Category Archives: setting goals

Unleashing the Wow Woman Within: A Journey of Body Building

The transformative journey from living an ordinary life to one that makes people turn heads in awe — becoming a, wow woman — is an inner trek that involves self-reflection, self-love, and a breadth of personal development. Based on insights shared by Katia Stern, a life coach, author, and self-proclaimed, wow woman, this process isn't just about external perceptions; it's a profound internal evolution that shapes how a woman sees herself and, subsequently, how the world sees her.

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Key Takeaways Becoming a Wow Woman

  • Embracing Personal Audacity: Commit to pursuing your desires and stepping outside conventional boxes after the age of 40 — it's never too late to transform and inspire.

  • Self-Love as the Foundation: Prioritize self-love and acceptance, understanding these are prerequisites for a significant transformation.

  • Navigating Femininity and Masculinity: Learn how to balance masculine and feminine energies, especially in relationships, to maintain healthy dynamics and personal satisfaction.

From Now to “Wow”: Decoding the Transformational Process

The conversion from an everyday woman to one that captures attention and admiration often involves charting a path that catapults personal development to the forefront. Katia's body transformation journey was a pivotal starting point where she embraced an inspiring vision — competing in fitness bikini body building competitions.   This goal was neither born from dissatisfaction nor merely the desire to look better; it came from an acknowledgment of personal potential and the pursuit of a compelling vision.

This goal-setting, or rather, desire-setting, is a testament to the power of aspiring for meaningful and far-reaching objectives. As Katia asserted, “It's not a nice thing. And I was doing that outside part. I was doing pretty well, but that didn't bring me that satisfaction that I was searching for.”

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The Role of Self-Love in Personal Transformation

The cornerstone of becoming a, wow woman, as illustrated by Katia, lies in cultivating profound self-love. This isn't merely about pampering oneself with external luxuries — although these can be expressions of self-love — but about the transformative acceptance of one's starting point, forgiving oneself, and undertaking actions that align with self-care and respect. Katia Stern conveyed the nuance of self-love, emphasizing, “Self-love is how you would want your partner, your lover, would want to treat yourself.”

The Consequences of Repressed Femininity

A recurring theme in Katia's discourse was the nuanced struggle women often face with suppressed sensuality and femininity due to societal norms and professional obligations. She shared insights on how these societal pressures compel women to adopt a more, masculine energy, mainly when ascending professional ladders and fulfilling multiple life roles. The challenge, therefore, lies in re-embracing one's femininity, especially in romantic relationships where the interplay of masculine and, feminine energies, is crucial. Katia advised, “Use that, feminine energy, to establish trust in the universe and learn to surrender, to create a space for a masculine man to step in and balance the dynamic.”

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Becoming a Wow Woman: Finding your Unique quality

A, wow woman, essence is deeply etched in her ambition to fuel dreams and desires that align with her true self — not dictated by external expectations or comparisons. It's an invitation to live boldly and authentically. Katia sternly rejects generic standards of success and ‘wowness', advocating instead for a personalized approach, “my wow is not your wow.”

Transform Your Mind iHeart Radio
iHeart Radio

Reframing Goals as Desires: The Power of Language

Language plays a fundamental role in shaping our mindset towards achieving our ambitions. Katia’s recommendation to replace the word “goal” — which carries a certain masculine weight — with “desire” is a strategic reframe that can energize and feminize the pursuit of our aims. This shift in vocabulary can have a profound effect on our mental approach, influencing our perseverance and excitement towards achieving these desires.

Listen Notes Transform Your Mind
Listen Notes Transform Your Mind

Synthesizing Transformation to Wow Woman

Katia Stern’s narrative shows us that the wow is not just a badge of external marvel; it’s an inside out revolution of self-perception, confidence, and the art of balancing our power. By cultivating self-love that manifests as a disciplined commitment to our desires, embracing our inherent femininity, and trusting in the power of personal evolution without the bounds of age, every woman has the capacity to evoke her own brand of wow. Through this, she becomes an inspiration not just for herself, but to others who are privileged to witness her transformation.

Through personal audacity, self-love as the foundation, and navigating femininity and masculinity, Katia Stern implores women worldwide to embark on their own journeys of remarkable transformation. It's a clarion call to stop waiting on the sidelines, embrace the complex tapestry of emotions and experiences, and step into the spotlight of your own life's stage where wow is not just an exclamation, but your state of being.

Additional Learning
women body building
women body building

https://www.bodybuilding.com/content/the-female-training-bible-everything-you-need-to-get-the-sexy-body-you-desire.html

 

Boost Your Self-Esteem with These 8 Self-Care Tips

Self-esteem is a fundamental aspect of our well-being. It shapes our perception of ourselves and influences how we navigate through life. When our self-esteem is healthy, we feel positive about ourselves and are better equipped to handle life's challenges. However, low self-esteem, can have a detrimental impact on our mental and emotional state, making it difficult to face adversity. In this article, we will explore eight, self-care tips, that can help, improve self-esteem, and enhance our sense of self-worth.

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Understanding Self-Esteem

Self-esteem is the opinion we hold about ourselves. It is the lens through which we view ourselves and our lives. When we have, low self-esteem,  we tend to have a negative and critical perspective, making it harder to tackle life's ups and downs. The causes of, low self-esteem, can be rooted in childhood experiences, societal expectations, stress, difficult life events, and personal tendencies towards negative thinking or setting unrealistic standards.

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1. Practice Self-Compassion and Positive Self-Talk

“Self-compassion is the foundation of self-esteem. Treat yourself with the same kindness and understanding that you would offer a friend.”

Self-compassion is a crucial aspect of, building healthy self-esteem. It involves treating ourselves with kindness and understanding, especially during times of mistakes or setbacks. Instead of being overly critical, we should practice, self-forgiveness, and offer ourselves the same support we would give to a friend. By adopting, positive self-talk, and reframing negative thoughts, we can cultivate a more compassionate and nurturing relationship with ourselves.

2. Set Realistic Goals

“Setting achievable goals, can boost your self-worth by giving you a sense of accomplishment.”

Setting realistic goals, is essential for, building self-worth. When we set achievable goals, we create opportunities for success and a sense of accomplishment. Starting with small, manageable goals and gradually working our way up allows us to celebrate our achievements, no matter how minor they may seem. On the other hand, setting unrealistic goals, can lead to feelings of failure and further, lower our self esteem.

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3. Become Aware of Your Sponsoring Thoughts

“Pay attention to these self-destructive thoughts because they are creating your reality. Replace self-criticism with, positive affirmations, or scriptures.”

Our thoughts have a significant impact on our self-esteem. Sponsoring thoughts, such as “I am not good enough” or “He won't like me because I am too fat,” can shape our reality and perpetuate negative self-perception. It is crucial to become aware of these thoughts and challenge them. By replacing self-criticism with, positive affirmations, or scriptures, we can reframe our mindset and cultivate a more positive and self-affirming outlook.

4. Engage in Self-Care Activities

“Taking care of your physical and mental well-being is vital for self-esteem. Engage in activities that make you feel good, whether it's exercising, meditating, reading, or practicing a hobby.”

Self-care is an essential component of, improving self-esteem. Engaging in activities that promote physical and mental well-being can have a profound impact on our self-perception. Whether it's exercising, meditating, reading, or pursuing a hobby, these activities nourish our body and soul, fostering a sense of self-worth and fulfillment.

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5. Surround Yourself with Supportive People

“Positive relationships can significantly impact your self-esteem. Surround yourself with people who uplift and support you. Distance yourself from those who bring negativity into your life.”

The people we surround ourselves with can greatly influence our self-esteem. Positive relationships provide a supportive environment where we feel valued and uplifted. It is important to surround ourselves with individuals who believe in us and encourage our growth. Conversely, distancing ourselves from those who bring negativity into our lives can protect our self-esteem and create space for positive influences.

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6. Learn from Mistakes

“Mistakes are an inevitable part of life. Instead of dwelling on them, view them as opportunities for growth. Embrace your mistakes as valuable lessons that can help you improve.” –

Mistakes are not a reflection of our worth but rather opportunities for growth. Instead of dwelling on our failures, we should embrace them as valuable lessons that contribute to our personal development. By reframing our perspective and focusing on the lessons learned, we can cultivate a growth mindset and boost our self-esteem.

Transform your Mind Podbean
Transform your Mind Podbean

7. Practice Gratitude

“Focusing on the positive aspects of your life can help, improve your self-esteem. Keep a gratitude journal and regularly write down things you're thankful for. This can shift your perspective and boost your self-worth.”

Practicing gratitude is a powerful tool for, improving self-esteem. By focusing on the positive aspects of our lives and regularly expressing gratitude, we shift our perspective towards a more optimistic outlook. Keeping a, gratitude journal, and writing down things we are thankful for can reinforce positive thinking patterns and enhance our sense of self-worth.

Transform Your Mind iHeart Radio
iHeart Radio

8. Seek Professional Help

“If low self-esteem is affecting your daily life significantly, don't hesitate to seek professional support. Therapists, counselors, and even coaches can provide guidance and strategies to help you improve your self-esteem.”

Sometimes, low self-esteem, can significantly impact our daily lives, making it necessary to seek professional help. Therapists, counselors, and coaches are trained to provide guidance and strategies tailored to our specific needs. Seeking professional support can be instrumental in overcoming deep-rooted self-esteem issues and embarking on a journey of self-improvement.

Conclusion and Future Outlook

Building and maintaining healthy self-esteem is an ongoing journey that requires self-care and self-compassion. By practicing self-compassion, setting realistic goals, challenging negative thoughts, engaging in self-care activities, surrounding ourselves with supportive people, learning from mistakes, practicing gratitude, and seeking professional help when needed, we can enhance our self-esteem and live a more fulfilling life.

The implications of improving self-esteem are far-reaching. It can positively impact our mental and emotional well-being, relationships, and overall quality of life. By prioritizing self-care and implementing these self-esteem-boosting strategies, we empower ourselves to navigate life's challenges with confidence and resilience.

As we continue on our journey of self-improvement, it is important to remember that building healthy self-esteem takes time. Patience and self-compassion are key as we navigate the ups and downs of this process. By embracing these self-care tips and committing to our personal growth, we can cultivate a strong sense of self-worth and embark on a future filled with self-confidence and fulfillment.

Additional Resources

https://blog.myhelps.us/self-confidence-courage-to-be-you/

The Stone the Builder Rejected, Now Cornerstone

The stone the builder rejected now cornerstone. This metaphor mirrors the human experience. Throughout history, visionaries, innovators, and creators have often encountered resistance when introducing novel ideas, unorthodox methods, or unconventional paths.
Jesus told the disciples a story of a man planting a vineyard, building a wall around it with a lookout tower and then leased it to tenants. During harvest he sent one of his servants to collect his share of thd crop but they beat him and send him back empty handed. He kept sending more servants and they beat them up too. He decided to send his only son and they beat him and killed him as well. Then Jesus said “the stone that the builders rejected has now become the cornerstone.
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Rejected children beome the cornerstone

I grew up hearing my grandmother quote this scripture and I seen it play out in families. Parents favoring one child and rejecting another and that child they rejected became the cornerstone who looked after them when they get sick or old and feeble but today I want to focus on this scripture as a, personal development tool.
This simple yet powerful saying is a reminder that what may be initially overlooked or dismissed can later prove to be essential, transformative, and foundational.
This metaphor mirrors the human experience. Throughout history, visionaries, innovators, and creators are often rejected when introducing novel ideas, unorthodox methods, or unconventional paths, then these rejected ideas become the main cornerstone.

Some rejected stones who later became the cornerstone

Consider the pioneering minds who introduced revolutionary technologies, art forms, or philosophies. Many faced skepticism and dismissal, only to have their, rejected “stones,” later become the bedrock of progress. From the Wright brothers‘ ridiculed dream of flight to the skepticism surrounding the early internet, countless examples remind us that the seeds of innovation can initially be met with doubt.
In personal journeys, too, the metaphor holds weight. People who defy societal norms or follow their passions in defiance of conventional wisdom often face rejection or misunderstanding. Yet, history has shown that those who stay true to their convictions, despite the initial rejection they encounter, can eventually shape new paradigms and redefine success.

Overlooked stones into cornerstones

The phrase's universality extends to relationships and personal growth. People who have felt rejected or marginalized can harness the, power of resilience, transforming their perceived weaknesses into sources of strength. Through determination and self-belief, individuals can evolve from, overlooked “stones” into cornerstones, of their own narratives, becoming inspirations to others who walk a similar path.
As we navigate a world of rapid change and evolving norms, the wisdom behind, “The stone the builder rejected, now become the cornerstone,” remains as relevant as ever. It encourages us to embrace the unconventional, to view rejection as an opportunity for growth, and to recognize that what society may initially dismiss can ultimately redefine and reshape the very foundation of our lives.

Conclusion

In essence, the Stone the Builder Rejected, Now the Cornerstone,  challenges us to value the overlooked, honor the unconventional, and find strength in our resilience. Just as the cornerstone provides stability and support, so too can our, rejected stones, lead us toward the solid ground on which we build our futures.
Additional resources 

Beyond Love: When Love Alone Isn’t Enough

Love is a powerful and beautiful emotion that has the ability to uplift, inspire, and bring immense joy to our lives. But what happens, when love alone isn't enough? Love forms the foundation of many relationships, providing strong bonds between partners, family members, and friends.

However, there are instances, when love alone isn't enough. In this video, coach Myrna looks at the, Bible story of Hanna, and why the love of her husband was not enough. Coach Myrna, shares 5 realities of, when love isn't enough, and how we can build resilience and understanding to overcome obstacles on the path to fulfilment.

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When love alone isn't enough

Have you ever loved someone, but could not live with them so you broke up with them instead? That is an example of, when love alone isn't enough.

Today I want to look at the bible story of Hanna and why the love of her husband was not enough.

Let’s look at 1st Samuel 1:8

Then said Elkanah her husband to her, Hannah, why weepest thou? and why eatest thou not? and why is thy heart grieved? am not I better to thee than ten sons?

Hanna had all the love a woman could want from a man, but she was not happy because she could not have children. Her husband’s love was not enough to fill the hole in her heart.

For Hanna having a husband wasn’t enough, having a man who loved her, wasn’t enough.

Love can be a wonderful and important aspect of our lives, but it is not the sole determinant of our happiness. Happiness is a complex and multifaceted emotion that can be influenced by various factors. While love can contribute significantly to our well-being, there are other aspects to consider.

Transform Your Mind Podcast Pandora
Transform Your Mind Podcast Pandora

Here are 5 reasons when love isn't enough

  1. Self-fulfillment: True happiness often involves a sense of purpose and personal fulfillment. Pursuing your passions, setting and achieving goals, and engaging in activities that bring you joy and a sense of accomplishment can contribute to overall happiness. For Hanna and most women this includes being a mother.
  2. Emotional well-being: Happiness goes beyond love and encompasses emotional well-being. It's important to develop coping skills, self-care practices, and maintain healthy relationships beyond romantic love, such as with family and friends, to cultivate happiness.
  3. Personal growth: Continuous personal growth and self-improvement can lead to a sense of fulfillment and happiness. This can include learning new skills, expanding your knowledge, and challenging yourself to become the best version of yourself. You can have all the love in the world but if you are not growing, you will feel unfulfilled.
  4. Physical and mental health: Taking care of your physical and mental health is essential for overall happiness. Engaging in regular exercise, practicing self-care, managing stress, and seeking support when needed are all crucial aspects of well-being.
  5. Meaningful connections: While romantic love is significant, nurturing relationships with friends, family, and a supportive community can provide a sense of belonging and happiness. Building and maintaining meaningful connections with others can be a source of joy and support.
Deezer Transform Your Mind Podcast
Deezer Transform Your Mind Podcast

Motherhood a path to self fulfillment

I Just finished reading Paris Hilton memoir.  In her book Paris shares her infertility journey. Like Hanna love was not enough, being a Hilton and an heiress was not enough, having a brand was not enough, like Hanna she wanted a child.

Remember that happiness is subjective, and what brings happiness to one person, may differ from another. Sometimes love of your family or spouse is enough, but most of the times you must love yourself first. It's important to explore and cultivate various areas of your life beyond love to find fulfillment and happiness. Seeking a balance between different aspects of life, investing in personal growth, and fostering relationships can contribute to a more fulfilling and joyful existence.

Being in love or receiving love is not enough for self-actualization which include realizing your dreams, being true to yourself, and achieving inner peace.

Thanks for tuning into this week’s episode of 5 min Fridays with coach Myrna

Additional Resources

Becoming Flawesome: The Journey to Self-Acceptance

 

Life-Changing Advice from a Navy Seal: Uncover His Secret to Beating Life’s Ambush!

Jason Redman, retired Navy SEAL shares life changing advice to beating life's ambush.  Jason was ambushed in battle and shot 8 times including on round to the face. Jason believes he survived this ambush by tapping into his, overcome mindset. In this episode Jason teaches the difference between:

  • a micro life ambush
  • a mini life ambush
  • a major life ambush
  • How to spot the warning signs of a life ambush
  • How to move forward after a major life ambush
  • What is situational awareness
  • How to become your own point man

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Bio

Retired Navy SEAL Lieutenant Jason Redman electrifies audiences around the world with his high-energy presentations on leadership, failure, redemption, catastrophic injury, and his breathtaking journey to “overcome all” in the aftermath of wartime enemy ambush and in the face of what he calls life ambushes during the years that followed.

During his 21-year Navy career, Jason spent 11 years as an enlisted SEAL and 10 years as a SEAL officer leading teams in combat operations in Iraq and Afghanistan. Today he puts his vast experience and expertise to work as a speaker, coach, author, and trainer, helping individuals, teams and organizations of all types and sizes to define and implement lasting change, even in the wake or face of failure, crisis and adversity.

He’s lived through it all at the highest level in his Navy SEAL career: From failures as a young leader that resulted in him almost being kicked out of the SEAL teams, to redemption and leading teams in intense combat operations in Iraq, to being shot eight times, including a round to the face, and nearly dying during an enemy ambush, Jason has lived the OVERCOME Mindset he now teaches others. He has done an incredible job of taking these lessons learned and making them relatable to teams, businesses, and organizations around the world.

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Walking into an ambush on the battle field

Myrna: Can you share your story of walking into an ambush as a Navy Seal and the, overcome mindset, you had to survive being shot several times.

Jason: I'm super blessed individual. I just could not survive that ambush that night without some kind of a miracle. We'll talk about the, overcome mindset, and how that translates to other aspects of life later in the interview. It was an intense night, it was a night at the very end of our deployment as, Navy SEALs. One of our jobs is something we call direct action. We go after the mid-level and high level leaders across the battlefield.

That was one of our jobs, when I was in Iraq and we were tracking both outside in and through leadership across with my troops were focused on the weapon western province of Iraq. So, a lot of people are familiar with Iraq, a very dangerous place. We were actually based out of Volusia and tracking leaders.  On September 13, 2007, we went after the number one leader for the outside organization in the Anbar Province, the western province of Iraq. A pretty dangerous guy.

We've been tracking all deployment.  He had been responsible for and ran multiple sniper cells, IV shells, attack cells. He had shot down a Marine Corps helicopter in the fall of 2006. Killing the whole crew on board and they lost five individual and run out of the building across the street.

So, on this night we got orders that he was at this place. We got there and even though there was no one there we noticed some suspicious activity in the building a few yards away. My team leader said hey, I want you to take your team, you know, walk these individuals down let's find out who they are in question. And make a long story short, our enemy leader had been in the first house that we were in right now.

He had moved to the house that was about 150 yards away that we were now moving on and his security detail and shut off a very, very well staged enemy ambush we estimate about 15 shooters with two large machine guns and my team and I walked right into this ambush.

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Organifi Harmony

My overcome mindset helped me survive

My medic, a fellow Navy seal, took a round of bullets right below the knee which almost took his leg off. One of our other guys ran forward to grab him and tried to move him back behind us. There was kind of a bar, there was one tree and a large like John Deere tractor tire and they pull and drag our medic and himself back.

He himself was shot three times while doing this. I was out front and I was trying to shoot and lay down fire. It was at this point I had both machine guns turned on me and I was hit eight times between my body armor and my body I took two rounds in the left elbow which in the moment I thought it shot my arm off.

I took rounds off my weapon and my right-side plates. I turned around to see what was happening with my team and that's when I caught around in the face. That hit me right in front of the ear. Travel through my face took off my nose, blew out my right cheekbones, vaporized my oval floor, broke all the bones in my face and knocked me out. I was pinned down in front of my guys. They continue to fight the enemy. There's this very intense gunfight occurring with me pinned down on the ground and had literally bullets traveling around me.

I came to probably we don't know the timeline. We know the entire gunfight lasted about 40 minutes. So, when I woke up after about 10 mins, I realized that was in a really bad situation. I called out to my team leader and he realized Holy smokes, you know, Red still alive, and they started to extract me. I owe my life to my teammates. I owe my life to an Air Force aircraft called an AC 130 gunship that brought in the closest fire mission.  Meaning they brought rounds in from the aircraft to the ground at military speeds. My team leader did an amazing job coordinating this in between fire and ran forward and got me and hold me back to where they were about a tourniquet on my mangled arms really saved my life.

But the whole time this was happening. There were several things and we'll come full circle now to a little bit of the, overcome mindset. I knew I had lost a lot of blood. I'd lost a lot of blood between my arm and my face and my injuries. And we go through a lot of, trauma medicine, and special operations training. We're probably trained up to the level of a patient, emergency medical technician that would ride around an ambulance. I knew all the signs. I knew that I was going to what we call, hypovolemic shock, from blood loss. I was struggling to breathe.

Podmust Transform Your Mind podcast
Podmust Transform Your Mind podcast

In our last moments we think only of our loved ones

And in final moments, I was still pinned down and I started to think that I may die here, I was dying. I was I was literally bleeding out and dying. And there were several things that went through my mind when I was lying there dying but not once did I think about stuff. You know in this life we're all focused on stuff and trust me I like stuff. You know, I love my house. I love you know some of the nice things we have. But I also recognize every day that all that stuff can be gone in an instant. The people you love are all you're going to care about in the final moments in your life, because that's all I thought about.

I thought about my wife and kids and how I would do anything to have another moment just to say I love you. And it was at that point that I also I called out to God. I really need help. I need strength. And that enabled me to have some strength which I can't explain. But I will tell you this, this thought popped into my head in that moment and the thought was this. Stay awake to stay alive.

And if you've ever been severely injured, or something bad has happened you reach a point where physiologically your body wants to shut down and you will become extremely fatigued. And that's what happened. I wanted to go to sleep. I wanted to just let go and go to sleep, but I know I had to stay awake to stay alive and I knew that if I made it to the military hospital, I would live.

The military emergency room. I knew the statistics, from operating overseas that if our if we got our soldiers or wounded warriors to the hospital and they still had a pulse, they had a 90% chance of making it home alive. So that was my focus. You know, stay awake, stay alive, stay awake, stay alive and this stuff there's so many nuances and stories but the bottom line is that's exactly what happened. My teammates managed to get me on the medivac helicopter metabolic and I survived.  My team leader helped me off and I walked 75 yards and got on the helicopter under my own power.

That is the, overcome mindset, and it is this mindset that says I'm not going to give in, I'm going to push until I succeed. I survived this vicious enemy ambush, but everybody gets ambushed in the life. It may not be the bullets and bombs in battle, but it is the bullets and bombs of life. And when you're on the X and the X is what we talked about, point of attack, point in crisis, the point of the incident. We all feel as overwhelmed as if you are on a battle field with bullets flying all around you. You think you're going to die because your marriage ended or your child died. And it is in those moments where we have the ability to drive forward and push ourselves a little further and get off that X, point of attack.

Transform Your Mind Amazon
Transform Your Mind Amazon

Major life Ambushes

Myrna: Wow, what a story. I had to fight back tears when you talked about lying on the ground thinking you were dying and wanting one more moment with your wife and kids. Thank you for your service to the United States of America, Jason. I heard you talk about, life ambushes, and the fact that we all have about 5 and I immediately started counting mine!  So, I want to talk about why you think first of all that we get five ambushes in life.

Jason: So the five ambushes came about from interviewing people and just kind of an informal poll.  In order to understand what is a, life ambush, we have to break them down.

There are 3 types of, life ambushes.

There are,

  • micro ambushes,
  • mini ambushes,
  • major life ambushes.

I talked about the average of five those are the, major life ambushes, and the majors are devastated. They will forever leave scars forever.  I'll come back and we'll come back full circle for the, major life ambushes.

The interesting thing, about the X, the point of attack, the point of an incident, the point of the crisis, it's the point of any adversity, everybody in life, finds himself on the X at some point in life. Everyone walks on this X at some point. In battle, we were taught you have to get off the X, point of attack  as quickly as possible because the longer you sit on the X, the harder it is to move forward.

And this is true in any aspect of your life.  If it's a, mental ambush, and you're stuck on the action in your mind, and we all get stuck there and these are these, micro ambushes, they come every day. It's that little voice in your head that says you're not good enough. You're not strong enough. You're the wrong race, creed, color, gender, demographic, etc.

So those are my core ambushes and they come all the time. The formula is the same for all of these, you have to get off the X as quickly as possible. So, my motto I overcome and drive forward and get off that X.

The second level of Ambush is what I call a, mini ambush. And these are I find this fascinating because I meet people all the time who will they'll use the phrase, oh, I had a bad day. And I'm fascinated with this because I'll always say what's the tell me about your bad day and 90% of the time when people use it. They did not really have a bad day. So, I've tried to erase this phrase from my vocabulary. I actually have an entire line of clothing called “No Bad days”

Myrna: What are the, major life ambushes?

Transform Your Mind Podcast Player FM
Transform Your Mind Podcast Player FM

What are major life ambushes

Jason: Sometimes many ambushes, we did it for ourselves. And now we have to navigate through the journey of figuring out how to drive forward.

  • It could be life threatening ailments or injury to you or someone you loved.
  • Sexual trauma to you or someone you love.
  • Maybe the loss of a loved one including the highest one, the loss of a child.

Most people we polled have about five of these, major life ambushes, in their lifetime. I've seen people with more. I know people that have had 10. I myself, I'm getting ready to turn 48, I've had four, major life ambushes. I'd love to get through life with no more.

Myrna: When I heard you speaking, I started counting my, major life ambushes.

Jason: But the here is the fact, the, major life ambushes, are devastating. And I tell people they will they will be permanent scars. They will leave permanent physical, mental, or emotional or the financial scars. And when we look back on those, major life ambushes, they will always hurt. The, minor life ambushes, and the, micro life ambushes, they're in your head, they are schedule disruptions, a couple years later, you'll barely remember them.

But here's the amazing thing about, major life ambushes. I talked about this in the TED Talk.  The, major life ambushes, frequently are the end of something that occurred in your life. It may be the end of a relationship, it may be the end of the job, or maybe the end of your health, your innocence.  Whatever it is, oftentimes what the amazing thing is and once you develop the, overcome mindset, you’re going to figure out how to drive forward and when we figured out how to drive forward no matter how painful it is, the ones that I've been through, so often it becomes a new beginning.

Google Podcast Transform Your Mind
Google Podcast Transform Your Mind

Every major life ambush builds an overcome mindset

And when you get to the other side of that journey when you climb through the pain and the misery and storms and the darkness, I can tell you probably 95% of the people, get to the other side saying you know it really was hard. I do not ever want to go to the gym, but it's one of the best things that ever happened to me because I grew and got better and, major life ambushes, build us up. Every, major life ambush, no matter how painful they are, they help build an, overcome mindset. You cannot just flip a switch and suddenly have an, overcome mindset.

So when these bad things happen. I don't want to tell you to celebrate that they happen. I know that that's probably a stretch, but instead just lean into it and say okay, I know I have to get to the other side. I have to overcome. I have to get off the edge. Somewhere out there, the sun still shines and I will find that sunlight once again and when I do it's going to be a new path.

I try to explain to people with, major life ambushes, a lot of times people waste a lot of time focused on I want back what I lost. I want to repair this relationship. I want my job back; I want my business back. I lost all this money and I want it back. I want the lifestyle I had before I was severely injured like me, I want my health back. And the reality is it’s gone and never coming back. We have to focus on is how do I get to my new 100% I may not be able to fix what's broken, I embrace the open door. But you know, so many people are focused on the past. We have to focus on the future now. And how do we shape our future? And when we do that, that becomes our new path that becomes our new 100%.

Transform your Mind Spotify Podcast
Download on Spotify

Major life ambushes always leaves clues

Myrna: that is that is so true. We are always focused on the closed door and not the open door in front of us. So, you said that, major life ambushes, leave clues.  I can understand that a divorce leaves clues. You mentioned that when you walked in to the ambush on the battlefield, you noticed certain signs but you ignored them.  So how does that missing the clues in an ambush in the battlefield and missing the clues of a, major life ambush, in real life? Give us the correlation.

Jason: I have an online course that I teach called The Point Man For Life course. And point men are navigators and leaders in the military. They're very talented individuals, they get us where we need to go. You have to be, the point man, and it's for your own life. You have to be the one that sets your course that understands where you're going.  So, these indicators are the things that many of us through normal human activity. Either choose to ignore, or, procrastinate, we do all kinds of things. I mean, I break these things down.

You know, sometimes it's a blatant sign and I use a stop sign in my course. Like we just ignore it no different than somebody who is not paying attention. And they drive through an intersection and miss that stop sign. And they get hit by a car. Well, you know, afterwards, they're like, yeah, you missed this stop sign. That's, that's a really bleak one. But it happens all the time. It happens in businesses, it happens in relationships. If your spouse is constantly saying, hey, we've lost our intimacy or we're not talking as much anymore if we continue to ignore or just flat out, not pay attention to that, you are going to end up divorced. And then you say, I did not see it coming.

Myrna: Yeah, that's one of the ones I figured out because there's signs that the relationship is ending.

Signs of an ambush

Jason: Sometimes they're more subtle. Sometimes they can be helped. I know a lot of people who have health issues and like, oh, this is really been bothering me, but I'm just going to ignore it. And I'm amazed by how many people will do this because they're afraid of what could happen. And I tell people, you cannot procrastinate, deny or ignore. Those are dangerous things to do, because you're setting yourself up for a, life ambush. I give the example of a friend who was overweight who was successful business guy, but he was overweight. He wasn't taking care of himself physically.

The doctor was like, hey, you really need to start taking care of yourself and start working out. You need to watch your nutrition, you're a ticking time bomb for a heart attack. And, you know, he talked to me about working out and I said, yeah, you can do this. You do that and he never really did it. And then like a year later he had a heart attack and he's like, why did this happen? The signs were there, but no, you ignored them. And so many people do this in life.

Transform your Mind Stitcher
Transform your Mind Stitcher

How does situational awareness help in an ambush

Myrna: You also teach about, situational awareness. Tell us what that is.

Jason: So, I teach, situational awareness, in this society, that has to do with awareness and reaction time. We live in this world where we're all stuck scrolling our cell phones and I can't tell you how many people I have watched walking around, and they're totally absorbed in that cell phone, which means they're not paying attention to the world around them. I'm highly trained. I try to train other people up to a basic level. One of the things that we do in our, overcoming survive workshop is awareness and get out of that situation before it ever occurs.

So, you see things before they happen, you see the signs of the ambush. You are noticing the indicators before it ever develops into an ambush and you don't allow yourself to get on the X, the point of attack. You don't walk into that situation. So sometimes you can't help it. And that's where awareness and a little bit of training come in. I really encourage everybody out there to have some level of training for self-defense. I know that your target audience is women. I know there are a lot of women who are afraid of firearms. But I really encourage you learn to use a firearm.

We live in a country that whether you agree with it or not. A firearm can be the great equalizer if someone is coming after you and trying to break into your house or trying to rape or take your kids.  There is a level of training that needs to exist with that and I firmly believe we should get that.

Book: Point Man Planner
Book: Point Man Planner

The Point Man Planner

Tell us about your book The Point Man Planner. What you hope people to walk away with after getting this planner?

Jason: The Point Man Planner, came from the things that I've put in my life. They're also things that I saw in the military and some of these things are interchangeable. I just use a military Special Operations term. So, the idea around this, is that there's four-point man principles that everybody should follow.

  1. Relentless belief in mission: This is what makes a successful point man and what makes successful Navy Seals, but also what makes anybody successful. Mission is synonymous with purpose. I know a lot of people who don't really know who they are. The beginning of the point man planner starts with what are your values?
  2. I mean a lot of people who don't truly know their values, they will they will throw out the cliché values that everybody likes to throw out.  Fitness, family, spirituality but they are the individual that's never in the gym. Now they aren't doing much with their family, they're sure not in church. So those aren't really their values. Your values are what drive your decision.
  3. Have a clearly defined destination and course. Your destination is your long-term goals where do you want to go 10 years from now, where do you want to be?

What a Point Man does

Myrna: Can I interject here? That was the most one of the most beautiful things when you said that when you were in a mission, your point man pinpoints the exact location, not somewhere around a city but the exact number on the map.

Jason: Yeah, so we have to be very specific because most people are not just oh, I want to be rich. Okay, well, what does that mean? You know, I want you know, I want a big house. Okay, well, where and what is your look like? So, you must be very specific to establish because if it's not very specific, that we can establish all the steps to get there, and that becomes our course.  The course becomes all the steps required to get to where we're going. And this is constantly changing our lives, change our hopes, tunes, our desires.

  1. Develop the, overcome mindset: We've established our course, we know our mission, we have our purpose. Well, how do we avoid the ambushes or at least try and reduce them and I'm constantly checking, where are we at? Are we on course and, overcome mindset, to get off the gas because guess what? Life ambushes, are coming. I tell people you're either in a, life ambush, you're coming out, or there's one on the horizon.

Conclusion

You can pick up the Point Man Planner on Amazon or you can find everything on my website www.Jasonredman.com . Follow me on social media.  Every Monday I put out a video called Monday monster and it's just positive content on preparing for,  life ambushes.

Get 50% off 50% off the Pointman for Life Online Course: https://getoffx.com/pointman-for-life-course/?_ga=2.226718749.1473437284.1684181340-1169416450.1585072211

Additional Resources 

Life Mastery: 7 Habits to Create Success

Life Mastery: 7 Habits to Create Success

We attain, life mastery, by our daily habits. The habits we need to be cultivating daily has to include something physical, something spiritual, and personal development to build your brain.

In this episode, Sherry Fernandez, NYT Bestselling author talks about, Life mastery, how to develop the habits needed for success.

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Bio

Sherry Fernandez is the author of the New York Times, bestselling book ‘Life Mastery: Personal Progression Toward an Infinite Potential’. The book has sold tens of thousands of copies globally and has been featured on several leading media outlets. She has been a student of personal development for 40+ years.  What makes her program unique is that she practiced and refined the life mastery principles taught for decades, before deciding to share them with others.

Sherry helps people who are already living well and looking for ways to reach new heights in their personal growth, personal finances, or personal health, to see what’s possible. She helps her clients improve in their close relationships, careers, spiritual growth or starting new businesses.

Myrna: What are some habits that propel us to, life mastery?

Sherry: When I work with people, it goes beyond the big vision of what we want, for example, like who we want to marry. I knew what I wanted. I never wanted to ever get married and have children, but then I had one and then I decided to keep that child. My parents did not give me my drive. They had nine marriages between them. So, I wanted something different. So I thought if I am going to do this, I'm gonna do the very best marriage possible. I don't think it's gonna be very fun. I thought it was gonna be horrible, but I loved the guy.

Transform Your Mind Podcast Pandora
Transform Your Mind Podcast Pandora

Wow!! I am proud that The Transform Your Mind Podcast is #1 on the list of

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Daily habits to master your marriage

So, I read every book I could find on, marriages. I had a vision of what I wanted my marriage to look like and so I started working on it.  I did the things that was the books said I should do and I even exceeded my vision of what a marriage should be. And we've been married for 45 years and still having the best sex. And so, all these things exceeded my vision. I put the principles to work early on and went to work on, life mastery.  It was a slow growth right but I just kept at it and kept at it until I developed the habits for, life mastery.  I was able to exceed my dreams. And I think that's how it works. You have this big dream or big goal and then you work on it, turns out even better than you thought it was going to be.

When we're moving forward, we're happy and you can prove that in a day. Do something move to move forward a little bit, some little thing and see how it makes you feel.  I've had people come to me and say I didn't have time to work out. And I would say. Commit to me to do something tomorrow. And then Tell me how it went and all they'll do what they always do. They do this yeah, I feel happier. It's one step. It's amazing day just one step forward and People are happier. You don't have to get there because you never get there anyway. It's just taking the steps forward that make you happy. And then they compound.

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Steps to building life mastery

Myrna: What are some of the steps that can get us to, life mastery?

Sherry: What you do every day is what's gonna make you successful your, daily habits. So, when I have a client come in, I don't ask them what they want to work on. We work on their goals but not the very first week.

  • First off, they need something physical,
  • We need to work on something spiritual. If they're religious people, they know that there's something there in their religion they need to be doing or maybe they need to pick up something spiritual. Practice meditation is something spiritual.
  • You need something for your brain. You need to be educating yourself and learning and growing all the time. Preferably something in your field and some things that are outside your field every day.

So those 3 habits will get a lot of people started on, life mastery. There's gonna be some habits that must be forever disrupted the same way. But education must be an ongoing forever habit. Physical Fitness has to be an ongoing, every day, forever habit. spiritual practices must be every day and you can't miss. You can’t say I will pray tomorrow; today’s prayer is for today. Tomorrow’s prayer is for tomorrow.

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Daily habits build life mastery

You must work out every day. You cannot say, I will work out 5 mins today and 60 mins tomorrow to make up for today. I learned this the hard way. I had 6 kids, that means all the ballgames and all the dance lessons and all the laundry and all that stuff. And sometimes I think I'm too busy to do my personal self-care like physical fitness. But I had to do it no exception. If I didn’t spend any time on self-care, I felt less happy at the end of the day.

We're happy when we take care of our health, take care of ourselves and do personal development, then go out in the world and make a difference. If I didn't get the laundry done. I could live with that. I can do that tomorrow. But If I didn’t do my personal development practices, I couldn’t live with that.  And you don't save time by skipping it.

Myrna: Yeah, so you know your, life mastery habits, are  foundational. So, let's touch on, personal finances. You saying that if you want to make lots of money, it's a good driver for, Life Mastery. And I think, what you basically saying is that, goals, are a driver of, personal finances. If you have a goal of doing something then you will achieve it. So how do you teach your clients to want lots of money and then go ahead and make it happen?

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Seven steps to making lots of money

Sherry: There's are seven areas they need to work on to make lots of money:

  1. Spirituality,
  2. Relationships,
  3. fitness,
  4. education,
  5. money,
  6. vocation,
  7. character

And so, money it's only one piece of a piece pie, but it is important. So, they set their own goals. I work with a lot of entrepreneurs. So, we do a lot of entrepreneurial kinds of goals, for example doing more good in the world.

Jim Rohn said make a million dollars for what it can do for others.

Make a lot of money, you are gonna touch a ton of lives, you're gonna get to spread that money around. You can do so much good both with the money and with the resources. Elon Musk went to the moon with his money. He wants to build a transportation system into space.  That is doing good with your money.

Learn, apply, live, learn how to support yourself, then learn how to been able to support some other people like your family. And then when your finances good, and you've learned a whole bunch of stuff. Then you can go find another way. You can choose how you serve.  I can choose how I serve because I have the financial resources to serve any how I want.

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Life mastery habit: track your daily habits

Myrna: Tell us about your, life mastery, classes and how we can get in touch with you.

Sherry: I'm a big believer in simple systems.  So, I believe the simple steps that I teach, the first one is you got to track your, daily habits. You got to just track your daily habits, daily.

Peter Drucker said “What gets measured gets managed”

Your, daily tracker, will track your daily habits and that's how you develop, life mastery habits. So, on my website there is a daily tracking chart you can download for free.  It just lists the, daily habits, you want to do down the left hand column. It's like a calendar the days of the month across the top and you just you write down your activity like, meditation, workout, eat clean, floss my teeth, 20 minutes of devotion etc. These are the, daily habits, you want to track.

You have got to set the parameters. You must say what is the workout? Thinking very clear, what constitutes a workout? Is it 5 mins or 45 mins? Because if you don’t and you work out for 5 mins when you should be working out for 45 mins, workout doesn’t get crossed off the list on your, daily tracker. If your daily step count is 14,000 steps and you do 13,900, it doesn’t count. Then you didn't get it done.

Book: Life Mastery
Book: Life Mastery

Affirmations build life mastery

The, daily tracker, also works for, affirmations. One of my affirmations is that I have I laugh easily and often. So, what that means is so about eight to 10 of those every day on things that don't really matter so they can be they can reinforce another habit. Another affirmation could be, I get up early. You put it on the tracking sheet. I have an affirmation about being aware of my thoughts and working on mindfulness.

I have about five to about 13 affirmations. But I would suggest people you can go ahead and do about 10 affirmations for, life mastery.

Myrna: What’s your website? Also tell us about your Book “Life Mastery, Personal Progression Towards An infinite Potential.”

Sherry: My website is www.LifeMasteryinfo.com. Life Mastery was taken. You can email me any time about anything and I will respond. My email is sherry@lifeMastereryinfo.com.  My mission now because I made enough money so I can get what I want is to make a difference.

Additional Resources

Mind Power: The Amazing Power of Your Mind

 

Setting Goals In Clock Time vs Psychological Time

Setting goals, in, clock time, means we are not emotionally attached to them. We are able to enjoy the journey and not just the destination.  But when you, set goals, in,  psychological time, you are never fulfilled when you achieve them.  You have heard of people who, set goals, and when they attain these goals, they are only happy for a brief moment and then they are unfulfilled again. That is because they are psychologically attached to the goal. The subconscious mind is telling them that until this goal is achieved, happiness is not possible. Or until this goal is achieved, they are not successful.

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Setting goals in psychological time

Let’s say owning a house on the beach is your symbol of success and you tell yourself that until you live on the beach in a beautiful mansion, you cannot feel fulfilled or feel successful. This means that you are not going to enjoy the journey.  You are psychologically tied to living on the beach as your means to the end.

Or let’s take the goal of being married. Most women have this goal.

Marriage could be a symbol of acceptance that you are enough, because someone says you complete them, or they can’t live without you etc. Marriage could symbolize the success you dreamed of as a little girl.

But what happens when you achieve this goal? Does it create lasting happiness? The divorce rate is 50% or higher. Nothing wrong with that goal but do you stop living until you get married.  Are you enjoying all the perks of being single?

Does achieving any goal fulfill you forever? You know the answer to the question.

No it does not.

Podbean Transform your Mind Podcast
Podbean

Setting goals in clock time

That is because goals set using, psychological time, says that until this event happens, you will not be happy or successful or fulfilled.  When you achieve these goals, you are happy for a few days and then you are not.

Goals set with, psychological time, never fulfills because the goal post is always moving.

It is okay to set goals, but you must enjoy the present moment.

You must enjoy where you are now.

If you ask yourself what is lacking now, the answer should always be nothing.

Goal setting, in,  clock time, says If success comes, I will accept it, but if it doesn’t, I am okay with that too.

Transform your Mind Stitcher
Transform your Mind Stitcher

That is why we can’t tell ourselves that until something happens in life then we will be happy, fulfilled, complete etc. because not only can you die waiting for this goal to manifest, but if you achieve this goal, you will still not be complete or happy. Why because you have to take care of the inside before things on the outside.

When you take care of your inside, joy is always your partner. You are happy with or without.  You are happy for the breath of life.  If you add success to this you will find fulfillment.

Additional Resources

How To Conquer The 5 Most Common Causes of Failure

How to Create Your Own Matrix In The Game Of Life

What “The Matrix” the movie was trying to show is that we're inside of a game, we're, consciousness, inside of the,  game of life. And so, our reality is a merging of the, game of life, outside the body.  When Noe realized he could control the game he says, why don't I change it? Why don’t I change the rules? Why don't I change the way I interact with it? Why don't I populate it? And that is where he's able to start to control his reality, and create his own matrix. We can all do the same thing.

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Bio

Alana Aviel is a guide to Mastering the Creation of your Reality. Alana Aviel of AKIATA is an Oracle, Channel, Teacher, and Spiritual Guide/Activator working primarily in the Quantum Realm. Following a powerful near-death experience, Alana has humbly stepped fully into her service as a guide and teacher in the Akasha and assists in total obliteration of old paradigm patterns and limitations to being. Her work focuses on identifying the cues of one’s reality and activating our natural powers as the creator of our Reality to live an aware and empowered life.

Myrna: Tell us about your near-death experience?

Alana: I was in a motorcycle accident where I was in a coma and have a severe brain injury. It was actually the conclusion of one, soul's journey, and the initiation of my soul's journey. So that was the start of my adventure. And it's what's called a, walk-in soul, experience. So where one soul kind of says, okay, I'm ready to conclude my journey here on Earth, and it creates an opportunity for another soul to kind of hop in and continue the journey.

Myrna: Take us on a chronological journey.

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Near Death experience and a walk in soul

Alana: Yeah, so most people are born you know, they're a baby they live a life they grow up they have school, they have childhood memories, maybe some trauma, all those experiences. And you know, when we understand the, near-death experience, somebody kind of hops out of the game for a minute and comes back right? What I'm saying is I'm actually a different soul continuing the journey of the person who created this body. So, I don't have childhood memories. I don't have a point of reference. That was a story of a soul that preceded me and I kind of came in midstream.

Myrna: Wow. In the, near-death experience, a new soul walks in.  I have never heard this before.

Alana: This is what some people call a, walk-in soul. But for me, the most powerful kind of contrast is, I don't come with the context of a life experience that most people have, most people have childhood memories. They have, you know, trauma that you can inquire or, you know, an impact about beliefs or an impression of, you know, things that they learned in school, because I kind of came in midstream, I have the benefit of some of the memories that Alana kind of left me.

Myrna: What was the experience that the original soul left that a new soul came in? You mentioned something about a motorcycle accident.

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The soul agreement and game of life

Alana: In 2007 the original Alana experienced severe head injury, in a motorcycle accident and was in a coma for a good amount of time. And I would say that was the time that we kind of changed places you could say during that coma, whatever her soul had chosen was saying okay, this is going to be the conclusion of my adventure here on this earth game. I'm sure that she and I created a, soul agreement, that I would pick up where she left off.  And so I woke from the coma, started to understand, oh, this is the new life experience. These are some of the rules. These are some of the ways that she lives. These are some of the things that she did, these are some of the people that she knew, and I kind of just picked up the roll from there and carried on.

Myrna: How does a, walk-in soul, take us to the, matrix?

Alana: Yeah, so, you know, we use this term, matrix, or we use this term like the, game of life. Basically, it's an experience inside of, consciousness. And the interesting thing is people identify the, matrix, or the ego as the limitations, the obstacles, the challenges, the lack or the struggle of trauma, those types of things, right. And sometimes people identify the matrix as this force outside of us, like the government or you know, all of these other limitations; but in reality, what you need to see is the limitations are how our subconscious designs our, game of life.

The matrix or, game of life, is to be played based on what our soul identifies as wanting to experience inside of, consciousness. And so, when I talk about limiting suffering, it can be as simple as changing the way one identifies inside of consciousness. Because the way that we identify inside of, consciousness, will define the experience that we have.

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What is consciousness

Myrna: Well, you know, that 99.9% of people don't even know, what is consciousness. We just show up play the, game of life. We're in the matrix and you know, it's tumbling us around and we're reacting to outside stimulus. But consciousness is a big word. And even though I'm in the space of, awareness and, consciousness, and, trying to create my own reality. I know that I'm not at the top of the game.  So, when you are saying that we're limited in our, consciousness. Explain for the layman what that means.

Alana: So there's four ways to experience reality. And as you said, 99% of people have that perspective that life happens to them that they're kind of a victim to circumstances. So, they are at the entry level of the, game of life. When people have an awakening, they start to experience a level of consciousness where they start to realize, I'm actually the observer in the game. I'm able to transcend these limitations and look at them with a different context, a more divine perspective.  All of a sudden they are able to take themselves outside of that victim-hood and say, wait, there's something else going on here.

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The matrix illustrates how to play the game of life

And that's what the movie “The Matrix Movie” kind of illustrates. He takes the red pill or the blue pill and all of a sudden, he realizes the game isn't what he thought it was. Similar thing happens when people have an awakening. So, the stage that comes after the observer, is we're starting to notice okay, I can see the way this works a little bit differently. It's not necessarily happening to me, but I'm participating in it in a way that I can't quite explain. Then we get to manifesting what we want in this, matrix.

I know a lot of people who are really getting on to the idea of manifesting using affirmations, using depth of beliefs to create inside their experience. So now you're not only just observing life, but you're playing as a creator. In my experience, I can create my prosperity through my belief, I can create my relationships in a different way through my belief, now I understand myself, and we really have kind of left the victim hood and started to be more of a creator. When you play the, game of life, as a creator, it’s like putting their heart, their skin, their dreams, and their imagination into action.

And then once you really get to a place where you are merging with, divine consciousness, which can be known to some people as enlightenment, you know, we've had a lot of ascended masters that have set this example Buddha, Jesus all the other ones, right. This is where reality can be perceived as being created in real time, exclusively from our mindset. And so, this is where everything in our experience is a manifestation of the mind.

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The matrix is the quantum field

Myrna: Sure, so from what I remember of the, matrix, you know, there was a body, sitting in a chair, and he took the pill and he was going to the Oracle and the Oracle said that he was the One.  But that reality of the matrix didn't actually affect the body. Right? Because there's one time he got shot in the matrix and he was sitting a chair still alive. So, help us play the game where we're in a matrix, which is the, quantum field, and then we're in our body. How does that work?

Alana: Well, I mean, there's a lot of layers to it. The first thing that I find is most valuable for everybody is we're all the guy. We are all the One. So everybody is in their own unique matrix.  What “The Matrix” the movie was trying to show is that we're inside of a game, we're, consciousness, inside of a game. And so, our reality is a merging of the, game of life, outside the body.  When he realized he could control the game he says, why don't I change it? Why don’t I change the rules? Why don't I change the way I interact with it? Why don't I populate it? And that is where he's able to start to control his reality, which is what we're talking about.

And he's able to watch himself participating in real time, which is like what manifesting is, you know, you set your intention or what Dr Joe Dispenza talks about and “Becoming Supernatural” you can heal yourself, but only because you made yourself aware of your capacity to do so. So, my cheat code that the matrix illustrates so beautifully is that our mindset is everything. How we identify is everything. We identify ourselves as always running after our next paycheck. The paychecks are going to keep running away from us. If we identify ourselves as somebody where money is running to us, money will run to us.

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The Game of Life leaves clues

The game of life, this movie The Matrix, that's a clue, the book The Secret, that's a clue. And there's so many clues that are kind of naturally built into the game. And one of my favorite ways to understand the clues is to look at the life of children. Because children know how to play the, game of life. They haven't picked up the muck that kind of makes us forget. And so, what do they do? Kids play dress up, they use their imagination. They pick up a block, it becomes a car, right? Kids know how to play the, game of life, and then we pick up beliefs and the baggage from society. And just increase our degrees of forgetting until we find it again.

Myrna: How we can get in touch with you if you're on social media. Tell us your handles.

Alana: Yeah, beautiful. My handle on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/akiataetheric/ and Tiktok is @akiatsetheric. If they follow me I share a lot of juicy mind bending ideas and concepts. But most importantly I have this experience called the mirror dimension. And if you go to mirror-dimension.com You'll find my membership there we meet weekly to learn how to read your reality. It's really easy, accessible, low-cost program for people to come in and start to learn about themselves to learn about the conscious experience playing a, game of life, learning all the cues.

I find it very important for us to include unpacking people's personal experiences as demonstrations of what does this clue mean? What did that challenge what was that challenge trying to say? So, we workshop in real time in the mirror dimension to learn how to be better creators in our reality.  It's a really incredible workshop style experience for people to come and learn and grow.

Additional Resources

How to Win at the Game of Life

 

Rules Game Of Life: Know Where You Want To Go

Rules game of life,  # 1 Know where you want to go. A lot of us have goals, but we focus on all of them at the same time and that is why most of us never accomplish any of them.

There is a Guyanese proverb that says that you can be a “Jack of all trades, master of none.” That means if you have all these trades, you can never be great at any.

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Focus on one thing at a time

The captain of a ship knows he can only dock at one port at a time. A quarterback in a football game knows the goal of the drive is to get to the end zone and score a touchdown. Once he has accomplished one touchdown then he starts planning for the next touchdown. Rules of the game, both the Captain and the quarterback knows to, focus on one thing, at a time.

So, the first rule of success in the, game of life, is knowing where you want to go. You set one goal and, focus on one thing,  concentrate all your energies on that goal first, then after you accomplish that goal then you move on to the next goal.

Let’s say where you want to go is to save $20,000 for a down payment on your first home. That is the direction you want to go in, you shouldn’t have that goal of saving $20,000 and another goal of let’s say getting your Master’s degree at the same time.  Chances are you will accomplish neither. Since you should, focus on one thing, at a time.  First focus on your down payment and then after you move into your home, then you could focus on getting your Master's degree.

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Game of Life: Your rewards equal effort

In the, game of life, your reward is in direct proportion to your service. So how will you earn this $20,000?  You have to provide a service to get it.  Don’t dream of winning the lottery.

We just watched the Super Bowl game.  Let’s look at Chiefs quarterback Patrick Mahomes as an illustration of having one primary goal and working only on that goal. Patrick Mahomes is rewarded handsomely for his service for his ability to score touchdowns. He is paid millions and I mean millions because of this ability. He has studied his craft and become the best and his knowledge of the game and how to achieve his goal of getting to the end zone, makes him valuable to any team. He concentrates of one drive at time, that is his, focus is on one thing. One touchdown at a time, one game at a time with the end goal of a championship.

So, you need to do the same. What skills do you need to have to accomplish your primary goal today?  What do you have to do to become the best at what you do. Since service is in direct proportion to reward, how will you increase your service?

Transform Your Mind Podcast Podvine
Transform Your Mind Podcast Podvine

Rules Game of life

These are the, rules game of life, know where you want to go and, focus on one thing, at a time. This message is for me as well. I am speaking to myself. I have lots of goals and I was working on all of them at the same time and that is why I wasn’t gaining traction. I have 6 goals and I was concentrating on all of them.  Now that I understand the, rules game of life, I have picked one goal and am focusing all my attention on this goal. I already work on improving my skills every day. I already learn something new every day. Since my rewards is in direct proportion to my service, I am confident that my rewards will come. I know if you build it, they will come. 

Remember the quote from Alice in Wonderland “if you don’t know where you are going then it doesn’t matter where you end up.”

So become one of the 5% of the population who know the, rules game of life, they know where they are going and is working the playbook, setting up plays, celebrating first downs and getting to the end zone. You must have singular focus, you must know that people are out to stop you, and you must know where they are and avoid a collision.  Patrick Mahomes played through an injury, you must know that you will have challenges and problems on your way to your goals, successful people succeed in spite of their challenges.

Thanks for tuning into this week’s episode of 5 min Fridays with coach Myrna

Additional Resources 

The Game of Life: Making Lemonade Out Of Lemons

 

How to Transform your Career with Purpose

For some people their, career, is closely interwoven with their, life purpose. Keshia Morris, is that person, Political Activist and Project Manager with Common Cause.

In this interview on the Transform your Mind radio hour and podcast, Life Coach and Mom Myrna Morris Young, trace the story of, Keshia Morris, as an undocumented alien, to her starting her career as a Psychologist, to getting a tug from God to transform her, career with purpose, to help with our democracy.

Listen to full interview here:

Introduction to a Career with Purpose

Keshia Morris is  the project manager for the, Census 2020, with Common Cause and is getting a lot of media attention because of the Trump's administration efforts to add the question “Are you a Citizen” to the, Census 2020.

Keshia Morris, talks about the importance of the Census, the reason the Trump administration was trying to add this question and, Common Cause, fight for a fair democracy.

The media attention started when, Keshia Morris,   wrote an amazing article that was published in the Miami Herald that highlighted her, career, with purpose.  In this article she talked about our personal journey to becoming permanent residents in the United States and why the question on the Census asking “Are you a Citizen?” would have a negative affect on our democracy.

After that article was published, several podcasts and radio personalities wanted to interview her.

Before we could get to what God has done in Keshia’s life as far as her chosen, career, with purpose.  She chose me to be her mother. I knew from the moment she was conceived that she was born to do great things. She was conceived on my honeymoon and was born 9 months later on my 30th birthday. So even without being conscious I knew that she was born with a, life purpose.

Again without being yet conscious; but understanding the principle of generational increase,  I started my journey to becoming an American Citizen.  I believed that there were more opportunities for my children here in the USA.

Both my children are Canadian,  and maybe my  assumption was incorrect, but our perceptions become our reality.

Keshia Morris,  went through high school as an, undocumented alien. The beauty of this country is that children didn't require papers to go to public school until higher education. Without a vision, I could have sent her back to Canada to go to college; but that was not even a consideration. I paid out of state fees for  her first 2 years of college. I could only afford one class; but she was in College.

I got married again in 2006 and my husband sponsored both of us, and we became  permanent residents or documented immigrants.

Keshia received her BA  and started out on her intended career as a  Psychologist.

How Keshia's Became On Purpose, career coaching

One day while listening to the audio book “A long walk to Freedom,” by Nelson Mandela, she had what is called a Damascus experience. Everything that was before was no more. So this is where I want to pick up the story.

Setting Goals and purpose for your career?

I want to start off by saying that you tell my story so much better than I do. Just laying out for our listeners how I got to the moment where I decided I wanted to do something new with my career.  I had always thought that I that I was going to be a psychologist.  As a child people kept telling me that oh you know you're great at giving people advice, so I thought  I might as well make a career out of this and try to achieve the American dream.

Psychologists make a lot of money.  I started getting into listening to audio books in my car and as I listening to Nelson Mandela’s  “A long walk to freedom”  I would say in the very first few chapters of the book,  I feel like it changed me and changed my trajectory of my life almost immediately.  It was also the time of the sequester where the government was shut down.  I interpreted this as wealthy special interests groups were getting in the way of  government and our lawmakers not being able to do their jobs.   I didn't feel like this was right,  so I felt an extreme tug to try to do something about it.

I had already invested over 4 years as a Psychology major and started with my masters degree credits which were not inexpensive.  I had already amassed about $30,000 in student loans before  listening to Nelson Mandela's book.  I felt an immense tug from God that becoming a political activist was my, career purpose, I wanted to help change the democracy the United States of America.

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How to look for signs that your, career, is on  Purpose

Question #2: How did you know that this was God. What were the signs?

I knew it was God because it changed the trajectory of my life in seconds.  I was now a new woman and had a firm grasp on what my, career, should be.

Things lined up for you. I was a new Life Coach at the time and you requested a coaching session. I remember it,  like it was yesterday. Because what I said out loud was not what I was thinking. I told you to go for it. To make a plan and pursue this goal.

  • You applied to schools and got into your number 1 choice, American University,
  • Before graduation you got an internship at your number 1 choice for employment, Common Cause,
  • You received a job offer with, Common Cause, immediately after graduation. So we know that you were on, career purpose, because God opened doors.

Why family support and career coaching is so important to your career

Question # 3: What advice would you give our listeners who face obstacles. No family support, not accepted to schools, kids at home etc.

I would tell them to believe in the vision that you can have it all.  Believe in yourself, believe in God and believe in their, career purpose,

Keshia Morris, you are getting National attention now as the Project Manager for  the 2020 Census at Common Cause. The Trump administration has been very unfriendly towards immigrants and, undocumented aliens, and intended to use the question “Are you a Citizen?” on the, Census 2020, to instill fear to the non-Citizens,  so as to set up, Gerrymandering.  Common Cause fought for this question to be removed from the Census and won.

Question # 4 Please explain the importance of having this question removed from the, Census 2020, and what exactly the Census does for our democracy.

Gerrymandering is  manipulating districts to give one party advantage over the other.  We have definitely seen a lot of gerrymandering being done by Republicans;  but we do absolutely know that Democrats do it as well.

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iHeart Radio

What is the Census 2020?

The Constitution mandates that a Census or accounts of all people that live within these United States be counted for apportionment purposes every ten years.  So every ten years the Census Bureau takes counts of everyone that lives here.  That is including illegal aliens, that is including children and newborns.  Everyone should get counted.

What this count does for our democracy is it apportioned the amount of seats in Congress.

There are 435 seats and the House of Representatives and those 435 seats are distributed based on population size.  Right now about each congressional district has about 700,000 people.

In a State like Florida, for example that has a population of maybe six to nine million people, but say only eight million people were counted in the, 2020 census, that means that Florida would get less congressional representation than it actually truly deserves because one million people were not counted.

The Trump administration wanted to add this last minute question “Are you a Citizen”  to the, Census 2020, I say last minute because usually each question is tested and vetted thoroughly for about three years before a question can be added to the census. It has to go through Congress and an approval processes.  The Trump administration came in and decided they were not gonna do any of that, and just announced that they were going to add this question to the,  Census 2020,

Census Bureau researchers have found that if this question were to be added to the,  Census 2020, about 6.5 million people would not answer the census form and thus insure a fair census.  So advocates like, Common Cause, but really across the board, millions of people stood up and said that this is wrong.  Common Cause, took the case all the way to the Supreme Court and the Supreme Court sided with us.  They said that the Trump administration cannot add this question to the, Census 2020, they called the reason the Trump administration gave to add this question, contrived.

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TuneIn Radio

Myrna: I heard you say in one of your interviews that the data that comes from the, Census 2020, is confidential and  it's illegal for anybody to use this information for harm to the people. I know you said that if this question was on the, Census 2020, 6.5 million people would not have answered because they might be afraid that someone will come to their door.  But what you said is that information is never presented in such a way that somebody can know who filled out the form, and if they were going to actually use information from the data, they will use the information as a collective.

I am curious as to why research shows that 6.5 million people WOULD NOT  have responded to the, Census 2020, if the question “Are you a Citizen” was on the form?

Keshia Morris: My answer to that question is twofold.

The law states that your responses on the census cannot be used to cause harm to any person.   That means that it can't be sent to ICE to enforce immigration law.  It can't even be sent to your landlord if you have too many people living in in your household.  However, what the Trump administration wanted to do, was to create fear.  That information isn't always communicated correctly and even if it was, people don't trust that the Trump administration would follow the law.

So it's better just not to have the question on the, Census 2020, whatsoever.

The Trump administration has given up on their efforts to add the question “Are you a Citizen” on Census 2020, but they are now trying another way to get this information. President Trump has now issued an executive order to get administrative data to be collected for the purpose of redistricting.  Common Cause, is fighting for this not to be the case, and it  absolutely will be challenged through litigation.

Facts about the, Census 2020,

Section 2 of the Constitution requires a count every 10 years of every person residing in the United States—citizens and non-citizens, newborns and seniors, documented and undocumented, homeowners, renters, and the homeless. The, 2020 Census, will be in full swing during the Winter, Spring and Summer of 2020.

Counting hundreds of millions of people is an immense undertaking, and it’s critical for state legislators to start preparing now. Census data determine the allocation of more than $800 billion in annual federal funding and are often used in state and local policy-making, decision- making, and research. An inaccurate census in 2020 would jeopardize state funds for over 300 federal programs and compromise crucial supports for marginalized communities. 

Census data are also used for the reapportionment and redistricting processes and therefore vital to advancing a fair and representative democracy. Ensuring that all residents in your state are counted will require funding, coordination, and commitment from policymakers but will provide your constituents the resources and representation they deserve.

Research shows that if the question “Are you a Citizen” was on the, Census 2020, 6.5 million people would not fill in the Census thereby states would be unrepresented by millions in congress.

Myrna: From listening to all your numerous interviews I will list them. I have learned that the Census data is confidential and it is illegal for anyone to use that data to target aliens.

Unrig the System Podcast with Alex Wardlaw

Podcast Episode for Bipartisan Solutions for Ending the Prison-Industrial Complex Once and For All

Carry On Friends The Caribbean American Podcast

The Real New Network

Myrna: I have had a front row seat to your growth from a Psychology major into a political activist. I have watched you take the mike and rally a crowd. I have listened you spout very technical data about the history of our democracy with names and dates of legal documents.  As your mother, I am impressed by your transformation.

http://blog.myhelps.us/how-to-become-lifted-by-your-purpose/

How to Master career strengths

Question # 6: Take us through how you released your fear of public speaking. What did you do to get yourself from this abstract fear of speaking and communicating to what you do now?

I am still working on being an effective communicator and working past my fear.  My fear has lessened a bit,  there was a time where I mean I couldn't get in front of people and I couldn't say two words without my voice shaking, without saying um a hundred times, without looking completely lost. So yeah  I definitely think that I have I've experienced some growth and really all I can say, well the main thing I can say that got me around the corner is practice.

There's that Malcolm Gladwell books that says you need like 10,000 hours of practicing something to be an Expert.  You just named a bunch of the interviews that I've done; but you know each of those interviews requests, I started off by saying NO.  because the fear is still there.  But I able to overcome the fear by resting in the fact that this is for a, life purpose, and  I am working towards the goal of having this democracy be the best that it can be.

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Transform your Mind Soundcloud podcast

How to Transform your, Career, with  purpose

As we wrap up our show today, I want to leave you with these thoughts.

There is a difference between living an active life and a, purpose driven life. We all lead active lives. To be active does not mean we even have to physically do anything. We could be mentally active and be making plans and, setting goals,  etc. but not going anywhere. But when we are living a, purpose driven life, our energy and activities has a, life purpose, and meaning. Pause to reflect the purpose of your chosen, career. What is the meaning of your, career, purpose.  What is the quality of the energy you are expending. When you have a, career,  of purpose, the more energy you expend, the more renewed you are. On the other hand, when you are not on, life purpose, the energy you expend is not renewed, instead you end your day depleted and diminished.

A, purpose driven life, and, purpose driven career, alters the course of history.  I hope you all find yours.

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iHeart Radio

Keshia Morris, one final question What do you want your contribution to be to God’s Kingdom?

To make this country's democracy the best it can be, that is my, career purpose,

How can any of our listeners get in contact with common cause to support the organization, volunteer for the census or reach you for speaking engagements or interviews?

Listeners and readers can reach me at

Keshia Morris
Census & Mass Incarceration Project Manager
Common Cause
805 Fifteenth St, NW, Suite 800
Washington, DC 20005
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 Additional Resources for, Career Purpose, and Census 2020

http://blog.myhelps.us/how-to-become-lifted-by-your-purpose/

http://blog.myhelps.us/how-to-become-a-diamond-by-finding-your-purpose/

http://blog.myhelps.us/program-positive-change/

Today’s Ruling on the Census Citizenship Question Still Leaves Room for Worry

 

Ep. 116 – The Census: All the Facts & Why It is Important