How to use Intuition as Your Guide to Happiness

How to use your intuition

Nicole Leffer is a Spiritual coach and, Clairvoyant, in this episode she teaches us, how to use intuition, to make decisions and lead happier, more fulfilling, purpose driven lives.

 

Using Intuition to help others

As an, Intuitive, and, medium, Nicole is able to pick up on information and guidance about past, present and future situations, as well as relationship and situational dynamics and likely outcomes of situations. Her gifts operate primarily via, clairvoyant, (intuitive seeing), clairaudient (intuitive hearing), clairsentient (intuitive feeling), and claircognizant (intuitive knowing) impressions. She is also a, medium, and can frequently pick up on the emotions others are experiencing and she often picks up on world events before they happen.

Called to utilize her gifts to help others lead happier, more fulfilling and purpose driven lives, Nicole offers, intuitive, readings and spiritual coaching both in Atlanta and around the world.

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What is Intuition

So we’re going to talk today about, intuition.  How to use intuition, to transform your life.  So how do we tie in, intuitive, reading to, intuition?

When I received the information from an, intuitive reading, it’s always a guide.  What I get is more about the situation in your life.  For example, a parent is trying to decide about keeping their child in a certain school. They’re having issues with their child and they’re thinking about moving them to another school.  They’re leaning toward moving them to another school; but they’re in conflict.  I may get the information in the form of an apple, which is a reference to education, then I’ll know it’s about their child.

They’re leaning towards a change that their own, intuition, is trying to guide them toward making the change, and I will get a validation. Something like this change will be good for your child in the long run. Because of  my gift, I get clearer information downloaded to me.  The parents are tapping into their, intuition, to move their child to another school but it is corrupted with doubt.

Most of my questions are, about relationships.  Should I marry this man? Is this woman the one? But I don’t answer questions until I have a total download of my intuitive reading.  I have no idea in the beginning of the reading of what the person’s primary objective is. I ask them to accept the reading and whatever downloads to me and then after I receive, then I ask them what they want to know.

 How to use intuition, so that it works for you.

We’re all built with the capacity of, intuition. It is what makes us human.  The first step in, using your, intuition, is recognizing that we all receive our, intuition, in multiple different ways; so the first thing is identifying how you personally receive your, intuition.  If you don’t know how you receive, intuition, you can’t recognize it when you receive it.  If you are, clairvoyant, then you see the picture in your mind. It’s not like you use something outside of your body or anything like that, it’s more like you close your eyes and picture the image in your mind.  If you’re a visual learner and are very visual, there’s a really good chance that you get your, intuition, by seeing.

I think a lot more people have the gift of hearing.  When you hear, it very similar to if you’re reading a book and your mind hears your inner voice. It is not a voice outside your head or hearing voices or anything like that. It is a variation of your own voice that you get your, intuitive, hit with.

How to use intuition, I personally get my, intuition, first thing in the morning when I’m waking up.  That’s how I recognize that it is my higher self,  giving me instructions and I always act on those instructions. I also meditate every single day, that helps me stay clear.  I think if you are curious about really wanting to be in touch with your, intuition, a meditation practice is absolutely the best thing anybody can start with. It is the jumping off point.

 

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Additional Resources

What are the, Secrets to Success,? Here are my 10 Secrets

https://blog.myhelps.us/program-positive-change/

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/intuition

Dealing with Anxiety Disorder after Addiction

Addiction and recovery side effects can include, anxiety disorder, and panic attacks. In this episode Dr Tra Ahia, Psychologist offers treatment options for dealing with, anxiety disorder.

I was listening to a podcast last week and the guest was talking about her, anxiety disorder, and her story triggered a memory of a personal acquaintance who was a heroin addict and developed, anxiety disorder.

My first introduction to Anxiety Disorder

In the late 80’s I was working in sales and my boss’s daughter was an, Heroin addict. We were close enough that she would tell me what it was like being addicted to Heroin. She told me how she would cook the heroin until it became a liquid and then she would shoot it into her neck because she got a more immediate high. She showed me the holes in her neck which she covered up with scarves. Her father who was wealthy gave her a car and she sold that car for peanuts to get money to buy Heroin.

She attempted to go to rehab several times; but always walked out because she said they just left you in a room to scream in pain. She said the pain of withdrawal was unbearable. She then started a methadone treatment which is a synthetic version of Heroin.  They reduced the dose of the methadone gradually to wean your body off Heroin. But what I want to get to was her, anxiety disorder. She got such bad, panic attacks, her gut was always in knots, that she couldn’t leave the house without her safe person, her boyfriend. I don’t remember if he used drugs; but when the relationship ended she was unable to leave to leave the house for weeks, not even to buy groceries. Then she was too anxious to start dating. She stressed about some man asking “Can I touch your boobs” I don’t know what became of her; but I think of her often.

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What happens to the brain with Anxiety Disorder

If you have an, anxiety disorder – Your brain raises ahead to predict the future. The guest on the podcast had, anxiety disorder, and she described it as “life fright” or , agoraphobia, She said to think about Stage fright. You feel nervous, you think you are going to freeze up or faint, you start to sweat, you think people are going to laugh at you etc. well people with, anxiety disorder, or, agoraphobia, feel like that all the time.

They have, agoraphobia, talking to strangers, checking out at the grocery store, at the bank, going for an interview, at a cocktail party, almost any conversation with a stranger, that’s why the guest called it “life fright.”

 

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How does Anxiety lead to Life Fright

Dr Tra  as the author of the book “Call me an Addict, war on women” How does my story regarding anxiety being called “Life Fright” relates to your experience?

I think for that young lady or whoever coined that term, for her that helped her manage her, anxiety disorder.  That term helped her understand for herself this thing that she was feeling, so for her that was a good term to use, this, Life Fright. My thoughts when I think about, life fright,  is that I’m afraid of living period.  The entire gamut of life, so for me I would not use that term as a replicator to, anxiety disorder; but I can see why she did.

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I understand there are 3 types of, Anxiety Disorders,

  1. Situational anxiety
  2. social anxiety and
  3. high functioning anxiety

Can you explain the difference of these forms of, anxiety,  and which is most common with substance abuse?

There are more than just three types of, anxiety disorder,  way more.  I think it’s important also for the audience to understand that when we talk about, anxiety disorder, we’re talking about an irrational fear or, agoraphobia, of something that someone is experiencing.  It’s irrational, it’s not logical that you are excessively fearful over this specific situation or you’re apprehensive about something or you have difficulty managing daily tasks.  So when we think about, agoraphobia, or,  anxiety disorder, I want them to know that it’s irrational to know your heart is racing, and you feel like you’re going to die.

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There are six main categories of, anxiety disorders,  like I said there are more than three!

  1. Phobias
  2. Panic attacks, with or without, agoraphobia, you have
  3. Generalized, anxiety disorder,
  4. Obsessive compulsive disorder or, OCD,
  5. Acute stress disorder and
  6. Post-traumatic stress disorder, or PTSD

 

The American Psychological Association lists research on how, anxiety disorder, is diagnosed.

This disorder called, anxiety disorder, the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual

It’s normal to become anxious and at one time or another. A car almost hit you, you are going for an interview, you sense danger etc. Anxiety is normal under certain conditions, what we are talking about here is the irrational fear or, agoraphobia, that is a disorder.

Something who’s unable to leave their home. This is, agoraphobia, they have a fear of leaving surroundings that they’re familiar with.

This a serious affliction.

 

There are three systems of functioning that need to change in, Anxiety Disorder

  1. Cognitive
  2. Physical and
  3. Behavioral

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How would, high-functioning anxiety, work?

An addict could develop a, panic attack, because perhaps they’re they don’t have the substance anymore, or it could be someone who gains, agoraphobia,  as a result of some interaction they’ve had with a place they frequented to attain their substance.

An addict with, high-functioning anxiety, usually is on a treatment plan in conjunction with medication to control their, anxiety disorder.

An addict could develop a, panic attack, because perhaps they’re they don’t have the substance anymore, or it could be someone who gains, agoraphobia,  as a result of some interaction they’ve had with a place they frequented to attain their substance.

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Anxiety disorder is a form of mental illness. Dr Tra outside of substance abuse, what are some other  contributing factors to, Anxiety Disorder?

I understand that mental illness presents itself in many forms:

  • Schizophrenia
  • Anxiety disorder
  • Anorexia
  • Depression
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My research shows that these disorders present themselves as early as 14 years old and can be treated successfully by mental health professionals if treatment is started early; but because people feel that mental illness equals crazy, they don’t talk about it or seek help.

Research show that 90% of suicides results from mental illness like, anxiety disorder, and depression. How does talk therapy from a Life Coach, social worker or Psychologist such as yourself help patients?

Talk therapy allows the client to feel listened to and understood.  It allows them to download and get advise.  It can save many from suicide.

 

How would you help someone suffering from, anxiety disorder?

Mental illness is something that keeps a lot of people up at night but nobody wants to talk about during the day

It is the visitor who enters without knocking

1 in 20 become disabled by mental illness i.e. Can’t function in society

So let’s start talking.

ANXIETY, has become the defining mental health issue of our decade — women are affected at twice the rate of men, and now children and young adults are also more stressed and anxious than ever before. Join us to learn nutritional and gut solutions for your anxiety!

 

Additional Resources

Drug and Alcohol Treatment for Women with Trauma

https://blog.myhelps.us/understanding-and-managing-compulsive-behaviors/

https://blog.myhelps.us/call-me-an-addict-child-abuse-statistics-p3/

https://adaa.org/understanding-anxiety/suicide

https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/kc/suicidal-thoughts-ideation-193026

5 Keys to Successful Self Leadership

Self Leadership

Success in life depends on your ability for, self leadership. You may say I am not a, leader, I am not a manager or a CEO true; but, self leadership, is more important than how many people you lead in your home or place of work.

Self leadership, is the answer to how do we develop ourselves to survive and thrive in a Volatile, Uncertain, Complex, and Ambiguous world.

Self leadership,  is the Critical Success Factor for individual and organizational success.

Here are 5 Essential Disciplines for Self Leadership 

Discipline #1 Accountability
You must learn to take full responsibility for everything on your watch. This means that the fish stinks from the head down! A great way to do this is with, self leadership, because those who follow you are watching your, leadership.

Discipline # 2 Focus
As a, Leader, you will wear many hats. Success comes from knowing where to focus your attention. Everything is important.
Acquiring the skill of discrimination allows the, leader, to discern what is most important and least important.

Discipline # 3 Organizational self leadership 

Organizational, self leadership,  is the skill through which chaos is turned into order.

Discipline # 4 Innovation
As a, leader, you will begin to consciously focus your attention and discriminate where the maximum leverage is.
You will recognize the need for continual improvement and for innovation in your processes.

Discipline # 5 Communication Skills 

Communication skills, are evident in how well you communicate your passion, vision, and mission to your employees, customers and self.

Here are 3 types of Communication Skills

The three primary means of communication are verbal, nonverbal, and visual.
  • Verbal Communication. Verbal communication depends on words to deliver meaning.
  • Nonverbal Communication. Nonverbal communication occurs when meaning or messages are sent or received without the use of words like body language.
  • Visual Communication.
Daphne Lynn Valcin is a business coach and speaker.

Daphne’s talks to us about the keys to a successful mission driven life or business.
Since 90% of startup businesses fail, Daphne believes that the quality of life and business, leadership, is at the root of success or failure.
She believes that, leadership, is about using the most effective strategies to conquer obstacles while taking consistent steps to move forward when tackling your vision, whether that vision is within the workplace, as a leader of a business or, self leadership.

Show notes:
. Daphne explains what is true, self leadership.
. What sets successful startup businesses apart from those that fail.
. How a business coach helps clients.
. What does a thriving business look like.
. What are some of the biggest mistakes companies do with their sales and marketing efforts.
. What are some of the characteristics of successful leaders.

Here are 11 strategies for effective, self leadership,  from Young Entrepreneur Council:

Leadership advice from Dale Carnegie

When managing my team, I use a tactic from Dale Carnegie: Think in terms of the other person’s wants. The goal is to align a team member’s natural talents and preferences with the company’s goals. What do they want? What motivates them? What do they like to do? Then manage them to reinforce what they want and how they can achieve those things through their work.

Additional Resources

How to Set up Your Business Structure as an Entrepreneur

How to Consciously Plan Personal Growth

personal growth

As a Life Coach, I know that the secret to, personal growth,  is to consciously plan for it. It doesn’t just happen.  We all know the acorn lives in the oak tree!  But unlike the Oak tree, personal growth, is not pre-programmed into your DNA. You need to have a plan for, personal growth.

“You can’t see the picture if you are the frame”~ Les Brown

Hire a, Life coach, invest in you!. A, Life coach, is able to Help you see the entire picture.

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Personal Growth Podcast

Introduction to Personal Growth

Think about it. When you were growing up, your pediatrician would have you stand by a growth chart and he was able to determine how healthy you were by your growth as it related to his growth chart.

In a similar way, you can determine your professional health by your, personal growth, chart.
Did you stop growing and learning when you left school? The secret to, personal growth, is that you have to plan to grow every day?

That management promotion you are asking God for will not come if you don’t proactively do the work to acquire the skills. That spouse or healthy relationship will not come unless you proactively work at becoming the best you. Your business will not grow unless you have a growth plan, commonly called a business plan.

Below is Starbucks proactive plans for, Personal  Growth:

The People’s Republic Of Starbucks
Speaking last month at an investors’ conference in Seattle, Belinda Wong, head of Starbucks in China, said the company was opening an outlet every day on average in the world’s second-largest economy.

“This year we have a higher ambition,” she told shareholders. “We will open on average one store every 18 hours.”

The company just opened its 1,500th outlet in the country, considered a milestone for the company that views China as a major source of growth this year. It wants 3,000 outlets by 2019, compared with its current 11,000 in the U.S.
Unlike in the U.S., Starbucks in China targets affluent cosmopolitan professionals and students, and puts stores near where they shop, study or work.
“Starbucks’ China and Asia-Pacific region is one of the new target areas for the company, where it intends to focus its near-term growth. Starbucks,” said a research note from Trefis.

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5 Tips to Help You Meet Your, Business Goals,  by Entrepreneur.com magazine.

https://www.entrepreneur.com/article/246435

1. Define your projects.

The first and most important thing in, personal growth and development, is to figure out what projects you are dealing with. First, what is a project? My definition is anything that takes more than a few easy tasks to get done. Setting up that new sales software? That’s a project. Expanding your network? Yep, that’s a project, too. Growing your business? That’s a collection of projects!

Some of your, self improvement, projects will be pretty obvious, but others will lurk in the background unacknowledged. To unearth all of your projects, write down everything you’re currently working on and everything you want to be working on. Then, group that list around specific, personal growth,  goals.
That action will likely lead you to your project list. You may have 10 to 20 (or even more) projects on this list, but to be effective, you’ll want to pick the two to five projects that are most important, and focus on those for the remaining tips.

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2. Give your personal growth projects a start and end date.

You should know (or decide) when each, self improvement, project should start and end. This will allow you to sequence projects by prioritizing them based on when they need to start or be finished. Start and end dates will also allow you to plan around your own business cycles and prevent projects from going on for much longer than they should.

3. Make a one-page plan for Self Improvement

A little, personal growth and development, planning goes a long way to helping a project succeed. To create a one-page plan, jot down your answers or notes for each of the following questions:
• What problem will the project solve?
• What is the benefit to the organization?
• What kind of staff and budget do I need?
• What are the major milestones?
• What are the potential stumbling blocks?
• What risks does this project pose?
• What is my work, self improvement, plan (list of tasks or sub-items to be completed by when)?
• What are the specific metrics for success?
• How will you know the project is done?
Note: if you’re going to keep the plan to one page, your answers need to be relatively concise!

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4. Establish communication routines.

For any project that involves multiple team members, set up communication routines in advance. Will someone be reporting progress weekly? Monthly? Will there be a recurring call for all parties to check in? Who is responsible for checking on whether the project is meeting its milestones?

5. Know if and when to quit personal development

In the, personal development, space, it’s best to finish what you start, sometimes it’s necessary to pull the plug. If you have all of your projects laid out, with start and end dates and a clear one-page plan that includes milestones and communication guidelines, you should have all the information you need to know when to quit a project.
Certainly it’s not always easy to quit, especially if you’ve already committed a lot of time, energy and emotion. But if a, personal development,  project is dragging on.

Here are some questions that can help you think through whether or not to abandon your, personal development, Goals:

• Is the goal of this, personal growth,  project still important to my organization?
• What was the planned ROI for this project? What is the ROI now?
• What is my opportunity cost in working on this? Could I better achieve my goals by spending this time on other projects?
• What is the emotional toll of continuing with this project.

Finally, commit to Constant and Never Ending Improvement (CANI) that is, self improvement.

In my book “Out of the Snares” I share that as a Limousine Operator, I went to the National Limousine Association annual meeting in Las Vegas every year. Every year I would practice, personal growth and development, by learning from the best operators in the business on how to use technology, improve on services and expand on my products. That allowed me to have a 30% annual growth rate and win the Entrepreneur of the year award in 1998. My intention was to become the largest operator in the Greater Toronto area and have a fleet of over 100 limousines. The secret? A, personal growth, plan!.

“Reach for the moon, even if you miss, You will land among the Stars” ~ Les Brown

The Importance of Constant and Never-Ending Improvement required for, personal growth

• Sometimes when you’re prepared to step out and be different you’re going to cop some criticism
• Don’t wait until you’ve got everything 100% right before you get started. Get it 80% right and then continue to improve it as you go
• By being different – you will also be memorable!
• Have high targets to stretch you for, personal growth.  They said man would never land on the moon…but he did. If you don’t aim high, you’ll never get where you want to be.
• Fear is what stops you from setting what people would say are ‘unrealistic goals’
• The famous Australian Cricket batsman, Sir Donald Bradman had this philosophy every time he came out to bat: I’m going to hit it for 6! If I don’t get a 6, then I may get a 4. If I don’t get a 4 then I’ll get either a 3 or a 2 or a 1. But at least I’ll get something!
• The average Real Estate Agent in earns $23,000 – $24,000. You can’t afford to be average!
• It’s not about selling…it’s about people. Be a people-helper because that is the key to your success in sales
• A Real Estate client’s lifetime value is $127,000.  If you look after them and keep in contact with them. What’s the lifetime value of your clients?
• Provide a guarantee for your clients and this will give you the edge over your competition
• If you’re prepared to step out and take risks – and overcome your fears – you will become a leader in your industry
• Develop your daily rituals of success
• Exercise will help you keep your stress levels low and enable you to be more productive
• We spend too much time wasting our time – and not improving ourselves
• Shut up and listen! Really listen! If you can’t work out your client’s needs in the first 10 – 15 minutes, then you shouldn’t be in sales
• Honesty and Transparency are crucial to long term success
• Serve others and not yourself

Adobe Photoshop PDF

Pick up your copy of “Out of the Snares” and understand the how having a, Life coach, can help you grow intentionally by helping you see the “Picture in the Frame” . Learn how to get motivated by your passion and natural abilities. “Out of the Snares” is the story of my vision to become a US citizen and my journey to leaving a Legacy for my children. The secret to my growth was I committed to constant and never ending improvement.

Order your copy today.https://myhelps.us/book-order/

Trying to see the picture? Need help understanding your DNA and what is in your seed? Let me Help you.

Additional Resources

7 Strategies to Personal Growth

How to Awaken to Your Soul Purpose

Soul purpose

Your, soul purpose, is to awaken to consciousness and have a human experience through your body. Your, soul, or spirit is eternal.

Welcome to the mindset transformation radio show and podcast. Today’s show is very special to me! I am going to share with you an interview with Neale Donald Walsh, author of, “The Conversations with God,” series on, “How to Awaken Your Soul’s Purpose,”
This is special to me because his book revealed deep truths to me. My eyes were opened in wonderment!
Here are some of the revelations from the book “The Conversations with God’

Truths about Prayer and Soul Purpose 

When you pray in order for your prayer to be received by God it must be in a frequency that he can hear. Just as you cannot hear this radio program if my words were not modulated to be transported over the communication lines and then demodulated back so that you can hear them. It is the same way that prayer works. Except the modulator is faith. Jesus never healed anyone who did not have faith. He said “Your faith has made you whole” So if you are asking God to grand you the desires of your heart and you don’t believe that he will, your prayers will never be answered unless it is connected to your, soul purpose.

The other part of the prayer mechanics is this:
You will not have that which you ask, nor anything you want because your request is a statement of lack.
Saying you want a thing only works to produce that precise experience – wanting- in your reality.
Abraham of the Law of Attraction books teaches the same thing.
You have to see yourself in position of the thing you want and not what you don’t want, because if you think of what you don’t want, that is exactly what you will attract and that will show up. Wondering why you keep attracting the same no good man into your experience? That is because you are so detailed in what you don’t want in a man and the Universe complies!

So when you pray you must engage faith and thank God for giving you the desires of your heart and your, soul purpose. You need to tell him all the things you do want in a man. Be just as detailed and then believe him for it. Walk in it. Believe that you already have such a man!

Truths about Relationships and Purpose 

It is only through your relationship with people, places and events that you can exist in the universe. You are only who you are, relative to what another person is not. That is why opposites attract! Your, soul, is always looking for its counterpart to complete itself!

When human relationships fail (and they never really fail, they just did not produce the result you wanted), is because they were entered into for reasons not beneficial to their survival and, soul purpose.
The, purpose, of a relationship is to decide what part of yourself you would like to see show up not what part of another you can capture and hold.  This revelation made me look at the, purpose, of my marriage from Gods eyes.
The good news is that this marriage survived when the others failed because it had a purpose. One of them was to reveal myself to me.

Truths about Abundance and Soul Purpose 

What is an abundant mindset?
Let’s say that you are walking down the road one day and you see a homeless person begging on the street corner. You go into your wallet and notice you have $7, a $5dollar bill and 2 singles. You start to give the homeless person the $5 bill but decide instead to get him the 2 singles. Why did you change your mind about giving the $5 bill? Was it because you felt that it was too much money to part with? Did you feel that you needed it more than the homeless person?

None of these answers suggest an abundant mindset. You are operating from a spirit of lack.
The most rapid way to change a root thought or sponsoring idea is to reverse the thought-word-deed process.
Do the deed that you want to have the new thought about, then say the words that you want to have the new thought about. Do this often and you’ll train the mind to think a new way.
You are what you think you are. When the thought is a negative one, you have to find a way to break out of the cycle. So much of your present experience is based on your previous thought.

Abundance Mindset and Purpose

Let’s say You need $5000 more to close on your new home. You receive a message from God to give $2000 to a sister in the church who just lost her house in a fire. You obey because you have faith that your God is able. Your common sense tells you that you are stupid and that you will never get the money back; but you act on Gods promise. You use the words that God will provide the increase.
He does, a few days later; a check for $10,000 shows up in the mail.
I listened to a message from Joyce Meyers a few weeks back, she shared a similar story. She said that she was broke and laying in bed age her Breast cancer surgery feeling very fearful about her financial situation. Both she and her husband was in full time ministry and depended on her ability to preach for their income. She wouldn’t be able to work for some time.
Then the doorbell rang and someone brought her a check for $10,000. Someone she did not know, but who God sent. From that moment, onward she did not operate out of fear or lack, she knew that God was able. When you are on a journey that matches your, soul purpose, miracles happen.

Soul expressions

When was the last time you cried with joy, wrote poetry, made music, danced in the rain, baked a pie, painted anything, fixed something that was broken, kissed a baby, held a cat to your face, kissed your dog, swam naked, walked at sunrise, played a harmonica, talked till dawn, made love for hours on a beach or in the woods, communed with nature, searched for God, sat alone in silence, or traveled to the deepest part of your being?
When was the last time you said hello to your, soul?
Wow! After reading this I made note to say hello to my, soul, more often. I need to go skinny dipping at the beach, I need to dance in the rain and make love for hours in the woods!

So how do you awaken to your soul purpose?

Your, soul, doesn’t care what you do for a living, the, soul, only cares what you are being, while you are doing what you are doing.

The function of the, soul, is to indicate its desire, not impose it.
The function of the mind is to choose from its alternatives.
The function of the body is to act out that choice.
Your, soul, has brought you to the words you are reading or listening to right now.

How I found my, soul purpose.

One day I was reading a local newspaper. Who reads newspapers these days? I never did. But this day now only did a newspaper appear in my space; but I was guided to pick it up and flip through the pages. In one of the pages was a photograph of someone I thought I recognized so I stopped to look at it. It had her name and the title beside her name, Life coach! I had never seen that word before or heard it anywhere but I knew immediately that was what I was supposed to do.
My, soul, has been directing me all my life. It always brings me to where I need to be and the people I need to be with.

True masters are those who have chosen to make a life, rather than a living.

Life’s irony is that as soon as worldly goods and worldly success are of no concern to you, the way is open for them to flow to you.
I do this for free! Open the windows of heaven Lord!

There comes a time in the evolution of every, soul, when the chief concern is no longer the survival of the physical body, but the growth of the, spirit; no longer the attainment of worldly success but the realization of self.

The goal and, purpose, of your, soul, is to fully realize itself while in your body. To become the embodiment of all that it really is.

Listen to the author Neale Donald Walsh go into detail

You could also listen on iTunes. Please remember to subscribe.

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web: www.myrnayounghelps.com

If you are interested in being a guest on the Transform Your Mind radio TV and podcast, please contact me on the web @ www.myhelps.us or complete the Guest questionnaire and email back to me.

Additional Resources

How to Accelerate Your Soul Journey: Clear these Money Blocks

How to Program Yourself for Positive Change

positive change

Positive change, is identifying the things that are most important in your life, and then start eliminating everything else. This is all about simplifying your life, so that you can focus on the things that matter most to you and prevents you from getting distracted.

 

Here are some tips on Positive Change from the book “Switch”

How to, change, things when, change, is hardby Chip Heath and Dan Heath

Here are the facts:

Change, is a process.

1: Positive Change, is usually a situation problem, and not a personal problem.
2: For anything to, change, someone must behave differently.
3: To, change, someone’s behavior, you must, change, someone’s situation.
4: For, positive change, to stick you must influence the person’s heart and mind.

A Story on Positive Change

Arthur was an airborne paratrooper. Jumping out of airplanes killed his knees, his back, his legs. When he got out of the army he walked with a cane and couldn’t do anything so he gained a lot of weight. He could not support his weight, so he couldn’t do traditional exercise. His health rapidly declined. The doctor at the VA clinic told him to accept his faith, that he would never walk normal again.

One day while surfing the internet, he came across Diamond Dallas Page doing yoga. He said to himself, I could do this. So He bought the DVD! He figured he could use his arm to support his weight and get a cardio workout. Arthur was 297 lbs when he started doing yoga.
When he started his yoga exercises, he kept falling down and falling down, but he kept getting back up again and again!
Every day he got better and better in 10 months he had lost over 100 lbs and could not only walk without a cane but he could run!!

Change, is usually situational. Arthur had a situational problem.

Arthur taught himself to do yoga because he decided to take control of his life. He got his heart and mind in the game and changed the situation!

Change is a process.

To lead a process requires persistence. Arthur kept getting back up and trying again to do his exercises.

When a, positive change, starts, it builds on itself.
The better Arthur got at yoga, the more he was motivated to keep going.
Positive change,  can snowball.
Change, rarely works unless it is motivated by feeling. Arthur wanted to feel better about himself so he made the hard choices.

That’s my tip of the week from coach Myrna.

How to change when change is hard.

There can be nothing harder than trying to loose 100 lbs when you can’t use your legs; but Arthur found a way and so can you.

Our guest today is coach Dan Willms and he is a, positive change, guru. This is his space.

Dan Willms is a Life & Business Coach, an MBA Professor, a facilitator for The Leadership Challenge, a writer and an International Speaker – he is also the creator of the Positive Change Workshop and facilitates his workshops in Portuguese, English & Spanish. He has facilitated more than 118 Positive Change Workshops. He loves helping people and organizations to achieve their fullest potential. He is the co-author of the book Strategic Leadership (Liderança Estratégica) and the author of the upcoming book “Positive Change – One life @ a time”.

Dan is also my partner, we do a video blog on YouTube every week called “You asked for it” where we answer questions sent in from our social media network. Like us on Facebook to become part of our community. Myrna Young Lifecoach and Dan Willms.

Using I am Affirmations for Positive change

I am affirmations, formulate, affirm, and perpetuate the stories you tell yourself. Stories about who you are, who you can be, and what you can do. I Am affirmations, are a powerful way to, program yourself, for, positive change.

If you want to make a, change, start where you are. Start with who you are. Support yourself right here, before you have all the answers. Do that and you’ll feel more supported in the process. And that can, change, well, everything.

  1. I am a living, breathing example of the kind of world I want to live in.
  2. I am a powerful force for good in the world.
  3. I am on the right path. I am moving in the right direction.
  4. I am worthy of all things wonderful.
  5. I am being guided to what’s best for me and everyone else.
  6. I am powerful enough to live in accordance with my own values, desire, and truths.
  7. I am in the exact place I need to be to get to where I want to be.
  8. I am intentionally promoting a life filled with joy.
  9. I am a firm believer in my ideas.

Show notes Positive Change

Question 1. Tell us about your journey to becoming a Life coach and an ambassador for, positive change.
Question 2: What is The, Positive Change?
Question 3: Tell me about your happiness labs, how does it work?
Question 4: : What were your findings on these labs from your sample size of 400 people?
Question 5: So, based on your labs, what would you say is the secret to happiness?
Question 6: Why do you think is there so much unhappiness in the world?

Additional Resources

How to Transform your Career with Purpose

Do Not be Defeated: If You Build It They Will Come

If you build it they will come

If You Build It They Will Come,  How many of you have seen the movie, Field of Dreams. In my book: Out of the Snares, a story of hope and encouragement, Chapter 7 is called, If you Build it they will come.

Iowa farmer Ray Kinsella hears a voice in his corn field tell him, If you build it they will come. He interprets this message as an instruction to build a baseball field on his farm, upon which appear the ghosts of Shoeless Joe Jackson and the other seven Chicago White Sox players banned from the game for throwing the 1919 World Series. When the voices continue, Ray seeks out a reclusive author to help him understand the meaning of the messages and the purpose for his field.

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All his life, Ray Kinsella was searching for his, field of dreams. Then one day, his, field of dreams,  came looking for him.

If you believe the impossible, the incredible can come true.

The, field of dreams, says, If you build it they will come.

Here are a few men who believed, If you Build it they will come

  1. Steve Jobs built Apple computers
    2. Henry Ford built the 8-cylinder engine
    3. Thomas Edison built the light bulb.

These are just a few examples of men who dared to dream and build something that would serve others.

But this phrase does not only apply to baseball fields and technology.
Anything you build, they will come. If you build IT they will come, the IT can be anything you can think of.
Put another way

 “whatever your plant will grow. Learn to reap where you plant

Whatever you put your attention on, increases.

What is your, field of dreams?

What are the voices in your dreams telling you to build?

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In my book “Out of the Snares” the voices in my head, my field was “my promised land”

The voices in my dreams kept telling me, if I built it they will come.  My promised land, I would leave a Legacy for my children.

I have internalized this phrase. It has become my truth. I know without a shadow of doubt, that if I build it they will come. Anything I build, they will come.

As a Life coach and motivational speaker, I am building my business now. I built my radio show and podcast and now I have listeners around the world. I have built my brand on LinkedIn, Twitter, Instagram, Facebook. I blog several times per month. I have authored 3 books.

https://myhelps.us/books/

 

This is how I am building, and they are coming.

Here is a story to illustrate, that if you build it they will come. It is about the mother of a Downs Syndrome child who wanted to attend college. The College had to build a program for inclusion of special needs students. They built it, and the students came, proving, that, if you build it they will come.

Several years ago, a young woman attending a special needs graduate course there piped up at the end of class and asked her professor, “What is this college doing for inclusion?” The professor thought a moment and then turned it into a homework assignment (“The other students hated me,” she laughed.): Design and write out what you think a college program for special needs should look like. If ,Field of Dreams, taught us anything, If you build it they will come.

The students designed what became the University Participant (UP) Program, a fully inclusive 2-year program–full residence, dorms, classes, work, support, communication, goals, accountability–and soon found one student with special needs who wanted to come. “We were building the airplane as we were flying it,” Dr. Kelly Kelley remembers. “So you built it,” I asked, “but how did you fund it?” “Passion,” she quickly answered. Speaking of passion, let me explain how I landed in North Carolina last week. Right before Nella’s birthday this year, I received an e-mail from Liz, another mom of a little girl with Down syndrome.

I had written a post expressing interest in organizations helping adults with Down syndrome, specifically in relation to post-secondary educational opportunities. Liz responded, telling me about Ruby’s Rainbow, the organization she and her husband had just started in 2011, providing scholarships for people with Down syndrome to attend college. In four years, Ruby’s Rainbow has already helped fund 42 people’s college dreams. The thing is, a lot of people don’t realize that “people with Down syndrome attending college” is even a phrase. And how can we raise money for it if people don’t know it exists? I wanted to help bring attention to the incredible work Liz and Ruby’s Rainbow is doing, but I was also curious–what does this even look like? One phone call with Liz, and we were scheming.

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Let’s go to college. Let’s go visit two Ruby’s Rainbow scholarship recipients and let them tell the story. Let’s peek into the window of possibilities for our own girls. Let’s see what can happen when one person begins with a question: “What are we doing to help? “ Thanks to an incredibly accommodating college that quickly set up a full day’s agenda to give us a thorough day-in-the-life experience, and two individuals who were eager to share their story with us, we were on our way early Wednesday morning last week to make the two-hour drive from our hotel to Cullowhee, North Carolina. Our first stop: The Office of Residential Living where Zach gets paid to work 10 hours a week as an office assistant to supplement his college experience. A handsome young man, sharply dressed, stepped away from his computer to greet us when we arrived. He shook our hands and introduced himself, answered our questions about what he does and paused to answer the phone when it rang or tend to the front desk when his office mate asked for help.

Now some of you know that sometimes, okay most times, especially for startup companies “You build it, they do Not come.”

This article talks about Entrepreneurship and building a new company. Building and they not come.
https://www.entrepreneur.com/article/251900

Sometimes you have to go get the clients instead of waiting for them to come.

Here is an excerpt that displays If you build it they will come

I am not sure my version of this quote would have worked for Kevin Costner and the movie, Field of Dreams, but it would certainly have saved countless entrepreneurs from disappointment and defeat.
There’s no shortage of savvy startups that will never get off the ground or designer duds that won’t grace the catwalk. Just because a product is out there doesn’t guarantee that consumers will come. Great ideas without equally great promotion are as good as non-existent.
It’s just like the age old question?

If a tree falls in a forest and no one is around to hear it, does it still make a sound?

The same can be said for great ideas and products. If consumers never discover or buy them, are they still great? I have fallen victim to the false pretense that if I only built something, consumers would come right over and consume it. But my first failed business taught me otherwise.
At the ripe old age of 21, I managed to convince two successful entrepreneurs — after multiple pitch meetings and business plan revisions — to invest in my media company, despite the fact that I knew nearly nothing about media.

What I wanted was to create the leading online men’s lifestyle magazine, complete with highlights on where to eat, what to wear, where to travel — and I called it Debonair. The idea was much more novel in the early 2000’s before the flood of publications now devoted to gents — and the idea was good (Thrills and Urban Daddy launched similarly oriented sites shortly after to much success).
They wrote me a check for $100,000 and just like that I was in business. But contrary to my mistaken notion, it wasn’t as simple as having the seed money, building the site and just watching everything fall into place. I believed that, if you build it they will come. I wasn’t popping champagne and toasting with the big boys like I thought I’d be. Not even close. The next two years were trying times, and I was swimming in a sea of startups that knew more than I did.

I poured every dollar I had into a fancy website with what I believed were all the right bells and whistles and pricey photography that had made glossy magazines so sought after and I figured that was all it would take. When the traffic didn’t come, I blamed it on the site design, the logo, the font, the layout, the photos. I became victim to the “better is the enemy of best” syndrome, redoing the same thing over and over and over again trying to perfect it for the public. By the time I bypassed the fluff changes and figured out search engine optimization, pay-per-click, buying lists and marketing — it was too late.
I lost every last cent of my seed money, and Debonair flopped.

If you build it they will come so become a visionary

Five years later, I tried again. This time with Sourcing Journal, a trade publication.
Unless your jeans have three legs, it isn’t a new idea. If you want to build a brand, build it. Forget the wealthy heirs to family businesses or those who get large venture capital funding. If that isn’t you, like it wasn’t me, you will have to be a doer and figure it out. Go get some orders, no matter what product you have. Borrow money for purchase order financing to produce the product and pay the too-high rates if need be. Be scrappy, be an entrepreneur, make it happen.

Focus on distribution. Technology has changed the game, so use it to help get the word out there, build hype and sell, sell, sell. Do not wait for the people to come because you could be waiting a long time. Knock down the proverbial door and keep going. And when you get that order from Barneys, or Macy’s or Bed Bath and Beyond, call me. I’d be happy to make that product for you.
Not because you built it, but because you got it built it, and they did not come. hem to come proving that, if you build it they will come.

Here Are Five Reasons That, If You Build It They Will Come.

1. Make sure that there is a need for what you are building. If you are a startup company. Do your research, know the demographics of your target market.
2. Be prepared to keep at it until you win. If something does not work, change your approach. If that does not work, change it again. Keep changing your approach until you win. There is a winning solution and that is, lucid dreaming! Most people give up when success is just around the corner. Don’t let fear sidetrack you.
3. You must see the vision. If you don’t see it, you can never be positive that you will win. It will be like a pie in the sky. Something hoped for, but unattainable.
4. You must have a burning desire to win. You live the phrase “failure is not an option.” The desire must consume you. There is no better example of this than the Sylvester Stallone story. Sylvester refused $100,000 for his script “Rocky” when he had no money to eat. He then sold his dog for $50.00 to buy food. His burning desire was to star in his screen play. He built it and they came!
5. Keep hitting the Anvil. Do something every day that brings you closer to your “field of dreams.”

Additional Resources:

https://blog.myhelps.us/principle-1-keep-your-vision-in-front-of-you/

How Women Get a Seat at the Table

black women get a seat at the table

Women are you invisible in the boardroom and have no say? Do men listen when you speak? If the answer is no, then find out how to get, a seat at the table.

In this episode I interview Kimberley Bussey Lewis, Author of , A Seat At The Table, Or Part Of The Meal: Creating A Culture Of Diversity

How did you come to become passionate about, diversity and inclusion, for, women of color?

How to Get a Seat at The Table

I first really started thinking about, a seat at the table,  when I was a very young reporter in Charleston, South Carolina.  I was the only female reporter at the time within this 600 person company.  And what I was struck by is that there were so many decisions that were being made that we would complain about; but none of us had, a seat at the table, to help make those decisions.

I realized that if I didn’t have a place in the room that I was both invisible and silent; so it didn’t matter how much I complained or how much I didn’t like what was going on or simply just didn’t understand it because I was not part of the discussion; I needed, a seat at the table.

So that’s where my passion for, diversity and inclusion, was born.

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CNN wrote a column on getting, a seat at the table, for women. They were discussing congresswoman Harris, basically what they’re saying was that women are invisible and they have no say.  When they speak no one listens.  So I understand what you are saying.

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What happens when there is no seat at the table

I stayed in that company as a reporter without, a seat at the table, about 12 years.  It took me that long to get that awakening.  Sometimes we think that we are fortunate to have a job so we don’t want to stir the pot.  I just increasingly became more and more of a little rebel challenging the status quo. Eventually I left  and ventured out to write my first book.   I was scared to death.  Because here I am I’m going to write a book, I’m going to leave my job.  I took a leave of absence to write the book;  but it was really a step of faith and in writing the book and doing the research.

I became energized when I interviewed older relatives, my mother and great-aunt who were already in their 80s and 90s at the time. I  became energized by their tenacity as, Black women. I knew that we had a lot of strong men in my family, but my eyes are really flew open at the strength of the, black women, and how they held businesses up,  they held a family up and the men of the family up, and brought us all together.

I stumbled into the nonprofit arena by my volunteer work. I was volunteering and working on writing the  book and one thing led to another.  I got to a small job at an organization that was run by a, black woman, who became my mentor.  She took me under her wing and even though I was  just volunteering she taught me so much about strength and tenacity and making your voice count.

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Diversity and Inclusion for Women of Color

Her company was called Family Assistance Management Services

And she was the first black female insurance broker in SC. She had been a full time teacher before she built quite a nest egg with her husband. They owned several pieces of property in Charleston SC. She then became a broker and started several businesses, an insurance company, a computer training clinic all kinds of other businesses, because she had a passion for helping people.

You got your feet wet on the nonprofit arena and but it sounds like you have, a seat at the table, at Goodwill Industries. Why you write the book, “A Seat at the Table or a part of the meal?”

I was born in September 1964 a month after the discrimination Act, and my parents had not long moved to Charleston, SC. All of my siblings, I  have one brother and two sisters, they had all been born at home in the country by a midwife so since it was now illegal for place public places to discriminate my father thought, well I will take my wife to this nice Hospital for my fourth child to be born.  So my mother was in labor he rushes her down to this hospital the Medical University of South Carolina and by this time she’d begun to hemorrhage as I was a breech baby.

It was pouring down rain and he got my mom into the emergency area into the lobby and he started screaming for the doctors to come and help they turned looked at them and turned their backs right away.  All the white doctors and nurses ignored them, so he ran up to them and screamed my wife is bleeding you got to help her and someone told him to just sit down we’ll get to you.

So he scooped her up, put her in a wheelchair and ran with her down the street to the black Hospital. McLennan banks Hospital in the pouring rain with my mom gripping for life on that wheelchair.  He pushed her up into the emergency area and as soon as they saw that she was drenched in blood they rushed her into the emergency room and delivered me.  The doctor who delivered me was a, woman of color, from  South Africa and he named me Kimberly after the Kimberly diamond mines.

Black Women are born to be at the table

It sounds like you were born in to do this work!

I was tried of being the only, Black woman, in the room. I felt we as, Black women, have to do something to get , a seat at the table. If anyone was going to wave that flag of, diversity and inclusion, equity and of, diversity, it should be Goodwill Industries. So it really began then.  We started a task force with a group of CEOs and started to study, diversity and inclusion, and equity programs with fortune 500 companies and fortune 100 companies and other nonprofit organizations. We studied who was doing it well, what were they looking at, what were the metrics and how do you build that diverse pipeline.  We came up an implementation plan.

We were really intentional about attracting, maintaining and keeping a, diversity, workforce.  Whether it is individuals who are Hispanic or individuals who African-American or LGTBQ or disabled.  We recognize that all of that build a table of, diversity.

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The first time that I heard the phrase, a seat at the table, was from one of my coaching clients and I’ve heard it several times since. I heard Gabrielle Union say it that she’s just gonna make her own table because you know the black actresses in Hollywood are still working to, get a seat at the table.  They go through the same discrimination with, diversity and inclusion.  It’s not just in Corporate America or in the board rooms.

Women of Color getting a seat at the table

Kimberly you have, a seat at the table,  what advice would you give to women who are hitting the glass ceiling and get, no seat at the table.

African-American women unfortunately have been absent from the room!  We have not even been invited into the room much less have, a seat at the table, for quite some time.  Women in general have been hitting the glass ceiling for quite a long time.  I’ve heard that men are hired based on what their hiring manager or that supervisor thinks that they can do while women are hired or promoted based on performance.  it is that way because the majority of the, seats at the table, are already held by men.  Predominantly white males and they look for men who look like act like they came from where they come from.

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Black women in order to get, a seat at the table,  have to do 3 things:

  1. They have to network. It’s all about relationships. Else there is, no seat at the table. Everything that you do is about relationships and it’s about networking.  If you didn’t grow up playing golf, learn.  Go around places and do things that make you feel uncomfortable. But you must be part of the conversation. Go to the theater,  go to the Opera, you could serve as an usher and get free tickets.
  2. Get a mentor – All women should have a mentor.
  3. Get a Sponsor – a sponsor and a mentor are two different people. A mentor is someone that you can talk to about your fears and your aspirations. A mentor can give you sound advice and can talk you through some of the issues that you’re having and help you create a plan a plan of attack.

A sponsor on the other hand is going to be that person who’s going to make sure that you’re invited to that meeting.  They’re going to take you under their wing.  They’re going to make sure that there’s a place for you in the conversation and that there is, diversity and inclusion, that you are a part of the discussion. Sponsors are usually white males.

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Book: Seat at the table

Have you ever wished that you had the information to elevate the conversation at work on how to build a culture of diversity, equity and inclusion?  Well, now you do; with my newly published book A Seat At The Table or Part of the Meal, by Kimberly Bussey Lewis.  This book will give you examples of intentional efforts that will level the playing field and yield dividends for your career and your company. The book can be found on Amazon – A Seat at the Table Or Part of the Meal, by Kimberly Bussey Lewis or on www.motivationalmuse.com, so get your copy today and your seat at the table.

 

Additional Resources, A Seat at the Table

https://blog.myhelps.us/how-transform-your-career-with-purpose/

How to Ask for a Raise or Anything you Want in Life.

What are the, Secrets to Success,? Here are my 10 Secrets

https://www.demos.org/research/taking-our-seat-table-black-women-overcoming-social-exclusion-politics#Black-Women%E2%80%99s-Leadership:-Making-a-Way-out-of-No-Way

https://www.talentintelligence.com/blog/bid/377611/inclusion-and-the-benefits-of-diversity-in-the-workplace

 

The Events in Life Work Together for Your Good

Events in life work together for your good

The bible promises in Jeremiah 29:11 “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” That means that every challenge, trauma, disappointment, in life,  works together, for your good.

In “Out of the Snares” the book, I introduce my book with these words:

The greatest gift we can give others is hope. Somewhere out there someone is going through a storm of great magnitude; the pain is so great that they are considering suicide.

The purpose of this book “Out of the Snares,” is to give such a person, Hope. Hope that God promises “all things, in life, work together, for your good.”

Hope, that like the caterpillar that goes through the darkness before turning into a butterfly, your storm is designed to make you stronger, to cook you into a diamond so that God can use you to encourage others.

The darkness in life is meant to show you the way

As you come out of darkness and into God’s light, you become self-sufficient and proactive instead of reactive. Think about it. Just as the caterpillar does not know, when he is a caterpillar he will ultimately become a butterfly; when you are in your darkness, you don’t believe this you will ever see the light. “Out of the Snares” is written to remind you that the darkest part of the night is just before dawn. Joy does indeed come in the morning.

You have to walk by,  faith. Faith,  is defined as “the ability to trust the outcome of a thing even though you can’t see it.” I am the evidence. God has brought me from a mighty long way. I have achieved every goal that I set for myself and I am working on the next goal right now. Every event in my life, worked together, for my good.

In this book “Out of the Snares” I share with you, my readers, the principles of the Bible and the Universal Laws or Truths that I stood on to win. Order your copy today.https://myhelps.us/book-order/

Events in life work for your good Joseph’s story

The principle of God working all things together for good is well illustrated in the Old Testament account of Joseph’s life. Early in Joseph’s life, Joseph’s jealous brothers sold him into slavery. In Egypt, Joseph rises to a position of responsibility. Then, he is unjustly imprisoned and forgotten about by his friends. God gifts him the ability to interpret dreams, and through that ability Joseph is once again raised to a place of honor and power. When drought forces Joseph’s brothers to seek food elsewhere, they travel to Egypt and encounter Joseph, who eventually saves them from starvation and grants them a livelihood in his new land.

Throughout his life, Joseph trusted God no matter his good or bad circumstances. Joseph experienced plenty of bad things: kidnapping, slavery, false accusations, wrongful imprisonment, rejection, and famine. But in the end God brought things to a wonderful, life-affirming conclusion. God blessed Joseph’s entire family through those painful circumstances and through Joseph’s faith. (You can read about Joseph’s life beginning in Genesis 37.)

Romans 8:28 is a promise for believers. Real believers. Those who are living for Christ. Not those who claim to believe in God but are living like the devil.

This verse says to those who love God and are doing their best to obey his commands, “Even though bad/sad/evil/wicked things will happen to you, in life,  God will use them to, work together, for your good, both, in your life, and in the world.”

Additional Resources

Nothing is Impossible: How to Turn Life’s Challenges Into Opportunity

Do You Have A Child Sexual Abuse Story? Break the Silence

child sexual abuse

What does, child sexual abuse, look like? It is the face of innocence interrupted.
Millions of children are victims of, sexual abuse, every year from people they trust. Fathers, brothers, uncles, family friends, their mothers boyfriends…the list goes on.

The, BTS documentary,  is shining a light on this issue with their documentary, “Breaking the Silence.”

This documentary, “Breaking the Silence,” aired on the TLC network. This one-hour special featured interviews with people and children impacted by, sexual abuse, including two members of RAINN’s Speakers Bureau, survivors Ter-rae Lee and David Moody, as well as survivor-advocate Erin Merryn, the force behind Erin’s Law.

Child Sexual Abuse Cheryl Burke

One of the speakers on the program was Cheryl Burke of Dancing with the Stars fame. Cheryl shared her, child sexual abuse, story. She was a victim of, sexual abuse,  by her kinder-garden school teacher at the tender age of 6 years. She shares how that experience has shaped her life and defined her subsequent choice in lovers.

Burke, 31, said the, sexual abuse, started when she was in kindergarten. She didn’t name anyone specifically, but said, “He would make me watch pornographic videos. He was kind of like that fatherly figure – I think he knew my weakness, that I was very insecure.

Burke, 31, said her parents had divorced and her father had moved away, so this man was tasked with watching her and took advantage.

“I couldn’t speak up for myself. It was hard for me to say no. In a weird way, it was like I didn’t want to hurt him,” the native Californian added.

The dancing star eventually had to testify against the man when she was 6, she said.

Facing your Abuser

“My mom was there holding my hand, I was shaking and there was my molester right in front of me. It was so terrifying to see him face to face. I remember taking a lot of breaks because I would just break down,” she said, adding it was dance that brought her back.

Some other famous, child sexual abuse,  survivors were Oprah Winfrey and Dr Maya Angelou. All three of these women overcame their childhood obstacles and went on to live remarkable lives, but some are not so fortunate. In my book “Out of the Snares, A story of hope and encouragement” I share my, child sexual abuse,  story and give my readers 10 life principles on how to not only overcome your childhood story; but how to succeed in spite of it.

Oprah’s Child Sexual Abuse story

The media mogul Oprah Winfrey recounted her own experiences with, sexual abuse, which included being raped at the age of nine.

“Anybody who has been verbally abused or, physically abused,  will spend a great deal of their life rebuilding their self esteem,” Winfrey said in front of 3,000 students.

She recounted being physically beaten as a child, saying it was a cultural experience many African- American children went through. She also said was raped and molested.

Winfrey talked about some of the positive aspects of her life: How she learned to read before she was three, how she wished to be Diana Ross, and how she skipped school because she wrote a note to her teacher.

Description of her happy times didn’t last, though.

“I grew up in an environment where children were seen and not heard,” she said.

“I was beaten regularly.”

One such beating, she said, stuck out in vividly in her mind.

“I went to a well to get some water and carry it in a bucket. And I was playing in the water with my fingers, and my grandmother had seen me out the window and she didn’t like it.

“She whipped me so badly that I had welts on my back and the welts would bleed. And then when I put on my Sunday dress, I was bleeding from the welts. And then she was very upset with me because I got blood on the dress.

“So then I got another whipping for getting blood on the dress.”

 

 

Here are the 10 Biblical and Universal Laws that can help readers rewrite their story of Child Sexual Abuse

1. Keep Your Vision in Front of you – Dare to dream big dreams and understand the principles of vision casting.
2. The events in your life whether good or bad, work together for good. Your, child sexual abuse, was your teachable moment. God said I know your expected end. Stay the course; don’t give up until you win.
3. Let the Universal Laws of Attraction, the Laws of Intention work for you – Ask and it will be given unto you.
4. Have a Positive Mind-set – Take control of your thoughts and attitudes. Get rid of ANTS (Automatic Negative Thoughts) from your, sexual abuse.
5. Use what you have in your hand- You were created with a purpose; God gave you the skills and talents you need to complete your task. Stop waiting for the right time.
6. Be intentional about your Growth- Be proactive, be intentional, build on your gifts, and continually improve.
7. If you build it, they will come. Be a servant first.
8. Find your Passion – it is the Fire in your belly. Become conscious of what lights you up. God put that Fire in your belly as a beacon to achieve your purpose. You can achieve your purpose in spite of your, child sexual abuse.
9. Love – it is what makes this Human experience worthwhile. Love yourself first. Love is spirit, God is spirit.
10. Business Consciousness – how to create a startup company and succeed in marketing.

Additional Resources

Surviving R. Kelly: The Mindset Of A Sexual Predator

What is the Connection between Sexual Abuse and Addiction?