Is There Life After Death? A Mother’s Story

Karen Johnson on life after death

When Karen Johnson’s 27 year old son died of a, heroin overdose, she started believing in, life after death, when her son showed up in his human form waving at her at the airport. In her book “Living Grieving” Karen shares how communicating with her son in the, afterlife,  helped her live with her, grief, and start her work as a, shaman, helping survivors and spirits deal with,  life after death.

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Bio

Karen V Johnson’s fast paced professional career as a Federal Judge came to an abrupt halt when she lost her 27-year-old son, Ben to a, heroin overdose. Rather than grieve in a way that made people around her comfortable, she did the unexpected. She quit her lifetime appointment career, sold her house with all her belongings, and went on a 2 ½ year journey around the world finding a spiritual and healing practice along the way.

Karen didn’t think she could ever find her way out of despair, but she found a process that works and shares her journey of transformation with others so they can heal too. Her work is structured around, shamanic, practices, mindfulness, and the journey of the Four winds Medicine Wheel.  Karen blends her personal story with meaningful experiences, offering exercises related to each of the four practices of becoming unstuck, becoming lighter, awakening, and creating a new life.

Ben’s Life After Death

Myrna: Can you share with the listeners your, grief, journey and the death of your son from a, heroin overdose. It’s a powerful story.

Karen: Ben, my son was 27 years old and he was struggling as many young men are trying to find himself trying to decide if he’s going to try to start a business go back to school, many things. And so, I was going on a vacation to South Korea for a week and I thought to myself, when I get back, we’re going to have the big conversation. I don’t care how uncomfortable it is.  And so I went to South Korea, and one day in the afternoon, I just wasn’t feeling well. and into the evening and then all of a sudden, I get this call, and they hang up.

I just had this feeling of dread. And so, I called the number and the detective answers and I say, you just called me I am Karen Johnson. He said, yes. where are you? And I said, I’m in South Korea. And he said, I have some bad news for you. I’m sorry, your son is dead from a, heroin overdose.  Ben had gone to a party with them some other young guys, and they got drunk and they decided, hey, we’re going to try, heroin, in all their 27-year-old wisdom.  My son was 6′ 8, 260 pounds and they gave him too much.

And he died almost instantly. He and I were very close and it just rocked my world. They say that the death of a child and an unexpected death are two worst ones to survive. So, when you have an unexpected death of a child, you’re in a bad place. But that’s the bad part of it. The other side of it is you know, it’s always the blessing and the curse. The Yin and the Yang. So, the other side of it was so the next morning, I couldn’t even get out of South Korea.

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Life after death: Seeing Ben in his human form

Believing in, life after death, started for me at the airport trying to return to the States. It was nighttime when I got the call, so sitting in the airport in South Korea, the next morning I see my son Ben in front of me, just like he is in life. And he’s smiling, his big old grin and then he fades away. So, I desperately frantically call my ex-husband, his father and say, you gotta check. I think he’s alive. I think he’s in that refrigerator and he’s trying to get out. I think he’s alive. You gotta go check. And so, they go check and call me back and very kindly say, no, I’m sorry he’s gone. And so that for me was a doorway.

Death. is always a doorway, it was the doorway into believing in, life after death. And it’s something that I did not believe in before. I didn’t have much of a spiritual practice. I would have said something like alive is alive, dead is dead. And so, my son Benjamin, woke me up to life on the other side, or, life after death, and he continues to do so to this day.

Myrna: That is one of the reasons I wanted to speak to you. I am wearing a sweater right now, but I’m getting chills. You said that was the first time that Ben appeared to you in his human form. The other times you said he was flapping around so I assume he appeared as a bird. I follow Sadhguru and he talks a lot about, life after death. And he said, whenever you die suddenly, from like, suicide, or a bullet or maybe like a, heroin overdose, or something, then your, spirit, can’t seem to find peace. So, do you think that is why Ben stuck around after his, death?

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Grief is a painful experience

Karen: Yeah, after Ben passed, I was in a state. My, grief, was so profound, I was so distraught that my bedroom was upstairs, I couldn’t get up the steps. So, I would be on the steps and I would be crying and screaming for Ben until I threw up. I was throwing up blood. I was truly a mess and I could feel him around me. I knew that he was around me just frantic. I couldn’t hear what he was saying although I could sense him. I couldn’t hear him so I did what my logical mind would never have done before I googled, mediums. To be exact, mediums, in Fairfax County, Virginia and this whole page popped up.

And so, one person’s picture looked a little bit larger than the others. And I thought, well, I’ll take that one. It turns out this is a way, spirit, has been guiding me now to buy a house and to do many things. Something looks different. And that’s how, spirit, communicates because we don’t always hear the words. We can’t always translate what, spirits, are saying. And so, I went to a, medium, about three weeks after he passed and I said, look he came in right behind me. He’s standing over there in the corner.

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Seeking out  a Medium to communicate with spirit

Can you tell me what he’s saying? I can’t hear him. And so, we had a wonderful session. And she told me things that really resonated because it sounded like him. Something like Mom, it was a boneheaded move, and things like that. That just sounded like him. And so, after it was all finished, he said, you know, you might have some abilities yourself because most of my clients have no idea that their loved one is right there in the room with them and there is, life after death.   So that was sort of the intro for me to begin studying, life after death, and, spirituality.

Myrna: Yeah, I think you said that you were Clair-sentience. I like what the, medium, said, spirits, are around us all the time, but a lot of us can’t feel them. I heard that one of the reasons that we can’t communicate with, spirits, is because when you die, your energy is at a higher frequency, and, spirits, has to lower their frequency in order for us to sense them or communicate with them and most of them don’t know how to do that. Is that true?

Karen: That’s my experience. It’s sort of like when you go to a Buddhist temple or you go into the Catholic Church or any church, they’re singing, there’s smoke, there’s prayer. It’s all a way of changing the vibration and the energy.

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Life after death: spirits need to transition

I think Ben’s energy couldn’t dissipate until he was able to reassure me, because my being frantic, that he was okay.  I think you stay stuck and in trauma, it prevents, spirits, from fully moving on and doing what they need to do on the other side. Yeah, because they are watching us, they’re seeing how you are dealing with, grief, and people say well if they go to heaven or nirvana or wherever you think that place is, how can they come back. But it’s not prison. So, they’re allowed to come back and forth easily and sometimes they’re a little stuck in between worlds, and they need help.

Myrna: Does Ben still come back and forth?

Karen: Oh, yeah. So, you know, I became a, shaman. I do, shamanic healing, part of, shamanic healing, is helping people to die and helping, spirits, to crossover in the other world. I help, spirits, transition to, life after death.  And so, I helped Ben to cross over and he comes back and forth. I’ll call him if I have a young person who’s committed, suicide, or sudden death or something.  Sometimes, suicides, get a little stuck because there’s so much bad talk about, suicide, that they’re going to hell and all this kind of stuff. And so, they’re afraid to cross over and the, after life.

They don’t know what to be, so I can call Ben and he’ll say, hey, man, come with me. I’ll show you the ropes. I’ll show you it’s beautiful on the other side, you have nothing to fear and then they’re able to cross over to the, after life, peacefully. So, we would kind of work together.

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Transform Your Mind Podcast Player FM

We had a lot of grief during the pandemic

Myrna: People have lost a lot of people over the, pandemic, and I’ve had some interviews on the show with wife’s losing spouses.  I’ve actually never had one with a mother losing a son. But the, grief, is profound. So, what kind of solace can we have? Should we be scared when we feel our loved one’s presence? What kind of advice you can give on that?

Karen: Yeah, so I think sometimes people say, I’d love to see my loved one but it I find it scary at the same time. I really don’t want them appearing. So, if you have that kind of dynamic going on, I think they don’t want to appear.  A lot of times we’re scared of our loved ones after they die. I don’t think before I saw Ben, that I would have said I wanted him to show up, but he just kind of showed up.  So, I think a lot of that goes on and it just depends how they show themselves to you.

Myrna: You went to the, medium, three weeks after Ben died. Did you find that your, grief, started to settle down after you could communicate with him? I know you’re still grieving seven years after his death, but did the intensity subside?

Karen: The intensity of my, grief, somewhat subsided.

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Shamanism Helps survivors deal with grief

Myrna: You said that, shamanism, allowed you to move through your, grief, on your healing journey. So, tell us what, shamanism, is.

Karen: About nine months after Ben passed, I had been in the spiritual world and learning things and growing and I had gone to an evolutionary astrologer who said, hey, I had another woman who had a reading like yours that became a, shaman. I went to Mr. Google and searched for, shaman, and Mr. Google said, try the Four Winds. I contacted their office and three weeks later I’m on a plane to Joshua Tree California.

I got there and I just loved it. That was the beginning of the, south direction, of the, medicine wheel.  The, south direction, of the, medicine wheel, is where you learn to shed your past, the way that a serpent sheds its skin. So, we’re looking at all our old wounds and things that are bothering us in trouble. These are ways of thinking and being all those things and we’re learning how to work with that how to let it go. A process called elimination. So that’s the first feeling medicine that we learned in the south direction.

Myrna: Okay, so they teach you how to shed your skin and how does, shamanism, do that? Do you do it by meditation? Do you do it by coaching?

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Google Podcast Transform Your Mind

Shamanism works with luminous energy to help with grief

Karen: The, shaman, work is working with the, luminous energy field, and we have a, luminous energy field, because when someone’s alive it’s vibrant, and when someone’s gone, it’s just not there. We have this field of energy around us. And so, what we do as, shamans, is learn to work with this, luminous energy field. And by the way, shamanism, is not a religious practice. We have, shamans, that are priests and rabbis, all sorts of people trained in using, energy medicine, to help people and so we do it by process called elimination.

Then we have what we call, medicine stones, and we use our, medicine stones, to help people heal the heart, we blow into our own wounds. And we work with them in different ways to energize these, medicine stones, and then other people can blow their wounds into the stones and then we use a process where we allow them to breathe in, breathe out. You know, the breath is a metaphor for, shamanic, work.  So, we’re breathing in newness and freshness and breathing out staleness and old ways.

So, we’re allowing them to breathe and release with a, medicine stone, on one of their, chakras. And then at the end of this process, we open to coaching. If you look at the pictures of the Christ and saints and the Buddha, all have this halo around them. So, we reach up into our Halo and open it up. And then we bring this divine light down into the person’s, chakra.

So, they’ve released heaviness, and we’re replacing it with divine light. And it’s profoundly healing so that’s how, shamans, work with energy.

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Deezer Transform Your Mind Podcast

Shamanic directions for healing grief

Myrna: Can you take us through the other three, shamanic, directions?

Karen: So, the,  south direction, and then we moved to the, west direction.  The West has to do with death and dying and, fear of death. Most of us are really afraid of, death, and dying, ours and people that we love. And so, we work with that and sometimes people have energies and entities that we learn to extract and take out in the west.

And then in the, north direction, we move to, hummingbird medicine. The West medicine is, Jaguar medicine, Jaguar who fearlessly calls whatever is dead and dying in the jungle and so we want to be like the Jaguar impeccable and calling whatever’s dead and dying within us. Then we move to, hummingbird medicine, and hummingbird teach us stillness in motion. It’s little wings are flapping and it’s still.

Myrna: And it’s always singing right?

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Shamanic practice and directions

Karen: Looking for food and looking for The Sweetest Nectar. Hummingbirds feast on nectar. They don’t go to the dung heap. They don’t go there. They go to the nectar of life. Right? So that’s that metaphor for drinking only from the sweetest nectar of life. So, hummingbird medicine, and then we end up with, Eagle medicine Eagle.

Eagles fly high. So you know Eagles have been the standard for the United States somebody that that flies high. It’s the only bird that flies over all the storms of life always looking for clearing and it has to do with destiny. So these direction in, Eagle medicine, has to do with finding your highest destiny, flying high being able to fly high over obstacles.

Myrna: That’s beautiful. I love it. What are some, mindfulness, tips that can help us with, grief and loss?

Karen: When I talked about my book is the journey of the bereaved and the journey of, grief,  is through transition, resurrection and rebirth and that’s the same process our loved ones go through. So their transition is from their physical form to the spiritual one. They resurrect on the other side. After a while they’re either reborn or maybe recycled into a new life or reborn into their after life.

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Grief is a journey of transformation

And so the, grief, this is our special journey because we go through transformation from having this person to not having this person. And then after a while, if if we can move some of this energy we can have this opportunity to resurrect to look around and say, Okay, so now what next? And then finally to get to the rebirth part where we actually use the energy of, grief, to create a new life out of the ashes of the old one which seems like a really unbelievable thing.

But when you think about other big events in life, like parenthood, and marriage, we know they have transformative energy. We know that life is never the same, life is gonna end with, grief. In our culture we want to avoid, death, because we associate it with sadness and despair. And so people that are grieving are often told, it’s time to move on. It’s time to get over it. Let’s not talk about that.

So oftentimes, people become even more stuck in their, grief, because they become isolated and alone and they know that will make people uncomfortable. What I’d like people to know is that, grief, is a journey. It’s not a one time thing and it has no time frame and your journey is going to be different than anybody else’s.

Never say to a grieving person, it’s time to move on. It’s time to just just let them be. Let them be, and allow them to go on this journey. So that they can use these practices.

Alchemizing the energy of grief

The, south direction, helps people shed their, grief. Each each direction has four practices associated what mindfulness things that people have heard in other contexts. So we talk about non judgement. So one of the practice non judgement who are you judging and who’s judging you? And when I ask people to approach these practices in a very ceremonial way, because we want to get out of our every day, reptilian brains.

Indigenous, alchemy, means native or inherent desire for, transformation. And I think we as humans are really hardwired for, transformation, and change. And when we keep ourselves stuck in, grief, that energy stays stuck in our body and it can make us sick. Years later, we can come up with big illnesses because we have so much unresolved, grief.

So what I like to suggest for people is to really work with these practices, each one they’re 16. And so if you really deeply do the work and take it to spirit there can be profound change that will enable you then to go to a party, have fun, maybe go on a date or whatever you choose, but we have to do a little spiritual work first.

Myrna: Tell us about your book “Living Grieving using energy medicine, alchemize grief and loss.”  Why did you write it? I know you wanted to share the story of your son.

Karen: So I wrote the book after I went on my spiritual journey and beginning shamanism. I ended up selling my home and all my possessions and I went on two and a half year trip around the world, trying to understand, grief and loss. It just seems so incomprehensible to me. It’s like this big elephant and how do you deal with this?

Book Living Grieving
Book: Living Grieving

Living Grieving

And and so I really thought at the beginning, I would just be writing a blog. You can find the book “Living Grieving” on Amazon. I do, shamanic, work I help people with, death, and dying people that are in the process of dying or people that have passed on. I also help widows and other people who are the survivors, I call us the survivors. And the book is really written for the survivors.

Additional Resources 

Master Lama Rasaji: Harmonizing Mind Body Spirit

Transform Your Mind With Alchemy

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The definition of, alchemy, is turning lead into gold.  That’s the meaning that we’re told to understand, but there’s so much deeper going on behind it. Turning lead into gold means turning something Heavy and impure into something precious.

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Bio

Vi Vi Thai, is a writer, truth seeker healer and fearlessly determined to live a free lifestyle, regardless of others opinions. In her book “Living Through Alchemy,” Vi seeks to dispel the myths beyond and behind, alchemy, shining and eliminated in light of this fascinating, esoteric practice; a compilation of a lifetime of soul searching.

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Book Living through Alchemy
Book Living through Alchemy

The book “Living Through Alchemy” blends the fields of art and science, painting a compelling picture of how, alchemy, manifests in your daily lives. Living her, life purpose, Vi helps others to find their path of freedom to live their authentic selves, because only then she feels that we can live a fulfilled life of happiness.

Today Vi is speaking to me from her camper with her dog and her, van life.   We are going to be embarking on a, journey of freedom, and, spirituality. Let’s start out by telling you what exactly is, alchemy?

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My introduction to Alchemy

Vi: I came across, alchemy, probably about seven years ago after I read the book “ The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho”. That book inspired me to embark on my, nomadic life,  and, van life, because Paulo,  loved to travel, and he wanted to travel the world. During that time, I was in a very dark phase of my life. I was very unhappy about my job, and everything else in my life. I was questioning the, meaning of life. I was asking myself questions like:

  • Why do I exist?
  • What’s my, life purpose? Because I was so unhappy.

Every day going to work, it felt like I was carrying a huge rock on my shoulder. I asked myself, am I supposed to live like this? Why did I go through 10 years of school, got a very high degree, got a very prestigious job in one of the best hospitals in the US and I am still depressed?

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At this time, I came across this book; but I didn’t understand anything about, alchemy, at that time. So, I thought it was a really cool story about traveling. I didn’t know that there’s so much, esoteric, meanings that were embedded in this book. Not until last year when I was writing a book about my, van life. When I decided to go deeper into my, nomadic life, and, van life, I realized that it had to do with my spiritual journey and, freedom.

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My Nomadic Life and Alchemy

I wanted to live in a van, because I didn’t want to go back to the corporate life. I wanted to have more time for myself, to learn who I am and follow my passion.

That’s the reason I changed my, lifestyle; I wanted to live simply in a very low-cost way, and mainly focus on what I love to do the most. I just followed that passion and where it led me.  That was the biggest thing I learned from the book, The Alchemist.  I learned from that book is just to follow your heart and so that’s how it led me here. And during that the writing process of my book, I stumble upon a show about, alchemy.  Everything happened like, synchronicity.

Myrna: My last podcast was on the topic of, synchronicity, which states that there’s no coincidences in life!

Vi Vi: I started seeing, synchronicity, happen all around me. So, when I was writing the book, I came upon this show called “Mystery Teachings” presented by Teresa fuller on Gaia Network.

Myrna: I am not picking up, what is  alchemy, can you give us a definition of it?

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What is Alchemy

Vi Vi: The definition of, alchemy, is turning lead into gold.  That’s the meaning that we’re told to understand, but there’s so much deeper going on behind it. Turning lead into gold means turning something heavy and impure into something precious.

However, the goals of, alchemy, went far beyond simply creating some golden nuggets.

The history of alchemy, was rooted in a complex spiritual worldview in which everything around us contains a sort of universal spirit, and metals were believed not only to be alive, but also to grow inside the Earth. When a base, or common, metal such as lead was found, it was thought to simply be a spiritually and physically immature form of higher metals such as gold. To the, alchemists, metals were not the unique substances that populate the Periodic Table, but instead the same thing in different stages of development or refinement on their way to spiritual perfection.

Myrna: That’s beautiful It’s almost like turning coals into diamonds, same kind of thing.

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Stages of Alchemy

In order to understand, what is alchemy, you need to understand the, stages of alchemy, and how It transmuted. So, alchemy, refers to the stages of transmutation. It’s sort of spacious and through that process you transform into a different form.  Similar to how the caterpillar transforms into the butterfly. Just like the caterpillar it has to go through the stages.

The 7 stages of Alchemy
  1. Calcination – This stage refers to the breaking of our attachments to the worldly.
  2. Dissolution – The chemical process of dissolution is to take the ashes from calcination and dissolve it in water.
  3. Separation – In this stage the, alchemist, separates and filters the products of dissolution.
  4. Conjunction – Here the, alchemist, is at peace with both the perceived “darker” aspects of the self, and the mask that they need to wear when interacting with the world.
  5. Fermentation – Fermentation is essentially, all about testing this newly integrated self. We test ourselves through trials and tribulations, through the natural swings that life provides us.
  6. Distillation – To prepare for the final stage, we need to purify the spirit to make sure that it is free from any destructive forms of ego
  7. Coagulation – Here, there is the meeting between matter and spirit, inner and outer, good and evil, the union of dualities. It is at this stage of, spiritual alchemy, where the spirit has become self aware – it perceives itself, and it sees and understands that the inner world and the outer world are not different, but reflections of each other.
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Alchemy and the Seven Chakras

The, stages of alchemy, also connect us to the, energy portals, in the body the, chakras.  All your, chakras, also connect you to the, seven laws of the universe, and once you go through the process and stages of, alchemy, you perceive the world without dualities and embrace consciousness.

Once you travel through an the, stages of alchemy, you open up your third eye chakra, and remove the blockage of the Pineal Gland.

Myrna: Everything you’re saying I understand.  I do energy work with my, chakras, and I am reading  Deepak Chopra’s book right now “The Seven Spiritual Laws of Success.”

Vi Vi: It’s a very natural process.  It happens to everyone because The Universe wants you to transmute; change is the only constant.  So in, alchemy, everything has to transmute. The universe wants to protect itself and that’s why we all have to go through the process of transmutation.

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Transform Your Mind Podnews

Transform your mind with Alchemy

The beauty of, alchemy, is that once you understand all of these stages, then you’ll be able to have a different perspective about your life. When you have a different perspective, then you have different thoughts. You look at things differently.

Once you have different views, you have different actions so you do things differently. So with, alchemy, we are creating a different reality. Through this process of letting go and purifying, you start to, transform your mind, as well.

When you go through this process of purifying, you travel through the, seven chakras, and the, Kundalini energy, is activated. When you open up all your, chakras, the energy is lighter. So, once it is opened up, it gives the light the passage for the, Kundalini energy, to rise through the, chakras.

As the Kundalini energy rises to the, sixth chakra, your third eye, this allows you to see with intention and access to the spiritual realm. We have blockages in our, third eye charka; we all have blockages is in our, chakras. So, the end result is the healing of these blockages.

Kundalini Energy

Myrna: I’m familiar with, Kundalini energy, I do, Kundalini meditation.  This energy is like a snake that goes up your nervous system.  I practice thinking of the, Kundalini energy, moving from my, seventh chakra, and going all the way up to my, first chakra.

Vi Vi: I teach about the, 7 stages of alchemy, and people can find my book on Amazon, it will soon be available everywhere, but for now it is only on Amazon. The title of the book is “Living Through Alchemy, a transformational journey to freedom.” And they can also go to my website www.livingthroughalchemy.com , and that’s where they learn more information about the book and I have my book trailer on there. They can also download a free copy as well of the first chapter.  In the first chapter I walk people through the, meaning of alchemy, and explain the, stages of alchemy. Follow Vi Vi on Instagram at @smileyvivi05

Check out Vi Vi YouTube channel https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC6_bnIuxOak50QN3QB_jUkg

 

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Additional Resources

Nothing is Impossible: How to Turn Life’s Challenges Into Opportunity

 

 

How to Use Yoga to Change your Life

detoxing the body and soul

 

Yoga, is a journey to know yourself through, self observation, awareness, and compassion. It opens your, heart chakra, so that you can be open to give and receive love. Yoga, allows you to use your Body to Change your Life.

Using Yoga to open up the Chakras

With various, Yoga, poses we activate the seven, chakras, in our bodies through which energy flows through. When we have blocked, energy, this leads to disease and illnesses, depression and other emotional stress. So, It is important to Use your body to change your mind.

Today’s guest is Health coach and, yoga instructor, Ms Zhengzi Wang.

Zhengzi shares with us how to open our each of our seven, chakras, with, yoga, poses to help us with confidence, intimacy, our presentation skills and our connection to God and the Universe. She teaches us how to use our body for health.

So I hope you will listen to this podcast and share with someone you know could find this information helpful.
Also download and subscribe to this podcast for weekly podcasts on life changing issues that will change your life by changing your mind.

Using Yoga and Meditation to change your life

As a certified Life coach, I coach my clients to be the peace they are seeking. Don’t have an external locus of control.
Each and every cell in your body holds oxygen for only 3 seconds, so your body operates on trust that it will get it’s supply of oxygen from the Universe. We need to find that trust in our every day lives. We need to trust that God will provide as he provides for the lilies in the valley.

When we find time to have a mind and body connection with, yoga, meditation, prayer,  we are able to pay attention to guidance from the universe through our seventh, chakra, our connection to God and the Universe. We can’t hear God unless we are still.

Listen to find out how to use your root, chakra,  for self confidence, how to use your throat, chakra, to help you with your speech and presentation and my most interesting, chakra, the second chakra. This is the chakra that seek out our mates, is responsible for our comfort with intimacy.

We could all learn something about spiritual communication from the second, chakra.

Finally, are you in a job you love? Are you living your life with passion?
If not, get some tips on starting your own business while working at your current job.

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Transform your Mind Soundcloud podcast

Chakra Yoga

Chakras yoga, are the energy channels in the body through which the prana (our life force) flows. Although there are various different ones, there are 7 most commonly known.

These are:

  • The root chakra,
  • the sacral chakra,
  • solar plexus,
  • heart chakra,
  • throat chakra,
  • third eye and
  • the crown chakra.

When the, yoga, chakras are activated and in balance, the prana flows freely and the physical, mental and emotional bodies are in harmony. However, when one or more, chakra yoga,  are out of balance, this can also create disharmony within. Asana practice is an effective way to create equilibrium between all parts of the self and live with clarity, purpose and be aligned with all parts of the self. This, yoga, sequence is one which can be practiced when feeling physically, mentally, emotionally and/or energetically out of balance. However it is also important to know that in order to maintain balanced, a consistent practice of, yoga, beneficial and indicated.

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Additional Resources

Using Muse Guided Meditations to Reduce Stress

 

www.myrnayounghelps.com

How to Find your Soul Mate or Twin Flame

soulmate vs twin flame

Are you a single woman hoping to, find your soul mate?  What about your, twin flame, who is your mirror, soul. Science says that when you meet your  Life partner, some thing magical happens. In this blog we look at what happens when two, souls, with constructive energies meet?

Listen to the full interview here:

In our last episode my co-host and I looked at what, single women, need to do to get their house ready for love, where to look for love and what to look for when you are starting over after divorce or death of a partner.

If you missed that episode you can download it here: https://blog.myhelps.us/how-single-women-find-love/ or on iTunes ,iHeart radio or wherever you get your podcasts. 

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Today’s episode of the Transform your Mind Radio Hour is sponsored by  Columbus Financial Coach.  Are you in a deep hole of “Financial Depression” with nowhere to turn for help? Constantly being harassed by collection agencies? Then visit Columbus Financial and success coach. www.columbusfinancialcoach.com

Introduction

 How to, Find your Soul mate,  the Science of Attraction

In the last Blog post, I shared how I met my husband on a train. I am going to use this personal story to illustrate what happens when two strangers or, souls, meet for the first time.

As you may remember from Chemistry class, every atom and molecule gives out and absorbs light. The human body is made up of 50 trillion cells composed of atoms and molecules. So we are massive bundles of energy giving off and absorbing light or energy all the time.

When two energies come together they become entangled, the first step to, find your soul mate, is constructive energy.

When two energies are in harmony, the result is called, constructive energy, because it increases in size.  That is why you should grow as a person when you are in the right relationship.

We call this, “good vibes” very important when you are hoping to, find your soul mate. 

How Chemistry plays in finding your Soul Mate

So let’s look at what happened when I met my husband and our energies became constructive!

I walked onto a train and he was standing by the door. I looked fine, mini skirt, sunglasses, designer bag over my shoulder,  so I caught his attention. He caught my attention because he was the first black officer I had seen on the train.

On be known to me my second Chakra or energy center in charge of communication sent him a signal because he tells me he felt this warm feeling in his body. He had never felt that before. Let me put a pin here and explain.

Our bodies are made up of seven energy centers, called Chakras. Each of these energy centers are responsible for certain functions.  I know that my second Chakra located below my navel is my communication center and it is responsible for engaging a mate by sending out signals when it finds a compatible energy so you can, find your soul mate.

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Soul mate vs Twin flame

My husband could also be my, twin flame.  After 14 years of marriage, I do believe we are mirror souls. What Is A Twin Flame? Sometimes discussed in terms of a “mirror soul” or, soul connection, a, twin flame, is the other half of your, soul. It is theorized that a, soul, can split into two after ascending to a high frequency. Thereafter, the, soul, lands in two different bodies.

I must have also received something from my husband’s energy center as well because my thoughts lingered on him. I was curious. That was all that it was for me at that time. Curiosity. I was not actively looking to, find a  soul mate.

But I have heard men say that the first time they saw their wife they knew that she was the one. There is such  a thing as love at first sight! Have you heard Steve Harvey tell his story of when he met his wife and, how he found his, soul mate?.  I don’t think he was actively trying to, find your soul mate. But there she was. He was doing stand up comedy and she walked in late with her girlfriends, and he couldn’t stop staring at her.  In fact he couldn’t even continue his act.  He told her right then that she was going to be his wife! Believe in compatible energy, it is real.

Anyway, back to my story. Because our energies entangled and we both got, good vibes, we looked to further the communication.

The, Soul mate Connection, is Immediate

Another pin. That is why we shouldn’t chase men.  if you guys have, constructive energy, or, good vibes, they will reach out. We are hard wired to mate. It is all happening without our conscious thought. Your soul is looking for it’s, twin flame.

So my husband searched for me on the train every day until he found me. I noticed him sit behind me for a few mins while he got up the nerve to come talk to me. We talked for about 30 mins until I got off the train at my stop. I will confess that I was not impressed by the conversation. He cursed like a sailor. I think that men who curse in front of women have no respect; but when I got off the train my energy body told me that it had made a, soul connection.

I had this incredible feeling of euphoria!  My stomach was doing somersaults. I knew right then that we would have a relationship. I knew right then that I had found my, soul mate, This is how you, find your soulmate, you listen to your body.

Three months later he proposed we were married 8 months after. That was 13 years ago and we are still in love, compatible energies!

Soul mate Meaning

This is an example of the science of two, compatible energies, something we have no control over.  That is why you have heard people say we have no control over who we love. You can’t pick your, soul mate. The science of attraction brings him or her to you.

Your, soul mate meaning,  two souls joining together to perfect each other.

On the other hand when your energy is not in sync with other, we get, bad vibes, not your, soul mate.  The energy cancels each other out and instead of feeling euphoria you feel depleted.

Energy is your most important reading as a single woman looking for a mate. Ever heard the saying that someone is like an anchor, you can’t thrive since you met them.  Pay attention that means that you are not expanding, you are contracting or stuck.

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Illustration  the Science of, Attraction, the bad vibe

Rhonda met this great guy at a bar. The guy was gorgeous, absolutely delicious. He pursued and seduced her and they started, dating. They had a great time together but something didn’t click. He was kinda, sorta vague on his explanation about everything.

It took about three months of, dating, this guy for Rhonda to discover that he was still living with his daughter’s mother and another 6 months to understand that theirs was an on and off relationship. He would never under any circumstances spend the night, saying that he did not want his daughter to wake up and he was not there.  This reminds me of Whitney Houston’s married relationship in Waiting to Exhale!

This is when Rhonda realized that a married man is a married man.  They can string you along forever. They can tell you anything.  She decided to breakup.  The breakup was mutual but she wasted at least 2 years on a relationship that was going nowhere when if she had paid attention to her, bad vibes,  she could have saved herself from heartache.

Reading energy is the most important data in the, dating, world.

Be careful of Psychopaths while looking to, find your  Soul Mate

Have you ever met a psychopath? Or been in a relationship with one? They are masters at reading energy.

We are all broadcasting a frequency of our most innermost thoughts. That is how a predator picks out his prey.

  • That is how a mugger chooses his victim.
  • Animals also know how to read this energy.  A lion picks his prey from a flock. He reads the vibration of the weakest prey.

I am sure everyone on the planet is aware on some level of the Art Kelly crimes against teenage girls and women. How do you think he chose his victims?  Women who would allow him to disrespect their bodies and lock them up in a room and  have to ask to go to the bathroom and ask to eat?  Some said that he didn’t feed them for 3 days, yet they didn’t leave. As one of his victims said in an interview.  If you were weak minded, he wants you. You could be a teenager or a 30 year old woman!

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Science of, attraction,  reading vibrations when looking to, find your soul mate?

Synergistic relationships are based on both individuals being on the same wavelength, when they completely understand each other and don’t try to limit the space they occupy in each other’s lives.

I read an article that stated the whole is greater than the sum of its parts.  The examples used was if you train two Belgian horses together, the effect is multiplied: together, they can pull 32,000 pounds. Two horses, doing the work of four, even though it seems to defy physics. Often, in a positive relationship, you’ll find that synergy is already happening.

How can you increase that by finding harmony, in acknowledging individual strengths and how they work best together?  For example, I love to shop; but I don’t necessarily like to cook all the time.  My husband, will send me a list of all the items to pick up the grocery store and he will cook.  I then just have to do keep the kitchen tidy and get the family read to enjoy his great cooking.  It works for both of us.

In regards to signs women should look out for in predators, Robert Hare, one of the world’s foremost experts on, psychopathic behavior, believes that people need to know what to do in the event they find themselves involved or associated with a predatory psychopath.

Here are his tips on How to Avoid being targeted by a predator when trying to, find your soulmate:

  1. Be careful of props—the winning smile, the promises, the fast talk, and the gifts meant to deflect you from the manipulation and exploitation that may be occurring. Any of these characteristics can have enormous sleight-of-hand value, serving to distract you.”
  2. Anyone who seems too perfect is. Psychopaths hide their dark sides until they get their target person deeply involved. Too much flattery, feigned kindness, and cracks in grandiose stories should provide clues and put you on your guard. Make reasonable inquiries.
  3. Know yourself—or you might be vulnerable from your blind spots. Predators know how to find and use your triggers, so the more you realize what you tend to fall for, the more closely you can guard against it.

 

The second stage in the Science of Attraction, is Chemistry

I know you have heard this word thrown around all the time. For example the dating sites match people up by common interests; but they can’t manufacture chemistry.

Let’s get back to my husband for a minute.

I just shared all about the our first meeting and about us having good vibes but if we had no chemistry we would just become good friends.

Here are the Chemicals released  by love that is responsible for Chemistry:

  • Dopamine – Lights up your pleasure center. Your pleasure goes up when you are near or think about this person. Your  motivation goes up, Now you are thinking of that nice house and 2 kids! Your sadness goes down, if you were depressed, you are now happy.

I know you have heard the saying love is blind. It is true. Dopamine make you more attractive to your mate and since we are on this planet to procreate, your sexuality goes up! I am sure you have heard or have personal data that new lovers do it all the time!

  • The second chemical that is released in love is Oxytocin  – Oxytocin is responsible for trust. Your level of trust goes up, and your attachment goes up. This is probably why your girlfriends can’t figure why you are going out with a player;  but you don’t see it until your heart is crushed. The psychopath uses this one to his advantage.
  • Finally Serotonin is released. – This hormone is responsible for all the pain attached to love. Serotonin goes up and you become obsessed with your lover. Love is a chemical addiction!

Thank God I have only had one experience with an over abundance of this hormone.

I met one of my boyfriends at a club and it was an instant attraction. I fell hard.  I swooned when he called me baby the next day!

Less than 2 months after we met, we made plans to spend the New Year in Jamaica.  He left before Christmas but I wouldn’t leave my kids for Christmas so I made plans to meet him in Jamaica after Christmas.   It was the longest week in my entire life.  I literally looked at the clock the entire time.  I was an addict! I however did not, find my soulmate.

Arifah what can you lend to this conversation from a social worker perspective?

Wow, Myrna glad you spoke about the hormones.  I always talk to my clients about increasing their Oxytocin through touch, such as a hug, holding hands, a kiss.  Everyone has a sensitive area on the body that causes arousal when touched, whether sexual or just to feel good. It’s important in a relationship to know what your partner likes and does not, to give each other compliments and share tips on how increase synergy between each other.  It’s important to always reminisce on moments, like when you first met, knew you were in love and what you admire about one another now.  All of this, helps build connection.

In general the most salient characteristics for chemistry between two people are mutual interest (reciprocal candor, reasonableness, intimacy,

Similarity, and physical attraction.

 

Here are some questions from my Life Coach group on Facebook on How to, Find your Soul mate?

Remember you have an open invitation to join this group to get answers from the group on any of your struggles in life.

Question from Velma: I would like to, find your soul mate, but most men in my age group 60, want a traditional woman to cook and clean and a man to think for her. I’m not a traditional woman and I’m tired of pretending to be helpless. How do we as women maneuver in a world of the insecure man?

My answer – be both cake and ice-cream. Sometimes you are soft like ice cream and sometimes you are in charge and embrace your masculine energy and be cake.

What’s your answer Arifah

Keep doing what you love and make yourself a priority to level up.

Question from Elizabeth:

Should I be looking to, find your soul mate,  of just someone to keep me warm at night?

When you are in your fifties and you have to start all over dating, do you date to find a husband or should you be okay with someone to keep you warm at night.

My answer- Someone to keep you warm at night. Women over 40 have a very slim chance of finding a husband, but you can definitely, find your soul mate!

What’s your answer Arifah?

Its up to you, based on what you are looking for in the present.  Dating, can work either way, based on what you end up wanting.

Arifah is the Founder and Program Director of Lifted by Purpose.

Lifted by Purpose Provides a diverse range of services to organizations seeking trainings, workshops or programs with the intent to engage youth in conversations about mental health and learn practical strategies to cope with life stressors. Including:

  • Anger Management
  • Healthy Relationships
  • Mental Health Education and Coping Skills
  • Youth Engagement and
  • Mental Health First Aid Training

Located at 180 Shaw St, suite 201, Toronto, Ont.  Phone # 416-391-5270

 Additional Resources for, How to Find your Soulmate

https://blog.myhelps.us/sex-and-spiritual-energy-the-tree-of-life/

 

Is the Secret to Love, Sex?

The Alchemy of Desire

How To Use Vibrational Energy For Attraction

https://sitn.hms.harvard.edu/flash/2017/love-actually-science-behind-lust-attraction-companionship/