Why We Have Trust Issues in Relationships

Trust, is earned, trust, is central to every relationship and, trust, is about intention.  We have, trust issues, when we have fear of betrayal, or abandonment. This fear is often triggered as a result of past betrayal e.g. a spouse cheating on you.  Abandonment, e.g your parents left you with your grandparents and never came back.

In this episode of 5 min Fridays with coach Myrna we look at 4 types of trust what they are and how you can cultivate them in your relationships to avoid, trust issues.

Download the Podcast here: 

https://pdcn.co/e/https://chrt.fm/track/897G7/www.buzzsprout.com/1761155/11474504-why-we-have-trust-issues-in-relationships.mp3?download=true

How to develop trust in relationships

There are 4 types of trust are Care, competence, consistency, and character.

Let’s dissect each of these

Care – When we care about your partner, we put our emotions in their hands, they care about what’s best for you and not what’s best for them. They care about your well being.  Examples of care are going beyond the call of duty to help you move, accompany you to a doctor’s appointment etc. We develop, trust issues, if when we need help, physical or emotional and no one is there to care for us.

A perfect example is if you have surgery and is totally dependent on your partner’s help for basic services like bathing, toilet or food and they abandon you. You would be scared for life and develop major, trust issues, in the future.

Goodpods Transform Your Mind podcast
Goodpods podcast

Competence – The second type of trust is, competence.  You trust that your partner is competent to handle financial matters. If you are sick, competence, to handle your care and make decisions that are best for you and not best for them. You, trust, their opinions and recommendations.

When you go into surgery that is life threatening, you will be asked to draw up a living will and a power of attorney. You need someone, competent, to handle not only the financial obligations but to talk to the doctors and make sure that you are receiving the best care.

Transform Your Mind podcast curiocaster podcast
curiocaster podcast

Trust issues and Character

Character – When we talk about, trust, we are usually talking about a high moral compass or the, character, of our partner. We look to these people when we are not sure what is right and follow their lead. These people practice what they preach and are valuable in interdependent relationships. They have good reputation, strong opinion, and down to earth advice. They are trustworthy.

In most cases, our romantic relationships suffer the most from our, trust issues, because of, character.  A person’s, character, prevent them from lying and cheating.  Since, intimate relationships, are based on honesty and openness a partner who has, character, builds trust. This, trust, is the glue that binds the relationship, providing a positive emotional connection that’s rooted in affection, love, and loyalty.

Consistency – Your partner shows, consistency, when they are reliable, and you know that they always have your back. They may not be the expert, but they are reliable, present and available when you need them. They have been with you through highs and lows.

Trust issues, can be a sign that someone has experienced a significant amount of trauma — but that doesn’t mean that they aren’t working through their past experiences and learning, consistency. Trust issues, in a relationship can be hard for both partners to overcome, but with adequate support and communication channels, people with, trust issues, can have healthy, successful connections with partners — that aren’t ruled by their past.

Listen Notes Transform Your Mind
Listen Notes Transform Your Mind

Trust that people come into your life for a reason

These are the four types of trust that make, relationships, flourish.

People come into your life for a reason a season or a lifetime

Some people come into your life for a season bringing change and excitement, but the relationship ends like all seasons do.

Another person might come in for a reason to help you learn and grow or to support you through a difficult time. It feels like they have been sent to guide you through.

And they are lifetime people they stand beside you through thick and thin loving you even when you have nothing to give them.

Love is a gift without any strings attached. Trust love.

Remember you are also a season, reason or lifetime partner to someone else and your role may not match theirs.

Podmust Transform Your Mind podcast
Podmust Transform Your Mind podcast

Trust in Business relationships

Contractual trust, is useful in business.

Mutual trust, comes from a place of goodness.

Pure trust, is when you know that another person has your back.

You develop, trust, by asking for what you want.

Tell them how you want to be loved.

Communicate the areas Where there is dissatisfaction

Build trust by telling your partner what would make you feel loved Thanks for tuning into 5 mins with coach Myrna I want to invite you to join my private Facebook group called life coach so that you can be inspired all week long. Until next time Namaste

Additional Resources

Can You Handle Success Like Chris Rock

How To Develop Trust In Relationships

Coach Myrna 5 min something greater is coming

There are 4 types of, trust, that make, relationships, flourish. These are care, competence, consistency and character. In this episode of 5 mins with coach Myrna, I teach how to develop these areas of, trust, in your, relationships.

Download the Podcast Here: 

https://pdcn.co/e/https://chrt.fm/track/897G7/www.buzzsprout.com/1761155/10143150-how-to-develop-trust-in-relationships.mp3?download=true

Developing Trust with Care

Care – When we care about your partner, we put our emotions in their hands, they, care, about what’s best for you and not what’s best for them. They, care, about your wellbeing.  Examples of, care, are: going beyond the call of duty to help you move, accompany you to a doctor’s appointment etc.

Here are some ways to show you care:

  • Write them a powerful letter full of love and hope.

  • Take care of some of their responsibilities (for example, watch their kids, do their laundry, cook them dinner, or go shopping for them).

  • Call often to remind them how much you love them and how you are always thinking of them.

  • When you visit, bring a book to read aloud or a movie to watch together.

  • Bring them pictures of your times together and hang them where they can be viewed all the time.

  • Spend time reminiscing about the fun times that you’ve shared (as children, in high school or college, or on vacations). Remind him or her that there will be more good times in the future.

Transform Your Mind Podcast Pandora
Transform Your Mind Podcast Pandora

Developing trust through competence

Competence – The second type of, trust, is, competence.  You trust that your partner is competent to handle financial matters. If you are sick, competent, to handle your, care, and make decisions that are best for you and not best for them. You trust their opinions and recommendations.

Romantic competence entails a conscious awareness of both emotional needs and appropriate actions for meeting those needs within a well-functioning, relationship, And because their, relationships, are still fresh, their emotions toward them are likely quite high.

The definition of, competence, is your skill or ability in a specific field or subject, or being able to do something well or to being sane enough to stand trial in court. An example of, competence, is when you can, trust, your partner to make the financial arrangements of the household.

Transform your Mind Podbean
Transform your Mind Podbean

Building Trust through Good Moral Character

Character – When we talk about, trust, we are usually talking about a high moral compass or the, character ,of our partner. We look to these people when we are not sure what is right and follow their lead. These people practice what they preach and are valuable in, interdependent relationships. They have good reputation, strong opinion, and down to earth advice. They are trustworthy.

What are examples of, good moral character?
Legal judgments of, good moral character, can include consideration of honesty, trustworthiness, diligence, reliability, respect for the law, integrity, candor, discretion, observance of fiduciary duty, respect for the rights of others, absence of hatred and racism, fiscal responsibility, mental and emotional stability

Trust develops when we are consistent

Consistency – Your partner shows, consistency, when they are reliable, and you know that they always have your back. They may not be the expert, but they are reliable present and available when you need them. They have been with you through highs and lows.

Someone who is, consistent, always behaves in the same way, has the same attitudes towards people or things, or achieves the same level of success in something. He was never the most, consistent, of players anyway.  If one fact or idea is, consistent, with another, they do not contradict each other.

Consistency, in, relationships,  is a combination of behaviors that include dependability, and a true desire to have a companion and form a serious, relationship. People who are more, consistent, with their interactions with one another, such as having predictable behaviors and good communication, have longer and healthier, relationships.

Transform Your Mind iHeart Radio
iHeart Radio

Why we have relationships

People come into your life for a reason a season or a lifetime.

Some people come into your life for a season bringing change and excitement, but the, relationship, ends like all seasons do.

Another person might come in for a reason to help you learn and grow or to support you through a difficult time. It feels like they have been sent to guide you through.

And they are lifetime people they stand beside you through thick and thin loving you even when you have nothing to give them.

Love is a gift without any strings attached.

Remember you are also a season, reason or lifetime partner to someone else and your role may not match theirs.

Google Podcast Transform Your Mind
Google Podcast Transform Your Mind

Trust is earned

  • Trust is earned.
  • It is central to every relationship.
  • Trust is about intention.

Contractual trust, is useful in business.

Mutual trust, comes from a place of goodness.

Pure trust, is when you know that another person has your back.

You develop, trust, by asking for what you want.

Tell them how you want to be loved.

Communicate the areas where there is dissatisfaction.

Build, trust, by telling your partner what would make you feel loved.

Thanks for tuning into, 5 mins with coach Myrna, I want to invite you to join my private Facebook group called Lifecoach so that you can be inspired all week long.

Until next time Namaste

Additional Resources

The Pursuit of Happiness: The Happiness Habit