How to Stop Negative Self Talk

July 2, 2021September 26, 2021

How to Stop Negative Self Talk

Most of the time our, self-communication, is negative. Our, negative self-talk, is different from the way we talk to our friends for example. So we need to tell ourselves “I don’t like the way you talk to me”

My guest today all the way from the UK is Cheyne Towers. Cheyne is a hypnotherapist and, self-communication, expert and we are going to be talking today on, negative self-talk, and, mindfulness.

Listen to the full interview here:

Cheyne Towers. London-based hypnotherapist Cheyne Towers has been helping people to transform how they speak toward themselves for the best part of two decades. Through simple yet profound understanding he has successfully helped many who have suffered trauma, abuse, depression, and anxiety. Now the co-founder of The Dialogue of Self Liberation, Cheyne is sharing this practical transformational system online, helping people to develop The Mindfulness of Self-Communication, and nurture self-forgiveness and self-compassion. Always willing to connect Cheyne can regularly be found hosting the TDSL Global Community Calls, where he provides continuing support to people around the world who wish to improve and enhance the quality of their self-communications. As a lifelong martial artist, Cheyne has also developed seated Qigong for people with mobility challenges, and also teaches workshops at Sword Punk traditional weapons-training festival in the UK.

Does being a martial artist help with self communication?

Myrna – You are a martial artist and a, self-communication, expert. Martial art is a very controlled sport, so it lends to having control of your, mind. Can you share your journey from martial art to, mindfulness? You mentioned that you’re helping people who have suffered, trauma, or, abuse, and depression.

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Cheyne – From an early age, I had an interest in, inner development, self-development, meditation, and those kinds of practices. I started practicing martial art around 17 years old. I’m currently 55 years old and that’s been a constant throughout my life.

I never wanted to become a therapist, but through mutual friends, I was introduced to it by a very experienced, hypnotherapist. I studied with him as his personal student for the last four years of his life and during that time he took me through a process that totally transformed my life on every level for the better.

How I let go of my Negative Self-talk and repetitive patterns

Unbeknown to me, I’d spent 20 years of my life engaging in very, negative repetitive patterns of, self-talk, giving myself a very hard time, beating myself up, blaming myself for not being good enough, for having been a failure in relationships and many other things.

I didn’t realize that I was doing it. I hadn’t got a clue and he helped me in a very clear and methodical way to identify those unhelpful habits and, negative beliefs, that I’d picked up along the way about myself.

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Myrna – Did he put you under under, hypnotherapy, or did he just talk to you?

Cheyne – He used the methodology of developing the, mindfulness, of, self-communication. The very first thing he had me do was to develop the skill of monitoring the dialogue I was speaking to myself. Moment to moment what are you actually saying to yourself, about yourself now in this moment is very important to stopping, negative self-talk.

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How to Listen to your Self-talk

You need to develop the skill of listening to what you’re actually telling yourself and your, negative self-talk, from moment to moment. I bet you will discover that you don’t like the way you speak to yourself.

What are the stories you picked up along the way that no longer serve you? There’s a responsibility that we have toward ourselves, with regards to, how we speak to ourselves about ourselves. We program ourselves through our, self-communications, but then we begin to utilize the more creative aspects of the imagination which is more the formal.

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Hypnosis, or, self-hypnosis, is sometimes necessary to stop the, negative self-talk. Let’s say somebody can’t stop the, negative self-talk, about themselves because all their life they were hearing things like:

you’re not good enough.
you’ll never be nothing.
you will never amount to anything.
You will never be a success in life.

Myrna – Now they’re mindful of it because they’re listening. Can they stop without, hypnotherapy?

Can we stop the negative self-talk without Hypnotherapy?

Cheyne – I don’t like the term, hypnotherapy, or, hypnotherapist, because I think it’s a loaded term and people have many misconceptions about what, hypnotherapy, actually is. So I tend to describe that aspect of the work as I help people to harness the creative power of their imagination, so that they learn how to work with it, rather than be a slave to it.

Myrna – Hypnotherapy, migrates and it changes, so now you’re using the term, creative imagination. How did the martial arts piece fit in to your, negative self-talk?

Cheyne – That’s a great question. I use a lot of metaphors and symbolism in this work because the metaphors and symbols convey things to the, subconscious mind. Which is where we need to make the alterations in the trigger mechanisms that are built up because of our experiences.

There’s a saying a very old Chinese saying the mind leads the chi

This is true of everything in life. If we fixate our thinking in a particular way, if we imagine a particular scenario that is what we attract into our lives. The mind leads the Chi!

When we think about those negative imaginings, our energy, our Chi, gets poured into those molds and we kind of become that shape.

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Negative self-talk – I am not good enough

Myrna – I’m a, Life coach, I know that I’m not good enough is one of the top, negative self-talk, or, self-communication, that we partake of.

Cheyne – True, we torment ourselves and beat ourselves up and come up with all kinds of cruel variations on that theme. We would never dream of speaking to another person the way we speak to ourselves. I Don’t Like the Way You Speak to Me.

We would never dream of putting another person down and yet somehow, we’ve become conditioned to believe that it’s somehow okay for us to talk to ourselves like that.

I’m going to title this “I don’t like the way you speak to me” because we don’t say nice things to ourselves. It is always, negative self-talk. We never say things like:

you’re so pretty.
you’re so beautiful.
you are going to kick ass in this job.
I am good enough for this promotion.

No, the, self-communication, is always negative.

Cheyne – I did that for 20 years of my life totally unconsciously until my teacher helped me to to spot it.

Self-liberation is a program to help us with, negative self-talk

Myrna – That’s amazing, so he pointed you to your purpose. That helped you create the, self-liberation, program. Tell us about it.

Cheyne – The dialogue of, self-liberation, is the name that I’ve given to the methodology of understanding the principles of, negative self-talk. I also call it the “rinse and repeat.”

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People have come to see me in all states of, brokenness. I’ve worked with many people who’ve been raped, who’ve had experience of, sexual abuse, violent, abusive relationships, all kinds of, trauma.

Yet when it’s explained clearly to a person that there is a way for them to begin to change literally the stories, they’re telling themselves about themselves.

Just because we’ve had certain experiences in our past, those experiences don’t need to define who we are today. What defines who we are, is what we do with the experiences we’ve been through.

How do we process those experiences? We can learn from those experiences and choose to no longer communicate about the past as if it were the present or the future. We can chose to stop the, negative self-talk.

Self-liberation is a freeing experience

This is an incredibly freeing and liberating experience, so the dialogue of, self-liberation, is process of learning how to communicate toward ourselves. In a way that has nothing to do with, positive affirmation, nothing to do with fake positivity or anything like that. It allows us to stop communicating to ourselves in, self-abusive, self-limiting, self-pitying, ways in the present tense and the future tense.

Myrna – I’m listening very intently to what you’re saying, because someone who’s reading this wouldn’t understand the depth of what you’re saying. What you’re saying is someone who has been, broken, they’re a victim, someone has done something to them and yet the, negative self-talk, that they’re telling themselves is saying that because of this, you are nobody. Because of this you’re not worth anything.

I was in this same situation for a long time myself, I didn’t get out of it until I was in my 40s. I was, sexually abused, as a child and I carried shame with that. I experienced that, self-liberation, myself once I started talking about it. Now I don’t have any shame attached to it because I was a victim, I was a child. A child can’t give consent to anything.

What does, self-liberation, look like on the other side of shame?

Cheyne – Guilt and shame are really common themes in, trauma. We all commonly normalize the behavior and then end up blaming ourselves. We communicate to ourselves, well I must have deserved it for some reason or another.

When we uncover what we’ve actually been communicating toward ourselves, then we can utilize the use of the, creative imagination, to change the dialogue. We have online programs that we have via the website that we’re teaching the dialogue of, self-liberation. We have various audio materials, some of those are what we refer to as guided contemplations.

These are spoken voice exercises to encourage the person to speak out loud with their own voice in an unconditionally open, self-supportive, and non-limiting way. We have these suggested spoken voice exercises we call guided contemplations plus audio exercises of guided visualizations. The guided visualizations are designed to help people to take old memories of experiences that were upsetting or traumatic or just incredibly challenging and then to use their, creative imagination, to begin to change how they choose to view the memory.

Myrna – One of my most favorite quotes from Dr Wayne Dwyer

Change the way you look at a thing and the thing you look at will change

All we have to do the work. I love Byron Katie, she has a book called “The Work. Change does not come without us doing the work!

We have to do the work to replace our negative self-talk

If you don’t do the work, you will continue to be with your bottom feeder emotions. The guilt, the shame, the anger, the blame. You will play the blame game. I’m not going to do well in life, because my parents abused me, or somebody abused me. In my book “Out of the Snares, a story of Hope and Encouragement” I call this stop being a victim and become a player. When we are in the, game of life, and we get bad cards, we have to learn how to play to win with those cards.

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Tell our readers how they can get more information on your work.

Cheyne – thank you very much Myrna, my website is www.learntdsl.com.

TDSL means the dialogue of, self-liberation.

We have an audio program which is in the form of an app which you would download to your phone with five audio lessons with accompanying audio exercises in the form of guided contemplations.

We also have a live program which consists of drip-fed PDF material over a five-week course with accompanying audio exercises plus one live zoom call with a small group of people once a week at the same time each week for five weeks. We’ve been running this with people around the world now for the last year and we’ve had some just wonderful feedback from the participants.

Conclusion

I want to thank you guys for tuning in to the Transform Your Mind to Transform Your Life Radio Podcast and television show. Please leave a review on iTunes and give us a rating if you liked this blog and podcast.

If you are listening on Spotify or any of the other podcast players, please subscribe and turn on your notification so you can be notified of new episodes.

I also want to invite you to join my private Facebook group called Life coach, we have daily inspiration in this group to help you to, transform your life, by, transforming your mind.

Additional Resources

https://www.findcourses.com/search/emotional-intelligence-training

Life Leadership & Success

March 16, 2021March 22, 2021

Dealing with Anxiety Disorder after Addiction

Addiction and recovery side effects can include, anxiety disorder, and panic attacks. In this episode Dr Tra Ahia, Psychologist offers treatment options for dealing with, anxiety disorder.

I was listening to a podcast last week and the guest was talking about her, anxiety disorder, and her story triggered a memory of a personal acquaintance who was a heroin addict and developed, anxiety disorder.

My first introduction to Anxiety Disorder

In the late 80’s I was working in sales and my boss’s daughter was an, Heroin addict. We were close enough that she would tell me what it was like being addicted to Heroin. She told me how she would cook the heroin until it became a liquid and then she would shoot it into her neck because she got a more immediate high. She showed me the holes in her neck which she covered up with scarves. Her father who was wealthy gave her a car and she sold that car for peanuts to get money to buy Heroin.

She attempted to go to rehab several times; but always walked out because she said they just left you in a room to scream in pain. She said the pain of withdrawal was unbearable. She then started a methadone treatment which is a synthetic version of Heroin. They reduced the dose of the methadone gradually to wean your body off Heroin. But what I want to get to was her, anxiety disorder. She got such bad, panic attacks, her gut was always in knots, that she couldn’t leave the house without her safe person, her boyfriend. I don’t remember if he used drugs; but when the relationship ended she was unable to leave to leave the house for weeks, not even to buy groceries. Then she was too anxious to start dating. She stressed about some man asking “Can I touch your boobs” I don’t know what became of her; but I think of her often.

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What happens to the brain with Anxiety Disorder

If you have an, anxiety disorder – Your brain raises ahead to predict the future. The guest on the podcast had, anxiety disorder, and she described it as “life fright” or , agoraphobia, She said to think about Stage fright. You feel nervous, you think you are going to freeze up or faint, you start to sweat, you think people are going to laugh at you etc. well people with, anxiety disorder, or, agoraphobia, feel like that all the time.

They have, agoraphobia, talking to strangers, checking out at the grocery store, at the bank, going for an interview, at a cocktail party, almost any conversation with a stranger, that’s why the guest called it “life fright.”

How does Anxiety lead to Life Fright

Dr Tra as the author of the book “Call me an Addict, war on women” How does my story regarding anxiety being called “Life Fright” relates to your experience?

I think for that young lady or whoever coined that term, for her that helped her manage her, anxiety disorder. That term helped her understand for herself this thing that she was feeling, so for her that was a good term to use, this, Life Fright. My thoughts when I think about, life fright, is that I’m afraid of living period. The entire gamut of life, so for me I would not use that term as a replicator to, anxiety disorder; but I can see why she did.

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I understand there are 3 types of, Anxiety Disorders,

Situational anxiety
social anxiety and
high functioning anxiety

Can you explain the difference of these forms of, anxiety, and which is most common with substance abuse?

There are more than just three types of, anxiety disorder, way more. I think it’s important also for the audience to understand that when we talk about, anxiety disorder, we’re talking about an irrational fear or, agoraphobia, of something that someone is experiencing. It’s irrational, it’s not logical that you are excessively fearful over this specific situation or you’re apprehensive about something or you have difficulty managing daily tasks. So when we think about, agoraphobia, or, anxiety disorder, I want them to know that it’s irrational to know your heart is racing, and you feel like you’re going to die.

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There are six main categories of, anxiety disorders, like I said there are more than three!

Phobias
Panic attacks, with or without, agoraphobia, you have
Generalized, anxiety disorder,
Obsessive compulsive disorder or, OCD,
Acute stress disorder and
Post-traumatic stress disorder, or PTSD

The American Psychological Association lists research on how, anxiety disorder, is diagnosed.

This disorder called, anxiety disorder, the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual

It’s normal to become anxious and at one time or another. A car almost hit you, you are going for an interview, you sense danger etc. Anxiety is normal under certain conditions, what we are talking about here is the irrational fear or, agoraphobia, that is a disorder.

Something who’s unable to leave their home. This is, agoraphobia, they have a fear of leaving surroundings that they’re familiar with.

This a serious affliction.

There are three systems of functioning that need to change in, Anxiety Disorder

Cognitive
Physical and
Behavioral

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How would, high-functioning anxiety, work?

An addict could develop a, panic attack, because perhaps they’re they don’t have the substance anymore, or it could be someone who gains, agoraphobia, as a result of some interaction they’ve had with a place they frequented to attain their substance.

An addict with, high-functioning anxiety, usually is on a treatment plan in conjunction with medication to control their, anxiety disorder.

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Anxiety disorder is a form of mental illness. Dr Tra outside of substance abuse, what are some other contributing factors to, Anxiety Disorder?

I understand that mental illness presents itself in many forms:

Schizophrenia
Anxiety disorder
Anorexia
Depression

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My research shows that these disorders present themselves as early as 14 years old and can be treated successfully by mental health professionals if treatment is started early; but because people feel that mental illness equals crazy, they don’t talk about it or seek help.

Research show that 90% of suicides results from mental illness like, anxiety disorder, and depression. How does talk therapy from a Life Coach, social worker or Psychologist such as yourself help patients?

Talk therapy allows the client to feel listened to and understood. It allows them to download and get advise. It can save many from suicide.

How would you help someone suffering from, anxiety disorder?

Mental illness is something that keeps a lot of people up at night but nobody wants to talk about during the day

It is the visitor who enters without knocking

1 in 20 become disabled by mental illness i.e. Can’t function in society

So let’s start talking.

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Additional Resources

Drug and Alcohol Treatment for Women with Trauma

https://blog.myhelps.us/understanding-and-managing-compulsive-behaviors/

https://blog.myhelps.us/call-me-an-addict-child-abuse-statistics-p3/

https://adaa.org/understanding-anxiety/suicide

https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/kc/suicidal-thoughts-ideation-193026

March 7, 2021March 19, 2021

How to Awaken to Your Soul Purpose

Your, soul purpose, is to awaken to consciousness and have a human experience through your body. Your, soul, or spirit is eternal.

Welcome to the mindset transformation radio show and podcast. Today’s show is very special to me! I am going to share with you an interview with Neale Donald Walsh, author of, “The Conversations with God,” series on, “How to Awaken Your Soul’s Purpose,”
This is special to me because his book revealed deep truths to me. My eyes were opened in wonderment!
Here are some of the revelations from the book “The Conversations with God’

Truths about Prayer and Soul Purpose

When you pray in order for your prayer to be received by God it must be in a frequency that he can hear. Just as you cannot hear this radio program if my words were not modulated to be transported over the communication lines and then demodulated back so that you can hear them. It is the same way that prayer works. Except the modulator is faith. Jesus never healed anyone who did not have faith. He said “Your faith has made you whole” So if you are asking God to grand you the desires of your heart and you don’t believe that he will, your prayers will never be answered unless it is connected to your, soul purpose.

The other part of the prayer mechanics is this:
You will not have that which you ask, nor anything you want because your request is a statement of lack.
Saying you want a thing only works to produce that precise experience – wanting- in your reality.
Abraham of the Law of Attraction books teaches the same thing.
You have to see yourself in position of the thing you want and not what you don’t want, because if you think of what you don’t want, that is exactly what you will attract and that will show up. Wondering why you keep attracting the same no good man into your experience? That is because you are so detailed in what you don’t want in a man and the Universe complies!

So when you pray you must engage faith and thank God for giving you the desires of your heart and your, soul purpose. You need to tell him all the things you do want in a man. Be just as detailed and then believe him for it. Walk in it. Believe that you already have such a man!

Truths about Relationships and Purpose

It is only through your relationship with people, places and events that you can exist in the universe. You are only who you are, relative to what another person is not. That is why opposites attract! Your, soul, is always looking for its counterpart to complete itself!

When human relationships fail (and they never really fail, they just did not produce the result you wanted), is because they were entered into for reasons not beneficial to their survival and, soul purpose.
The, purpose, of a relationship is to decide what part of yourself you would like to see show up not what part of another you can capture and hold. This revelation made me look at the, purpose, of my marriage from Gods eyes.
The good news is that this marriage survived when the others failed because it had a purpose. One of them was to reveal myself to me.

Truths about Abundance and Soul Purpose

What is an abundant mindset?
Let’s say that you are walking down the road one day and you see a homeless person begging on the street corner. You go into your wallet and notice you have $7, a $5dollar bill and 2 singles. You start to give the homeless person the $5 bill but decide instead to get him the 2 singles. Why did you change your mind about giving the $5 bill? Was it because you felt that it was too much money to part with? Did you feel that you needed it more than the homeless person?

None of these answers suggest an abundant mindset. You are operating from a spirit of lack.
The most rapid way to change a root thought or sponsoring idea is to reverse the thought-word-deed process.
Do the deed that you want to have the new thought about, then say the words that you want to have the new thought about. Do this often and you’ll train the mind to think a new way.
You are what you think you are. When the thought is a negative one, you have to find a way to break out of the cycle. So much of your present experience is based on your previous thought.

Abundance Mindset and Purpose

Let’s say You need $5000 more to close on your new home. You receive a message from God to give $2000 to a sister in the church who just lost her house in a fire. You obey because you have faith that your God is able. Your common sense tells you that you are stupid and that you will never get the money back; but you act on Gods promise. You use the words that God will provide the increase.
He does, a few days later; a check for $10,000 shows up in the mail.
I listened to a message from Joyce Meyers a few weeks back, she shared a similar story. She said that she was broke and laying in bed age her Breast cancer surgery feeling very fearful about her financial situation. Both she and her husband was in full time ministry and depended on her ability to preach for their income. She wouldn’t be able to work for some time.
Then the doorbell rang and someone brought her a check for $10,000. Someone she did not know, but who God sent. From that moment, onward she did not operate out of fear or lack, she knew that God was able. When you are on a journey that matches your, soul purpose, miracles happen.

Soul expressions

When was the last time you cried with joy, wrote poetry, made music, danced in the rain, baked a pie, painted anything, fixed something that was broken, kissed a baby, held a cat to your face, kissed your dog, swam naked, walked at sunrise, played a harmonica, talked till dawn, made love for hours on a beach or in the woods, communed with nature, searched for God, sat alone in silence, or traveled to the deepest part of your being?
When was the last time you said hello to your, soul?
Wow! After reading this I made note to say hello to my, soul, more often. I need to go skinny dipping at the beach, I need to dance in the rain and make love for hours in the woods!

So how do you awaken to your soul purpose?

Your, soul, doesn’t care what you do for a living, the, soul, only cares what you are being, while you are doing what you are doing.

The function of the, soul, is to indicate its desire, not impose it.
The function of the mind is to choose from its alternatives.
The function of the body is to act out that choice.
Your, soul, has brought you to the words you are reading or listening to right now.

How I found my, soul purpose.

One day I was reading a local newspaper. Who reads newspapers these days? I never did. But this day now only did a newspaper appear in my space; but I was guided to pick it up and flip through the pages. In one of the pages was a photograph of someone I thought I recognized so I stopped to look at it. It had her name and the title beside her name, Life coach! I had never seen that word before or heard it anywhere but I knew immediately that was what I was supposed to do.
My, soul, has been directing me all my life. It always brings me to where I need to be and the people I need to be with.

True masters are those who have chosen to make a life, rather than a living.

Life’s irony is that as soon as worldly goods and worldly success are of no concern to you, the way is open for them to flow to you.
I do this for free! Open the windows of heaven Lord!

There comes a time in the evolution of every, soul, when the chief concern is no longer the survival of the physical body, but the growth of the, spirit; no longer the attainment of worldly success but the realization of self.

The goal and, purpose, of your, soul, is to fully realize itself while in your body. To become the embodiment of all that it really is.

Listen to the author Neale Donald Walsh go into detail

You could also listen on iTunes. Please remember to subscribe.

Transform your mind iTunes link

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If you are interested in being a guest on the Transform Your Mind radio TV and podcast, please contact me on the web @ www.myhelps.us or complete the Guest questionnaire and email back to me.

Additional Resources

How to Accelerate Your Soul Journey: Clear these Money Blocks

March 5, 2021March 22, 2021

How Women Get a Seat at the Table

Women are you invisible in the boardroom and have no say? Do men listen when you speak? If the answer is no, then find out how to get, a seat at the table.

In this episode I interview Kimberley Bussey Lewis, Author of , A Seat At The Table, Or Part Of The Meal: Creating A Culture Of Diversity

How did you come to become passionate about, diversity and inclusion, for, women of color?

How to Get a Seat at The Table

I first really started thinking about, a seat at the table, when I was a very young reporter in Charleston, South Carolina. I was the only female reporter at the time within this 600 person company. And what I was struck by is that there were so many decisions that were being made that we would complain about; but none of us had, a seat at the table, to help make those decisions.

I realized that if I didn’t have a place in the room that I was both invisible and silent; so it didn’t matter how much I complained or how much I didn’t like what was going on or simply just didn’t understand it because I was not part of the discussion; I needed, a seat at the table.

So that’s where my passion for, diversity and inclusion, was born.

CNN wrote a column on getting, a seat at the table, for women. They were discussing congresswoman Harris, basically what they’re saying was that women are invisible and they have no say. When they speak no one listens. So I understand what you are saying.

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What happens when there is no seat at the table

I stayed in that company as a reporter without, a seat at the table, about 12 years. It took me that long to get that awakening. Sometimes we think that we are fortunate to have a job so we don’t want to stir the pot. I just increasingly became more and more of a little rebel challenging the status quo. Eventually I left and ventured out to write my first book. I was scared to death. Because here I am I’m going to write a book, I’m going to leave my job. I took a leave of absence to write the book; but it was really a step of faith and in writing the book and doing the research.

I became energized when I interviewed older relatives, my mother and great-aunt who were already in their 80s and 90s at the time. I became energized by their tenacity as, Black women. I knew that we had a lot of strong men in my family, but my eyes are really flew open at the strength of the, black women, and how they held businesses up, they held a family up and the men of the family up, and brought us all together.

I stumbled into the nonprofit arena by my volunteer work. I was volunteering and working on writing the book and one thing led to another. I got to a small job at an organization that was run by a, black woman, who became my mentor. She took me under her wing and even though I was just volunteering she taught me so much about strength and tenacity and making your voice count.

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Diversity and Inclusion for Women of Color

Her company was called Family Assistance Management Services

And she was the first black female insurance broker in SC. She had been a full time teacher before she built quite a nest egg with her husband. They owned several pieces of property in Charleston SC. She then became a broker and started several businesses, an insurance company, a computer training clinic all kinds of other businesses, because she had a passion for helping people.

You got your feet wet on the nonprofit arena and but it sounds like you have, a seat at the table, at Goodwill Industries. Why you write the book, “A Seat at the Table or a part of the meal?”

I was born in September 1964 a month after the discrimination Act, and my parents had not long moved to Charleston, SC. All of my siblings, I have one brother and two sisters, they had all been born at home in the country by a midwife so since it was now illegal for place public places to discriminate my father thought, well I will take my wife to this nice Hospital for my fourth child to be born. So my mother was in labor he rushes her down to this hospital the Medical University of South Carolina and by this time she’d begun to hemorrhage as I was a breech baby.

It was pouring down rain and he got my mom into the emergency area into the lobby and he started screaming for the doctors to come and help they turned looked at them and turned their backs right away. All the white doctors and nurses ignored them, so he ran up to them and screamed my wife is bleeding you got to help her and someone told him to just sit down we’ll get to you.

So he scooped her up, put her in a wheelchair and ran with her down the street to the black Hospital. McLennan banks Hospital in the pouring rain with my mom gripping for life on that wheelchair. He pushed her up into the emergency area and as soon as they saw that she was drenched in blood they rushed her into the emergency room and delivered me. The doctor who delivered me was a, woman of color, from South Africa and he named me Kimberly after the Kimberly diamond mines.

Black Women are born to be at the table

It sounds like you were born in to do this work!

I was tried of being the only, Black woman, in the room. I felt we as, Black women, have to do something to get , a seat at the table. If anyone was going to wave that flag of, diversity and inclusion, equity and of, diversity, it should be Goodwill Industries. So it really began then. We started a task force with a group of CEOs and started to study, diversity and inclusion, and equity programs with fortune 500 companies and fortune 100 companies and other nonprofit organizations. We studied who was doing it well, what were they looking at, what were the metrics and how do you build that diverse pipeline. We came up an implementation plan.

We were really intentional about attracting, maintaining and keeping a, diversity, workforce. Whether it is individuals who are Hispanic or individuals who African-American or LGTBQ or disabled. We recognize that all of that build a table of, diversity.

Podbean

The first time that I heard the phrase, a seat at the table, was from one of my coaching clients and I’ve heard it several times since. I heard Gabrielle Union say it that she’s just gonna make her own table because you know the black actresses in Hollywood are still working to, get a seat at the table. They go through the same discrimination with, diversity and inclusion. It’s not just in Corporate America or in the board rooms.

Women of Color getting a seat at the table

Kimberly you have, a seat at the table, what advice would you give to women who are hitting the glass ceiling and get, no seat at the table.

African-American women unfortunately have been absent from the room! We have not even been invited into the room much less have, a seat at the table, for quite some time. Women in general have been hitting the glass ceiling for quite a long time. I’ve heard that men are hired based on what their hiring manager or that supervisor thinks that they can do while women are hired or promoted based on performance. it is that way because the majority of the, seats at the table, are already held by men. Predominantly white males and they look for men who look like act like they came from where they come from.

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Black women in order to get, a seat at the table, have to do 3 things:

They have to network. It’s all about relationships. Else there is, no seat at the table. Everything that you do is about relationships and it’s about networking. If you didn’t grow up playing golf, learn. Go around places and do things that make you feel uncomfortable. But you must be part of the conversation. Go to the theater, go to the Opera, you could serve as an usher and get free tickets.
Get a mentor – All women should have a mentor.
Get a Sponsor – a sponsor and a mentor are two different people. A mentor is someone that you can talk to about your fears and your aspirations. A mentor can give you sound advice and can talk you through some of the issues that you’re having and help you create a plan a plan of attack.

A sponsor on the other hand is going to be that person who’s going to make sure that you’re invited to that meeting. They’re going to take you under their wing. They’re going to make sure that there’s a place for you in the conversation and that there is, diversity and inclusion, that you are a part of the discussion. Sponsors are usually white males.

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Book: Seat at the table

Have you ever wished that you had the information to elevate the conversation at work on how to build a culture of diversity, equity and inclusion? Well, now you do; with my newly published book A Seat At The Table or Part of the Meal, by Kimberly Bussey Lewis. This book will give you examples of intentional efforts that will level the playing field and yield dividends for your career and your company. The book can be found on Amazon – A Seat at the Table Or Part of the Meal, by Kimberly Bussey Lewis or on www.motivationalmuse.com, so get your copy today and your seat at the table.

Additional Resources, A Seat at the Table

https://blog.myhelps.us/how-transform-your-career-with-purpose/

How to Ask for a Raise or Anything you Want in Life.

What are the, Secrets to Success,? Here are my 10 Secrets

https://www.demos.org/research/taking-our-seat-table-black-women-overcoming-social-exclusion-politics#Black-Women%E2%80%99s-Leadership:-Making-a-Way-out-of-No-Way

https://www.talentintelligence.com/blog/bid/377611/inclusion-and-the-benefits-of-diversity-in-the-workplace

February 25, 2021February 27, 2021

How to Find your Purpose and Destiny By Your Natural Abilities

One of the ways to find your, purpose and destiny, is to to look inside at your natural ability. You were created with a, purpose. Find your, purpose and destiny, by looking at what you have in your hand. There is something you can do better than anyone else on the planet. Seek and you will find it.

This week on #Mindset Transformation radio with coach Myrna, we give insights on 6 Ways to Find Your, Purpose and Destiny. Coach Dan Willms and I interview Keshia Marie Morris Desir, Political Activist, as she shares how she found her, purpose and destiny.

Introduction to Finding Your Purpose and Destiny

Purpose, If you don’t have one, you will will never feel that spiritual fulfillment. The bible teaches that people without a, vision, shall, perish.

I feel that having, vision, lines up with your, purpose, because God places the desires into your heart of what you were born to do.
That is the same statement that God made to Adam and Eve in the garden of Eden. He told them that if they ate from the tree of knowledge, then they will surely die. And they did!
Not a physical death; but a spiritual death. In a similar way the bible teaches that people without a, vision, shall perish, again not a physical death, but in spirit
.
You see, having a, purpose, inspires you to live and not die!

I love this quote from the great Dr. Wayne Dyer

“Purpose, inspires you. When you are inspired by some great, purpose, some extraordinary project; all your thoughts break their bonds, your mind transcends limitations, your consciousness expands in every direction, and you find yourself in a new and wonderful world!” Dr. Wayne Dyer

That is what happened to my daughter Keshia Marie Morris. She became inspired after reading Nelson Mandela’s book “A Long Walk to Freedom”

My partner coach Dan Willms and I interviewed Keshia on our show “You Asked for it”

Here is a poem Keshia wrote and I published in my book “Out of the Snares, a story of hope and encouragement” in my chapter on, Purpose and Destiny.

Order on Amazon

What is Purpose by Keshia Marie Morris Desir

Purpose, is continually evolving
When you emit God from your, purpose,
You close doors that God clearly opened
Know that God is behind your, purpose and destiny.
Take ownership of your, purpose and destiny, for it is not yours, but the Lords.

Purpose, requires you to be diligent
Rebuke laziness in the name of God
Have tunnel vision in regards to your, purpose
Focus on your, purpose and destiny.
Walk in your, purpose
Stand in your, purpose
Don’t forget your, purpose

Neglect those things that hinder your purpose and destiny
Don’t get caught up in daily living and,
Forget what God has purposed
You will never be perfect, only the God,
Who called you to your purpose is perfect!

Purpose, makes you leave what is comfortable
Purpose will help you endure what is uncomfortable
Just because you miss a short-term goal,
It does not take you away from your purpose

The end of your purpose is always bigger than you
Purpose, will always require some suffering!
Your, purpose and destiny, may have many fingers or parts
Beware of wolves in sheep’s clothing,
Who will try to pull you away from your purpose

When you are weak, call on the Lord
Who is with you at ALL Times!
Through him all things are possible!!!
~Keshia Marie Morris

6 Ways to Find Your Purpose

1. To, find your purpose, look inside at your natural ability. You were created with a purpose. There is something you can do better than anyone else on the planet. Seek and you will find it.
2. Find your purpose, by paying attention to the things you like doing. The thing you would do for free. Ask yourself what would I do today if money was not a problem?
3. Find your passion. Do you want to help starving children in Africa? Do you want to stop domestic violence? Do you want to take big money out of politics? What injustice makes you mad? Don’t just talk about it, do something about it.
4. Keep learning and growing. Grow consciously. Read books. Attend seminars, hire a coach or a mentor.
5. Pray. Keep an open connection to God, so you are able to hear him through the Holy Spirit. Ask him what he wants you to do, and he will answer.
6. Reflection. Do you know what you are good at? Are you aware of your strengths? Find a quiet place every day and meditate. It is the only way to connect to source and find out who you truly are.

Understanding Purpose and Destiny

In the principles of, purpose and destiny, bear in mind that, destiny, demands fulfillment, and, purpose, expression. Both are the two-witness principle, as life is not about, purpose, alone. Both are essential for the fulfillment of what you were created for. For, purpose, without, destiny, is like having no real life at all. It’s like being on earth illegally. Therefore, we must define life from a sense of, destiny, by God’s purpose and design for our life, fulfillment, and the completion of God’s eternal purpose. We are to consider chiefly that God has a, purpose, in each of us to be fulfilled, for we are purposed and perfected with a, purpose, and destined and designed with, destiny.

We should take into consideration that our, destiny, comes from the true meaning of what the Father has eternally purposed us for? According to Ephesians 1:18, do we realize that our purpose is centered and ordained in the SON? Or are we so self-driven with our own ambition to fulfill our own expectation and desires?

Please subscribe to my podcast on iTunes.
coach Myrna itunes podcast

To contact me to be a guest on this show or for sponsorship opportunities, please send me an email at info@myhelps.us or on the web at www.myrnayounghelps.com

Additional Resources

Your Talent is Already in your Hand

How to Find Your Purpose in Life

February 19, 2021February 25, 2021

Let the Universal Laws of Attraction Work For You

There is more to becoming a deliberate creator, than just letting the, universal laws, of attraction bring to you the desires of your heart. We all know it does not work like that. Some of you have been asking the, Universe, and praying to God for years, and you are still waiting to manifest your desires into your experience.

“Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you.
Matthew 7:7

This is a big topic. There is a lot written on, the Laws of Attraction. In my book “Out of the Snares” I embrace these, universal laws, fully. I also expected and allowed what I was attracting to show up. I lived consciously believing that ..

“there are no coincidences in life, that everything moment is as it should be.” ~~Deepak Chopra

I tell the story in my book “Out of the Snares” of me coming to the USA under the USA Free trade agreement, which allows Canadians and Mexicans to open up branch offices of current businesses in the USA; but when I got to the United States, I decided I wanted the benefits of being an American. I told myself “It would be nice if I found a husband.” As soon as I concentrated on that possibility the, Universal laws, started offering up to me suitors for me to choose from!

Become a deliberate creator using the universal laws

There is more to becoming a deliberate creator, than just asking and receiving for everything you want. We all know it does not work like that. Some of you have been asking the, Universe, and praying to God for years, and you are still waiting to manifest your desires into your experience.

Here are 5 ways to help with being a deliberate creator and invoking the Universal laws.

1. Offer no resistance:
You have to offer no resistance to the, universal laws, you are letting go and letting God. In the above example. If and when the thought, came to me to find a husband and I had a bad experience with a prior husband and I told myself that most men are no good, then essentially what I am doing is saying on one hand I would like a husband and on the other hand, I don’t want a man because they are nothing but trouble. That sends mixed messages to the, universal laws, of attraction.

2. You have to allow it to come in.
Look at your list of things you want to attract in your life as people outside the walls of one of the ancient cities. This is, the secret. They can’t come in unless someone opens the gates of the city. In a similar way, you have to quiet your mind and stop confusing the, Universe, with all the stuff in your head. Find time every day to meditate and allow the, Universe, and its, universal laws, to work for you.

3. You have to believe in the 7 universal laws

Faith, is the evidence of things unseen. The bible teaches that if you have the, faith, of a mustard seed, you can say to the mountain get up and go into the sea. Faith is one way to let the, universal laws, work in your life. Logically and in the physical world that is not possible but Jesus was teaching us that “If you believe you can do anything.” That is truth. I have seen amputees climb to the top of Mount Everest, I have seen people swim across lakes, I have seen human beings defy incredible odds to survive and achieve. It all starts in the mind, if you think you can.

4. You have to be conscious of your emotions.
Your emotions are a powerful indicator of if you are moving towards or away from your desires. If you feel elated and happy, you are moving in the direction of your desires; if you feel dread and nervousness then that is your heart telling you that it knows something you don’t. Learn to pay attention. The trick is to not spend time thinking about the things that make you feel bad because you will attract more of them.

5. Become a deliberate creator or Sorcerer.
Sorcerer means from the source. Becoming a Sorcerer means that you are letting source energy and the, universal laws, work for you. It means that you meditate on what you want, pray and ask God to help you get it and then you move out of the way and let him do his work. The focus here is on the word “meditate”. You have to get still and hear God. When you do, you will get inspiration and instruction on how to move that mountain out of the way. You will get instructions on how to turn your business around, how to motivate your children, new book ideas etc.

In my book “Out of the Snares” I share with you, my readers, the principles of the Bible and the Universal Laws or Truths that I stood on to win. Order your copy today.https://myhelps.us/book-order/

Additional Resources

https://blog.myhelps.us/if-you-build-it-they-will-come/

https://blog.myhelps.us/law-of-harvest-are-you-eating-seed/

February 5, 2021February 5, 2021

How to Find Your Purpose in Life

You can, find your purpose, in life by paying attention to your passions. Your master, purpose in life, is to spread happiness. You will always see the optimism in life no matter how dark it may seem.

Are you lifted by your purpose? This week on Mindset Transformation Radio and Podcast, I interview Ms Arifah Yusuf who is not only lifted by her, purpose, but founded a company called Lifted By Purpose where she helps youths in Toronto, Canada to become lifted by their purpose.

As Arifah was working with the youth she noticed their tattoos and decided to have a spin off company called Tattoo Stories. She used the tattoos stories to help her clients share their stories through the images they permanently put on their bodies.

How to Find Your Purpose in Life

How we perceive images can help us, find your purpose.

How you react to an image can tell you a lot about you, including your, life’s purpose.
Art speaks to us because it’s about us. It’s about our collective and individual journeys in this wondrous, immeasurable universe.

As Chuck Klosterman said, “Art and love are the same thing: It’s the process of seeing yourself in things that are not you.” Images stir up numerous emotions in the beholder: awe, shock, sorrow, rage, and even repulsion. You may feel an intense, nameable emotion within seconds of seeing an image, or it could take several minutes of staring at the image before you can decide what it means to you. And as art is as diverse as the people who create and perceive it, the responses to it naturally vary. Art can play a crucial role in self-discovery and an individual’s, purpose in life.

Image test to find your purpose

Click the link below to take your image, purpose, test and see what it shows is your, purpose.

https://themindsjournal.com/this-image-test-will-reveal-your-true-purpose-in-life/

I took this test and my test revealed that my purpose was to spread Happiness. So True.

“Your master, purpose in life, is to spread happiness. You will always see the optimism in life no matter how dark it may seem. You can distinguish the lightness from the darkness and this is what takes you to another level. With happiness, everything can be cured and your purpose is to spread this feeling in times most needed.”

Bio

Arifah Yusuf, is a registered social worker from Ryerson University. She has 12 years experience engaging and developing programs for youth, facilitating workshops and providing counseling services. Ms. Yusuf was nominated and awarded the Community Health Champion Award for her dedication working with youth. In 2015 she received the leadership award from Canadian Alliance of Black Educators and in 2016, the Ontario Leading Women in Community Award.

She is trained and certified by the National Organization for Victims Assistance, Traumatology institute, and is a Mental Health First Aid Instructor. In her role at Lifted By purpose, she is the Founder and Executive Director.

How did you find your purpose?

Can you tell us your journey as a social worker and how it transitioned into founding Lifted by Purpose?
I grew up a a rough neighborhood in Toronto. As a youth, I had a family member who died from Homicide and that affected me profoundly; but I did not have an outlet to grieve so I became very depressed. As I got older, I wanted to become a social worker so I can help other youths who experienced trauma to have a space to talk and get help. This is how I found my, purpose.

Today “Lifted by purpose” helps youths, find their purpose, and provides services to help the youth with coping skills and prepare for a purposeful future.

Using tattoo stories to find the meaning of life

You have an offspring from Lifted by purpose called Tattoo stories. Can you tell our audience what that is about and how tattoo helps youths find their, purpose.

During counselling I started asking my clients to tell me their stories about the permanent tattoos on their bodies. I found that these tattoos were connected to their, purpose in life. Most life events are marked with a tattoo.

Services offered to help find your purpose

What are some projects and services provided by Lifted by purpose.
At Lifted by Purpose we focus on the arts.
Some of our services are:

Music stress program 10 to 20 weeks
Playlist therapy that identifies tracks that speak to grief or loss
How to have healthy Relationships
How to identify triggers that move them into making bad choices
Identify coping skills
Tattoo stories and what they mean

I see from the information you provided me for the interview that your target audience is young people between the ages of 16 to 29 years who are at risk or already in the justice system. How does your program help these young people, find your purpose.

Our program helps our youth to harness their story

Understand how to utilize their stories to understand themselves.
Reflect on how their stories has influenced their choices in life
How to flip a negative story into something positive
Action steps. Are they ready to make a change
How does their story affect their purpose and lift them up.

How does Tattoo stories tie into meaning of life

Tattoo stories Helps the youth understand their, purpose and have a voice that can help others on their journey.

Order Here

Additional Resources

https://blog.myhelps.us/6-ways-to-find-your-purpose/

February 4, 2021February 5, 2021

How do You Define Success?

Defining Success

Question 1: How do you define success?
As successful musicians, would you define, success, by how far you have come in your career or do you feel that success has to do with how happy we are?

Joe: I define, success, as the simple act of making, goals, and working towards it.
I believe that we should make both short term, goals, and long term, goals, i.e make 6 month, goals, so we can check them off as we achieve them and longer term, goals, like 5 to 10 years.

Definition of Success

William – I define, success, as “Not Quitting”
I believe that we have to persevere to accomplish our goals and success to me is being knocked down and getting back up.

Darrell – I define success as a legacy.
I believe that we have to leave legacy for our children and families.

Question 2: How have you used failure to fuel your success?
Can you tell the audience of some of your most profound failures and how it lead to your ultimate, success?

William – We should use failures to help us grow and to learn from our mistakes.
Also I have developed the personal mantra that says that

No means Not Now!

So I have become successful by just getting the No’s out of the way to get to the Yes
I also believe that the acronym POOR means Pass Over Opportunity so I always look for opportunities in my failures.

Failure makes us Stronger

Darrell – Failure makes us stronger.
For me failure is never an option.
My acronym is JOB Just Over Broke
Because if you have a job and working for the man, you will always be Just Over Broke!

BIM – When you fall you get back up, you never stay down.

Joe – I won’t lie, failure makes you want to quit!
When your kids are hungry and they are looking at you with eyes that say we are hungry
It does make you want to quit but you always have to remember your WHY.
If you don’t know your WHY, then you will fail because you will not have the strength to persevere and stay the course.

Define the Success Mindset

Question 3: As you know, success, is a mindset.

What are some of your beliefs that allowed you to succeed?

Joe – My belief is what you get out what you put in!
And Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.

BIM – Pray! I am always on my knees praying

Darrell – I believe in a higher power

William – I believe Why Not Me?
Why can’t I be a successful Entrepreneur?
I believe that God put us on this earth to live more abundantly and not just to survive.

How to be Successful

What advise would you give to our listeners including our female listeners on, how to be successful.

There has been a lot of attention lately on women having to endure male advances and harassment to succeed. How can women be successful without giving up their values to men? How do you feel this can be prevented?

William – Women have to believe to believe in their, success. They are smarter than men because they have natural intuition. They are and as such they should not have to give up their morals to get ahead.
They have to believe that they have equal rights as much as men to the positions they aspire to be in.

How do you define your success?

Success, is the achievement of something that you have been trying to do.
Success, is the achievement of a high position in a particular field, for example in business or politics.
Someone or something that is a, success, achieves a high position, makes a lot of money, or is admired a great deal.

As we enter into the New Year, what are your, goals, for, success?
Where did you miss the mark in the year that passed?

Do a year in review.
Did you let circumstances get the way of your perseverance?
Or did you achieve all your goals?

If you did not, maybe this would be the time to invest in yourself and hire a Life Coach.

Learn more

Additional Resources

Nothing is Impossible: How to Turn Life’s Challenges Into Opportunity

February 3, 2021February 5, 2021

The Alchemy of Desire: The Power of Attention

Attention, is the magical process of that facilitates the transformation of your desire, to reality. This Alchemy of, desire, allows this transformation to happen faster if we empower it with, attention.

In this episode we are going to teach you how to use the, Power of Attention, to manifest all your dreams and desires.

What is, desire, – desire, can be called the feminine face of God! I love this sentence! desire, is what God places in your spirit to lead you to your purpose. It is the key that unlocks what God placed you on this earth to do.

The Alchemy of Desire

We, desire, our partners physically and spiritually,

we, desire, our careers,
we, desire, to procreate and have children,
we, desire, to be emotionally and physically healthy,
we, desire, to be wealthy
but most of all we, desire, to fulfill our purpose on this earth and leave it a better place then we found it.

We talked about how to manifest the, desires, of your Heart. The first step is knowing what you want. The second step is adding, attention, to it.

We talked on how to use the, Energy of Desire, to create something magical. If you missed those 2 episodes, please listen to then my iTunes podcast

Power of Attention

Today I want to talk about the “Power of Attention”
• Now that we know what we want.
• We know how to use the energy of, attention, to engage the laws of attraction.
• Now we want to light our, desire, afire with, Attention.”

You remember as a kid you would hold a magnet over a piece of paper and have the, attention, of the sun light the paper afire? That is what the, Power of Attention, can do to your, desires.

So, lets dive right in.

Using the power of attention to attract your soulmate

Tune in to Sticher to listen to my guest tell her personal story of using, The Power of Attention, after her divorce to attract her soulmate.

The word, desire, does not only belong with, sexual desires. As a, Mindset Coach, today I want to show you how the energy of, Power of Attention, to transform your, desires, into something magical.

Activating The power of Attention

Attention, is your power source. Rarely does a quality life just show up by chance. What you give your, attention, to expands.
If you want your dream to come through, you have to do more than dream. You must focus your, attention, and activate, the power of Attention.

The power source for having an Intention that comes through is, Attention. What you pay, Attention, to will grow.

If your intention comes from the level of your true self, it can attract anything. Attention, activates the, energy of Attraction.

Every wish or, desire, is like a tiny seed that contains the blueprint for the tree that manifests from the seed. The seed of, desire, which is also the seed of any Intention needs nourishment to grow.

How to Manifest your Desire

If you want your, desire, to manifest here are some important ways to put the right, attention, on it:

1. Have a clear intention or goal; don’t muddy it with doubt and fear regarding why it won’t come true.

2. Have positive emotions around your, desire. Feel how good it will be to fulfill it and hold it in your hands.

3. Believe that what you want is beneficial to you without any negative consequences to those around you.

4. Be prepared for any response the Universe brings and be flexible to where you go from there.

5. Feel confident that hidden sources will come to your aide once your, desires, are released to the universe.

6. Find time to meditate on your, desires. At the level of the soul, the energy of attraction, is most powerful.

Using the Power of Attention for Love

Margo, how can someone use the, Power of Attention, to change someone’s feelings about them?

I have known lot of men who are able to woo women by paying them, attention. I have been on the receiving end of, attention, that changed my feelings for a partner a few times in my life. My Pastor once said that women are responders, I agree.

In our last blog post we talked about 4 of the ways renowned sexologist Jaiya believes that we are wired. We discussed the:

Energetic,
the Sensual,
the Sexual and
the Kinky sexual types.

Jaiya is the author of Red Hot Touch? Today I though we could look at the Shape Shifter who can be all those energies.

Here are the 5 Sexual or Erotic Blueprints.

6. Energetic: Turned on by space, tease and anticipation.
7. Sensual: Turned on by comfort, relaxation and all the senses ignited.
8. Sexual: Turned on by nudity and flat out sexual intercourse.
9. Kinky: Turned on by the taboo and power play.
10. Shapeshifter: Turned on by all of the above.

Margo, since today we are looking at ,The Power of Attention, how can a woman who is the, Shape Shifter, to create something magical in the bedroom?

This episode of the Mindset Transformation radio show and podcast is being brought to you by Hypnosis Everywhere and M-I-X- A-M-O-R-E.

Today we talked about, The Power of Attention, and to use this energy to create transformation in your lives.
•
I want to leave you with this thought. When all three legs of the tripod are in place –

Focused Attention,
Flexible consciousness
and pure awareness; the path is open.

You become the conscious master, the Energy of Attraction, is activated.

There are certain things that hinder the manifestation of, desire. Severe obstacles such as depression, anxiety, low self-esteem, substance abuse and toxic relationships block the manifestation of your desires. It gets tangled up in personal problems.
So be sure to meditate on your, desires, and rid yourself of toxicity either from substance abuse or toxic relationships.

If you found this episode inspirational or you learned anything, Please subscribe to my Itunes podcast and rate and review this Episode, so we can be encouraged to bring you more episodes every week.

Additional Resources

The Alchemy of Desire

https://blog.myhelps.us/alchemy-desire-episode-5-long-term-relationship-dance/

January 23, 2021January 16, 2021

How to Dream Big in the Quantum Matrix

The concept of, dream big, is to not let yourself become small. Not just react to what life’s dishing out. We need to, dream bigger, because the universe gives you exactly what we ask for. If you ask for 50 cents instead of $1 you will get 50 cents.

https://www.iheart.com/podcast/269-Transform-your-Mind-29542107/

Introduction to, Dream Big

Ilona Selke, shares The concept of, dream big, is to not let yourself become small. Not just react to what life’s dishing out. Today on the Transform Your Mind with Coach Myrna podcast. I am so excited to be talking to international best-selling author Ilona Selke. Ilona who is currently travelling the USA directly from Bali where she spends seven months of a year.

So envious, Ilona is promoting her new book, “Dream Big, the Universe is Listening”. We’re going to be talking about shifting your reality in the, quantum, matrix. I meditate every morning and then I go walking and meditate some more while I listen to podcasts. This morning I was listening to the Hay House World Summit podcast and the guest was Dr. Bruce Lipton, he was teaching us that, Quantum mechanics, or the, quantum, matrix is the foundation for all Sciences.

Chemistry and Biology sit on top of, Quantum mechanics. When I came back from my meditation, I put a note in my journal that I needed to read some more, quantum, matrix books. Then as I going over our show notes, I noticed that your book is about the, quantum mechanics, and that we’re going to be talking about, quantum mechanics. I look forward to fast tracking my learning!

Ilona – Yep, the Universe is indeed listening, Bruce Lipton’s book title is “The Biology of Belief,” he talks about what he calls Epigenetics. I love the fact that he talked about the, Quantum Matrix. Someone was saying that we when we watched the movie The Matrix, that it looked like science fiction; but we could be in something similar to that in real life.

The subtitle of my book it’s called, Dream Big, the Universe is listening, I know we have all these religions across the world and no matter who they believe the right version of God is, there is only one source. Let’s just be honest, if there were multiple sources we’d have a war on our hands. Source multiplies itself and then humans interpret it differently.

Formulate your prayer if you want to pray or if you meditate your visualization in such a way that the universe can decode your message. The Universe has its own language and we don’t need to learn a computer language. Luckily we are endowed with a language, but most of us do it incorrectly. I want to help everybody do it in a way that the Universe will start listening.

https://myhelps.us/podcast-sponsorship-transform-your-mind/

Today’s episode is being sponsored by T.Y Waterproofing, serving the Atlanta area. T.Y Waterproofing has over 30 years’ experience in waterproofing and basement repairs. Let T.Y Waterproofing, waterproof your crawl spaces, slabs, remove and kill mold, install pumps and French drains. Call Timothy at (404)449-5467 for a free estimate.

https://www.fiverr.com/turkey13/give-you-1-30-second-radio-commercials-with-host-endorsement?arrived_from_manage_gigs=true&display_share=true

Ilona is an International Best-selling Author, seminar leader, lecturer, musician CEO and co-founder of Living from Vision. Ilona has inspired thousands of people worldwide to discover the power of their consciousness and to create successful lives. Ilona has written four books, produced music and meditation CDs, co-authored two books one with Brian Tracy, and one with Jack Canfield, she also has been a regular guest on A&E, Bravo TV with Jack Canfield, and a producer and TV show host for Quantum Living show on women’s broad broadcast TV.

Why we should, Dream big

One of the things I set out to figure out was how to talk to the Universe. I observed regularly is that whenever I said I don’t want something, that’s what I got. Can you imagine, I was so delighted to figure out that I recognized one definite Law of the Universe, which was “I got what I didn’t want.” I’m gonna ask you to not think of a pink elephant.

Can you do that? I don’t think so. I want to know what is in your head right now? A pink elephant! I figured out the Universe. If I say I don’t want a bicycle for my Christmas gift, guess what the Universe is going to give me for Christmas? When I said I don’t want a bike, I visualized the bike and made me manifest it. I learned to, dream big.

I figured out the Universe has a law which is it gives me what I don’t want. Maybe God or the Universe has a different plan. I could say I want to be in that big castle, I can see myself in it. I should say something I really want. I want millions of listeners to my podcast. Let’s say millions of listeners, that’s what I want. All these people who are sitting on this planet listening. They are ignited they are excited.

There are others who are also listening right now, millions of them, they are listening and we are one. We are all vibrating together. It’s not just one here in the neighborhood, and one there, we are collectively globally. A large group of people and we are all building the new world. We are shifting the paradigm together and we are millions and we are listening and we are taking the lessons and making them real in our daily life to prove to ourselves and our family that this Universe is listening.

That this paradigm is really living. This is what I did when I was 10 years old. I just had to learn about changing that no factor, and then when I’m 14, I said okay I’m going to go teach the world to be creative, and so I always say when you do, make sure you always add that little sentence that says “for the highest good”

Here are three easy steps to, dream Bigger:

Describe it
Imagine it,
Feel it

Allow yourself five minutes, the luxury of being in your fulfillment. Five minutes, millions of people just see it. Five million listeners around the world. How would you feel right now if you had five million listeners?

Myrna – I would feel good. I would feel that I was given a mandate from God and I would protect that mandate by caring for my 5 million listener. I would make sure they are fed, inspiring messages every week and that my platform will contain good content. I have the intention that I want to reach the world before every recording.

I want to give you a little synopsis, Dream Big, the Universe is listening, and then we’re going to dive in little deeper in her book. Ilona takes you into a journey into the greater mystery of the universe, she takes you step by step, as she mentioned earlier through fascinating stories and how to manifest your goals and, dream big.

At the same time you, dream big, you create a better life for yourself. In the planet we’re a living in a consciousness interactive universe. For you to become the master of your destiny, you need to dive into your subconscious mind and reach into your super consciousness. Ilona travels across the globe teaching other levels of consciousness.

She describes in easy-to-follow steps just how magical life really is when you learn to, dream bigger. After reading her book, you will come away inspired and equipped to make your dreams come true and create a better life for yourself on this planet. Check her out at www.ilonaselke.com.

What is the biggest lesson you think that readers can take from the concept of, dream big?

Ilona – The concept of, dream big, just itself, I’ve had people who just take the book and go oh my God I’ve let myself become small. I’ve let myself just react to what life’s dishing out. All the demands and I’ve forgotten to, dream big,. I’ve forgotten to listen to my own self. So sometimes just holding the book in their hands without opening a page they’ve gone to the place of, dreaming bigger.

I want to remember to take time for myself and to, dream big, again because maybe we had dreams of who and what we wanted to do, and then some of them got either fulfilled or not. We have kids and get stuck at home, or as a woman, do the providing job thing, and feel like we’re trapped in a rut. That’s when we need to take time and to, dream big, to think about what we want.

To listen to our soul, to our heart, and to step back out of the house. Buzz out of our life and to step back and to do what’s really meaningful to us. I said I’m going to give away a free app, that will guide people about God. Listeners can do this for 5 minutes every day, even if you just do that you start setting up a habit, where your soul and heart, your spirit will start saying thank you for listening to me.

It’ll start giving you nudges, it’ll start coordinating things for you. People will call you at the right time. I’ve had people who walk into a bookstore and my book literally fell into their lap. You put out the vibrational frequency, and anything that matches it, will come in.

I hate to admit it is that unfortunately the mass number of people are more interested in soap operas and dramas and disasters, rather than making their lives better by, dreaming big.

You don’t have to follow any religion. You can just simply tune into the universe, which I call the source, and start your own conversation. Start talking to god by sitting down and saying what you need. Set up a conversation with this higher power, God and then if you have a desire and wish and needs, a dream or something you want to contribute to the world, just ask for it.

Let’s say you need a certain amount of money every month, you may think hell, I need to be able to travel the world, I need to travel to other countries, I need to see other cultures to expand my horizon, that’s what I really want. The universe says, ok. If we catch ourselves saying well I really want to travel the world; but then in your heart you feel these I have responsibilities, I don’t want to leave, I’m afraid, maybe I get sick or whatever all your butts, they are the reasons why we stay where we are, stuck.

Because you’re giving conflicting information. You’re saying, yes I want it, but then you’re saying well no, I don’t want it because of that. Those little voices are usually not that loud, we feel them we try to ignore them, we try to say no, no I’m not really thinking that.

Dreaming Bigger in the Quantum Field

In my book, Dream Big, the Universe is Listening, I give techniques of how to deal with those little butts and snarling voices, or those tight feelings in the tummy, because they are at first blockages. Later on that block becomes your stepping stone. I tell you I am teaching this technique to doctors, therapists, hypnotherapists, all over the world. A lot of them have taken it to substitute the other techniques they used to use, because this one really works.

Myrna – It definitely does. I like what you said about there’s just so many people that are interested in reality TV shows and sports and the news and things like that and don’t spend any time, dreaming big. I wrote my first book “Becoming Conscious, my Awakening, about four years ago and that’s basically when I started to understand synchro destiny and, Quantum matrix, and envision and all the things that you talk about. I’d be on that path and that’s one of the reasons my vision was to have this radio program and then podcast. I talked about transforming your mind because that’s where it starts.

Ilona – There are four different interpretation. One of them actually allows for the idea that we live in the universe that has parallel dimensions and parallel realities all at coexisting simultaneously. I train teachers and coaches, we have the course in Chinese we have students in China and Czechoslovakia in Germany in England and Spanish English Spanish, French, German, Czech, Chinese, and my books are out also in Hindi, and in Czechoslovakia and Russian, so we try to go worldwide.

All humans alike they don’t really well I mean they like to have an idea of how the universe works but the trick to creating a shift in the matrix of time-space is to slowly but surely build up your miracles, so that you really feel the universe is listening to you. Talk to it and you can transform your negative doubts and beliefs and pave the way for the beautiful expression of who you really are.

Scientists don’t even believe in God, but the quantum physicists say well there is something weird going on which implies that there is a greater intelligence at work. All of them right now are trying to develop a new worldview and quantum physics has lent itself the closest to different understanding. It’s a modern way of saying there is a God and there is the observer affect. The observer who is looking at the experiment is changing the outcome!

I actually published in the book with Jack Canfield, he’s the co-author of Chicken soup of the Soul, and the chapter about it is really about a Mind Bender, I described how I close my eyes and talk this mind-bending story through to God and I see the techniques are the same. You become clear on what you want you imagine what it would look like.

If it had already happened and you feel as if it had already happened, so in my body and bones I was sitting there not only visualizing being arriving on time and being in the end result. I’m not only applying myself, but I’m also feeling in my bones. It takes a lot of practice. I tell people is start small. I started creating parking lots and then build your way up build your confidence up.

Transform your Mind Soundcloud podcast

Is the Quantum Matrix real?

https://www.disclose.tv/you-are-living-inside-a-quantum-computer-program-the-matrix-is-real-308185

I definitely need some help. I’ve been working and working on this thing for a while and I’m a very I’m a deterring person. It’s hard for me to visualize. I can get the emotion and I can talk myself through it, but I want to see it in my mind.

I’ve got a trick for you. Here let’s do this, because a lot of people are in your shoes, they go I can’t visualize for anything. Some people are more kinesthetic types, maybe are one of them. I’m going to do a test for you and you’re probably going to come out with flying colors like everybody who’s listening.

How to Visualize and Dream Big

I would like you to visualize a tree as best as you can. Just a tree, an ordinary tree and move to one side of the tree, you’re going to put a red dog and on the other side of the tree is a blue dog. Now I want you to take your index finger that you like the best and point it to the red dog just point. Which side did you point? Right side, okay well honestly some people have the red dog on the right some people have it on the left. Now tell me when you say you can’t visualize, how come you knew that the red dog was on the right side of the tree?

I’m not seeing the dog. I can see the tree because I walk and see trees every day so I think I can visualize a tree, but I’m not seeing the red dog. I’m just imagining.

That works just as well because the most important aspect is the feeling. Imagine you’re sitting down and having lemonade, as a matter of fact somebody serves you the lemonade and a good lemon cut open to a quarter and really fresh. You decide to bite into that lemon. You take that wedge of lemon and you’re going to imagine you take it and you bite into it.

I’m tasting that sour, I’m not actually seeing it but I am like you can imagine thinking exactly. I imagine it in my mind. I’m a reader and I cry at movies and I cry when I see stuff. I cry when I read books, so I get myself in the picture. I want to see with my third eye and it’s not happening.
Let me ask you one question. Did you start salivating more when I asked you to bite into that lemon?

Yes I did.

Ilona – I’ve lived with a lot of imaginary stuff. I visualized and, dreamed big, every day. I work on it, in fact I did this course called the “wealth magnet” and every morning I sit down I imagine different success things like what my what my Rolls-Royce is going to feel like when I drive it and what my big house, over looking the mountains is going to feel like!

There are two things when we say visualizing, one means representing to yourself something that is not currently physically in front of you; but you can put yourself into. Two, if you can create and feel the feeling of already doing it. Now when you say I’m visualizing myself driving in a Rolls Royce you giggled I can tell you that is the part of you that says I don’t have it. I shouldn’t be thinking that or it’s funny.

You heard me talk about I want to have millions of listeners in order to do, I have to, dream big,.

Author interview Transform Your Mind Podcast

Conclusion

Myrna – I would love for you all to review the podcast on iTunes. This encourages my guests and encourages other people to be able to listen to this life changing program. Ilona, so go ahead and tell them what the FREE GIFT is today for posting a review on iTunes.

Visit my website www.ilonaselke.com download the FREE app if you want to start your day with positive focus and be supported, I’ll do that for you for free. I’ll do that every morning with you. With my more meditative voice and with much more singsong in my voice. Also if you want to end your day on a good note come with me on this journey called “living from vision.” it’s called the “Living from Vision” light App. It’s available both on Google and Android. If you purchase my book, “Dream Big, the Universe is Listening” it will also give you the directions of how to get the App.

Dream Big, the Universe is Listening. This has been a very inspirational high-energy interview, we came out of the gate running like some racehorses. I loved it, we’re out of time right now but Ilona is going to be back next week and we are going to talk about “How to find it your Soulmate” so be sure to tune in for that because you don’t want to miss it.

Ilona – I’m going to share with you “How to have sex out-of-body” Wow, yes the men are going to come knocking now, women too! Well Ilona it has been an absolute pleasure. I definitely will go and not only get the free app but I’m also going to download your book, Dream Big, the universe is listening.

Thank you so much for spending the time with me today. For more information on Myrna Young, Life Coach visit me on the web at www.myrnayounghelps.com. I thank you listeners for tuning into www.wdjyfm.com, the Transform Your Mind with coach Myrna podcast, available on iTunes, Google Play, stitcher, and now on I Heart Radio, you can listen to it yet anywhere.
Until next time Namaste.

Additional resources:

The Secret to Having it All