How to Write Your Own Hollywood Ending

Hollywood ending life story

A lot of times if you believe it and pray about it your, Hollywood movie, will turn out exactly the way that you want it to be. If we use our imagination, we can create our, Hollywood ending. Think of that bad job you are in and create your, Hollywood movie, with your own, Hollywood ending with you in your dream job, in your dream relationship and your dream family.  First you must have the baseline of, self-awareness, then you use your imagination to write the script. Where do I want to get to, what’s my goal?  You are the Director, Producer and star of your Life Movie.

My guest today is Linda Flanders, Author of “Hollywood Endings and How to Get One”

Years ago, my pastor preached a message that when we’re born there is a blank page.  We have a beginning, and we have an ending and in the middle we are supposed to write our story. We are the director of our life movie, producer and the Star in our, Hollywood ending.

Listen to the full interview Here 

Writing your Hollywood Ending

Yes, you can create what you want with imagination an intention. The movie themes the world loves are few and simple; they are the themes that have been portrayed over and over since Hollywood began to make movies. These classics have the most wonderful endings: love overcomes all; good defeats evil; the wayward child comes home. Anyone can be a hero, and everyone has a Guardian Angel.

Hollywood Endings – Using Imagination and Intention is about self-awareness, recovery and enlightenment. It’s for anyone who has ever wanted or dreamed of having a “Hollywood ending.” It is for those of us who never had a role model to show us how it’s done. It celebrates the wonder of the movies and urges us to see movies once to be entertained, and then return to see them again to learn from them. We all deserve a Hollywood ending. This book can show you how with life lessons from Dances With Wolves, National Velvet, Die Hard, and The Color Purple, to name a few.

Book: Hollywood endings How to get one
Book: Hollywood endings How to get one

Rewrite your own story and give it a Hollywood ending.

Linda has been a, FeldenKrais, practitioner for 30 years and an independent video producer. Flanders and her sister Dr Dorothy Halla-Poe created the, matrix model, an innovative way to work with children’s atypical behavior and, learning disabilities.  They specialized in using the, filmmaking, process as a learning and teaching tool, focusing on projects that are educational and promote social and personal change.

Myrna – I love the idea of using the, Hollywood movie, and, filmmaking, process as a learning tool to help children with, learning disabilities.  Can you share how that works.

Linda – I am a, Feldenkrais, practitioner and have been for 30 years and while that particular mode of learning has to do with learning, self-awareness, and learning through options.  I started working with young children who needed physical therapy and occupational therapy; but their behavior was such that they were absolutely out of control and scared the, physical therapist, on the, occupational therapist.

I started working with children behavior focusing specifically on self-awareness and self-control. If we have those two things, we can pretty much guide our own, Hollywood ending. If we do not have them, then we are vulnerable to so many awful things that can happen in our life.  If we cannot control ourselves and become the, Director, in our own, Hollywood movie, somebody else is going to control us.

 

I started using making, movies, as a fun activity with children and what I found was that even with multiple, psychiatric labels, attached to them and very bizarre behaviors, they all listened to the, director, if they played a part in a, movie.

 

When they had a camera in their face and the, director, said do this; they did it without hesitation. No attitude or behavioral issues. The children also loved watching themselves over and over in their, Hollywood movie. Science has shown that kids watching themselves act a certain way reinforces new neural pathways in their brain of new behavior.

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The, Feldenkrais method, is an educational way of learning to teach self-awareness.

Myrna – I understand the behavioral piece in making a, Hollywood movie; but I don’t understand how making a, movie, helps children with, learning disabilities.

Linda – In making our, Hollywood movie, I had them freeze for the camera while I ran around with the camera to a different angle, because that’s how a, Hollywood movie,  is made.

The children had to be in the, present moment, and they had to control themselves from the inside out. That is the huge piece of, self-control, and if they can gain, self-control, then they’ve got a better opportunity in school to be able to learn the different topics that they needed to learn.

In making a, Hollywood movie, they became much more aware of themselves and what they could do and what they couldn’t do. When they fell apart and got angry or sad or wanted to be the star of the, Hollywood movie, those issued had to be worked out during the filming of the, movie.

Myrna – That’s great and innovative. I hope teachers who are listening will take some cues from you because now we all can make, Hollywood movies, with our cell phones!

Hollywood Endings and How to Get One

Let’s transition into your book.  You wrote the book “Hollywood Endings and How to Get One” Tell us what would you like the readers to walk away with after reading your book.

Linda – Absolutely, it is a, self-help book, or a, self-improvement book. It teaches, mindfulness, helps with raising, self-awareness, on topics like “are you happy” “are you content with your job” etc.

The book teaches the science of, mindfulness, of paying attention to the moment, so you are fully present. In the science world this is called, neuroplasticity.  Change your brain, change your life.

If we use our imagination, we can create our, Hollywood ending. You think of that bad job you are in and create your, Hollywood movie, with your own, Hollywood ending. First you must have the baseline of, self-awareness, then you use your imagination to write the script. Where do I want to get to, what’s my goal?

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Your Hollywood Ending doesn’t have to be romantic

The idea of the, Hollywood ending, is not necessarily a romantic one, it could be any goal you have. If you reach that goal that’s a, Hollywood ending.

Myrna – When you were talking my mind went directly to the, Hollywood movie, Pretty Woman.

The movie started with the words, Hollywood, where dreams were made, anything is possible in, Hollywood! It ended with the same words.

But in the movie specifically Julia Roberts had a dream. She had a dream of her own, Hollywood ending.   She actually told Richard Gere in the movie hey “all the time I was dreaming you about my Prince Charming, I would dream I would be locked up into this room in this castle and the prince would climb up and he would rescue me. Nowhere in my, Hollywood ending, did he say I’m going to put you up in a condo as my mistress.

It’s really true, if you’ve got a goal and you’ve got a dream of your movie of life having a, Hollywood ending, it’s very hard for someone to knock you off of it.  Which is why she didn’t accept that offer which she said was a good offer for a girl like her.

She had gained, self-awareness, in that whole process of being a highly paid call girl for a week.

Linda – In the book I do explain the three systems of the brain.  I’m not a, neuroscientist;  but the information’s out there,  I  simply simplified it.

The Brain Systems

  1. The producer brain, because without a producer you don’t have a, Hollywood movie. The producer brain is the, reptilian brain, and that keeps us breathing. It keeps our heart beating. So, we don’t have a lot of control over that one
  2. The, limbic system, is the home of the emotions and we can live there we can, but we can also get stuck there. You can become a drama queen always reacting to life instead of working in the direction we want to go.
  3. The cerebral cortex, the Director brain. That’s where we plan, where we use our own judgment, where we use our common sense, our reasoning.

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There’s another movie that Julia Roberts was in called “Sleeping with the Enemy” where she is in a very abusive domestic violence situation.  I talk about that movie in my book, because if you can’t leave a situation, you can watch that movie and get ideas to leave your situation.

In the, Hollywood movie, she planned her escape. She learnt to swim, she selected her disguises so her husband could not find her, she picked a place that she would live. She imagined her, Hollywood ending. She set all the pieces in order first, then she made her escape and that’s what I’m teaching in the book.  We could use, Hollywood movies, and our imagination to write our own, Hollywood ending.

Myrna – So you want readers to walk away with the vision that they can direct their lives. They can plan it out, they can be a director, the producer of their own lives, because their life is like a, Hollywood movie.

Linda – Yes, each chapter there is a list of a few things to do. The first one is go watch a, Hollywood movie, but I want you to watch this movie through this lens, so that you’re watching the movie from a different perspective.  You’re gaining awareness from watching that movie. For example in the, Hollywood movie, Die Hard, with Bruce Willis.

In that movie there are places where Bruce Willis is so emotionally distraught, that he’s not thinking.  He throws some C4 down an elevator chute without recognizing that it’s gonna explode and where’s that explosion gonna come?  It’s gonna come right back up the chute into his face. That’s an example of us doing something without thinking of the consequences which blows up in our face.

Myrna – I don’t know much about movies or directing, but I know as a, Life coach, I always teach that we’re the director of our own lives, because we make the decisions and direct our choices.

What is the FeldenKrais Method

One of the things within, Feldenkrais model, is taught through movement.  We teach awareness, options and choice, but these lessons are taught through the avenue of movement.  One of the classic lessons in the, Feldenkrais, community is called a pelvic clock. It’s the ability to get your pelvis moving in all the different directions of a clock.  It’s better to be able to move a little bit in all these directions than a whole lot just one way, so it’s definitely the opposite of one-way thinking.

In my work with children I teach them how to create a clock from clay. They have to make the clock and they have to make the one, two, three, four all the way to twelve.  Then they have to make a little person and put the person in the center of the clock.  The idea what if you altered your behavior just a little bit. Just a little bit to move to the next number on the clock.  Step by step by step. You don’t have to stop doing something just change it a little bit.

It could be drug use, overeating or alcohol in adults. The idea is its okay if you can’t completely stop drinking but can you cut back a little bit with awareness. If you can’t make a small change, then you become aware that you have a real problem.

It’s this intertwining of movement and thinking with our emotions that get tied up in this knot and through the Feldenkrais method of movement and awareness you can break those up and then make small changes.  Transformation comes faster because you’ve incorporated movement as well as thinking and emotions.

FeldenKrais Method uses movement to achieve change 

Myrna – Yes that is the mind and body connection as taught in Yoga.

Linda – If we want to become the director in our own, Hollywood movie, then this is simply a way that we can do it.  Shakespeare said that “the whole world is a stage and we’re just actors on it”

Myrna – In this day and age everybody’s got a camera, people are making big money just recording on their smart phones. You do not need the big fancy movie camera to record your own, Hollywood movie.

 

Free Feldenkrais Summit

From May 1st through May 10th there is a free online Feldenkrais summit that you want to invite our listeners and TV audience.

It’s an international summit, so for those whole two weeks you have presentations that come from, Feldenkrais, practitioners around the world who have taken their work and specialized in it.  You can learn about using this method to help with trauma. There is trauma from anyone who is victimized and has been traumatized.

Some have taken, Feldenkrais, into working with world-class athletes and top performers.

Some have taken it literally into working with animals. Linda Tellington Jones can do amazing things with animals.

I took it into behavior, so it could be applied in a whole bunch of different ways.

So, the summit has all these different international speakers. It is literally 24 hours of

Feldonkrais, awareness through movement.

It’s all free so it’s an opportunity for people to experience the, Feldenkrais method, and break up those muscular patterns so you can feel better. Because when you move better, you can feel better.

 

Register on www.feldenkraissummit.com

Conclusion

In closing a, Hollywood movie, I am going to suggest everybody go watch the, Hollywood movie, Baby Boom with Diane Keaton because in an instant she a New York executive and literally overnight she becomes a single parent of a toddler who had lost her parents.

She took the circumstances of her life and created her own, Hollywood ending.

It you found this content inspirational, Please remember to subscribe and leave a review on iTunes.  You are invited to join my private Facebook Group called “Lifecoach

Additional Resources

 

How to Find Success in Online Dating During COVID 19

Anwar White online dating coach

Online dating, during COVID 19 is happening the same way as online purchases and e-commerce. During the last year we have been buying most of everything online. Dating and relationship coach, Anwar White says for his clients, dating apps, are the primary way that they are meeting future partners or just, dating, in general. That’s going to be the case after, COVID 19, when things open back and we can date in person again.  I thing like e-commerce, 20% of people will remain on, dating apps.

I would like to welcome my newest audience which on the Preach the Word Worldwide Television Network.

Today we have an exciting topic for all you single ladies and single men out there.  We are going to be talking on the topic of How to Find Success Dating during COVID 19.

Listen to the full interview Here:

 

My guest today is dating and, relationship coach, Anwar White.  Anwar is going to share tips on, online dating, during these unprecedented times of, COVID 19, where everything is remote. Single women, can’t meet their date in person.

We want to include some information on, Christian dating.  The bible says in second Corinthians:

Do not be unequally yoked which means that Christians should look for partners in, marriage, where both of them share the same beliefs and practices such as praying, reading the bible and going to church.

Dating Tips on How to Get Your Guy

Myrna – Tell us your journey to becoming, dating coach, and podcast Host of the “How to Get Your Guy”. I guess the, dating, conversation is towards women.

Anwar – My name is Anwar White, and I have been helping the boys talk to the girls and the girls talked to the boys ever since elementary school.  I started doing this work as a, dating coach, when catching up with my female classmates and found out everything was going well in their life except for love.

It was so crazy to me because these women were the most amazing women. Well educated, beautiful and successful and yet they could not find a man.  So, I told them I’m taking over your love life! I slowly started working with a variety of my former classmates and we had lot of really great success. They were having boyfriends very quickly and they were getting married within two years.

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Helping Women of Color Date Effectively

I got certified as a, relationship coach, and started working with thousands of women and men all around the world.  I don’t want your listeners to think I focus just on women.

I am very focused on how men are thinking about, dating, and, relationships, as well.  So  I’ve been doing my own thing as an entrepreneur and coaching women all around the world, specifically, women of color.  Smart, successful, women of color, on how to heal their heart, how to date effectively and then, How to Get Their Guy, on my podcast.

Myrna -It sounds like you were born with the aptitude for this work because when people start doing things earlier on in life, it is usually their purpose. We are experiencing huge growth on, dating apps, and the, online dating, world During, COVID 19, pandemic. Do you think the, dating, world will be forever changed after, COVID 19?

Is online Dating Here to Stay

Anwar – I think about, online dating, the same way I think about online purchases and e-commerce. During the last year we have been buying most of everything online. I know for the clients that I work with, dating apps, is the primary way that they are meeting future partners or just, dating, in general. That that’s going to be the case after, COVID 19. When things open back and we can date in person again, I thing like e-commerce, 20% of people will remain on, dating apps.

It’s crazy because it’s similar in terms of, online dating.  Roughly 20% of, relationships, came from, online dating, right now that looks like a little bit more like 40 to 50%.

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How can one find success dating during COVID 19

Anwar- It depends on what their definition of success means. For some marriage is not their end goal, they just want to connect with someone. My clients have different wants and desires.  The other thing that I wanted to about success in, online dating, is specifically during this time is that we have the time to self-reflect and to have more self-awareness.

You have to bring your whole entire self to this, love game, or you’re not going to be successful. If you’re you not addressing the things that you have been avoiding or ignoring or ashamed of and you’re hiding those parts of yourself, then people are not really getting to know you or able to love you fully.  So, take this time to address and heal some of those things so that when they are meeting their person, they can be ready to be the best partner that they can be.

Myrna – Do you think that people can do self-reflection themselves or they’re hiring a, dating coach, like you for instance.

Hiring a Dating Coach Helps you become your best self

Anwar –  Some are hiring a, dating coach, I think the coaching industry has exploded. People have had the time and space to sit back, exhale and be like oh I’m not happy about these things.  Instead of working and doing that rat race.

Coaches can help you with those blind spots to accelerate that work and potentially that healing to get you to your goal faster.

Myrna – 95% of us are not living conscious lives which means that they can’t sit down and self-evaluate or see their blind spots.

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What are the top, dating, mindset shifts that are critical to successful, Online dating?

Anwar – I think there are a couple of things when I think about kind of mindset shifts when it comes to, dating. First is a lot of people try to date their clone, someone who’s just like them.  If I am from the Caribbean and I am a Christian and I work in IT, that is who they want to partner with.

I have a really great success rate in terms of getting my clients partnering with someone who is not their clone. I think it’s important for us to realize that we have to be more open-minded when it comes to, dating, and realize that it’s not about what their resume or what their paper looks like; it’s really about how they’re making me feel.

I work with smart and successful women.  My clients are Harvard educated and most of them has a list of the things they want in a man. We have to shift our mindset around, you had an amazing time with this person.

On the men’s side it’s about really how she looks and how seductive she is and her

curvature and all of that, so we have to think beyond that and really focus in on the things that are going to fulfill us from a long-term perspective, because chemistry is short lived.

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Is Compatibility more important than Chemistry in Dating?

Another mindset shift that I want us to be thinking about is, compatibility vs chemistry.  How we how we vibe, how we connect, how we mesh.  I always think of, compatibility, is. Can we make a thousand decisions in one day together?  Because that’s really what being a really in a, relationship, is all about.  You must be able to be on the same page on a lot of different subjects.

The mindset shift is about prioritizing, compatibility, over, chemistry. I think a lot of people are focused on the, chemistry, when they’re, dating, and not the, compatibility.  The, chemistry, is those butterflies in my stomach.  Chemistry, chemically fades within 18 months from our body and then all you are left with is, compatibility.

When you look at, divorce rates, those first two years are so crucial, because often times what happens is that, chemistry, starts to fade during that time.

Dating Advice on Finding the Right Guy

If you’re a woman out there and you want a guy that is making six figures that’s great; but that’s only nine percent of the population.

  • If you want a guy who is six feet tall, that’s good; but that’s roughly eight percent of the population
  • If you want a man with a graduate degree that’s six percent of people out there
  • If you want someone who owns their own home that’s 20% of the population.
  • Multiply all of that together you actually have a one percent chance of finding your guy and that’s not even taking into account if that person likes you back.

You must know how this, love game, works. Nine out of the ten people that you meet are not going to be the one. Knowing the numbers ahead of time saves your heart and saves any of the mental chatter, you know of the stories that you tell yourself.  The ones that don’t serve you, I am not good enough, I will never meet the right guy.

Additional Resources

Are you waiting on Love? How Single Women over 40 Find Love

 

The Power of Intention – Seven ways to Access Energy

Power of intention

The, power of Intention, is defined as a strong purpose or aim to fulfill your dreams. This power is an invisible force of, energy, in the Universe activating the, law of attraction.  We access this force when we become inspired; dormant forces come alive in us and propel us towards our goals. That force is called, the Power of Intention.

Don’t wait to fall through a hole to experience a new world, be deliberate about your life; intentionally create the world you want to live and play in.

Every baby is born with a purpose, every baby is pure intention. Even before the Seed is matched with the Egg; the, Power of Intention, sets in motion what you will physically look like at your birth. Your height, your bone structure, the color of your eyes and your non-physical attributes are also predetermined; ie your personality, how you will handle stress and your emotional IQ etc.

Babies are born with the potential to walk, speak, read, and do mathematics. Nothing is left to chance. It’s possible to locate which areas of the brain that will eventually produce these abilities, but until then, they exist as pure, power of intention, and potentials and intentions.

” I knew you before I formed you in your mother’s womb.  Before  you were  born I set you apart and appointed you as my prophet to the nations” ~~~Jeremiah 1:5

Here are  3 ways to access, the Power of Intention, energy field

  1. The spoken word – is a powerful tool, by levering our voice we expand our dreams from internal thoughts to external possibilities. So speak freely of your dreams and visions. By verbalizing your thoughts out loud you are empowering your dreams to the universe. You are entering the field of all possibilities and activating, the power of intention. This is the predominant reason that coaching works. Inside the coaching conversation, you are speaking your goals and vision, sometimes for the first time.
  1. Controlling your Thoughts – Wayne Dyer power of intention, when you are aware of the company you keep in your head, you take back control of your life by being present in the present moment. The friends in your head in the form of your thoughts, determines where you end up in life. Just like when we were kids and our parents told us not to keep company with certain kids because they would be a bad influence; in the same way if we keep company with negative thoughts, they become a bad influence.
  2. Your parents did not know why but they knew that if you hung around bad kids then no good will come of you. In a similar way if you keep replaying negative emotions, doubt, worry, insecurities, getting even, discontent, fear, blame in your head then no good will come of you.  The first step in activating, Wayne Dyer power of intention, is becoming conscious of your thoughts. Once you bring these thoughts from subconscious to consciousness, then you take back control.
Power of intention
Power of intention
  1. Verbalize your vision – What you do and what you say are very important. Out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks. When we declare our intentions to the Universe, we set the, energy, fields in motion. The bible teaches that words are carriers. Words carry the spirit of the person speaking. Spirit is the highest form of, energy. To access the, energy,  field of the, Power of Intention, and, the Secret, we need to become aware of our, energy, levels.

Discover who you are and live your life on purpose!  ~~~Dolly Parton

 

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There are five, energy levels, in the field of, power of intention:

  • 1: The material world – it is energy slowed down so we can see form
  • 2: The sound world – faster energy. We can sometimes feel sound vibrations.
  • 3: The light world – when the high energy of light meets with the low energy of darkness; the darkness becomes light. In the same way when we keep our energy levels high, the low energy fields of doubt, depression, obstacles etc. cannot reach us because our light converts the low energy fields of negative emotions.
  • 4: Our thoughts – the, energy,  of our thoughts are higher than light and sound. This is the foundation for the movie, the Secret. Every thought we have can be calculated to see if it has the positive energy to access the, power of intention, or the negative energy of doubt that impedes our forward movement and progress. That’s, the Secret, of the, Law of Attraction.
  • 5: The energy of spirit – The highest level of, energy, is that of spirit. Spirit is the, energy, force of Creation.  Kindness, Beauty, Love, Expansion are also forms of spirit energy.

Make raising your, energy, levels a priority in life. Low, energy, is an attractor pattern. If you practice raising your, energy, then you will not attract low, energy, forms like depression, blame, loneliness, shame, anxiety etc.

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Power of Intention conscious Discipline

  1. Becoming conscious of your thoughts using the, power of intention conscious discipline.
  2. Make meditation a regular practice. Meditation allows us to make conscious connection with our source. It also allows  us to make conscious connection with our emotions, so that we develop discipline.
  3. Use the, power of intention conscious discipline, to become conscious of the foods we eat. Processed foods lower our energy, while fruits, vegetables and greens raise our energy levels. Drugs and alcohol including prescription drugs also lowers your energy levels. Retreat from drugs and alcohol even prescription drugs.
  4. Becoming conscious of the music you listen to. Rock and Heavy metal music lowers your, energy levels, while soft music about love, and classical music raises your energy levels.
  5. Becoming aware of the energy in your home. Feng Shui  is the art of choosing the right furnishings and accessories then arranging these  furnishings  to increase the positive  energy in your home.  Accessories can include paintings or photography.
  6. Photographs of your loved ones smiling and laughing in happier times, photographs expressing love or showcasing nature also raise your energy levels. You should also become conscious of the energy from relationships in your home. Tension and strife in your home not only lowers your, energy levels; but it debilitates you. We cannot excel in any area in life, if we are not happy at home.
  7. Immerse yourself in nature- experiencing the beauty of nature is a purely spiritual experience. The energy of spirit is the highest level attainable in the, universal laws.
  8. Commit to helping people in need. Acts of kindness expecting nothing in return raises your, energy levels, because kindness, compassion and service are spiritual experiences and the highest of the energy states. The beauty of kindness and giving expecting nothing in return is that you get that energy back in spades.
  9. The Bible teaches that in giving the tithe to God,” the windows of Heaven are opened and blessings pour out that you wouldn’t have room to receive.”  In a similar fashion, when you give of yourself to the world, expecting nothing in return, the windows of Heaven open up and you get back more than you ever gave.

Additional Resources

https://blog.myhelps.us/spirituality-blog-post-does-god-answer-prayer/

Understanding How to Use Reiki Energy for Mind and Body

Are you Afraid That God Will Not Answer Your prayer?

God answers prayer

The bible teaches that for God to answer your, prayer, you must first believe and have, faith, that God is first able and willing to give you the desires of your heart.  But there are ways to improve the chances that God will answer your, prayer. A, prayer, is a special kind of intention. Therefore, the rules that apply to the Power of intentions, which are rules about consciousness, apply. Your, prayer, will be answered, or not, depending on events happening out of sight – but not out of mind.

The mind furnishes the mechanics of making any intention come true. An intention or, prayer request, sent to God needs, faith, to rocket it to the heavens. An intention to graduate at the top of your class or to marry the man of your dreams takes focus, diligence and action.

The bible also teaches, “Faith,  Without Works Is Dead”.

– “What does it profit, my brethren, if someone says he has, faith, but does not have works? Can, faith, save him?”

What makes any intention or, prayer, come true?

Three vital elements are at work in, Prayer :

1. How deep into the mind is the intention coming from- how badly do you want it?

2. How steady is your focus- do you think about it every day?

3. How fluid is your intention – are you attached to the outcome?

When you perfect these three things, the power of intention and your, prayer request, becomes real and powerful.

 

The Power of , Prayer

1: Depth of awareness – “Like a river that runs fast on the surface but much more slowly near the bottom, the mind is conceived of as both active and still.” For the power of, prayer, to be seen yo have to be still and connect to source, God.

The stillness is present, for example, in the space between thoughts. When you are accustomed to experiencing your mind only through activity (i.e., sensations, images, feelings, and thoughts), the silent source of the mind has been missed. The whole point of Eastern meditation practices is to reacquaint a person with this source. The more often you dive into your silent mind, the deeper your intentions are coming from when you aren’t meditating. The bible also teaches that you can find God in the stillness. …

“Then a spirit passed by my face; The hair of my flesh bristled up. It stood still, but I could not discern its appearance; A form was before my eyes; There was silence, then I heard a voice: ‘Can mankind be just before God? Can a man be pure before his Maker?’…” Job 4:15 – 17

Some ways to access source for God to Answer Prayer:

  • Your prayer closet,
  • meditation,
  • calm peaceful surroundings,
  • minimal mental agitation,
  • stress free living,
  • self-acceptance
  • and self-awareness.

 

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Steady mental focus – Calling up an intention is natural to everyone’s mind. The key is that the intention be one-pointed, that is, your desire doesn’t conflict with other desires or get dissipated in mental restlessness. We’ve all experienced moments of knowing exactly what we want and never losing focus as long as our desire holds our attention.

Does God, answer, prayer? Absolutely, once we are clear and specific about what we ask for, act purposefully, not lose sight of the goal, have confidence and, faith, and do the works diligently; then we attract our intentions into our experience. When we tap into the supernatural, all power of God and the Holy Spirit, then we make quantum leaps to achieving our desires and intentions.

What hurts Intentions? Multitasking, mental confusion, conflicted desires, lack of self-knowledge, fantasy and daydreaming, short attention span, a craving to escape the self with drugs or alcohol and finally a lack of belief in God and in yourself.

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Have an open mind when you prayer

Fluid awareness – Do you have an open mind that can adapt to any response from the world? Do you have a mind that is committed to the destination, but allows God to map out the route and the stops along the way to the destination? No better example exists than playing a video game, where the player is fiercely intent of scoring points but must be open to every surprising, unexpected event in order to reach a high score. In everyday life, a desire is focused at its inception; but you should let your attachment to it go, and await whatever response comes your way.

In these three elements, as you can see, lies a lifetime of potentiality unfolding into actuality. Every thought has the power of intention behind it.

Every, prayer, can be answered if you empower it with, faith, believe and action. The bible tells us of the paralyzed man who had, faith, and belief that Jesus can heal him; but Jesus was in a crowded place and he could not get in through the door so he had his helpers knock a hole in the roof of the building and let him down in front of Jesus. Jesus told him immediately that his “sins were forgiven” and he was healed.

 

“Some men came, bringing to him a paralyzed man, carried by four of them. 4 Since they could not get him to Jesus because of the crowd, they made an opening in the roof above Jesus by digging through it and then lowered the mat the man was lying on. 5 When Jesus saw their, faith, he said to the paralyzed man, “Son, your sins are forgiven.” – Mark 2:3-5

God not only, answers prayers, but you can access the Universal power of intention and begin co-creating your future. The only issue is how far you are willing to go to cooperate with this ability, to unearth its possibilities, and improve the quality of your life.

Additional Resources 

The Power of Intention – Seven ways to Access Energy

https://blog.myhelps.us/how-awareness-spirituality-help-solve-problems/

 

Universal Law of the Harvest: Are you Eating Your Seed?

Universal laws of sowing and reaping

 The, Law of the Harvest,  is one of the, Universal Laws. We are all familiar with the, universal laws, like the, Laws of Gravity. We know that if we jump off a building, we will fall to the ground. We know that if an apple rolls off a table it will fall to the ground. Only in space we see things floating around. I was watching a movie recently where someone vomited in space and the vomit well ….you get the picture. It did not fall to the ground! The, Universal Laws, of the Harvest can literally be referred to as the Power of the seed. You can’t harvest without first planting a seed.   See an excerpt below on planting and harvesting Lettuce.

Universal Laws of the Harvest is the reaping and sowing Principle

The, Universal Law, of the Harvest, can be demonstrated with planting lettuce. Lettuce can be started from seed or from plants. Some gardeners like to direct seed their lettuce; but many prefer to start transplants and then move them into the garden after they get off to a good start. Lettuce seed germinates best in moderate to cool temperatures with soil temperatures of 75 degrees being about ideal. The seeds are small and flat so some seed companies now offer palatalized seed for easier more accurate seeding and germination.

Lettuce seed won’t germinate well if buried too deep, so you must cover them with about 1/4 inch of light sand or screened compost. Press them lightly on the surface to firm soil or growing media against the seed and then mist them well to thoroughly moisten. One mistake many gardeners make when direct seeding lettuce out in the garden is to not prepare a fine textured, smooth seed bed. Scattered into chunky, crusty soil lettuce seed will seldom make a good stand.

Keep the seeds moist until they sprout and get off to a good start. If a seed dries out at any time during the germination process it will die. If you start seed outdoors it helps a lot to place a row cover fabric over the seed row, suspended to prevent the row cover from getting pressed into the soil surface with watering or rains. The row cover helps to keep the seeds from drying out quickly in the sun and drying wind. Remove the cover to water the seeds once or twice a day to keep them moist. Use a mister nozzle on the water hose to prevent blasting the seeds away. Gardeners often tend to plant more lettuce than they need.

Your harvest is a direct proportion to what you plant

Think about it. How many heads or plants of leaf lettuce do you eat a week? Plant enough to last a couple of weeks and a few extras to allow for some that won’t make it. Scatter the seeds one half to an inch apart. It is really easy to plant them too thick. Then when you try to thin the seeds it’s difficult not to do significant damage to the remaining plants. Plant Care Lettuce performs best if you keep it growing well with adequate soil moisture and moderate fertilization.

Water transplants in with a dilute solution of soluble fertilizer according to label instructions. Repeat this application twice weekly for a couple of weeks to ensure the new plants are off to a good start. A light application of dry fertilizer when the plants have been in about two weeks should take them on through their harvest time. Sprinkle one half cup of a 3-1-2 or 4-1-2 ratio fertilizer per 10 foot of planting row. Then lightly scratch it into the surface and water it in well. Lettuce is shallow rooted so avoid deep cultivation. Stay ahead of weeds so you don’t disturb the lettuce plants later when removing large competing weeds.

Light, shallow cultivation is best. You can mulch the best when plants are well on their way. This will also help prevent soil from splashing onto the leaves during rain or irrigation. Problems Lettuce used to be plagued by several diseases that could wipe out plantings. Most modern varieties have some good resistance built in, but at times during wet periods some fungal rots and mildews may show up. I suggest that should such a problem arise just pull out affected plants and keep the new plantings coming rather than resort to sprays, especially since by the time some rot shows up it is too late to do that plant much good with a spray. Lettuce is fairly cold hardy and will tolerate light frosts with little to no damage.

Young seedlings are more prone to freeze damage. Harvest Head types are best harvested after they develop a firm head. Bibb lettuce is ready to harvest when the plants have reached about their full size and the leaves are just starting to cup inward slightly as if to form a loose head. Leaf lettuce can be harvested at any time from when you are thinning young plants on. But is it best to either harvest older leaves, leaving the plants to grow for later harvests or cut entire plants out when they reach near full size for the variety. I generally make harvest decisions based on how much other lettuce is coming along for later harvest. If I have plenty on the way I’ll pull more plants when they are younger. If not then I may just harvest outer leaves to get more later on from the older plants. The, law of the harvest, is finite.  You have to plant the seed and let nature do the rest.  If you don’t plant, you cannot get a harvest.

The, Universal law of the harvest, can be applied to all areas of life.

The, Universal Law, of the harvest, most popular text reference is from the book of Galatians in the Bible which reads,

“For whatever a man sows that and that only is what he will reap.

Most people are inclined to ask the “why” question when things happen to them. In most instances the answer is found in the, law of the harvest.   You are simply reaping the harvests of what you have previously sown. Whenever you get results you do not desire, begin to interrogate what kind of seeds you have been planting. From the lettuce illustration above; if you plant lettuce seeds, you will not reap or harvest cabbage. Thus the reference that you always reap what you sow!

The reason why some probably do not have happiness is because they don’t sow happiness. When you sow strife you reap strife. This is why it is necessary to carefully analyze what seeds you plant in your relationships, be it with your friends, family, or business associates.   The quality of that relationship is solely premised on the seeds you plant with your actions and words. If you plant mistrust, you will reap mistrust. One of the best advice I have every received on seed planting in relationships was

“treat your marriage and relationships like a bank account, you have to make more deposits than withdrawals or you become overdrawn”.

Every time you give of yourself or serve another, you are planting seeds that will grow into a harvest. I believe that even if you are planting into a relationship now that does not bear fruit, you will still harvest in another relationship or in your job or in your children! So keep planting the, law of the harvest, is truth.

Another, law of the harvest, is that you will reap according to the measure that you sow. The Law states that: “He who sows sparingly and grudgingly will also reap sparingly and grudgingly and he who sows generously will also reap generously and with blessings.”

Once you have identified the kind of harvest you desire, it is important to realize that again you determine the amount of harvest you receive with the amount of seed you plant. In the illustration above the farmer planted much more seed than was necessary for the harvest because he knew that some will die, either from decease, from thinning, or from rocky soil. If the seed you are planting is for the harvest of a promotion then you have to work harder than the rest and stand out. If the seed you are planting is to harvest a spouse, then you have to plant trust, service, love, affection, stability, and much more seeds than the other suitors.

It is like the seed put in the soil – the more one sows, the greater the harvest. ~~~~Orison Swett Marden

The, Law of the Harvest, says We Reap In Proportion to What We Sow

The promise and warning of Scripture about, sowing and reaping, is that we reap what we sow. This means that life’s choices are filled with consequences both good and bad — Reaping what we sow means we reap only what has been sown, we reap in kind as we sow, we reap in a different season than we sow, we reap more than we sow, but we also reap in proportion to what we sow.

We also can reap more than we sow. No fact is more significant and sobering than this one. When we sow good, we bountifully receive from the hand of God who is debtor to no man;

The, universal law, of the  harvest states that the, harvest, is always greater than the seed planted.

If this were not the case, no farmer would ever plant a thing; if he only got back what germinated in the ground. He would be on the losing end and spend his life in utter futility.   Reaping more than we sow is fundamental to the, Universal  Laws, of the Harvest and this is not just true for the agricultural world, it is true for nearly every aspect of life: for the physical and the spiritual, for believers and unbelievers alike.   The, Universal law,  of the harvest, works in reverse as well. When we sow evil, we will generally reap more evil than we sowed as well. This is one of the most important of the, universal laws.

Application of the 7  Universal Laws

There are, 7 Universal Laws. Some people are in the habit of expecting way too much than what they give in. A salesperson who does not do the activity of calling on customers or engaging in the sales activity; but who hopes to get lucky by customers falling in his or her lap soon finds out that the, universal Law,  of the Harvest is finite.

“You can’t reap what you don’t plant”

Only miracles supersede and defy these laws. The effort you put in determines the outcome you receive. Always!

Another, law of the harvest, is that the harvest follows planting and not vice versa.

Some people are naïve to say the least. They expect to reap first then they harvest. That is absurd. The Laws of, sowing and reaping, says you first sow then you reap. How miraculous would it be that you find a field of lettuce and no one planted any seeds or seedlings? I would bet that you would not eat that lettuce because you would be suspicious of where it came from. So expecting the rewards before you do the work is ludicrous.

  • You have to plant the seed,
  • you have to water every day,
  • you have to fertilize,
  • you have to make sure the plants get sunlight,
  • you have to protect from pests;
  • only then you can taste the sweetness of the, harvest.

You must have seed for your harvest. Are you eating your seed?

Most average and poor people are guilty of this statement, “we don’t give because we don’t have.” The reality is the opposite however; you don’t have because you don’t give. The, universal law, of the, harvest, says you have to give to get. Someone told me a great analogy once at a party.

“If your hands are closed, then not only can you not give, but you also cannot receive”

So make sure your hand is open to give and to receive. Everyone has a seed which will take them to a next level of plenty (with regard to the seed sown). The problem is most people think they should have plenty in order to plant. That is why some people need thousands to start a business while some can start from just a few dollars. I read about a lady who borrowed $3000.00 from family and friends to start her own business as a pottery consultant. I don’t remember the name of her company, but she purchased pots and pans and taught people how to cook in those pots and pans.

She had just sold her Company to Warren Buffet for 900 million! God can do a lot with very little!

The last, Law of the Harvest, I will share states that,

“There is always a time interval between planting and harvesting.”

Sowing and reaping happens in different seasons

You sow in a different season from the one you reap in. Most people cannot endure the season of waiting for the, harvest, which is why they do not plant at all. They seek instant gratification so they would rather eat the seed, rather than plant it and wait for the, harvest. They do something today and expect results tomorrow. There is nothing like that! You can’t circumvent the, Law of the Harvest! You miss or eliminate a step and you get no lettuce or fruit.

If you decide that to plant and not water, your seedlings will die. If you start watering and caring for the soil and there is no seed planted you reap nice dirt! You have to plant, water, protect and wait for the harvest. You plant your seed in the spring and, harvest, in the summer or fall. Remember that for everything you need in life, there is a seed that you can plant. Everything that you have ever wanted in your life can be planted and you will begin to enjoy the benefits of the, laws of the harvest.

If you plant nothing you reap nothing.

Start planting the seeds that give you the results you require. Remember if you eat your seed, there can be no, harvest. Everyone has something they can plant!

The, law of the harvest, can be applied to your Academics, Spiritual life, Finances, Relationships, Career, Business and anywhere else you desire to see results.

Additional Resources

Caring for your Inception or Thought Seeds

https://blog.myhelps.us/how-to-care-for-your-thought-seed/

https://blog.myhelps.us/how-to-reap-where-you-plant/

How to Program Your Subconscious Mind for Permanent Change

subconscious mind reprogramming

The, subconscious mind, is a data-bank for everything, which is not in your, conscious mind,. It stores your beliefs, your previous experience, your memories, your skills. Everything that you have seen, done or thought is also there. It is also your guidance system. The, subconscious mind, can also be described as a tape recorder and it just plays back what it records unless you make the conscious effort at, subconscious mind reprogramming, and  erase the tape and record new messages.  That is the only way to affect permanent change, erase and re record.

Today on the, Transform your Mind, to Transform your Life Radio show and podcast, Coach Myrna Young interviews Neuro Linguistic Programming, NLP, Coach Van Henry. Van tells our audience why he became an, NLP, coach. He was on assignment as an engineer in South Africa during the Apartheid regime, when he had a conversation with a Black man who told him that he was told at a young age that he was unteachable, because he had a smaller brain than the white man.

Van of course told him that was a lie, that he himself was an educated black man with an engineering degree. He convinced this man that his brain was the same size as the White man, the Chinese man and all other races because God created us all equal! That was indeed, subconscious mind, programming.

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This Black man was convinced, because he was looking at the evidence, Van Henry himself. He then changed his, subconscious mind, programming by rewriting the tape and re recording new information to believe that he could be educated and that he had as big a brain as the White man. This Black man went on to have a college degree and become a supervisor, leading a fulfilling life.

So as a Transformations Coach, I would like to do the same for you. The lie that you tell yourself can be anything. It does not have to be that you are not as smart enough, pretty enough, thin enough etc. ; you could believe that you are limited by any other belief that is holding you in bondage.

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Transform your Mind Soundcloud podcast

How the, subconscious mind, works

Your, subconscious mind, is an unquestioning servant that works day and night to make your behavior fits a pattern consistent with your emotionalized thoughts, hopes, and desires. Your, subconscious mind, grows either flowers or weeds in the garden of your life, whichever you plant by the mental equivalents you create.

Your, subconscious mind, has what is called a homeostatic impulse. It keeps your body temperature at 98.6 degrees Fahrenheit, just as it keeps you breathing regularly and keeps your heart beating at a certain rate. Through your autonomic nervous system, it maintains a balance among the hundreds of chemicals in your billions of cells so that your entire physical machine functions in complete harmony most of the time.

Your, subconscious mind, also practices homeostasis in your mental realm, by keeping you thinking and acting in a manner consistent with what you have done and said in the past.

Neuro Linguistic Programming, is the art of training the, subconscious mind, to achieve a goal.

  1. The first thing you have to do to, subconscious mind reprogramming, is to Master Self. Master your self talk, master your beliefs.
  2. Then you have to write your goals down and give them form.
  3. Once you give them form, you have to tell someone who can hold you accountable.
    This does two things. Firstly, once you speak your goals into the atmosphere you activate the, Laws of Attraction, and secondly it motivates you to not look like a failure to the person holding you accountable.
  4. The forth thing is to access your values to be sure there is no conflict with your beliefs. This is where awareness comes in. You have to know who you are.

You have to know Yourself, to Grow Yourself

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Transform your Mind iTunes 

For you to grow, to get out of your comfort zone, you have to be willing to feel awkward and uncomfortable doing new things the first few times. If it’s worth doing well, it’s worth doing poorly until you get a feel for it, until you develop a new comfort zone at a new, higher level of competence.

Subconscious Mind Reprogramming

For those looking to expand their realm of comfort zones, I highly recommend considering the habits of successful people as they are the patterns commonly adopted by the minds of great leaders and thinkers. Unlocking the power of these behaviors will put you one step closer to being able to make the same things happen in your life.

Learning techniques for, subconscious mind reprogramming, will help you believe in yourself because your confidence will no longer be challenged by fear of the unknown. But more importantly, doing so will train your brain to be in line with your true desires, dreams, and life goals and a mission driven life. 

The more in tune with your, subconscious mind, you become, the closer you will be to breaking through to success. For example, you might have an idea for a book that has been on your back burner for years. With the right level of confidence, you’ll take the next step in learning how to write a book, rather than clinging to the dream, but never acting.

Listen to this YouTube video and hear directly from, NLP, coach Van Henry on How to Program your, subconscious mind, for permanent change. Once you believe, then you can achieve!.

You become a master builder, as your coach I will give you the tools to help you build.

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iHeart Radio

 

If you are a coach or an author and you would like to be a guest on the “Mindset Transformation Talk Radio Show” email me at info@myhelps.us

Subscribe to get a copy of all new shows

Additional Resources

https://blog.myhelps.us/how-to-reprogram-your-unconscious-mind/

https://blog.myhelps.us/who-is-tending-your-mind-garden/

How To Pray for a Job as a Job Seeker

How to Find a Job

If you are a, job seeker, spend time with God in, prayer; you will get direction on how to get that, dream job, because with God nothing is impossible.

Listen to the Full Interview here:

 

I want to welcome you to the Transform your Mind to Transform your Life,  Radio,  Podcast and now television show page. We are now live every Sunday 6:00 pm EST on Preach the Word World Wide Television Network and 24/7 on demand.

Introduction Prayers for the Job Seeker

My guest today is Sonia H Cameron. Sonia is the author of “God Help Me Find A Job: 21 Prayers For The Job Seeker

Book: Prayers for the Job Seeker
Book: Prayers for the Job Seeker

This is such an important message for today’s climate where there are millions of people unemployed and are, job seekers. You may be praying “God to help me find a, job” and maybe not only help you find a job; but hopefully your, prayers, are also for increase. A better, job, or even a raise in pay.  Some states are considering raising the minimum wage.

I want to reference a scripture on, prayer, it is found in Psalms 141: 2

“Let my, prayer, stand before you like incense.  Let my uplifted hands be like the evening offering”.

I personally believe that the language of God is faith and, prayer.  You must have faith that anything you ask for in, prayer, that you’ve already received.

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How To Ask God to Help You Find a Job

We’re going to take a deep dive into, prayers, for the, job seeker.

Myrna – Sonia what led you to believe in, prayer?

Sonia – First of all I want to introduce myself.  I am the blogger from blessthework.com.

I was led to write the book in 2020 when I heard that there were 17 million people unemployed during the pandemic and my heart just went out to those people.

I was inspired to start pinning, prayers, and the book just flowed out of me. I got an editor and the book just came into place in about six weeks.

Christians need God’s Help to Find a Job

In 2008 I was released from my, job, and I really did not know what to do or how to proceed.

I had been a, Christian, all my life; but I never thought about, God, being present in my career.  I never mixed, God, and career together.  I was in a situation where I went on an interview and they asked me, why I left my most recent position, and I didn’t tell the truth. I was afraid to tell them I was fired so I lied and told them I was laid off.

Myrna – That’s a common fear among, job seekers, but as a, Christian, you probably felt badly because you told a lie.

Sonia – Correct. I was distraught because of this lie and I just started praying.

I said, God, you know I messed up.  I’m depending on you to help me, find a job.

I’m going to stand in my truth the next time someone asked me, why did you leave

your last job.  I’m going to tell them it just didn’t work out.

God did help me, find a job, so I started writing and blogging about it, because I felt like it would help the, jobseeker.

I post tips on acing the, job search, and other useful information on my blog for the, job seeker,

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Transform your Mind Soundcloud podcast

Tips on How to Find a Job

Here are 2 tips on, how to find a job, or propel their career forward. Tip # 1 is:

  1. Rehearsing your wins because when you’re in an interview you need to brag on yourself. A lot of times when a person gets released from a, job, they feel badly about themselves and they lose confidence.  But if you take the time to write your story and what you’ve accomplished in your last, job, eg.  You were promoted, you were responsible for saving the company lots of money on an initiative etc. These wins give you confidence.
  2. Number two is to take a baby steps every day towards your goal to, find a job. My suggestion is to do one thing a day. Whether is making phone calls or sending an email or taking an assessment. Take baby steps.

Myrna – This is good. My pastor preached a sermon on creating your “book of wars” you record all your victories and all your wins. This is powerful to help you when you feel low. The book of wars is mentioned in the bible.

In an interview they’re going to ask you what are your strengths, so if you convert your wins to your strengths, it’s an excellent way to brag on yourself.

Sonia – On my website blessthework.com I have a road map and a calendar of things that you can do daily to lead you to your next, job.

Why is Prayer important for the Job Seeker

Myrna – I want to get back to, prayer.  Why do you feel that, prayer, is an important component to the, jobseeker?  You share 21 prayers in your book; but before we get into specific, prayers, why do you think that the, jobseeker, should lead with, prayer?

Sonia – A lot of times people feel like it’s impossible to get the next, job, or their, dream job; but Luke 1:37 says

“Nothing is impossible for God!”

 

So, if you spend time with, God, in, prayer, you will get direction on how to get that, dream job, and nothing will be impossible.  If you don’t spend time reading the, scriptures, you won’t have that confidence. You must spend time in, prayer.  Sit and listen to inspirational songs or gospel songs.  When you are still, you will get downloads of next steps from the Holy Spirit.

When Jesus went back to heaven, he left us a comforter and a friend, and that person is the holy spirit.  When you spend time in the presence of God, the holy spirit will minister to you and tell you what your next step should be.

Myrna – I definitely believe in that wholeheartedly.  I sit still and meditate on the word.  I meditate on the life that’s flowing through my body and try to be aware of God’s presence. I’m always listening for instructions from my spirit guide.

When you are looking for a, job, or have any other goal in life that you’re believing and, praying, for, whether you are praying for a spouse, a job, your health, you should listen for next steps from God or the Holy Spirit.

Keto Diet plan
Keto Diet plan

Prayer for the Job seeker

Heavenly father you are the most powerful God, you are my rock and my salvation.

I must be honest; fear has taken over my thoughts lately.  I know this fear is not an emotion that comes from you and I know that faith in you is the remedy for fear.

Thank you for changing the atmosphere of my life because of your power inside of me I am no longer afraid.  I will not fear famine, I will not fear criticism, I will overcome the thoughts of not being smart enough.

I am not afraid of economic reports, because you control my personal economy.  I am not scared of being in the wrong demographic. I am determined to break past my fear of failure. I am full of faith that I will get your provision for a new, job.  I know you will exceed my expectations because you keep all of your promises.

I believe the scripture that says “for I am the lord your God who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, do not fear I will help you Isaiah 41.

In the name of Jesus, I pray Amen.

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iHeart Radio

 Prayer for connections for the job seeker

Heavenly father you are all knowing God. I need you to connect me with the people who will assist me with my, job search. You know me and everything about them, you know the skills I need to connect with the right people.

Thank you for making me an excellent communicator so that I can tell people how to help me.

Lord I believe I will recognize people who can solve a problem for me. I pray that as I spend more time with you, you will connect me to those who have influence and can give me favor with colleagues, human resource associates and industry leaders.

Thank you for the divine connections, that will help me reach my destiny.  I believe John 15:7

“if you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish and it will be done for you”.

In Jesus name I pray Amen

Conclusion

Myrna – Tell us a little bit more about your book “God Help Me Find A Job: 21 Prayers For The Job Seeker” and about your blog.

Sonia – My book is available on amazon. In fact, I have two books one just came out this year it’s a companion journal to the, prayer, book.  The companion journal lets you journal about your job search journey and it asks key questions.  It allows you to write your own, prayers, because everybody’s, job search, journey is unique.

In the back of the book I have a job search organizer. This, job search, organizer lets you record your search, records the employers that you have put applications in with who you talk to, what kind of salary they offer etc.

Both these books are available on amazon. I have a blog for, prayers, and a blog for advice on your career and the name of my website is blessthework.com. You can follow me on Facebook fan page @bless the work of our hands.

 

Myrna – Thank you for being my first guest on the Preach the Word Worldwide Television Network.  It was an on-time message.

Additional Resources

How to Access God Through Worship

 

5 Mindset Shifts For Couples to Have Fantastic Relationships

mindset shifts for long term relationships

If you want a fantastic, relationship, with your significant other, you need some mindset shifts, from thinking like a girlfriend to thinking like his wife.

Mindset shifts or, transformation, is necessary if your belief system is not producing the results you are expecting in life. As a Life and, Transformation, Coach, I wanted to share some, mindset, transformations about relationships that may get you better results.

5 Mindset Shifts

1. What is the right reason to enter into a long term relationship?

Most of us (including me before I was enlightened) feel that we should enter into a long term commitment because we “fell” in love.
Others may enter into a long term, relationship, like marriage because they want children; they want security or even to stem loneliness. But, according to Neale Donald Walsch from the “Conversations with God” series, we should put a little more thought into choosing a long term partner than feelings.

 

We should enter into a long term partnership for a mutually beneficial purpose.

I was watching an very old episode of Oprah a few weeks ago and she was interviewing the Smith’s. I was so impressed with Will Smith and Jada Pinketh Smith’s philosophy on marriage and family. They had a mutually beneficial purpose for their, relationship, and it continues today. They have family meetings every week to keep the purpose of the marriage and family in front of them.

Their purpose for getting together was to enhance the lives of others and they do that by always choosing work that inspires others.
And even though we have heard many rumors of the marriage failing, it is still standing because their purpose for it is greater than the two of them.

  • So when two people enter in a, long term relationship, they have the, mindset, to figure out the Why? What is the mutually beneficial purpose?
    Are they wanting to bring up children for a purpose?
    Like Will and Jada Smith
    -Are they wanting to enhance Gods kingdom?
    Like Joel and Victoria Osteen
    -Are they going to change the world through leadership?
    Like Barack and Michelle Obama?

If the purpose is strong it will be like a house built on the rocks, it will withstand the storms

Why relationships Fail

2. Mindset Shifts, Why do relationships fail?
Statistics show that, relationships, fail because of failed expectations.
Most, relationships, start out with each party having predefined expectations about what they want out of the relationship and what they want from the other person.

Contrary to popular opinion another person cannot complete you, you must complete yourself.

The bible teaches that it is not if another person will disappoint, but when. So when you enter into a, relationship, and its survival is based on what the other person does, says, etc. You will always be disappointed.

Mindset shifts,  is necessary to become the best you, to make sure you are living up to your ideal self because we can never change another person, we can only change ourselves.
For example, there is conflict over a wife’s expectation that her husband takes her out on romantic dinners once per month. She is waiting on him to make the offer and he doesn’t, instead he goes out with his friends and leaves her at home with the kids.
She has several options:
Sulking, picking a fight, going out with her girlfriends – none of which heals the relationship – or she can Give That Which She Wants.
She can take him to dinner, she can cook a romantic dinner and send the kids to the babysitter. She can respond with love.

Anything you want, you first have to give.

Mindset Shift – Take care of yourself First

3. Mindset shifts: – Become self-centered.
I know this is going to shock some, because we were all brought up to believe that being selfish and self-centered is bad; but not according to the bible! The bible teaches that we must love others as we love ourselves.

Our first relationship must be with self.

We must learn to honor and cherish self and love ourselves before we can love another.
We can never truly fall in love with another, until we have truly fallen in love with ourselves.
I know women are always sacrificing self for others, they think it makes for a good relationship; but it has the opposite effect.

They get burnt out and then resentment sets in. Then they start to resent their spouse for doing nothing. They cultivated that attitude.
The old saying that you have to train people how to treat you is truth. You start off doing all the work in the home, looking after the kids, doing all the cooking, while your spouse drinks beer and watch TV, then 5 years later when you are burnt out. You shouldn’t blame your spouse!

You should be self centered and make time in the day for your self.
Get up and go to the gym, walk, pray or meditate.
Make time in the evening to reflect, learn something, relax!
Everyone around you will benefit.

4. Mindset shifts:   – Being hurt and disappointed  

We will all have hurt and disappointments in our lives.
In fact there is an old saying that says:

You are either going through something, coming out of something or about to go through something!

It is time for us to adopt a different response to our challenges and disappointments.
As humans we react with pain and hurt to what another is being, saying or doing.
The first thing we should do is to become conscious and aware of the feelings we are having.
Don’t run from the pain, don’t mask it with drugs or alcohol. Feel it, acknowledge it.
Try to find yourself in it.
Be honest with your feelings.

It is very important to not react with vengeance or rage, and to understand your true feelings.
Once you feel it and acknowledge it, it’s power over you diminishes and you can get to the place of this of

“This too shall pass”.
After that you can then reach for your highest self and look for the lessons.

A master knows that all experiences comes to teach and is for self-growth.

5. Mindset shifts, – Forgive or look past behaviors of your spouse or significant 

As Christians we are taught to forgive, if we want to forgiveness.
To not judge before we take the plank out of our own eyes.
So it would seem that the Christian thing to do is to forgive our spouses for his/her sins.
But in the book “Conversations with God” by Neale Donald Walsh

The author teaches that you should always do what’s best for us. Remember we are self-centered.
Your girl friends are always going to encourage you to leave your husband because he is a cheater.
Walsch says that you should leave your spouse only if it is best action for you or your children.
You leave when the marriage no longer fulfills its purpose.

Let’s look at Hilary Clinton. I believe she married Bill Clinton with a purpose. He has always been a cheater but she saw his potential as a future President; So she proposed to him and chose to overlook his infidelity. She chose self!
Today her daughter is living a purpose driven life, She was First Lady of the Unites States of America and could become the first female President of the United States of America. You have never heard of her infidelity even though we have heard all about her husband’s.
We should all follow her lead and leave our cheating spouses to God, we should concern ourselves only with self. Being the best we can be and we will get our crown here on earth as well as our heavenly crown in the next life.

Myrna is the Host of the “Mindset Transformation radio show” on

https://www.wdjyfm.com/#!on-air/cee5 every Wednesday from 5:00 pm to 6:00 pm

If you would like to be a guest or become a sponsor contact her at info@myhelps.us.

Listen to past broadcasts of the “Mindset Transformations radio show” on the Myhelps Youtube Channel
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC8p2lfxF2GhOihRv8N3EZeA

Subscribe to the Transform your Mind podcast on iTunes 

Additional Resources:

https://blog.myhelps.us/surviving-r-kelly-mindset-sexual-predator/

How to Get and How to Keep a Man

How to use Intuition as Your Guide to Happiness

How to use your intuition

Nicole Leffer is a Spiritual coach and, Clairvoyant, in this episode she teaches us, how to use intuition, to make decisions and lead happier, more fulfilling, purpose driven lives.

 

Using Intuition to help others

As an, Intuitive, and, medium, Nicole is able to pick up on information and guidance about past, present and future situations, as well as relationship and situational dynamics and likely outcomes of situations. Her gifts operate primarily via, clairvoyant, (intuitive seeing), clairaudient (intuitive hearing), clairsentient (intuitive feeling), and claircognizant (intuitive knowing) impressions. She is also a, medium, and can frequently pick up on the emotions others are experiencing and she often picks up on world events before they happen.

Called to utilize her gifts to help others lead happier, more fulfilling and purpose driven lives, Nicole offers, intuitive, readings and spiritual coaching both in Atlanta and around the world.

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Transform your Mind Stitcher
Transform your Mind Stitcher

What is Intuition

So we’re going to talk today about, intuition.  How to use intuition, to transform your life.  So how do we tie in, intuitive, reading to, intuition?

When I received the information from an, intuitive reading, it’s always a guide.  What I get is more about the situation in your life.  For example, a parent is trying to decide about keeping their child in a certain school. They’re having issues with their child and they’re thinking about moving them to another school.  They’re leaning toward moving them to another school; but they’re in conflict.  I may get the information in the form of an apple, which is a reference to education, then I’ll know it’s about their child.

They’re leaning towards a change that their own, intuition, is trying to guide them toward making the change, and I will get a validation. Something like this change will be good for your child in the long run. Because of  my gift, I get clearer information downloaded to me.  The parents are tapping into their, intuition, to move their child to another school but it is corrupted with doubt.

Most of my questions are, about relationships.  Should I marry this man? Is this woman the one? But I don’t answer questions until I have a total download of my intuitive reading.  I have no idea in the beginning of the reading of what the person’s primary objective is. I ask them to accept the reading and whatever downloads to me and then after I receive, then I ask them what they want to know.

 How to use intuition, so that it works for you.

We’re all built with the capacity of, intuition. It is what makes us human.  The first step in, using your, intuition, is recognizing that we all receive our, intuition, in multiple different ways; so the first thing is identifying how you personally receive your, intuition.  If you don’t know how you receive, intuition, you can’t recognize it when you receive it.  If you are, clairvoyant, then you see the picture in your mind. It’s not like you use something outside of your body or anything like that, it’s more like you close your eyes and picture the image in your mind.  If you’re a visual learner and are very visual, there’s a really good chance that you get your, intuition, by seeing.

I think a lot more people have the gift of hearing.  When you hear, it very similar to if you’re reading a book and your mind hears your inner voice. It is not a voice outside your head or hearing voices or anything like that. It is a variation of your own voice that you get your, intuitive, hit with.

How to use intuition, I personally get my, intuition, first thing in the morning when I’m waking up.  That’s how I recognize that it is my higher self,  giving me instructions and I always act on those instructions. I also meditate every single day, that helps me stay clear.  I think if you are curious about really wanting to be in touch with your, intuition, a meditation practice is absolutely the best thing anybody can start with. It is the jumping off point.

 

You can also subscribe to your favorite podcast players to get new episodes as they are released.

Soundcloud, iTunes, TuneIn radio, Stitcher, iHeart Radio,  Spotify, Google play,

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Additional Resources

What are the, Secrets to Success,? Here are my 10 Secrets

https://blog.myhelps.us/program-positive-change/

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/intuition

Dealing with Anxiety Disorder after Addiction

Addiction and recovery side effects can include, anxiety disorder, and panic attacks. In this episode Dr Tra Ahia, Psychologist offers treatment options for dealing with, anxiety disorder.

I was listening to a podcast last week and the guest was talking about her, anxiety disorder, and her story triggered a memory of a personal acquaintance who was a heroin addict and developed, anxiety disorder.

My first introduction to Anxiety Disorder

In the late 80’s I was working in sales and my boss’s daughter was an, Heroin addict. We were close enough that she would tell me what it was like being addicted to Heroin. She told me how she would cook the heroin until it became a liquid and then she would shoot it into her neck because she got a more immediate high. She showed me the holes in her neck which she covered up with scarves. Her father who was wealthy gave her a car and she sold that car for peanuts to get money to buy Heroin.

She attempted to go to rehab several times; but always walked out because she said they just left you in a room to scream in pain. She said the pain of withdrawal was unbearable. She then started a methadone treatment which is a synthetic version of Heroin.  They reduced the dose of the methadone gradually to wean your body off Heroin. But what I want to get to was her, anxiety disorder. She got such bad, panic attacks, her gut was always in knots, that she couldn’t leave the house without her safe person, her boyfriend. I don’t remember if he used drugs; but when the relationship ended she was unable to leave to leave the house for weeks, not even to buy groceries. Then she was too anxious to start dating. She stressed about some man asking “Can I touch your boobs” I don’t know what became of her; but I think of her often.

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What happens to the brain with Anxiety Disorder

If you have an, anxiety disorder – Your brain raises ahead to predict the future. The guest on the podcast had, anxiety disorder, and she described it as “life fright” or , agoraphobia, She said to think about Stage fright. You feel nervous, you think you are going to freeze up or faint, you start to sweat, you think people are going to laugh at you etc. well people with, anxiety disorder, or, agoraphobia, feel like that all the time.

They have, agoraphobia, talking to strangers, checking out at the grocery store, at the bank, going for an interview, at a cocktail party, almost any conversation with a stranger, that’s why the guest called it “life fright.”

 

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How does Anxiety lead to Life Fright

Dr Tra  as the author of the book “Call me an Addict, war on women” How does my story regarding anxiety being called “Life Fright” relates to your experience?

I think for that young lady or whoever coined that term, for her that helped her manage her, anxiety disorder.  That term helped her understand for herself this thing that she was feeling, so for her that was a good term to use, this, Life Fright. My thoughts when I think about, life fright,  is that I’m afraid of living period.  The entire gamut of life, so for me I would not use that term as a replicator to, anxiety disorder; but I can see why she did.

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Transform your Mind Stitcher
Transform your Mind Stitcher

I understand there are 3 types of, Anxiety Disorders,

  1. Situational anxiety
  2. social anxiety and
  3. high functioning anxiety

Can you explain the difference of these forms of, anxiety,  and which is most common with substance abuse?

There are more than just three types of, anxiety disorder,  way more.  I think it’s important also for the audience to understand that when we talk about, anxiety disorder, we’re talking about an irrational fear or, agoraphobia, of something that someone is experiencing.  It’s irrational, it’s not logical that you are excessively fearful over this specific situation or you’re apprehensive about something or you have difficulty managing daily tasks.  So when we think about, agoraphobia, or,  anxiety disorder, I want them to know that it’s irrational to know your heart is racing, and you feel like you’re going to die.

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iHeart Radio

There are six main categories of, anxiety disorders,  like I said there are more than three!

  1. Phobias
  2. Panic attacks, with or without, agoraphobia, you have
  3. Generalized, anxiety disorder,
  4. Obsessive compulsive disorder or, OCD,
  5. Acute stress disorder and
  6. Post-traumatic stress disorder, or PTSD

 

The American Psychological Association lists research on how, anxiety disorder, is diagnosed.

This disorder called, anxiety disorder, the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual

It’s normal to become anxious and at one time or another. A car almost hit you, you are going for an interview, you sense danger etc. Anxiety is normal under certain conditions, what we are talking about here is the irrational fear or, agoraphobia, that is a disorder.

Something who’s unable to leave their home. This is, agoraphobia, they have a fear of leaving surroundings that they’re familiar with.

This a serious affliction.

 

There are three systems of functioning that need to change in, Anxiety Disorder

  1. Cognitive
  2. Physical and
  3. Behavioral

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How would, high-functioning anxiety, work?

An addict could develop a, panic attack, because perhaps they’re they don’t have the substance anymore, or it could be someone who gains, agoraphobia,  as a result of some interaction they’ve had with a place they frequented to attain their substance.

An addict with, high-functioning anxiety, usually is on a treatment plan in conjunction with medication to control their, anxiety disorder.

An addict could develop a, panic attack, because perhaps they’re they don’t have the substance anymore, or it could be someone who gains, agoraphobia,  as a result of some interaction they’ve had with a place they frequented to attain their substance.

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Transform your Mind Stitcher
Transform your Mind Stitcher

Anxiety disorder is a form of mental illness. Dr Tra outside of substance abuse, what are some other  contributing factors to, Anxiety Disorder?

I understand that mental illness presents itself in many forms:

  • Schizophrenia
  • Anxiety disorder
  • Anorexia
  • Depression
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TuneIn Radio

My research shows that these disorders present themselves as early as 14 years old and can be treated successfully by mental health professionals if treatment is started early; but because people feel that mental illness equals crazy, they don’t talk about it or seek help.

Research show that 90% of suicides results from mental illness like, anxiety disorder, and depression. How does talk therapy from a Life Coach, social worker or Psychologist such as yourself help patients?

Talk therapy allows the client to feel listened to and understood.  It allows them to download and get advise.  It can save many from suicide.

 

How would you help someone suffering from, anxiety disorder?

Mental illness is something that keeps a lot of people up at night but nobody wants to talk about during the day

It is the visitor who enters without knocking

1 in 20 become disabled by mental illness i.e. Can’t function in society

So let’s start talking.

ANXIETY, has become the defining mental health issue of our decade — women are affected at twice the rate of men, and now children and young adults are also more stressed and anxious than ever before. Join us to learn nutritional and gut solutions for your anxiety!

 

Additional Resources

Drug and Alcohol Treatment for Women with Trauma

https://blog.myhelps.us/understanding-and-managing-compulsive-behaviors/

https://blog.myhelps.us/call-me-an-addict-child-abuse-statistics-p3/

https://adaa.org/understanding-anxiety/suicide

https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/kc/suicidal-thoughts-ideation-193026