How to Access God Through Worship

How to Access God through Worship

Worship, definitely brings access because, God loves, worship. He’s our creator and He loves it when we make time for Him. He wants us to actually, worship, and praise Him. To enter His gate with thanksgiving and His courts with praise.

Worship,  is one of my favorite topics. I have a very special relationship with, praise and worship. Whenever I’m in, worship, I’m so moved the feeling intimacy with, God. 

My guest today is Tricie Graham. This post is how to take your, worship, to the next level. My pastor would say a church without, worship, is like absent fire; because you need to bring the fire in your worship.

Book A Higher Place of Worship
Book A Higher Place of Worship

Listen to the full interview

 

Introduction to, Praise and Worship

Tricie Graham was born and raised in Detroit Michigan and now resides in Chicago Illinois. She grew up in a Pentecostal Church on the West side of Detroit as the daughter of an Assistant Pastor who later became a Pastor. As a dreamer and a seer, Tricie came to be acquainted with the prophetic at a very young age. Tricie now works alongside her husband Elliott Graham in Evangelism and outreach at Good Seed Ground Ministries.

Tricie is a prophetess, teacher, dream interpreter and intercessor trained in spiritual warfare. (That’s some good skills) She believes in the supernatural, God, of the Bible and has experienced miraculous encounters with, God. Tricie is passionate about helping others to achieve intimacy with, God, through a relationship with His son, Jesus Christ. She’s also a freelance writer and author of the book “A Higher Place of Worship”.

Introduction to A Higher Place of Worship

Myrna – Why did you write this book?  Tell us how this book came about and what was your inspiration for writing it?

Tricie – My inspiration for writing “A Higher Place of Worship” began with my recovery from COVID 19. I was sick in March. I was diagnosed with COVID 19. I was sick for about three weeks, I was really ill. During this sickness and even before then I was asking, God, what my next step in my life would be. Where do I go from here?

So as soon as I recovered from COVID 19, the Lord told me to go and revisit some notes from a message I had taught back in December of 2018. The message was on, worship. As I did that, I heard the Lord say that He wanted me to write a book on, worship.

Myrna – Tell us more about your, worship, message and why, God, wanted you to talk on, worship specifically?

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Tricie – I was lying in bed very scared. I had just come back from the hospital with this diagnosis and I was praying to God. I was asking Him – Lord, if you’re in my corner, please show me.  I fell asleep. That night my whole body was aching; I have a headache, I have a fever and my chest was very congested. Though, I can still breathe, I’m having all these different symptoms. Scared thoughts were racing through my mind of what’s going to happen next. Am I dying? 

God Had me in his Arms

With all the news all over the world that people are dying and losing their lives, I cried out to, God, with my whole being saying “Lord, if you’re with me please show me.” I didn’t know how the answer was going to come, so I go to sleep. That night, I dreamed of being on a balcony and as I’m on this balcony, I saw a man sitting in the corner.

As I held on to the banister, because I felt I was going to fall. I actually fell backwards onto the Balcony and this man caught me. So, when I woke up I knew that, God, heard my prayers and I knew that He had me in his arms.

Is Worship Prayer?

Myrna – But you weren’t really worshiping right? You were just praying to God.

Tricie – I want to go into that. It’s a higher place of, Worship. Most people when they think of the word, Worship, that is maybe lifting your hands or singing a song or maybe just having a moment with the Lord. But I want to challenge everybody to know that, worship, is spilled over into every part of your life. It includes everything we do from the time we wake up to the time we go to Sleep. That’s where the idea for the name “A Higher Place of Worship” came from.

That’s the foundation message of my book. Our, worship,  should spill over into our prayer life. It should go over into maintaining a relationship with, God, outside of the church. During COVID-19, a lot of churches were closed, so how do we, worship? We have to find our place to, worship, wherever we are and that includes our homes.

Worship,  includes reading the Word of God, it includes fasting, and listening to hear the voice of God. Worship, includes so many different areas in life. God, requires us to always have a mindset of, worship, wherever we are.

How to Worship

I have a chapter called a “Permanent Place of Worship”. There’s a section in there that talks about how to stay rooted and grounded in, God, no matter what’s going on around you. This book could be for anybody. It could be for someone just starting out as a Christian believer, it could be for someone who’s been saved for a long time and has been in church for some years, and it’s definitely for the skeptics. I want it to be for the skeptics that may not know if, God, is real so that they can experience the, God, of the Bible – the Supernatural, God, of the Bible.

I have a lot of supernatural  experiences and testimonies in the book, so that people can know that, God, is still a, Supernatural God.

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There are three sections in all.

  1. A particular section is called “Mindful Worship” – how, worship, can spill over into every area of our minds. We should, worship. the Lord with our minds because the scripture says that we should love the Lord our God with all our hearts, with all our souls and with all our minds.
  2. Changing the channel – Mindful of our thoughts and change the channel we’re experiencing negative thoughts. Negative thought patterns can be changed by changing the channel. When we feed on the word of, God, we can actually change the channel.
  3. Renew our minds – God wants all of us to, worship. We’re worshiping him by the renewing of our minds. We are giving Him total control because where the mind goes, the body follows. So the thought originates in your mind, then it becomes an action. God. wants our actions to line up with His word. That’s why we should renew our minds with the word each day.

Use Worship to renew Our Minds

Myrna – That’s one of the reasons I named this podcast ‘Transform Your Mind’ because you know the Bible says be renewed by the transformation of your mind. You can’t do anything or achieve any kind of success whether it’s in a business, in your relationship, even your marriage. I have found that even transforming my mind in my marriage has made my marriage a little better.

Tricie – Anything that you need to do whether it’s worshiping God, using scriptures as your foundation, in your work or whatever, it all starts with your mindset. I want to challenge Christians and non-believers alike to take it a step further to kind of go out of the box to, worship, on a different level that you haven’t. A lot of Christians aren’t experiencing, God, on that level, because they’re not taking the time to do what it is that the Bible says to do. If you read the word of God on a regular basis and you practice it, you can experience, God, on a new level that you haven’t before, even if you’ve been in church for 30 years. 

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Does Worship Give us Access to God?

Myrna – Why do you feel that when we, worship, it opens a path to access God?

Tricie – I believe, worship, gives us access to, God, because that’s the way we communicate with Him. That’s the way we interact with, God, that’s the way to have a relationship with Him.

Anytime you want to be close to someone, you have to make time to talk to them, you have to make time to learn about them, you have to make time to maintain that relationship.

It’s no different with God as it pertains to, worship. We’re supposed to keep that relationship with Him and, worship, Him on the level that we can experience Him. Worship, definitely brings access because, God, loves, worship. He wants us to, worship, Him. He’s our creator and He loves it when we make time for Him. He wants us to actually, worship, and praise Him. To enter His gate with thanksgiving and His courts with praise.

Is Faith different from Worship?

Myrna – What is the difference between, faith, and, worship? One of the things that I’ve learned in my walk with the Lord is that even if you, praise and worship, but you don’t have, faith, then nothing happens because, faith, is the communication language of God. So can you connect the dots for us between, faith and worship?

Tricie – Absolutely, there’s a scripture in Hebrews 11:

says without, faith, it’s impossible to please, God, and that He that comes to, God, must first believe that He is a Rewarder of them that diligently seek Him.

So, faith, is definitely a cornerstone of worshiping, God. If you don’t have, faith, you won’t be able to access any of the promises that He has for you. Faith, is definitely important. Probably I would say the number two thing.

Love is number one. The bible says that these three things,

Faith, Hope and Charity, but the greatest of these is charity.

So our love is definitely first; but, faith, is very important as well as number two.

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A Higher Place of Worship

Myrna – What do you want someone that reads your book; “A Higher Place of Worship” walk away with when they finished the chapters and close the book?

Tricie – I want the listeners or the readers of my book to walk away with

  • A profound sense of getting back to the original blueprint of worship – where it all began without all the lights and the smoke during, praise and worship.
  • Without all the eyes, without everybody watching you, without your pastor actually seeing you raising your hands and when nobody’s there to see you pray when you have the microphone.
  • I want them to know that a real relationship with, Christ Jesus, is possible outside of church.
  • To walk away with knowing how to hear the voice of, God.
  • People to walk away knowing that when you access, God, through, worship, that your life won’t be the same.
  • No matter how long they’ve been with, God, in a relationship that they can have a more profound sense of knowing, because God is all-knowing. When you walk with Him, there are things that He can show you. I believe each day of your life as you live, no matter how old you are living there’s always room to grow in our relationship with, God.
  • Also, I want them to walk away knowing that they have access to God no matter who they are.
  • I want them to walk away knowing that, God, wants them to be stretched with, worship. They can actually get to a place that they never thought they could get. We are supposed to actually have a very intimate relationship with God. It’s not just for pastors or for teachers; it’s for all of us as believers.
  • We all can hear the voice of God. Yes, that’s what I want everyone to walk away with.
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Conclusion A Higher Place of Worship

That’s good and beautiful. The book is available on Amazon Kindle.  I can be reached on Facebook at the remnant page of my ministry page. Also they can reach me at “Tricie Graham” on Facebook as well or either Triciegraham@yahoo.com.

I want to remind you to watch us on YouTube. To subscribe to the channel so that you can watch this program as well as listen to it. If you’re listening on iTunes. I would love you to post a review and to subscribe. I would also like to invite you guys to join my private Facebook group which is called “Life Coach”.

Additional Resources 

https://blog.myhelps.us/does-god-answer-prayer/

How to Communicate with your Guardian Angel

 

Is the Secret to Love, Sex?

How to Find Hardcore Happiness

Is the secret to, Love, Sex? This week on Mindset Transformation Radio Podcast, I interview, Love Coach, James Green. James answers the question “Is, Sex, the most important factor in a relationship?

So, let me ask you. What do you think is the most important factor in a relationship? In my research for this interview. I found this article
on the secret to a long marriage. Hint it was not, Sex!

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Secret to a long Marriage not, sex 

 

But in all seriousness. We have heard the phrase ” A Happy wife a happy life”
Here is another article about a couple married 79 years.

“Just want you to know that you’re still the one I would choose. Still the one I give my heart to, still the one I love.”

So, what’s their secret?

“To support one another, whatever the problems may be, good or bad. Stick together. That’s about it,” Bertha said.

“You know why this lasted 79 years? She has the last word,” Dan added with a smile.

Let me introduce my guest this week:

James is a certified Love and Emotional Intelligence coach. His mission is to teach people how to love themselves as well as love each other. James specialty is Relationship and Personal Development Coaching.

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Show notes Secret to Love 

1. Question 1: Tell us of your journey to become a Love and emotional Intelligence coach. Do you have a personal story that made you specialize in this field?

I was a single parent and realized that when looking for a mate, I had to look for someone who would fit into my lifestyle as a single father. The woman had to accept me and my son as a package deal. That made me look at factors other than, Sex.

As far as my journey to becoming a Love and Emotional intelligence coach, I found I had the aptitude to reach people. People opened up to me. I remember once standing in the line at McDonald’s and this man in line started talking to me telling me his story. I decided to get my certification as a, Life Coach
2. Question 2: How does emotional intelligence fit into the relationship dynamics?
Emotional Intelligence is the ability to hear what your partner is not saying. It is the ability to realize that when your partner says Fine, I am okay with that. for example. She is not fine with that, from her tonality or her body language.
Another facet of emotional intelligence is the ability to keep your cool and not fly off the handle at the slightest provocation.

3. Question 3: What problems do find are the most common and how do you coach your clients to solve them?
I find Trust, Communication and the inability to seek out coaching until after they start experiencing problems.

Couples tend to think that coaching is not needed until there is a huge problem in their relationship and when I hear that I ask them do you also see a doctor AFTER you have Cancer?

4. Question 4: If you had a magic wand to solve common relationship problems, what would you solve?

If I had a magic wand to solve relationship problems, I would solve trust. Lack of trust is one of the most destructive elements in a relationship.

5. Question 5: When you say that relationship is not a 3-letter word, what do you mean?
The topic of our show today “Is the secret to love, Sex?”
Couples would have us believe that great sex keeps the relationship going or strong.
While sex is very important in a relationship it is not the most important factor.
I believe that communication is the most important factor.
Click the podcast link to hear from James directly as he answers this question.

6. Question 6: Why would you say that couples do not proactively seek relationship coaching and wait until there is a problem to get counselling?
Culture, conditioning. Women go to get an annual checkup every year. They get a PAP test to proactively check for any cervical problems. But this same woman would not think of going to a relationship coach to proactively check to see if her relationship is in danger of abnormal growth!

For the men I use the analogy of the oil change because men hate going to the doctor for an annual check up. But they do change their oil every 3 to 5 months. ( I had a laugh at this one. I asked James if he was suggesting men change their wife’s, as often as they change the oil in their cars?)
He assured me he was not saying that but letting the men know that just like the car engine their relationships need regular maintenance.

Tony Robbins also has lots of empowerment advice for couples.
Click the link below to understand how to create better relationships from Tony Robbins


If you found this episode inspirational be sure to subscribe to my podcast and I would also appreciate a rate and review.

You can also follow me on my Facebook page

If you are empowered to become a member of the Human Potential Movement and would like to be a guest on the Mindset Transformation radio show and podcast contact me.

Additional Resources

3 Ways to Find Happiness After a Divorce

 

How to Reprogram your Mind to Stop Binge Eating

Binge eating

When you develop, Binge Eating Disorder, you aren’t able to fight your desire for food. It’s like an addiction. It IS an addiction. Binge eating, and overeating and how that negatively affects your health until you learn how to reprogram your mind.  

My guest today is Dr. Glenn Livingston, author of “Never Binge Again” and our topic is “How to Reprogram Your Mind to stop, binge eating,”

Glenn Livingston PhD,  is a veteran psychologist and was the long-time CEO of a multi-million-dollar consulting firm which serviced several fortune 500 clients in the food industry.  Dr Glenn has sold over 30 million dollars of marketing consulting services over the course of his career.  You may have seen his previous work in major periodicals like the New York Times, the Los Angeles Times, the Chicago sun-times, the Indiana Star Ledger, the New York Daily News, American demographics, or any of other major media outlets.

 Show Notes:

Dr. Glenn can you tell us what makes you uniquely qualified to comment on, binge eating disorder?

Well I’m not just a psychologist who wanted to work with people to help them lose weight;  I’m a guy who had a very serious, binge eating, problem myself.

I know what’s happening in the addiction treatment field that we’re being told that we’re powerless over the, food addiction, that it’s a disease. Binge eating, is 

An irresistible impulse that gets worse over time.

 

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Transform your Mind Stitcher

Here is Dr Glenn’s story on how He conquered, Binge Eating, 

I discovered a weird thing when I was a youth.  I’m 6’4” I’m reasonably muscular and I figured out when I was about 17, that if I worked out for two or three hours a day, I could eat whatever I wanted. So my diet was boxes of muffins, boxes of donuts, boxes of pizza, boxes of chocolate bars. I was eating six, seven, eight thousand calories a day and it was no problem.

 Well as you could figure out, I couldn’t continue, binge eating, like that as I got into my 20’s.

When I got to be about 22 or 23, married and in graduate school, I was commuting to school, I had all these responsibilities as a husband. I could barely work out two hours a week, much less two hours a day.  But I couldn’t get rid of the cravings for, junk food. I had a, food addiction, and  I started getting fatter and fatter.  My triglycerides went through the roof, and I had doctors telling me that I was going to die in my 30’s if I didn’t find stop, binge eating .

 I eventually figured it wasn’t what I was eating, it was what was eating me.  

I had been doing some reading in alternative, food  addiction, treatment by a guy named Jack Trimpey. He wrote a book called “Rational Recovery” and he made it clear to me for the first time that the seed of, food addiction, was really the, reptilian brain,.

 

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Binge Eating, Definition 

Binge eating, is  looking at food from the reptilian brain doesn’t know love.  We’re all we’re all busy trying to love ourselves out of these, food addictions; but the reptilian brain doesn’t know love. The reptilian brain assesses something in the environment and says, do I eat it or do I kill it! There’s no love there, there’s no concern for tribe or family or friends or long-term aspirations or creativity or music or art. There’s none of that.  It’s just eat, mate or kill, and when you look at the animal studies you see that is what happens when you short circuit the pleasure system. 

 You can walk a block in most cities and find a McDonald’s, a Burger King across the street.  There’s a fast-food restaurant on every corner these days. So we don’t have physical electrodes in our brain; but there are chemical electrodes and concentrations of pleasure that we weren’t prepared to meet by evolution.  

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binge eating disorder
binge eating disorder

Binge Eating, and what your choice of foods signifies:

  •  My research found was that people who struggled with, binge eating, chocolate was definitely lonely or brokenhearted.
  •  People who struggled with, binge eating, salty crunchy things, tended to be stressed at work people
  • People who struggled with, binge eating, soft chewy things like bread or bagels or pasta, tended to be stressed at home.

I found out from my mom, the reason I struggled, binge eating, chocolate.

  

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Now on Podbean, Castbox, Deezer, Google Play,  Soundcloud, and Stitcher,

How to reprogram your mind to stop, binge eating.

 I tell people the best way to stop the, food addiction, and, binge eating, is to is to think of the single worst trigger food or eating behavior that’s getting you in trouble.

Maybe it’s eating in the car, maybe that’s where you do all the damage. Maybe you could create one rule that says: I never eat in the car or maybe it’s a particular food. e.g  I can only have salami on Sundays. Maybe it’s about how you eat, maybe it’s more like you need to pause and be more mindful.  e.g I’ll always put my fork down between bites.

If there’s something that you know is getting you into trouble,  binge eating, start with that one.

Binge Eating and the Reptilian Brain 

Don’t worry if making this rule will help you loose weight or not.  Unless your doctor says that it’s really urgent that you do, don’t worry about your weight.  I just want you to get the hang of the way this mental game is played, because that rule allows you to separate your thoughts from your, reptilian brain.

  •  Come up with a name for your, reptilian brain, I called mine my “pig”
  • Some people call theirs their food monster or food demon or something like that.
  • Then you want to listen for those destructive thoughts.  
  • You want to listen for what your inner food demon says is the rationale that you should break the plan with, binge eating, you can do one of two things when you hear it.
  •    You can ignore it, because it doesn’t matter how smart what is saying, it doesn’t matter how logical it sounds, if you know that it’s coming from your food demon, your pig, you now it’s bad.  So you might as well ignore it even if it sounds like it’s got a PhD from Harvard!
  • You could write out what the food demon is saying and you ask yourself where is the lie within it.  Where is the logical fallacy within it.  For example maybe the food demon says one bite won’t hurt you, or  you can start again tomorrow, which is based upon the logical fallacy that you’ll be in the exact same place tomorrow.

 If you reinforce the connection today between that craving and the actual eating of the food then, you’re going to have a stronger craving tomorrow.  That means the, food addiction and, binge eating, will be a little worse tomorrow. 

 One of the ways to attack your craving and, binge eating, is to create a food plan.  The food plan would have some things that you always eat, some things you never eat, and some things you eat sometimes.  

    •  I always eat five servings of fruit or vegetables.  
    • ·         I always drink two whole glasses of water when I get up in the morning.
    • ·        I will only eat pretzels at major league baseball games.
    • ·        I only eat bread when I am out at a restaurant.  
    • ·        I never eat after 6 pm.
  • ·        I never eat pizza.
  • I never eat more than two squares of chocolate a day. 

Conclusion 

While other addictions, such as alcohol and drug abuse, are more widely known and understood, food addiction, and, binge eating,  isn’t. Hope this blog post and Dr. Glenn Livingston, author of “Never Binge Again” helps. 

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How to Fly like an Eagle above the Storms of Life

fly like an eagle

Eagles, love the storm. When clouds gather, the Eagle, get excited. The Eagle, uses the, winds of the  storm,  to lift it higher. We can also learn to, fly like an eagle, above the, storms of life.

Did you suffer from Childhood sexual abuse or sexual harassment as an adult? Today on Mindset Transformation radio and podcast, I share my journey from being sexually abused as a child and how I used the, storms of life,  to, fly like an, eagle in a storm. I teach how you too can use the winds from the, storms of life,  to elevate your life to greater heights.

In this blog, we will study the, Eagle, and how the, Eagle, looks forward to the storm, because the, eagle, knows that only by using the, winds of the storm, can she elevate to greater heights. Eagles in a storm, fly above the storm. Without the, storm, she can never fly above the clouds. Similarly, in life we need challenges, hurts and disappointments to get us out of our comfort zones and teach us to fly like,  eagles in a storm.  Without the, storms of life, we would become complacent.

Introduction 

Here are some characteristics of the, Eagle:

How to, fly like an Eagle, above the, storms of life 

The crow that picks and picks at the ground, can’t rise to the heights of the eagle or is not conditioned to rise about the ground. It’s mindset is to stay on the ground and peck for food.

The, Eagle, does not escape the, storm. It simply uses the, storm, to lift it higher. It rises on the winds that bring the, storm.

When the, storms of life, come upon us — and all of us will experience them — we can rise above them by setting our minds and our belief toward God and fly above the, storms of life,  like an eagle, or we can be like the crow and peck and peck on the ground.

The, storms of life, do not have to overcome us. We can allow power of, Jesus Christ, to lift us above thw, winds of the storm. Jesus Christ,  enables us to ride the,  winds of the storm, that bring sickness, tragedy, failure and disappointment in our lives. We can soar above the, storm.

Eagles, in the, Storm

1. Eagles, fly alone at high altitude and not with sparrows or with other small birds. No other bird can go to the height of the, Eagle. We can, fly like an eagle, where no others go.
2. Eagles, have strong vision. They have the ability to focus on something up to five kilometers away. When an, Eagle, sites his prey, he narrows his focus on it and sets out to get it. No matter the obstacle, the, Eagle, will not move his focus from the prey until he grabs it. We can have vision like an, Eagle, and have focus on our goals.
3. Eagles in the storm, When clouds gather the, Eagle, get excited. The, Eagle, uses the, winds of the  storm,  to lift it higher. Once it finds the, winds of the storm, the Eagle uses the raging, storm, to lift him above the clouds. This gives the, Eagle, an opportunity to glide and rest its wings. In the meantime, all the other birds hide in the leafs and branches of the trees. We can use the, storms of life,  to rise to greater heights. Achievers relish challenges and use them profitably.

Storms, bring destruction

I meditated on the reason for the hurricanes that caused so much destruction to homes and property in the Caribbean islands, Houston, TX and Florida. I believe that God does not make mistakes, that everything in the Universe has a purpose. So, I asked myself what is the purpose of the, storm?

My initial response from the Universe was that, storms, are created with the purpose to blow down the old and make room for the new, because everything is recycled on this earth. But I felt there was more so that is why I decided to study the, Eagle. As mentioned before. The ,Eagle, uses the, storm, to elevate him higher. He can’t fly to great heights without the winds of the storm.

What if God created the, storm, to elevate his people?

The, storm, does not only blow down old trees, it blows down old houses as well, it blows down old power posts and power lines. So, in actuality we should be like the eagle and anxiously await the storm to see what old thing will be renewed.

It works for old relationships as well. There is something immensely intimate about riding out the, storm, with your loved one. Just you and your close family members. All the attention is on each other. No television, no lights just the personal connection and candle light!

I have always loved, storms. I remember the first, storm, that me and my husband rode out together. We were only dating for about 3 months. I loved the rain on the roof, the sounds of the winds rustling the roof, the sight of the palm trees blowing in the winds and being wrapped up in his arms. I think we came out of that experience closer than we went in. That is a time to really talk and share! Get to know each other.

The other thing the, storm, to the Caribbean Islands brings is new things to replace the old. If you had an old roof and the wind blew if off, guess what FEMA will give you a new one. If your pool screens were old and the wind just ripped them apart more then guess what you get new screens at no cost to you. If your old car was on its last leg, then you could park it under a tree and pray the tree falls on it! You get my point.

How you experience anything depends on how you interpret it. Change your mindset that the, storm, comes to take from you and replace it with the winds of the storm brings change. Changing out the old for the new.

Keep your eyes on, Jesus Christ, in the, storm, and you will not sink

But I still think there is more!
The bible teaches us to keep our eyes on, Jesus Christ, when we are in the, storm.
There was a time when Jesus had sent his disciples to go on before him while he stayed in the mountain to pray (Matthew 14:23).
While they were in the boat there came a, storm, “and the boat was already a considerable distance from land, buffeted by the waves because the wind was against it.”- Matthew 14:24

Seeing the distress his disciples were in, Jesus Christ, went to them, walking on water. When Peter saw, Jesus Cjrist, he asked him to allow him to come to him, by walking on the water. Peter started to walk on with his faith however, when Peter reached at a certain distance he got distracted, and when he got distracted by the boisterous wind he became afraid and started to sink.

“But when [Peter] saw the wind, he was afraid and, beginning to sink, cried out, ‘Lord, save me!’” (Matthew 14:30 NIV)

Many of us are like Peter, we started our journey with the Lord and even though the, storms of life, come our, faith, allows us to overcome these trials, you could say to ‘walk on water’. But along the way we get distracted especially when we think the situation has gone on for too long, or we come upon big, storm. I am using the, storm, here as a metaphor for trouble. It was easy to trust God when our trials were little; but what happens when the situations seem bigger than we are able to handle? What happens when we have a category 4 storm? Do we let fear in? Or do we anticipate it with the mindset that it will elevate us to new heights?

Focusing on what’s happening around us will cause us to be afraid; afraid of losing our family, losing our jobs, our homes, or being broke and not having enough to take care of our needs. We start worrying about what is going to happen next and very soon we start to sink.

The,  storm, also bring with it floods. The water could be more dangerous than the winds.
With Irma, I was going to ride out the, storm, in my home because my house is built to withstand the winds; but as soon as they started talking about 10-15 ft. storm surges. I called my husband and said we are leaving now! I was afraid of my car being under water and I pictured me on the roof waiting to be rescued. So, I understand fear!

Joel Osteen had a message about flood waters he used the analogy of your water breaking during childbirth. That flood there signals new birth as is regarded with excitement. He also reminded us that we never know when that flood is going come. His wife Victoria water broke when she was in an elevator going somewhere that was not the hospital! It is all about perception. Ask yourself what is the good that can come out of the house and car being flooded? You get new ones of course ! Usually the insurance pays!

Here are five things God wants you to do if you feel like you’re sinking in a, storm.

1. Keep your eyes on, Jesus Christ, and stay focus.
The moment you take your eyes off the Lord, you will go under. When you focus on the wind and the waves — your circumstances — you’re going to sink, just like Peter. There will be many things happening in the world to get you distracted. Economies going under, crime and violence on the rise, people losing their jobs, accidents on the rise and so forth. These things will get you distress. Jesus Christ,  tells us that when we see these things happening, that is not the time to get sidetracked, but it is the time to look up (Luke 21:28.)

2. Do not be fearful, Jesus is with you in the, storm.
When you’re in a, storm, it is very easy to become fearful, fearful that you will not get rid of a sickness, fearful that your marriage will end, fearful that your child will die, fearful that you will not be able to pay off your debts or bills and still have enough money to survive. But when fear comes, and it will come, take authority over it and stand on the promises of God that he will always be with you. Fear comes with torment and that’s why Jesus gives us peace (John 14:27). Peace that will help you to ride out your storms.

3. Don’t let go of, faith.
Faith, is like our heavenly currency that we use to draw what we need from the spiritual realm. When you maintain your faith you will receive strength to weather the, storms of life.

4. Don’t doubt.
You don’t need great, faith, to make it through the, storms of life. You just need faith in the right person, that is, Jesus Christ. Peter started to sink when he started to doubt.

Maybe you could benefit from a Training Kit that teaches you how to Maximize your achievement and Fly above the storms. Click below to order The Maximum Achievement Training Kit from best selling author Brian Tracy.

 

5. Praise God.
Praise is a weapon, a very powerful one. It confuses the enemy as he cannot understand how you able facing your storms but will have a praise. When Jehoshaphat was facing a large army, he did not use swords to fight his battle, he just praised God and his enemies were totally destroyed. Even in the storm, even when you feel like you’re sinking, even when you’re scared to death — praise him all the time.

Additional Resources

Life Leadership & Success

https://blog.myhelps.us/principle-2-the-events-in-your-life-whether-good-or-bad-work-together-for-good/

 

 

Life Coaching part 1: Who am I

In order to make permanent changes in your life, the first question you must ask is, who am I?  This question allows you to understand yourself and why you came into this body.

As a, Life coach, I want to share with you a , life coaching session, Life Coaching Part 1: Who am I,  from my 6-week Life coaching workshop.

We can never become who we were meant to be unless we can first recognize who we are by asking the question, who am I.

To know thyself is to grow thyself

So let’s dive right in.

First a little about, who I am.

I am a certified, Life coach, specializing in Mindset and consciousness. In 2012 I wrote my first book “Becoming conscious, my awakening” because I started to understand, who I am. In this episode I will take you through the process of discovering Who you are, be asking the question, who am I.

If you like this content please share with your friends and remember to rate, review and subscribe to the podcast. Thank you

Life coach Myrna Young, who am I
Life coach Myrna Young, who am I

Who am I, What are my deepest and truest values?

Your deepest values are the ones no one can move you off of. Your deepest values are the ones that if not met, hurt the most. Your truest values are the ones that make you cry.

Your deepest value could be that you would never hit your child. You were abused as a child and you vowed never to hit your child; but you get married and your spouse believes in spanking. He or she believes the bible that says spare the rod and spoil the child. So, your spouse spanks your child. It hurts you so much that you are forced to file for a divorce. Irreconcilable Differences!

Another example to find out, who am I, could be that you were brought up that nice girls do not have sex before marriage. It is a deal breaker in all your relationships. Your dates either leave you or they cheat on you; but you can’t bring yourself to have premarital sex. It is one of your deepest and truest values. As a result, you are single and unmarried at 40 years old.

Your deepest values are found by asking the question, who am I. It could be about how you feel about charity. I never pass someone on the street begging. I feel it is a blessing to have a dollar to give. My husband on the other hand, feels that everybody can find a job, and only the worthless people stand at the corner and beg. That is his deepest value and this is mine.

Your deepest value could take the form of image and by asking, who am I. You may be willing to endure a passionless marriage if it gives you status in your community. There are lots of big houses with white picket fences that house very unhappy families.

One of my deepest values was on domestic abuse. My ex-husband slapped me and I divorced him. Simple as that! My value took the form that I would never become a battered woman. I didn’t have to ask the question, who am I.  I knew that if he hit me once he would hit me again. My daughter was 5 years old at the time. Most women would have a value in giving their children a family with a mom and dad. But mine was more self-centered. Nobody should judge your deepest values. They are yours. You must know them and accept them. They make you who you are. A unique being!

Who am I, do I believe in One True Love?

Your truest value could be found by also asking, who am I. How do you love and receive love?
Do you believe that you could only love one person and there is only one true love for you? What happens if you get a divorce or your spouse dies? Does that mean that love is over for you?
How do you receive love?

I heard a story once about a woman who would ask her husband every day if he loved her. He would say of course I love you honey. Yet she did not believe him and would ask him again the next day. She felt love by how much attention she received from her husband. As her insecurities grew she required more and more attention. The marriage ended in divorce.

Your deepest value could be on why you feel you are on this earth, in this body. Do you take the time to consider your purpose and your legacy?

Who am I, What are my preferences and priorities?

Who am I, What kind of house would I like to live in.
What country would I like to live in if I had a choice. Do I prefer beach front, mountain view or lots of trees and greenery? Visualize yourself sitting on the porch of this house.

Who am I, how do I like my men? Do I like them tall, dark and handsome? or am I looking for the spiritual connection and don’t care what form the package takes?

What kinds of music do I like? What kinds of music transports me to a good place?

What are my preferences during sex? Do I like it with the lights on or off?

What forms of entertainment do I prefer? Do I like the movies, going dancing or staying at home with a good book?

If I didn’t have to work, what would I do?

Who are my priorities in Life? Do my children come first, my spouse or God?
Do I make healthy eating and exercise a priority or do I never have time to get to it?

Who am I, What genuinely makes me happy?

I love walking in the park and listening to podcasts and books about successful people in life.

I love listening to the rain and the sounds of the ocean.

Ask yourself , who am I, and put your list of preferences on paper.

Soundcloud Transform your mind podcast
Transform your Mind Soundcloud podcast

Who am I, What are my subconscious patterns and ways of reacting?

How do I react when I feel rejected?

  • Do I seek revenge?
  • Do I get even or do I eat a pint of ice-cream?
    How do I look at the world?
  • Do I see abundance or do I see scarcity?
  • Do you feel jealous when your friends get a promotion or find love?
  • Are you glad for them or do you secretly hope they fail? No judgment just understanding.

 

Who am I, If you are happy for your friends, you are attracting abundance into your life. If you are jealous, you are saying that there is not enough to go around and you feel they have taken your share. So, you have a spirit of lack and that will not bring you abundance.

Who am I, What are your triggers?

Ask yourself? When do I pick up the phone and call my old lovers?
Is my trigger when I can’t get my lover on the phone and I think he or she is cheating on me?

I am one of those people who don’t bear malice. That means that I get angry for a few days and then I forgive. Unless it is the third time. I have a 3-strike rule!

Transform Your Mind iHeart Radio
iHeart Radio

Who am I, What do you Fear

As a Life coach, I ask my clients, what do they fear?  

This is an important workshop. Fears are bottom feeders. Fears keep you at the tail and not the head of the table. If you have fears, you must face them and replace them.
Fear can also keep you bound in a bad or abusive relationship.

Here are some common fears:

  • Do you fear getting old?
  • Do you fear being alone?
  • Do you fear being homeless?
  • Do you fear getting fat?
  • Do you fear your spouse would leave you?
  • Do you fear losing your job?
  • Do you fear death?

Fear is an energy. Thoughts are the most powerful energy force in the universe.
Thoughts can be either positive or negative.
Heading up the rear of negative thoughts is fear.
It is the bottom feeder or all the emotions.
When you live in fear, you feel bad all the time.
If you allow fear to linger in your body and in your mind. It will not only attract the thing you fear the most into your experience; but it will also bring disease to your body.
All diseases can be traced back to negative thoughts and emotions.
Negative thoughts transform your body into an acidic state.
In fear mode your body is activated in the fight or flight mode.
Your body tenses, your breathing is shallow, your heart palpitates, your blood pressure is elevated, your hands and body sweat.
Not a good place to dwell.

https://blog.myhelps.us/how-to-overcome-fear-and-find-joy-part-1-the-energy-of-fear/

Today I want to teach you how to use positive energy to clear the negative energies of fear. But first I want to touch on one of the spiritual laws of the universe. i.e The Law of Sowing and Reaping.
We all know of the physical laws like gravity.
Some laws are physical and some are spiritual and quantum.
Understanding the Law of Sowing and Reaping can change your world.
Understanding that whatever you create it in the spiritual world will manifest in the physical world.
Put another way means that whatever you plant in your mind you will manifest in your physical world.

Just like planting an apple tree.
In the spiritual world,
The soil is your mind.
The seeds are your thoughts.
The water are your actions.
And the sun is your feelings.

If you allow fear to dwell in your heart and mind every day you will manifest an apple orchard in your reality.

Energy flows where attention goes.

Whatever you focus on expands.
Everything is energy and all energy attracts similar energy.
You can’t put out negative energy and expect positive results.
You can’t plant apple trees and expect oranges.
Likewise, you can’t focus on what you fear and produce a successful result.
If you are constantly thinking of the things you fear, you are planting a seed and based in the universal law of reaping and sowing it must germinate.
The mind or consciousness is connected to reality.
Think of something strong enough or long enough to and it will eventually manifest in your reality.

These are six words you must stamp on your mind.

“You become what you think about”

When you realize that your mind is a garden you will begin to plant only the things you desire.
So, write down something that is opposite of what you fear and start giving it the same attention you have been giving your fear.
Since light conquers darkness it will eventually have your fear for lunch!

This means whatever you fear you will attract. So, if you fear being alone that is what you will be, alone. If you fear your spouse will leave you, be prepared for that reality. It is very very important to replace your fears with your desires.

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TuneIn Radio

Conclusion Life coaching session, Who am I

As we wrap up this episode, let’s recap
Ask yourself these questions:
Who am I?
What are my deepest values. What do I care about the most?
What are my preferences and priorities?
Who and what is important to me?
What makes me happy. What images make me cry?
How do I react to things or people who hurt me?
What do I fear the most?

As a certified Mindset Coach, I have designed a 6 Part Coaching program that starts off by bringing clarity to Who You Are because that is how you show up in your personal interactions.

Additional Resources 

Ask Coach Myrna: How to Start Over?

 

How to Find your Soul Mate or Twin Flame

soulmate vs twin flame

Are you a single woman hoping to, find your soul mate?  What about your, twin flame, who is your mirror, soul. Science says that when you meet your  Life partner, some thing magical happens. In this blog we look at what happens when two, souls, with constructive energies meet?

Listen to the full interview here:

In our last episode my co-host and I looked at what, single women, need to do to get their house ready for love, where to look for love and what to look for when you are starting over after divorce or death of a partner.

If you missed that episode you can download it here: https://blog.myhelps.us/how-single-women-find-love/ or on iTunes ,iHeart radio or wherever you get your podcasts. 

Transform Your Mind iHeart Radio
iHeart Radio

Today’s episode of the Transform your Mind Radio Hour is sponsored by  Columbus Financial Coach.  Are you in a deep hole of “Financial Depression” with nowhere to turn for help? Constantly being harassed by collection agencies? Then visit Columbus Financial and success coach. www.columbusfinancialcoach.com

Introduction

 How to, Find your Soul mate,  the Science of Attraction

In the last Blog post, I shared how I met my husband on a train. I am going to use this personal story to illustrate what happens when two strangers or, souls, meet for the first time.

As you may remember from Chemistry class, every atom and molecule gives out and absorbs light. The human body is made up of 50 trillion cells composed of atoms and molecules. So we are massive bundles of energy giving off and absorbing light or energy all the time.

When two energies come together they become entangled, the first step to, find your soul mate, is constructive energy.

When two energies are in harmony, the result is called, constructive energy, because it increases in size.  That is why you should grow as a person when you are in the right relationship.

We call this, “good vibes” very important when you are hoping to, find your soul mate. 

How Chemistry plays in finding your Soul Mate

So let’s look at what happened when I met my husband and our energies became constructive!

I walked onto a train and he was standing by the door. I looked fine, mini skirt, sunglasses, designer bag over my shoulder,  so I caught his attention. He caught my attention because he was the first black officer I had seen on the train.

On be known to me my second Chakra or energy center in charge of communication sent him a signal because he tells me he felt this warm feeling in his body. He had never felt that before. Let me put a pin here and explain.

Our bodies are made up of seven energy centers, called Chakras. Each of these energy centers are responsible for certain functions.  I know that my second Chakra located below my navel is my communication center and it is responsible for engaging a mate by sending out signals when it finds a compatible energy so you can, find your soul mate.

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Soul mate vs Twin flame

My husband could also be my, twin flame.  After 14 years of marriage, I do believe we are mirror souls. What Is A Twin Flame? Sometimes discussed in terms of a “mirror soul” or, soul connection, a, twin flame, is the other half of your, soul. It is theorized that a, soul, can split into two after ascending to a high frequency. Thereafter, the, soul, lands in two different bodies.

I must have also received something from my husband’s energy center as well because my thoughts lingered on him. I was curious. That was all that it was for me at that time. Curiosity. I was not actively looking to, find a  soul mate.

But I have heard men say that the first time they saw their wife they knew that she was the one. There is such  a thing as love at first sight! Have you heard Steve Harvey tell his story of when he met his wife and, how he found his, soul mate?.  I don’t think he was actively trying to, find your soul mate. But there she was. He was doing stand up comedy and she walked in late with her girlfriends, and he couldn’t stop staring at her.  In fact he couldn’t even continue his act.  He told her right then that she was going to be his wife! Believe in compatible energy, it is real.

Anyway, back to my story. Because our energies entangled and we both got, good vibes, we looked to further the communication.

The, Soul mate Connection, is Immediate

Another pin. That is why we shouldn’t chase men.  if you guys have, constructive energy, or, good vibes, they will reach out. We are hard wired to mate. It is all happening without our conscious thought. Your soul is looking for it’s, twin flame.

So my husband searched for me on the train every day until he found me. I noticed him sit behind me for a few mins while he got up the nerve to come talk to me. We talked for about 30 mins until I got off the train at my stop. I will confess that I was not impressed by the conversation. He cursed like a sailor. I think that men who curse in front of women have no respect; but when I got off the train my energy body told me that it had made a, soul connection.

I had this incredible feeling of euphoria!  My stomach was doing somersaults. I knew right then that we would have a relationship. I knew right then that I had found my, soul mate, This is how you, find your soulmate, you listen to your body.

Three months later he proposed we were married 8 months after. That was 13 years ago and we are still in love, compatible energies!

Soul mate Meaning

This is an example of the science of two, compatible energies, something we have no control over.  That is why you have heard people say we have no control over who we love. You can’t pick your, soul mate. The science of attraction brings him or her to you.

Your, soul mate meaning,  two souls joining together to perfect each other.

On the other hand when your energy is not in sync with other, we get, bad vibes, not your, soul mate.  The energy cancels each other out and instead of feeling euphoria you feel depleted.

Energy is your most important reading as a single woman looking for a mate. Ever heard the saying that someone is like an anchor, you can’t thrive since you met them.  Pay attention that means that you are not expanding, you are contracting or stuck.

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Illustration  the Science of, Attraction, the bad vibe

Rhonda met this great guy at a bar. The guy was gorgeous, absolutely delicious. He pursued and seduced her and they started, dating. They had a great time together but something didn’t click. He was kinda, sorta vague on his explanation about everything.

It took about three months of, dating, this guy for Rhonda to discover that he was still living with his daughter’s mother and another 6 months to understand that theirs was an on and off relationship. He would never under any circumstances spend the night, saying that he did not want his daughter to wake up and he was not there.  This reminds me of Whitney Houston’s married relationship in Waiting to Exhale!

This is when Rhonda realized that a married man is a married man.  They can string you along forever. They can tell you anything.  She decided to breakup.  The breakup was mutual but she wasted at least 2 years on a relationship that was going nowhere when if she had paid attention to her, bad vibes,  she could have saved herself from heartache.

Reading energy is the most important data in the, dating, world.

Be careful of Psychopaths while looking to, find your  Soul Mate

Have you ever met a psychopath? Or been in a relationship with one? They are masters at reading energy.

We are all broadcasting a frequency of our most innermost thoughts. That is how a predator picks out his prey.

  • That is how a mugger chooses his victim.
  • Animals also know how to read this energy.  A lion picks his prey from a flock. He reads the vibration of the weakest prey.

I am sure everyone on the planet is aware on some level of the Art Kelly crimes against teenage girls and women. How do you think he chose his victims?  Women who would allow him to disrespect their bodies and lock them up in a room and  have to ask to go to the bathroom and ask to eat?  Some said that he didn’t feed them for 3 days, yet they didn’t leave. As one of his victims said in an interview.  If you were weak minded, he wants you. You could be a teenager or a 30 year old woman!

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Science of, attraction,  reading vibrations when looking to, find your soul mate?

Synergistic relationships are based on both individuals being on the same wavelength, when they completely understand each other and don’t try to limit the space they occupy in each other’s lives.

I read an article that stated the whole is greater than the sum of its parts.  The examples used was if you train two Belgian horses together, the effect is multiplied: together, they can pull 32,000 pounds. Two horses, doing the work of four, even though it seems to defy physics. Often, in a positive relationship, you’ll find that synergy is already happening.

How can you increase that by finding harmony, in acknowledging individual strengths and how they work best together?  For example, I love to shop; but I don’t necessarily like to cook all the time.  My husband, will send me a list of all the items to pick up the grocery store and he will cook.  I then just have to do keep the kitchen tidy and get the family read to enjoy his great cooking.  It works for both of us.

In regards to signs women should look out for in predators, Robert Hare, one of the world’s foremost experts on, psychopathic behavior, believes that people need to know what to do in the event they find themselves involved or associated with a predatory psychopath.

Here are his tips on How to Avoid being targeted by a predator when trying to, find your soulmate:

  1. Be careful of props—the winning smile, the promises, the fast talk, and the gifts meant to deflect you from the manipulation and exploitation that may be occurring. Any of these characteristics can have enormous sleight-of-hand value, serving to distract you.”
  2. Anyone who seems too perfect is. Psychopaths hide their dark sides until they get their target person deeply involved. Too much flattery, feigned kindness, and cracks in grandiose stories should provide clues and put you on your guard. Make reasonable inquiries.
  3. Know yourself—or you might be vulnerable from your blind spots. Predators know how to find and use your triggers, so the more you realize what you tend to fall for, the more closely you can guard against it.

 

The second stage in the Science of Attraction, is Chemistry

I know you have heard this word thrown around all the time. For example the dating sites match people up by common interests; but they can’t manufacture chemistry.

Let’s get back to my husband for a minute.

I just shared all about the our first meeting and about us having good vibes but if we had no chemistry we would just become good friends.

Here are the Chemicals released  by love that is responsible for Chemistry:

  • Dopamine – Lights up your pleasure center. Your pleasure goes up when you are near or think about this person. Your  motivation goes up, Now you are thinking of that nice house and 2 kids! Your sadness goes down, if you were depressed, you are now happy.

I know you have heard the saying love is blind. It is true. Dopamine make you more attractive to your mate and since we are on this planet to procreate, your sexuality goes up! I am sure you have heard or have personal data that new lovers do it all the time!

  • The second chemical that is released in love is Oxytocin  – Oxytocin is responsible for trust. Your level of trust goes up, and your attachment goes up. This is probably why your girlfriends can’t figure why you are going out with a player;  but you don’t see it until your heart is crushed. The psychopath uses this one to his advantage.
  • Finally Serotonin is released. – This hormone is responsible for all the pain attached to love. Serotonin goes up and you become obsessed with your lover. Love is a chemical addiction!

Thank God I have only had one experience with an over abundance of this hormone.

I met one of my boyfriends at a club and it was an instant attraction. I fell hard.  I swooned when he called me baby the next day!

Less than 2 months after we met, we made plans to spend the New Year in Jamaica.  He left before Christmas but I wouldn’t leave my kids for Christmas so I made plans to meet him in Jamaica after Christmas.   It was the longest week in my entire life.  I literally looked at the clock the entire time.  I was an addict! I however did not, find my soulmate.

Arifah what can you lend to this conversation from a social worker perspective?

Wow, Myrna glad you spoke about the hormones.  I always talk to my clients about increasing their Oxytocin through touch, such as a hug, holding hands, a kiss.  Everyone has a sensitive area on the body that causes arousal when touched, whether sexual or just to feel good. It’s important in a relationship to know what your partner likes and does not, to give each other compliments and share tips on how increase synergy between each other.  It’s important to always reminisce on moments, like when you first met, knew you were in love and what you admire about one another now.  All of this, helps build connection.

In general the most salient characteristics for chemistry between two people are mutual interest (reciprocal candor, reasonableness, intimacy,

Similarity, and physical attraction.

 

Here are some questions from my Life Coach group on Facebook on How to, Find your Soul mate?

Remember you have an open invitation to join this group to get answers from the group on any of your struggles in life.

Question from Velma: I would like to, find your soul mate, but most men in my age group 60, want a traditional woman to cook and clean and a man to think for her. I’m not a traditional woman and I’m tired of pretending to be helpless. How do we as women maneuver in a world of the insecure man?

My answer – be both cake and ice-cream. Sometimes you are soft like ice cream and sometimes you are in charge and embrace your masculine energy and be cake.

What’s your answer Arifah

Keep doing what you love and make yourself a priority to level up.

Question from Elizabeth:

Should I be looking to, find your soul mate,  of just someone to keep me warm at night?

When you are in your fifties and you have to start all over dating, do you date to find a husband or should you be okay with someone to keep you warm at night.

My answer- Someone to keep you warm at night. Women over 40 have a very slim chance of finding a husband, but you can definitely, find your soul mate!

What’s your answer Arifah?

Its up to you, based on what you are looking for in the present.  Dating, can work either way, based on what you end up wanting.

Arifah is the Founder and Program Director of Lifted by Purpose.

Lifted by Purpose Provides a diverse range of services to organizations seeking trainings, workshops or programs with the intent to engage youth in conversations about mental health and learn practical strategies to cope with life stressors. Including:

  • Anger Management
  • Healthy Relationships
  • Mental Health Education and Coping Skills
  • Youth Engagement and
  • Mental Health First Aid Training

Located at 180 Shaw St, suite 201, Toronto, Ont.  Phone # 416-391-5270

 Additional Resources for, How to Find your Soulmate

https://blog.myhelps.us/sex-and-spiritual-energy-the-tree-of-life/

 

Is the Secret to Love, Sex?

The Alchemy of Desire

How To Use Vibrational Energy For Attraction

https://sitn.hms.harvard.edu/flash/2017/love-actually-science-behind-lust-attraction-companionship/

 

 

 

How to Live with Intention During the Tension

intention in the tension

We all know that there’s a lot of, tension, right now in the world. We can’t even just say America because this is a global pandemic. There’s a lot of uncertainty so living with, intention, relieves stress.

A few weeks ago I was looking at these large groups and wondering  If I would  ever again  be comfortable at a concert or a parade with thousands of people? Will our consciousness around this, tension, be changed forever?

Listen to the full interview 

Introduction Intentional living in the Tension

So how do we traverse this, tension, with, intention? We shouldn’t always just react, we should have some, intention.

Meanwhile, one of the things I also want to mention is, intentional living.  Some people are have the, intention, to live intentionally. The people who practice, intentional living,  are called, minimalists. What, minimalists, do for intentional living is they intentionally live with few possessions. They do that because, intentional living, with only the items that support your purpose, is one of the ways to live with, intention.  So, minimalists, are saying  “we don’t need all this stuff, we’re getting rid of all this junk and we’re going to practice, intentional living.

Minimalists, made me remember or think about the tiny homes movement.

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Transform your Mind Spotify Podcast
Download on Spotify

Thane Marcus Ringler on Intention in the Tension

Thane Marcus Ringler, is a former professional golfer turned speaker, writer and development coach living in Denver Colorado with his wife, Evan.  Thane’s mission is to help others live and work better. He’s passionate about speaking to the journey from the journey and is striving to empower this generation to take ownership of their lives and never settle for less than they’re capable of.

Thane is the host of the “Up and Comers” show – a podcast all about the process of becoming and, intentional living, while sharing stories from other inspiring Up and Comers. Find out more about Thane and his work on, intention, in the, tension, by visiting him on the web.

Alright, I’m going to digress a little bit from the normal start to my interviews, because, I love your podcast the Up and Comers show because I love stories. Stories are a good way to teach as you said; you do stories on, living intentionally.  Do you follow the format of the American life podcast?  They perfected storytelling and became the first popular podcast.

Thane – Thanks for asking. It’s been a really fun journey of about four years now. Obviously when you do something for that length of time, it changes a lot as you do it. It kind of shifts and iterates into different forms; but ultimately it was mirrored off of similar shows like the Tim Ferriss show or even the Joe Rogan experience. In that, they’re long-form interviews that are more of a dance than a system, with the length of time being on average with interviews around 90 minutes.

It allows someone’s story to really be told. People that are, living intentionally, like you said earlier, in this, tension, because I think that is the big difference between, intentional living, and maybe normal living.

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TuneIn Radio

What is Intentional Living?

Myrna – Yes, I love hearing how we can do, intentional living. Whether it’s intentional for personal growth which is basically my, intention, learning something every day and not to be reactive, living intentionally.

Thane – Everyone does have a story to tell and I think those are really fun to hear from other people mine. I grew up in Kansas, the  Central heartland of America and ended up going to California for college, spent about 10 years out there in LA. Vastly different cultures just socially and interacted with a lot of different peoples within that timeframe. I did play golf.

My whole life I was an athlete and competitor; I ended up getting to play about four years professionally, that was a really neat journey. I felt very blessed to have that opportunity in the second half of my career when I faced that injury that repeated about five times over a year and a half that sidelined me for a lot of it. That was very frustrating; but also diversified my interests.

During that time, I started the podcast with a buddy of mine. Thereafter, I started on my journey of writing the book that you talked about last time. From Here to There was my first book and that was really about the experience of playing golf. My whole life in a high level taught me about how to pursue excellence in any field and then from that I kind of went on building a speaking career and pursuing more opportunities as a speaker.

That was a really neat adventure. This coaching practice has kind of been the main focus outside of professional golf for the last three years, working with individuals on personal and professional development.

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Transform Your Mind iHeart Radio
iHeart Radio

Using the power of intention to get unstuck in life

A lot of times that involves three types of people:

  • People who are stuck and want to get unstuck.
  • Some who are transitioning or starting something on the side and want help with finding the right path to follow or even the feedback that they need to hear on how they can develop to set themselves up for success.
  • Then, finally people who want to level up in their work or in their lives and need some extra accountability and objectivity to do that.

Life Coaching part 1: Who am I

That’s been a really fulfilling process for me, I help people live with, intention. Playing golf I was more focused on myself and not other people.  Most recently, this year I got married at the start of COVID and moved to Denver where my wife and I now live, and that’s been a really sweet transition even though so much change is going on in our world. We’ve definitely experienced a lot of that even personally.

This fall, I’m really excited. In November, the two online courses I’ve been building are going to be finally released and that’s been the next chapter that I’m really excited about.

Myrna – So, how does the, power of intention, help when you’re stuck, afraid alone like many of us during this pandemic?

One of the areas that you mentioned that you coach is helping people who are in the stuck place in life.  I would probably think that most of the people that are coming into the life coaching conversation is stuck somewhere, right?

Well as humans, we all are to some extent constantly either stuck in a circular movement. Usually that means digressing or decaying in some way where we’re growing, we’re moving forward and there’s really in between there’s no sitting on the fence in the middle of those two sides, at least not for very long. I like to think, as humans, I think our natural default if we don’t make a choice is to go down the path of least resistance and not live with, intention.

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Intentional living is going with the flow

So, if we don’t choose, living intentionally,  we’re going to be going downhill. Our brains are designed that way. In order to go upstream or the path of most resistance, we have to have effort and, intention, which is ultimately discipline. Discipline is effort, and, intention, is saying  “I’m going to choose to go upstream and I’m going to put forth the effort to do so by rowing or whatever the illustration”.

I struggled with this idea that in practicing, there’s a practice and performance mentality. I think this would be helpful for what we’re talking about. Here, the practice mentality is saying “I’m going to hold myself to a higher standard with, intention.” I think I can achieve, intention, because of practice. It’s okay to fail in practice because, there are no consequences; but I’m going to try to reach a level that I didn’t even think I can reach”.

That’s good training for, intentional living. When we come to a performance, if we maintain that mindset and we keep failing to reach that super high level we start beating ourselves up – like “Oh! You suck, you aren’t good enough, you’re never going to get there, and you’re never going to perform.

Thane – What we are speaking about is self-awareness. A lot of times, having a self-awareness to know what we need ourselves – means we need to understand ourselves. I think the three primary tools of self-awareness are journaling and reflecting which is just sitting with a pen and paper. Now looking back on a situation or a day or a moment or our lives and understanding it more clearly. That’s feedback, you’re thinking about having a person in your life whether it be a coach, mentor, family member, a close friend or confidant who can help you see more objectively; because we are inherently subjective.

Then there is meditation, just being able to sit in the present moment and remove the distractions that cloud our vision and by using those three primary tools. We get way better at seeing ourselves clearly, so that we can steer ourselves better and live with, intention.

Myrna – Self-awareness and meditation, that’s awesome.

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Transform your Mind Stitcher
Transform your Mind Stitcher

Intention in the Tension

What does it mean to live with, intention in the, tension?

Myrna – When I researched, intentions, what came up was Justin Bieber’s song –intentions, he’s talking about shower you with my, attention. These are my only, intentions. So, let’s dive in and talk about these, intentions, in the, tension.

Thane – The, intention, is really the reason behind what we do. So, intentional living, is just infusing a why,  a reason or purpose into our daily lives, our daily thoughts or daily actions. Again, it doesn’t happen by chance. We don’t default into this, we have to choose it and so a lot of it really revolves around purpose and identity. In the whole phrase, intention, in the, tension, my co-founder of the podcast; Adam Setzer came up with that term.

I think it’s just a catchy phrase to show that in life we face, tensions, we all know this very well right now in the COVID 19 pandemic. There are people that are on the one side of the, tension, (always wear masks). And there are people saying, “no don’t ever wear masks.”  Everyone’s at a different place, some are following President Trump saying this pandemic is nothing and it would go away and some people are so fearful, they stay home, because there’s a lot of, tension.

So, those are just two myriads are the more permanent or pressing right now; but every single day we have, tension, that we face even from exercise.

Tension during the COVID 19 Pandemic

Try getting married during COVID, like I did. You have, tension, as a  newly married couple during COVID 19. The point of, tensions, isn’t to pick a side and then just rest on that side. A lot of times with, the power of intention, the best place to be is in the middle, in the gray, in the messy, tension. By choosing a side, we eliminate the, tension, but really that isn’t the best place to be.

The best place is to be in the middle. When we’re living in the, tension, we have to infuse, intention, and a purpose or reason. Why? So that we can be able to see both sides with some fairness, with some objectivity without camping out and saying okay I’ve already made my mind. I already know everything and I’ve already arrived. That is never true for any of us in life, so a lot of it revolves around recognizing that there are, tensions, and then understanding our purpose and our identity.

Myrna – There’s a lot going on right now. Everybody is talking about how divorce rates has just shot up, because people are forced to be together with, tension. There’s a lot of, tension, because there’s no outlets; but I like what you said, I’m a Christian and I was just finished reading this really fabulous book, Think like a Monk by Jay Shetty and one of the things I learned from that book is that we don’t always get back the love from the people we give it to.

Jay Shetty shared a story when he was in this monk. He’s complained to the senior monk that he was giving all this out this service and love and he was not getting anything back. Then, the senior monk told him that a lot of times when you give out love, you don’t get it back from the same people but the universe always send it back.

So, we are giving out love to let’s say a spouse or children or something and we’re expecting it back; but love like Jesus said love your enemy as your friend. You should know that the foundation of the Bible is ALL LOVE. It’s not necessary that you’re going to love somebody that loves you. If you love your enemy, then obviously they don’t love you back.

So, if you have the, intention,  that you’re going to love unconditionally and maybe it’s will boomerang back to you, even if it’s not from this person; but you’re going to get it back somehow. That actually makes it easier.

Hope and the Power of Intention

Myrna – What do you think helps us live full of hope and live with, intention, in 2020?

Thane – HOPE, as you earlier mentioned is I believe, readily available for anyone at any time. I think hope is the fuel that comes from just reframing our perspective on things. When your perspective is simply your view of a situation, an object or yourself and guess what that can be viewed from many different places, hope in 2020 as you rightly said is something that more and more people are feeling hopeless.

I think it starts just by reframing our perspective. My book “Catalyst for Hope”. It’s really just talking about four catalysts or four simple perspectives that I’ve found to unlock a lot of hope in my life.

We can always do this and it’s very simple. The fact that we are all in process that has not finished yet, is not over. We get to keep going forward and we get to keep moving. We still have a choice and a chance to live, breathe and do work in this world. Be a part of the change we wish to see.

In conclusion

Myrna – Tell us about your online courses, you told me you have two of them. One is “Growing Self-awareness” and we have talked about that, which is great. Another word for Self-awareness is “Consciousness”.

I thought I heard something the other day about one of those books – Think like a Monk that he mentioned, that consciousness is the biggest way to live with, intention.  I mean it’s a word that everybody throws around and nobody knows what it is. However, self-awareness and consciousness is like hope. What I mean is, if you practice it and you live in it, then it’s the biggest thing that you can do in your life.

The other book title is “Developing Discipline”. Of course, as a professional golfer discipline is big. Discipline is the most fundamental component of being a good leader. Meanwhile, being a good leader starts always with self leadership, you have to be able to lead yourself well before you can lead others.

Thane – I’m all about growing self leadership for myself and for others. These two courses, I believe are going to help with self-awareness and discipline being fundamental aspects. In the two courses, what people can expect is they’re both eight-week courses and so it’s self-directed meaning – if you want to go faster or slower, you can.

I recommend eight weeks and that’s how it’s set up because it gives us enough time to really put these things into practice. Then thereafter, start shifting our identity and the way we see ourselves with these things so we can start saying I’m not just pursuing discipline, I am a disciplined person and that’s the shift that we want to make in those eight weeks.

Additional Resources

How to Transform your Career with Purpose

 

Six Holistic Ways to Find your Purpose

find your life purpose

Are you on a quest to, find your purpose?  It is the only way to find fulfillment and the secret to happiness.  Dr. Ken Keis shares six holistic approaches or benchmarks in your quest for, purpose.

Intro to our topic:

Dr. Ken Keis, is a highly sought-after author, speaker, trainer, podcast host, and TV and media guest. His latest books include: Why Aren’t You More Like Me?, Deliberate Leadership, and The Quest For Purpose.

 

A story on how to find your purpose

So many people listening have been trapped down a pathway that was really sort of conditioned from their background. I woke one morning and asked myself if this was what I wanted to be doing in 20 years from now, and the answer was no. So, I immediately took action. I decided to quit farming and hired a coach to help me figure out what I wanted to do in life. My, quest to, find my purpose,  began. What was my purpose in life? The answer, to help others to live, lead and work on purpose. This is the question to, find your purpose.

My coach passed away from cancer many years ago now, and I just took his process and then added and enhanced it. Basically it was a self-discovery narrative and an interactive sort of process to, find your purpose.

What are the six Holistic approaches to, find your purpose?

A lot of times what happens people don’t realize their, purpose, because the question is too big. It’s overwhelming and what we’re trying to do here is get people to fine tune all the components of their life to go to the next level.

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Benchmarks to Finding your Purpose

So let’s go through these benchmarks to, find your purpose.

1. First Benchmark is, Personal Style, CRG is an assessment company. In our quest to, find your purpose, one of our assessments is called “the personal style indicator.” We believe that we are all born with a certain Personal style. Not right not wrong and we develop and we change and we mature in life but our personal style never changes. Myrna is the same Myrna from 10 years ago. In other words Myrna can wake up in the morning and still count on Myrna being Myrna.

2. Biophysical Influences, like Health concerns, physical and mental disabilities. The statistics of North American health is that 75 to 80 percent of people are unwell at some level and another 50 percent are diabetic or pre-diabetic. So there’s no way if I am thinking of, finding my purpose,  if I’m sick. I don’t have energy, I have chronic fatigue syndrome, I have immunity disorder or whatever is going on. 90 to 95 percent of all illness is lifestyle related. In my quest to, find my purpose, I need to take my body and treat it well. If I have a racehorse and I don’t take care of that racehorse and then try to have it win the Kentucky Derby, it’s not going to happen.

Soundcloud Transform your mind podcast
Transform your Mind Soundcloud podcast

3. Self-worth – What you think of yourself. We have another assessment called “the self-worth inventory” to, find your purpose,  our confidence levels highly influence the decisions we make or not make. So maybe you actually have an idea of your, purpose, but you don’t have the courage to step into it.

4. Environmental systems – Schools , workplace, culture. We are a product of our environment. If I grew up in Florida versus LA or New York, Toronto or Vancouver versus Afghanistan, I’m going to have a different perspective on life and possibly a different path to, find my purpose.

5. Social Teachers – Parents, teachers, pastors As a kid you you very curious. You watched how your parents interacted, they’re teaching you how to treat others. The songs you listened to there’s now linkage towards violence and video games. In your quest to, find your purpose, be aware of what you’re letting in, who you’re working with, who are nurturing your personal relationships.

6. Emotional Anchors or triggers – Divorce, physical and verbal abuse, death of a loved one are all triggers. Any kind of event in life that causes either positive or negative associations becomes a trigger. Every single person listening or reading has triggers. You had an event in life that creates an emotional response. This goes back to a trigger that has been anchored, in many cases these triggers are subconscious. In your quest to, find your purpose, you don’t realize your, purpose, because you’re angry. You can also have unforgiveness. You have not really released yourself of this traumatic event. I had my girlfriend when I was 21 years old murdered by a friend of mine. If I didn’t let go of that event from 1982, it would affect me forever.

7. Spirituality, – This is a bonus because it covers everything. We are spiritual beings have a human experience. All of these seven benchmarks, come together to develop the whole person. They are essential in our quest to, find your purpose. That’s why developing all these areas is critic to finding your, life purpose.


Transform your mind iTunes link

 

Because we are spiritual beings having a human experience, our thoughts are so powerful. What you believe is the environment in which you live. Dr Bruce Lipton talks about the fact and the fact that our perceptions affects our reality.

Spirituality, is also consciously spending time developing yourself. It is a fact that you create your world. Most of us believe that we are product of circumstances; but if you believe that you actually can design and create your world, that’s what you will create. So yes, spirituality, the spiritual part of you is very important to, finding your purpose.

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Transform your Mind Stitcher
Transform your Mind Stitcher

Conclusion

Very powerful conversation with Dr. Ken Keis. Dr Keis is the author of “The Quest for Purpose” A self-discovery process to find it and live it!
To listen to the full episode, download on iTunes, Google play, Sticher, TuneIn radio, iHeart radio.

To quickly summarize, Dr. Keis gave us seven personality development models called benchmarks, that can help you in your quest to, find your purpose, we talked about personality style, we talked about wellness and stress and how it affects how you show up in life, we talked about, self-worth and self-confidence. How that affects what you go after. We talked about the, environmental systems, where you were born and what your parents expect you to become. We talked about, social teachers, the news and our, emotional triggers. If something bad happened to you a lot of times, people can’t get over it. This event hijacks them and it controls most of their thinking.

We talked about, spirituality, which is all-encompassing because we are spiritual beings and what we believe, has one of the most predominant effects in your quest to, find your purpose.

Download a FREE eBook version of Dr Ken Keis book “The Quest for Purpose”

Remember to subscribe to the podcast on iTunes, iHeart radio, and please leave a review if you find this podcast Helps you Live Your Best Lives Now!

Additional Resources:
https://blog.myhelps.us/how-to-awaken-to-your-souls-purpose/
https://blog.myhelps.us/how-can-millennials-find-their-purpose/
https://blog.myhelps.us/how-to-become-a-diamond-by-finding-your-purpose/
https://blog.myhelps.us/how-to-become-lifted-by-your-purpose/
https://www.huffpost.com/entry/the-quest-for-purpose_b_6575194
https://www.forbes.com/sites/danpontefract/2016/02/04/the-story-of-candice-and-her-quest-for-purpose-at-work/

How to be Happy with Less

Finding Beauty in your now

What does it take to be happy? We live in a culture where, happiness, is largely based on external forces – like what we get and what we achieve. And when our life conditions don’t match our expectations, we experience pain and fear, we suffer. But imagine what it would feel like to create a constant sense of inner peace and freedom, and live each day in a beautiful state of, happiness.

Listen to the podcast here:

What’s preventing you from, happiness, and living a life of peace and joy?

Do you believe that others make you happy or are responsible for your, happiness? I used to think so.  Until I realized that the definition of, happiness, is true.  Happiness, is moving in the direction of your goals and dreams. So because my, happiness, comes from my thoughts and actions, I take away the responsibility of my spouse, friends, co-workers being responsible for my, happiness.

I encourage you to Discover what’s holding you back from being happy. Tap into finding inner peace through meditation and mindfulness that you can use to start living in the, present moment. Happiness, is only found in the present moment. Not in the future or the past. This is the time to sit with your feelings of, unhappiness, pain and regret and maybe find the lesson in them.

Once you sit with pain and, unhappiness, and not try to mask it with drugs, food or any of the things you do to not feel your pain, you can step into the unknown, and allow life to unfold in the beautiful way it is meant to.

https://blog.myhelps.us/how-to-find-happiness-in-2017/

How to be Happy in life,  in the present moment

One of the ways I live in the, present moment, is I become aware of the little things that is taking away my, happiness.  The small irritations like my husband not answering the phone when I call or my kids leaving the house and saying where they are going.

Learn, how to be happy in life, in the, present moment. No one is responsible for your, happiness. If you live in the present moment then the hurts from the past can’t bother you.  I remember when Jennifer Gardner was being interviewed about the betrayal of Ben Aflac. He had cheated on her and they were separated and there was a big scandal.  Jennifer tried to stay in the, present moment, and be thankful for her 4 kids. She also said that Ben was not responsible for her, happiness. She alone is responsible for her, happiness.

Great lesson because when we give our power away, people will always trample on us.  Life gives sand life takes away.  The trick to, happiness, is not to be attached to the outcome.

3 Ways to Find Happiness After a Divorce

How to be happy in life, by relaxing and releasing

When I feel the, unhappiness, or irritation coming on me, I practice R&R  relax and release. When you feel that unwanted frustration you relax breathe deeply and release blow it out. Breathe deeply and blow it out through your mouth.

I learnt this in therapy.  When a situation makes you, unhappy, and you don’t attend to the hurt or pain.  We stuff it down. We are not aware of what we are doing but we are hard wired to move away from pain and move towards pleasure, so when we feel pain or, unhappiness, we run from it.

So we self medicate with drugs, alcohol, food, sex, or whatever is around.  In that way, we bury the pain.  Whenever something is in the vicinity of this pain, we feel this tension in our gut because that is where we stored this pain.  We begin to be, unhappy and we are not even sure why so we again stuff it down with drugs, alcohol, food and sex.  We never want to feel.

To stop this cycle.  Whenever you feel this feeling.  Don’t try to stuff down instead relax into it.  Feel the pain, sit with it. Then breathe.  Breathe to relax into it and then breathe it out. Try it next time some external situation makes you, unhappy.

5 Ways to Radiate on the Happiness Wheel

How to be Happy in life, with Less

In the, pursuit of happiness, material things such as money, a big house, fame, or fancy cars do not make us happy.  Instead we need to first love and accept ourselves to be happy.  Money or fame magnifies our, unhappiness, because now you are not sure who your friends are and you become obsessed about keeping this wealth.

How to be happy in life, with less is learning to find happiness in relationships, with family, with health, with being alive.

Daily habits to find, happiness 
  1. Smile. You tend to smile when you’re happy. …
  2. Exercise. Exercise isn’t just for your body, it is for the mind.  It releases endorphins for, happiness.
  3. Get plenty of sleep, serotonin, the feel good hormone is released during sleep.  That is why we are bitchy and, unhappy, with lack of sleep.
  4. Eat with the, pursuit of happiness, in mind. …
  5. Be grateful. Gratitude is the forerunner to, happiness.  You can’t be, unhappy, if you are feeling, gratitude
  6. Give a compliment – giving a compliment makes other happy and that is turn makes you happy.  Happiness, is serving others.
  7. Breathe deeply. – breathing deeply releases tension in our muscles and relaxes the body.
  8. Acknowledge the unhappy moments – don’t try to stuff them down or ignore them. They are already here. Acknowledge them and let them know you see them and that this too shall pass. You will be able to look back at these moments and laugh one day.

 

How to Embrace Female Sexuality and the Divine Feminine

How to Embrace the Divine Feminine


Anahita Joon, Priestest and healer teaches us how to embrace our, female sexuality, and the, divine feminine by exploring our, sexual desires, and not being ashamed.

Anahita is the host of “God, Sex, and Everything in Between Podcast.  We are going to be specifically talking on the topic – “How to Embrace, Female Sexuality, and the, Divine Feminine.

Listen to the Full interview Here:

 

Bio – Anahita as a, divine feminine, leadership mentor and a credentialed spiritual counselor. She activates, the divine feminine, and  leadership of women who are ready to awaken and unleash the force of nature within. She mentors communities of women, doing the most cutting-edge work of full expression, pivoting and leveling up.

Born during the Islamic revolution of Iran, Anahita is a modern-day priestess, healer and medicine woman. Her work is the culmination of over 25 years of intensive study with mystic masters and Shamans, Social Research as well as over 10 years of our own teaching on, female sexuality,  embodiment and the, divine feminine.  She is committed to women living lives filled with love, beauty, pleasure and power while harnessing leadership and purpose and, the divine feminine.

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Introduction to the God, Sex, and Everything in Between

Tell us about your podcast” God, Sex, and Everything in between” What is your purpose on that podcast, what kind of topics you guys talk about?

Anahita – My whole mission in this life is to bridge the opposites that the experience that I’ve had in my journey as a seeker. My journey as a guide and, sexuality, coach has been really the beauty and good experience, basically those moments of illumination. They really are experienced when we bridge the opposites, when we merge the opposites and those could be anything that we hold in opposition in our thinking, that we hold binary in our thinking.

So a really relevant example of it that actually doesn’t have anything to do with the podcast, an example would be like what’s going on with the “Black Lives Matter” movement and the beauty that happens when there’s unification, when actually opposing energies come together and what that creates.

My journey was so impacted by the dogma of organized religion and the shame of, sexuality, through the vehicle of, God’s word. Then my journey became about actually being able to bow to all of it as sacred and to hold all of it in reverence.  To hold, sex, and obviously hold, God, in reverence and then everything in between.

Everything that would be in the gray, everything that we would want to name maybe good enough, not good enough, or over here, like all of it. We hold it all in reverence with, God, and we hold it all like the primordial primal desire of, sex. We just hold it all as one and in that place is where we actually find freedom, that’s where we find freedom.

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The Divine Feminine vs the Divine Masculine

We talk a lot about, sex, we talk a lot about, female sexuality, we talk also a lot a good amount about, God, and I speak a lot about leadership and the, divine feminine. What it is like for women to lead from a place of the, divine feminine, and how to really balance the, divine masculine,  and, the divine feminine,  energies in leadership.

We talk about plant medicine working with psychedelics, really trying to go to the places that would otherwise be taboo; but probably our listeners are either curious about or experimenting with just not talking to other people about it.

What is the Divine Feminine

Myrna – I did some research on our topic, the Divine feminine,  female sexuality,  the, sexual desire, part of it; but I wasn’t quite sure about the, divine feminine. What I found out about it is emerging energies as you mentioned the, divine masculine, and, divine feminine, energies which of course we will get into. I have some questions about women exploring their, sexual desires, and I just love the fact that you picked that topic, because you want to really empower women to be their best and to use their, feminine energy, whether it’s for leadership, or whether it’s for their, sexual desire.

I didn’t ask you about your background, but now I think I need to circle back a bit on it. You were born in Islamic revolution of Iran.  I don’t think women have a lot of power in that environment. How did you transfer into this leadership person and being able to be, sexually free,  and talking about, female sexuality? How did you traverse that terrain?

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Anahita – Well, I’m going to tie it back to what you were saying earlier about  leading from the, divine  feminine,  and then embracing my, sexual desires. I actually experienced and believed that we don’t lead from the, feminine, if we are disconnected from our, sexuality. They’re not actually separate; but it’s just like anybody’s story.

Our greatest oppression is usually the greatest opportunity for freedom and empowerment. So, that was my experience, because I was born who I am now – meaning I had a lot of wild, sexual energy.  I had a lot of sort of raw, feminine, life force and I was living in this highly oppressive culture especially oppressive to the, feminine, and to women.

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Female sexuality
Female sexuality

Why men try to control, female sexuality with oppression

There was a significant amount of shame around any expression of the,  feminine or, female sexuality; so it wasn’t just covering your hair. A lot of people don’t understand the extent of the oppression. It’s like sure, I could go out to the street at eight or nine years old and have a gun pointed in my head because my hair covering fell back.

That doesn’t just shame and oppress your femininity; but to this day it’s illegal for women to sing in Iran because their voices are considered so beautiful that they will seduce men into acts of, sex.  There is  plenty of absurdity happening now.

We’re more divided than we’ve ever been and this is basically what happened in Iran because it was a very oppressive culture.  Tehran where I was born and raised is a part of Iran.  I was born during the revolution, which used to be a very cosmopolitan city in the Middle East and it became something very different. It became much more divided and that’s the time that I was growing up. So, when you say how I got there, I mean it started with a desire to experience, sexual freedom,  and then not having oppression when I got to the states. I was 14 years old.

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Myrna – Why do you think that women who are, sexually free, in the States different from the Middle East? I laughed when you talked about the singing voices of women sexually arousing men and because of that they can’t sing! I believe that the man can control himself.

What I mean is in the United States, women walk around half naked. Are you’re thinking that you’re going to stop her from dressing half naked because a man can’t control himself? Totally different ways of approaching a problem here in your country, they’re muzzling the woman in the Middle East; but they should be telling the men that they should look at controlling their, sexual desires.

How, Female Sexuality,  is viewed in the Middle East

Anahita – Here’s the thing in the Middle East, if a woman gets raped,  she’s the one who brought shame onto the family. But understand that consciousness about, female sexuality. The consciousness that creates kind of law or that kind of regime is not absent here in the States. It manifests differently; but it’s the same consciousness.

Myrna – Women are told that exploring their, sexual desires, is bad. When I was growing up, a woman was not allowed to explore her, sexuality. A woman was not allowed to proposition a man, they had to wait around for the man to do all the work and I still have that in my head. So why do you think that women hold back and exploring their, sexual desires? Is it because I said how we were brought up or is there something else from your studies?

Anahita – There’s nothing else. I mean the, divine feminine, is  the greatest gift,  sexuality. When I speak about, female sexuality and the, divine feminine, it’s not about, sexual energy.  It is not the energy to seduce; but the inward facing, sexual energy.  That is an inward facing, eroticism, and  oneness with life. It’s the ability to just be able to taste life more, to be turned on physically by yourself.

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How do you control women? By controlling their, Sexuality

The greatest gift that we have is the, divine feminine,  it is the power of women. How do you control women? You shame their, sexuality,  because it is their greatest power.  Female sexuality, is the thing that makes them givers of life. It is their greatest power. It’s the only place (really the primary place) where men actually feel helpless in the face of women.

Therefore, the business of religion says we’re going to control this because if we control it and put a big cloud of shame over it, they will be in shame and we know shame is a very low frequency emotion.

How to embrace the Divine Feminine and the, Feminine Face of God

Myrna – What is, the divine feminine? Because, I think that’s a big piece here and a lot of people or a lot of my listeners including me don’t understand what it is. Can you explain what, Divine Feminine, is? Then, we can move on “how do women embrace it?” I think you talked from what I learned about it. Will you touch on the opposing, sexual energies? Is that the whole part of the, divine feminine energy?

Anahita – I want to say I wouldn’t be so presumptuous to say that the, divine feminine, needs me to explain what she is. What I mean what is the best way to explain what the, divine feminine,  is? The best way to embrace the, divine feminine,  is to just close our eyes and drop into our heart and connect with the greatest love of the, divine feminine, that you’ve ever experienced. It is the place of absolute faith, absolute trust, absolute surrender;  thy will be done.

That level of home with the, divine feminine, is a feeling that it is coming from a great mother. That it is a maternal feeling that it has that much love and permission and holding and allowing for you to be exactly as you are. So that it’s kind of like a way to taste her a little and that was my experience of her. It’s just that she, the divine feminine, had a lot more permission from me than the, divine masculine,  male,  God,  that my religion had introduced to me and there was not quite as much permission. When I found the,  feminine face of God, there was a lot more.

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The Divine feminine vs Mother Earth

Myrna – I love that. So is, the divine feminine, different from, mother earth, or is the same thing?

Anahita –  Well that’s the thing. It’s the same energy expressing in different ways. Another way to really come face to face with it is during child birth. If you’ve ever had the honor of giving birth or being in a room when a human being is born that divine mother is present there.

Myrna – When you were talking, that’s where I went. Actually, I mean even though I knew what it’s like to be in the presence of the Holy Spirit and be in that space, when you talked about, the feminine face of God, and, mother earth, on top of it. I went into my memory of giving birth as a mom.  You know how you feel about your children. I have two children, so it’s a divine mother.

I felt I understand that was a very good explanation. So why do you think when a woman embraces her, sexual desires, or embraces the, divine feminine, that it becomes a source of her power. Why does it become the source of our power?

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Divine Feminine conclusion

Anahita – My program “Beauty Unleashed” is a six month transformational program. It’s me putting together everything from  25-30 years of study, about 15 years of teaching and Facilitating Tantric sex and yoga and all of it. What I noticed was, as I was working with clients mostly privately, was that what the women who had the greatest success was becoming fully unapologetic. They were coming out of the magic closet and reclaiming their magical gifts, letting go of the fear of being ostracized or burned at the stake,  all of those shame fears.

Watch “Anahita My Tedx Talk” and stay in communication by Signing up for something free.

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Additional Resources

Transform Your Life: How to Use the Energy of Desire