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Is it Possible to Love Your Enemy?

Can we love our enemy?

This is life coach Myrna Young and today I want to teach on the topic “Loving Your Enemy”.

In the King James Version of the Bible: Jesus Christ, says “But I say unto you, love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you.”

He goes further to say “do not resist an evil person. If anyone slaps you on the right cheek, turn to them the other cheek also”

Listen to the audio here: 

https://pdcn.co/e/https://chrt.fm/track/897G7/www.buzzsprout.com/1761155/9513477-is-it-possible-to-love-your-enemy.mp3?download=true

What does it mean to love your enemy

Most humans in the natural cannot live by the doctrine to, love your enemies, and neither could I, until I, transformed my mindset. You see the reason, Jesus Christ,  taught us to love our, enemies, is that the power of love, transforms.

For the last 9 months I have been in a battle with my, enemy. A racist neighbor who is the Vice President on my HOA. For months I allowed her to steal my peace. I know that evil intentions against another is a, karmic debt, so I battled against this, enemy, with my, spiritual warfare prayers.

Spiritual Warfare Prayer

Father God as we enter in spiritual warfare please cover us in your armor the breastplate of righteousness, faith, and the power of your word.

Let no weapon formed formed against me penetrate our heart and that all weapons formed against me and my family be returned to the sender void.

Anoint me of God that I will be strong in the word and I will be able to stand against the enemy.

Bless my heart and my tongue with the words of warfare in Jesus name.

I decree and declare that the anointing of Elisha will be upon me. That the God of Elisha and Joshua answer me by fire, that the sun and the moon won’t recognize me in this time of warfare. That the works of the enemy would not succeed and all the darts of wickedness will be sent back to the sender in the powerful name of, Jesus Christ, my Lord and Savior.

Father bless me with divine strength that you gave to Jacob that I will go out prepared and that I would know your will.  That my enemies will be unseated by fire. Amen

 Don’t give back the Hate your enemy gives you

I gave her back the same, hate, she gave me and prayed for her demise until one day I was listening to the book “The seat of the soul” by Gary Zukav and was convicted when he said that when we respond to hate with hate we enlarge the energy and become the same as the person who hates us.

We should instead, love our enemies, because light always erases darkness. So I started meditating and sending my, enemy, light and understanding, because I knew, hate, is a learned behavior and she is operating from lack of knowledge.

Then a few weeks ago I was watching the Netflix movie “The Best of Enemies” the movie was about a white ,clansman, and a, black activist. The, clansman, was the president of the, Ku Klux Klan,  and he believed that the white race was superior and that black people had no rights. The, black activist, was fighting for fair housing for blacks. Then someone burnt down the black school, (this was during the segregation age) so the fight changed to school integration. The white, clansman, and the, black activist, were opposing leaders on the integration issue.

Love Your Enemy and Send Them Light

The white, clansman, had a mentality ill son who was in an institution and because we teach our kids our, hate, the boy became unhinged when they placed a black boy to share his room. The boy would scream all day saying the black boy was a monster. The white, clansman, asked  the institution to remove the black boy, but they told him if he wanted the boy removed he had to pay for a private room. The, clansman, was poor, he could not afford the $75 extra per week for a private room.

The, black activist, heard the story and felt sorry for the son of the, clansman, and used her influence to have him transferred to a private room at no cost to the, clansman.  This act of kindness and love started to change the, clansman, heart against black people. Then his white friend told him that other than his wife, the black man who was his store manager is the only one he trusts in this world, because this black man served with him in Vietnam and saved his life.

That completed the, transformation. His heart changed. The power of love and light moved in, and the darkness and hate moved out.

Dr Martin Luther King Jr on Loving our Enemies

How do you go about loving your, enemies? Dr Martin Luther King Jr says, I think the first thing is this: In order to, love your enemies, you must begin by analyzing self. And I’m sure that seems strange to you, that I start out telling you this morning that you, love your enemies, by beginning with a look at self. It seems to me that that is the first and foremost way to come to an adequate discovery to the how of this situation.

Now, I’m aware of the fact that some people will not like you, not because of something you have done to them, but they just won’t like you. I’m quite aware of that.

Some people aren’t going to like You
  • Some people aren’t going to like the way you talk.
  • Most people aren’t going to like you because you can do your job better than they can do theirs.
  • People aren’t going to like you because other people like you, and because you’re popular, and because you’re well-liked, they aren’t going to like you.
  • Some aren’t going to like you because your hair is a little shorter than theirs or your hair is a little longer than theirs.
  • Some of them won’t like you because your skin is a little brighter than theirs; and others aren’t going to like you because your skin is a little darker than theirs.
  • Some are going to dislike you, not because of something that you’ve done to them, but because of various jealous reactions and other reactions that are so prevalent in human nature.

Who is Your Enemy

But after looking at these things and admitting these things, we must face the fact that an, enemy,  might dislike us because of something that we’ve done in the past.  Some personality attribute that we possess, something that we’ve done in the past and we’ve forgotten about it; but it was that something that aroused the, hate response, within the individual. That is why I say, begin with yourself. There might be something within you that arouses the tragic, hate response, in the other individual.

And this is what Jesus means when he said: “How is it that you can see the mote in your brother’s eye and not see the beam in your own eye?” Or to put it in Moffatt’s translation: “How is it that you see the splinter in your brother’s eye and fail to see the plank in your own eye?” And this is one of the tragedies of human nature. So we begin to love our enemies and love those persons that hate us whether in collective life or individual life by looking at ourselves.

A second thing that an individual must do in seeking to, love his enemy, is to discover the element of good in his enemy.  Every time you begin to, hate, that person and think of hating that person, realize that there is some good there.  Look at those good points which should over-balance the bad points.

Can we love our enemy?

So, the question is can we, love our enemies? I say we can. There is a saying that unforgiveness is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die. I say, hate, is the same way.

Joel Osteen teaches that when we stamp things negative, we allow them to steal our joy and happiness. I stamp, hate, from my, enemy, as positive, because I believe that God will turn whatever my, enemy, meant to harm me for my good. His word says

“’For I know the plans I have for you, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

Until next time blessings

Additional Resources

Is Love the Same in Christianity, Hinduism and Buddhism?

 

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How to Reprogram your Unconscious Mind

unconscious mind

Your, unconscious mind,  is carrying out behaviors that sabotage your, conscious mind, 24 hours per day. In fact studies show that our, subconscious,  mind,  is running our lives 95% of the time. If you don’t,  reprogram your subconscious mind, you will continue to run the same, subconscious  programs, like a a tape recorder.  We have to erase the tape and rewrite the tape for it to play new programs.  Listen to the interview to learn how to, reprogram your unconscious mind.

Listen to the full interview here: 

Introduction, Unconscious mind

Whenever you are on autopilot, you are running, unconscious mind.  Have you ever gotten in your car and driven to your destination and you don’t recall how you got there.  That is your, unconscious mind, driving you to your destination.

Autopilot is just one of your, subconscious programs,  that has to do with your beliefs.

These, subconscious  programs, were downloaded to you before your 7th birthday are the programs your, unconscious mind,  play until you die; unless you, reprogram your subconscious mind.

Even if you become aware of your, subconscious programs, you still continue the behaviors because the, unconscious mind,  will keep playing the same, subconscious programs.  Think about your vinyl record.  Unless you scratch the record, it will play the same song forever!

When I was growing up my activity of choice  was reading Harlequin romances. I was brainwashed into believing that love looked and acted in a certain way. For example, all the leading men in my Harlequin romance novels, were rugged, tall, dark and good looking. All the leading ladies were independent and did not want a man’s help; so the man and the woman ended up feuding and hating each other until they realized that all, this attention they are placing on each other fighting,  were actually the flip side of love!

These lovers, leading men and ladies were never a good match.  Chemistry and raw physical attraction lead the way.  Thirty years later, I was still playing that, subconscious program,  It wasn’t until I met my husband that I started looking on the inside of a man, and not what he presented on the outside that I was able to, reprogram my unconscious mind,

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I was listening to a sermon by, Joel Osteen, a few months back and he was telling the story of, subconscious programs, with his sister. Joel said his sister was praying and asking God for a husband and God sent her a wonderful man; but she rejected him because he had red hair. He did not fit her, subconscious programs, for a mate. It took her years to reprogram her mindset  and love this man.

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Did you grow up in a home where your dad worked and your mom stayed home and watched the kids? You never saw your dad because he was always working and your family just had enough? That is your model of a family and today you are probably still running this, subconscious programs,

 

What is your, Unconscious Mind,  that needs to be rewritten?

I was a foster mom for years.  I see the, unconscious mind, in foster and adopted kids all the time. Especially since most of them came into foster care system before their 7th birthday.  They developed programs on, abandonment, attachment disorders, survival, most of them hoard food because their, unconscious mind, and  lack and survival.

Here are 5,  subconscious programs, Teenagers are running today

  1. Make generalizations (no one loves me, I’m always going to be a failure, I’ll never get a job or pass this test)
  2. Make choices and judgment based on past experiences.

3. Settle in life, don’t apply for jobs or get involved in extra curricular activities.

4. Reviews information and draws conclusions.

If someone breaks their heart, they learn to not trust people – to avoid being hurt again. If living in poverty, feel like will never get enough money to make it out of poverty. If get in a fight, feel they always need to protect them self

    5.  Accepts information literally and personally (take a lot of things said to heart, but not as constructive criticism)

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How to control your, Unconscious Mind

  1. A mental picture is worth a thousand words. Your, unconscious mind, will bring to pass any picture held in the mind and backed by faith.

This is the space I am spending a lot of time in, at the moment.  I am working on visualizing my goals and desires and speaking, affirmations.   I am having a hard time of it, because I am not a visual person. But this is the first step in controlling the, unconscious mind,  Visualizing what you want.  Let the, unconscious mind, find the way, you only have to give it the destination.

For example if you want to be married by the age of 30 and have 3 kids.  That is the mental picture you give your, unconscious mind,  The universe will find the man and arrange the kids! Just say, affirmations, every day to reprogram your, unconscious mind.

Daily Affirmations, like:

  • I will get married to the man of my dreams by age 30
  • The Universe will deliver to me the man of my dreams by the time I am 30
  • I will get married by age 30 and have 3 kids by age 35

Remember to give your, unconscious mind, only instructions that would elevate and heal. It is the secret to your success. Your, unconscious mind, cannot take a joke. Don’t say things like with my luck the man that shows up would be bowed legged with buck teeth!   Because guess what, hold that image in your mind for any length of time and that is what you will get, a bow legged man with buck teeth. Trust me on this.

Transform your Mind Stitcher
Transform your Mind Stitcher
  1. Use, Autosuggestion, to improve any degradation.

About 10 years ago I read, Deepak Chopra’s,  book called “Grow Younger, Live Longer” In this book Deepak taught us to say, affirmations, every day.  It went like this.

Daily Affirmations for aging younger

  • Every day, in every way, I am getting younger and younger,
  • my biological clock is set at a healthy 30 years of age,
  • I look and feel a healthy 30 years of age.
  • Every day I am renewing my mind and body by eating healthy foods,
  • I take nutritional supplements wisely, etc.

I don’t remember all of it.  I was saying these, affirmations, around my 40th birthday.  So over 20 years ago.  I still remember those, affirmations, because I said them every day for several months.

This year on  my 60th birthday, I posted a picture on Facebook and this girl commented.  She said “It is like you stopped aging at 30 years old.  You just said F**K it!  I am not getting any older! I do look 20 years younger than my chronological age and that’s because I rewrote my, subconscious programs,!

How to Rewrite  Your Subconscious Mind

In my, conscious mind, I was always planning out my future and all things I wanted it to entail.  I told myself, you will never be broke, you’re a go getter and you will always meet your basic necessities because of that.  This mindset, relays into my life because it reminds me that failure is never an option and all things are possible because I know it is.

Many times, I feel that I have programmed my, unconscious mind, for the success.  I heal myself faster from injuries.  For example, one time my eye was swollen, and I had a workshop coming up in 2 days.  I said to my, subconscious mind, don’t sweat it, you are going to get a warm rag and sleep with it on your eye, then you will use antibiotics and by the day of your workshop it will be gone.

Sure enough, the eye was not swollen anymore and I was able to facilitate my workshop with two functional eyes.  Furthermore, despite all the adversity I have experienced in my life, I was always sure that I would finish University and get my degree.  I programmed my, unconscious mind, to  prepare for the test.

Remember the, unconscious mind, is carrying out behaviors that sabotage the, conscious mind.

Our, subconscious programs, doesn’t stop at age 7; but continues for the rest of our lives.

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Getting Past our, Subconscious Programs

  1. Take risks to get past, subconscious programs,  Your, unconscious mind,  always wants to play it safe.
  2. Ask questions like, What else is possible that I have not considered?
  3. Say things like, how cool is it that I have all this extra money.

4. What am I going to do with all this extra cash?

5. How can I make this a reality?

6. What if I become a successful as a TV talk show host?  What would that look like? See yourself in this role. This one is for me!!

Conclusion reprogram your unconscious mind

This strategy is called, auto inquisition.  Thomas Edison practiced, auto inquisition. He would sit in a chair and ask his, unconscious mind, questions about an invention.  You can do the same.

    1. Give yourself permission to be successful, believe that you deserve good things to happen
    2. Don’t allow other peoples fears to make you doubt yourself.
    3. Surround yourself with positive reinforcement and allies.
    4. Speak your success as present fact not a future plan.  Instead of saying I am figuring out how to do that now, say I am strategist.  What do I need to make that happen right now.
    5. Start asking for what you want and keep track of all the things that have happened (gratitude journal)
    6. Create a vision space, so you can imagine what it is you want to happen in your life.

Additional Resources Unconscious mind

“Keeping a healthy mind is important to have a balanced life. Mental health training can help you enhance self-awareness providing tips and knowledge about this topic”.

How to Live in Infinite Possibility

https://blog.myhelps.us/how-to-use-intuition-to-transform-your-life/

https://blog.myhelps.us/how-to-program-your-subconscious-for-permanent-change/

https://inlpcenter.org/five-step-process-for-releasing-limiting-beliefs/

 

 

 

 

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Real Estate Investing with No Money

Real estate investing with no money

Real estate investor, Trainer Trevor Evans, teaches, how to invest in real estate with No Money. Trevor teaches, how to get funding for your deals, fix and flip,  your, investment properties, and, how to flip a house.

Watch the YouTube video to learn how to Invest in Real Estate from a, Rich Dad, real estate investor.

What you will learn about Real Estate Investing in this motivational video:

1. What are some strategies to purchase property for your,  real estate investing, business with little or no cash?

There are several way to do this. You can max out your credit cards, you can set up a lease to own deal, you can get seller financing.

2. What does, Hard money lenders, look for in a good deal?

They look for the ROI or return on investment

3. How do you make your deal attractive to a, Hard money lender?

Show that the resale value is at least 40% higher that the investment.

Strategies using other people’s money to fund your, real estate investments:

1. Using your credit cards to fund your deals. The more credit you have the better off you are!

2. Hard money Lenders,  Hard money lenders,  look at the asset and not at your credit score.

3. Borrow money from friends and family. You convert them into, Hard Money lenders, and pay them a good interest rate to start your, house flipping, business.

4. Borrow from your Whole Life Insurance policy.

2. Take a loan from your 401K.

3. Take out an Equity line of credit on your personal house.

 

The commonly used strategy in, real estate investing,  is the use of a, Hard Money Lender.

You need a, Hard money lender, for your, real estate investing, business. A money lender does not look at your credit, what does he look for?

1. Your expertise. Most, Hard money lenders, want you to have three investments under your name. This does not include your personal residence.

2. The ARV or after repair value. The property must have equity before the deal is made.

3. How did the property come on the market. Eg is it a Foreclosure, short sale or probate.

4. What is your, exit strategy? Is your, exit strategy, to, buy and hold, or, fix and flip?

5. How long you need to complete rehab work.

6. How much is the estimated cost of repairs.

 

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Hard Money Lender do not offer 100% Financing

Make no mistake, hard money lenders, need borrowers to deploy their capital and get a return on investment for their capital partners. They often enjoy repeat business, real estate investing, aren’t typically one-time borrowers, so asset-based lenders like, hard money lenders, or, private money lenders, value the business relationships they develop with quality borrowers.

Real estate investing, with no money down or little or no cash is to borrow from, Hard money lenders, who charge high interest for short term loans. When, hard money lenders, provide a loan, they want to be confident that the, borrower, is able to repay the loan on time. If the, borrower, isn’t able to pay back the loan, this creates a great deal of extra work, stress and potential financial loss for the lender. A strong, borrower, with a significant down payment (or equity in the property) and cash reserves has the best chance of obtaining a, hard money loan, and succeeding with their, real estate, project.

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Looking for a, Hard Money Lender? Here is an article from Connected Investors on how to get bids on your project.

Transform Your Mind iHeart Radio
iHeart Radio

Connected Investors, the world’s largest, real estate investing, network and marketplace, today announced the launch of the first centralized real estate investment funding portal, CiX.com. The technology allows real estate investors to quickly and easily submit their deals to a network of asset-based lenders, ensuring the best terms for loans on their, investment properties.

Subscribe to the Transform you Mind podcast with Coach Myrna to get notification of all shows, Life coaching tips as well as Real Estate Investment tips and strategies.

Additional Resources

How to Create the Freedom Lifestyle through Real Estate Investments.

How to Build Wealth with Turnkey Real Estate Investing

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How to Program Your Subconscious Mind for Permanent Change

subconscious mind reprogramming

The, subconscious mind, is a data-bank for everything, which is not in your, conscious mind,. It stores your beliefs, your previous experience, your memories, your skills. Everything that you have seen, done or thought is also there. It is also your guidance system. The, subconscious mind, can also be described as a tape recorder and it just plays back what it records unless you make the conscious effort at, subconscious mind reprogramming, and  erase the tape and record new messages.  That is the only way to affect permanent change, erase and re record.

Today on the, Transform your Mind, to Transform your Life Radio show and podcast, Coach Myrna Young interviews Neuro Linguistic Programming, NLP, Coach Van Henry. Van tells our audience why he became an, NLP, coach. He was on assignment as an engineer in South Africa during the Apartheid regime, when he had a conversation with a Black man who told him that he was told at a young age that he was unteachable, because he had a smaller brain than the white man.

Van of course told him that was a lie, that he himself was an educated black man with an engineering degree. He convinced this man that his brain was the same size as the White man, the Chinese man and all other races because God created us all equal! That was indeed, subconscious mind, programming.

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This Black man was convinced, because he was looking at the evidence, Van Henry himself. He then changed his, subconscious mind, programming by rewriting the tape and re recording new information to believe that he could be educated and that he had as big a brain as the White man. This Black man went on to have a college degree and become a supervisor, leading a fulfilling life.

So as a Transformations Coach, I would like to do the same for you. The lie that you tell yourself can be anything. It does not have to be that you are not as smart enough, pretty enough, thin enough etc. ; you could believe that you are limited by any other belief that is holding you in bondage.

Soundcloud Transform your mind podcast
Transform your Mind Soundcloud podcast

How the, subconscious mind, works

Your, subconscious mind, is an unquestioning servant that works day and night to make your behavior fits a pattern consistent with your emotionalized thoughts, hopes, and desires. Your, subconscious mind, grows either flowers or weeds in the garden of your life, whichever you plant by the mental equivalents you create.

Your, subconscious mind, has what is called a homeostatic impulse. It keeps your body temperature at 98.6 degrees Fahrenheit, just as it keeps you breathing regularly and keeps your heart beating at a certain rate. Through your autonomic nervous system, it maintains a balance among the hundreds of chemicals in your billions of cells so that your entire physical machine functions in complete harmony most of the time.

Your, subconscious mind, also practices homeostasis in your mental realm, by keeping you thinking and acting in a manner consistent with what you have done and said in the past.

Neuro Linguistic Programming, is the art of training the, subconscious mind, to achieve a goal.

  1. The first thing you have to do to, subconscious mind reprogramming, is to Master Self. Master your self talk, master your beliefs.
  2. Then you have to write your goals down and give them form.
  3. Once you give them form, you have to tell someone who can hold you accountable.
    This does two things. Firstly, once you speak your goals into the atmosphere you activate the, Laws of Attraction, and secondly it motivates you to not look like a failure to the person holding you accountable.
  4. The forth thing is to access your values to be sure there is no conflict with your beliefs. This is where awareness comes in. You have to know who you are.

You have to know Yourself, to Grow Yourself

Transform your Mind Stitcher
Transform your Mind iTunes 

For you to grow, to get out of your comfort zone, you have to be willing to feel awkward and uncomfortable doing new things the first few times. If it’s worth doing well, it’s worth doing poorly until you get a feel for it, until you develop a new comfort zone at a new, higher level of competence.

Subconscious Mind Reprogramming

For those looking to expand their realm of comfort zones, I highly recommend considering the habits of successful people as they are the patterns commonly adopted by the minds of great leaders and thinkers. Unlocking the power of these behaviors will put you one step closer to being able to make the same things happen in your life.

Learning techniques for, subconscious mind reprogramming, will help you believe in yourself because your confidence will no longer be challenged by fear of the unknown. But more importantly, doing so will train your brain to be in line with your true desires, dreams, and life goals and a mission driven life. 

The more in tune with your, subconscious mind, you become, the closer you will be to breaking through to success. For example, you might have an idea for a book that has been on your back burner for years. With the right level of confidence, you’ll take the next step in learning how to write a book, rather than clinging to the dream, but never acting.

Listen to this YouTube video and hear directly from, NLP, coach Van Henry on How to Program your, subconscious mind, for permanent change. Once you believe, then you can achieve!.

You become a master builder, as your coach I will give you the tools to help you build.

Transform Your Mind iHeart Radio
iHeart Radio

 

If you are a coach or an author and you would like to be a guest on the “Mindset Transformation Talk Radio Show” email me at info@myhelps.us

Subscribe to get a copy of all new shows

Additional Resources

https://blog.myhelps.us/how-to-reprogram-your-unconscious-mind/

https://blog.myhelps.us/who-is-tending-your-mind-garden/

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5 Mindset Shifts For Couples to Have Fantastic Relationships

mindset shifts for long term relationships

If you want a fantastic, relationship, with your significant other, you need some mindset shifts, from thinking like a girlfriend to thinking like his wife.

Mindset shifts or, transformation, is necessary if your belief system is not producing the results you are expecting in life. As a Life and, Transformation, Coach, I wanted to share some, mindset, transformations about relationships that may get you better results.

5 Mindset Shifts

1. What is the right reason to enter into a long term relationship?

Most of us (including me before I was enlightened) feel that we should enter into a long term commitment because we “fell” in love.
Others may enter into a long term, relationship, like marriage because they want children; they want security or even to stem loneliness. But, according to Neale Donald Walsch from the “Conversations with God” series, we should put a little more thought into choosing a long term partner than feelings.

 

We should enter into a long term partnership for a mutually beneficial purpose.

I was watching an very old episode of Oprah a few weeks ago and she was interviewing the Smith’s. I was so impressed with Will Smith and Jada Pinketh Smith’s philosophy on marriage and family. They had a mutually beneficial purpose for their, relationship, and it continues today. They have family meetings every week to keep the purpose of the marriage and family in front of them.

Their purpose for getting together was to enhance the lives of others and they do that by always choosing work that inspires others.
And even though we have heard many rumors of the marriage failing, it is still standing because their purpose for it is greater than the two of them.

  • So when two people enter in a, long term relationship, they have the, mindset, to figure out the Why? What is the mutually beneficial purpose?
    Are they wanting to bring up children for a purpose?
    Like Will and Jada Smith
    -Are they wanting to enhance Gods kingdom?
    Like Joel and Victoria Osteen
    -Are they going to change the world through leadership?
    Like Barack and Michelle Obama?

If the purpose is strong it will be like a house built on the rocks, it will withstand the storms

Why relationships Fail

2. Mindset Shifts, Why do relationships fail?
Statistics show that, relationships, fail because of failed expectations.
Most, relationships, start out with each party having predefined expectations about what they want out of the relationship and what they want from the other person.

Contrary to popular opinion another person cannot complete you, you must complete yourself.

The bible teaches that it is not if another person will disappoint, but when. So when you enter into a, relationship, and its survival is based on what the other person does, says, etc. You will always be disappointed.

Mindset shifts,  is necessary to become the best you, to make sure you are living up to your ideal self because we can never change another person, we can only change ourselves.
For example, there is conflict over a wife’s expectation that her husband takes her out on romantic dinners once per month. She is waiting on him to make the offer and he doesn’t, instead he goes out with his friends and leaves her at home with the kids.
She has several options:
Sulking, picking a fight, going out with her girlfriends – none of which heals the relationship – or she can Give That Which She Wants.
She can take him to dinner, she can cook a romantic dinner and send the kids to the babysitter. She can respond with love.

Anything you want, you first have to give.

Mindset Shift – Take care of yourself First

3. Mindset shifts: – Become self-centered.
I know this is going to shock some, because we were all brought up to believe that being selfish and self-centered is bad; but not according to the bible! The bible teaches that we must love others as we love ourselves.

Our first relationship must be with self.

We must learn to honor and cherish self and love ourselves before we can love another.
We can never truly fall in love with another, until we have truly fallen in love with ourselves.
I know women are always sacrificing self for others, they think it makes for a good relationship; but it has the opposite effect.

They get burnt out and then resentment sets in. Then they start to resent their spouse for doing nothing. They cultivated that attitude.
The old saying that you have to train people how to treat you is truth. You start off doing all the work in the home, looking after the kids, doing all the cooking, while your spouse drinks beer and watch TV, then 5 years later when you are burnt out. You shouldn’t blame your spouse!

You should be self centered and make time in the day for your self.
Get up and go to the gym, walk, pray or meditate.
Make time in the evening to reflect, learn something, relax!
Everyone around you will benefit.

4. Mindset shifts:   – Being hurt and disappointed  

We will all have hurt and disappointments in our lives.
In fact there is an old saying that says:

You are either going through something, coming out of something or about to go through something!

It is time for us to adopt a different response to our challenges and disappointments.
As humans we react with pain and hurt to what another is being, saying or doing.
The first thing we should do is to become conscious and aware of the feelings we are having.
Don’t run from the pain, don’t mask it with drugs or alcohol. Feel it, acknowledge it.
Try to find yourself in it.
Be honest with your feelings.

It is very important to not react with vengeance or rage, and to understand your true feelings.
Once you feel it and acknowledge it, it’s power over you diminishes and you can get to the place of this of

“This too shall pass”.
After that you can then reach for your highest self and look for the lessons.

A master knows that all experiences comes to teach and is for self-growth.

5. Mindset shifts, – Forgive or look past behaviors of your spouse or significant 

As Christians we are taught to forgive, if we want to forgiveness.
To not judge before we take the plank out of our own eyes.
So it would seem that the Christian thing to do is to forgive our spouses for his/her sins.
But in the book “Conversations with God” by Neale Donald Walsh

The author teaches that you should always do what’s best for us. Remember we are self-centered.
Your girl friends are always going to encourage you to leave your husband because he is a cheater.
Walsch says that you should leave your spouse only if it is best action for you or your children.
You leave when the marriage no longer fulfills its purpose.

Let’s look at Hilary Clinton. I believe she married Bill Clinton with a purpose. He has always been a cheater but she saw his potential as a future President; So she proposed to him and chose to overlook his infidelity. She chose self!
Today her daughter is living a purpose driven life, She was First Lady of the Unites States of America and could become the first female President of the United States of America. You have never heard of her infidelity even though we have heard all about her husband’s.
We should all follow her lead and leave our cheating spouses to God, we should concern ourselves only with self. Being the best we can be and we will get our crown here on earth as well as our heavenly crown in the next life.

Myrna is the Host of the “Mindset Transformation radio show” on

https://www.wdjyfm.com/#!on-air/cee5 every Wednesday from 5:00 pm to 6:00 pm

If you would like to be a guest or become a sponsor contact her at info@myhelps.us.

Listen to past broadcasts of the “Mindset Transformations radio show” on the Myhelps Youtube Channel
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC8p2lfxF2GhOihRv8N3EZeA

Subscribe to the Transform your Mind podcast on iTunes 

Additional Resources:

https://blog.myhelps.us/surviving-r-kelly-mindset-sexual-predator/

How to Get and How to Keep a Man

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How to Own the Sales Process from Prospect to Client

real estate sales process

How to Own the Sales Process from Prospect to Client. i.e How to meet a prospect and walk out with a client!

In this episode, Coach Myrna Young interviews Elizabeth Gifford Maffei. Elizabeth was a multi-million dollar sales producer as a Real Estate agent, she is now a health and spiritual advocate and business coach.

Show notes Sales Process 

* What is a Challenge that entrepreneurs and business owners experience when trying to close a sale?

6 tips to close a sale quickly and effectively
  1. Identify the decision-maker and start a conversation. …
  2. Accurately qualify your prospects. …
  3. Pitch your solution (not just the product)
  4. Create a sense of urgency. …
  5. Overcome their objections. …
  6. Ask for the sale.

* What is the difference between making a sale and creating a loyal client?
* What is the first step in having a successful meeting with a prospect?

How to Prepare for a Sales Meeting As a Real Estate Agent

To be fully prepared for a successful customer meeting, you need to answer these questions:

  • Who are you meeting with?
  • Why are the two parties meeting?
  • What is the objective of the meeting?
  • When and where will it take place?
  • What is the agenda for the meeting (How)?

* How should you prepare before meeting with your prospect?
* How should a successful meeting be conducted?

Using Body Language during the Sales Process

How does the use of, body language, help, close a sale?

While it’s important to know what you should do in meetings and negotiations, knowing what you shouldn’t do is often just as important – and it begins with bad, body language.

The best sales managers know that while you may have a polished sales presentation, tasteful attire, and a product that practically sells itself, you can still miss out on, closing a sale, if your, body language, is out of sync with your words. While it’s true that first impressions make a lasting impact, cumulative, body language, is important. If you are in the habit of demonstrating any of the following, body language, in the, sales process, it could be enough to hurt your sales performance, turning a potential yes into definite no.

* What is the most important step that many business owners leave out?
* An example of a successful prospect meeting that resulted in a closed sale.

The four Stages of the Sale:

1: Qualify – Your, prospects, must have the money, the time, the need and the want to contract your services.

2: Build Rapport – People buy from people they like!
When you meet a, prospect, for the first time, it is important to find common ground. Look for similar interests or experiences and chat about them before getting into your, sales pitch.

3: Tell a story – Showcase how your product or service helped another client. It could also be a personal story of your journey to your current vocation.

4: Closing the Sale, – If you followed the first 3 stages then you don’t even need to close, just ask them to sign!
If you get to the end and you get objections, then you missed the qualify or selling the benefits.

Additional Resources

How to Build Wealth with Turnkey Real Estate Investing

Real Estate Investing with No Money

 

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5 Keys to Successful Self Leadership

Self Leadership

Success in life depends on your ability for, self leadership. You may say I am not a, leader, I am not a manager or a CEO true; but, self leadership, is more important than how many people you lead in your home or place of work.

Self leadership, is the answer to how do we develop ourselves to survive and thrive in a Volatile, Uncertain, Complex, and Ambiguous world.

Self leadership,  is the Critical Success Factor for individual and organizational success.

Here are 5 Essential Disciplines for Self Leadership 

Discipline #1 Accountability
You must learn to take full responsibility for everything on your watch. This means that the fish stinks from the head down! A great way to do this is with, self leadership, because those who follow you are watching your, leadership.

Discipline # 2 Focus
As a, Leader, you will wear many hats. Success comes from knowing where to focus your attention. Everything is important.
Acquiring the skill of discrimination allows the, leader, to discern what is most important and least important.

Discipline # 3 Organizational self leadership 

Organizational, self leadership,  is the skill through which chaos is turned into order.

Discipline # 4 Innovation
As a, leader, you will begin to consciously focus your attention and discriminate where the maximum leverage is.
You will recognize the need for continual improvement and for innovation in your processes.

Discipline # 5 Communication Skills 

Communication skills, are evident in how well you communicate your passion, vision, and mission to your employees, customers and self.

Here are 3 types of Communication Skills

The three primary means of communication are verbal, nonverbal, and visual.
  • Verbal Communication. Verbal communication depends on words to deliver meaning.
  • Nonverbal Communication. Nonverbal communication occurs when meaning or messages are sent or received without the use of words like body language.
  • Visual Communication.
Daphne Lynn Valcin is a business coach and speaker.

Daphne’s talks to us about the keys to a successful mission driven life or business.
Since 90% of startup businesses fail, Daphne believes that the quality of life and business, leadership, is at the root of success or failure.
She believes that, leadership, is about using the most effective strategies to conquer obstacles while taking consistent steps to move forward when tackling your vision, whether that vision is within the workplace, as a leader of a business or, self leadership.

Show notes:
. Daphne explains what is true, self leadership.
. What sets successful startup businesses apart from those that fail.
. How a business coach helps clients.
. What does a thriving business look like.
. What are some of the biggest mistakes companies do with their sales and marketing efforts.
. What are some of the characteristics of successful leaders.

Here are 11 strategies for effective, self leadership,  from Young Entrepreneur Council:

Leadership advice from Dale Carnegie

When managing my team, I use a tactic from Dale Carnegie: Think in terms of the other person’s wants. The goal is to align a team member’s natural talents and preferences with the company’s goals. What do they want? What motivates them? What do they like to do? Then manage them to reinforce what they want and how they can achieve those things through their work.

Additional Resources

How to Set up Your Business Structure as an Entrepreneur

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Real Estate Investing: Are Rental Properties worth the Admiration?

Investing in Rental Properties

Real Estate Investing, in Rental properties gets a lot of admiration because of, passive income.  Usually there is positive cash flow in, rental properties.

Joke of the day Rental properties 

A young woman, pursuing a graduate degree in art history, was going to Italy to study the country’s greatest works of art.
Since there was no one to look after her grandmother while she was away, she took the old lady with her.
At the Sistine Chapel in the Vatican, she pointed to the painting on the ceiling. ‘Grandma, it took Michelangelo a full four years to get that ceiling painted.’
‘Oh my, ‘the grandmother says.
‘He and I must have the same landlord!’

A few weeks ago I interviewed my co host Trevor Evans on the topic “The path to Financial Freedom” We received such an overwhelming response to that topic that I decided to have a spin off on, Real Estate Investing. This is episode #2 in the series: Real estate investing, “Funding, Fixing and Flipping. Is Owning, rental properties, worth the headache?

As a realtor for over 17 years, investing in, rental properties, has been my space up to this point. I own several rental properties and I also manage several rental properties.

My co-host for this podcast is Trevor Evans: Speaker/Trainer for Legacy Education Alliance and Rich Dad Education. Trevor is also an Entrepreneur, Real Estate Investor. Banker and Founder of Personal Awakening Brand “Being Normal Sucks.”

I met Trevor earlier in the year when I attended a Get Motivated Seminar and signed up for a 3 day, real estate investing, seminar. I met my co host Trevor Evans at this program and let’s say his vast knowledge on the subject of, real estate investing,  and, real estate, opened my mind to new opportunities.

I didn’t know what I didn’t know!

His knowledge base was extensive. I immediately enrolled in the Legacy Education Alliance, investing in real estate, training program.

Real Estate tip of the week

What is your best choice as a, real estate investment? From the book “Your money and how to keep it by Brian Costello”

Real Estate, will be a natural choice for many as an, real estate investment, vehicle. Generally, real estate, can be counted on to rise in value over a period of time. If you want short term investments, you can use short term investment vehicles like treasury bills. Other options are gold, commodities and the options market. Small investors are now also switching to Mutual funds because they offer a great deal of flexibility, and they can be cashed in at any time.
So, the best investment choice depends on your country laws as it relates to Capital Gains tax vs interest tax. In the USA and Canada, interest is taxable while you can make a lot of money tax free with capital gains.

Todays episode of Fund, Fix and Flip is sponsored by, Myrna Young Realtor 

Are you looking to invest in the south Florida market? The time is ripe for investors. Call Myrna Young  at Century 21 Selling Paradise 239-542-5777 for all your Wholesale or Rehab purchases, Buy and Hold, rental properties, or Property Management services. We are licensed in real estate and property management services and can also buy or lease your home. Don’t delay, Call today 239-542-5777

“Is Owning Rental properties worth the headache?” Show notes:

What are investors doing that is causing the headache?

  1. Not properly screening the tenant.
    Most investors are stressed to put a tenant into, rental  properties, because it costs to have a vacant property.
    That is the underlying reason that they short the screening process or decide to take a risk with a tenant. But it costs more to have the tenant removed and evicted, so the pain of a bad tenant lingers for a long time.
  2. Not understanding the renters mindset
    A renter does not have an owners mindset to take care of a property.
    The environment the rental is living in determines the mindset of the tenant. If you have a tenant in a single family home that is costing over $1500 per month.  That tenant has an owner’s mindset and would usually take care of the, rental property, as his own because he or she is probably an executive and is not renting because they can’t afford to buy.
  3. Know your tenant
    That allows you to skip inappropriate steps.
  4. Understanding the positive cash flow cycle
  5. Buy only properties that need remodeling instead of renovations
  6. Setting up warranty or replacement work directly with local scratch and dent shops
  7. Paying a flat fee to a Property Management company

Additional resources

Some resources for Real Estate Investors:
BiggerPockets: The Real Estate Investing Social Network. There are many free articles and forum threads all for free on how to get started in real estate investing.

https://www.mashvisor.com Use analytics to find lucrative traditional or Airbnb properties in a matter of minutes.

https://myhelpsrealestateinvestments.com/ – list of off market properties at discounted prices in Fort Myers, Fl and West Palm beach, Florida

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How to Awaken to Your Soul Purpose

Soul purpose

Your, soul purpose, is to awaken to consciousness and have a human experience through your body. Your, soul, or spirit is eternal.

Welcome to the mindset transformation radio show and podcast. Today’s show is very special to me! I am going to share with you an interview with Neale Donald Walsh, author of, “The Conversations with God,” series on, “How to Awaken Your Soul’s Purpose,”
This is special to me because his book revealed deep truths to me. My eyes were opened in wonderment!
Here are some of the revelations from the book “The Conversations with God’

Truths about Prayer and Soul Purpose 

When you pray in order for your prayer to be received by God it must be in a frequency that he can hear. Just as you cannot hear this radio program if my words were not modulated to be transported over the communication lines and then demodulated back so that you can hear them. It is the same way that prayer works. Except the modulator is faith. Jesus never healed anyone who did not have faith. He said “Your faith has made you whole” So if you are asking God to grand you the desires of your heart and you don’t believe that he will, your prayers will never be answered unless it is connected to your, soul purpose.

The other part of the prayer mechanics is this:
You will not have that which you ask, nor anything you want because your request is a statement of lack.
Saying you want a thing only works to produce that precise experience – wanting- in your reality.
Abraham of the Law of Attraction books teaches the same thing.
You have to see yourself in position of the thing you want and not what you don’t want, because if you think of what you don’t want, that is exactly what you will attract and that will show up. Wondering why you keep attracting the same no good man into your experience? That is because you are so detailed in what you don’t want in a man and the Universe complies!

So when you pray you must engage faith and thank God for giving you the desires of your heart and your, soul purpose. You need to tell him all the things you do want in a man. Be just as detailed and then believe him for it. Walk in it. Believe that you already have such a man!

Truths about Relationships and Purpose 

It is only through your relationship with people, places and events that you can exist in the universe. You are only who you are, relative to what another person is not. That is why opposites attract! Your, soul, is always looking for its counterpart to complete itself!

When human relationships fail (and they never really fail, they just did not produce the result you wanted), is because they were entered into for reasons not beneficial to their survival and, soul purpose.
The, purpose, of a relationship is to decide what part of yourself you would like to see show up not what part of another you can capture and hold.  This revelation made me look at the, purpose, of my marriage from Gods eyes.
The good news is that this marriage survived when the others failed because it had a purpose. One of them was to reveal myself to me.

Truths about Abundance and Soul Purpose 

What is an abundant mindset?
Let’s say that you are walking down the road one day and you see a homeless person begging on the street corner. You go into your wallet and notice you have $7, a $5dollar bill and 2 singles. You start to give the homeless person the $5 bill but decide instead to get him the 2 singles. Why did you change your mind about giving the $5 bill? Was it because you felt that it was too much money to part with? Did you feel that you needed it more than the homeless person?

None of these answers suggest an abundant mindset. You are operating from a spirit of lack.
The most rapid way to change a root thought or sponsoring idea is to reverse the thought-word-deed process.
Do the deed that you want to have the new thought about, then say the words that you want to have the new thought about. Do this often and you’ll train the mind to think a new way.
You are what you think you are. When the thought is a negative one, you have to find a way to break out of the cycle. So much of your present experience is based on your previous thought.

Abundance Mindset and Purpose

Let’s say You need $5000 more to close on your new home. You receive a message from God to give $2000 to a sister in the church who just lost her house in a fire. You obey because you have faith that your God is able. Your common sense tells you that you are stupid and that you will never get the money back; but you act on Gods promise. You use the words that God will provide the increase.
He does, a few days later; a check for $10,000 shows up in the mail.
I listened to a message from Joyce Meyers a few weeks back, she shared a similar story. She said that she was broke and laying in bed age her Breast cancer surgery feeling very fearful about her financial situation. Both she and her husband was in full time ministry and depended on her ability to preach for their income. She wouldn’t be able to work for some time.
Then the doorbell rang and someone brought her a check for $10,000. Someone she did not know, but who God sent. From that moment, onward she did not operate out of fear or lack, she knew that God was able. When you are on a journey that matches your, soul purpose, miracles happen.

Soul expressions

When was the last time you cried with joy, wrote poetry, made music, danced in the rain, baked a pie, painted anything, fixed something that was broken, kissed a baby, held a cat to your face, kissed your dog, swam naked, walked at sunrise, played a harmonica, talked till dawn, made love for hours on a beach or in the woods, communed with nature, searched for God, sat alone in silence, or traveled to the deepest part of your being?
When was the last time you said hello to your, soul?
Wow! After reading this I made note to say hello to my, soul, more often. I need to go skinny dipping at the beach, I need to dance in the rain and make love for hours in the woods!

So how do you awaken to your soul purpose?

Your, soul, doesn’t care what you do for a living, the, soul, only cares what you are being, while you are doing what you are doing.

The function of the, soul, is to indicate its desire, not impose it.
The function of the mind is to choose from its alternatives.
The function of the body is to act out that choice.
Your, soul, has brought you to the words you are reading or listening to right now.

How I found my, soul purpose.

One day I was reading a local newspaper. Who reads newspapers these days? I never did. But this day now only did a newspaper appear in my space; but I was guided to pick it up and flip through the pages. In one of the pages was a photograph of someone I thought I recognized so I stopped to look at it. It had her name and the title beside her name, Life coach! I had never seen that word before or heard it anywhere but I knew immediately that was what I was supposed to do.
My, soul, has been directing me all my life. It always brings me to where I need to be and the people I need to be with.

True masters are those who have chosen to make a life, rather than a living.

Life’s irony is that as soon as worldly goods and worldly success are of no concern to you, the way is open for them to flow to you.
I do this for free! Open the windows of heaven Lord!

There comes a time in the evolution of every, soul, when the chief concern is no longer the survival of the physical body, but the growth of the, spirit; no longer the attainment of worldly success but the realization of self.

The goal and, purpose, of your, soul, is to fully realize itself while in your body. To become the embodiment of all that it really is.

Listen to the author Neale Donald Walsh go into detail

You could also listen on iTunes. Please remember to subscribe.

Transform your mind iTunes link

If you like this content, please leave a review or a comment.
You can also follow me on social media for more Life coaching tips and inspirations
Follow Coach Myrna
Facebook @ Myhelps Coaching and Consulting Facebook
Instagram @ Myhelps Instagram
Twitter @ Myhelps Twitter
web: www.myrnayounghelps.com

If you are interested in being a guest on the Transform Your Mind radio TV and podcast, please contact me on the web @ www.myhelps.us or complete the Guest questionnaire and email back to me.

Additional Resources

How to Accelerate Your Soul Journey: Clear these Money Blocks

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How to Program Yourself for Positive Change

positive change

Positive change, is identifying the things that are most important in your life, and then start eliminating everything else. This is all about simplifying your life, so that you can focus on the things that matter most to you and prevents you from getting distracted.

 

Here are some tips on Positive Change from the book “Switch”

How to, change, things when, change, is hardby Chip Heath and Dan Heath

Here are the facts:

Change, is a process.

1: Positive Change, is usually a situation problem, and not a personal problem.
2: For anything to, change, someone must behave differently.
3: To, change, someone’s behavior, you must, change, someone’s situation.
4: For, positive change, to stick you must influence the person’s heart and mind.

A Story on Positive Change

Arthur was an airborne paratrooper. Jumping out of airplanes killed his knees, his back, his legs. When he got out of the army he walked with a cane and couldn’t do anything so he gained a lot of weight. He could not support his weight, so he couldn’t do traditional exercise. His health rapidly declined. The doctor at the VA clinic told him to accept his faith, that he would never walk normal again.

One day while surfing the internet, he came across Diamond Dallas Page doing yoga. He said to himself, I could do this. So He bought the DVD! He figured he could use his arm to support his weight and get a cardio workout. Arthur was 297 lbs when he started doing yoga.
When he started his yoga exercises, he kept falling down and falling down, but he kept getting back up again and again!
Every day he got better and better in 10 months he had lost over 100 lbs and could not only walk without a cane but he could run!!

Change, is usually situational. Arthur had a situational problem.

Arthur taught himself to do yoga because he decided to take control of his life. He got his heart and mind in the game and changed the situation!

Change is a process.

To lead a process requires persistence. Arthur kept getting back up and trying again to do his exercises.

When a, positive change, starts, it builds on itself.
The better Arthur got at yoga, the more he was motivated to keep going.
Positive change,  can snowball.
Change, rarely works unless it is motivated by feeling. Arthur wanted to feel better about himself so he made the hard choices.

That’s my tip of the week from coach Myrna.

How to change when change is hard.

There can be nothing harder than trying to loose 100 lbs when you can’t use your legs; but Arthur found a way and so can you.

Our guest today is coach Dan Willms and he is a, positive change, guru. This is his space.

Dan Willms is a Life & Business Coach, an MBA Professor, a facilitator for The Leadership Challenge, a writer and an International Speaker – he is also the creator of the Positive Change Workshop and facilitates his workshops in Portuguese, English & Spanish. He has facilitated more than 118 Positive Change Workshops. He loves helping people and organizations to achieve their fullest potential. He is the co-author of the book Strategic Leadership (Liderança Estratégica) and the author of the upcoming book “Positive Change – One life @ a time”.

Dan is also my partner, we do a video blog on YouTube every week called “You asked for it” where we answer questions sent in from our social media network. Like us on Facebook to become part of our community. Myrna Young Lifecoach and Dan Willms.

Using I am Affirmations for Positive change

I am affirmations, formulate, affirm, and perpetuate the stories you tell yourself. Stories about who you are, who you can be, and what you can do. I Am affirmations, are a powerful way to, program yourself, for, positive change.

If you want to make a, change, start where you are. Start with who you are. Support yourself right here, before you have all the answers. Do that and you’ll feel more supported in the process. And that can, change, well, everything.

  1. I am a living, breathing example of the kind of world I want to live in.
  2. I am a powerful force for good in the world.
  3. I am on the right path. I am moving in the right direction.
  4. I am worthy of all things wonderful.
  5. I am being guided to what’s best for me and everyone else.
  6. I am powerful enough to live in accordance with my own values, desire, and truths.
  7. I am in the exact place I need to be to get to where I want to be.
  8. I am intentionally promoting a life filled with joy.
  9. I am a firm believer in my ideas.

Show notes Positive Change

Question 1. Tell us about your journey to becoming a Life coach and an ambassador for, positive change.
Question 2: What is The, Positive Change?
Question 3: Tell me about your happiness labs, how does it work?
Question 4: : What were your findings on these labs from your sample size of 400 people?
Question 5: So, based on your labs, what would you say is the secret to happiness?
Question 6: Why do you think is there so much unhappiness in the world?

Additional Resources

How to Transform your Career with Purpose