How to Rewrite Your Life Story and Achieve Organizational Wellness

Rewrite your life story

When you rewrite your, life story, you can start living on purpose.  You can then transcend the negative stuff from your story all the things that makes you uncomfortable. When you do this as a leader, you can then show up in your organization as your best self and that contributes to, organizational wellness.

My guest today is Sam Morris, Managing Director and chief Culture Officer at Five to Flow LLC, a global collective that builds integrative, organizational wellness, solutions designed to achieve and sustain, peak performance.

Listen to the full interview Here:

Coach Myrna Life Story

I want to start off by sharing my, life story.

I decided to think about my, life story, I realized that as a youth I didn’t identify with my, life story.

My, life story, is that I was born in a very poor Third World Country, Guyana. My mother and father didn’t have much. Both my grandmother and my mom were domestic servants. During that time, I was also, sexually abused.

I never identified with that, story, because somehow God put in my heart and spirit all of the things that I was good at an early age.  I was good in school, I had a great personality, teachers liked me etc. Now that I’m a, life coach, in the personal development space, trying to motivate and inspire others;  the, story, that I tell myself now is that I was born for greater things.

The, life story, of my birth to me is just basically like Jesus, we were both born in poverty and lack in order to transform you into a spiritual teacher.

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Helping Men Rewrite their Life Story

Myrna – Sam you mentioned that you help men overcome their, life stories, traumas, and blocks to be the men the world need them to be.  I’m assuming that you have a, life story, that somehow parallels this, because we have to go through something before you can help other people do the same.

What is your, life story?

Sam – My, life story, is that I was born with my umbilical cord wrapped around my neck, so I couldn’t breathe. From birth to almost 30 years of my life, I was extremely sick.  I had severe food allergies, actually a long list of food allergies. People say that I was allergic to basically everything except water and air; but then a therapist affectionately pointed out to me that actually I was allergic to air, because I also had asthma!

There was a period in my mother’s womb when she thought she had cancer, she didn’t know she was pregnant.  So my energies and my soul and my spirit were immediately put into fighting to survive mode.

As a child and adult, self-love, was not a part of my vocabulary or thought process. I had this idea that I needed to fight for breath and also fight for love.

Overcoming Your Life Story

My, life story, became that in order to be loved, someone had to save me. People were constantly having to save me from my asthma attacks and choking, and this saving mentality got imprinted on my heart as this is what love looks like.

If I am in a relationship with a woman, friend, parents or family member, I believed that for anyone to show me that they loved me they have to somehow save me.

Later in life, I battled addiction from my early 20s into my late 30s.  Really hardcore destructive addiction.

So my, life story, of being needing to be saved was very detrimental and destructive to me and that is why I coach men on how to rewrite their, life story.

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Your Life Story and Organizational Wellness

Myrna – How does rewriting your, life story, help with organizational, wellness, and, peak performance?

Sam – Your story, is important in, organizational culture. The, culture, is where I focus all my all my energies on.  Five to Flow focuses on the, organizational culture, because a culture of, inclusivity, allows an organization to thrive.  By, inclusivity, I mean the whole, diversity and inclusion, conversation. The, inclusion, I’m talking about here is the, culture, of feeling safe, allowing your employees to be creative, to be innovative, to show up for work as their best self!

When you rewrite your, life story, around I’m living my purpose, I’m transcending the negative stuff.  I’m transcending my negative story, I’m transcending that, lifestory, that keeps me uncomfortable. I am transcending the, lifestory, that’s familiar, but not productive or growth oriented. I choose to transcend that, lifestory, and show up in my organization as my best self, that mindset contributes to organizational, wellness.

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Rewrite your Lifestory by Going Back to Your Childhood Home

Myrna – I was listening an interview on Oprah Super Soul Conversations and the author talked about going back to your childhood home and looking through the window. What were your thoughts back then as a child when you looked through the window? Did you envy your friends because they had better clothes than you? Did you want to be white and have long straight hair? Looking through your childhood window allows you to understand your mindset and rewrite your, life story.

A lot of times you have to go back to the trauma and look at it from those eyes and maybe you will see something different. Looking back you could see something someone said to you that had traumatized you for years and now you see it was nothing.  The, story, that you been telling yourself for 30 or 40 years did not happen as you saw it.

How men can be vulnerable as Leaders

Vulnerability, for a guy is like being open to show your feelings even though you have told that real men don’t do this or that.  The things that society doesn’t let you talk about because you’ll look weak. Vulnerability, is like a beach ball in the ocean. Imagine you have a beach ball and it’s fully inflated and you’re trying to push it under water, it’s gonna to always pop back up. That’s like your trauma popping back up and you keep trying to push it back down.

That leads to self-sabotage and repeated destructive patterns.  The beach ball represents, vulnerability. If you open the tab and let some of the air out of the beach ball you will be able to keep it under water.  As a leader you have to become vulnerable to prevent self-sabotage.

Myrna – I remember Tyler Perry talking about this particular subject.  He was taught that men don’t cry and that he’s gone to funerals and people have told him don’t cry, you’re a man. But in an office nobody’s crying, what’s an example of, vulnerability, in a leader that showcases organizational, wellness?

Sam – In organizational, wellness, it is the action that you take to avoid the insecurity of fear. One of those insecurities could be something about like the President implemented a strategy that proved ineffective and someone else presented a better policy.  The President could fear loosing his job and being replaced.

 

Organizational Wellness and Your Life Story

Myrna – Tell us about your organization Five to Flow, I understand your mandate is to help foster, organizational wellness.  You identified that, health and wellness, is important to organizational success.

Sam – What we do at Five to Flow is we look at five areas of, organizational wellness:

  • On our website www.fivetoflow.com we have a, wellness, wave which is a diagnostic tool that anybody take and it will spit you back a score. There’s two versions, a short version and a long form version that any anybody in the organization can take. You get a score from one to five back on how all their employees answered questions in these five areas:
  • process,
  • people,
  • culture
  • analytics and
  • technology.

Each one of these areas has 25 questions for the long form and five questions for the short one about they’re employee or the leadership team or the CEO c-level, c-suite team about their experience of those five areas of the business.

 

Conclusion

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Finally, I want to invite you guys to join my Facebook group called life coach for daily inspiration from Coaches and thought leaders from around the world.

 

Additional Resources

Are You Trapped By Your Past?

How to Find Beauty in Your Now!

Ten Characteristics of a Great Leader

Best leaders of all time

An Entrepreneurial, leader,  is defined as the owner manager of an organization or Business Enterprise with considerable initiative and risk. The risk and high volatility of the, entrepreneurial mindset, is the life blood of the capitalist society. Because of the high risk of failure of the, Entrepreneur, (statistics says 1 in every 10 businesses will succeed) it is of paramount importance to have an effective, Leader, at the helm.

Here are ten of the most important characteristics of the Entrepreneurial Leader:

  1. Passionate - You must care about people above profits. People encompass the, entrepreneur, customers,  employees  community.
  2. Driven - An Entrepreneurial, Leader , must be self motivating and have a burning desire to succeed
  3. Humility - An entrepreneurial, leader, must be humble. "I believe the first test of a truly great man is in his humility". -John Ruskin Visionary 
  4. Vision - A leader, must have vision. Without vision his business will perish.
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"The most pathetic person is a person who has sight but no vision". -Helen Keller

Where do you see your company in 5 or 10 years? Are you able to recognize trends? Are you able to be innovative and re-inventive? If not, your company will become obsolete.

"Where there is no vision, everything will fail. Your business will fail, your marriage will fail, you will stumble in your spiritual life, your money will disappear, you will get fat and flabby and you will go no where in life!" - Peter Drucker.

The bible teaches "people without a vision, will perish". Not in the physical body but you will become spiritually dead. Vision is the blood that circulates in the, entrepreneur's, organization and keeps it alive. Pull your dreams gently out of the clouds, write them down, work with an Executive Coach to design action steps; only then it becomes a vision.

Loyalty – Loyalty to customers and employees is a must for the, leader.

"A person who deserves my loyalty receives it". - Joyce Maynard

A, leader, who has no followers is only out for a walk! 

5. Loyalty is the glue that keeps your employees and customers bound to you. Reciprocate it.

6. Charismatic - A Charismatic, leader, are essentially very skilled communicators. Entrepreneurial Leader,  should be verbally eloquent; but also able to communicate to followers on a deep, emotional level. They are able to articulate a compelling or captivating vision, and are able to arouse strong emotions in followers. Charisma is not a must have characteristic but a nice to have.

  • 7. Risk taker - Entrepreneurial leaders, are risk takers since the failure rate is high. With great risks come great rewards. Nothing ventured nothing gained. An, Entrepreneurial Leadership, must take risks to win!.

 

  • 8. Strength and Courage - Courage, confidence, self reliance, and persistence are the characters, leaders, needed to overcome obstacles and reach the goals in life that really matter to you and your company.

9. Spiritual strength - which includes mental and emotional strength are also important characteristics to add.

When you are able to surrender to God, and have confidence that you are on purpose; you tap into the organizing power of the Universe. The power that supports all living things, the power greater than yourself.

As goes the King goes, so does the Kingdom. Your business and your career rises and falls according to the strengths or weaknesses of its, Leader. You are the lid! A Spiritual Life and Executive Coach can help you push past limiting beliefs, and help you build that courage and confidence muscle.

  • 10. Maverick - Mavericks are talented and truthful to the point of bluntness. Mavericks break rules, not out of spite; but because the rules don't work. They are highly goal orientated, charismatic, and will question anything and everything! Mavericks are, Leaders, who eagerly make business decisions that fly in the face of business-as-usual. They deliberately turn traditions up-side-down or shut them out altogether, looking instead for new "disruptive" ideas and creative people, and in doing so find themselves on a joyous ride to success. Steve Jobs (Apple) and Richard Branson (Virgin) are often marked as 'mavericks'.

 

  • Passionately Serving - You have to be a servant to lead effectively.

 

“I don't know what your destiny will be, but one thing I know: the only ones among you who will be really happy are those who have sought and found how to serve.” ― Albert Schweitzer

What, communication skills, are important to Entrepreneurial Leader success

Let’s talk about, leadership, and then this broaden it to a straight talk between peers.  Talking straight is really a sign of respect to everyone in your life.  We’ve all met people who say they call it as they see it, that is actually quite selfish.  Talking straight is when you are able to base what you’re saying in fact.  When you talk straight with someone, you don’t postulate, you don’t pontificate,  you don’t technically tell the truth, but you kind of leave the wrong impression.  No you just you say straight up what is true.

As a life coach, I would use something called the, sandwich technique,  which means that you package that talk with something positive like a sandwich.

I would not advocate the, sandwich feedback method. I think it’s generally disingenuous. I think the better technique is to first declare your intent, because the moment there is suspicion about your intent, everything you do becomes tainted.  So be very clear on what your intent is. Say what is uncomfortable straight, no chaser without any bogus compliments and no hidden agenda.

Additional Resources 

Keep Your Vision in Front of You

15 Benefits of Hiring an Executive Coach

 

 

Universal Law of the Harvest: Are you Eating Your Seed?

 The, Law of the Harvest,  is one of the, Universal Laws. We are all familiar with the, universal laws, like the, Laws of Gravity. We know that if we jump off a building, we will fall to the ground. We know that if an apple rolls off a table it will fall to the ground. Only in space we see things floating around. I was watching a movie recently where someone vomited in space and the vomit well ….you get the picture. It did not fall to the ground! The, Universal Laws, of the Harvest can literally be referred to as the Power of the seed. You can’t harvest without first planting a seed.   See an excerpt below on planting and harvesting Lettuce.

Universal Laws of the Harvest is the reaping and sowing Principle

The, Universal Law, of the Harvest, can be demonstrated with planting lettuce. Lettuce can be started from seed or from plants. Some gardeners like to direct seed their lettuce; but many prefer to start transplants and then move them into the garden after they get off to a good start. Lettuce seed germinates best in moderate to cool temperatures with soil temperatures of 75 degrees being about ideal. The seeds are small and flat so some seed companies now offer palatalized seed for easier more accurate seeding and germination.

Lettuce seed won’t germinate well if buried too deep, so you must cover them with about 1/4 inch of light sand or screened compost. Press them lightly on the surface to firm soil or growing media against the seed and then mist them well to thoroughly moisten. One mistake many gardeners make when direct seeding lettuce out in the garden is to not prepare a fine textured, smooth seed bed. Scattered into chunky, crusty soil lettuce seed will seldom make a good stand.

Keep the seeds moist until they sprout and get off to a good start. If a seed dries out at any time during the germination process it will die. If you start seed outdoors it helps a lot to place a row cover fabric over the seed row, suspended to prevent the row cover from getting pressed into the soil surface with watering or rains. The row cover helps to keep the seeds from drying out quickly in the sun and drying wind. Remove the cover to water the seeds once or twice a day to keep them moist. Use a mister nozzle on the water hose to prevent blasting the seeds away. Gardeners often tend to plant more lettuce than they need.

Your harvest is a direct proportion to what you plant

Think about it. How many heads or plants of leaf lettuce do you eat a week? Plant enough to last a couple of weeks and a few extras to allow for some that won’t make it. Scatter the seeds one half to an inch apart. It is really easy to plant them too thick. Then when you try to thin the seeds it’s difficult not to do significant damage to the remaining plants. Plant Care Lettuce performs best if you keep it growing well with adequate soil moisture and moderate fertilization.

Water transplants in with a dilute solution of soluble fertilizer according to label instructions. Repeat this application twice weekly for a couple of weeks to ensure the new plants are off to a good start. A light application of dry fertilizer when the plants have been in about two weeks should take them on through their harvest time. Sprinkle one half cup of a 3-1-2 or 4-1-2 ratio fertilizer per 10 foot of planting row. Then lightly scratch it into the surface and water it in well. Lettuce is shallow rooted so avoid deep cultivation. Stay ahead of weeds so you don’t disturb the lettuce plants later when removing large competing weeds.

Light, shallow cultivation is best. You can mulch the best when plants are well on their way. This will also help prevent soil from splashing onto the leaves during rain or irrigation. Problems Lettuce used to be plagued by several diseases that could wipe out plantings. Most modern varieties have some good resistance built in, but at times during wet periods some fungal rots and mildews may show up. I suggest that should such a problem arise just pull out affected plants and keep the new plantings coming rather than resort to sprays, especially since by the time some rot shows up it is too late to do that plant much good with a spray. Lettuce is fairly cold hardy and will tolerate light frosts with little to no damage.

Young seedlings are more prone to freeze damage. Harvest Head types are best harvested after they develop a firm head. Bibb lettuce is ready to harvest when the plants have reached about their full size and the leaves are just starting to cup inward slightly as if to form a loose head. Leaf lettuce can be harvested at any time from when you are thinning young plants on. But is it best to either harvest older leaves, leaving the plants to grow for later harvests or cut entire plants out when they reach near full size for the variety. I generally make harvest decisions based on how much other lettuce is coming along for later harvest. If I have plenty on the way I’ll pull more plants when they are younger. If not then I may just harvest outer leaves to get more later on from the older plants. The, law of the harvest, is finite.  You have to plant the seed and let nature do the rest.  If you don’t plant, you cannot get a harvest.

The, Universal law of the harvest, can be applied to all areas of life.

The, Universal Law, of the harvest, most popular text reference is from the book of Galatians in the Bible which reads,

“For whatever a man sows that and that only is what he will reap.

Most people are inclined to ask the “why” question when things happen to them. In most instances the answer is found in the, law of the harvest.   You are simply reaping the harvests of what you have previously sown. Whenever you get results you do not desire, begin to interrogate what kind of seeds you have been planting. From the lettuce illustration above; if you plant lettuce seeds, you will not reap or harvest cabbage. Thus the reference that you always reap what you sow!

The reason why some probably do not have happiness is because they don’t sow happiness. When you sow strife you reap strife. This is why it is necessary to carefully analyze what seeds you plant in your relationships, be it with your friends, family, or business associates.   The quality of that relationship is solely premised on the seeds you plant with your actions and words. If you plant mistrust, you will reap mistrust. One of the best advice I have every received on seed planting in relationships was

“treat your marriage and relationships like a bank account, you have to make more deposits than withdrawals or you become overdrawn”.

Every time you give of yourself or serve another, you are planting seeds that will grow into a harvest. I believe that even if you are planting into a relationship now that does not bear fruit, you will still harvest in another relationship or in your job or in your children! So keep planting the, law of the harvest, is truth.

Another, law of the harvest, is that you will reap according to the measure that you sow. The Law states that: “He who sows sparingly and grudgingly will also reap sparingly and grudgingly and he who sows generously will also reap generously and with blessings.”

Once you have identified the kind of harvest you desire, it is important to realize that again you determine the amount of harvest you receive with the amount of seed you plant. In the illustration above the farmer planted much more seed than was necessary for the harvest because he knew that some will die, either from decease, from thinning, or from rocky soil. If the seed you are planting is for the harvest of a promotion then you have to work harder than the rest and stand out. If the seed you are planting is to harvest a spouse, then you have to plant trust, service, love, affection, stability, and much more seeds than the other suitors.

It is like the seed put in the soil – the more one sows, the greater the harvest. ~~~~Orison Swett Marden

The, Law of the Harvest, says We Reap In Proportion to What We Sow

The promise and warning of Scripture about, sowing and reaping, is that we reap what we sow. This means that life’s choices are filled with consequences both good and bad — Reaping what we sow means we reap only what has been sown, we reap in kind as we sow, we reap in a different season than we sow, we reap more than we sow, but we also reap in proportion to what we sow.

We also can reap more than we sow. No fact is more significant and sobering than this one. When we sow good, we bountifully receive from the hand of God who is debtor to no man;

The, universal law, of the  harvest states that the, harvest, is always greater than the seed planted.

If this were not the case, no farmer would ever plant a thing; if he only got back what germinated in the ground. He would be on the losing end and spend his life in utter futility.   Reaping more than we sow is fundamental to the, Universal  Laws, of the Harvest and this is not just true for the agricultural world, it is true for nearly every aspect of life: for the physical and the spiritual, for believers and unbelievers alike.   The, Universal law,  of the harvest, works in reverse as well. When we sow evil, we will generally reap more evil than we sowed as well. This is one of the most important of the, universal laws.

Application of the 7  Universal Laws

There are, 7 Universal Laws. Some people are in the habit of expecting way too much than what they give in. A salesperson who does not do the activity of calling on customers or engaging in the sales activity; but who hopes to get lucky by customers falling in his or her lap soon finds out that the, universal Law,  of the Harvest is finite.

“You can’t reap what you don’t plant”

Only miracles supersede and defy these laws. The effort you put in determines the outcome you receive. Always!

Another, law of the harvest, is that the harvest follows planting and not vice versa.

Some people are naïve to say the least. They expect to reap first then they harvest. That is absurd. The Laws of, sowing and reaping, says you first sow then you reap. How miraculous would it be that you find a field of lettuce and no one planted any seeds or seedlings? I would bet that you would not eat that lettuce because you would be suspicious of where it came from. So expecting the rewards before you do the work is ludicrous.

  • You have to plant the seed,
  • you have to water every day,
  • you have to fertilize,
  • you have to make sure the plants get sunlight,
  • you have to protect from pests;
  • only then you can taste the sweetness of the, harvest.

You must have seed for your harvest. Are you eating your seed?

Most average and poor people are guilty of this statement, “we don’t give because we don’t have.” The reality is the opposite however; you don’t have because you don’t give. The, universal law, of the, harvest, says you have to give to get. Someone told me a great analogy once at a party.

“If your hands are closed, then not only can you not give, but you also cannot receive”

So make sure your hand is open to give and to receive. Everyone has a seed which will take them to a next level of plenty (with regard to the seed sown). The problem is most people think they should have plenty in order to plant. That is why some people need thousands to start a business while some can start from just a few dollars. I read about a lady who borrowed $3000.00 from family and friends to start her own business as a pottery consultant. I don’t remember the name of her company, but she purchased pots and pans and taught people how to cook in those pots and pans.

She had just sold her Company to Warren Buffet for 900 million! God can do a lot with very little!

The last, Law of the Harvest, I will share states that,

“There is always a time interval between planting and harvesting.”

Sowing and reaping happens in different seasons

You sow in a different season from the one you reap in. Most people cannot endure the season of waiting for the, harvest, which is why they do not plant at all. They seek instant gratification so they would rather eat the seed, rather than plant it and wait for the, harvest. They do something today and expect results tomorrow. There is nothing like that! You can’t circumvent the, Law of the Harvest! You miss or eliminate a step and you get no lettuce or fruit.

If you decide that to plant and not water, your seedlings will die. If you start watering and caring for the soil and there is no seed planted you reap nice dirt! You have to plant, water, protect and wait for the harvest. You plant your seed in the spring and, harvest, in the summer or fall. Remember that for everything you need in life, there is a seed that you can plant. Everything that you have ever wanted in your life can be planted and you will begin to enjoy the benefits of the, laws of the harvest.

If you plant nothing you reap nothing.

Start planting the seeds that give you the results you require. Remember if you eat your seed, there can be no, harvest. Everyone has something they can plant!

The, law of the harvest, can be applied to your Academics, Spiritual life, Finances, Relationships, Career, Business and anywhere else you desire to see results.

Additional Resources

Caring for your Inception or Thought Seeds

https://blog.myhelps.us/how-to-care-for-your-thought-seed/

https://blog.myhelps.us/how-to-reap-where-you-plant/

Tragedy and Blessings Both Show up Suddenly

Mother wound healing

Tragedy, and, Blessings, both show up unexpectedly. We never know when it is the last time we will hug our loved ones, because tomorrow is not promised.  Your big break can happen today or your can break your leg today.

The scripture I want to reference today for my Preach the Word Worldwide Television Audience  is

Ecclesiastes 9:12 People can never predict when, hard times, might come. Like fish caught in a net or birds in a trap, people are caught by sudden, tragedy.

Listen to the full audio here:

Tragedy happen suddenly just like fish caught in a net

I want to share 2 stories with you today to illustrate this, life lesson.

Last month I took a trip back home to Toronto, Canada to see my new grandson.

My brother picked me up at the airport at 1 am. When we got to his house his wife and son were both up, so we stayed up and talked until 3 am before I went to bed. When I woke up in the morning everything had changed. Rose my brother’s wife received a call about 3.30 am that morning that her mom had a brain aneurysm. By 10.00 am that morning they knew that she was not going to recover. The blood vessel broke in her brain in a location that was inoperable. She died a few days later. That same night Rose had spoken to her mother at around 10 pm when she called and made arrangements to visit on the weekend. They ended the call with I love you. That was the last time they spoke.  Tragedy, never us a warning.

Like fish caught in a net people are caught by sudden, tragedy.

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The Polarity of the Universe

This is a Universe of polarity and the opposite of, tragedy, is, blessings. In my life fortunately I have had more, blessings, than, tragedy.

Let me share a personal story.

I live in an HOA community, Colony Trace HOA managed by Alliant Property Management Since I have 3 empty bedrooms in my home, I decided to rent one of them.

About 3 months after my tenant moved in, Alliant Property Management, sent me a notice telling me that I was in violation of the lease restriction.  No short-term rentals under 7 months are permitted in the community and asked me to provide a lease. I replied that a lease is not required for a roommate. I asked them if they were aware that I am living in my home. They responded by fining me $1000; but they did not stop there. I received an invoice along with a letter of intent to place a lien on my property from, Alliant Property Management, Attorney along with his bill for an extra $1000 in costs and charges.

Alliant Property Management is Corrupt

Alliant Property Management, has been terrorizing owners for a long time.  In 2014, I managed a property in the Promenade at the Forum in Fort Myers, Fl for an out of town owner.  Alliant Association Management, as they were called back then, before they changed their name to Alliant Property Management, took advantage of a Canadian Owner and sent fines for things like the garbage can being left outside, the garage door needed painting, the AC needed to be enclosed, pressure washing and everything they could think of.  They ignored the law requiring them to send 3 notices and allow owners a change to fix the problem before a fine is placed.

Instead they would send one registered letter to the tenant who obviously did not pick up certified mail that was not there’s.  They then placed a lien on the property and started foreclosure proceedings.  The owner paid over $15,000 in fines, legal fees to remove the foreclosure.

They then did the same thing again in 2018.  We had to sell the property at a loss in 2019 because we knew they would continue to rape us because they found a loophole in the system.  They never even sent out coupon booklets for dues.  It is like they couldn’t afford the stamp to Ontario, Canada.

 

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The Tragedy of Race discriminations By Colony Trace HOA

I became incensed. My gift is words and I pride myself in my letter writing ability. The voices in my head were constantly feeding me info on what I should say in response to this injustice. My mind could not let it go. I was going to bed at 12 midnight and waking up at 2 am with thoughts of my response to this situation. I would have to get up and write in my journal to download so I could sleep.

Now I am a, life coach and I try to live my life consciously. I know that this negative energy was not good. I know that when we feel bad, we attract, tragedy, into your experience.

So I tried to practice awareness. I prayed, I paid attention to my breathe, I paid attention to sensations in my body to bring me into awareness. Nothing worked for long.  It was like trying to push an inflated beachball under water. It would keep pushing back to the surface. This negative energy affected my work, I became bored, had no interest in my work.

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Awareness helps to let your sun and Blessings flow into your life

I kept trying to catch my thoughts; but it seemed like the more I tried the faster they came back because  whatever you resist persists.

I finally got some relief when I did a chakra meditation and cleansed the energy circulating in my 7th Chakra.  Your chakra system is your energy ports of your body.  My negative energy regarding this situation was stuck.

You must take control of your energy body and keep it positive for your, blessings to come through.  Your energy body is like a magnet and like attracts like.  So if you have negative energy, it attracts more of the same.  When you have a negative aura, you cannot be creative. It is like the clouds blocking the sun.

God can’t bless you when your negative energy is blocking out his blessings.

A few days after taking control of my mind and my energy, I went into my Gmail account, which is not my primary inbox and these words almost jumped off the page at me. PTWWNTV is looking for life coaches and radio hostsIndeed.com sent me an email. They sent it twice!

My Blessings is a New TV Talk Show on the PTWWNTV

I dropped what I was doing immediately and investigated this. I am a life coach and a radio and podcast host!  I immediately updated my resume and applied for the job.

Two days later I have a TV program on The Preach the word worldwide network. My show premiered  March 21. My show airs every Sunday at 6 pm EST and locally on Comcast Channel 16.5 Atlanta.  The preach the word worldwide network is streamed into 50 million homes and can be found online at PTWWN.com, on Apple TV and   Amazon Fire TV 

I have always dreamed of hosting my own television show. Every time I upload a YouTube video, I try to activate the Law of Attraction; but never in wildest dreams did I imagine that I would attract, blessings, to spread the word of God.

The Blessings of Hope and Encouragement

My message is to offer Hope and encouragement by the renewing of your mind. Life is going to beat you down. People are going to hate you because of the color of your skin, because of your religion or just because your spirit clashes with theirs; but if you let it consume you it will keep you in a negative spiral and block your, blessings, of what God wants to do for you.

So, remember when you feel bad, you are attracting more of the same to you.  Try meditation, prayer, take a walk in nature anything to get you back into the present moment and watch God suddenly shower you with, blessings, you don’t have room to receive!

Conclusion Troubles and Blessings

Both Tragedy, hard times, and, trouble, show up suddenly. Life the Bible teaches like fish caught in a net, tragedy, shows up suddenly.

It could be you lost your job because of the pandemic and you have no money to eat or feed your kids.

I could by sudden illness like a stroke or heart attach and you have to live the rest of your life a  vegetable

Or it could be the, tragedy,  we most fear, the loss of a loved one.

The only thing we can do is to live every day like it’s your last and tell your loved ones you love them every time you talk to them because you never know when it will be the last time, you speak to them in this life.

Blessings also show up suddenly.  A casting agent can pick you out of a crowd and turn you into a star.  You could get the promotion you never expected, You could get a, TV talk show,  like me.

For Sponsorship opportunities on the, Transform Your Mind, TV Talk Show, click the link below for our sponsorship packages.

https://myhelps.us/reach-a-worldwide-audience-as-a-preach-the-word-tv-sponsor/

 

How to Program Your Subconscious Mind for Permanent Change

The, subconscious mind, is a data-bank for everything, which is not in your, conscious mind,. It stores your beliefs, your previous experience, your memories, your skills. Everything that you have seen, done or thought is also there. It is also your guidance system. The, subconscious mind, can also be described as a tape recorder and it just plays back what it records unless you make the conscious effort at, subconscious mind reprogramming, and  erase the tape and record new messages.  That is the only way to affect permanent change, erase and re record.

Today on the, Transform your Mind, to Transform your Life Radio show and podcast, Coach Myrna Young interviews Neuro Linguistic Programming, NLP, Coach Van Henry. Van tells our audience why he became an, NLP, coach. He was on assignment as an engineer in South Africa during the Apartheid regime, when he had a conversation with a Black man who told him that he was told at a young age that he was unteachable, because he had a smaller brain than the white man.

Van of course told him that was a lie, that he himself was an educated black man with an engineering degree. He convinced this man that his brain was the same size as the White man, the Chinese man and all other races because God created us all equal! That was indeed, subconscious mind, programming.

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Sponsor The Transform Your Mind Podcast

This Black man was convinced, because he was looking at the evidence, Van Henry himself. He then changed his, subconscious mind, programming by rewriting the tape and re recording new information to believe that he could be educated and that he had as big a brain as the White man. This Black man went on to have a college degree and become a supervisor, leading a fulfilling life.

So as a Transformations Coach, I would like to do the same for you. The lie that you tell yourself can be anything. It does not have to be that you are not as smart enough, pretty enough, thin enough etc. ; you could believe that you are limited by any other belief that is holding you in bondage.

Soundcloud Transform your mind podcast
Transform your Mind Soundcloud podcast

How the, subconscious mind, works

Your, subconscious mind, is an unquestioning servant that works day and night to make your behavior fits a pattern consistent with your emotionalized thoughts, hopes, and desires. Your, subconscious mind, grows either flowers or weeds in the garden of your life, whichever you plant by the mental equivalents you create.

Your, subconscious mind, has what is called a homeostatic impulse. It keeps your body temperature at 98.6 degrees Fahrenheit, just as it keeps you breathing regularly and keeps your heart beating at a certain rate. Through your autonomic nervous system, it maintains a balance among the hundreds of chemicals in your billions of cells so that your entire physical machine functions in complete harmony most of the time.

Your, subconscious mind, also practices homeostasis in your mental realm, by keeping you thinking and acting in a manner consistent with what you have done and said in the past.

Neuro Linguistic Programming, is the art of training the, subconscious mind, to achieve a goal.

  1. The first thing you have to do to, subconscious mind reprogramming, is to Master Self. Master your self talk, master your beliefs.
  2. Then you have to write your goals down and give them form.
  3. Once you give them form, you have to tell someone who can hold you accountable.
    This does two things. Firstly, once you speak your goals into the atmosphere you activate the, Laws of Attraction, and secondly it motivates you to not look like a failure to the person holding you accountable.
  4. The forth thing is to access your values to be sure there is no conflict with your beliefs. This is where awareness comes in. You have to know who you are.

You have to know Yourself, to Grow Yourself

Transform your Mind Stitcher
Transform your Mind iTunes 

For you to grow, to get out of your comfort zone, you have to be willing to feel awkward and uncomfortable doing new things the first few times. If it’s worth doing well, it’s worth doing poorly until you get a feel for it, until you develop a new comfort zone at a new, higher level of competence.

Subconscious Mind Reprogramming

For those looking to expand their realm of comfort zones, I highly recommend considering the habits of successful people as they are the patterns commonly adopted by the minds of great leaders and thinkers. Unlocking the power of these behaviors will put you one step closer to being able to make the same things happen in your life.

Learning techniques for, subconscious mind reprogramming, will help you believe in yourself because your confidence will no longer be challenged by fear of the unknown. But more importantly, doing so will train your brain to be in line with your true desires, dreams, and life goals and a mission driven life. 

The more in tune with your, subconscious mind, you become, the closer you will be to breaking through to success. For example, you might have an idea for a book that has been on your back burner for years. With the right level of confidence, you’ll take the next step in learning how to write a book, rather than clinging to the dream, but never acting.

Listen to this YouTube video and hear directly from, NLP, coach Van Henry on How to Program your, subconscious mind, for permanent change. Once you believe, then you can achieve!.

You become a master builder, as your coach I will give you the tools to help you build.

Transform Your Mind iHeart Radio
iHeart Radio

 

If you are a coach or an author and you would like to be a guest on the “Mindset Transformation Talk Radio Show” email me at info@myhelps.us

Subscribe to get a copy of all new shows

Additional Resources

https://blog.myhelps.us/how-to-reprogram-your-unconscious-mind/

https://blog.myhelps.us/who-is-tending-your-mind-garden/

How To Pray for a Job as a Job Seeker

If you are a, job seeker, spend time with God in, prayer; you will get direction on how to get that, dream job, because with God nothing is impossible.

Listen to the Full Interview here:

 

I want to welcome you to the Transform your Mind to Transform your Life,  Radio,  Podcast and now television show page. We are now live every Sunday 6:00 pm EST on Preach the Word World Wide Television Network and 24/7 on demand.

Introduction Prayers for the Job Seeker

My guest today is Sonia H Cameron. Sonia is the author of “God Help Me Find A Job: 21 Prayers For The Job Seeker

Book: Prayers for the Job Seeker
Book: Prayers for the Job Seeker

This is such an important message for today’s climate where there are millions of people unemployed and are, job seekers. You may be praying “God to help me find a, job” and maybe not only help you find a job; but hopefully your, prayers, are also for increase. A better, job, or even a raise in pay.  Some states are considering raising the minimum wage.

I want to reference a scripture on, prayer, it is found in Psalms 141: 2

“Let my, prayer, stand before you like incense.  Let my uplifted hands be like the evening offering”.

I personally believe that the language of God is faith and, prayer.  You must have faith that anything you ask for in, prayer, that you’ve already received.

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Download on Spotify

How To Ask God to Help You Find a Job

We’re going to take a deep dive into, prayers, for the, job seeker.

Myrna – Sonia what led you to believe in, prayer?

Sonia – First of all I want to introduce myself.  I am the blogger from blessthework.com.

I was led to write the book in 2020 when I heard that there were 17 million people unemployed during the pandemic and my heart just went out to those people.

I was inspired to start pinning, prayers, and the book just flowed out of me. I got an editor and the book just came into place in about six weeks.

Christians need God’s Help to Find a Job

In 2008 I was released from my, job, and I really did not know what to do or how to proceed.

I had been a, Christian, all my life; but I never thought about, God, being present in my career.  I never mixed, God, and career together.  I was in a situation where I went on an interview and they asked me, why I left my most recent position, and I didn’t tell the truth. I was afraid to tell them I was fired so I lied and told them I was laid off.

Myrna – That’s a common fear among, job seekers, but as a, Christian, you probably felt badly because you told a lie.

Sonia – Correct. I was distraught because of this lie and I just started praying.

I said, God, you know I messed up.  I’m depending on you to help me, find a job.

I’m going to stand in my truth the next time someone asked me, why did you leave

your last job.  I’m going to tell them it just didn’t work out.

God did help me, find a job, so I started writing and blogging about it, because I felt like it would help the, jobseeker.

I post tips on acing the, job search, and other useful information on my blog for the, job seeker,

Soundcloud Transform your mind podcast
Transform your Mind Soundcloud podcast

Tips on How to Find a Job

Here are 2 tips on, how to find a job, or propel their career forward. Tip # 1 is:

  1. Rehearsing your wins because when you’re in an interview you need to brag on yourself. A lot of times when a person gets released from a, job, they feel badly about themselves and they lose confidence.  But if you take the time to write your story and what you’ve accomplished in your last, job, eg.  You were promoted, you were responsible for saving the company lots of money on an initiative etc. These wins give you confidence.
  2. Number two is to take a baby steps every day towards your goal to, find a job. My suggestion is to do one thing a day. Whether is making phone calls or sending an email or taking an assessment. Take baby steps.

Myrna – This is good. My pastor preached a sermon on creating your “book of wars” you record all your victories and all your wins. This is powerful to help you when you feel low. The book of wars is mentioned in the bible.

In an interview they’re going to ask you what are your strengths, so if you convert your wins to your strengths, it’s an excellent way to brag on yourself.

Sonia – On my website blessthework.com I have a road map and a calendar of things that you can do daily to lead you to your next, job.

Why is Prayer important for the Job Seeker

Myrna – I want to get back to, prayer.  Why do you feel that, prayer, is an important component to the, jobseeker?  You share 21 prayers in your book; but before we get into specific, prayers, why do you think that the, jobseeker, should lead with, prayer?

Sonia – A lot of times people feel like it’s impossible to get the next, job, or their, dream job; but Luke 1:37 says

“Nothing is impossible for God!”

 

So, if you spend time with, God, in, prayer, you will get direction on how to get that, dream job, and nothing will be impossible.  If you don’t spend time reading the, scriptures, you won’t have that confidence. You must spend time in, prayer.  Sit and listen to inspirational songs or gospel songs.  When you are still, you will get downloads of next steps from the Holy Spirit.

When Jesus went back to heaven, he left us a comforter and a friend, and that person is the holy spirit.  When you spend time in the presence of God, the holy spirit will minister to you and tell you what your next step should be.

Myrna – I definitely believe in that wholeheartedly.  I sit still and meditate on the word.  I meditate on the life that’s flowing through my body and try to be aware of God’s presence. I’m always listening for instructions from my spirit guide.

When you are looking for a, job, or have any other goal in life that you’re believing and, praying, for, whether you are praying for a spouse, a job, your health, you should listen for next steps from God or the Holy Spirit.

Keto Diet plan
Keto Diet plan

Prayer for the Job seeker

Heavenly father you are the most powerful God, you are my rock and my salvation.

I must be honest; fear has taken over my thoughts lately.  I know this fear is not an emotion that comes from you and I know that faith in you is the remedy for fear.

Thank you for changing the atmosphere of my life because of your power inside of me I am no longer afraid.  I will not fear famine, I will not fear criticism, I will overcome the thoughts of not being smart enough.

I am not afraid of economic reports, because you control my personal economy.  I am not scared of being in the wrong demographic. I am determined to break past my fear of failure. I am full of faith that I will get your provision for a new, job.  I know you will exceed my expectations because you keep all of your promises.

I believe the scripture that says “for I am the lord your God who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, do not fear I will help you Isaiah 41.

In the name of Jesus, I pray Amen.

Transform Your Mind iHeart Radio
iHeart Radio

 Prayer for connections for the job seeker

Heavenly father you are all knowing God. I need you to connect me with the people who will assist me with my, job search. You know me and everything about them, you know the skills I need to connect with the right people.

Thank you for making me an excellent communicator so that I can tell people how to help me.

Lord I believe I will recognize people who can solve a problem for me. I pray that as I spend more time with you, you will connect me to those who have influence and can give me favor with colleagues, human resource associates and industry leaders.

Thank you for the divine connections, that will help me reach my destiny.  I believe John 15:7

“if you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish and it will be done for you”.

In Jesus name I pray Amen

Conclusion

Myrna – Tell us a little bit more about your book “God Help Me Find A Job: 21 Prayers For The Job Seeker” and about your blog.

Sonia – My book is available on amazon. In fact, I have two books one just came out this year it’s a companion journal to the, prayer, book.  The companion journal lets you journal about your job search journey and it asks key questions.  It allows you to write your own, prayers, because everybody’s, job search, journey is unique.

In the back of the book I have a job search organizer. This, job search, organizer lets you record your search, records the employers that you have put applications in with who you talk to, what kind of salary they offer etc.

Both these books are available on amazon. I have a blog for, prayers, and a blog for advice on your career and the name of my website is blessthework.com. You can follow me on Facebook fan page @bless the work of our hands.

 

Myrna – Thank you for being my first guest on the Preach the Word Worldwide Television Network.  It was an on-time message.

Additional Resources

How to Access God Through Worship

 

5 Mindset Shifts For Couples to Have Fantastic Relationships

mindset shifts for long term relationships

If you want a fantastic, relationship, with your significant other, you need some mindset shifts, from thinking like a girlfriend to thinking like his wife.

Mindset shifts or, transformation, is necessary if your belief system is not producing the results you are expecting in life. As a Life and, Transformation, Coach, I wanted to share some, mindset, transformations about relationships that may get you better results.

5 Mindset Shifts

1. What is the right reason to enter into a long term relationship?

Most of us (including me before I was enlightened) feel that we should enter into a long term commitment because we “fell” in love.
Others may enter into a long term, relationship, like marriage because they want children; they want security or even to stem loneliness. But, according to Neale Donald Walsch from the “Conversations with God” series, we should put a little more thought into choosing a long term partner than feelings.

 

We should enter into a long term partnership for a mutually beneficial purpose.

I was watching an very old episode of Oprah a few weeks ago and she was interviewing the Smith’s. I was so impressed with Will Smith and Jada Pinketh Smith’s philosophy on marriage and family. They had a mutually beneficial purpose for their, relationship, and it continues today. They have family meetings every week to keep the purpose of the marriage and family in front of them.

Their purpose for getting together was to enhance the lives of others and they do that by always choosing work that inspires others.
And even though we have heard many rumors of the marriage failing, it is still standing because their purpose for it is greater than the two of them.

  • So when two people enter in a, long term relationship, they have the, mindset, to figure out the Why? What is the mutually beneficial purpose?
    Are they wanting to bring up children for a purpose?
    Like Will and Jada Smith
    -Are they wanting to enhance Gods kingdom?
    Like Joel and Victoria Osteen
    -Are they going to change the world through leadership?
    Like Barack and Michelle Obama?

If the purpose is strong it will be like a house built on the rocks, it will withstand the storms

Why relationships Fail

2. Mindset Shifts, Why do relationships fail?
Statistics show that, relationships, fail because of failed expectations.
Most, relationships, start out with each party having predefined expectations about what they want out of the relationship and what they want from the other person.

Contrary to popular opinion another person cannot complete you, you must complete yourself.

The bible teaches that it is not if another person will disappoint, but when. So when you enter into a, relationship, and its survival is based on what the other person does, says, etc. You will always be disappointed.

Mindset shifts,  is necessary to become the best you, to make sure you are living up to your ideal self because we can never change another person, we can only change ourselves.
For example, there is conflict over a wife’s expectation that her husband takes her out on romantic dinners once per month. She is waiting on him to make the offer and he doesn’t, instead he goes out with his friends and leaves her at home with the kids.
She has several options:
Sulking, picking a fight, going out with her girlfriends – none of which heals the relationship – or she can Give That Which She Wants.
She can take him to dinner, she can cook a romantic dinner and send the kids to the babysitter. She can respond with love.

Anything you want, you first have to give.

Mindset Shift – Take care of yourself First

3. Mindset shifts: – Become self-centered.
I know this is going to shock some, because we were all brought up to believe that being selfish and self-centered is bad; but not according to the bible! The bible teaches that we must love others as we love ourselves.

Our first relationship must be with self.

We must learn to honor and cherish self and love ourselves before we can love another.
We can never truly fall in love with another, until we have truly fallen in love with ourselves.
I know women are always sacrificing self for others, they think it makes for a good relationship; but it has the opposite effect.

They get burnt out and then resentment sets in. Then they start to resent their spouse for doing nothing. They cultivated that attitude.
The old saying that you have to train people how to treat you is truth. You start off doing all the work in the home, looking after the kids, doing all the cooking, while your spouse drinks beer and watch TV, then 5 years later when you are burnt out. You shouldn’t blame your spouse!

You should be self centered and make time in the day for your self.
Get up and go to the gym, walk, pray or meditate.
Make time in the evening to reflect, learn something, relax!
Everyone around you will benefit.

4. Mindset shifts:   – Being hurt and disappointed  

We will all have hurt and disappointments in our lives.
In fact there is an old saying that says:

You are either going through something, coming out of something or about to go through something!

It is time for us to adopt a different response to our challenges and disappointments.
As humans we react with pain and hurt to what another is being, saying or doing.
The first thing we should do is to become conscious and aware of the feelings we are having.
Don’t run from the pain, don’t mask it with drugs or alcohol. Feel it, acknowledge it.
Try to find yourself in it.
Be honest with your feelings.

It is very important to not react with vengeance or rage, and to understand your true feelings.
Once you feel it and acknowledge it, it’s power over you diminishes and you can get to the place of this of

“This too shall pass”.
After that you can then reach for your highest self and look for the lessons.

A master knows that all experiences comes to teach and is for self-growth.

5. Mindset shifts, – Forgive or look past behaviors of your spouse or significant 

As Christians we are taught to forgive, if we want to forgiveness.
To not judge before we take the plank out of our own eyes.
So it would seem that the Christian thing to do is to forgive our spouses for his/her sins.
But in the book “Conversations with God” by Neale Donald Walsh

The author teaches that you should always do what’s best for us. Remember we are self-centered.
Your girl friends are always going to encourage you to leave your husband because he is a cheater.
Walsch says that you should leave your spouse only if it is best action for you or your children.
You leave when the marriage no longer fulfills its purpose.

Let’s look at Hilary Clinton. I believe she married Bill Clinton with a purpose. He has always been a cheater but she saw his potential as a future President; So she proposed to him and chose to overlook his infidelity. She chose self!
Today her daughter is living a purpose driven life, She was First Lady of the Unites States of America and could become the first female President of the United States of America. You have never heard of her infidelity even though we have heard all about her husband’s.
We should all follow her lead and leave our cheating spouses to God, we should concern ourselves only with self. Being the best we can be and we will get our crown here on earth as well as our heavenly crown in the next life.

Myrna is the Host of the “Mindset Transformation radio show” on

https://www.wdjyfm.com/#!on-air/cee5 every Wednesday from 5:00 pm to 6:00 pm

If you would like to be a guest or become a sponsor contact her at info@myhelps.us.

Listen to past broadcasts of the “Mindset Transformations radio show” on the Myhelps Youtube Channel
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC8p2lfxF2GhOihRv8N3EZeA

Subscribe to the Transform your Mind podcast on iTunes 

Additional Resources:

https://blog.myhelps.us/surviving-r-kelly-mindset-sexual-predator/

How to Get and How to Keep a Man

How to use Intuition as Your Guide to Happiness

Nicole Leffer is a Spiritual coach and, Clairvoyant, in this episode she teaches us, how to use intuition, to make decisions and lead happier, more fulfilling, purpose driven lives.

 

Using Intuition to help others

As an, Intuitive, and, medium, Nicole is able to pick up on information and guidance about past, present and future situations, as well as relationship and situational dynamics and likely outcomes of situations. Her gifts operate primarily via, clairvoyant, (intuitive seeing), clairaudient (intuitive hearing), clairsentient (intuitive feeling), and claircognizant (intuitive knowing) impressions. She is also a, medium, and can frequently pick up on the emotions others are experiencing and she often picks up on world events before they happen.

Called to utilize her gifts to help others lead happier, more fulfilling and purpose driven lives, Nicole offers, intuitive, readings and spiritual coaching both in Atlanta and around the world.

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Transform your Mind Stitcher
Transform your Mind Stitcher

What is Intuition

So we’re going to talk today about, intuition.  How to use intuition, to transform your life.  So how do we tie in, intuitive, reading to, intuition?

When I received the information from an, intuitive reading, it’s always a guide.  What I get is more about the situation in your life.  For example, a parent is trying to decide about keeping their child in a certain school. They’re having issues with their child and they’re thinking about moving them to another school.  They’re leaning toward moving them to another school; but they’re in conflict.  I may get the information in the form of an apple, which is a reference to education, then I’ll know it’s about their child.

They’re leaning towards a change that their own, intuition, is trying to guide them toward making the change, and I will get a validation. Something like this change will be good for your child in the long run. Because of  my gift, I get clearer information downloaded to me.  The parents are tapping into their, intuition, to move their child to another school but it is corrupted with doubt.

Most of my questions are, about relationships.  Should I marry this man? Is this woman the one? But I don’t answer questions until I have a total download of my intuitive reading.  I have no idea in the beginning of the reading of what the person’s primary objective is. I ask them to accept the reading and whatever downloads to me and then after I receive, then I ask them what they want to know.

 How to use intuition, so that it works for you.

We’re all built with the capacity of, intuition. It is what makes us human.  The first step in, using your, intuition, is recognizing that we all receive our, intuition, in multiple different ways; so the first thing is identifying how you personally receive your, intuition.  If you don’t know how you receive, intuition, you can’t recognize it when you receive it.  If you are, clairvoyant, then you see the picture in your mind. It’s not like you use something outside of your body or anything like that, it’s more like you close your eyes and picture the image in your mind.  If you’re a visual learner and are very visual, there’s a really good chance that you get your, intuition, by seeing.

I think a lot more people have the gift of hearing.  When you hear, it very similar to if you’re reading a book and your mind hears your inner voice. It is not a voice outside your head or hearing voices or anything like that. It is a variation of your own voice that you get your, intuitive, hit with.

How to use intuition, I personally get my, intuition, first thing in the morning when I’m waking up.  That’s how I recognize that it is my higher self,  giving me instructions and I always act on those instructions. I also meditate every single day, that helps me stay clear.  I think if you are curious about really wanting to be in touch with your, intuition, a meditation practice is absolutely the best thing anybody can start with. It is the jumping off point.

 

You can also subscribe to your favorite podcast players to get new episodes as they are released.

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Additional Resources

What are the, Secrets to Success,? Here are my 10 Secrets

https://blog.myhelps.us/program-positive-change/

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/intuition

Dealing with Anxiety Disorder after Addiction

Addiction and recovery side effects can include, anxiety disorder, and panic attacks. In this episode Dr Tra Ahia, Psychologist offers treatment options for dealing with, anxiety disorder.

I was listening to a podcast last week and the guest was talking about her, anxiety disorder, and her story triggered a memory of a personal acquaintance who was a heroin addict and developed, anxiety disorder.

My first introduction to Anxiety Disorder

In the late 80’s I was working in sales and my boss’s daughter was an, Heroin addict. We were close enough that she would tell me what it was like being addicted to Heroin. She told me how she would cook the heroin until it became a liquid and then she would shoot it into her neck because she got a more immediate high. She showed me the holes in her neck which she covered up with scarves. Her father who was wealthy gave her a car and she sold that car for peanuts to get money to buy Heroin.

She attempted to go to rehab several times; but always walked out because she said they just left you in a room to scream in pain. She said the pain of withdrawal was unbearable. She then started a methadone treatment which is a synthetic version of Heroin.  They reduced the dose of the methadone gradually to wean your body off Heroin. But what I want to get to was her, anxiety disorder. She got such bad, panic attacks, her gut was always in knots, that she couldn’t leave the house without her safe person, her boyfriend. I don’t remember if he used drugs; but when the relationship ended she was unable to leave to leave the house for weeks, not even to buy groceries. Then she was too anxious to start dating. She stressed about some man asking “Can I touch your boobs” I don’t know what became of her; but I think of her often.

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Podbean Transform your Mind Podcast

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What happens to the brain with Anxiety Disorder

If you have an, anxiety disorder – Your brain raises ahead to predict the future. The guest on the podcast had, anxiety disorder, and she described it as “life fright” or , agoraphobia, She said to think about Stage fright. You feel nervous, you think you are going to freeze up or faint, you start to sweat, you think people are going to laugh at you etc. well people with, anxiety disorder, or, agoraphobia, feel like that all the time.

They have, agoraphobia, talking to strangers, checking out at the grocery store, at the bank, going for an interview, at a cocktail party, almost any conversation with a stranger, that’s why the guest called it “life fright.”

 

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How does Anxiety lead to Life Fright

Dr Tra  as the author of the book “Call me an Addict, war on women” How does my story regarding anxiety being called “Life Fright” relates to your experience?

I think for that young lady or whoever coined that term, for her that helped her manage her, anxiety disorder.  That term helped her understand for herself this thing that she was feeling, so for her that was a good term to use, this, Life Fright. My thoughts when I think about, life fright,  is that I’m afraid of living period.  The entire gamut of life, so for me I would not use that term as a replicator to, anxiety disorder; but I can see why she did.

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Transform your Mind Stitcher
Transform your Mind Stitcher

I understand there are 3 types of, Anxiety Disorders,

  1. Situational anxiety
  2. social anxiety and
  3. high functioning anxiety

Can you explain the difference of these forms of, anxiety,  and which is most common with substance abuse?

There are more than just three types of, anxiety disorder,  way more.  I think it’s important also for the audience to understand that when we talk about, anxiety disorder, we’re talking about an irrational fear or, agoraphobia, of something that someone is experiencing.  It’s irrational, it’s not logical that you are excessively fearful over this specific situation or you’re apprehensive about something or you have difficulty managing daily tasks.  So when we think about, agoraphobia, or,  anxiety disorder, I want them to know that it’s irrational to know your heart is racing, and you feel like you’re going to die.

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There are six main categories of, anxiety disorders,  like I said there are more than three!

  1. Phobias
  2. Panic attacks, with or without, agoraphobia, you have
  3. Generalized, anxiety disorder,
  4. Obsessive compulsive disorder or, OCD,
  5. Acute stress disorder and
  6. Post-traumatic stress disorder, or PTSD

 

The American Psychological Association lists research on how, anxiety disorder, is diagnosed.

This disorder called, anxiety disorder, the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual

It’s normal to become anxious and at one time or another. A car almost hit you, you are going for an interview, you sense danger etc. Anxiety is normal under certain conditions, what we are talking about here is the irrational fear or, agoraphobia, that is a disorder.

Something who’s unable to leave their home. This is, agoraphobia, they have a fear of leaving surroundings that they’re familiar with.

This a serious affliction.

 

There are three systems of functioning that need to change in, Anxiety Disorder

  1. Cognitive
  2. Physical and
  3. Behavioral

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How would, high-functioning anxiety, work?

An addict could develop a, panic attack, because perhaps they’re they don’t have the substance anymore, or it could be someone who gains, agoraphobia,  as a result of some interaction they’ve had with a place they frequented to attain their substance.

An addict with, high-functioning anxiety, usually is on a treatment plan in conjunction with medication to control their, anxiety disorder.

An addict could develop a, panic attack, because perhaps they’re they don’t have the substance anymore, or it could be someone who gains, agoraphobia,  as a result of some interaction they’ve had with a place they frequented to attain their substance.

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Transform your Mind Stitcher
Transform your Mind Stitcher

Anxiety disorder is a form of mental illness. Dr Tra outside of substance abuse, what are some other  contributing factors to, Anxiety Disorder?

I understand that mental illness presents itself in many forms:

  • Schizophrenia
  • Anxiety disorder
  • Anorexia
  • Depression
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My research shows that these disorders present themselves as early as 14 years old and can be treated successfully by mental health professionals if treatment is started early; but because people feel that mental illness equals crazy, they don’t talk about it or seek help.

Research show that 90% of suicides results from mental illness like, anxiety disorder, and depression. How does talk therapy from a Life Coach, social worker or Psychologist such as yourself help patients?

Talk therapy allows the client to feel listened to and understood.  It allows them to download and get advise.  It can save many from suicide.

 

How would you help someone suffering from, anxiety disorder?

Mental illness is something that keeps a lot of people up at night but nobody wants to talk about during the day

It is the visitor who enters without knocking

1 in 20 become disabled by mental illness i.e. Can’t function in society

So let’s start talking.

ANXIETY, has become the defining mental health issue of our decade — women are affected at twice the rate of men, and now children and young adults are also more stressed and anxious than ever before. Join us to learn nutritional and gut solutions for your anxiety!

 

Additional Resources

Drug and Alcohol Treatment for Women with Trauma

https://blog.myhelps.us/understanding-and-managing-compulsive-behaviors/

https://blog.myhelps.us/call-me-an-addict-child-abuse-statistics-p3/

https://adaa.org/understanding-anxiety/suicide

https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/kc/suicidal-thoughts-ideation-193026

5 Keys to Successful Self Leadership

Success in life depends on your ability for, self leadership. You may say I am not a, leader, I am not a manager or a CEO true; but, self leadership, is more important than how many people you lead in your home or place of work.

Self leadership, is the answer to how do we develop ourselves to survive and thrive in a Volatile, Uncertain, Complex, and Ambiguous world.

Self leadership,  is the Critical Success Factor for individual and organizational success.

Here are 5 Essential Disciplines for Self Leadership 

Discipline #1 Accountability
You must learn to take full responsibility for everything on your watch. This means that the fish stinks from the head down! A great way to do this is with, self leadership, because those who follow you are watching your, leadership.

Discipline # 2 Focus
As a, Leader, you will wear many hats. Success comes from knowing where to focus your attention. Everything is important.
Acquiring the skill of discrimination allows the, leader, to discern what is most important and least important.

Discipline # 3 Organizational self leadership 

Organizational, self leadership,  is the skill through which chaos is turned into order.

Discipline # 4 Innovation
As a, leader, you will begin to consciously focus your attention and discriminate where the maximum leverage is.
You will recognize the need for continual improvement and for innovation in your processes.

Discipline # 5 Communication Skills 

Communication skills, are evident in how well you communicate your passion, vision, and mission to your employees, customers and self.

Here are 3 types of Communication Skills

The three primary means of communication are verbal, nonverbal, and visual.
  • Verbal Communication. Verbal communication depends on words to deliver meaning.
  • Nonverbal Communication. Nonverbal communication occurs when meaning or messages are sent or received without the use of words like body language.
  • Visual Communication.
Daphne Lynn Valcin is a business coach and speaker.

Daphne’s talks to us about the keys to a successful mission driven life or business.
Since 90% of startup businesses fail, Daphne believes that the quality of life and business, leadership, is at the root of success or failure.
She believes that, leadership, is about using the most effective strategies to conquer obstacles while taking consistent steps to move forward when tackling your vision, whether that vision is within the workplace, as a leader of a business or, self leadership.

Show notes:
. Daphne explains what is true, self leadership.
. What sets successful startup businesses apart from those that fail.
. How a business coach helps clients.
. What does a thriving business look like.
. What are some of the biggest mistakes companies do with their sales and marketing efforts.
. What are some of the characteristics of successful leaders.

Here are 11 strategies for effective, self leadership,  from Young Entrepreneur Council:

Leadership advice from Dale Carnegie

When managing my team, I use a tactic from Dale Carnegie: Think in terms of the other person’s wants. The goal is to align a team member’s natural talents and preferences with the company’s goals. What do they want? What motivates them? What do they like to do? Then manage them to reinforce what they want and how they can achieve those things through their work.

Additional Resources

How to Set up Your Business Structure as an Entrepreneur