The Circle of Life: Embracing Motherhood

Circle of life: Motherhood

Keshia Morris Desir, my daughter and mom to be interviews me on motherhood.  In my book Out of the Snares, a story of hope and encouragement I talk about motherhood and how being a mom is my purpose.

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Bio

Keshia Morris Desir has a blossoming career in DC. She is an activist working in DC to disrupt the over criminalization of communities of color by investigating and exposing the underlying causes of mass incarceration through a democracy lens.  Getting incarceration money out of politics, and advocating for guaranteed voting rights for everyone, including people serving time in prison. But today she is speaking as my daughter about becoming a mother. She is entering into the second trimester of her first pregnancy.

Keshia: I am super excited to be here with my mother today to interview her on her book, Out of the Snares: A story of hope and encouragement and her chapter on, motherhood.

The very first question I have for you, mom is in your book, you share a bit about the, circle of life, and how your parents were not married when you were born. So, for folks that haven’t yet read the book, can you share a little bit about that experience?

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My circle of life started with poverty and child abuse

Myrna: Yes, I would love to. Out of the Snares, is basically my story. It’s the story of me getting out of the snares of, child sexual abuse, poverty, being born in a third world country. And, of course, being born to parents, or who were not married. My mom and my dad hooked up and had sex and I showed up. They weren’t even really in a committed relationship. It’s one of those things that happened. When I read Oprah’s story I found out that her parents also hooked up just one time and created her.  We were both born for a purpose.

So, I pull that in to my experience, that I was born with a purpose. On that rainy day, all those years ago in Guyana, my mom was alone when I was born because my father was not around. And I feel that coming from that kind of nurturing environment, where my mother was my central figure or my central person. For a long time, it was my mom, it was my grandmother, it was my aunt. These are the people that kind of raised me and as I got a little older, my father came back into my life.

But yes, I learned everything that I know about, motherhood, from my mom and my grandmother and my mom is an amazing mother. She has four children, and she basically single handedly raised them all on her own because the men were not around. She was that unfortunate, the men kept leaving. Your dad and I broke up when you were five years old. So, I have been the most influential person in your life and I took that very seriously.  So, that’s basically my introduction to, motherhood.

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The connection between Single mothers and delinquent children

Keshia: As you were speaking, I’m thinking about my work.  And I’m thinking about what usually breeds or is usually the crux of, black families, being involved in the, criminal justice system. Thankfully, none of your brothers and sisters have been involved in the, criminal justice system, and I just want to know, what do you what do you attribute that to? Because often we do hear of, black families, that come from, quote, unquote, broken homes where fathers aren’t in the picture.  They get involved in crime, they go down the wrong path, they get involved in the, criminal justice system, somehow. So, what do you attribute your family success to?

Myrna: Excellent question. And I’ve thought about this a while now, not in Guyana, because we left Guyana as children. So, we weren’t old enough to get into the, criminal justice system, in Guyana. But when we were living in Toronto, Canada, we actually lived in the projects. And I have always wondered why my siblings didn’t get involved with the bad crowd.  I’ve always wondered about that and the only thing that I can come up with was that my mother loved us and we didn’t want to disappoint her. I was speaking to her a couple of weeks back. And it was really interesting what she said. She said to me, you know, I had yawl, and I took any job because I had yawl to feed!

Keshia: Thank you for sharing that mom, it was really helpful to hear that feedback. It was just something that I was thinking about. I’m just gonna turn it back over to you. I think you have something a poem that you’d like to share.

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Motherhood my baby girl is born

Myrna: Yes. Right. So, in my chapter on, motherhood, I start off my book talking about the, circle of life, continues where I was born, and then I dived right into, motherhood, because it was something that was very important to me and made me feel so special. I have two biological children. I was 21 years old when my son was born, and then you my daughter was born on my 30th birthday. So, because she was born on my 30th birthday, she was a girl and a lot of women always want little baby girls. You know, I was tickled pink, in fact, it becomes more special than that. She was conceived for my honeymoon.

So, I came back from my honeymoon, and a couple of weeks later found out that I was pregnant. The immediate response of me learning that I was pregnant was joy. I mean, I didn’t know the sex until she came out. But we had a connection from the very beginning. So, in my book, I actually wrote a poem that I want to read to you guys. It says,

Poem my baby girl is here

My greatest blessing showed up on my 30 birthday,

A bundle of joy for born to this world

Six pounds, seven ounces of joy, my birthday gift. Oh, what a toy.

I little girl with curly brown hair, smooth black skin, with the face of an angel.

I shed a tear it was a love affair at first sight.

She reached through my heart and grabbed my soul forever more.

God had given me the desires of my heart, a daughter to adore.

Bird sang, trees swayed, the sun shone brightly, and the heavens opened up and poured out rain.

My baby girl was here. Keshia, her father whispered welcome to my world.

And her mother answered, Glory be to God, let her light shine brightly.

Let her be a delight.

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Transform Your Mind Podcast Pandora

Myrna: See, I spoke it into existence, you have been a delight. You have been the gift that keeps on giving. A lot of mothers and daughters have special relationships, but we have a relationship that everybody talks about, and it’s absolutely amazing.

Keshia: Wow. It’s been a while since I’ve heard that poem. I have a jacket on but if you could see my arms, I probably have goosebumps. I just hope to repeat that, I am heading as you said, into my second trimester. And I have a similar due date as our birthday so yeah, we should be hoping for three peat.

Myrna: Yes, yes. From our mouths to God’s ears.

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Motherhood: How to protect your kids from sexual abuse

Keshia: Okay. All right. Well, I’m gonna take this conversation a little bit differently. And I’m going to ask you a question, because at the start of this conversation, you started by saying that Out of the Snares is about you coming out of poverty, sexual abuse, and parents not being in the home. And so, we talked a little bit about the, poverty, we talked a little bit about parents not being in the home. But I’m wanting to hear a bit more about your memories of your, child abuse. And in your book, you also talk about how the memories of that, child abuse, came back to you after I was born.  Can you talk a little bit about that? About that time for you as you had me and those memories of, sexual abuse, came flooding back to you.

And then also maybe you want to give some advice to listeners that have experienced, sexual abuse, and have had daughters and now have to feel like they have to protect their child at all costs.

Myrna: Well, thank you Keshia, it’s a very important conversation to have. So let me start with me and then I will expand it out. I was, sexually abused, by my godfather.  I called him grandfather and I spent a lot of time at his house. So, that is the first problem that contributes to our black and brown babies getting, sexually abused, because apparently in our community it happens a lot. In my experience, it wasn’t a babysitting thing. It was just that, I was always at someone’s house. I was at my aunt’s house, I was at my grandfather’s house and when you’re sleeping over at people’s houses and there is men around, this is basically what happens.

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Mothers also need to protect boys

I read something from Tyler Perry, that was addressing this issue, and he was talking about our community. Most Black mothers don’t have money for a babysitter, so they always have the kids go and stay at the uncle dem house and this person’s house and all that kind of stuff. And this is basically what happens. Kids are being, sexually abused, by people that come to our homes and even boyfriends.  So, getting back to my, child abuse, I didn’t have any trauma attached to it as it was happening because this person was a loved one and I really loved him.

He showered me with gifts, we were poor, and he was rich. So when this experience was going on, I wasn’t traumatized in any way. I mean, I didn’t understand what was going on because it started when I was very young age. I didn’t understand what was going on until I started having boyfriends at 13 and realized, you’ve already had sex. These guys are gonna think that you’re a tramp.

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Transform Your Mind Podcast Player FM

Past sexual abuse trauma resurfaced after birth of child

That started my whole self-respect phase which worked for me because I was never promiscuous. So, it wasn’t very traumatic. When I recognized that it was wrong, I stopped it. There was no big problem. You know what I mean? But then, when you were born, something that I buried came alive and it was very, traumatic. I stopped wanting to have your dad to touch me, I had bad dreams. And whatever it was, clearly it was coming back up. I mean, and it was really an unusual response. Of course, I never went to therapy or anything. I just worked through it, but it started my vigilance of making sure you were not exposed to, sexual abuse.

And my vigilance came with people in my home and where I sent you to sleep over.  Your father and I split up when you were five years old. I made sure that anybody that I’m bringing to the house that I would, make sure I don’t leave you alone with that person.  At one point in time, my sister was living with me, and her husband started bathing you. And I immediately put a stop to that.

So these are the ways that you protect your girl children and boy children, because it’s not only girls now. But you protect them by knowing who they’re coming into contact with.  Our world is becoming really messed up because women are now molesting boys. Tyler Perry, tells a story of how he was molested by a woman and I think even Terry Crews revealed that he was also, sexually assaulted.

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Google Podcast Transform Your Mind

Motherhood: Be careful your kids are always watching

In my book, I share my views on, motherhood, and I believe that, motherhood, you are a role model for your kids. I remember you were always watching me. It was an incredible thing, you didn’t feel comfortable unless you’re in my presence watching and listening, watching and listening. And mothers or fathers, your kids are always listening. They’re always watching. So, you can’t say “Do as I say it, not as I do.” You’ve got to do it. You’ve got to walk the walk. So, I was a role model to you and I taught you things that my mom taught me. For example, to make decisions for yourself.

What do you feel is the role of a mother and how do you plan to embrace, motherhood?

Keshia: Yeah, I mean we’ve talked a lot about protection, I definitely think that the role of the mom is to protect their cub so to speak. When we watch Animal Planet you always see the mother lion protecting her cub and protecting them from harm.

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The role of a mother

So definitely protection is the, role of a mother, as well as all the other things like:

  • Feed your children not only actual physically feeding, but emotionally feeding, feeding their self-confidence,
  • Teaching them to become contributing members of society
  • Helping them to find their purpose
  • Teaching them to love God
  • And how to survive in life
  • To lead by example, kids are always watching. You want to be able to not only say the important things, but show them the important things as well.

So how am I embracing motherhood? I’m still learning, I am just a few months in but yeah, I have been reading books and I am working towards embracing, motherhood.

It still feels weird. You know, hearing my baby’s heartbeat seeing it via ultrasounds. I mean, it just feels different. I can’t even really grasp the words to say like, how does it feel to know that something is living inside of you and living inside of your belly? Right. Something that you have to care for and nurture and protect and be worried for and scared for and love all at the same time. So, it’s very humbling. Maybe that’s the word.

Circle of life continues connection with baby

Myrna: I didn’t hear the word, connection.  Are you connecting to this baby?

Keshia: Thanks for putting me on the spot mom. I don’t know if I would say I am connecting with the baby yet. I don’t feel connected yet. I did have the feeling that morning that it was a girl even though all along I’ve been saying they think it’s a boy. But that morning I did say yeah, you’re a girl. So maybe. Also, the day before I found out that I was pregnant. I said we need a new car and went out and bought a new car that day. Because I’m like we you know, we need a new car for family planning. So, I guess she is speaking to me.

Myrna: She’s sending you those signals. Yes, yes. Amazing. All right. Well, listen, Keshia Morris Desir. You did not disappoint. We had an incredible conversation. Thank you for sharing your, motherhood experience, with me and my audience.  Wishing you the best pregnancy and delivery.

Additional Resources

How To Protect Your Child from Sexual Abuse

 

How to Become Debt Free By Shifting Your Money Mindset

Toyin Crandal Money Mindset

Toyin Crandell, author of the Money Mindset Shift and host of the Millionaire Money Podcast, talks about helping her clients ditch their limiting beliefs about, money, by shifting their, money mindset, design a simple, proven and customized, financial freedom, plan so they can, build wealth, become, debt free, and create a new legacy.

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Bio

Toyin Crandell is the host of the Millionaire Money Podcast, a best-selling author, a financial mentor, an international speaker, and the founder of Money Mindset SHIFT.

She specializes in helping business owners and career professionals ditch their limiting beliefs about, money, design a simple, proven, and customized financial freedom plan so they can build wealth, get rest, and create a new legacy.

She has coached thousands of individuals and families, helping them increase their wealth by $10s of millions of dollars and pay off millions of dollars of debt while enjoying their lives in the process.

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How Toyin Became a money mindset coach

Toyin: I was in full time ministry and I loved what I did. Me and my husband are both professional musicians. That’s how we met. So,  I was like, God is good. Life is good. Who needs, money.  December 2016 we were living in a tiny basement apartment. The apartment was so small. I think our whole apartment fits into my current master bedroom now. It was so small; you had to go sideways and do a shuffle to get some clothes out of the closet. And we had a little six-month-old daughter, I really didn’t care. I didn’t even notice any of these things.

We had our daughter and I remember one evening my husband had brought me dinner in the bedroom. Because we didn’t have a dining space and I’m eating dinner, and I was just like, Baby, where are you? You know, he’s not in the room like there’s nobody else in the house but me and him. So, I said to him come eat over here. And he comes in the room and I’m just casually asking him, what are you having? I was eating some canned stuff. And he said, I am having chocolates and I was like, what do you mean chocolates? And he said Toyin we’re out of food.

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Dinner was canned food and chocolate

I found out that week he had been giving me the rest of our food because I was nursing our daughter. And even the chocolates that he was eating were not chocolates that we bought. It was because it was December it was Christmas season and people had given us a gift of a box of chocolates. So, he was living on that, so I could feed our baby and that was my very first, forceful wakeup call where in my mind I thought to myself, Oh, my gosh, this isn’t working, money, matters.

I started having 1000 thoughts in one second, I’m thinking to myself, we need to be able to feed my daughter. It’s one thing when you’re single and you don’t have food and you can eat rice from January to December. Nobody cares. But now have a daughter that I am responsible for, so I get this wakeup call, what do I do? Me and my husband very resourceful people, I tell him it’s not working. I’ve been watching a ton of webinars. I’ve been listening to all these different things to try to learn from people. And I was not working, else we would have food in the fridge.

So, I get my first coach and this person was a, business strategist, and they helped me to like start thinking more like a business person as opposed to thinking like a Lottie, Dottie person. And I remember in February I had collected $7,000 in cash and I was like oh my goodness, this is the breakthrough we’ve been waiting for.

Myrna: What did you sell to make the $7000?

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Helping people to become debt free

Toyin: I was helping people to become, debt free. So, here’s the funny thing. I had debt in the past and I thought that, debt freedom, was, financial freedom, because I didn’t understand, money. So, I learned how to be, debt free. And I had started teaching it as a business casually, I didn’t even plan it. I just became, debt free. My friends were like, Oh my gosh, you’re, debt free. How did you do it? I Started telling my friends, and they became, debt free. I’m spending all this time talking to people and they’re all becoming, debt free. And I wasn’t getting paid.

So, I was like, I should get paid for this. So that was what had started like me charging for teaching people how to become, debt free. What happened was in the same month where we’re emailing about rent and bills, I get this favor to get into a room with these technical, millionaire mentors. And these are people who are running businesses that are in the hundreds of millions of dollars and

I’m in the room with them learning from them. I started noticing these guys they don’t talk like me, I started noticing so many little things. And I realized that I had been in so many circles. We prided ourselves on our, struggle. I get in this room with these actual, millionaires. And one of the men had this chart and it started with:

  • struggle,
  • survival,
  • sustained success,
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Shifting your money mindset from struggle

He asked us in the room, where are you on this ladder? And like earlier that year he met me in February have been like at least I mean, sustained success, but at this point, I am under, struggle, again. And I just remember thinking to myself, if I don’t figure out what is holding me back financially, I will always be under, struggle.

I realized that the problem isn’t to be, debt free, because I had become, debt free. I was, debt free. But the problem was my mind was so against having, money, that even though our expenses was the lowest you could imagine. We reduced our income to be lower than even those expenses, because we were so used to, struggle.

Myrna: I teach that all the time. Let’s label this, mindset. It’s called a, poverty mindset.

Toyin: That’s exactly right. That means no matter what actions you take, you produce, poverty. And in that month, I create this process. So now let me talk about how we got to 11 streams of income. I create this process where I just started asking myself questions. I got honest with myself on a level that I had never been honest with myself before. I asked myself:

  • What are the limiting beliefs I have about, money?
  • What is my actual relationship with, money?
  • What am I doing wrong?
  • What is my pattern with, money?
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Podfriend Transform Your Mind Podcast

Why shifting your money mindset works

So now I see the problem and I create this shift process. I didn’t know anything about neuroscience back then. I didn’t know anything about, mindset coaching.  I just knew I was sick and tired of, struggle. So, I use this process for myself. I never thought I would even tell anybody about it.

The next month, November, we had more income. And my husband pointed out to me, he’s like, hey, you just had more, money, come in, in November this month, than all of last year combined. And he says to me, what are you doing? Do you have a new offer? Do you have a new business like what are you doing that I didn’t hear about? Honestly, I was shocked. I hadn’t looked at the numbers from that frame.

And I said to him the only thing I did was change my, mindset. I thought to ask myself, I wonder if this mind process would work for my clients because I haven’t taught them anything about mindset. It was all strategy and our success rate because our success rate was around 50%. The industry average ranges between 3% to 50%.

In coaching, our success was 60. I used to be proud of that. But I used to be so frustrated about the remaining 40%.  Why were these 40% still in poverty? When I started teaching, money mindset, our success rate went to 95%, our people start scaling and becoming, millionaires.

In the process of up leveling my mind every single year, I’m honest about this. I am a human being I still have, money mindset, challenges, the difference is the level.

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Transform Your Mind Luminary podcast
Transform Your Mind Luminary podcast

Becoming a millionaire by shifting your money mindset

Myrna: You’re no longer scratching the bottom.

Toyin: I remember it took us from $60,000 a year to 130,000 a year to 600,000 a year to over a million in a year, so we were growing every single year. I would literally sit my butt down with my process and say, Okay, what’s the new level? What’s the new identity that God is calling me to operate in. Because guys, money, is never just about the numbers.  When I set goals, when I push and when you want to push, you’re not doing it just because of the, money;  money itself is neutral. It means nothing.

All it is a marker of the value that you are bringing to the world and you are allowing yourself to receive. And so, I realized the more people I can serve this, money, thing is just a way for me to see how many people am I helping? How many people am I making into, millionaires, or whatever the goal is.  I’m a finance person naturally, as soon as the, money mindset, got figured out, we were off. We now have 11 streams of income.  We’ve got real estate properties, you’ve got dividends, we’ve got stocks, we’ve got royalties, we do workshops, plus, passive income.

Transform Your Mind PTWWN TV
Transform Your Mind PTWWN TV – Become a Master of Your Money 

Passive income streams

So, we have, passive income, streams and active income streams, but all of it came out of one thing one thing a, money mindset.   Start your income making machine, you need an income making machine that allows you to do all the other fun things that you want to do. What your income making machine will not produce unless you face your, money mindset.

So, unless you look at your, money mindset, and allow yourself to be able to get to a level you’ve never been you are not going to become a, millionaire.  We coach people who are, millionaires, and we coach people who have not worked a job in eight years and the conversation may be different, but we are training the subconscious.

Shifting our money mindset

Myrna: So how do we shift our, money mindset?

Toyin: Okay, the first thing that you want to do is you need to get honest with yourself about what’s not working. If you cannot be honest with yourself about what’s not working in your finances, you will never fix it. And this is actually the hardest part, being honest with yourself. Most people never want to do that because it sucks to look in the mirror.

And so, the first thing that you guys want to do is to get your, money, right.  You have to sit down with a pen and a paper and write down what are the patterns that I am seeing happening In my life that are giving me clues. The, money mindset shift, is simply follow the money.

So, for example, if you have a savings account, and your savings account, never crosses 5k, some of you guys you’re doing very well your savings account may never cross 100K.  You get what I mean? Like everyone has those limits, where were the ones that never crossed 55 bucks.

Google Podcast Transform Your Mind
Google Podcast Transform Your Mind

What’s your money pattern?

When there is a pattern, we often get lost in the story. The reason my account never got past $500 was because my fridge broke down. The reason was because I chose to go and shop this time.  The stories will always be different but I don’t look at the story, I look at the pattern. What is the pattern, the pattern is when you hit $500 your money disappears.

So right now, what are the patterns that I am noticing in my, money?  I will save this specifically for those of you who earn a higher amount than people around you, you are in one of the most dangerous positions financially. Why? Because when we work with a lot of, millionaires, and we find that because you are doing better than most people, everyone around you is super impressed.

They’re like, Oh my gosh, Look at your income. And a lot of these people don’t notice whether or not, money, is staying. Yes, you’re working hard. Yes, you’re bringing in bank. Yes, you’re making the dollars; But you’re not building generational wealth. You’re not keeping any of it. You’re not keeping it. But once you shift your, mindset, you have to take action.

Book money mindset shift
Book: Money Mindset Shift

Toyin’s book Money Mindset Shift

Myrna: I know you just started your podcast. Tell our readers how they could connect with you.

I’m the host of the Millionaire Money Podcast. It is so much fun. We just teach business owners and career professionals how to think like a, millionaire, make wealthy decisions and take strategic action so that you can actually create the, millionaire, bank account and lifestyle that you want. So, our goal in that podcast is literally helping you to get your first $100 million dollars.  We’re going to be taking you to the next level. So that’s the podcast.

And then the second thing is some of you guys may be saying, I’m ready to shift this brain of mine, I am ready to actually begin to live out the wealth that I’m looking for. For those of you guys you can go to www.moneymindsetshift.ca and you’re able to watch a free master class. Now we have two master classes. One of them is for everybody, and the other one is specifically for business owners who are currently at six to seven figures. So, if you’re thinking seven figures is a masterclass for you. And if you’re a career professional or business owner and looking to earn your first million then the second master class is for you.

Additional Resources

Is True Wealth Financial Freedom?

 

How to Play to Win with the Cards you are Dealt in Life

play to win the game of life

We should, play to win. I wrote the book “Out of the Snares, a story of Hope and Encouragement” with the intention of drawing, life lessons, from various aspects of my Life and how I, played to win.  For example the first life event that I introduced in my book is as a victim of childhood, sexual abuse, and being born into, poverty.

The, life lesson, I share here is that of the, victim mentality.

You don’t have to be a, victim, in life; instead become a player.

 

Just like in the game of blackjack, if the dealer is showing a picture card and you only have small cards, you don’t chuck your hand in and say there’s no way that I can win.
You must, play to win. All you need is the intention to win and guess what, your hand is going to get better.

Quitters Never Win and Winners Never Quit

 

Here is a short excerpt from my book:

Out of the Snares a story of hope and encouragement

Intro How to Play to Win – My story

I was born into a family with nothing, my mother and grandmother were both domestic servants. My dad was in Teachers College and did not know his real father. He lived with his mom and stepfather who was an alcoholic. In 1959 Guyana was a British colony of England.
Just like England colonized India and took all the wealth out of India, in a similar way England took all of Guyana’s resources out of the country.
Most of the Blacks and Indians were living in, poverty. My mom and grandmother worked for white English folk.

As a child I was always fed and had clothes and shoes to wear. My mom and grandmother both made our clothes.
So, it was understandable that I would be drawn to my godfather, who was a wealthy man with several houses, several cars and a corner shop filled with snacks and chocolate bars. Mr. Clark as I will call him took a liking to me beyond that of a Godfather and treated me like his grandchild.

I spent a lot of time at his house. He took me out with his family every weekend and really showered me with things.
He gave me food, gold chains and gold bracelets, he was also a goldsmith. I ended up sleeping over at his house several times per week and playing with his grandchildren. He used to like to bounce me on his knee with his legs massaging my private parts.

One day my memory recalls, I was about five years old, he braced me up against the wall and caressed my body. As I got older the, sexual abuse, became more intimate.
He would rub my legs whenever I was close. His favorite was the feeling me up in the front seat of his car while driving me to school.

His hand would be under my skirt fingering my private parts. I was sure that people in other cars could see this, sexual abuse, but he said they could not.
This, childhood sexual abuse,  continued for several years until one day he took me behind his shop and took my virginity with his fingers.

I didn’t tell anyone I’m not sure why. I do remember thinking that I loved him so much and wanted to die before he did.

Mr. Clark started getting a reputation for liking little girls and my dad asked me one day if Mr. Clark ever, sexual abused, me, I lied and said he had not.

I’m going to skip a couple of paragraphs, I don’t want to get into the nitty-gritty details here.
I’m going to read to you now my conclusion of this chapter.

Play to Win by collapsing your consciousness

How did I, play to win? Looking back, if I were to collapse my consciousness and become the observer in this experience, I would say that at some subconscious level I knew what we were doing was wrong. I knew that I was being, sexually abused.
I’m not sure why I chose to keep it a secret.

Research shows that children of, childhood sexual abuse, never tell, they become ashamed and feel that they are to blame. I know I have always felt shamed. It took me a very, very, long time to share my story. Writing this book was my way of coming into the light and putting the devil on notice that I will no longer let guilt and shame be a part of my life.

That was my introduction to my book.
Pick up a copy to read the full story.

Playing to Win Using CANI

I have, played to win,  the, sexual abuse, card and, poverty, by concentrating on, CANI. Constant and Never Ending Improvement.
They say that the secret to happiness is always moving towards a goal and that is how I, play to win.

It is wonderful that we’re meeting today in a library because I have always been a reader.
Reading books is how you, play to win!

Tony Robbins is now a billionaire because he made himself read 700 books per year and those books taught him everything he knows.
Pat Riley of the Miami Heat said

“If you’re not growing, you are dying”

Play to win using vibrational frequency

The second way I have, played to win, with the cards I have been dealt was to become conscious of my vibrational frequency.
I learned that later in life before I wrote my first book
“Becoming Conscious, my awakening”

I started understanding my vibrations. You see whenever somebody does something to us, we feel bad and what happens when we feel bad?
We attract more of the same. We always say bad things comes in three’s, that is because you are attracting them to you.
So when you’re in a funk you have to find some way to make yourself feel better, and one of the ways I do that is to always live in gratitude.
Because regardless of what’s going on in your life, there’s always something that you can be grateful for. Breath, sight, food in your fridge, etc.
So, find some gratitude and feel that energy release a positive force that reverses all the bad in your life!

Survivors of, sexual abuse, don’t owe anyone our stories. Here’s why I’m telling mine, MeToo
Click this link to hear a similar story
https://www.latimes.com/opinion/opinion-la/la-oe-warnke-metoo-sexual-violence-20171016-story.html

Genese Vertus Playing to Win 

In 2009 at the age of 33 Genese became CEO and founder of Passion Rescue Mission and reopened the Genecoit Vertus School of Excellence in Francois, Haiti providing tuition free education and serving over 225 students.

Genese How Have you played with the cards you were dealt in Life?
Winning has to less with the cards you have in your hand and more to do with how you play the game.

You have to, play to win.

How did I, play to win? I was born in one of the poorest countries in the Western Hemisphere, which is Haiti.

The goal is to win no matter what seven piece of dominoes or cards you have in your hand.

Kenny Rogers sings a song that says

“You have to know when to Hold and when to Fold”

Three simple things helped me play with my cards.
1. My faith in God
2. Pursuit of an education
3. A strong support system

I was fortunate enough to come to this great country to get an education and in 2009 I returned back to Haiti and reopened a school that my father built. We started with 189
students at that time currently we have 225 students getting a tuition-free education in one of the poorest, mountainous, villages in Haiti, which is Francois Haiti. We provide meals, we provide school supplies we provide uniforms and we have 12 teachers that are employed.

I have a waiting list of over 300 students wanting to get into that school right now; so it’s not enough To, play to win, we must give back. Once you get to where you need to be, you need to
reach back and help your people.
If you need information on making a donation
Please visit www.passionrescuemission.org </a

Jenny Wang Playing to Win 

Jenny is passionate about helping people improve Performance through holistic learning. She is a Professional Certified Coach and a Senior Learning and Program Manager at Nutranext, which is the healthiest employer in the US. Jenny is also a Certified Health Coach and co-author of Bringing Mindfulness to Your Workplace. Jenny and I worked together at Office Depot. She was my mentor at Toastmasters, then she became my Coachee as she worked on finding her purpose. I’m Sure she has found her purpose.

Jenny – I have had some good cards. But there are some cards we cannot choose. We cannot chose our Father we cannot choose our Mother or our relatives.
I was born and raised in China in a very traditional family. I don’t have trauma in my life, my parents are very lovely and educated; but there’s one thing that we never agreed on. When I got married I never thought I wanted children.

I don’t know how many of you are natural parents; but I was not one of them. When I was at 34 years old my father called me from China had a big argument with me. He wanted to have a grandchild. So, How did I, play to win? I chose to honor my father’s request because family is important to me.

Now eight years later, people ask me what was the best decision I’ve ever made in my life? And I say “To have a child” My son has brought me so much joy, so much wonderful
things to my life that I have never ever thought that I would have.

The second card everyone has, but they also cannot chose is
Passion and purpose.

The 3rd card we are dealt is  Health. The most important thing for everybody is good health. I decided to take the journey of being a, Yoga Instructor, and a Health Coach.

I learned we can become happy by changing how we move our bodies. Yoga, encourages us to think about our health.
No matter how busy you are, no matter how much outside achievement you have, by the end of the day you have to take time for yourself.

I hope you enjoyed this presentation both audio and written. Now I need something from you.
Support Passion Rescue Mission by making a donation.
Subscribe to this podcast and leave a review. And don’t forget about sharing this podcast. I am sure you know at least one person who could benefit from the information shared here today.

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Additional Resources

 

https://blog.myhelps.us/how-to-win-at-the-game-of-life/