How to Write Your Own Hollywood Ending

Hollywood ending life story

A lot of times if you believe it and pray about it your, Hollywood movie, will turn out exactly the way that you want it to be. If we use our imagination, we can create our, Hollywood ending. Think of that bad job you are in and create your, Hollywood movie, with your own, Hollywood ending with you in your dream job, in your dream relationship and your dream family.  First you must have the baseline of, self-awareness, then you use your imagination to write the script. Where do I want to get to, what’s my goal?  You are the Director, Producer and star of your Life Movie.

My guest today is Linda Flanders, Author of “Hollywood Endings and How to Get One”

Years ago, my pastor preached a message that when we’re born there is a blank page.  We have a beginning, and we have an ending and in the middle we are supposed to write our story. We are the director of our life movie, producer and the Star in our, Hollywood ending.

Listen to the full interview Here 

Writing your Hollywood Ending

Yes, you can create what you want with imagination an intention. The movie themes the world loves are few and simple; they are the themes that have been portrayed over and over since Hollywood began to make movies. These classics have the most wonderful endings: love overcomes all; good defeats evil; the wayward child comes home. Anyone can be a hero, and everyone has a Guardian Angel.

Hollywood Endings – Using Imagination and Intention is about self-awareness, recovery and enlightenment. It’s for anyone who has ever wanted or dreamed of having a “Hollywood ending.” It is for those of us who never had a role model to show us how it’s done. It celebrates the wonder of the movies and urges us to see movies once to be entertained, and then return to see them again to learn from them. We all deserve a Hollywood ending. This book can show you how with life lessons from Dances With Wolves, National Velvet, Die Hard, and The Color Purple, to name a few.

Book: Hollywood endings How to get one
Book: Hollywood endings How to get one

Rewrite your own story and give it a Hollywood ending.

Linda has been a, FeldenKrais, practitioner for 30 years and an independent video producer. Flanders and her sister Dr Dorothy Halla-Poe created the, matrix model, an innovative way to work with children’s atypical behavior and, learning disabilities.  They specialized in using the, filmmaking, process as a learning and teaching tool, focusing on projects that are educational and promote social and personal change.

Myrna – I love the idea of using the, Hollywood movie, and, filmmaking, process as a learning tool to help children with, learning disabilities.  Can you share how that works.

Linda – I am a, Feldenkrais, practitioner and have been for 30 years and while that particular mode of learning has to do with learning, self-awareness, and learning through options.  I started working with young children who needed physical therapy and occupational therapy; but their behavior was such that they were absolutely out of control and scared the, physical therapist, on the, occupational therapist.

I started working with children behavior focusing specifically on self-awareness and self-control. If we have those two things, we can pretty much guide our own, Hollywood ending. If we do not have them, then we are vulnerable to so many awful things that can happen in our life.  If we cannot control ourselves and become the, Director, in our own, Hollywood movie, somebody else is going to control us.

 

I started using making, movies, as a fun activity with children and what I found was that even with multiple, psychiatric labels, attached to them and very bizarre behaviors, they all listened to the, director, if they played a part in a, movie.

 

When they had a camera in their face and the, director, said do this; they did it without hesitation. No attitude or behavioral issues. The children also loved watching themselves over and over in their, Hollywood movie. Science has shown that kids watching themselves act a certain way reinforces new neural pathways in their brain of new behavior.

Soundcloud Transform your mind podcast
Transform your Mind Soundcloud podcast

The, Feldenkrais method, is an educational way of learning to teach self-awareness.

Myrna – I understand the behavioral piece in making a, Hollywood movie; but I don’t understand how making a, movie, helps children with, learning disabilities.

Linda – In making our, Hollywood movie, I had them freeze for the camera while I ran around with the camera to a different angle, because that’s how a, Hollywood movie,  is made.

The children had to be in the, present moment, and they had to control themselves from the inside out. That is the huge piece of, self-control, and if they can gain, self-control, then they’ve got a better opportunity in school to be able to learn the different topics that they needed to learn.

In making a, Hollywood movie, they became much more aware of themselves and what they could do and what they couldn’t do. When they fell apart and got angry or sad or wanted to be the star of the, Hollywood movie, those issued had to be worked out during the filming of the, movie.

Myrna – That’s great and innovative. I hope teachers who are listening will take some cues from you because now we all can make, Hollywood movies, with our cell phones!

Hollywood Endings and How to Get One

Let’s transition into your book.  You wrote the book “Hollywood Endings and How to Get One” Tell us what would you like the readers to walk away with after reading your book.

Linda – Absolutely, it is a, self-help book, or a, self-improvement book. It teaches, mindfulness, helps with raising, self-awareness, on topics like “are you happy” “are you content with your job” etc.

The book teaches the science of, mindfulness, of paying attention to the moment, so you are fully present. In the science world this is called, neuroplasticity.  Change your brain, change your life.

If we use our imagination, we can create our, Hollywood ending. You think of that bad job you are in and create your, Hollywood movie, with your own, Hollywood ending. First you must have the baseline of, self-awareness, then you use your imagination to write the script. Where do I want to get to, what’s my goal?

Transform Your Mind iHeart Radio
iHeart Radio

Your Hollywood Ending doesn’t have to be romantic

The idea of the, Hollywood ending, is not necessarily a romantic one, it could be any goal you have. If you reach that goal that’s a, Hollywood ending.

Myrna – When you were talking my mind went directly to the, Hollywood movie, Pretty Woman.

The movie started with the words, Hollywood, where dreams were made, anything is possible in, Hollywood! It ended with the same words.

But in the movie specifically Julia Roberts had a dream. She had a dream of her own, Hollywood ending.   She actually told Richard Gere in the movie hey “all the time I was dreaming you about my Prince Charming, I would dream I would be locked up into this room in this castle and the prince would climb up and he would rescue me. Nowhere in my, Hollywood ending, did he say I’m going to put you up in a condo as my mistress.

It’s really true, if you’ve got a goal and you’ve got a dream of your movie of life having a, Hollywood ending, it’s very hard for someone to knock you off of it.  Which is why she didn’t accept that offer which she said was a good offer for a girl like her.

She had gained, self-awareness, in that whole process of being a highly paid call girl for a week.

Linda – In the book I do explain the three systems of the brain.  I’m not a, neuroscientist;  but the information’s out there,  I  simply simplified it.

The Brain Systems

  1. The producer brain, because without a producer you don’t have a, Hollywood movie. The producer brain is the, reptilian brain, and that keeps us breathing. It keeps our heart beating. So, we don’t have a lot of control over that one
  2. The, limbic system, is the home of the emotions and we can live there we can, but we can also get stuck there. You can become a drama queen always reacting to life instead of working in the direction we want to go.
  3. The cerebral cortex, the Director brain. That’s where we plan, where we use our own judgment, where we use our common sense, our reasoning.

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There’s another movie that Julia Roberts was in called “Sleeping with the Enemy” where she is in a very abusive domestic violence situation.  I talk about that movie in my book, because if you can’t leave a situation, you can watch that movie and get ideas to leave your situation.

In the, Hollywood movie, she planned her escape. She learnt to swim, she selected her disguises so her husband could not find her, she picked a place that she would live. She imagined her, Hollywood ending. She set all the pieces in order first, then she made her escape and that’s what I’m teaching in the book.  We could use, Hollywood movies, and our imagination to write our own, Hollywood ending.

Myrna – So you want readers to walk away with the vision that they can direct their lives. They can plan it out, they can be a director, the producer of their own lives, because their life is like a, Hollywood movie.

Linda – Yes, each chapter there is a list of a few things to do. The first one is go watch a, Hollywood movie, but I want you to watch this movie through this lens, so that you’re watching the movie from a different perspective.  You’re gaining awareness from watching that movie. For example in the, Hollywood movie, Die Hard, with Bruce Willis.

In that movie there are places where Bruce Willis is so emotionally distraught, that he’s not thinking.  He throws some C4 down an elevator chute without recognizing that it’s gonna explode and where’s that explosion gonna come?  It’s gonna come right back up the chute into his face. That’s an example of us doing something without thinking of the consequences which blows up in our face.

Myrna – I don’t know much about movies or directing, but I know as a, Life coach, I always teach that we’re the director of our own lives, because we make the decisions and direct our choices.

What is the FeldenKrais Method

One of the things within, Feldenkrais model, is taught through movement.  We teach awareness, options and choice, but these lessons are taught through the avenue of movement.  One of the classic lessons in the, Feldenkrais, community is called a pelvic clock. It’s the ability to get your pelvis moving in all the different directions of a clock.  It’s better to be able to move a little bit in all these directions than a whole lot just one way, so it’s definitely the opposite of one-way thinking.

In my work with children I teach them how to create a clock from clay. They have to make the clock and they have to make the one, two, three, four all the way to twelve.  Then they have to make a little person and put the person in the center of the clock.  The idea what if you altered your behavior just a little bit. Just a little bit to move to the next number on the clock.  Step by step by step. You don’t have to stop doing something just change it a little bit.

It could be drug use, overeating or alcohol in adults. The idea is its okay if you can’t completely stop drinking but can you cut back a little bit with awareness. If you can’t make a small change, then you become aware that you have a real problem.

It’s this intertwining of movement and thinking with our emotions that get tied up in this knot and through the Feldenkrais method of movement and awareness you can break those up and then make small changes.  Transformation comes faster because you’ve incorporated movement as well as thinking and emotions.

FeldenKrais Method uses movement to achieve change 

Myrna – Yes that is the mind and body connection as taught in Yoga.

Linda – If we want to become the director in our own, Hollywood movie, then this is simply a way that we can do it.  Shakespeare said that “the whole world is a stage and we’re just actors on it”

Myrna – In this day and age everybody’s got a camera, people are making big money just recording on their smart phones. You do not need the big fancy movie camera to record your own, Hollywood movie.

 

Free Feldenkrais Summit

From May 1st through May 10th there is a free online Feldenkrais summit that you want to invite our listeners and TV audience.

It’s an international summit, so for those whole two weeks you have presentations that come from, Feldenkrais, practitioners around the world who have taken their work and specialized in it.  You can learn about using this method to help with trauma. There is trauma from anyone who is victimized and has been traumatized.

Some have taken, Feldenkrais, into working with world-class athletes and top performers.

Some have taken it literally into working with animals. Linda Tellington Jones can do amazing things with animals.

I took it into behavior, so it could be applied in a whole bunch of different ways.

So, the summit has all these different international speakers. It is literally 24 hours of

Feldonkrais, awareness through movement.

It’s all free so it’s an opportunity for people to experience the, Feldenkrais method, and break up those muscular patterns so you can feel better. Because when you move better, you can feel better.

 

Register on www.feldenkraissummit.com

Conclusion

In closing a, Hollywood movie, I am going to suggest everybody go watch the, Hollywood movie, Baby Boom with Diane Keaton because in an instant she a New York executive and literally overnight she becomes a single parent of a toddler who had lost her parents.

She took the circumstances of her life and created her own, Hollywood ending.

It you found this content inspirational, Please remember to subscribe and leave a review on iTunes.  You are invited to join my private Facebook Group called “Lifecoach

Additional Resources

 

Using Z-isms and Life Lessons for Personal Growth

Z-isms life lessons for personal growth

A, life lesson, can be defined as something from which useful knowledge or principles for, personal growth, can be learned. When I was growing up my grandmother had a lot of these, life lessons,  and principles. One of them was you can lead a horse to the water but you can’t make him drink!  Today we are going to be talking about, Z-isms.  If you don’t know what these are, download the audio.

Listen to the full episode here:

 

  • My guest today is Matt Zinman called a difference-maker,  devoted to personally enrich the lives of at least 100 million people by 2025. His new book, Z-isms: Insights to Live By” is based on his experiences as an entrepreneur, athlete, single parent, caregiver and nonprofit founder. Matt is also the host of “Insights to Live By,” a podcast that invites guests to share their own pearls of wisdom. In addition, Matt is CEO of The Internship Institute, which he established in 2007 to “Make Experience Matter.”
book Z-isms life lessons to live by
book Z-isms life lessons to live by

 

Introduction to Z-isms or life lessons

One of your, life lessons, is about, self-discovery, and mindset. So what are, Z-isms?

Matt – A, Z-ism, is a, life lesson, a filter in how it is that we experience the world around us.  One of the which is, mood, health. I think everyone recognizes that pessimism and optimism apply to the very same set of circumstances. If you’re having that kind of a down day you could just as well be seeing something differently than if you were having an up day; so recognizing where you are in your, mood,  health at any given time is one filter.

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Another principle of, life lessons, is  are you staying present or are you caught up in worry about the future. Maybe you’re worrying about something that isn’t certain to happen or you keep running something through your head that already happened that continues to just spiral and drag you down and change your, mood.

It’s important to recognize that you are in the, present moment, and grounding yourself in, gratitude, is very key. Then there’s perception itself and recognizing that you may not get it all right; but that is okay. We’re not all the best listeners all the time we could be distracted.

Gratitude is the best life lesson for Personal Growth

Myrna – A lot a lot of people start their mornings with a, gratitude meditation, because if you have, gratitude, for the smallest number of things then it is good. It doesn’t have to be that your dream job or dream relationship is happening.  We all have goals and we all have dreams. You might be depressed because you’re not where you want to be in life; but if you can just be, grateful, for what you have now, then you are enhancing your, personal growth.

Louise Hay has a, gratitude meditation, on YouTube that I do a few times per week.

It’s really basic being, grateful, that you have electricity, that you have a stove that you can cook on, gratitude, that you have indoor plumbing! Etc. There’s so many things that we can be, grateful, for.

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Matt – Your point about, gratitude, is so spot-on right we hear about it so much and there’s a reason that, gratitude, works. It’s really at that heart of life enrichment. It is the premier, life lesson.

If you do that, gratitude meditation, for just two minutes in the morning and before bed, for 30 days straight, I guarantee it will change your life.

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Beware of the Spiders life lesson

Myrna – Let’s talk about, spiders. One of your unusual topics in your book involves being aware of, spiders. You describe, spiders, as people who manipulate and drain others. Why did you call them, spiders, because I call those people leeches.  They suck you, what does, spiders, have to do with draining you?  Tell me the concept there?

Matt – Spiders, do have quite a bite.  If you really take inventory of the people who were in your orbit, it’s pretty easy to go down that list and recognize that person we choose to be vulnerable with. We don’t want to put energy into always having to be on guard.

It takes a lot more energy to be devious than it does to be oblivious. For the, spider, they must remember their lies. When you’re living the life of a manipulator or devious person, it doesn’t come naturally you’ve got to plan it out.

You really need to tune into your Spidey senses  to recognize that someone is trying to get you to do something you prefer not to do; but they know you can’t say no. We talked about people pleasers. They are the perfect person for the, spider, to manipulate.

Myrna – So you call them, spiders, because they suck, they’re devious and  because they weave webs and  set traps, understood.

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Matt – Spiders, are also energy vampires, very needy people who are always around wanting your time and energy.

You really need to take a closer look at that person and decide whether they belong in your inner circle. A, spider, is going to spin a web and set traps for you.

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What kind of, z-isms, or , life lessons, do you coach?

Matt – I usually start with teaching, self-kindness.  It comes back to valuing yourself and if you value yourself first, the rest comes naturally. Relying on that guiding principle around, self-kindness, you just cannot go wrong.

Self-kindness, is the is the escape hatch when you are caught in the, spider, web. If you get yourself caught in a, spider, web and you’re being manipulated, if think of yourself and think about the wars that you’ve won and you feel, gratitude,  or all these things can power you to change the situation.

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Conclusion Z-isms Life Lessons

Myrna –  What can readers get from the book after they’ve read it?

Matt – I want my readers to understand earned confidence and become aware of, spiders, and things around them

  • energy management,
  • entrepreneurship,
  • concepts around inevitability to a degree the law of attraction
  • and gratitude in life.

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Whether you believe in the law of attraction or not, it has less to do with it as it does acting on things that come your way.

I tell personal stories throughout the book on the, life lessons, I have learned that I think will resonate with readers.

Additional Resources

7 Strategies to Personal Growth

How to be Happy with Less

Finding Beauty in your now

What does it take to be happy? We live in a culture where, happiness, is largely based on external forces – like what we get and what we achieve. And when our life conditions don’t match our expectations, we experience pain and fear, we suffer. But imagine what it would feel like to create a constant sense of inner peace and freedom, and live each day in a beautiful state of, happiness.

Listen to the podcast here:

What’s preventing you from, happiness, and living a life of peace and joy?

Do you believe that others make you happy or are responsible for your, happiness? I used to think so.  Until I realized that the definition of, happiness, is true.  Happiness, is moving in the direction of your goals and dreams. So because my, happiness, comes from my thoughts and actions, I take away the responsibility of my spouse, friends, co-workers being responsible for my, happiness.

I encourage you to Discover what’s holding you back from being happy. Tap into finding inner peace through meditation and mindfulness that you can use to start living in the, present moment. Happiness, is only found in the present moment. Not in the future or the past. This is the time to sit with your feelings of, unhappiness, pain and regret and maybe find the lesson in them.

Once you sit with pain and, unhappiness, and not try to mask it with drugs, food or any of the things you do to not feel your pain, you can step into the unknown, and allow life to unfold in the beautiful way it is meant to.

https://blog.myhelps.us/how-to-find-happiness-in-2017/

How to be Happy in life,  in the present moment

One of the ways I live in the, present moment, is I become aware of the little things that is taking away my, happiness.  The small irritations like my husband not answering the phone when I call or my kids leaving the house and saying where they are going.

Learn, how to be happy in life, in the, present moment. No one is responsible for your, happiness. If you live in the present moment then the hurts from the past can’t bother you.  I remember when Jennifer Gardner was being interviewed about the betrayal of Ben Aflac. He had cheated on her and they were separated and there was a big scandal.  Jennifer tried to stay in the, present moment, and be thankful for her 4 kids. She also said that Ben was not responsible for her, happiness. She alone is responsible for her, happiness.

Great lesson because when we give our power away, people will always trample on us.  Life gives sand life takes away.  The trick to, happiness, is not to be attached to the outcome.

3 Ways to Find Happiness After a Divorce

How to be happy in life, by relaxing and releasing

When I feel the, unhappiness, or irritation coming on me, I practice R&R  relax and release. When you feel that unwanted frustration you relax breathe deeply and release blow it out. Breathe deeply and blow it out through your mouth.

I learnt this in therapy.  When a situation makes you, unhappy, and you don’t attend to the hurt or pain.  We stuff it down. We are not aware of what we are doing but we are hard wired to move away from pain and move towards pleasure, so when we feel pain or, unhappiness, we run from it.

So we self medicate with drugs, alcohol, food, sex, or whatever is around.  In that way, we bury the pain.  Whenever something is in the vicinity of this pain, we feel this tension in our gut because that is where we stored this pain.  We begin to be, unhappy and we are not even sure why so we again stuff it down with drugs, alcohol, food and sex.  We never want to feel.

To stop this cycle.  Whenever you feel this feeling.  Don’t try to stuff down instead relax into it.  Feel the pain, sit with it. Then breathe.  Breathe to relax into it and then breathe it out. Try it next time some external situation makes you, unhappy.

5 Ways to Radiate on the Happiness Wheel

How to be Happy in life, with Less

In the, pursuit of happiness, material things such as money, a big house, fame, or fancy cars do not make us happy.  Instead we need to first love and accept ourselves to be happy.  Money or fame magnifies our, unhappiness, because now you are not sure who your friends are and you become obsessed about keeping this wealth.

How to be happy in life, with less is learning to find happiness in relationships, with family, with health, with being alive.

Daily habits to find, happiness 
  1. Smile. You tend to smile when you’re happy. …
  2. Exercise. Exercise isn’t just for your body, it is for the mind.  It releases endorphins for, happiness.
  3. Get plenty of sleep, serotonin, the feel good hormone is released during sleep.  That is why we are bitchy and, unhappy, with lack of sleep.
  4. Eat with the, pursuit of happiness, in mind. …
  5. Be grateful. Gratitude is the forerunner to, happiness.  You can’t be, unhappy, if you are feeling, gratitude
  6. Give a compliment – giving a compliment makes other happy and that is turn makes you happy.  Happiness, is serving others.
  7. Breathe deeply. – breathing deeply releases tension in our muscles and relaxes the body.
  8. Acknowledge the unhappy moments – don’t try to stuff them down or ignore them. They are already here. Acknowledge them and let them know you see them and that this too shall pass. You will be able to look back at these moments and laugh one day.