerpt from my book:
Intro How to Play to Win – My story
I was born into a family with nothing, my mother and grandmother were both domestic servants. My dad was in Teachers College and did not know his real father. He lived with his mom and stepfather who was an alcoholic. In 1959 Guyana was a British colony of England.
Just like England colonized India and took all the wealth out of India, in a similar way England took all of Guyana’s resources out of the country.
Most of the Blacks and Indians were living in, poverty. My mom and grandmother worked for white English folk.
As a child I was always fed and had clothes and shoes to wear. My mom and grandmother both made our clothes.
So, it was understandable that I would be drawn to my godfather, who was a wealthy man with several houses, several cars and a corner shop filled with snacks and chocolate bars. Mr. Clark as I will call him took a liking to me beyond that of a Godfather and treated me like his grandchild.
I spent a lot of time at his house. He took me out with his family every weekend and really showered me with things.
He gave me food, gold chains and gold bracelets, he was also a goldsmith. I ended up sleeping over at his house several times per week and playing with his grandchildren. He used to like to bounce me on his knee with his legs massaging my private parts.
One day my memory recalls, I was about five years old, he braced me up against the wall and caressed my body. As I got older the, sexual abuse, became more intimate.
He would rub my legs whenever I was close. His favorite was the feeling me up in the front seat of his car while driving me to school.
His hand would be under my skirt fingering my private parts. I was sure that people in other cars could see this, sexual abuse, but he said they could not.
This, childhood sexual abuse, continued for several years until one day he took me behind his shop and took my virginity with his fingers.
I didn’t tell anyone I’m not sure why. I do remember thinking that I loved him so much and wanted to die before he did.
Mr. Clark started getting a reputation for liking little girls and my dad asked me one day if Mr. Clark ever, sexual abused, me, I lied and said he had not.
I’m going to skip a couple of paragraphs, I don’t want to get into the nitty-gritty details here.
I’m going to read to you now my conclusion of this chapter.
Play to Win by collapsing your consciousness
How did I, play to win? Looking back, if I were to collapse my consciousness and become the observer in this experience, I would say that at some subconscious level I knew what we were doing was wrong. I knew that I was being, sexually abused.
I’m not sure why I chose to keep it a secret.
Research shows that children of, childhood sexual abuse, never tell, they become ashamed and feel that they are to blame. I know I have always felt shamed. It took me a very, very, long time to share my story. Writing this book was my way of coming into the light and putting the devil on notice that I will no longer let guilt and shame be a part of my life.
That was my introduction to my book.
Pick up a copy to read the full story.
Playing to Win Using CANI
I have, played to win, the, sexual abuse, card and, poverty, by concentrating on, CANI.Constant and Never Ending Improvement.
They say that the secret to happiness is always moving towards a goal and that is how I, play to win.
It is wonderful that we’re meeting today in a library because I have always been a reader.
Reading books is how you, play to win!
Tony Robbins is now a billionaire because he made himself read 700 books per year and those books taught him everything he knows.
Pat Riley of the Miami Heat said
“If you’re not growing, you are dying”
Play to win using vibrational frequency
The second way I have, played to win, with the cards I have been dealt was to become conscious of my vibrational frequency.
I learned that later in life before I wrote my first book “Becoming Conscious, my awakening”
I started understanding my vibrations. You see whenever somebody does something to us, we feel bad and what happens when we feel bad?
We attract more of the same. We always say bad things comes in three’s, that is because you are attracting them to you.
So when you’re in a funk you have to find some way to make yourself feel better, and one of the ways I do that is to always live in gratitude.
Because regardless of what’s going on in your life, there’s always something that you can be grateful for. Breath, sight, food in your fridge, etc.
So, find some gratitude and feel that energy release a positive force that reverses all the bad in your life!
In 2009 at the age of 33 Genese became CEO and founder of Passion Rescue Mission and reopened the Genecoit Vertus School of Excellence in Francois, Haiti providing tuition free education and serving over 225 students.
Genese How Have you played with the cards you were dealt in Life?
Winning has to less with the cards you have in your hand and more to do with how you play the game.
You have to, play to win.
How did I, play to win? I was born in one of the poorest countries in the Western Hemisphere, which is Haiti.
The goal is to win no matter what seven piece of dominoes or cards you have in your hand.
Kenny Rogers sings a song that says
“You have to know when to Hold and when to Fold”
Three simple things helped me play with my cards.
1. My faith in God
2. Pursuit of an education
3. A strong support system
I was fortunate enough to come to this great country to get an education and in 2009 I returned back to Haiti and reopened a school that my father built. We started with 189
students at that time currently we have 225 students getting a tuition-free education in one of the poorest, mountainous, villages in Haiti, which is Francois Haiti. We provide meals, we provide school supplies we provide uniforms and we have 12 teachers that are employed.
I have a waiting list of over 300 students wanting to get into that school right now; so it’s not enough To, play to win, we must give back. Once you get to where you need to be, you need to
reach back and help your people.
If you need information on making a donation
Please visit www.passionrescuemission.org </a
Jenny Wang Playing to Win
Jenny is passionate about helping people improve Performance through holistic learning. She is a Professional Certified Coach and a Senior Learning and Program Manager at Nutranext, which is the healthiest employer in the US. Jenny is also a Certified Health Coach and co-author of Bringing Mindfulness to Your Workplace. Jenny and I worked together at Office Depot. She was my mentor at Toastmasters, then she became my Coachee as she worked on finding her purpose. I’m Sure she has found her purpose.
Jenny – I have had some good cards. But there are some cards we cannot choose. We cannot chose our Father we cannot choose our Mother or our relatives.
I was born and raised in China in a very traditional family. I don’t have trauma in my life, my parents are very lovely and educated; but there’s one thing that we never agreed on. When I got married I never thought I wanted children.
I don’t know how many of you are natural parents; but I was not one of them. When I was at 34 years old my father called me from China had a big argument with me. He wanted to have a grandchild. So, How did I, play to win? I chose to honor my father’s request because family is important to me.
Now eight years later, people ask me what was the best decision I’ve ever made in my life? And I say “To have a child” My son has brought me so much joy, so much wonderful
things to my life that I have never ever thought that I would have.
The second card everyone has, but they also cannot chose is Passion and purpose.
The 3rd card we are dealt is Health. The most important thing for everybody is good health. I decided to take the journey of being a, Yoga Instructor, and a Health Coach.
I learned we can become happy by changing how we move our bodies. Yoga, encourages us to think about our health.
No matter how busy you are, no matter how much outside achievement you have, by the end of the day you have to take time for yourself.
I hope you enjoyed this presentation both audio and written. Now I need something from you.
Support Passion Rescue Mission by making a donation.
Subscribe to this podcast and leave a review. And don’t forget about sharing this podcast. I am sure you know at least one person who could benefit from the information shared here today.
Take control of your thoughts and attitudes with a, positive mindset. Get rid of ANTS, Automatic Negative Thoughts.
All that we are is the result of what we have thought. The mind is everything. What we think we become.” ~Buddha
Imagine your mind as a garden. Positive thoughts and a, positive mindset, are the beautiful flowers that brighten your life. Negative thoughts, are the ugly weeds that spread and suffocate your happiness, by cutting off sunlight. Just like plants we need sunlight to thrive.
Negative thoughts, can take the form of:
prophesying or any thought that makes you feel bad!
You need to kill the ANTS, Automatic Negative Thoughts
Automatic Negative thoughts of Fear –
Fear, is defined as False Events Appearing Real, is the number one reason that we don’t achieve success in this life. Fear, of the unknown, that feeling of uncertainty. Fear, is the bottom feeder of all the, negative emotions. When you are living in, fear, you feel very bad and you attract more bad things into your experience.
One way to Kill these, automatic negative thoughts, is to develop a, positive mindset. Imagine what is the worst that could happen and develop, positive thinking, about the outcome. Face the, fear, in your mind and say death where is your sting! Take it to your subconscious and dream about it. Once you face, fear, it loses its hold on you. Talk back to this, fear. Move up the emotional scale with anyone of the, negative emotions. Eg. You can become angry that your spouse is treating you a certain way, instead of being afraid of being alone if you left the relationship. See yourself alone and loving it.
There is also a positive side to this ANT.
If you are afraid of losing something be it your spouse, your job, your home; it tells you that these things are important to you and that you should do everything in your power to keep them. For example: if you fear losing your spouse, then you should work on keeping the marriage fresh, you should keep yourself attractive and don’t let yourself get to 300 lbs, serve your spouse and make him/her feel special.
Automatic Negative thoughts of Self-doubt
Lack of self-confidence is a very powerful, ANT. One of the most essential character traits to have is self-confidence. It is sexy and it allows you to command attention. When these, automatic negative thoughts, are telling you that you are not good enough; you will not get that promotion because you don’t have a degree, for example. Talk back to it and tell it that you are the best person for the job and that it is their loss if they don’t hire you. If you don’t, you will never move from where you are today. You will never be an over achiever or the top sales person on a team! You need self-confidence to achieve success.
Have a Positive mindset and get rid of Guilt –
Guilt, is a result of your conscience telling you that you have violated your own core value. It is telling you that you did something that is moving you away from your predetermined goal. You can talk back to these, automatic negative thoughts, by telling it that you have recognized your mistake and that you have forgiven yourself. Don’t let the, guilt, and shame arrest you and keep you in bondage. A lot of people wash away this guilt with drugs and alcohol.
Automatic Negative Thoughts of Anger –
Anger, ANTS, keep telling you that someone had no right to do something. The more you think about it, the angrier you get. Psychologists say that anger is like an iceberg. What you see is just the tip, that there is more ice for miles below the surface. If you are conscious that you have an, Anger problem, then you should understand (with the help of a Therapist) what is causing your anger. You can talk back to this, ANT, and tell it that you cannot control what someone else does; the only person you can control is yourself.
Automatic Negative Thoughts of Blame –
The blame, ANT, can be very destructive. When you blame others for the results you are having in your life, you assume the role of the victim. As the victim, you have no power to facilitate change. You talk back to this, ANT, by becoming a Player. As a Player you take back control. Regardless of what the dealer is showing, you can still win! You are not the product of your circumstances. Everyone has a story. It is how you handle adversity and challenges that define and grow you. In my book “Out of the Snares” I never blamed my childhood abuser. I instead chose to look at the positives I learned from that experience. Life is full of good and evil. Every evil person has a good side and every good person has an evil side.
Have a Positive Mindset and stop Prophesying –
The prophesying, automatic negative thoughts, talks to you about what it knows about the future! It tells you things like “you are never going to close that sale”. “The customer is going to string you along and they will never buy” or “it is never going to work out”. You can talk back to this, ANT, by declaring that IT cannot predict the future. It does not have a crystal ball!
Once you learn to recognize these, automatic negative thoughts, and learn to deal with them by sending them packing, then you can replace them with, Positive Thoughts. Positive thoughts, are like flowers, they beautify your garden and bring smiles to anyone who stops and pays attention to their beauty. In a similar way, positive mindset, make you beautiful to anyone who you have interpersonal relations with. But the beauty of a, positive mindset, is that they make you feel good. Like attracts like and before you know it, you have an abundance of good things becoming part of your experience.
I’ve seen firsthand how dangerous it is to let the weeds of, negative thinking, take over your mind. Just like in a natural garden, it you left the weeds unattended, they thrive more than the flowers or plants. In a similar way when you allow the, ANTS, to run free in your head; they snuff out all the joy from your life. All you then see is darkness, because they are blocking the sunlight from getting in!
In my book “Out of the Snares” I share with you, my readers, the principles of the Bible and the Universal Laws or Truths that I stood on to keep a, positive mindset. Order your copy today.https://myhelps.us/book-order/
The 9th Principle taught in my book “Out of the Snares, a story of hope and encouragement” is Love.
Love. This 4 letter word is so powerful! and, self love, is this love turned inside.
Love including, self love is the most powerful force in the universe!
It can break the bonds of years, sometimes generations of, addictions, and, generational curses.
God’s Love for Humanity
God’s love, for humanity caused him to send his only begotten son Jesus to die for our sins so that we can have everlasting life.
A mother’s love, for her child gives her superhuman strength, to save her child from death or injury.
The love we have for our wife and husband keeps off stress and diseases when that love is active and healthy.
You see when we are in the throes of our love experiences, we look at the world through rose colored glasses.
Everything is sunny. We stop to smell the roses.
Our hearts beat faster when our loved ones are near.
We ride the energy waves of this spiritual connection and in turn we feel energized, we smile and laugh more and we don’t sweat the small stuff!
The energy of love combined with, sexual energy, is even more powerful!
When you transmute, sexual energy, for the person you love, you can create or imagine life changing books, companies and inventions that propel humanity forward!
In order for you to give love to another you must first have, self love, inside of you.
You have to love yourself, you have to love your world or the space you work and play in your world.
You have to love God, your creator.
When you have, self love, you gain, self confidence
Self-confidence is necessary for you to be successful in your career and in your business
Click the link below to hear a powerful story of how lack of self-confidence can ruin your world. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8J1ECHTnc64
Love doesn’t have to be the Notebook kind with grand gestures and sacrifice.
We love to watch movies like the Notebook about true love that never dies.
We are inspired by stories about Edward, Prince of Wales and Wallace Simpson and how he chose love over the throne; but most of us would settle for the simple acts of love.
This artist depicts these acts in her paintings so wonderfully and every couple should aspire to connect on this level.
• Who wouldn’t love their spouse coming up and giving them a hug while they are cooking in the kitchen?
• Who wouldn’t love their spouse watching chick flicks with them and enjoying it as much as they do?
• Who wouldn’t love going out for ice cream and licking each other ice cream cones and stealing a kiss?
• Who wouldn’t love just being in a room and just enjoying each other, laying on your husbands lap while you read a book?
• Who wouldn’t like coming home and seeing your husband with a apron on in the kitchen cooking dinner?
Who wouldn’t have, self love, after all this.
Love shouldn’t be only for your spouse, children, family and friends. Love should be for all relationships in and out of the workplace, with customers, suppliers, everyone!
Giving love and compassion to the people you work with yields immense, self love.
Here are 5 ways to be a LoveCat at work with, self love:
1. Greet everyone who walks into your office or room with eye contact and a smile.
2. Hug your close associates or people you have a personal relationship at work.
3. Replace the word Hate with the word, self love, whenever you can and watch it transform the energy.
4. Read lots of books and offer the knowledge gained from these books to your co-workers to help them with projects, initiatives or difficult personal situations.
5. Start a book club at work and have everybody share cliff notes from the books read.
All in all, self love, is like a boomerang, it always comes back so give it freely.
It is like seeds that blow in the wind. It does not always come back from the people we choose to love; but it always comes back
Check out my chapter on Love in my book “Out of the Snares” A story of hope and encouragement.
Have you found your, passion? Passion, is that burning desire that God placed in your belly at birth. It is also called your burning bush.
In this episode I reference the Final chapter of my book “Out of the Snares, a story of Hope and Encouragement”
I call this chapter “God’s consuming fire your , passion.
In this chapter of my book “Out of the Snares, a story of hope and encouragement”I tell the stories of Walt Disney, Sylvester Stallone, and J.K Rowling. These are 3 examples of ordinary people who accomplished extraordinary things because they were able to convert their passion, the fire in their belly, into its monetary equivalent. Their passion was like a “burning bush” deep within their souls and they were driven to consummate this burning desire.
“The most powerful weapon on earth is the human soul on fire.”
Passion it is that thing that you were created to do. The thing that makes you feel good when you are doing it, like you transcended your body and entered the heavens. The thing that you would do all day for free.
Kobe Bryant was born with a purpose, he got the genes and the physical attributes to be a basketball player but; he had to engage his, passion.
Purpose is what you were placed on the earth to do, it is your contribution to mankind. The first way to uncover your, passion, is to find out what holds your interest and what you love doing. God gave you your gift of purpose, and you’re not always passionate about your purpose; but if you can marry it to your, passion, it’s like pouring gasoline on the fire. You have to feed your, passion. That’s what Kobe Bryant did and that is why he is a Legend. No one out worked him, he wanted to be the best and win championships.
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One of the self-evaluation questions I ask my new coaching clients is “If you were the Power-ball winner of $500,000,000. What would you do with your time?” You see, when you take away the need to earn money, then your head becomes clear as to what your passion really is.
In my book “Out of the Snares, a story of hope and encouragement”I tell the stories of Walt Disney, Sylvester Stallone, and J.K Rowling. These are 3 examples of ordinary people who accomplished extraordinary things because they were able to convert their passion, the fire in their belly, into its monetary equivalent. Their passion was like a “burning bush” deep within their souls and they were driven to consummate this burning desire.
For Walt Disney it was drawing and Art. Walt started drawing as an ambulance driver in the army. Then he became a commercial artist. After being let go from his company, he decided to start his own graphics company. His company failed from bad management. Walt had a string of failures that included bankruptcy before he found success. He married Art with imagination and created the happiest place on earth. His passion for drawing birth an empire that has gross revenues today in the billions of dollars.
Walt Disney World is now visited by over 5 million families every year, Annual cash flow from Disney’s consortium of products and films are in excess of 21 billion dollars. It includes 535 Disney stores, a cable television station, amusement parks in Orlando, California, Paris and more. All because he would not let the fire in his belly die.
So what would you do for free?
How did Sylvester Stallone Find his, Passion?
Sylvester Stallone was born disabled. He suffered injury at birth that left one side of his mouth deformed and caused him to speak funny. Sylvester’s passion was born from being hungry. Like Les Brown would say “You got to be Hungry” Sylvester was broke and hungry. He was walking the street one day, cold and hungry and he decided to go into a library to stay warm. Laying on the table was a book about a fighter who overcame odds to win. That inspired Sylvester Stallone to go write the Rocky story. He wrote that story in one sitting. He did not stop for 20 hours. That inspiration was the gasoline that lit the fire that God put inside him. Again he married passion with imagination and wrote a story that resonated with each and every one of us. The story of Rocky. It made him a millionaire many times over.
“When you set yourself on fire, people love to come and see you burn.”
— John Wesley
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Back in the day, Stallone was a struggling actor in every definition. At some point, he got so broke that he stole his wife’s jewelry and sold it. Things got so bad that he even ended up homeless. Yes, he slept at the New York bus station for 3 days. Unable to pay rent or afford food. His lowest point came when he tried to sell his dog at the liquor store to a stranger. He didn’t have money to feed the dog anymore. He sold his dog for $25. He says he walked away crying.
Two weeks later, he saw a boxing match between Mohammed Ali and Chuck Wepner and that match gave him the inspiration to write the script for the famous movie, ROCKY. He wrote the script in 20 hours! He tried to sell it and got an offer for $125,000 for the script. But he had just ONE REQUEST. He wanted to STAR in the movie. He wanted to be the MAIN ACTOR, Rocky himself. But the studio said NO. They wanted a REAL STAR.
They said he “Looked funny and talked funny”. He left with his script. A few weeks later, the studio offered him $250,000 for the script. He refused. They even offered $350,000. He still refused. They wanted his movie, but NOT him. He said NO. He was not selling out, if they did not cast him, they couldn’t buy his script. It worked. They wanted the script so badly, that they cast his as Rocky and history was made.
What is exactly the, Meaning of, Passion
Passion, is that which deeply stirs us or a developmental perspective, so it’s like the essence of our commitment. Passion is the thing that drives us. You might hear older individuals say they “lost their will to live,” that means they lost their passion, their fuel. Just like a child requires love to grow, we require passion to continue to grow inside.
When we selectively share our, passion, we engage the universe to manifest our, passion.
It’s like putting gasoline on your fire when you engaged your, passion.
How did J.K Rowling Find Her, Passion?
J.K Rowling was a single parent, a divorcee and out of work. On a train ride from Manchester to London she got the inspiration to create the Harry Potter story. But she was already a published author. Writing her first book at 6 years old and another at 11 years old. She became an English teacher because her passion was writing. Ms Rowling says
Failure stirs the fire in your belly to do something about your passion.
In 2015 J.K. Rowling’s 2008 Harvard commencement speech was published under the title ‘Very Good Lives: The Fringe Benefits of Failure and the Importance of Imagination’
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My, passion, is learning, building and imparting. As a Life coach, author and motivational speaker, I am constantly learning, building and imparting into the lives of others. I could do it all day and I do it for free.
Find your, passion!
“There is no greater thing you can do with your life and your work than follow your passions – in a way that serves the world and you.” Richard Branson
Dr Tra How can our listeners find their, Passion 2020?
What I encourage people to do is to focus on the positive at all times. If they remove the negative, those emotional vampires, they will let the light in. Once you move away or walk away or even run away from negativity, you can begin to find your, passion in 2020. Be passionate about whatever you desire, it doesn’t matter what it is, be passionate about it by surrounding yourself with those people who are similar in Life or those people who have already done it. I remember people talking about Diana Ross, one of my favorite people. They were so upset with her for continually surrounding herself around for White people, and she told them she surrounds herself with anyone regardless of color who is going in the same direction as she or where she wants to go.
The common complaint among a lot of people is that they need to, ‘find their passion.’
What is the difference between, Passion, and Emotion?
Hypnosis-Everywhere with Ines Simpson explores, dissects, discusses and opens up the world of Hypnosis. You will discover that Hypnosis is a very big world indeed. In Hypnosis-Everywhere, Ines offers you tools and answers to deal with that tricky mind of yours, and proven ways to enrich your life.
Fears, Anxieties, Phobias, PTSD, Body health, Mind Health, Spiritual Health are just some of the things Hypnosis works for. Hypnosis-Everywhere is a show about our minds and the miracles we can achieve for ourselves and each other
Did you start your New Year’s resolutions yet? I bet there’s one missing that you should add right now: find a greater sense of purpose in your life. To do that effectively, you need to understand the eight key components of living with purpose.
The new book, The Meaning of Life: A guide to finding your life’s purpose by Nathanael Garrett Novosel, is a complete step-by-step walkthrough of how humans derive meaning from their existence. This book helps you to identify what really matters to you in life, define a clear plan of going after what you want, and grow toward fulfilling your true calling.
Best of all, this book does not tell you how to live your life or which goals you should have. Instead, it helps you figure it out for yourself. ..That’s what you really want—someone in your corner helping you make sense of your life, not someone with their own agenda telling you what to do.
Childhood Abuse has continually been linked to substance abuse for women. In this Episode we look at, Drug and Alcohol treatment for women with trauma, who were abused by men and parents during childhood.
I interview Dr Tra Ahia who is the author of “Call me an Addict, War on Women”
She has been recognized as a champion of woman’s issues. Particularly women who have struggled to maintain a positive balance in their lives despite addiction. As the Therapist for women in Rehab for over 30 years, Dr Ahia was responsible for the, drug and alcohol treatments for women with trauma, who turned to substance abuse to as a means to cope with trauma. Her work in, addiction and recovery, began some thirty years ago and has empowered thousands of women as they transitioned to a healthy place in their lives. Dr Ahia’s research has been a motivating force in moving many broken women away from the men in their lives that lead them down the path of destruction, confusion, and addiction to a place where they are whole mentally, physically and emotionally with, drug and alcohol treatments.
In the book “Call me an Addict” Dr Ahia tells the brutal stories of 3 women. We will look at one of these women on the blog and podcast on the, Transform Your Mind radio and Podcast with Life Coach Myrna Young.
This is a summary Kelly’s story in the Book “Call me an Addict”
Kelly’s first memory at 2 years old was her father punching her in the face for not eating her food. Then she remembered at 5 years old taking her father’s fingers as she sat on his lap with his friends and sticking them in her vagina!
That was the start of her life that included sex with her father, an alcoholic and abusive mother, promiscuity with men at age 14.
At age 15 her parents gave her away to her boyfriend and moved to another city. She had her first child soon after and was homeless because the boyfriend also moved away to another city and left her to look after a child with no home and no income.
Another man gave her a place to live in return for sex. He ended up marrying her and they had 3 more kids.
Her abuse resulted in her abuse of alcohol and rehab. Her drug and alcohol treatment for women with trauma, was not successful. She continued to relapse.
Kelly started drinking heavily at 14 years old and used it for escape. It was drinking, sex, and prostitution.
Her story ended with her kids being placed in the custody of child protective services and she being placed in rehab for the 3rd time.
What was so sobering to me hearing this story was how 3 generations were ruined from addictions. Kelly’s father and mother were both addicts. She hated them both. She became an addict and then her eldest daughter followed her lifestyle. One of the most profound statements in the story to me was when Kelly said she and her daughter would fight all the time about who was the bigger whore!
As a Life Coach and survivor of child sexual abuse, I can say that the reason my life didn’t spin out of control like Kelly’s was because even before I knew anything about mindset and the power of intention, I wanted respect. I did not want to be known as a Bad Girl or whore. A girl who is free with sex and all the boys talk about her.
Kidtasks – the application of good deeds now available on Google Aps.
Kidtasks is an organizer for your children’s daily routines, but it is good for the entire family.
This is how it works.
1) Parents create a list of tasks. It could be as simple as “feed your pet”, “brush your teeth”, “water the plants”, “do the dishes”, etc.
Parents you can even rate each task in points.
2) Family members do the tasks on the list and get points!
3) Parents set your own exchange rate. Eg 1 point may be equal to 1$. Having collected a certain amount of points, the children may ask their parents for their “salary” for their work!
Why this AP useful for PARENTS: Because it will help to give Kids a sense of responsibility and prepare them for the things they need to do when they become older.
Why this AP is useful for CHILDREN: Children will be rewarded when they help out with chores around the house! They will have the opportunity to get a “salary” or pocket money in exchange for working on their tasks.
Parents, this AP will teach your children responsibility and reward them in the process. To download this AP head over to Google Aps and search for Kidtasks that’s K-I-D-T-A-S-K-S.
In my book “Out of the Snares, a story of Hope and Encouragement”, I share a similar story about my molester fingering me in his car as he drove me to school. I had the mindset to become a player in this game of life and not become a victim. You see victims have no power. Like Kelly she was powerless to stop her father from molesting her. In fact, another sobering part of her story was when she told her father “No” and he returned with the handle of a mop and stuck it up her ass. He told her with that move that she was nothing more than his bitch and he could do with her anything he wanted.
But we as women always have power!
Drug and Alcohol Treatment for Women with Trauma
Women are placed in Rehab facilities either by the Police, their families or sometimes they walk in on their own accord
Rehab facilities are an intensive in house process
As the in house Therapist my job was to administer, drug and alcohol treatments to these women with trauma, by helping them to learn from their addictions.
These Therapy sessions were conducted one on one and their, drug and alcohol treatments, were first understanding how they got to that point in their lives.
They first had to accept that they were addicts
These, drug and alcohol treatments for women with trauma, were 30 days to 6 months and sometimes even years
Most people including families do not understand that, drug and alcohol treatments for women with trauma, were not miracle drugs, these women were trying to get over abuse from their childhood. They can’t be cured in 6 months when they had these traumas for 10, 20 even 30 years.
After the intensive in house, addiction and recovery, treatments these women continue their, drug and alcohol treatments for women with trauma, in an half way house for about one year. In this house they are expected to remain clean, get jobs, practice self love and self care and become contributing members to their community.
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Here are some of the Symptoms from Childhood Sexual Trauma Resulting in Addiction.
PTSD is a mental health condition triggered by a traumatic event. Symptoms can emerge months or even years after the sexual trauma. Some common symptoms of PTSD include flashbacks, nightmares, intense distress when exposed to sights, sounds, or smells that trigger memories of the trauma, and bodily reactions when reminded of the trauma.
Dissociation, often associated with PTSD, is feeling disconnected or dissociated from one’s body. It can affect a person’s ability to focus, concentrate and function for periods of time. In an effort to detach from the sexual trauma, people learn to numb themselves from the pain. Dissociation is often referred to as avoidance coping, because survivors use it as a mechanism to escape and pull away from their past.
The Road to Recovery
The recovery from sexual trauma is a healing journey that takes time. Children who have been traumatized by sexual abuse often report feelings such as shame, terror, depression, and guilt. They often blame themselves for the abuse. Although drugs and alcohol can give survivors a moment of reprieve, there are dangerous risks and high costs to that emotional escape.
Sexual abuse not only leaves emotional and psychological scars, but it can lead to dangerous risk-taking behaviors, like using drugs. Substances are only a temporary fix and they can’t erase the past. Fortunately, dark moments don’t have to last, and drugs don’t have to cover unhealed wounds. Survivors can learn healthy coping skills and become a beacon of encouragement and hope to other youth who travel a similar path toward healing.
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Additional Resources for Drug and Alcohol Treatments for Women with Trauma
So What’s the secret to, living the life of your dreams? Have you wondered how someone can be born with nothing, and then live a, dream life? They can live in abject poverty, having nothing to eat, sometimes homeless and in a few years become a millionaire?
In this episode of the Transform your mind, to Transform your Life, radio show and podcast, registered social worker and mental health counselor, Ms Arifah Yusuf Mortley, share what we believe is the secret to, living the life of your dreams. Arifah is the founder and Program Director of Lifted by Purpose, a company that Provides a diverse range of services including workshops or programs designed to help the youth in Toronto, Canada deal with mental health issues, make positive changes in their lives after issues with the criminal justice system. Arifah has been a registered social worker specializing in mental health for over 15 years. She just started working with the prison system to help inmates live fulfilling lives when released from prison.
There are more, rags to riches, stories than rich kids born with trust funds.
A young boy was born into poverty in a rundown section of San Francisco. This young boy became a fan of football legend Jim Brown, then the running back for the Cleveland Browns. Even though this young boy was crippled by Rickets from malnutrition, he dreamed of one day becoming a star running back like his hero Jim Brown.
Since he had no money to pay to see his hero play, he would wait outside the stadium for the maintenance crew to open up the gate in the fourth quarter and he would hobble on his crocked legs into the stadium and watch the balance of the game.
At the age of 13, he walked into an ice cream parlor one day after a 49’rs game against the Browns and came face to face with his idol, Jim Brown.
He went up to him and said “Mr Brown I Am your biggest fan. I know every record you’ve ever set, every touch down you’ve ever scored. Mr Brown one day I am going to break every one of your records.”
Jim Brown smiled and said “That great Kid. What’s your name?”
The young boy smiled and said “Orenthal James Simpson my friends call me O.J”
O.J Simpson did indeed go on to break all of Jim Brown’s records proving that, whatever you water will grow, and that, energy goes where attention flows.
Arifah what is your experience as a counselor with youth transforming their lives from nothing to something?
I think the story is very powerful in terms of sharing his lived experiences with adversity and having a mindset from an early age to be great. Being able to meet his mentor, the person that he looked up to was also a great moment in his life. I admire that he not only set a goal to be like his hero Jim Brown but he wanted to surpass him.
I know that’s the same even with me working with young people often when you’re in your situation sometimes you feel stuck but then if you take the moment to look at it and be like well if I feel like this is the worst situation for me the only way to go is up from here.
The best thing to do is to reflect on your situation, then look at your strengths and look at how you use those strengths. Ask yourself how do I use those resources around me to get where I need to go. Then you can definitely work towards transforming your life.
I have a story of a young person. He was referred to me by another social worker. This young man was always in and out of incarceration. I was working on a peer support project with young people sharing their lived experiences and the learning from these experiences with other young
People. This young man was awaiting trial for a new charge and while he was working in the program, he developed a lot of skills. He learned to tell his story and self- reflect on some of his challenges.
One day his story connected with another youth and the youth told him his story changed his life. That made him feel like a leader. He became inspired to help more youths in the program.
He graduated from our program, got a job in trades work and when he came out of prison got a full time job at a top company. Today he is a supervisor, making good money and supporting his family.
As a, Life coach, I know for a fact that if you keep watering your goals with your attention and have faith and perseverance, you will one day manifest them into your experience and soon you will be, living the life of your dreams.
As a gift to my radio and podcast audience I want to give you a free copy of my book Out of the Snares, a story of hope and encouragement.
My purpose in writing this book was to share with my readers the secret to, living the life of your dreams . This book is my testimony that who you seek is seeking you.
All my life I have been called lucky; but there is no such thing as luck just positive energy and preparation.
As women we sometimes fail because we are always working; but not On their lives. We instead work in our lives. To succeed your commitment to your own personal growth must parallel your commitment to building remarkable lives for yourself and your children.
After you read my book and become inspired by my story of success after starting out with nothing, I would like to Help you get off the starting block with the most unbelievable coaching offer ever made!
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So how do you transform your current lack of resources, love, energy, or just a miserable existence to, Living the Life of your Dreams?
I am a follower of Ester Hicks and the consciousness of Abraham. I believe that The universe responds to whatever you focus on. You could be laying in bed with a broken body or in a broken relationship and you could shift your reality to where you want to be and that would become your new point of attraction.
If you were to focus on what you don’t have, you are in fact activating it to continue in your life. Eg If you focus on your lack of money or the lack of a man that is what you will continue to have.
Arifah what are some exercises or steps you help your clients to live a, Life of their dreams ?
I focus on a strength-based assessment. This assessment helps young people recognize their strengths or skills abilities and the things that they’re good at doing. We made a list of things that he was good at. Some of the things that he profited from illegally; but skills like marketing, figuring out demographics, leadership, acquiring a team. The skills were transferable into other things.
Then we figured out what jobs matched the skills he was good at. For example, he was good with his hands so we looked at construction jobs or trade jobs like plumbing.
Once we listed the jobs that he had an aptitude for, then it was just connecting him to those Resources. We looked for friends or family members who worked in that industry. We made a resource list of who he knew and where they worked.
Then we looked at what steps would he have to take to apply or what skills was needed for each job. After this process, he became a little bit more hopeful. He started to approach the problem with a positive mindset and a strategy.
My youth are able to find the perfect job and start, living the life of their dreams.
Here are the, Life coaching, steps to, Living the Life of Your Dreams
As a Life coach I ask my clients to utilize their imagination.
To withdraw their attention from the negative vibration of their current situation and dream.
Our brains can’t tell the difference between real or imagined images.
Launch their creation of their abundant life by launching their desires into the universe. Think of OJ Simpson.
Become pure positive energy like a breath of fresh air
Everyone has something they can be grateful for even if it is feeling the warmth of the sun on your skin or being able to walk in the rain. Do you know that people in prison would give anything to feel the sun or walk in the rain. Positive vibration attracts positive things and circumstances into your experience.
Control where your awareness goes within your mind because that is where your energy flows.
Learn the fine art of concentration
Concentration is defined as holding your awareness on one thing.
Do you remember the book and movie the secret?
It was about the Law of attraction and creating vision boards and everyone in the movie had their vision come true. Everyone was living the, like of their dreams.
So what’s the secret to, living the life of your dreams? “Believe, have faith and persevere”
God said I know the plans I have for you. Plans to prosper you and give you hope.
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My pastor taught a sermon on, brokenness, a few months back, and he made the analogy of a, broken, vase. He said that a, broken, or cracked vase cannot hold any content, everything leaks out. We must heal our, brokenness if we are going to hold love, self-esteem, self-worth, or confidence.
Certified Life coach, Myrna Young and registered social worker, Arifah Yusaf discuss, How to Heal your Brokenness,
The LORD is near to the, broken hearted, And saves those who are crushed in spirit.
My pastor taught a sermon on, brokenness, a few months back, and he made the analogy of a, broken, vase. He said that a, broken, or cracked vase cannot hold any content, everything leaks out. That means that if you are, broken hearted,
you cannot hold love,
you cannot hold appreciation,
you cannot hold compliments,
you are incapable of receiving and holding anything.
So it is very important for us to find our cracks and mend them. As, minority women, most of us have experienced some, brokenness, in our lives.
Here are the top 3 reasons for, Brokenness:
Devalued and rejected by others
Abandoned by our parents
Feelings of not being good enough because we have lack.
How do we Heal, brokenness?
I know in our practice of social work and in psychology, a lot of clinical professionals, look at the research study around ACES which is our first childhood experiences.
That study basically states that childhood experiences before the age of 18, whether that be witnessing abuse or being abused themselves, living in poverty or just going through traumatic events; Those experiences impact their, brokenness, as they grow up into adulthood. It may impact how they maneuver through success or how they view themselves as failures.
These experience are also linked to risky health behaviors, chronic health conditions, low life potential and even early death.
Myrna Young, Life Coach, I agree that risky behaviors from, brokenness, usually means an absence of self-love and that can definitely lead to early death.
I am going to niche down in our conversation today to address women of color and, minority women, because that’s who we are.
As women we can be, broken, both in our childhood and by narcissistic men in our adult lives, who have rejected us or devalued us.
Our, brokenness, becomes compared with the, broken hearted. Also when we experience, brokenness, as children those experiences can leads us to get into unhealthy relationships. Healing our, brokenness, prevents us from repeating this pattern of unhealthy relationships that would leave us, broken hearted.
It takes work to heal our cracks. The first step in coaching is to identify how you became, broken, and then replace your subconscious programming with a new program similar to writing over a CD disk.
How to heal the, Broken Hearted
Acknowledge that you are, broken
Follow the pain – pay attention to where it hurts
Trust outside eyes. Have close trusted friends to tell you what they see. This can also be a, life coach, who can uncover your blind spots.
Allow love to mold you like the potter molds clay.
Pray and meditate on the fruits of the spirit, peace, joy, love
Here is a story on, How we become broken, and the process of healing.
Arifah – In my years of practice, I obviously had a lot of opportunities to engage young people who have expressed feeling, broken, based on their lived experiences or their adverse childhood experiences. As we talked about earlier in the segment, those experiences impact how they view themselves, how they show up in relationships, in their place within society or their environments.
I recall speaking with this young woman who shared witnessing domestic abuse at home. She actually found her mother’s body when she came home from school one day. She was then placed into the foster care system. At 18 years old having nowhere to go, she was placed into a shelter. I remember her telling me that she really struggled with her identity and her self-esteem. She harbored resentment towards her family because nobody had come to claim her in Foster care which magnified her, brokenness.
In her late teens she became pregnant and wanted to connect with her family; because she was starting to feel isolated and she wanted her child to know more about her family history. But she faced rejection once more. She decided that it was all up to her, to make a difference in her child’s life.
She then stared setting small goals for herself and accomplishing them. That started building her self-esteem until she recovered from her, brokenness. She became more engaged in her community and connected with other single mothers. She stopped blaming others or comparing herself to others and continued her healing process.
She decided to develop a plan with a network of positive healthy people. Eventually she stopped defining herself as, broken, because she realized that she really could make a difference in the life of her child. It was all up to her, no one else. Like the analogy of the broken vase, she couldn’t hold self-esteem, or self-worth, as a broken vessel, everything leaked out. When she became whole everything stayed in. That is, how to heal your brokenness,
My purpose in writing this book was to share with my readers the power of intention as the energy in my life. This book is my testimony on how I overcame my, brokenness.
All my life I have been called lucky; but there is no such thing as luck just positive energy and preparation.
As women we sometimes fail because we are always working; but not On their lives. We instead work in our lives. To succeed your commitment to your own personal growth must parallel your commitment to building remarkable lives for yourself and your children.
After you read my book and become inspired by my story of success after starting out with nothing and healing my, brokenness, I would like to Help you get off the starting block with the most unbelievable coaching offer ever made!
If you are interested in doing something remarkable with your life and escape the Snares of failure from, broken relationships, broken marriages, by moving your dreams from your head into your hands, then download your FREE book and purchase my coaching package.
You will never get a better chance to invest in you. I believe that you are worth it. Don’t you?