What Is Love: How to Love Your Way To a Better Life

What is love? Love doesn’t require us to build a deep connection. We fall in love with babies all the time. We don’t need a deep connection with them. They don’t even have to reciprocate. I think we have to let go of the old idea that I have to be somebody or do something in order to realize this love that’s already here.

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Bio Humble the Poet on Love

The truth is, we all want love. Everything we do is in pursuit of it. But as we count likes on social media and measure our worth by the numbers in our bank accounts, we are programmed to see love as something to earn or win. That programming obscures the simple truth behind what we are: beautiful, infinite, eternal sources of love.

For Humble the Poet, the concept of love has been a decade-long curiosity. What began as reciting spoken-word poetry in coffee shops to impress girls, evolved into a creative adventure that has spanned the last 10 years, crossing genres, mediums, and oceans. In How To Be Love(d), the former elementary school teacher turned rapper, spoken-word artist, poet, and international bestselling author teaches his fans that instead of seeking to be loved by the world, we must be love.

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What is love? what are we doing wrong

Myrna: Wat are most of us doing wrong when it comes to love?

Humble: I think we believe that we have to, find love. And then we have to qualify for, love. And none of that’s the case. I think we need to stop telling people you’re worthy of love, and you’re enough for love. Love is constant, it’s always there. And what we actually need to do is just clear away the clutter to realize we don’t have to do anything magical or specific to, earn love, and have, love, find us. It’s the breeze, we just have to open up our sails to catch up.

Myrna: I love that. So, we’ve got different kinds of love. So, we’ve got God’s love, which is always everlasting. Then we’ve got, parental love, which is always everlasting. But, romantic love, where you know a man meets girl or Girl Meets Boy kind of thing. We feel that we have to earn, romantic love, love is it’s an energy, right? It’s a spirit. So, is that why you’re saying we don’t need to earn, love?

Humble: Yeah, I wouldn’t even differentiate. I think instead of saying there’s, there’s, God’s love, there’s parental love, there’s, romantic love. I would say there’s, pathways of love. So, the permanence of the pathway between us and the Almighty. And permanence is the, pathway of love, between us and our parents. Now when we create new relationships, we’re building a pathway and that’s why those pathways are less shaky. So, if I meet someone for the first time, we’re beginning to create a path for love the, energy of love, to flow between us, right? It’s not the love that is temporary. It’s the path that’s temporary.

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Love’s pathways needs maintenance

So, what is love, it depends on your, pathway to love. The, pathway of love, between us and our parents or us in the Almighty. These pathways have been established, we have to do work to maintain them and clear the clutter from them, obviously, but we don’t have to do as much work than for example that we have a romantic partner. We have somebody we work with, we have an activity, these we have to do a lot more work to established a clear pathway. And there’s a lot more day to day maintenance that’s required for that.

We look at the previous pathways that we have, and we’re like, those are so easy. So, making these new pathways with this person who I want to be my husband or wife should be just as easy. The day to day maintenance is not sexy. It’s like brushing your teeth. But unromantic work is required to keep, Love, maintained.

Brushing your teeth isn’t a trip to Paris and it’s the same thing with creating, pathways of love, between us and other people. It can’t be big gestures; it’s got to be the small things. It’s got to be the uneventful things. It’s got to be the uncomfortable conversations. It’s got to be all of that. So, I don’t differentiate between, love. I differentiate the pathways and how we build them. That’s the, love story.

Myrna: Please explain what you’re talking about a pathway because I’m like here and I’m thinking like a highway.

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Love’s pathways is like a 4 lane highway

Humble: How to love, is like a highway or a river because the highway moves quickly. Things can move quickly on the highway so, let’s say that you know the highway of the, pathway to love, would be the cars and you know if you have a beautiful well paved highway with a lot of wide lanes and it’s built super strong, a lot of, love, can flow through it. Now if you have one that’s not been maintained and has a lot of potholes and it’s crumbling, and then random pieces of garbage in the middle of the road, then everything’s gonna move slow or be obstructed.

So, the work that we have to do is not only to build the pathway, but to clear the pathway regularly. So, what would what would those potholes be? What would the damage be? That’s going to be our insecurities, that’s going to be our need to be liked, or people pleasing. That’s going to be our egocentric behavior. That’s going to be our self-esteem or self-respect. That’s going to be us being unwilling to be vulnerable. Think about it. When you’re not vulnerable. You’re putting up a wall. Now imagine putting that wall on a highway hoping to be able to get rid of a wall. You have to clear the wall. Right? And it’s not an overnight thing it’s going to take time to do but we have to measure progress.

You don’t have to do anything to receive love

You don’t have to be perfect and worthy of love to get qualified for love and if you have love for someone, they have to reciprocate it and it’s like no we are a source of love. The work that we’re doing to create and keep the highways clean, so we can love can flow to you. Some of us are creating and maintaining those highways, it’s easier for some people in our lives and others. No, that doesn’t mean it’s impossible. It just means it’s easier for others, you know, and it doesn’t require the things that we think it doesn’t require history. It doesn’t require being perfect.

Myrna: I love it. I think that is the beautiful analogy. So, we’ve got this highway, right and we want to get somewhere. We want to get married. We want to be loved, so I’ve got this highway, but I want to get to this new love partner. But you’re right, I’ve got all these potholes and I’ve got all these walls and I got all this garbage. You mentioned what some of these things are insecurities like self-esteem. You know, maybe baggage from somebody that’s hurt us. So, I’m on this highway that’s got all this stuff, but I’m not going anywhere because of all this clutter. So, in your book, do you tell people how to clear the, clutter.

Humble: Absolutely, the first thing I do is say you have to be aware of it. I’m gonna go as far as saying needing to get married is, clutter. So, what I’m saying is understanding what the, clutter, is super important and the, clutter, is not stopping you on a journey. The, clutter, is stopping love, from flowing in between you and the other person. So, our needs to have these external things outside of us is always going to be the first issue and then recognize as I said first thing is recognizing, clutter.

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Be aware of the clutter blocking love

The second thing is okay, that it exists. Okay, there’s nothing wrong with any of us for having, clutter. There’s nothing wrong with any of us. We’re having imperfections that nothing wrong with any of us are having insecurities, that nothing wrong with any of us from wanting to be liked and accepted by others. All of these things are, clutter, but there’s nothing wrong with us. Love is to accept that you have, clutter. So, we need to accept ourselves as we are. And now we need to focus on progress over perfection. If somebody was perfect, but not be able to be vulnerable and if they can be vulnerable, then you cannot connect with them.

Let’s abandon this idea that everything needs to be perfect. Let’s make baby steps every single day in the right direction and celebrate those baby steps. And from that standpoint, where is the love, isn’t finding a partner or, true love, it’s about being honest and saying I’ll be good either way. I’ll be good if I have a partner or if I am single. With a partner, I can build a, pathway of love, with them. And then both of us have two independent people pillars, not my better half, not you complete me, but instead, I am a pillar. They are a pillar. And now that we are two pillars, we can hold up more together something bigger than ourselves, whether that’s a family or an empire or generational increase.

Now we work together for a purpose bigger than ourselves, but also saying I am a, source of love, and I don’t require anything other than that. I’m not encouraging isolation. We are social creatures. Our human design is to be around people. But at the end of the day, what we’re creating is, pathways of love, to be created between us and anybody. The thing is the isolation is our ego thing that we’re separate from others. When we really tap deep into that, what we start to realize and I don’t and for me personally based on you know where my family comes from in the world.

God is love

We don’t differentiate God from love, this is the same energy. Because when you genuinely love somebody that’s when you begin to melt into them. That is, how to love, the type of relationship that is possible with everyone and everything. I think that the ultimate beauty is when you can actually honestly say I would be okay single.

I don’t require something outside of me to make me feel better or complete. They said we have a 56% divorce rate. We need to focus on nutrition instead of what’s delicious. And I think a lot of the reasons we chase these types of relationships because they’re delicious or not nutritious. How to love yourself, we need to establish healthier relationships with ourselves. That will also allow for healthy relationships with other people.

Myrna: Oh, yeah, self-love. We must have, self-love. We must be vulnerable. I know being a female, I’m not understanding how the male energy works, but female we have to be able to receive, we have to be able to make yourself vulnerable and be able to receive. You said that being aware of our imperfections and the potholes is the first step. You’re saying that we don’t need to get married to be complete, or to have a better but we don’t want to be in isolation and the Bible says Two are better than one. So, if we are, looking for love, how do we find it? This love that we want to attract? Where is the love?

You have to be vulnerable to let love in

Humble: I’m not here to say it’s better to be married versus single or what have you. The numbers are 56% divorce rate, so you can rush to get married and get in the wrong relationship and then you can end up being alone anyways. If a plane had a 56% chance of crashing, people aren’t going to get on to it. So, I think learning, how to love yourself, will set the tone for all the other relationships that you have. Okay?
That means you have to be, vulnerable, with yourself.
That means you have to accept your imperfections.
That means you have to go easy on yourself.
That means you have to date yourself.
That means you have to journal and get to know your deeper, darker side.
That means you have to pray.

Prayer is Important, prayer helps with self-awareness. Journaling helps with self-awareness. Dancing by yourself in your room, gets you more aware of how your body moves and feels and flows. That’s a level of intimacy with yourself. That’s important. There’s something called self-havening. When you hug yourself that is important.

We can hug ourselves, this level of intimacy with what we do for other people with intimacy with them and vulnerability. We can do that with ourselves. And what that allows us to do is set the tone of what we enjoy, what we don’t enjoy, what our boundaries are. And this is really important especially if you have a female audience, but we have to realize that the woman’s greatest power in a relationship is her, boundaries.

Women lose their value when the reduce their boundaries

Women cannot compete with other women. For a woman to compete with another woman for a man requires her to reduce her, boundaries, thus reducing the power, thus reducing her value. Men can compete with men. Because here’s the thing if I’m competing with another man, all I’m trying to do is look better, and make more money. And if I lose, I still look better and make more money. If a woman has to reduce her, boundaries, to get the man, she also lost her value. And the reason we are hesitant to maintain, boundaries, is we think they make us unlikable. That’s why we all say yes when we really mean No.

Myrna: Truth, when a woman competes with another woman for a man, she’s willing to do more than the other woman to keep the man.

Humble: A lot of us learnt to people please as children. Maybe you tried to win over a parent’s love one day and you weren’t received well. And then you internalized thinking it’s your fault. So, then you work harder. What you may not realize is your mom or dad just had a really bad day at work. You know, our mom and dad were also raised in a world where they may not know how to be emotionally available. And there’s a million reasons why but when you’re a child, you can’t understand that.

Myrna; So what advice do you have for people looking to find a partner? We’ve covered a little bit of it. You said that we don’t need a partner to complete us so we should be okay to be by ourselves. But let’s say I still want a partner. I want the, love pathways, to take me somewhere? What is love?

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Looking for love? Don’t sacrifice yourself

Humble: So, I’m not saying you don’t need a partner. What I’m saying is don’t sacrifice your, self-respect, for a partner. If you want just straight up, dating advice, one of the best pieces of advice that I got was relive, write out your entire love life. From your, first love, in kindergarten all the way up to today. Write the entire love life out. Talk about your best memories, talk about your worst memories Then go back with a highlighter and revisit the story, anything that makes you feel good highlight it. These are the qualities you want in a partner.

So for me, I had an ex-girlfriend when I was first starting this, you know, dating somebody and this is you know, 10 years ago and she said listen, the world needs to hear your voice. Stop doing everything else the world needs to hear in your voice. The world needs to hear your ideas. So, whenever I felt insecure hearing, her say that lit uplifted me. Later on, if I was dating somebody else and they’re like, look, you know work isn’t everything. Your mission isn’t everything. Money isn’t everything. I would be like; you’re not understanding what my purpose on this planet is. We’re not compatible.

So, I wrote that down somebody that understand the purpose of, Humble the Poet.

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How to Be loved

Myrna: Tell us about your book. Now normally this is the part where I asked why did you write it? And what do you want people to walk away with? But if you told me, you wrote it because you wanted to challenge the norms and challenge the way that people live their lives superficially. But what do you want to add to that?

How to Be Love(d): Simple Truths for Going Easier on Yourself, Embracing Imperfection & Loving Your Way to a Better Life

Humble: I want people to understand that even after you read the book, even after you hear this interview, I’m not a love guru. I’m not a love expert. What I am is I am somebody who had a failed relationship. And I was desperate to figure out why it failed. I was with a beautiful person who was beautiful inside and out. But there was a lot of anxiety and a lot of toxic energy within me that wouldn’t allow me to go deeper and connect with them.

For us to spend our lives together and I was desperate to figure out why I was failing at love. So, I took a super deep dive to explore love and figure out what I was doing wrong. And this book is what I learned. So, I’m not a, love guru. What I am is I’m a student at the front of the class, taking the most precise, simple notes and I’m sharing them with everybody else. And I’m still figuring myself out. I’m still learning, what is love.

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Additional Resources

How to Love Yourself and Heal The Body

November 14, 2022November 15, 2022

How To Be Loving And Live From The Heart

I wanted to be useful and connected and, loving, no matter what’s going on with me emotionally, no matter what’s going on with the other person, no matter what’s going on in the world. And that requires a higher vibration. Lots of mystics talk about love, being a state of consciousness. What that means is, love is not a feeling, love is higher vibration.

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Bio

Danielle LaPorte needs little introduction. Oprah Winfrey has said she “is uniquely connecting the world together with a spiritual energy that matters,” while Marianne Williamson has called her “a bright light in the modern priestess hood.’ As the founder of DanielleLaPorte.com, ranked by Forbes as one of the Top 100 Websites for Women and visited by millions of people each month, Danielle is one of the most critically acclaimed spiritual thought leaders of our time.

With her highly anticipated new book, How to Be Loving as Your Heart is Breaking Open and The World is Waking Up, releasing October 11 2022, Danielle has written the modern day manifesto on how to uncondition your mind from all kinds of social programming, tap into the intelligence of the heart, and elevate your life through the quality of your own thoughts.

Myrna: What is your journey from making love a priority in your life? How did that come about?

Danielle: For a long time, I was led by the question, how do I want to feel? And now the question is what do I want to embody? And the journey there was me realizing that even if I was having a bad day and wasn’t in a state of happiness, wasn’t feeling like the way I wanted to feel. I still felt connected to something higher and more meaningful. But really, the light bulb was when I realized that, I could still be useful to my friends, even if I was in the dark night of my soul. And then it occurred to me maybe this whole happiness thing, the end game, it’s important.

And I wanted to be useful and connected and loving, no matter what’s going on with me emotionally, no matter what’s going on with the other person, no matter what’s going on in the world. And that requires like a higher vibration. And you know, lots of mystics talk about love, of course, being a state of consciousness, but what that brings us to is, love is not a feeling, love is higher vibration.

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Power of Love: Intelligence of the heart

Myrna: Well, it’s very hard. They always say that that happiness is not an external thing. You know, it comes from inside and even if you have an, external locus of control, which is basically where your happiness depends on other people, circumstances or things. It’s only going to be temporary, because those things can’t continue for too long. Which is why they say that your happiness has to come from inside. And that means that whatever is going on outside, it’s not going to bother you. But it’s extremely, hard to do. You almost have to be like an enlightened being. That’s the, power of love and the intelligence of the heart.

Danielle: Everybody’s a little enlightened, the Zen Buddhist philosophy is everybody’s enlightened, we just have forgotten.

Myrna: Yes, we don’t operate in it because we forgotten. So, that was your journey into becoming, loving. You wanted to feel good all the time. You wanted to embody you. You learned, how to live from the heart, gratitude and, vibration. You talk about, vibration. Wayne Dyer talks about, vibration. Abraham Hicks talks about, vibration. What kind of work did you do to make sure your, vibration, is good?

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Loving yourself through the heartbreak

Danielle: It’s not so much that I want to feel good all the time. Who wants to suffer, I don’t want to suffer. Right? But it’s a place of even if you are suffering and you’re not feeling good, you’re in a state of acceptance with it. It’s like, okay, this is what’s happening. I’m gonna love myself through this. I created this. I’m not going to push it away. I’m going to bring it into my, heart. I’m going to have space for it. I’m going to be more gentle with it. I’m going to speak to myself more lovingly. But more specifically to your question about how to get there.

Well, I think it’s a lifelong journey, but certainly, big challenges questioning if, am I in the right career? Is this the faith that I should be holding? Suffering that leads us to meaningfulness and purpose. There are those challenging circumstances and then there’s just dedication. Like I want to know truth. I want to be love. No matter what, I’m committed.

My commitment, doesn’t mean it’s always easy, but I do the things that I know makes me more compassionate and more forgiving. And those things are ancient tools that have been around a long, long time. Contemplation, it’s a prayer practice. It’s, sifting through all the different practices and types of, meditation, until I found the kind of, meditation practice, that I actually wanted to do, that made me feel like energized and lit up.

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How to tap into heart intelligence

Myrna: I know that acceptance is very important. And it’s very important to accept your loved ones. Because a lot of times we get into relationships, and we want to change people and we don’t accept them. But yeah, talking about accepting suffering. That is deep.

How do we tap into, heart intelligence? One of the most powerful books that I’ve read is “The Alchemist.” The entire book is about listening to your, heart, and, how to live from the heart. I thought that we were supposed to listen to your gut. Your gut is what tells you when something is wrong, but listening to your, heart. This is a great because we are tapping to the, intelligence of the heart. It’s amazing.

Danielle: It’s important to make that distinction between the gut and, heart because gut is more instinct. The gut is gonna say run from danger. This is basic survival stuff. But we don’t want to be in that survival mode every day. We want to be in a state. So just like move it up. The, chakra system, moving on up your body move into the, heart. Everybody knows on a cellular, psychological level, what love is and what it feels like to be connected to soul, to be connected to others, to be giving and receiving loving kindness.

We just have to be still and we have to connect to the, heart, space, heart chakra, and higher consciousness. There’s no fear just presence. Don’t worry about tomorrow, don’t worry about the rent not right this moment. And you move into that gentleness that calms down your nervous system, both your, parasympathetic, and your, central nervous system. When your nervous system is calm you think more clearly. You’re not all panicked, or jacked up with anxiety and then you make more, loving choices. Loving choices, which all comes from quality of thought. You reference Dr. Wayne Dyer. Dr Dyer had a lot to say about the thoughts we think.

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Can everyone be loving?

Myrna: Right, that’s amazing. Now, I want to circle back to something you said that everybody knows what it’s like to give and receive love. Do you think that everybody knows that? Because there’s a lot of people that don’t love themselves and I believe that if you don’t love yourself you actually can’t give and receive love.

Danielle: Okay, there’s two things in there. I think in our depths, we do know love. And I think to get to the depths of love, we have to plumb those depths. You got to be still, you’ve got to get yourself in nature. You’ve got to ask those questions. It’s in there. The truth is in there. Is it buried? Absolutely. Do we doubt it? Yes, we have lots of so called evidence from how we’re raised in society that is not a loving place to be? Totally, but it’s the truth is eternal? It’s in there, you’re gonna find it.

You just got to look for what was that? Oh, loving other people and loving yourself? Yeah, I’ve thought about this very specifically for a while. Because you know, in this in our self-help space, there’s that theory of like, don’t fall in love with someone who doesn’t love themselves because they’re not gonna love you properly. I think it’s half-truth because we’re all one. We all come from the same source, and we’re all connected.

Then does it really matter if I’m loving myself first, but if I’m loving you first, and I’ve witnessed people who clearly had on a surface level, self-esteem issues, broken, not loving themselves, and I have seen them be, loving. Learn to love someone in their community. Learn to love the person who abandoned them. And it changed their whole way of living, obviously, with a lot of work, digging in and plumbing it out.

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Do you have heart intelligence?

Myrna: So how do we tap into the, intelligence of the heart? Is it through meditation or how do we do it?

Danielle: Yeah, It’s the practices. First you gotta want it. Want to sleep through the night? Do you want to be peaceful? Do you want to have more intimate conversations? Want to know your real power? Awesome, great. There are some things you can do. Find a, meditation, practice that works for you. Not one where you sit down on the, meditation cushion, and you hate being there and it’s grueling and you don’t feel lit up or expanded. That’s just like New Age punishment. Find a, prayer practice, that works for you.

Guided meditation heart center, is heart centering, prayer, and time for stillness. Our society is obsessed with being productive and it pulls us away from our wisdom. You need to be still to hear your, higher guidance. If you are always moving, you are going to get confusing information. So, stillness could be as simple as 15 minutes in the morning before anybody else in your house wakes up. Or it’s for those of us who have done, yoga, the last pose. It doesn’t matter how sweaty and bendy your, yoga, class was, the last pose is always, corpse pose. You just lie there in stillness. And people think, oh, this is my break. But actually that, corpse pose, the great, yoga, teachers tell you everything is moving towards that stillness.

So that you get to integrate all the work you did with your body and your mind. So, the end of the day, you ask yourself, what do you learn today? Who do you love? How did you get a little more time? What are you grateful for? That’s integrating lessons of the day. And then you don’t need to repeat the same lessons. Ideally, tomorrow you start fresh. Yeah. So, practices.

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Loving yourself through your meditation practice

Myrna: Well, my, meditation practice, is sitting and concentrating on the breath. Sometimes I do a, walking meditation, because I walk in the park and there’s a wooded area that I walk through. And when I’m in there, I’m talking to God and I am visualizing some of the things I want to manifest. What do you think about a, walking meditation?

Danielle: I have a very similar practice. It’s more of a working meditation. There’s lots of, prayer, in my life. There’s definitely, breathwork, for sure. I pray and meditate and it’s all mostly focused on being of service and healing. And I know that as I’m doing that, doing the work, getting closer to God and being more aware, I’m getting healed as well.

I use the light of the sun in, meditation, as well. The sun is very powerful. My belief this is, through some research into mysticism, because the soul is really the source. The sun is really the symbol, if not the embodiment, of the collective soul. And then in all the, meditations, that I’ve designed, I work with an energy healer that I’ve been with for many years, we co create all of these, meditation experiences, which is part of my offering. Almost every, meditation, begins with seeing this golden light, the sun. That is the symbol, the visual of your soul’s vastness. Your only job really, is to just bask in that light, you don’t have to reach for that light. You don’t even have to amplify that light.

The God source is always trying to find you, wants to get into every thought and every crevice, just bow down at your intention. I’m going to be aligned today. I’m going for this walk. And you step into it and you just receive the guidance.

Myrna; Beautiful, I’m in the self-improvement space and I know that, meditation, works for me, because one of the one of the byproducts of, meditation, is that you don’t get upset very often and you’re always in a calm space.

What is heart centered manifesting?

Danielle: Heart centered manifesting, you come up with a visual. You think it through every day. You see it, feel it, taste it, you really bring it to life. And you just keep watering it, anybody can manifest anything, there is a basic science of, manifesting. You don’t have to be enlightened. You don’t have to be a good person. You don’t have to have great intentions. If you want the car and you think about it enough. You will manifest the car.

I’m interested in is what I would call, heart centered manifesting, because I think ego centered manifesting has really gotten a lot of us into a lot of trouble. And it’s not very fulfilling ultimately. So, it’s like heart centered vision. comes from a place of knowing that your happiness matters to me that we all come from the same source. So, if I get the car, how is that going to be a benefit or harmful to others? So, what’s your vision got to do with everybody else? That’s a really basic great question to ask. How does your fulfillment lead to the fulfillment of others or does it take from others? My belief is that we have a, heart centered vision, and you can still want all the same things.

You can still want the car and the relationship and the money, whatever it is. When it’s on behalf of being of service, I think the soul is going to help lead you to more fulfillment. So, when you get the car, let’s just keep using that example. Maybe you’re doing some meals on wheels or maybe it’s just that you’re happier, more relaxed, and you’re better in your community. Maybe that car actually helps you be a more chill, loving mother, whatever it is, somehow your happiness is kind of spilling over.

Whereas if that was an ego goal to just get the car, going to get the car and you’re gonna want to the next thing, no lasting fulfillment. Soon you’re gonna want a better car. You’re gonna need the car and you’re gonna need the handbag. Then you need the likes on Instagram on and on. Heart centered manifesting, relax and it comes.

Book: How To Be Loving as your Heart is Breaking Open and the World is Waking up

Myrna: Well, that’s actually pretty good. Tell us about your book “How to be Loving as your heart is breaking open and the World is Waking Up” Why did you write it? What do you want readers to walk away with after reading? And how can you know listeners pick up a copy of it?

Danielle: This is what I want to have happen. I want to get gazillion emails for years of people telling me things like, I read you book how to be loving and forgive my mother or I speak more gently to myself, or I got over this heartbreak or I finally started asking my neighbor what they need. I just want to I want to hear those stories of how my book helped others become, loving.

I wrote it because it’s my first book in five years. I know lots of people are saying, Wow, this is so timely, did you know, the world was gonna fall apart? I did not know the world was gonna be in the state that it was in. It is on time, right?

Myrna: Yes. So, yeah. Now, part of the title is when your heart is breaking open, so and you said something a minute ago about, your heart is breaking but you’re still loving yourself. Is that part of it? Is it for people with a broken heart to love themselves?

Danielle: I think that’s in reference to we think we’re falling apart when we’re heartbroken, whether it’s the state of our community or an ending relationship or we get canned from a job; you’re not actually breaking, you’re expanding. All that heartbreak is showing you what you’re made of. It’s showing you where all the love, the real love is in your life, how capable you are. It’s a spiritual emergence.

My website is www.Daniellelaporte.com. I’m Danielle Laporte on Instagram. I’m there all the time. I have a membership, beautiful membership program called heart centered membership.

It’s like a spiritual support system. And we also have a program called the heart centered leadership program where we’ve got this really gorgeous curriculum of workshops, conversation starters, for coaches and HR directors and Unitarian, so it’s being used at really high levels of business. It’s being used in yoga studios.

Additional Resources

How to Love Yourself and Heal The Body

April 6, 2022August 26, 2022

Life After Death: How an Atheist Became a Believer

Is there, life after death,? One day Nancy Rynes was an, Atheist, not believing in God and after her NDE, she is bringing us, messages from Heaven. In this episode of the Transform Your Mind with coach Myrna, we are diving deep into the unknown world of, life after death, I am speaking today with Nancy Rynes. Nancy is the author of, Awakenings from the Light.. a book about her, near death experience, This episode will, transform your mind, on our spiritual bodies answer the question is there, life after death,?

Life After Death Introduction

While riding her bicycle, Nancy Rynes was struck by a large SUV. The vehicle’s driver who was completely absorbed in texting, plowed into Nancy, dragging both her and her bike down the street. The driver who was unaware that she had struck anyone, finally came to a stop when horrified onlookers ran into the road blocking the vehicle.
Suffering multiple broken bones, internal injuries, several severe spinal and head injuries, Rynes knew she was dying. At that moment, she underwent the first of two life-changing near-death experiences—her consciousness split between her frightened, injured self laying on the road, and an impartial, peaceful observer-consciousness who watched as first responders fought to keep her alive. Her second, more lengthy near-death experience came days later, during the surgery that attempted to repair her traumatized body.
• Nancy, a scientist and confirmed skeptic, was shown the wonders of Heaven, experiencing joy, love, peace and beauty on such a grand scale that she wept at its magnitude. She then met and spoke with a Being who gave her insights into life, love, and the wonders of Spirit. After her time in Heaven, and her brief, life after death, experience; Nancy was returned to her body to begin the long, slow process of recovering from injuries her surgeon affirms should have killed her.

• Nancy chronicles her experience in her book “Awakenings from the Light.” She has also authored “Messages from Heaven,” and contributed to the book “Awakened by Death.”

How an Atheist became a Believer.

Nancy let’s start off by asking you to share the events leading up to your, NDE, experience.

I was an, atheist, I was a scientist and I did a lot of science and technical writing up until the time of my, near death experience, I was at a place in my life, late 40s this was about five years ago. I was feeling as if something needed to change. I felt in a rut and I wanted to attribute that to maybe my job or maybe I needed to find a new place to live.

I wanted to change something external. That’s where I found myself that late fall early winter of 2013 heading into 2014 when the accident happened. I wasn’t really a believer in anything other than the physical reality around us. My scientific training taught me that I needed to find evidence, physical evidence. It’s tough to measure the spiritual realm from here, on this physical plane of existence.

I won’t go into too much of the accident itself because that in and of itself can take up a lot of time; but I was as you mentioned in the intro, I was riding my bicycle and was struck by a woman who was texting. I had what I call a dual consciousness experience. During the accident itself where I was able to kind of see the accident happening from outside of my body; but at the same time I was in my body.

Now in hindsight, I see that that was really what Deepak Chopra might have alluded to when he said consciousness is not located in the brain. My Higher Self or a higher state of my consciousness kind of pulled itself out of the physical body; but yet the physical body consciousness was still alive and well if you will inside my body and experiencing both.

Life After Death seeing the light

The accident caused a lot of a lot of bone breaks as you mentioned in the intro,
I had a lot of damage to my spine and in the hospital it was determined that I would need surgery to repair my spine in order to be able to walk because it was kind of touch-and-go there for a while. It turned out that a couple of shards of my back bone had broken off and one of my vertebrae and was just like within a millimeter or two of cutting my spinal cord, so it was pretty close to for me to be a paraplegic. That’s why we agreed to go into surgery that following Monday. It was during the surgery actually that I had my, life after death, experience.

The surgeons gave me the anesthesia and apparently what happened is I had some kind of a reaction to the anesthesia and my heart rate stopped, my blood pressure went to zero, and my breathing stopped for a while. I was clinically dead.

I woke up not laying in the operating room in the hospital, but I woke up standing up. I was vertical standing up on a hillside in this beautiful kind of meadow.
To my left and right were these monstrous trees and they had what I call just an energy scintillating throughout them. In the distance, kind of below me were rows and rows of mountains with a beautiful kind of bright silvery blue mist kind of light going through everything.

Unbelievable love welcomes you in the afterlife

Then I realized I wasn’t just seeing stuff, I was feeling things, I was feeling what I call love unbelievable Love coming in through me. It felt like I was being embraced by the heavens. Divine love and it was powerful! I also felt along with that Love, a Peace that was unimaginable. I had never felt that before. Peace on a scale that you and I can’t imagine as humans.

I was connected to everything. I began to wonder if I’d died on the operating table.
Then this voice said to me “You are home. This is your home.” As soon as those words came through me, I knew instantly that it was truth. This was my spiritual home. This is where we go in, life after death, This was my home and I didn’t want to leave ever. I wants to rest in this unconditional love on a scale that humans can’t really grasp. We can grasp it as a spiritual being but as a human being it’s hard for us to really wrap our brains around that kind of love.

I did not want to come back. I knew I had family and friends here but, I knew they would all be okay. But then a womanly figure came up to me and she said that she was my spiritual guide to this place and would teach me what I needed to know in order to come back to my life on earth. That’s when I said well, I don’t want to go back. I told her it’s going to be too hard, it’s going to be painful.

My big fear was oh my God what happens if I’m in a wheelchair. She said well, you’ve already agreed to go back. I said I don’t remember agreeing to go back. She then showed me a movie in the air in front of me. She showed me my spirit before I was born into this life and body. My spiritual self, standing or appearing to stand with my spiritual team and I was agreeing to do certain things when I came here into this life and body and one of them was to have this accident to revisit my home in a, life after death, accident and then go back and bring some insights back from what I learned. Once again the truth hit me like a ton of bricks. I remembered, I did agree. I agreed to have this, life after death, experience and accident.

Healing in the afterlife

I listened to a podcast a few weeks in which Anita Moorjani told of her, life after death, experience. She was dying with stage 4 cancer and tumors all over her body. On the operating table she had her, life after death, experience and made the decision to come back into her body. When she came back out of that, life after death, experience in a couple of months all the tumors had shrunk and she is now alive and thriving cancer free!

In 2006, Anita Moorjani fell into a coma as my 4-year struggle with cancer was coming to an end. While doctors rushed to attend to my frail body, I entered into a near-death experience (NDE) where I discovered one of life’s greatest truths: Heaven is not a destination; it’s a state of READ ABOUT MY NDE being. When I regained consciousness, my cancer miraculously healed and I was free of disease within weeks! Since then, I’ve heeded the call to share this powerful story—and divine lesson—with the world.

I’ve talked to chaplains and ministers about this and they see this a lot with patients who had, near-death experiences, or, life after death, where they had some kind of incredible recovery. I call it being touched by heaven. My spiritual guide taught me a whole bunch of stuff which I put in my book “Awakenings in the Light”

Before she sent me back, she did what I call a healing of my energy or spiritual Body. I could feel this energy coming into me when she was doing this. She placed her hand over my throat area, my upper collarbone area, then over my left shoulder and then along my rib cage because I’d broken a ton of ribs. I think it was five or six ribs that were broken and then I had a punctured lung on that same side, so she put her hand over all of that and kind of did some energy work on me and then she sent me back. When I came back from my, near death experience, I healed so fast, the doctor freaked out.

Conclusion
I learned from my spiritual guide and my, life after death, experience is that she’s with me all the time and there is no separation between where you are in the physical and where we are in the spiritual. It’s just a different energy state and that everybody in the spiritual realm is around us all the time. I can when I do specific meditation techniques to communicate with her more consciously but she also guides me. I mean I know she has a hand in things that happen in my life because there are some things that happen in my life well it may be you know the bigger divine consciousness that we call God, but certainly someone or some being or some set of beings at that level has helped me out quite a bit.

I volunteered to bring this message, but I’m not by any means the only person just one of a team. Someone else’s may reach a different audience.

If you sign up for my newsletter on my website nancyrynes.com you get a free preview copy of my book “Awakenings from the light”

Remember to subscribe to this podcast in iTunes, Google play, TuneIn radio, Spotify, iHeart radio, or any of your favorite podcast players. I would love to hear your feedback on this episode, so please leave a review.

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Additional Resources:
https://www.amazon.com/Life-After-Death-Burden-Proof/dp/0307345785
https://www.allaboutspirituality.org/life-after-death.htm
https://blog.myhelps.us/principle-2-the-events-in-your-life-whether-good-or-bad-work-together-for-good/
https://blog.myhelps.us/9-love-out-of-the-snares/
https://blog.myhelps.us/how-to-use-the-winds-from-the-storm-to-elevate-your-llife/

March 14, 2022March 14, 2022

Relationship Reset: Spiritual Healing For Couples

Spiritual healing, for couples helps them to unblock their, chakras, by moving the energy away. And once they move the energy away, they’re lighter, and then they can go on to have, healthy relationships.

My guest today is Brianna Colette, Brianna is an, intuitive, relationship healer and, soulmate medium, who helps guide her clients to connect with their inner self in order to focus more on a higher sense of, self love, as a means to grow stronger connections and relationships. Thus ultimately leading them to finding and experiencing the most preeminent of bonds: soulmate love.

Download the Podcast here

https://pdcn.co/e/https://chrt.fm/track/897G7/www.buzzsprout.com/1761155/10249128-relationship-reset-spiritual-healing-for-couples.mp3?download=true

Bio

Brianna is an, intuitive, relationship healer and, soulmate medium, who helps guide her clients connect with their inner self in order to focus more on a higher sense of, self love, as a means to grow stronger connections and relationships. Thus ultimately leading them to finding and experiencing the most preeminent of bonds: soulmate love. She is NLP Certified, a Karuna Reiki Master, and a certified Sound Healer Practitioner who really has a way of connecting with people.
Examining her clients’ old belief systems allows Brianna to focus on any client’s possible wounds from childhood, inherited family dynamics, or fear surrounding vulnerability. Once Brianna examines their past, she helps her clients make peace with old wounds and break free from any self-sabotaging toxic patterns, guiding them on how to release fear and create the right conditions for a higher frequency of love.

Myrna: What was your journey to becoming an, intuitive, relationship healer?

Brianna: Thank you for that beautiful introduction, by the way, like, of course I live in this work every day and to hear someone else put it so beautifully and poetically into such a fabulous intro was like, very humbling. I’m like, yeah. So thank you, that was great. Well, as you can imagine, um, you know, I was not always in this work, like most people, like most of my clients, I wasn’t given this template.

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Becoming a Reiki Master

I wasn’t given this handbook for having a really healthy, dynamic relationship, I had to go through the bumps and the bruises and the mistakes, and really try to heal myself. I have a really interesting story, as most people do, who kind of step into the, healing intuitive, work. I witnessed a really violent murder. It was a murder of a family member. They were my next door neighbors. And I say I was there at the right place at the right time, because I was able to save some people’s lives that night.

It was one of those things that you can’t prepare for to become a, spiritual healer. It’s one of those things that is a life altering event and changes who you are as a person. As you can imagine, after witnessing something like that, I struggled with, PTSD. I struggled with, depression, and, suicidal thoughts. That experience really tested all of my, coping mechanisms.

Taking a vacation to try to relieve stress or even, going out with girlfriends for some dinner and drinks. Those types of things no longer worked for me anymore. And so as I felt my, mental health, starting to degrade, I started to feel like I was slipping. It is the best way I can kind of describe your, mental health, when you don’t know that it’s happening.

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Western therapy did not heal

I did a lot of traditional Western versions of therapy which is what led me into all these different modalities that I now am certified in and offer to other people. I immediately felt the shift within, I started to not only have a logical understanding of why things were happening, or how things from my past were affecting me, presently, I started to really embody that change, and I started to feel better my, spiritual healing, had started.

And so through that process of, spiritual healing, as you can imagine, the things that used to hold an attraction for me, my old business, my old life held no interest. I felt a calling into, spiritual healing, and, intuitive, work. I surrendered into it and have been guided and led to help others to heal themselves and to really get to a place of, inner peace, and contentment and connection within, relationships.

Myrna: That’s awesome. I guess that takes me down the path of the, Karuna Reiki master. How did you stumble onto that? You said you went to Western therapies. Did you actually have a, reiki, session and loved it or are you just graduated towards that?

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Using Reiki to Heal childhood wounds

Brianna: I was at rock bottom, I was grasping at anything. If someone suggested it, I was like, sure, I’ll try acupuncture. Sure, I’ll try EMDR, I was really willing and open to anything on that journey, and I knew somebody who practiced, Reiki, and I had sessions with her. And of course, it was a different kind of, spiritual healing, that I had experienced. I mean, I’ve been going to traditional talk therapy since I was nine years old.

I was looking for something a little bit different and I had a lot of my, trauma, and a lot of the things that I’ve been holding on to for a really long time. Reiki, really helped me to break through. And so of course, I was like, I, when I healed myself, it was a good place, I have to learn how to do this.

What exactly is, Reiki?

Myrna: Reiki, is a Japanese holistic practice of connecting your, chakras, and using energy work. It’s energy healing, And a lot of people who are familiar with depression, would say depression hurts. There’s obviously a physical manifestation in the body of when our emotions cause us pain. We’ve all felt anxiety, those knots in our stomach, or fear in our chest where we can’t breathe, so there’s a physical, physiological response to emotional pain.

What, Reiki, does is a way of connecting into the emotional connection within the body, each of our, chakra, and throughout our entire physical body hold onto memories, they hold on to experiences, we hold it in our bodies. And so, Reiki, helps us to get rid kind of these emotions that are painful, and helps us to release them. The physical reality of having, Reiki, done on you is you really feel lighter afterwards, emotions not weighing on you so heavy.

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Chakra meditation

Myrna: I do, chakra meditation, myself so I’m very aware of, chakras. But one of the things that most stands out to me when I learn about the, chakra system, is that they’re seeing that if you’ve got a blockage in your, chakra, that’s where disease starts. So when you do the, Reiki healing, do you move the blocked energy? Or are you just dealing with emotions?

Brianna: They’re all connected. Okay. And if you think about it, right, from a scientific standpoint, we’re cells that are vibrating, right? We’re all just energy bouncing around. And when we, feel at peace, you kind of feel really grounded and in alignment. When you feel stressed or worried about something you kind of feel off, right? You feel off balance, you don’t feel like you’re the highest version of yourself.

When we have energetic blockages energy is stuck in the, chakras, which are our energy computer. Energy stuck in your, root chakra, usually deals shows up as fear, or it can it show up in your solar plexus, as creativity. So each, chakra, has different pinpoints or different foundational bases.

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Using Reiki to clear the chakra system

When we do have a blockage and one of those, chakras, it usually is related to something on an emotional level, because we are emotional, human beings that have that need for connection. And so usually, yes, you can relate back a blockage to an emotional issue that’s happening in your life.

Myrna: So blocked energy starts as emotional, and then disease follows. All right. So I understand. I had a few interviews on the show about, Reiki, and of course, almost all my guests talked about the, chakras. So you have migrated your specialty to, you call it a, soulmate medium, which is what I love. But also what you’re doing is you’re helping people heal from their childhood wounds that are actually physically manifesting in their bodies.

Brianna: For me, personally, I was really searching all the time for love. And I was really putting myself in, unhealthy relationships, when the murder happened. A few weeks later I was dumped by my then boyfriend, I was having a really hard go of it. completion, I was searching for solace, or love and happiness everywhere else outside of myself as well as, spiritual healing. And through that process of, spiritual healing, I started to realize what it is that I need to look at within myself.

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Spiritual Healing for Couples

I was able to heal myself and transmute the, trauma, and step into this place of like, oh, so this is what it takes to get here. This is what I needed to heal to be able to experience this. And I just felt really passionate that Like, I wish that someone had explained this to me, or shown me how to heal this because I spent so much, so many broken hearts, so much energy, so much time trying to figure it out. And so that’s what really called me into this kind of work.

Myrna: Alright, so that explains why you became a, soulmate medium. But what I was talking about is still connecting the, chakras, to past wounds. I loved your statement,

We are healed from the scars and not the wounds.

So you help them to unblock their, chakras, by moving the energy away. And once they move the energy away, they’re lighter, and then they can go on to have, healthy relationships.

Healing Childhood wounds

Brianna: It’s like we kind of, we have the ability to create whatever it is that we want in life. But unfortunately, a lot of our blocks are limitations that we perceive. And for me, my, my work is about asking what are the templates that you received in childhood? What was normalized for you in relationships? Did you grow up in a household where yelling at each other was something that was just normal, right? Or did you grow up in a household where being emotionally distant was something that was just you know, status quo?

Did you grow up in a home as a child, where you took on the responsibility of worrying about everybody else, except for yourself? Because there was chaos, you know, so these types of foundational experiences when we’re young shape our belief systems, about the kind of relationships that we’re having into adulthood. And for me, and in my personal experience, and experience with so many clients, when we can heal and unlock the things that are maybe not so healthy, or are limiting us and our belief systems or behaviors, we can unlock and heal and really learn?

Oh, this is actually the better way to show up. Oh, this is actually what’s healthier for me. These are the types of partners that actually give me what I’m looking for versus recreating the same like, you know, what is the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again. This is how we change the dynamics of our life in our, relationship.

What is a soulmate medium

Alright, so now this is my question that I wanted to ask, soulmate medium? Also what is the definition of a, soulmate?

Brianna: A lot of people don’t even aren’t familiar with what the term, medium means. Oftentimes, what people perceive when they hear the word, medium, they think, psychic. That is not completely different psychics and, mediums, are not the same thing. A medium is somebody who is a channel, I have the ability and have learned how to channel, intuition.

We all have that kind of like inner knowingness that’s called clear sentient, where you can feel things . And that’s what, intuition, is. So obviously a, medium, can feel things and experience things on various levels, whether you can like hear the you can hear you can receive messages. For me personally, the way that I work with clients when I say, soulmate medium, is I can help to intuitively connect into what they are feeling.

I can help people to see the blind spots. Sometimes we insulate ourselves from the truth. Sometimes we might be in denial about things. Sometimes there’s a cognitive, right, we’ve isolated ourselves because it’s too painful to deal with the brain is really intelligent that way, it compartmentalizes things and we can’t even see ourselves clearly.

So what I say is in terms of a, soulmate medium, I can intuitively tap into what is really going on underneath the surface that we need to heal. We need to connect into to elevate and upgrade out of so that you can experience this higher frequency this higher soulmate energy of love. And I do a lot of work explaining to people what even a, soulmate, is. But ultimately, being able to connect into getting people out of behaviors that are there, they’re settling, or they are caught in patterns of dysfunction, which is the antithesis of what a, soulmate, is.

Spiritual healing from past trauma

All right. So I’m listening very intently. So what I got out of that is that someone comes to you broken because of past trauma, past relationships, you’re able to intuitively help them to see there to see what the dysfunction is. And then once they are operating, that’s the full throttle for a different word, then you they will be able to attract their, soulmate. Is that correct?

Brianna: Oftentimes with clients, I see a lot of my unhealed broken parts are attracted to your unhealed broken parts, you know, and that’s where we get a lot of compounding happening, right? We attract what we are. And so I help clients to leave behind that old version of where they’re playing small, where we’re accepting less than we deserve, where we are making excuses for other people’s bad behavior or, unhealthy relationship, dynamics.

Let’s upgrade out of that. Let’s start operating in this place of like, integrity with how you treat yourself self respect, self love, because everything comes from from within us, right? So if you’re, if you’re able to feel really aligned with yourself, know you what you deserve, know what you should be receiving, you’re going to attract someone who’s also done that kind of work.

Finding your soulmate

Your, soulmate, will be operating at the same frequency because you’re like, oh, yeah, I want to be able to trust somebody to and I’ve worked through my own, trauma, I’m not going to put up with someone else’s raggedy BS, you know, like, you want a partner that meets you at where you’re at. And so if we can leave behind those old behaviors and belief systems, then we will attract our, soulmate.

I work with anybody who is desiring to fix whatever kind of, relationship, they’re in, whether that’s heteronormative, whether that’s, homosexual, like anything under the sun, if you have a desire to fix, and heal and upgrade the way that you’re showing up in your, relationships. You’re my kind of person. I oftentimes and one of the things I’m really good at is helping single people who are or people out of divorce or out of a relationship who are having a hard time letting go. I help couples to heal, spiritual healing.

Relationship reset

That’s what, relationship reset, is the, spiritual healing, program that I am working with right now. It’s designed for people in relationships who are committed they know that this is a person that they want to have a future with and and work things out; but are feeling maybe there’s blocks in their communication.

There’s things that are kind of bubbling to the surface after kind of the honeymoon phase wears off, where you’re mirroring some unhealthy dynamics back and forth to each other and just get to a place of being able to show up. Within in that relationship feeling really supported and aligned and really clear about what your future feels like together, they need, spiritual healing.

Myrna: Let’s talk about, relationship reset, spiritual healing, for couples to find how they are showing up, what their blockages are? You know you people say they’re great baggage from relationships. Tell us about your coaching program, how can listeners connect with you and sign up for your coaching program?

Conclusion

Absolutely. So, the, relationship reset, right now is a group coaching program, where I am taking people through these foundations of, you know, these really important baseline. I believe, characteristics of what is involved in a healthy dynamic and a healthy relationship like decide whether that’s intimacy, whether that’s trust, whether that’s healthy communication, and helping each of them pull back the layers to see where maybe that they’ve got some stuff from the path that is preventing them from having really effective communication or, you know, feeling safe to really open up the path of intimacy.

It’s a retreat program where I will go over the the fundamentals the foundations and then there’s also one on one time with me to be able to go a little bit deeper for, spiritual healing.

So to go check out and learn all about my different offerings, whether it’s, relationship reset, whether it’s my other programs that are downloadable you go to my www.Briannacolette.com that has all the information on all the ways you can connect with me. My Instagram handle is @briannacollect. I welcome any anybody who’s looking for more information or feels like this resonates happy to jump on a call.

Additional Resources

Understanding How to Use Reiki Energy for Mind and Body

February 23, 2022February 24, 2022

How to Get and How to Keep a Man

Stephanie Stanford, Love Empowerment Coach tell us the secrets to get and, how to keep a man.

Stephanie teaches audiences how to reach inside and access the power that’s always been there through the power of LOVE!
She’s worn tiara’s on stage, thrown candy in the crowd and performed lip sync of “All About That Base” to keep the crowds laughing while they learn. Her down to earth tips make it easy for anyone to master the mysteries of love and bring out the peace, passion and princess-power of every woman.

In her interview on How to Get and, How to Keep a Man, Stephanie says that, Self Love, shuts down Self doubt so you can take action!

Relationship Love doesn’t have to be so hard. Life Love keeps you balanced, peaceful and calm in a crazy world.

“When your life is filled with love, then you are free to pursue your purpose” You can experience Self Love, Relationship Love and Life love!

Love is life a Boomerang, it always comes back, so give it freely. It is like seeds that blow in the wind. It does not always come back from the people we choose to love; but it always comes back. Check out my Chapter on Love in my book “Out of the Snares, a story of hope and encouragement”

Stephanie tells us that men have needs and some of those needs are to be the man, to be appreciated, to feel important.
It is not only important to know how To Get a man but also, how to keep a man, once you get him. Women need to know how to let a man know they are interested and then step back and let the man lead.
To Get and Keep a Man, women needs, self love. If you have no love for self you can’t give love. It is also the #1 thing women can do to improve their relationships.

Here are some ways on, how to keep a man

Trust him with all your heart. If you want to, keep a man, don’t treat him like just another guy who is unworthy of your trust. …
Love yourself. …
Have faith in him. …
Make him feel handsome. …
Make him feel he’s the only one. …
Don’t make him feel jealous. …
Let him know and understand you. …
Be humble.
Love yourself.

Google Podcast Transform Your Mind

Learn to love yourself first

You cannot give away what you don’t have so, self love, is important.

Cliché? Sure. But if you don’t do it, you can’t expect anyone else to.

We all have a need to love and be loved. Developing our capacity to love ourselves serves as a training ground for loving other people.

If you can’t love yourself, you don’t believe that you are worthy of others’ love. And if you don’t believe you’re worthy of others’ love, you’ll struggle to build a healthy, long-term relationship.

Are you perhaps now thinking that you’re still just dating, and it’s way too soon to be thinking about love?

This isn’t about being in love, it’s about laying the foundations for love a little further down the line.

It’s about making sure that you’re lovable and demonstrating to your guy that you’re worthy of his continuing interest.

Think back to your very first forays into the world of relationships as a teen. Maybe you were nervous and unsure of yourself. You were probably still figuring out your identity and your place in the world.

While some lucky people manage to successfully forge a long-lasting relationship in their early years, most of us just haven’t learned to love ourselves enough at that young age to be able to do it.

iHeart Radio

How to keep a man, Be Humble and Nice!

Being nice sounds like a no-brainer, right? But spend too much time trying to be nice and you risk being the opposite.

In those early days where you’re spending a lot of emotional energy getting to know someone, you can end up feeling a bit wrung out and all over the place.

You feel like you’re constantly thinking about how to react and what impression you’re giving.

You’re trying to be nice and make a good impression, but you end up putting him off because you’re overthinking everything and it shows (if you think it doesn’t, you’re wrong).

Stop doing this. By trying to be nice all the time, you’re not being yourself. No-one is constantly nice and undemanding.

Sometimes, everyone is a bit ratty after a hard day of work, or a bit upset about a family argument, or whatever. It’s OK to not be totally OK all of the time.

How to Keep a man, Make him feel Handsome

This is the perfect stage for being super-seductive. At this point, your sex life should be getting pretty hot.

You’re past any initial awkwardness, you’re getting to know each other but there’s still a hell of a lot for you to explore. This is a great time to make the most of your lust.

Remember that flirting isn’t just something you do in the first couple of dates. If you want your relationship to work out long-term, keep on flirting.

Remember that all the flirting you did in those heady early dates isn’t going to be enough to carry you through forever.

Flirting in a relationship, makes him feel handsome. Isn’t quite the same as flirting in order to try and get someone’s attention. It is letting him know that you only have eyes for him. That makes him feel good.

These tips show you to not only, how to keep a man, but how to thrive in your relationship

Subscribe to the Transform Your Mind podcast on iTunes

February 16, 2022February 24, 2022

3 Ways to Find Happiness After a Divorce

Happiness! The Universal goal of everyone who has breathe. So how can you find happiness after a divorce?

Coach Dan Willms talks about how your behavior affects your happiness. I agree; but here are my thoughts.

What is happiness?

Let’s start with what it is not.

It is not how much money you have.
It is not how big your house is.
It is not what kind of car you drive.
It is not found in any external thing!

Here are 3 ways to find, happiness, after a divorce:

1. Your relationship with yourself.
2. Your relationship with those closest to you.
3. And your relationship with God.

Let’s look at each of these
As you can see, relationship is key.

We are social beings, we need connection, even it is one person.
That is why people commit suicide at Christmas, because while everyone is celebrating with family and friends they are alone.
It is also the reason that social media is so powerful, it allows connection to others.

Out of the Snares of rape

I will share a story.
This woman from Toronto sent me a friend request on Facebook. She was the friend of one of my friends. I accepted. Then she started reaching out to me about coaching and about my book “Out of the Snares, a story of hope and encouragement” .

I found out her story.
Raped twice when she was a teenager, sent to live with her father in another country who abandoned her, got pregnant and gave her child up for adoption. She was living in a studio apartment alone. Facebook was her lifeline. You don’t know who is on the other end of that friend request!
So if you are lonely, connect!

These are a different training and a different mindset to come from a perspective of abundance instead of lack and limitation, and that’s really where my internal work has been. Each time I shift up belief, a thought, a perspective from lack and limitation to one of abundance, my life just expands and explodes.

You know what society says is this is accomplished, then you’ll feel successful and a lot of people get there, and they feel empty, they feel like that it doesn’t have much meaning in their lives or they’re not feeling satisfied or fulfilled. The truth is that as long as we’re chasing things outside of ourselves we’re always projecting our happiness or our fulfillment outside of ourselves. Fulfillment is never outside of ourselves, it’s within ourselves and it’s in the present moment. where all of our power exists.

1. Let’s look First at your relationship with yourself.

The first secret to finding happiness, You have to love yourself.
If you can’t love yourself, no one else can love you. If you can’t love yourself, you can never be happy!

You can start by finding one thing about you, that you love.
Come on, God knew what he was doing when he created you. Everyone has at least one thing that makes them stand out.
One of my daughter’s friend’s laments about the fact that she has no breasts and no curves. She can’t find a boyfriend. Why? Because she projects that and that is what the men see. Not loving herself shows up in other ways in a relationship.

Now look at some women who do not fit the cultural norm of beauty and weight. I can guaranty you that in every situation if she loves herself, she will be in a healthy relationship.
Plus, if there is something you can change about something you don’t like about yourself, do it.
If you can’t change it, find a different perspective on it and learn to love it.

2. Your relationship with those closest to you

A mother, a father, a sister, a brother, a best friend, a spouse are top on the list of level 5 intimate, relationships. A level 5, relationship, is a relationship with someone who knows your intimate secrets. Someone who you share everything with and they with you. If you have someone like this in your life. You are blessed indeed.
Now you may be wondering why I did not add children to that list. Children gives us profound happiness especially when they are young. But you can’t share secrets with your children so they don’t provide the intimacy we look for to be happy.
To be happy find a level 5 friend and cry on their shoulders!

3. Your relationship with God.

The beauty of having a relationship with God is that it alone can make you happy. If you have a relationship with God, you will love yourself, you will be happy alone because you feel God’s presence with you always, your relationships will be healthy because you will love unconditionally because that is what God teaches us to do. You will find opportunities to bless others and that will make you happy.
A relationship with God is not just going to church, it is not just knowing scripture, it is not just about tithing. The relationship I am talking about is being in direct communication with God.
Going to God with your issues and struggles and seeing him make a way out of no way. Seeing him turn the weapons formed against you into blessings. Being able to receive guidance from the Holy Spirit every day. When you walk in that space everything else in your life falls into place.

You will not only find happiness again, but you will find bliss!

Listen to the full episode on YouTube
_blank”>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9vxDGuSyiHQ

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December 20, 2021December 20, 2021

How to Love Yourself and Heal The Body

I was sitting around telling myself I’m sick all the time. I’m concentrating on the pain so I started practicing, self love. I started loving the parts of my body that didn’t hurt , like my hands. I start really paying attention to my thoughts, how I’m speaking to myself, and within three weeks the pain was gone. It is important to, love yourself.

Jenny Mannion has spent the last fifteen-years helping hundreds of clients re-awaken their energy & passion, rediscover their self-worth, and transform to the person they were meant to be. After suffering with several debilitating chronic diseases for over seven years, Jenny healed herself in three weeks using techniques she developed, which are the same techniques she uses today to help others heal.

Download the Podcast Here:

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Jenny helps her clients overcome fear, stress, lack of self-worth, anxiety, and traumatic memories or events with simple to use mindfulness & meditation practices, positive affirmations, revolutionary wellness practices, and community support of likeminded individuals.

Love yourself for healing

Jenny: I was sitting around telling myself I’m sick all the time. I’m concentrating on the pain so I started practicing, self love. I started loving the parts of my body that didn’t hurt , like my hands. I start really paying attention to my thoughts, how I’m speaking to myself, and within three weeks the pain was gone. It is important to, love yourself.

Myrna: What was your chronic illness was?

Jenny: My first diagnosis was chronic mono. Mononucleosis sometimes leads to a serious condition called chronic EBV infection. In chronic EBV infection, you have long-lasting symptoms and a viral infection that lasts longer than usual after your original mononucleosis diagnosis.

Then they found the Epstein Barr Virus in my blood, then it was fibromyalgia. Then it was a genetic blood disorder, which made me more prone to blood clots. I manifested a blood clot within three weeks of them telling of this diagnosis and ended up in the hospital for a week. And the last was Ehlers Danlos, which was the most serious because that was what that made them say I’d wind up in a wheelchair.

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Myrna: So you had four things going on with you. Wow.

Jenny: Four things and you keep going I got to keep getting diagnoses.

Myrna: And I know that, Fibromyalgia, which is the only one I recognize from that is very painful, isn’t it?

Healing Fibromyalgia with self love

Jenny: Fibromyalgia, was very painful and it was focused on my leg. It feels like you have the flu, you are just really out of it. You don’t know what you’ll be able to do that day; If you can get out of bed. There were times when I was crawling downstairs wondering if it was safe for me to drive my kids. You have got to, love yourself, to push past the discomfort and start healing my body.

It was disempowering. I joined support groups, but those were a little disempowering, too because it wasn’t about how will we cope with this illness? It became like almost a one upping, everyone sharing their sad stories, my husband left me because I’m sick. Well, you know, it wasn’t inspiring at all.

So, in really focusing on my mind, and my limiting thoughts about, self love, I fostered my Mind, Body, and Spirit connection. Deepak Chopra is so great at teaching about that. Wayne Dyer with intention, really focusing on my mind, because we’re on automatic pilots so much of the time. When I started to focus on, self love, I was appalled at the things I was saying to myself.

Myrna: So what exactly did you do?

Attention Shifting for deep healing

Jenny: I started with some forgiveness work. Then I went to the, attention shifting, really paying attention to my fingers that didn’t hurt, because my legs were in pain and a lot of my other body parts were in pain so I started focusing my energy on the body parts that were healthy. Then gratitude work and, self love. Grateful for my comfy bed. I would be in gratitude that I could read to my kids even if I couldn’t run.

Myrna: You love Deepak Chopra, one of the things I learned from him was this affirmation:

“Every day in every way, I’m getting better and better. My Biostat is set at a healthy 45 years of age. I look and feel 45 years old.” And then you go through about 10 things that you’re getting better and better at you know: So I understand you saying every day that you are getting better and better!

Jenny: Yeah, I’m saying yeah, every day I’m working on my healing every day. I’m getting a little better every day. Yeah, I mean, giving myself that credit to for the work that I am doing, you know I am watching videos, I am listening, I am focusing my attention. Just really be mindful and conscious of the way I was talking to myself and where I was putting my energy.

I mean, we know this all boils down to, energy, our thoughts and emotions, creates our, energy. So, that was one of the big lesson I took away from the secret, that one line! Every 11 months were 99.9% new so where are we putting our intention?

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The body regenerates every 11 months

Myrna: True every 11 months, you’re a new person. But yeah, so that’s actually pretty good, because if you’re seeing your healing, what you’re seeing is your body is regenerating itself. So, you concentrate on, mindfulness, you concentrate on, gratitude and you practice, self love. You concentrate on your mantras and forgiving yourself. And you said in three weeks, you were you were out of pain, right? So what do you attribute that to? Do you attribute that to to the fact that you are no longer concentrating on the pain?

Jenny: I changed my, energy. The, energy, flowing through me was creating healthier cells. When I was focusing on my legs and how my legs were in pain, wondering if I could walk today; I really wasn’t giving my body an opportunity to create those healthy cells. I was expecting pain and that is what I got.

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Using the chakras energy to heal

Myrna: Yeah, one of the things that I learned from that is that when your, chakras, are blocked that’s when disease come through. So when you talk about changing the, energy, and changing the flow I understand.

Jenny: Absolutely, once I started reading about, chakras, (Caroline Myss) was a huge influence) they resonated so deeply.

Myrna: Let’s talk about how to , love yourself. You talked about, self-love, in your Bio. What are some of the, self-love affirmations, and, self-worth, practices that you teach your clients to declare and own their value?

Jenny: Well, it’s so important first of all, to have, self-love, and self-worth. Because if we are thinking we’re not worthy and we don’t love ourselves, we attract the relationships that reflect that, we attract negative situations. We’re vibrating at that energy to attract those unhealthy relationships over and over. It can be like Groundhog Day, different person, same relationship, you know, so it is really important to, love yourself, and have, self worth.

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Forgiveness is a form of self love

Jenny: And I do think, forgiveness, is a great one. At the, soul, level we know we should love ourselves unconditionally. Unfortunately, there’s a long distance between the, soul, and the, mind. When we’re just in our groove, that negative self talk is limited.

The limited way we see ourselves maybe from a relationship we had or from our parents or from a job. There’s so many different ways that we can get those messages and we tend to hang on to the negative messages we’ve received, a lot tighter than the positive ones. So it really is about reclaiming that, self love.

I love the morning and night, because that is when our, subconscious mind, is tuned in. I love the shower in the morning to practice, mindfulness. We are never mindful in the shower. We’re never really there. And it’s such a powerful time, we’re receiving the water element, and we are usually were left alone in the shower.

Practicing mindfulness in the shower

Myrna: So, what exercises can you do in the shower that you can bring in gratitude and, mindfulness?

Jenny: There are so many different things that we can do that make that our, self love meditation, time worth it. Most people do shower in the morning. I also love the idea of holding our hands over our hearts and taking some deep breaths and bringing in one of our favorite moments. We have we’re so programmed to replay the worst moments so this is a time to consciously bring in the good times.

Bring in the memory i.e of a loved one cuddling with a pet, maybe the memory of a beautiful vacation that you went on, bring in all the senses, affirm to the world that everything’s okay. Because a lot of times we are affirming that things aren’t okay.

So, really choosing to be mindful, choosing to listen to the stories you’re telling yourself. Do you do something and then say, Oh, I’m so stupid. Well, you know, correct that, catch yourself and say that you’re not stupid.

Meditation and self love is the best form of healing

Myrna: I like that. I like that. I like the shower idea too. I do, energy, work. So I meditate, I also walk in the park every morning and, when I’m going to bed I’m also you know doing, energy work. So I’m in the space, but I never actually heard anybody talk about practicing, mindfulness, in the shower. I know that a lot of people are not, conscious, in the shower, and I’m one of them. It’s just one of those things where you’re never actually there. So practicing to be mindful in the shower is profound.

Now, one of the things you talk about is how we can access our body’s inner diagnostic system for, deep healing. How we can tap into our body inner diagnostic system, so that we can heal ourselves?

Chakras and healing energy

Jenny: I consider the, chakras, our inner diagnostic system. Connecting to those different, chakras, really can heal us. I also think it’s so important to pay gratitude for our body. We have this complex system, going on all the time, we just expect them to work and usually we don’t pay attention to them until they start giving us some trouble.

Myrna: Can you explain what, chakras, are?

Jenny: The, chakras, are energetic wheels of, energy, that are in our body? We have seven major ones. We have hundreds in our body, but we have seven major ones. And they’re the colors of the rainbow, they run from the bottom of our lower back to our top of our head and each, chakra, holds a different, energy.

Give you an example the, Root Chakra, at the base of our spine. That’s really about the messages we got from our parents from when we came into this world and it makes sense that that includes like our safety. Do we feel safe on this planet walking on this planet, it affects our legs and affects our feet. So as we go as we inform ourselves about each, chakra, we really can it kind of makes sense.

Using the heart chakra for self love

Jenny: The, heart chakra, is at the heart and it is about our relationships or, self love. Are we open to receiving love for ourselves? And it makes sense that our chest and our lungs and our heart can be affected by the balance.

So really, when we know the part of us that’s not feeling well, we can go to that, chakra, and find out, what is out of balance. If you’re having like, something is hard to digest, your, solar plexus chakra role, will start acting up, which is your third, chakra. Each of the, chakras, has its own emotional and physical component and it’s so powerful to learn about them. You can download a free chart online to find out which, chakra, controls what.

Myrna: It’s really, powerful to learn because our body is always speaking to us. And those little pains aren’t to punish us. They are to tell us that something’s out of balance. And if we catch it early, we can prevent things from getting really bad. I love that you’ve talked to your body, you know we can tell our body what we would like it to do for us.

Jenny: Our, energy, goes through the pain and focusing on the pain or taking away the pain on a superficial level like popping a pill doesn’t allow, deep healing. You’re not looking at why do I have this headache? Did something stress me out today? When you really, love yourself, you investigate.

Using the Chakras to investigate pain

Pain represents blocked energy. A lot of women that I’ve coached have issues with their, throat chakra. So, if you have issues with your throat or your voice, ask yourself, am I speaking my truth? Does it feel safe for you to speak your truth? Are you living authentically?

Myrna: That’s pretty good. Yeah, I know about the, chakras, and I do a lot of Chakra meditation to clear my, chakras but, I never thought of them as my, inner diagnostic, system.

I just concentrated on the fact that if you have disease in your body, that means your, chakras, are blocked. Right, and you clear it, but going backwards to say, Well, yeah, you know, if you’re having problems with your legs or something or you’re having, you know, stomach issues. It could be because of something that came in the, energy, that got stuck there.

That’s best, inner diagnosis. And then obviously, once you’ve diagnosed it, then you could not only heal yourself, but you can also heal your mind.

Jenny: Right, yeah, absolutely. I mean, our mind is so with energetic healing, we know that things can disappear in an instant. But if our mind doesn’t change, we also manifest those things all over again. So it is really important to have that mind and a consciousness around it as well.

Conclusion

Myrna: Learn more about the, chakras, and Jenny’s APP Love 365 by visiting her on the web at www.jennymannion.com. There you get links to everything in her community and her courses. Sign up for the free healing sessions that I offer and yeah, and the first and if you do sign up for Love 365 you learn about the, chakras, every single day for a week, one a day and then you get a love through the, chakra healing meditation, at the end. Jenny’s handle on social media is @jennymannion

Thanks for tuning into the Transform Your Mind podcast and blog. If you have done so already, please subscribe rate and review us on iTunes.

Additional Resources

Understanding How to Use Reiki Energy for Mind and Body

March 24, 2021March 25, 2021

How to Program Your Subconscious Mind for Permanent Change

The, subconscious mind, is a data-bank for everything, which is not in your, conscious mind,. It stores your beliefs, your previous experience, your memories, your skills. Everything that you have seen, done or thought is also there. It is also your guidance system. The, subconscious mind, can also be described as a tape recorder and it just plays back what it records unless you make the conscious effort at, subconscious mind reprogramming, and erase the tape and record new messages. That is the only way to affect permanent change, erase and re record.

Today on the, Transform your Mind, to Transform your Life Radio show and podcast, Coach Myrna Young interviews Neuro Linguistic Programming, NLP, Coach Van Henry. Van tells our audience why he became an, NLP, coach. He was on assignment as an engineer in South Africa during the Apartheid regime, when he had a conversation with a Black man who told him that he was told at a young age that he was unteachable, because he had a smaller brain than the white man.

Van of course told him that was a lie, that he himself was an educated black man with an engineering degree. He convinced this man that his brain was the same size as the White man, the Chinese man and all other races because God created us all equal! That was indeed, subconscious mind, programming.

This Black man was convinced, because he was looking at the evidence, Van Henry himself. He then changed his, subconscious mind, programming by rewriting the tape and re recording new information to believe that he could be educated and that he had as big a brain as the White man. This Black man went on to have a college degree and become a supervisor, leading a fulfilling life.

So as a Transformations Coach, I would like to do the same for you. The lie that you tell yourself can be anything. It does not have to be that you are not as smart enough, pretty enough, thin enough etc. ; you could believe that you are limited by any other belief that is holding you in bondage.

Transform your Mind Soundcloud podcast

How the, subconscious mind, works

Your, subconscious mind, is an unquestioning servant that works day and night to make your behavior fits a pattern consistent with your emotionalized thoughts, hopes, and desires. Your, subconscious mind, grows either flowers or weeds in the garden of your life, whichever you plant by the mental equivalents you create.

Your, subconscious mind, has what is called a homeostatic impulse. It keeps your body temperature at 98.6 degrees Fahrenheit, just as it keeps you breathing regularly and keeps your heart beating at a certain rate. Through your autonomic nervous system, it maintains a balance among the hundreds of chemicals in your billions of cells so that your entire physical machine functions in complete harmony most of the time.

Your, subconscious mind, also practices homeostasis in your mental realm, by keeping you thinking and acting in a manner consistent with what you have done and said in the past.

Neuro Linguistic Programming, is the art of training the, subconscious mind, to achieve a goal.

The first thing you have to do to, subconscious mind reprogramming, is to Master Self. Master your self talk, master your beliefs.
Then you have to write your goals down and give them form.
Once you give them form, you have to tell someone who can hold you accountable.
This does two things. Firstly, once you speak your goals into the atmosphere you activate the, Laws of Attraction, and secondly it motivates you to not look like a failure to the person holding you accountable.
The forth thing is to access your values to be sure there is no conflict with your beliefs. This is where awareness comes in. You have to know who you are.

You have to know Yourself, to Grow Yourself

Transform your Mind iTunes

For you to grow, to get out of your comfort zone, you have to be willing to feel awkward and uncomfortable doing new things the first few times. If it’s worth doing well, it’s worth doing poorly until you get a feel for it, until you develop a new comfort zone at a new, higher level of competence.

Subconscious Mind Reprogramming

For those looking to expand their realm of comfort zones, I highly recommend considering the habits of successful people as they are the patterns commonly adopted by the minds of great leaders and thinkers. Unlocking the power of these behaviors will put you one step closer to being able to make the same things happen in your life.

Learning techniques for, subconscious mind reprogramming, will help you believe in yourself because your confidence will no longer be challenged by fear of the unknown. But more importantly, doing so will train your brain to be in line with your true desires, dreams, and life goals and a mission driven life.

The more in tune with your, subconscious mind, you become, the closer you will be to breaking through to success. For example, you might have an idea for a book that has been on your back burner for years. With the right level of confidence, you’ll take the next step in learning how to write a book, rather than clinging to the dream, but never acting.

Listen to this YouTube video and hear directly from, NLP, coach Van Henry on How to Program your, subconscious mind, for permanent change. Once you believe, then you can achieve!.

You become a master builder, as your coach I will give you the tools to help you build.

If you are a coach or an author and you would like to be a guest on the “Mindset Transformation Talk Radio Show” email me at info@myhelps.us

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Additional Resources

https://blog.myhelps.us/how-to-reprogram-your-unconscious-mind/

https://blog.myhelps.us/who-is-tending-your-mind-garden/

March 19, 2021March 25, 2021

5 Mindset Shifts For Couples to Have Fantastic Relationships

mindset shifts for long term relationships

If you want a fantastic, relationship, with your significant other, you need some mindset shifts, from thinking like a girlfriend to thinking like his wife.

Mindset shifts or, transformation, is necessary if your belief system is not producing the results you are expecting in life. As a Life and, Transformation, Coach, I wanted to share some, mindset, transformations about relationships that may get you better results.

5 Mindset Shifts

1. What is the right reason to enter into a long term relationship?

Most of us (including me before I was enlightened) feel that we should enter into a long term commitment because we “fell” in love.
Others may enter into a long term, relationship, like marriage because they want children; they want security or even to stem loneliness. But, according to Neale Donald Walsch from the “Conversations with God” series, we should put a little more thought into choosing a long term partner than feelings.

We should enter into a long term partnership for a mutually beneficial purpose.

I was watching an very old episode of Oprah a few weeks ago and she was interviewing the Smith’s. I was so impressed with Will Smith and Jada Pinketh Smith’s philosophy on marriage and family. They had a mutually beneficial purpose for their, relationship, and it continues today. They have family meetings every week to keep the purpose of the marriage and family in front of them.

Their purpose for getting together was to enhance the lives of others and they do that by always choosing work that inspires others.
And even though we have heard many rumors of the marriage failing, it is still standing because their purpose for it is greater than the two of them.

So when two people enter in a, long term relationship, they have the, mindset, to figure out the Why? What is the mutually beneficial purpose?
Are they wanting to bring up children for a purpose?
Like Will and Jada Smith
-Are they wanting to enhance Gods kingdom?
Like Joel and Victoria Osteen
-Are they going to change the world through leadership?
Like Barack and Michelle Obama?

If the purpose is strong it will be like a house built on the rocks, it will withstand the storms

Why relationships Fail

2. Mindset Shifts, Why do relationships fail?
Statistics show that, relationships, fail because of failed expectations.
Most, relationships, start out with each party having predefined expectations about what they want out of the relationship and what they want from the other person.

Contrary to popular opinion another person cannot complete you, you must complete yourself.

The bible teaches that it is not if another person will disappoint, but when. So when you enter into a, relationship, and its survival is based on what the other person does, says, etc. You will always be disappointed.

Mindset shifts, is necessary to become the best you, to make sure you are living up to your ideal self because we can never change another person, we can only change ourselves.
For example, there is conflict over a wife’s expectation that her husband takes her out on romantic dinners once per month. She is waiting on him to make the offer and he doesn’t, instead he goes out with his friends and leaves her at home with the kids.
She has several options:
Sulking, picking a fight, going out with her girlfriends – none of which heals the relationship – or she can Give That Which She Wants.
She can take him to dinner, she can cook a romantic dinner and send the kids to the babysitter. She can respond with love.

Anything you want, you first have to give.

Mindset Shift – Take care of yourself First

3. Mindset shifts: – Become self-centered.
I know this is going to shock some, because we were all brought up to believe that being selfish and self-centered is bad; but not according to the bible! The bible teaches that we must love others as we love ourselves.

Our first relationship must be with self.

We must learn to honor and cherish self and love ourselves before we can love another.
We can never truly fall in love with another, until we have truly fallen in love with ourselves.
I know women are always sacrificing self for others, they think it makes for a good relationship; but it has the opposite effect.

They get burnt out and then resentment sets in. Then they start to resent their spouse for doing nothing. They cultivated that attitude.
The old saying that you have to train people how to treat you is truth. You start off doing all the work in the home, looking after the kids, doing all the cooking, while your spouse drinks beer and watch TV, then 5 years later when you are burnt out. You shouldn’t blame your spouse!

You should be self centered and make time in the day for your self.
Get up and go to the gym, walk, pray or meditate.
Make time in the evening to reflect, learn something, relax!
Everyone around you will benefit.

4. Mindset shifts: – Being hurt and disappointed

We will all have hurt and disappointments in our lives.
In fact there is an old saying that says:

You are either going through something, coming out of something or about to go through something!

It is time for us to adopt a different response to our challenges and disappointments.
As humans we react with pain and hurt to what another is being, saying or doing.
The first thing we should do is to become conscious and aware of the feelings we are having.
Don’t run from the pain, don’t mask it with drugs or alcohol. Feel it, acknowledge it.
Try to find yourself in it.
Be honest with your feelings.

It is very important to not react with vengeance or rage, and to understand your true feelings.
Once you feel it and acknowledge it, it’s power over you diminishes and you can get to the place of this of

“This too shall pass”.
After that you can then reach for your highest self and look for the lessons.

A master knows that all experiences comes to teach and is for self-growth.

5. Mindset shifts, – Forgive or look past behaviors of your spouse or significant

As Christians we are taught to forgive, if we want to forgiveness.
To not judge before we take the plank out of our own eyes.
So it would seem that the Christian thing to do is to forgive our spouses for his/her sins.
But in the book “Conversations with God” by Neale Donald Walsh

The author teaches that you should always do what’s best for us. Remember we are self-centered.
Your girl friends are always going to encourage you to leave your husband because he is a cheater.
Walsch says that you should leave your spouse only if it is best action for you or your children.
You leave when the marriage no longer fulfills its purpose.

Let’s look at Hilary Clinton. I believe she married Bill Clinton with a purpose. He has always been a cheater but she saw his potential as a future President; So she proposed to him and chose to overlook his infidelity. She chose self!
Today her daughter is living a purpose driven life, She was First Lady of the Unites States of America and could become the first female President of the United States of America. You have never heard of her infidelity even though we have heard all about her husband’s.
We should all follow her lead and leave our cheating spouses to God, we should concern ourselves only with self. Being the best we can be and we will get our crown here on earth as well as our heavenly crown in the next life.

Myrna is the Host of the “Mindset Transformation radio show” on

https://www.wdjyfm.com/#!on-air/cee5 every Wednesday from 5:00 pm to 6:00 pm

If you would like to be a guest or become a sponsor contact her at info@myhelps.us.

Listen to past broadcasts of the “Mindset Transformations radio show” on the Myhelps Youtube Channel
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC8p2lfxF2GhOihRv8N3EZeA

Subscribe to the Transform your Mind podcast on iTunes

Additional Resources:

https://blog.myhelps.us/surviving-r-kelly-mindset-sexual-predator/

How to Get and How to Keep a Man

March 7, 2021March 19, 2021

How to Awaken to Your Soul Purpose

Your, soul purpose, is to awaken to consciousness and have a human experience through your body. Your, soul, or spirit is eternal.

Welcome to the mindset transformation radio show and podcast. Today’s show is very special to me! I am going to share with you an interview with Neale Donald Walsh, author of, “The Conversations with God,” series on, “How to Awaken Your Soul’s Purpose,”
This is special to me because his book revealed deep truths to me. My eyes were opened in wonderment!
Here are some of the revelations from the book “The Conversations with God’

Truths about Prayer and Soul Purpose

When you pray in order for your prayer to be received by God it must be in a frequency that he can hear. Just as you cannot hear this radio program if my words were not modulated to be transported over the communication lines and then demodulated back so that you can hear them. It is the same way that prayer works. Except the modulator is faith. Jesus never healed anyone who did not have faith. He said “Your faith has made you whole” So if you are asking God to grand you the desires of your heart and you don’t believe that he will, your prayers will never be answered unless it is connected to your, soul purpose.

The other part of the prayer mechanics is this:
You will not have that which you ask, nor anything you want because your request is a statement of lack.
Saying you want a thing only works to produce that precise experience – wanting- in your reality.
Abraham of the Law of Attraction books teaches the same thing.
You have to see yourself in position of the thing you want and not what you don’t want, because if you think of what you don’t want, that is exactly what you will attract and that will show up. Wondering why you keep attracting the same no good man into your experience? That is because you are so detailed in what you don’t want in a man and the Universe complies!

So when you pray you must engage faith and thank God for giving you the desires of your heart and your, soul purpose. You need to tell him all the things you do want in a man. Be just as detailed and then believe him for it. Walk in it. Believe that you already have such a man!

Truths about Relationships and Purpose

It is only through your relationship with people, places and events that you can exist in the universe. You are only who you are, relative to what another person is not. That is why opposites attract! Your, soul, is always looking for its counterpart to complete itself!

When human relationships fail (and they never really fail, they just did not produce the result you wanted), is because they were entered into for reasons not beneficial to their survival and, soul purpose.
The, purpose, of a relationship is to decide what part of yourself you would like to see show up not what part of another you can capture and hold. This revelation made me look at the, purpose, of my marriage from Gods eyes.
The good news is that this marriage survived when the others failed because it had a purpose. One of them was to reveal myself to me.

Truths about Abundance and Soul Purpose

What is an abundant mindset?
Let’s say that you are walking down the road one day and you see a homeless person begging on the street corner. You go into your wallet and notice you have $7, a $5dollar bill and 2 singles. You start to give the homeless person the $5 bill but decide instead to get him the 2 singles. Why did you change your mind about giving the $5 bill? Was it because you felt that it was too much money to part with? Did you feel that you needed it more than the homeless person?

None of these answers suggest an abundant mindset. You are operating from a spirit of lack.
The most rapid way to change a root thought or sponsoring idea is to reverse the thought-word-deed process.
Do the deed that you want to have the new thought about, then say the words that you want to have the new thought about. Do this often and you’ll train the mind to think a new way.
You are what you think you are. When the thought is a negative one, you have to find a way to break out of the cycle. So much of your present experience is based on your previous thought.

Abundance Mindset and Purpose

Let’s say You need $5000 more to close on your new home. You receive a message from God to give $2000 to a sister in the church who just lost her house in a fire. You obey because you have faith that your God is able. Your common sense tells you that you are stupid and that you will never get the money back; but you act on Gods promise. You use the words that God will provide the increase.
He does, a few days later; a check for $10,000 shows up in the mail.
I listened to a message from Joyce Meyers a few weeks back, she shared a similar story. She said that she was broke and laying in bed age her Breast cancer surgery feeling very fearful about her financial situation. Both she and her husband was in full time ministry and depended on her ability to preach for their income. She wouldn’t be able to work for some time.
Then the doorbell rang and someone brought her a check for $10,000. Someone she did not know, but who God sent. From that moment, onward she did not operate out of fear or lack, she knew that God was able. When you are on a journey that matches your, soul purpose, miracles happen.

Soul expressions

When was the last time you cried with joy, wrote poetry, made music, danced in the rain, baked a pie, painted anything, fixed something that was broken, kissed a baby, held a cat to your face, kissed your dog, swam naked, walked at sunrise, played a harmonica, talked till dawn, made love for hours on a beach or in the woods, communed with nature, searched for God, sat alone in silence, or traveled to the deepest part of your being?
When was the last time you said hello to your, soul?
Wow! After reading this I made note to say hello to my, soul, more often. I need to go skinny dipping at the beach, I need to dance in the rain and make love for hours in the woods!

So how do you awaken to your soul purpose?

Your, soul, doesn’t care what you do for a living, the, soul, only cares what you are being, while you are doing what you are doing.

The function of the, soul, is to indicate its desire, not impose it.
The function of the mind is to choose from its alternatives.
The function of the body is to act out that choice.
Your, soul, has brought you to the words you are reading or listening to right now.

How I found my, soul purpose.

One day I was reading a local newspaper. Who reads newspapers these days? I never did. But this day now only did a newspaper appear in my space; but I was guided to pick it up and flip through the pages. In one of the pages was a photograph of someone I thought I recognized so I stopped to look at it. It had her name and the title beside her name, Life coach! I had never seen that word before or heard it anywhere but I knew immediately that was what I was supposed to do.
My, soul, has been directing me all my life. It always brings me to where I need to be and the people I need to be with.

True masters are those who have chosen to make a life, rather than a living.

Life’s irony is that as soon as worldly goods and worldly success are of no concern to you, the way is open for them to flow to you.
I do this for free! Open the windows of heaven Lord!

There comes a time in the evolution of every, soul, when the chief concern is no longer the survival of the physical body, but the growth of the, spirit; no longer the attainment of worldly success but the realization of self.

The goal and, purpose, of your, soul, is to fully realize itself while in your body. To become the embodiment of all that it really is.

Listen to the author Neale Donald Walsh go into detail

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Additional Resources

How to Accelerate Your Soul Journey: Clear these Money Blocks