Author Traci Thomas offers, reflection on her, abandonment by her mother in her book, Reflection 4 Rejection. Traci answers the question “Is child, abandonment, rejection by the natural mother?” If so how does this rejection affect the child’s self worth and self esteem for the rest of their life.
In her book “Reflection 4 Rejection ” —Surviving A Mother’s Abandonment And Abuse.” Traci Thomas shares her story and how she got to the other side.
Here is Traci’s story:
On, reflection, I feel that, rejection, by your natural mother, it’s such a unique, unusual, weird, inhumane space to be. It nonetheless served such a great purpose in my life, and what I mean by that is the following. It’s one of those preambles whereas once you have survived this type of, rejection, you pretty much can walk on water, and I mean that literally and figuratively. It’s one of those scenarios and situations very few people ever experience or understand. When you suffer from, abandonment, you’re in your own community and it’s isolating; but yet you’re so powerful at the same time.
With that being said once you overcome this, abandonment, and it is a challenge, it’s a lot to muddle through. However, once you get through it, and you’re on the other side, there’s nothing you can’t do. So in my situation, it’s like a head of bipartisan. I had two scenarios, two lives coexisting at one time. I had a father who had full custody of me at three years old. That’s when my natural, mother, and my dad were divorced back in 1968. I was born in 1965, that was unheard of within the United States. Very few fathers gained custody of their children or their child, so that in itself is a profound statement. That also shows you how little fight my natural, mother, put up to keep me.
I do remember one particular time my, mother, did quote, unquote kidnap me. She did take me when I got off the school bus when I was in kindergarten, and she took me to Philadelphia and thank God my father and the FBI came and rescued me. But even when she’s so-called put forth some effort, to show that she wanted me, it was still a situation where I was locked up in a room, there were German Shepherds downstairs and the FBI had to come and get me. She never really exemplified that she wanted me; but that’s okay and that’s what I explained in the book. It’s perfectly okay, because I define what, abandonment, is. It’s a supernatural definition. I actually give you, hind sights, definitions, elaborations and explanations as to what’s going on. What’s happening, why your natural, mother, abandoned, you. It took me 50 years to figure it out, which is sad, but at least I figured it out.
My tax lady Miami.com wants to help you Get your Stimulus Check!
The IRS has released their new Web Tool to update your info in their systems for your stimulus payment :
If you have already filed your return, you don’t need to do anything.
If you didn’t file yet, download the My Tax Lady Miami App NOW and let’s get your refund AND your Stimulus Payment.
If you know someone who doesn’t usually have to file a tax return (the elderly, disabled and/or very low income individuals) and wants to receive their stimulus payment, send them this link or visit https://mytaxladymiami.com/ contact My tax lady Miami to file a simple return ASAP.
Follow us on all social media platforms @Mytaxladymiami
What does, Abandonment Issues, Mean?
Wikipedia says that, abandonment issues, causes Abandoned child Syndrome.
- Abandoned child syndrome is a proposed behavioral or psychological condition that results primarily from the loss of one or both parents or sexual abuse.
- Abandonment issues, may stem from physical (the parent is not present in the child’s life) or emotional (the parent withholds affection, nurturing, or stimulation). The abandoned child syndrome is not recognized as a mental illness.
- Mothers, who leave their children, or when a parent is alienated from their children by the other parent (after a bitter divorce, DCHS, or foster care), can cause psychological damage to the child. This damage is reversible, but only with appropriate assistance. Abandoned children may also often suffer physical damage from, rejection, malnutrition, starvation, and abuse.
Ladies, if you’re looking for premium luxury hair extensions and products, take a moment and check out myminghair.com. MING HAIR is your #1 premium virgin hair company for quality Indian and Brazilian hair, lace wigs, magnetic lashes and custom hair & beauty accessories! We want you to look and feel your best, so we offer a wide array of styles, lengths, custom colors, bundle deals and much more!
We believe in customer satisfaction which is why you earn rewards on every purchase! You will not be disappointed. Our hair is bouncy, luxurious, long-lasting, and stylish!
Visit myminghair.com today and receive 20 percent off your first order and get exclusive access to other promotions. We look forward to making you a long-lasting customer with MING HAIR.
I want to comment on something you said that’s a little different from my normal association with, abandonment, you said it took you about 50 years to get to the other side and it was very isolating; but once you got to the other side you felt like you could walk on water. Which is a very positive spin on, abandonment, because if you were to take a survey of the, child abandonment, community you will find that most kids end up having a lot of self-esteem issues, they don’t think they’re good enough.
When you feel, abandoned, it’s not your imagination. When you make every effort imaginable to connect or contact your natural mother and every single attempt, every single effort, every single expendable energy that you put forth, the end result is just this repellent. It’s this, rejection, of your natural, mother, not wanting you or your natural, mother, treating you as if you’re a bill collector. Your natural, mother, is literally tolerating you and can’t wait to get you off the phone. When you’re in a scenario like that again and again, it’s so bizarre.
Podcast interview Questions: Reflection, 4, Rejection
What was your Objective in writing “Reflection 4 Rejection ” —Surviving A Mother’s , Abandonment, And Abuse.?
On, reflection, once you’ve been in a situation where you’ve made every effort and did somersaults, headstands, back-flips, anything you can think of to connect with your natural mother, and every single attempt is unproductive and counterproductive. It’s toxic, and it’s unhealthy, because of the way that you feel afterwards. You literally feel as if you’ve been punched in the stomach with every single attempt to get the love of your, mother.
You’re in tears and you’re shaking, and you have anxiety, and then you go through life thinking that you’ve got to kiss every behind in the universe. You have this feeling of inadequacy this feeling of I’m not good enough, there’s something wrong with me. That’s why I wrote the book, because I do not want another human being going through five decades of what I went through. That’s why I engineered and composed the book.
My objective in writing the book, is for someone to have an open mind and instead of going through life telling themselves, my own, mother, didn’t want me. Even though that is true, instead they can tell themselves that they have every right and privilege to not want her either.
Power is something you take, nobody gives you power. You snatch power.
So what I wish to do with this work, with this writing, is to allow an individual to look at being, abandoned, in hindsight. Let’s really look at it and put an autopsy and microscope on, abandonment, for a second. If you really do this it’s not hard at all, you won’t have to go through all these dog and pony shows and tail spins. Kissing this one’s tail, and doing back flips for this person, and making your, mother, love you, trying to buy this person, begging for love, please love me, please like me. You don’t have to go through all of those mental gymnastics. It’s not necessary. I’m trying to save somebody 50 years.
Abandonment, from Relationships
Can this scenario be also transferred to people who are, rejected, period? I mean because, rejection, and being, abandoned, are not only synonymous with, mothers, or parents. Men can reject you, your friends can reject you, jobs can fire you. Is this information transferable?
I placed a laser focus on this particular relationship between a child and a natural, mother. This ironically is not, rejection, and if you read the book you’ll totally comprehend what I’m speaking about. The natural, mother, is not rejecting you, the natural, mother, is rejecting the reminder of neglecting you. The natural, mother, doesn’t even know you. How can somebody reject you when they don’t even know you? That makes absolutely no sense.
I’ve seen that the trauma that it is caused in young lives and almost every aspect of being , abandoned, or, rejection. So it’s kind of good to tell yourself that your natural, mother, didn’t reject you because she doesn’t know you. If you actually do believe that I can understand that it is easier to get to the other side. That’s good, I like that spin.
Canisbeverages.com is family owned small business that specializes in promoting a healthy lifestyle.
Our flagship product is the hibiscus tea. The tea comes in various flavors including Cinnamon, Strawberry, Pineapple, Classic and Mango.
Hibiscus tea is packed with antioxidants, and it helps with regulating blood pressure , lowers blood fat levels, and also help fight bacteria. In this age of the Coronavirus, have a sip of tea loaded with antioxidants to promote a healthy body.
Visit us today at www.canisbeverages.com
Canisbeverages you are what you drink !
What is the main message of your book Reflection for Rejection?
I wrote the book to give some insight to, child abandonment.
What message would you give to that listener of why they should go out and buy the book?
It would be in their best interest even if they don’t get the book, if they just listened to the podcast, because it summarizes the book. It’s their prerogative if they wish to purchase it or not. I mean that’s their choice; but with that being said.
Don’t ever allow another person, place or thing to define your self-worth. Don’t do that. Don’t ever give someone that opportunity or luxury.
I know you talked about your natural mother not really rejecting you because she didn’t know you; but did you touch on psychologically what was happening to her for her to have that unnatural response to her biological daughter?
My father, God bless his soul, was extremely intimidating. He was a very wealthy, powerful, articulate, worldly man. He traveled a lot because he was a computer programmer, so he was extremely I guess very controlling. So I give my, mother, an inkling of understanding, because he was pretty much a womanizer.
I’m not giving her a full 24-hour pass, but I am giving her an hour pass. I can’t really give her a full 24-hour pass, because there are, mothers, who have gone through the same episode and they didn’t react that way.
This space explorer figurine will jumpstart AR for space careers and fight student debt
Were you exposed to your career or did you discover it by trial and error?
Are you or were you 1 out of 6 people who carry a chunk of the ~$1.5 trillion in outstanding student debt?
The craziest part is, 1/3 of those people are not even working in the same field as their degree. So how do we fix the problem?
Career Discovery has come up with a way to use augmented reality for enhanced career education, letting young people learn more about some of the most exciting, in-demand careers in the world while improving their ability to select a degree that they will actually use.
Most interesting? We’ve decided to start with space industry jobs, which means you can back our project on Kickstarter and learn a lot about a subject you find fascinating!
Our current Space career discovery modules include interviews with some of the Space industry’s leaders and prominent entrepreneurs and professionals. Plus, you’ll get fundamental exposure to core knowledge as well as quizzes and challenges designed to help students think about Space in a professional way.
We will eventually expand this to many other industries in Science, Technology, Engineering, Gaming, and many more.
One of the most exciting pieces about our pilot Space program is the AR-enabled 3D-printed collectible space explorer figurine we are giving to Kickstarter backers at a much discounted rate.
This futuristic, highly detailed blue, grey, white and black space explorer is scannable and activates the Space modules in our Augmented Reality app.
Check out this game changing space explorer on our campaign page https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/careerdiscovery/career-discovery-space
In this season of the Coronavirus pandemic masks can save lives. There is a worldwide shortage of masks. I saw health care workers making there own.
Chinasbags.com has lots of disposable face masks available for sale for immediate delivery.
Check out their N95 Mouth Mask protects against Dust, Pollution, and germs
Their Military Grade Washable Cotton Masks the KN95 Masks With Activated Carbon Filter Is a Breathable Mask for Germ Protection.
Head over to Chinasbag.com to order now wholesale quantities also available that’s Chinasbag.com and stay protected during this pandemic
Are You Angry at your mom for her Abuse and, Abandonment?
- One of the things that I noticed talking with you Traci is that I see no evidence of PTSD from being, abandoned, by your, mother. Post traumatic stress disorder in teenage girls, usually develops for girls who have been sexually abused, neglected, or abandoned. You said that every time you tried it to communicate with your mom, or tried to make her love you, or tried to form a relationship; you felt like you got punched in the stomach. At those times were you ever angry?
What’s so interesting is that I got angry at the end. Like right in the last year. My book goes in chronological order. In the book, I actually highlight the events that have occurred during the last five decades, and what’s so flabbergasting to me is that I didn’t get angry and livid until the very end. I wasn’t angry at her, I was angry at me for participating. I was so livid at myself for wasting so much time, that it took me decades to come down from the humiliation, the frustration, the hurt, the pain, the disappointment, the monotony, and the redundancy.
Getting to the other side, puts you in a disposition where you’re at total complete peace. I call it a, mother, transplant because once you realize why she acts the way she does, once that clicks in your brain, a light bulb goes off and you’re free.
Do you need a loan or rent an apartment but you don’t have a credit score? Do you have a credit score but it is low? I would like to tell you about an amazing free service offered by Kikoff, K-I-K-O-F-F. They build credit for free. No interest, no fee, no credit pull, no bank account or credit card required. Their customers who had zero credit were able to get a 600+ credit score in 30 days. Kikoff is an official member of all three major consumer credit bureaus and will establish your credit history with all of them. It is a mission-driven company backed by social impact investors. Credit building should be free and now it is. Build your credit and receive free credit scores at Kikoff’s website today! That’s kickoff without the “c”, so k-i-k-o-f-f dot com
How did you handle Rejection and Reflection?
When you read the book you’ll completely understand what’s going on and it has absolutely nothing to do with you.
Your, mother, didn’t reject you, she can’t reject you because she doesn’t know you.
Yes, I understand what you’re saying. After you become immune to the, rejection, and you get on the other side of, abandonment, when you get to the other side, you feel empowered like you can walk on water. Nobody else has the capability of hurting you.
Childhood trauma and, abandonment, affects children in many ways.
Childhood trauma, #1
1. Addictions – as a child, did your parents have any addiction?
Now we typically think of drugs and alcohol, but there’s also sex addiction.
If your parent was a cheater or watched porn, have an eating addiction, was a hoarder,
spending or gambling, workaholics etc. There’s 11 addictive behaviors.
Childhood trauma, #2
2. Verbal abuse – Did you witness your mom and dad screaming and
yelling at each other? The typical is yelling screaming but
this also includes no verbal alkaloids, no compliments, not hearing I love you
verbally humiliated, or put down, your opinion means nothing, or statements like
“you’ll never amount to anything.” Comments like that.
Childhood trauma, #3
3. Emotional abuse or Neglect – Your parents were not around, being gone for
long periods of time. Research also shows latch key kids let’s say they
came home from school at 3 o’clock and mom if they’re in a single household mom
had to work 9 to 5. That child is alone for two or so hours. There’s anxiety around that.
So that even falls under the neglect believe it or not. While we’re out trying to support our
kids there home alone.
Childhood trauma, #4
4. Physical Abuse, Rape or Molestation – The rape or Molestation could have happened
in or outside of the home. Physical abuse is being beat hit in any way other than
the typical spanking like a quick spank on the butt. Research shows that spanking does nothing to help teach your child anything, so I always say when I do parenting lectures in the schools
we’re supposed to teach our child another way. If you’re beating them or hitting them you’re teaching them to be violent back. We don’t want to do that.
Childhood trauma, #5
5. Abandonment – There’s two types, childhood trauma from, abandonment. Fault and No Fault, abandonment.
Here are three examples of no-fault, abandonment.
• a parent has to go off and serve at war
• a parent happens to die early
• early a parent travels away from the home a lot for work. 20:24
Here is an example of “Fault”, abandonment:
• Divorce and the mom or dad leaves the home
and is supposed to see the children every weekend and is either late or
cancels, does not pick up the child. The dad is spending more time with his new
girlfriend than he is paying attention to you the child.
Childhood trauma, #6
6. Adoption – if you were adopted, part of the foster care system, or you needed to
live with relatives because mom or dad couldn’t take care of you, that even
includes Grandma’s, aunts or uncles. I had a client who signed up with me she
asks “How about if we chose to live with another family because we didn’t
want to go home? I said yes that falls under this category because there was
always yelling and screaming in her household so she didn’t want to go home.
Childhood trauma, #7
7. Personal trauma – This comes from being bullied, feeling different not
fitting in, being a little overweight as a child or like me skinny and gawky.
Many people remember being bullying not part of the sports teams.
Childhood trauma, #8
8. Sibling trauma – Your sibling could have been born with a
medical issue where it demanded more of moms and dads time.
Or they could be bullying you, but most often this one applies to if you
perceive your sibling as being the golden child. They were more athletically beautiful
or handsome or intelligent getting better grades and mom or dad gushed over
them versus you. You were always trying to prove yourself and say see I’m
Childhood trauma, #9
9. Community trauma – If a parent was incarcerated, if you moved
a lot like military families. In the U.S.A military families move every two to four years.
Growing up in lack, growing up in dangerous neighborhoods, that’s all
family trauma and community trauma.
Today we have active volcanoes, massive fire, floods, hurricanes, mass
Childhood trauma, #10
10. Mental Health – Bipolar, Manic Depression, Hidden personalities.
We have Sociopaths and narcissism is part of community trauma.
Sociopathic means that they have no regard for your emotional feelings, they
act on what they want, when they want without thinking about their partner or
Two examples of sociopaths are Steve Jobs and Tiger woods.
Want access to learning tools that will help you improve your life? Visit www.loyaldetermined.com! Loyal Determined offers online dating courses for both women and men which are easy to follow and will help you improve your existing relationship or assist you in making your next relationship succeed. Loyal Determined also offers online math courses for students who want to sharpen their skills in courses like Algebra and Algebra 2 in an engaging and effective way. Loyal Determined is constantly offering awesome new online courses to help you improve your life so be sure to check their website frequently. Visit www.loyaldetermined.com today!
Having computer problems let Kaymiah Remote Repair get your PC or Mac issues resolved. We specialize in quick and reliable remote repair services. We can log on remotely and get your computer back up and running or fix any issue you have in no time and we are available 24/7.
Visit us online at https://kaymiahinc.com/remote all us today at 409-444-3012
Uninvolved parenting, sometimes referred to as neglectful parenting, is a style characterized by a lack of responsiveness to a child’s needs. Uninvolved parents make few to no demands of their children and they are often indifferent, dismissive, or even completely neglectful.
Child abuse happens when a parent or care giver of a minor child allows, inflicts or permits physical or sexual abuse or allows a situation where there is a risk of physical injury. Child neglect means a minor child lacks adequate care and is danger of physical or psychological harm.