Tag Archives: fixed mindset

How To Unlock Your Full Potential: Overcoming the Enemy of Inaction

David Nurse, an NBA Mindset coach and bestselling author, joins host Myrna Young to discuss the importance of a, growth mindset, to, unlock your full potential. We explore eight, archetypes of fear, that hinder action: including the burned, the blamer, and the perfectionist. David shares insights from his book “Do It: The Life-Changing Power of Taking Action” and offers practical tools for overcoming these, archetypes of fear. He emphasizes the need to embrace imperfection and take consistent action to achieve success.

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Unlock your full potential with a growth mindset

Myrna: The common thread in all your books is mindset. Why do you think a, growth mindset, is so important to our success?

David: Having a, growth mindset, is so important because really, when you break down life, it is simple.  Life starts off simple. When you're a kid, you're just playing. You don't have worries, stresses, anxieties.

But as you get older, get into a job, into relationships, everything becomes so complicated. But if you peel back the layers of the onion of life, it actually is very simple. And it just comes down to perspective, how you view each situation. You can't take it all in once. It's just step by step. It's like taking a step forward with a flood lamp where you can only see a little bit in front of you. You can't see the whole picture.

Having a, growth mindset, is a crucial factor in determining our success. It shapes our perspective and how we approach challenges and opportunities.

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How athletes unlock their full potential with mindset growth

Myrna: So as a mindset coach for athletes, before we go into, growth mindset , off the court, let talk about, growth mindset, on the court.  Because we can transition everything in life, whether it's having a, growth mindset, on the court, or having a, growth mindset, in the boardroom. So let's stick with the sports analogy for a while because I never played professional sports. But let's say I'm thinking of a mindset like Michael Jordan.  I know, when he got into the league, he was benched.

Nobody thought he was good, or even Tom Brady, he was a scrawny kid. And actually, now that I started to talk, I'm thinking of all these guys. And I just finished watching the Netflix documentary on  Stephen Curry biography. And of course, that's a perfect one to look at. This scrawny little kid, and everybody is counting him out because he's tiny, he's small, and then he starts playing. And what he said to himself is, I'm just good at these guys. I just need to grow a little more.

So tell us about how that kind of, growth mindset, helps you go from everybody is counting you out to being the top of your game?

Transform Your Mind Amazon
Transform Your Mind Amazon

How Stephen Curry unlocked his full potential and changed the game

David: Yeah, absolutely. And it's so interesting to see these top athletes to ever play their sports. A lot of them were counted out or they were underestimated. And it's actually one of the archetypes in Do It: The Life Changing Power of Taking Action that I talk about, because we are either people who says, Why me? Others say, Why not me? Why can't I be the best at what I'm doing? Why don't I deserve a great life? That's the difference between a, growth mindset vs a fixed mindset. 

So it's great that you brought up Curry, as I give this example in talks and I show this slide about when Steph Curry was coming out of college, his scouting report, and you could Google search this, you'll just start laughing. It said, undersized, not quick enough, probably will be a backup,  he'll be lucky to even play in the NBA. And Curry goes on to transcend the way an entire sport is played, which didn't shoot as many threes until Steph Curry came to the game. He literally took a sport that been going on for years and changed the way it was played. That is, how to overcome self-doubt and unlock your full potential.

Transform Your Mind Podcast Player FM
Transform Your Mind Podcast Player FM

The archetypes of inaction

Myrna: So today we want to talk a bit about the enemy of inaction, which I think is so important. Your book Do It talks about the enemy of inaction. And you said that you've identified eight archetypes that are the enemy of inaction. These archetypes could also be called the, fear of failure. The first one is The Burned.

I'm assuming that you mean that someone burned me, so I'm not going to do anything. Which is the, enemy of progress. Another one is The Blamer, I know that one because even this morning, I was telling my son to stop going around blaming others, it's one of the worst things that you can do.  And then there is The perfectionist. The people with, type A personality. I understand, The Blamer, and, The Perfectionist. Not so much about, The Burned. So talk to us about these eight, archetypes of fear, that are the enemies of inaction.

Transform Your Mind iHeart Radio
iHeart Radio

To overcome the enemy of inaction we must release fear

David: So the, enemy of inaction, is fear. Ultimately, it is, fear of uncertainty. It's fear of failure. We don't take action because we don't know what's on the other side of that action. If you were guaranteed results, you would do that. But it's uncertain. So there's actually eight, archetypes of fear, that I outlined, those are just the top three. I'll just go through the eight.

If you're struggling, if you're held back, if you're stuck, you can understand why and be able to break through that and take action. So the archetypes are the allodoxaphobia, which is just a cool way to say, fear of other people's opinions.

The following archetypes are the enemy of inaction. We need to recognize them to, unlock our full potential.

Book Do it
Book Do it
The archetypes of inaction
  1. The Burned archetype refers to individuals who have been hurt or disappointed in the past and are afraid to take action again. They may have experienced failure or rejection, and this has created a, fear of failure. If you are going to, unlock your full potential, you need to start  addressing this by separating the past from the present and adopting a reverse alter ego. By giving the past a silly name, we can distance ourselves from the negative experiences and move forward with a fresh perspective.

2. The Blamer archetype is characterized by individuals who constantly blame others for their current situation.  We can never, unlock our full potential, if we refuse to take responsibility for our actions and believe that external factors are the cause of their lack of progress. I emphasize the importance of personal accountability and encourages individuals to take ownership of their choices and outcomes.

3. The Perfectionist archetype is driven by the need for everything to be perfect.  Type A personalities, fall into to, the perfectionist archetype. These individuals set impossibly high standards for themselves and are often paralyzed by the, fear of failure.  You can never, unlock your full potential, if you have a, fear of failure. I advise my clients to embrace the, 90% theory, which allows for imperfection and acknowledges that nothing will ever be perfect. By focusing on giving 90% effort and accepting that mistakes are part of the learning process, individuals can overcome the, perfectionist mindset, and take action.

The other archetypes of inaction

4. The Believer archetype, organize their lives around their belief systems. When asked why they believe in a certain way, many Believers will simply reply, “Because it’s true.” They have their own way of coming to conclusions and these ways often defy reason and/or are difficult to convey because they are based on a feeling.is kind of interesting.  Check out, the Believer Archetype, on  Myers Briggs .

5. The Inopportune archetype , which means you think you're either too old or too young. Timing is just not right. Tjis becomes the reason for inaction.

6.  The introvert  believes he is introverted, so he can't go out and talk to people.  Introverted or extroverted has nothing to do with whether you talk to people or not? It's just how you recharge. Do you recharge by yourself or do you recharge with others?

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7. The scarcity archetype, where you have a, scarcity mindset. There's only one slice of the pie that you feel like you just have to hold on to all you got and you can't share anything with anybody else, because if you do, it's all going to be gone.

8. The distracted archetype, and I don't even mean by distracted of like our phones or the notifications or all these things that we have of being constantly on in this world that we live in. But even more the distraction of not knowing what your vision, your mission, your purpose is. And that's your, enemy of inaction.  The enemy of, unlocking your potential.

Conclusion

In conclusion, unlocking our full potential, requires a shift in mindset. We must, overcome the enemy of inaction, which is often fueled by fear and negative thought patterns. By addressing the burned, blamer, and perfectionist archetypes, we can break free from these limiting beliefs and take action towards our goals. Remember, the mind is a powerful tool, and by harnessing its potential, we can transform our lives and achieve greatness.

Additional Resources

https://blog.myhelps.us/shamelessly-persistent-keep-knocking-until-door-opened/

 

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How to Stop Self Sabotaging Behaviors

Self sabotaging behaviors, move us in the opposite direction from our goals. When we understand the patterns that underlie, self sabotage, we begin to free ourselves.

We then begin to allow ourselves to interact with ourselves and the world with greater success, joy, and fulfillment. The process of breaking through denial, facing your fear, anger, and other difficult emotions, and making peace with your pain, leads to an ending of the internal war with yourself.

You can step fully into the greatest expression of yourself. Finding the wisdom inside the wounds you've endured is one of the most important conversations you'll ever have with yourself about, self sabotage, because on the other side of it is the emotional freedom and depth of joy that you were born to have.

Introduction to, Self Sabotaging Behaviors

In this interview Sabrina Johnson, inspirational Speaker and Author,  talks on how she overcame different aspects of, self sabotaging behaviors, because of her lack of self confidence and negative self talk. Overcoming, Self Sabotage, and taking Inventory of your failures is one way to stop, self defeating behavior.

Whatever form it takes – whether, self sabotaging behaviors, or limiting thought patterns; self sabotage,  always diminishes the passion and energy we need to fulfill our dreams. At the heart of the matter, it is possible to create as much love, fulfillment, success and joy as we feel worthy of having. By identifying how your inner saboteur is, self sabotaging,  your life, you can make radical progress toward that which you want.

Podbean Transform your Mind Podcast

Podbean 

Overcoming, Self Defeating,  behavior by changing your Mindset

Mindsets are beliefs – beliefs about yourself and your most basic qualities.

Think about your intelligence, your talents, your personality. Are these qualities simply fixed traits, carved in stone or can you cultivate and grow these traits?

Your intelligence is not a fixed quantity which cannot be increased. With practice, training, and above all method, we can increase our attention, our memory, our judgment and become more intelligent than we were before.

In a, Fixed Mindset, people believe their basic qualities, like their intelligence or talent, are simply fixed traits thus the, self defeating, behavior

In a Growth Mindset, people believe that their most basic abilities can be developed through dedication and hard work.

The, Fixed Mindset, is a, Defeated Mindset

The, fixed mindset, creates an internal dialogue that is focused on judging. e.g

  • “I am a loser”
  • “I am the giver in this relationship and I get nothing in return”
  • “I am a no good husband”
  • “My partner is selfish only thinks about himself”

People with a, growth mindset,  are sensitive to positive and negative information; but they're attuned to its implications for learning and growing. They ask themselves “What can I learn from this” How can I improve “How can I help my partner do better.

Self sabotage
Self sabotage

How to Overcome, Self Sabotage, at Work

I have always been someone who spent years trying to move my life forward I always say that I am a dreamer;  but the problem was I made decisions and choices in my life that counteracted that data.  I told myself I wanted to move forward; but everything that I did was, self sabotage, my behavior caused me to move backwards.

If I stopped and did an honest self-assessment and really seek God for direction on what am I needed to do. I would figure out  why  I was  seemingly repeating the same, self sabotaging, cycles in my life.  It was at that point that I began to really recognize certain, defeated mindsets, or negative truth about myself that I held  about myself subconsciously that was preventing me from moving forward and continuing these, self defeating behaviors.

For instance I'll give you an example. I am very career-driven, so I desire to move up the career ladder.  I have a master's degree in marketing;  but whenever I went to apply for a director level or VP level positions, I get intimidated and, self sabotage, by talking myself out of applying for that position. I would apply and start working at a lower position and then the next couple of months I'm miserable.

Inevitably my employer would see in me what I couldn't see in myself and they would give me more responsibility. Then I would complain about being overworked and underpaid.  My, defeated mindset, would make me, self sabotage, and take a lower position than I was qualified for.  Then I would leave these jobs because it wasn't what I wanted and then the cycle would begin all over again at another company.

I had to say OK God I need your help.  Give me the courage to jump in even though I felt fear.

Transform your Mind TuneIn Radio
TuneIn Radio

What is a, Defeated Mindset

Myrna: Let me not skip over this huge opportunity to ask you Sabrina. Since you've done whole bunch of self-assessments,  why did you have a, defeated mindset, and, self sabotage,  yourself all those years?  Why did you not have confidence in your abilities?

Sabrina: That is a great question Myrna,  and that was something I had to really pinpoint.  I was listening to a speaker and he said when you lack self-confidence, somewhere along the line in your life someone fed into your mind that you were not good enough. That you were not worthy enough.  I started looking back on past unhealthy relationships and past hurts and start to really connect the guys who rejected me.  Hurts from past relationships.

I had to rely on my faith and ask God for guidance. Outside of that I read a lot of self-help books and articles on how to overcome a, defeated mindset,  how to build your confidence and how to speak with confidence;  but a lot of it, the core of it really has to go back to the words that I was speaking to myself.  So when I started to get intimidated by the Job description, I would remind myself that I have done this job in the past.  You're not going to take a different role in the company then do this job and not get paid for it. I started being my own cheerleader.

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Transform your Mind Stitcher
Transform your Mind Stitcher

Here are 4 steps to Overcome, Self Sabotage 

  1. Become aware of your emotions. Your emotions are the language of your body.
  2. Change your emotions by thinking of want you want. Eg. You have applied for a promotion 2 times now and you keep being passed over. A, defeated mindset, says I am never going to get this job I had better get used to this and begin to, self sabotage, Instead imagine yourself in this new position. Feel in your body how it would feel to sit at that desk with your name on the door.
  3. Your emotions will change and so will your body. It believes it is living in the future now.
  4. That’s the way to get over, self sabotaging behavior. Change your brain to change your life.
Transform Your Mind iHeart Radio
iHeart Radio

 Additional Resources on Overcoming, Self Sabotage, 

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/beyond-self-destructive-behavior/201512/understanding-self-destructive-dysregulated-behaviors

https://lonerwolf.com/self-destructive-person/

A Guide to Changing Self-Destructive Behaviors

 

http://blog.myhelps.us/how-does-emotional-intelligence-affect-your-success/

http://blog.myhelps.us/5-mindset-transformations-permanent-relationships/