How to Rewrite Your Life Story and Achieve Organizational Wellness

Rewrite your life story

When you rewrite your, life story, you can start living on purpose.  You can then transcend the negative stuff from your story all the things that makes you uncomfortable. When you do this as a leader, you can then show up in your organization as your best self and that contributes to, organizational wellness.

My guest today is Sam Morris, Managing Director and chief Culture Officer at Five to Flow LLC, a global collective that builds integrative, organizational wellness, solutions designed to achieve and sustain, peak performance.

Listen to the full interview Here:

Coach Myrna Life Story

I want to start off by sharing my, life story.

I decided to think about my, life story, I realized that as a youth I didn’t identify with my, life story.

My, life story, is that I was born in a very poor Third World Country, Guyana. My mother and father didn’t have much. Both my grandmother and my mom were domestic servants. During that time, I was also, sexually abused.

I never identified with that, story, because somehow God put in my heart and spirit all of the things that I was good at an early age.  I was good in school, I had a great personality, teachers liked me etc. Now that I’m a, life coach, in the personal development space, trying to motivate and inspire others;  the, story, that I tell myself now is that I was born for greater things.

The, life story, of my birth to me is just basically like Jesus, we were both born in poverty and lack in order to transform you into a spiritual teacher.

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Helping Men Rewrite their Life Story

Myrna – Sam you mentioned that you help men overcome their, life stories, traumas, and blocks to be the men the world need them to be.  I’m assuming that you have a, life story, that somehow parallels this, because we have to go through something before you can help other people do the same.

What is your, life story?

Sam – My, life story, is that I was born with my umbilical cord wrapped around my neck, so I couldn’t breathe. From birth to almost 30 years of my life, I was extremely sick.  I had severe food allergies, actually a long list of food allergies. People say that I was allergic to basically everything except water and air; but then a therapist affectionately pointed out to me that actually I was allergic to air, because I also had asthma!

There was a period in my mother’s womb when she thought she had cancer, she didn’t know she was pregnant.  So my energies and my soul and my spirit were immediately put into fighting to survive mode.

As a child and adult, self-love, was not a part of my vocabulary or thought process. I had this idea that I needed to fight for breath and also fight for love.

Overcoming Your Life Story

My, life story, became that in order to be loved, someone had to save me. People were constantly having to save me from my asthma attacks and choking, and this saving mentality got imprinted on my heart as this is what love looks like.

If I am in a relationship with a woman, friend, parents or family member, I believed that for anyone to show me that they loved me they have to somehow save me.

Later in life, I battled addiction from my early 20s into my late 30s.  Really hardcore destructive addiction.

So my, life story, of being needing to be saved was very detrimental and destructive to me and that is why I coach men on how to rewrite their, life story.

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Your Life Story and Organizational Wellness

Myrna – How does rewriting your, life story, help with organizational, wellness, and, peak performance?

Sam – Your story, is important in, organizational culture. The, culture, is where I focus all my all my energies on.  Five to Flow focuses on the, organizational culture, because a culture of, inclusivity, allows an organization to thrive.  By, inclusivity, I mean the whole, diversity and inclusion, conversation. The, inclusion, I’m talking about here is the, culture, of feeling safe, allowing your employees to be creative, to be innovative, to show up for work as their best self!

When you rewrite your, life story, around I’m living my purpose, I’m transcending the negative stuff.  I’m transcending my negative story, I’m transcending that, lifestory, that keeps me uncomfortable. I am transcending the, lifestory, that’s familiar, but not productive or growth oriented. I choose to transcend that, lifestory, and show up in my organization as my best self, that mindset contributes to organizational, wellness.

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Rewrite your Lifestory by Going Back to Your Childhood Home

Myrna – I was listening an interview on Oprah Super Soul Conversations and the author talked about going back to your childhood home and looking through the window. What were your thoughts back then as a child when you looked through the window? Did you envy your friends because they had better clothes than you? Did you want to be white and have long straight hair? Looking through your childhood window allows you to understand your mindset and rewrite your, life story.

A lot of times you have to go back to the trauma and look at it from those eyes and maybe you will see something different. Looking back you could see something someone said to you that had traumatized you for years and now you see it was nothing.  The, story, that you been telling yourself for 30 or 40 years did not happen as you saw it.

How men can be vulnerable as Leaders

Vulnerability, for a guy is like being open to show your feelings even though you have told that real men don’t do this or that.  The things that society doesn’t let you talk about because you’ll look weak. Vulnerability, is like a beach ball in the ocean. Imagine you have a beach ball and it’s fully inflated and you’re trying to push it under water, it’s gonna to always pop back up. That’s like your trauma popping back up and you keep trying to push it back down.

That leads to self-sabotage and repeated destructive patterns.  The beach ball represents, vulnerability. If you open the tab and let some of the air out of the beach ball you will be able to keep it under water.  As a leader you have to become vulnerable to prevent self-sabotage.

Myrna – I remember Tyler Perry talking about this particular subject.  He was taught that men don’t cry and that he’s gone to funerals and people have told him don’t cry, you’re a man. But in an office nobody’s crying, what’s an example of, vulnerability, in a leader that showcases organizational, wellness?

Sam – In organizational, wellness, it is the action that you take to avoid the insecurity of fear. One of those insecurities could be something about like the President implemented a strategy that proved ineffective and someone else presented a better policy.  The President could fear loosing his job and being replaced.

 

Organizational Wellness and Your Life Story

Myrna – Tell us about your organization Five to Flow, I understand your mandate is to help foster, organizational wellness.  You identified that, health and wellness, is important to organizational success.

Sam – What we do at Five to Flow is we look at five areas of, organizational wellness:

  • On our website www.fivetoflow.com we have a, wellness, wave which is a diagnostic tool that anybody take and it will spit you back a score. There’s two versions, a short version and a long form version that any anybody in the organization can take. You get a score from one to five back on how all their employees answered questions in these five areas:
  • process,
  • people,
  • culture
  • analytics and
  • technology.

Each one of these areas has 25 questions for the long form and five questions for the short one about they’re employee or the leadership team or the CEO c-level, c-suite team about their experience of those five areas of the business.

 

Conclusion

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Finally, I want to invite you guys to join my Facebook group called life coach for daily inspiration from Coaches and thought leaders from around the world.

 

Additional Resources

Are You Trapped By Your Past?

How to Find Beauty in Your Now!

5 Keys to Successful Self Leadership

Self Leadership

Success in life depends on your ability for, self leadership. You may say I am not a, leader, I am not a manager or a CEO true; but, self leadership, is more important than how many people you lead in your home or place of work.

Self leadership, is the answer to how do we develop ourselves to survive and thrive in a Volatile, Uncertain, Complex, and Ambiguous world.

Self leadership,  is the Critical Success Factor for individual and organizational success.

Here are 5 Essential Disciplines for Self Leadership 

Discipline #1 Accountability
You must learn to take full responsibility for everything on your watch. This means that the fish stinks from the head down! A great way to do this is with, self leadership, because those who follow you are watching your, leadership.

Discipline # 2 Focus
As a, Leader, you will wear many hats. Success comes from knowing where to focus your attention. Everything is important.
Acquiring the skill of discrimination allows the, leader, to discern what is most important and least important.

Discipline # 3 Organizational self leadership 

Organizational, self leadership,  is the skill through which chaos is turned into order.

Discipline # 4 Innovation
As a, leader, you will begin to consciously focus your attention and discriminate where the maximum leverage is.
You will recognize the need for continual improvement and for innovation in your processes.

Discipline # 5 Communication Skills 

Communication skills, are evident in how well you communicate your passion, vision, and mission to your employees, customers and self.

Here are 3 types of Communication Skills

The three primary means of communication are verbal, nonverbal, and visual.
  • Verbal Communication. Verbal communication depends on words to deliver meaning.
  • Nonverbal Communication. Nonverbal communication occurs when meaning or messages are sent or received without the use of words like body language.
  • Visual Communication.
Daphne Lynn Valcin is a business coach and speaker.

Daphne’s talks to us about the keys to a successful mission driven life or business.
Since 90% of startup businesses fail, Daphne believes that the quality of life and business, leadership, is at the root of success or failure.
She believes that, leadership, is about using the most effective strategies to conquer obstacles while taking consistent steps to move forward when tackling your vision, whether that vision is within the workplace, as a leader of a business or, self leadership.

Show notes:
. Daphne explains what is true, self leadership.
. What sets successful startup businesses apart from those that fail.
. How a business coach helps clients.
. What does a thriving business look like.
. What are some of the biggest mistakes companies do with their sales and marketing efforts.
. What are some of the characteristics of successful leaders.

Here are 11 strategies for effective, self leadership,  from Young Entrepreneur Council:

Leadership advice from Dale Carnegie

When managing my team, I use a tactic from Dale Carnegie: Think in terms of the other person’s wants. The goal is to align a team member’s natural talents and preferences with the company’s goals. What do they want? What motivates them? What do they like to do? Then manage them to reinforce what they want and how they can achieve those things through their work.

Additional Resources

How to Set up Your Business Structure as an Entrepreneur

How to Program Yourself for Positive Change

positive change

Positive change, is identifying the things that are most important in your life, and then start eliminating everything else. This is all about simplifying your life, so that you can focus on the things that matter most to you and prevents you from getting distracted.

 

Here are some tips on Positive Change from the book “Switch”

How to, change, things when, change, is hardby Chip Heath and Dan Heath

Here are the facts:

Change, is a process.

1: Positive Change, is usually a situation problem, and not a personal problem.
2: For anything to, change, someone must behave differently.
3: To, change, someone’s behavior, you must, change, someone’s situation.
4: For, positive change, to stick you must influence the person’s heart and mind.

A Story on Positive Change

Arthur was an airborne paratrooper. Jumping out of airplanes killed his knees, his back, his legs. When he got out of the army he walked with a cane and couldn’t do anything so he gained a lot of weight. He could not support his weight, so he couldn’t do traditional exercise. His health rapidly declined. The doctor at the VA clinic told him to accept his faith, that he would never walk normal again.

One day while surfing the internet, he came across Diamond Dallas Page doing yoga. He said to himself, I could do this. So He bought the DVD! He figured he could use his arm to support his weight and get a cardio workout. Arthur was 297 lbs when he started doing yoga.
When he started his yoga exercises, he kept falling down and falling down, but he kept getting back up again and again!
Every day he got better and better in 10 months he had lost over 100 lbs and could not only walk without a cane but he could run!!

Change, is usually situational. Arthur had a situational problem.

Arthur taught himself to do yoga because he decided to take control of his life. He got his heart and mind in the game and changed the situation!

Change is a process.

To lead a process requires persistence. Arthur kept getting back up and trying again to do his exercises.

When a, positive change, starts, it builds on itself.
The better Arthur got at yoga, the more he was motivated to keep going.
Positive change,  can snowball.
Change, rarely works unless it is motivated by feeling. Arthur wanted to feel better about himself so he made the hard choices.

That’s my tip of the week from coach Myrna.

How to change when change is hard.

There can be nothing harder than trying to loose 100 lbs when you can’t use your legs; but Arthur found a way and so can you.

Our guest today is coach Dan Willms and he is a, positive change, guru. This is his space.

Dan Willms is a Life & Business Coach, an MBA Professor, a facilitator for The Leadership Challenge, a writer and an International Speaker – he is also the creator of the Positive Change Workshop and facilitates his workshops in Portuguese, English & Spanish. He has facilitated more than 118 Positive Change Workshops. He loves helping people and organizations to achieve their fullest potential. He is the co-author of the book Strategic Leadership (Liderança Estratégica) and the author of the upcoming book “Positive Change – One life @ a time”.

Dan is also my partner, we do a video blog on YouTube every week called “You asked for it” where we answer questions sent in from our social media network. Like us on Facebook to become part of our community. Myrna Young Lifecoach and Dan Willms.

Using I am Affirmations for Positive change

I am affirmations, formulate, affirm, and perpetuate the stories you tell yourself. Stories about who you are, who you can be, and what you can do. I Am affirmations, are a powerful way to, program yourself, for, positive change.

If you want to make a, change, start where you are. Start with who you are. Support yourself right here, before you have all the answers. Do that and you’ll feel more supported in the process. And that can, change, well, everything.

  1. I am a living, breathing example of the kind of world I want to live in.
  2. I am a powerful force for good in the world.
  3. I am on the right path. I am moving in the right direction.
  4. I am worthy of all things wonderful.
  5. I am being guided to what’s best for me and everyone else.
  6. I am powerful enough to live in accordance with my own values, desire, and truths.
  7. I am in the exact place I need to be to get to where I want to be.
  8. I am intentionally promoting a life filled with joy.
  9. I am a firm believer in my ideas.

Show notes Positive Change

Question 1. Tell us about your journey to becoming a Life coach and an ambassador for, positive change.
Question 2: What is The, Positive Change?
Question 3: Tell me about your happiness labs, how does it work?
Question 4: : What were your findings on these labs from your sample size of 400 people?
Question 5: So, based on your labs, what would you say is the secret to happiness?
Question 6: Why do you think is there so much unhappiness in the world?

Additional Resources

How to Transform your Career with Purpose

How to Find your Purpose and Destiny By Your Natural Abilities

Ways to find your Purpose

 

One of the ways to  find your, purpose and destiny, is to to look inside at your natural ability. You were created with a, purpose. Find your, purpose and destiny, by looking at what you have in your hand.  There is something you can do better than anyone else on the planet. Seek and you will find it.

This week on #Mindset Transformation radio with coach Myrna, we give insights on 6 Ways to Find Your,  Purpose and Destiny. Coach Dan Willms and I  interview Keshia Marie Morris Desir, Political Activist, as she shares how she found her, purpose and destiny.

 

Introduction to Finding Your Purpose and Destiny

Purpose,  If you don’t have one, you will will never feel that spiritual fulfillment.  The bible teaches that people without a, vision, shall, perish.

I feel that having, vision, lines up with your, purpose, because God places the desires into your heart of what you were born to do.
That is the same statement that God made to Adam and Eve in the garden of Eden. He told them that if they ate from the tree of knowledge, then they will surely die. And they did!
Not a physical death; but a spiritual death. In a similar way the bible teaches that people without a, vision, shall perish, again not a physical death, but in spirit
.
You see, having a, purpose, inspires you to live and not die!

I love this quote from the great Dr. Wayne Dyer

 

“Purpose, inspires you. When you are inspired by some great, purpose, some extraordinary project; all your thoughts break their bonds, your mind transcends limitations, your consciousness expands in every direction, and you find yourself in a new and wonderful world!” Dr. Wayne Dyer

That is what happened to my daughter Keshia Marie Morris. She became inspired after reading Nelson Mandela’s book “A Long Walk to Freedom

My partner coach Dan Willms and I interviewed Keshia on our show “You Asked for it”

Here is a poem Keshia wrote and I published in my book “Out of the Snares, a story of hope and encouragement” in my chapter on, Purpose and Destiny.

Out of the Snares

Order on Amazon

What is Purpose by Keshia Marie Morris Desir

Purpose, is continually evolving
When you emit God from your, purpose,
You close doors that God clearly opened
Know that God is behind your, purpose and destiny.
Take ownership of your, purpose and destiny, for it is not yours, but the Lords.

Purpose, requires you to be diligent
Rebuke laziness in the name of God
Have tunnel vision in regards to your, purpose
Focus on your, purpose and destiny.
Walk in your, purpose
Stand in your, purpose
Don’t forget your, purpose

Neglect those things that hinder your purpose and destiny
Don’t get caught up in daily living and,
Forget what God has purposed
You will never be perfect, only the God,
Who called you to your purpose is perfect!

Purpose, makes you leave what is comfortable
Purpose will help you endure what is uncomfortable
Just because you miss a short-term goal,
It does not take you away from your purpose

The end of your purpose is always bigger than you
Purpose, will always require some suffering!
Your, purpose and destiny, may have many fingers or parts
Beware of wolves in sheep’s clothing,
Who will try to pull you away from your purpose

When you are weak, call on the Lord
Who is with you at ALL Times!
Through him all things are possible!!!
~Keshia Marie Morris

 

6 Ways to Find Your Purpose

1. To, find your purpose, look inside at your natural ability. You were created with a purpose. There is something you can do better than anyone else on the planet. Seek and you will find it.
2. Find your purpose, by paying attention to the things you like doing. The thing you would do for free. Ask yourself what would I do today if money was not a problem?
3. Find your passion. Do you want to help starving children in Africa? Do you want to stop domestic violence? Do you want to take big money out of politics? What injustice makes you mad? Don’t just talk about it, do something about it.
4. Keep learning and growing. Grow consciously. Read books. Attend seminars, hire a coach or a mentor.
5. Pray. Keep an open connection to God, so you are able to hear him through the Holy Spirit. Ask him what he wants you to do, and he will answer.
6. Reflection. Do you know what you are good at? Are you aware of your strengths? Find a quiet place every day and meditate. It is the only way to connect to source and find out who you truly are.

Understanding Purpose and Destiny

In the principles of, purpose and destiny, bear in mind that, destiny, demands fulfillment, and, purpose, expression. Both are the two-witness principle, as life is not about, purpose, alone. Both are essential for the fulfillment of what you were created for. For, purpose, without, destiny, is like having no real life at all. It’s like being on earth illegally. Therefore, we must define life from a sense of, destiny, by God’s purpose and design for our life, fulfillment, and the completion of God’s eternal purpose. We are to consider chiefly that God has a, purpose, in each of us to be fulfilled, for we are purposed and perfected with a, purpose, and destined and designed with, destiny.
We should take into consideration that our, destiny, comes from the true meaning of what the Father has eternally purposed us for? According to Ephesians 1:18, do we realize that our purpose is centered and ordained in the SON? Or are we so self-driven with our own ambition to fulfill our own expectation and desires?

Please subscribe to my podcast on iTunes.
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To contact me to be a guest on this show or for sponsorship opportunities, please send me an email at info@myhelps.us or on the web at www.myrnayounghelps.com

Additional Resources

Your Talent is Already in your Hand

 

How to Find Your Purpose in Life

How to Shine Like a Diamond with Clarity and Value

shine bright like a diamond

 

Diamonds, are created far below the earth’s surface from immense pressure and heat. Diamonds, are the most indestructible element.

How does finding your purpose compare to mining for, diamonds?

We come into this world from pressure. But we come into this world as coal in the rough says Marlene Bryan.  Similarly to the, diamond, we need, diamond cutters to shape us. Our, diamond cutters, are our parents, teachers, coaches, mentors, relationships,

They cut and shape us either to shine like a, Diamond, or stay as coal! Have you found your purpose?  My guest today on Mindset Transformation radio and podcast is Marlene M Bryan, inspirational speaker, author, business coach and President of Small Biz Evolution. Marlene is going to teach us

What is your purpose: Do you remember the day you asked:

  • “Why am I here?”
  • “Why was I born?”
  • “Why don’t I know my purpose?”
  • And the best of all: “Why me?”

It’s okay to ask the question why? Yet some people get hung up on the “why” and never move forward or take action to put what they have learned into action.

How to Shine Like a Diamond Rihanna

Shine like a diamond, shine like a star
Higher than the moon
and brighter than the sun
It’s like a dream, it’s so amazing
My heart is beating fast
I feel so fabulous
Take a chance and fly with me
It’s a Fairy world
Close your eyes and you’ll be there

Becoming a diamond by your thoughts

From the book “As a man Thinketh” by James Allen on the topic “Thoughts and Purpose”

Until thought is linked with purpose, there is no intelligent accomplishment.
Those who have no central purpose in life, fall an easy prey to petty worries, fears, troubles, and self-pitying; all which lead to failure, unhappiness, and loss.

For weakness cannot persist in a power-evolving universe.

A man should conceive of a legitimate purpose in his heart, and set out to accomplish it by shining like a, diamond.  He should make this purpose the centralizing point of his thoughts. He should make this purpose his supreme duty, and devote himself to its attainment, not allowing his thoughts to wander away into ephemeral fancies, longings, and imaginings.

Purpose to Become a Diamond

Even if you fail again and again to accomplish your purpose (and you must until weakness is overcome), the strength of character gained will be the measure of your true success, and this will form a new starting point for future power and triumph.

Those who are not prepared for the apprehension of a great purpose, should fix their thoughts upon the faultless performance of their duty, no matter how insignificant their task may appear.

The weakest soul, knowing its own weakness, and believing this truth- that strength can only be developed by effort and practice- will, thus believing at once begin to exert itself adding effort to effort, patience to patience, strength to strength will at last grow divinely strong.

Only by searching and mining are, gold and diamonds, obtained, and man can find every truth connected with his being, if he will dig deep into the mines of his soul!

Diamonds are created far below the earth’s surface from immense pressure and heat.
Diamonds are the most indestructible element.
How does finding your purpose compare to, mining for diamonds?
We come into this world from pressure. But we come into this world as coal in the rough says Marlene Bryan.
Similarly to the, diamond, we need, diamond cutters, to shape us. Our diamond cutters are our parents, teachers, coaches, mentors, relationships,
They cut and shape us either to shine like a Diamond or stay as coal!

How do you find your purpose with the 4 C’s

Your purpose can come from a place of pain or from something you love.
If you can’t figure it out, get the help of your, diamond cutters!
Ask them what you do well or what your talents are.
Pain is an energy much like anger that moves us out of our comfort zone into our purpose.

What are the 4 C’s of a, diamond, and how does becoming a Diamond Help us Find our Purpose?

  • CUT: The cut of the diamond determines its value. The diamond cutters in our life determine our brilliance.
  • COLOR: Color in a diamond is a flaw; but now the pink and yellow diamonds are more desirable than colorless diamonds.
    Similarly, what we consider flawed about ourselves could be our most valuable quality.
  • CLARITY: The transparency of the diamond also determines its value.
    We must also be transparent. You must know who you are and stay true to your values.
  • CARAT: The bigger the carat, the more the presumed value but a smaller diamond with all the above attributes could be more valuable.
    We should help other become greater or bigger by giving them a hand up.

Is your purpose to become a Life coach?

Then subscribe, rate and review this podcast and I will send you my FREE EBook

How to Become a Life Coach

To receive send me an email to info@myhelps.us with the subject line “Podcast review” and I will send to you.

Additional Resources 

https://blog.myhelps.us/how-to-awaken-to-your-souls-purpose/

How to Find Beauty in Your Now!

Finding Beauty in your now

Finding, beauty, in your Now is the point of all power that unlocks healing, growth, strength, peace, desires, success, and happiness.

This week I interview Aireka Harvell, aspiring motivational speaker who focuses on transforming the minds and lives of women with her blog “Be That Woman.” She is also the Founder of Nodat Place Advertising LLC. where she encourages and promotes female entrepreneurship and offers daily motivation and support through her social media platforms.

Introduction  “How to find Beauty in your Now”

Aireka has a powerful story of overhearing a mother telling her son that she was, ugly, and seeing her mom treat he brother better because he was handsome when  she was just 9 years old. That tag stayed with her throughout her life and gave birth to low self esteem, becoming a people pleaser and allowing her husband to mentally and physically abuse her. Aireka has lived in darkness of thinking she was, ugly, for most of her life, until one day she heard the voice of God telling her to Help other women “Be That Woman” he made them to be.

Today she has a huge following on Instagram and on her blog and offers Hope and Encouragement with her daily posts.

Listen to find out How to control your mind and bring it under subjection when thoughts of fear and hopelessness threaten to stomp out your joy.

Learn that there is opportunity to learn and grow from every situation.

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What is Beauty in the eyes of God

The tip of the week from Coach Myrna is an except from the book The University of Success by Og Mandino

A Conversation with our manufacturer (God)
God: Tell me “what is your purpose down there on earth”

Man: Well you know “I want to work hard and not hurt anyone, and I want to get along with folks and stay out of trouble”
God: “But what about your talents”

Man: Well what talents I have and there are not much, I take good care of. I kind of pace myself, you know.
No, No,No God shouted, your answers are all wrong. Don’t you remember the story of the talents?

Man: Yes I think so … You gave each of three men a different set of talents. To one man, you gave five talents. To another man, you gave two talents. And to the third, you gave but one talent.

“That’s right says God: and some years later I checked up on each of these three men. I was pleased to find that the man with five talents had multiplied his talents by working hard, and applying each one. The man whom I gave two talents had also labored hard and multiplied them. But when I checked with the man I had only given one talent, I became very angry. For that man had buried his talent in the name of protecting it. To which I cursed him saying “thou wicked and slothful servant” how dare you not use the gifts and, beauty, I gave you. You Knew that I reap where I have not sown and gather where I scattered no seed.
Do you not get the point of this parable?

Man: Yes I think so. I am to use the talents and, beauty, you gave me and multiply them to help others.

God: Let me ask you another question
“Who is in charge of your life?”

Man: I am responsible for my life – but with a few exceptions. I mean sometimes you just don’t get the breaks, you know. Sometimes things just don’t go my way, but that is the way the ball bounces or the way the cookie crumbles”

God jumped to his feet “No, No, No, he shouted. You were created in my image of, beauty. “When will you learn, you are totally responsible for your life, no exceptions. You are totally responsible for the results you obtain. Not your mother, not your father, not your boss. It’s not the breaks, that control your life, it’s you. Don’t ever say that is the way the ball bounces, that it is the way the cookie crumbles. You must bounce your own ball!

Man: Okay, okay I think I see. The fact is that I have been put on earth to succeed, I have an obligation, a responsibility, to use my abilities to the fullest. I must control my life, for I wasn’t designed to be led. I prefer excellence to mediocrity. I won’t prevent my own success, for all success requires is that I am here, and that I use my talents to the world and not wait for the world to come to me. And I will act now, no matter how convenient waiting may seem, no matter how imperfect might be the results I obtain.
Tears welled up in God’s eyes, a smile creased his face.

God: “Thou wonderful and faithful servant, take all the love and energy and talent that you have and share it. Share it with all you meet, until it seems you have no more to give, there will always be more and more in reserve. Your potential extends beyond your wildest imaginings. The only limitations you will ever face will be those you place on yourself”

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How to find Beauty in everyday moments

Johanna Sevier Robb says in her blog post on “How to find the Beauty in Everyday Present Moments”:

There is so much, beauty, in the world—and because this crazy, gorgeous life is so fleeting, I want to focus on the, beauty.

No, I won’t turn my eyes away from the horrors of the world. But I also won’t become so consumed by these horrors that I no longer notice the wind dancing on the water. Or the tender grasp of my lover. Or the plant on the windowsill stretching toward the sunlight.

I’m not trying to downplay the crap. But just to understand the, beauty standards, of men. I don’t want to crumple into a small, powerless mess each and every time I read the news.

Negativity sells. Sensationalism sells. But this is not the reality of, beauty. So I ask, what is beauty?

Sure, man’s, beauty standards, is real. But generosity, kindness, humility and love is also real. And I still believe in humanity. Only a tiny bit of the present world can be summed up by violence and acts of terror. Only a tiny bit of human history can be summed up by wars and acts of cruelty.

How to Find your Beauty even if the world thinks you are ugly

Despite his physical appearance, the elephant man  and his mother were close.  His mother did not think he was, ugly. A former housemaid, she was also handicapped and had three additional children, two of whom died at a young age. She herself passed away in 1873 of pneumonia. Her death devastated young Joseph. Not only did he lose his closest friend, but his father, now working as a haberdasher, soon married the strict widow Emma Wood Antill who had two children of her own and demanded young Merrick, elephant man,  leave school and earn his living. Amazingly, despite his growing abnormalities, he found employment at a cigar shop, but his right hand soon became too large to manage the delicate work of rolling cigars. In order to earn his keep, his father got Joseph a hawker’s license to sell gloves door to door. But his, ugly,  appearance frightened prospective customers and his sales were dismal. Joseph Senior would often beat his son if he came home empty-handed and the stepmother would deny him full meals unless he had earned enough to pay for them. As a result, he ran away — or rather walked away — from home more than once.

~

How to Become a Life Coach

If you liked this content remember to share, subscribe to my iTunes podcast and write a review. Once you do, send me an email to info@myhelps.us with the subject line “Podcast review” and I will send you one of two gifts. My eBook “How to become a Life Coach” or a “Mindset Shift Focus Wheel” a workbook to change from a Fixed Mindset to a Growth Mindset.

Additional Resources

Life Coaching part 1: Who am I

 

How to Find Your Purpose in Life

You can, find your purpose, in life by paying attention to your passions. Your master, purpose in life, is to spread happiness. You will always see the optimism in life no matter how dark it may seem.

Are you lifted by your purpose? This week on Mindset Transformation Radio and Podcast, I interview Ms Arifah Yusuf who is not only lifted by her, purpose, but founded a company called Lifted By Purpose where she helps youths in Toronto, Canada to become lifted by their purpose.

As Arifah was working with the youth she noticed their tattoos and decided to have a spin off company called Tattoo Stories. She used the tattoos stories to help her clients share their stories through the images they permanently put on their bodies.

How to Find Your Purpose in Life

How we perceive images can help us, find your purpose.

How you react to an image can tell you a lot about you, including your, life’s purpose.
Art speaks to us because it’s about us. It’s about our collective and individual journeys in this wondrous, immeasurable universe.

As Chuck Klosterman said, “Art and love are the same thing: It’s the process of seeing yourself in things that are not you.”  Images stir up numerous emotions in the beholder: awe, shock, sorrow, rage, and even repulsion. You may feel an intense, nameable emotion within seconds of seeing an image, or it could take several minutes of staring at the image before you can decide what it means to you. And as art is as diverse as the people who create and perceive it, the responses to it naturally vary. Art can play a crucial role in self-discovery and an individual’s, purpose in life.

Image test to find your purpose

Click the link below to take your image, purpose, test and see what it shows is your, purpose.

https://themindsjournal.com/this-image-test-will-reveal-your-true-purpose-in-life/

I took this test and my test revealed that my purpose was to spread Happiness. So True.

“Your master, purpose in life, is to spread happiness. You will always see the optimism in life no matter how dark it may seem. You can distinguish the lightness from the darkness and this is what takes you to another level. With happiness, everything can be cured and your purpose is to spread this feeling in times most needed.”

Bio

Arifah Yusuf, is a registered social worker from Ryerson University. She has 12 years experience engaging and developing programs for youth, facilitating workshops and providing counseling services. Ms. Yusuf was nominated and awarded the Community Health Champion Award for her dedication working with youth. In 2015 she received the leadership award from Canadian Alliance of Black Educators and in 2016, the Ontario Leading Women in Community Award.

She is trained and certified by the National Organization for Victims Assistance, Traumatology institute, and is a Mental Health First Aid Instructor. In her role at Lifted By purpose, she is the Founder and Executive Director.

 

How did you find your purpose?

Can you tell us your journey as a social worker and how it transitioned into founding Lifted by Purpose?
I grew up a a rough neighborhood in Toronto. As a youth, I had a family member who died from Homicide and that affected me profoundly; but I did not have an outlet to grieve so I became very depressed. As I got older, I wanted to become a social worker so I can help other youths who experienced trauma to have a space to talk and get help. This is how I found my, purpose.

Today “Lifted by purpose” helps youths, find their purpose, and provides services to help the youth with coping skills and prepare for a purposeful future.

Using tattoo stories to find the meaning of life

You have an offspring from Lifted by purpose called Tattoo stories. Can you tell our audience what that is about and how tattoo helps youths find their, purpose.

During counselling I started asking my clients to tell me their stories about the permanent tattoos on their bodies. I found that these tattoos were connected to their, purpose in life. Most life events are marked with a tattoo.

Services offered to help find your purpose

What are some projects and services provided by Lifted by purpose.
At Lifted by Purpose we focus on the arts.
Some of our services are:

  • Music stress program 10 to 20 weeks
  • Playlist therapy that identifies tracks that speak to grief or loss
  • How to have healthy Relationships
  • How to identify triggers that move them into making bad choices
  • Identify coping skills
  • Tattoo stories and what they mean

I see from the information you provided me for the interview that your target audience is young people between the ages of 16 to 29 years who are at risk or already in the justice system. How does your program help these young people, find your purpose.

Our program helps our youth to harness their story

  • Understand how to utilize their stories to understand themselves.
  • Reflect on how their stories has influenced their choices in life
  • How to flip a negative story into something positive
  • Action steps. Are they ready to make a change
  • How does their story affect their purpose and lift them up.

How does Tattoo stories tie into meaning of life

Tattoo stories Helps the youth understand their, purpose and have a voice that can help others on their journey.

 

Order Here

Additional Resources

https://blog.myhelps.us/6-ways-to-find-your-purpose/

 

 

How to Assemble Your Power Team Like WandaVision

power team wandavision

Valeri Bocage lost everything in hurricane Katrina and used her pain to create her company Powerful Women International. She believes that the greater your pain the greater things that are birthed from this pain. In the, WandaVision,  prequel, Vision, was, well, very dead. … Wanda eventually managed to destroy the Mind Stone – and, Vision, – but Thanos turned back time and plucked it out anyway. Both outcomes killed, Vision.

Valerie says  that whenever you focus on what you have lost, you can never move forward. Her purpose was to make a difference.
She says to figure out who your audience is. Who are you supposed to make a difference to?

My tip of the week is:

How to Create Positive Core Beliefs

Our guest today shared her story of losing everything in hurricane Katrina and bouncing back to become the CEO of Powerful Women International. To do that she had to have positive self-worth and positive, core beliefs. Beliefs are the truths people hold on to that guide our life. The power of belief can trap you, as in the belief that you deserve only a limited amount of happiness. Or belief can free you, as in the belief that you are safe and protected in the cosmic plan.

When you open your awareness to your strongest, core beliefs, which are known as, core beliefs, two things happen. First, you find out who you are and why you behave in the ways you do. Second, new energies become available when you pursue the, core beliefs, that are life-supporting, fulfilling, and spiritually transforming.

A powerful, core belief, is pure and direct. It gives you a clear sense of who you are. It isn’t confused, conflicted, or compromised. Let’s take steps to make this the kind of, core belief, you are activating. Step one is to bring your, core beliefs, into awareness. The four, core beliefs,  you want to activate are:

  • I am loving and lovable.
  • I am worthy.
  • I am safe and trusting.
  • I am fulfilled and whole.

You already have existing, core beliefs, in these four areas of love, self-worth, security, and fulfillment. Your beliefs can’t be changed simply by throwing out an old one and adopting a new one like changing your wardrobe. The change must come at the level of self-awareness. At the core of your being, where your true self resides, the truth about you is clear and unequivocal: You deserve unconditional love; you are of unique worth in the universe; you can trust Nature to protect and uphold you; and your fulfillment comes from being whole.

To overhaul your beliefs means that you get closer and closer to your core beliefs, these four inner truths, which are absolute. Right now, there’s a gap between them and what you experience. For most people, the positive and negative side of their core beliefs depend on how good or bad their experiences have been in the past. If you have been deeply hurt in love, for example, it is hard to adopt the core belief that you deserve infinite love.

Transform your Mind TuneIn Radio
TuneIn Radio

A Self-Awareness Exercise to Create Your Core Beliefs

Hawkeye on , WandaVision, is self aware that he is the weakest link.  Although he is an extremely skilled marksman, Clint Barton is often considered to be the weakest Avenger seeing as he’s just a regular guy with a bow and arrow.  Reliving experiences from the past only keeps you stuck in the past. Your core beliefs are activated in the now, every day. They can only be changed in the now! Here’s how:

Look upon what’s happening now as a reflection of your,  core beliefs.  If the reflection is negative, pause and ask yourself why it fits the storyline your beliefs create. If you experience any kind of abusive treatment, for example, this reflects a victimhood story supported by a core belief that keeps you in the story. If you experience unexpected kindness, on the other hand, this reflects a storyline that includes compassion and reflects a core belief in how much you deserve love.

A, core belief, that God has plans to prosper you, will take you through any setback.

• Valeri Bocage started Powerful Women International in 2006 after moving to San Francisco, a move that was prompted by the loss of everything during Hurricane Katrina in New Orleans. Valeri lost everything except her indomitable spirit to help others. Initially, Powerful Women International was formed to help women live their dreams and to begin to support each other worldwide to fulfill their utmost dreams and expand themselves as leaders worldwide.

Transform your Mind Stitcher
Transform your Mind Stitcher

How did Valerie build and assemble her Power teams?

Power Team, is  a team consisting of people who possess all the strengths needed to achieve your mission. They are an extension of you not a mirror. 

You’ve thought about your, power team,  and created an ideal customer profile based on that aspiration. The same thing should be done as you prepare to build your, power team, members.

As you make a list of your, power team,  you’ll need an:

  • accountant,
  • marketer,
  • social media manager,
  • content writer,
  • public relations manager,
  • customer service representatives

This is the time to aim high; to refuse to settle for less-than-ideal.

With her,  Power Team,  by her side, Valerie was able to take her brand to more people, with greater positive impact. Too many brand builders work to simply fill positions, when they should be working to hire those people who will further the reach and value of their brands. Who will you hire next? What challenges are you experiencing whilst hiring? What difference your, Power Team, made.

Transform Your Mind iHeart Radio
iHeart Radio

 

Additional Resources

All-girl engineer team invents solar-powered tent for the homeless

Daniela Orozcoshe recalls how many homeless people she saw on her way to school when she was a high school freshman.

 

How do You Define Success?

How to Create Positive Core Beliefs

7 Ways to Live a More Meaningful Life

How to life a meaningful life

Whenever we are faced with our mortality, we look back and see if we have lived a, meaningful life. At the age of thirty-six, on the verge of completing a decade’s worth of training as a neurosurgeon, Paul Kalanithi was diagnosed with stage IV lung cancer and he reflected on the, meaning of life. One day he was a doctor treating the dying, and the next he was a patient struggling to understand the, meaning of life. And just like that, the future he and his wife had imagined evaporated. When Breath Becomes Air, chronicles Kalanithi’s transformation from a naïve medical student “possessed,” as he wrote, by the question of what, given that all organisms die, makes a virtuous and, meaningful life, into a neurosurgeon at Stanford working in the brain, the most critical place for human identity, and finally into a patient and new father confronting his own mortality and, life.

Washington Post: When Breath Becomes Air’: Young doctor’s last words of wisdom, hope

What is the, meaning of life? What makes life  worth living in the face of death? What do you do when the future, no longer a ladder toward your goals in life, flattens out into a perpetual present? What does it mean to have a child, to nurture a new life as another fades away? These are some of the questions Kalanithi wrestles with in this profoundly moving, exquisitely observed memoir.

Today on the Mindset Transformation radio show and podcast, I would like to take you on a journey into living!

How to live before you die

 7 Ways to live a virtuous and, meaningful life.

Psychologists says that in order to live a virtuous and, meaningful life, you should have balance in these 7 areas:

1. You should have A fulfilling career – i.e. You are doing what you love.
2. You should and must have a relationship with a higher power, God.
3. You must be fruitful and multiply.
4. You should offer Service to your community.
5. You must have effective time management and stress reduction.
6. You must get quality sleep, adequate exercise and proper nutrition.
7. You should spend quality time with loved one’s friends and family.

A Fulfilling career makes,  life,  meaningful 

Most people don’t do what they love, they work to live; so they live to work!
I saw a viral picture a few weeks back on Instagram that made me chuckle
It was a picture of a man crying with the caption:

Podbean

So how do you find your passion, work in your passion or work on your passion?

You have to Listen to your soul.

If you are dreading going to work, hate it all the time you are there, and you are not serving or making a difference in the lives of others, then quit. Working a job you hate does not allow for a, meaningful life.
Step out on faith.
Faith, now faith is the assurance of things hoped for and the conviction of things not seen.
Believe that God will fund your purpose, and if it is his will.

On the road to Damascus, Saul encountered Christ in a memorable experience that left him temporally blind. Immediately he started to undergo a major transformation of his whole life and character, including a total reorientation of his world view. Following this he was commissioned into service as an apostle to the Gentiles. Paul’s story highlights the 3 dynamics of a meaningful life.
The relational the, transformational, and the vocational. We must not choose one and neglect the others.

The relational experiences in a, meaningful life, results in openness to others, healing progress towards Christlikeness and participation in God’s purposes in the world.

The, Transformational, concerns how we transform after being touched by God and the Holy Spirit. Just as all Saul’s beliefs, mindset and values were altered, so can yours. This show’s mission is the offer you advice on how to do that.

The vocational is what we are talking about and it is how God works through us. I am doing God’s work.
He has given me the purpose of speaking life into you!

So, choose your vocation wisely and work as unto the Lord.

Know this for sure, that the quickest and most direct path to sickness and death is to linger in stressful situations. All diseases can be traced back to inflammation. Inflammation is brought on by stress and negative emotions.

Find your purpose and step out on faith.

As a coach, I can Help you design a plan to get there quicker.

A relationship with a higher power give you a, meaningful  life 

We are dual beings having both a physical and a nonphysical experience.

The most important barometer to living a meaningful and virtuous life is how your connect with source and if you understand why your soul chose this time to manifest into a physical being. i.e Understand what you are here to do!
When you meditate, you open communication with source energy and infinite intelligence.

This is the gateway, this is the path a, meaningful life.

When you are in communication with source, you get fed instructions to live a meaningful and virtuous life.
It is a 2 way communication; you ask and you receive.

So don’t stay in that job that is killing you, ask your source to direct you to the right job.
Listen for the instructions on how to do it the supernatural way, and not by your own limited powers.
I am telling you from personal experience, this works.
I receive instructions every morning either in bed before I rise, during meditation or sometimes later in the day. I act on my inspirations and they always produce fruit. And because I act on them,

I keep receiving more. If you don’t act on your gut instinct, your gut instincts will stop coming.
The bible teaches us not to do anything in your own strength! With God all things are possible.
Everything begins with our relationship with God and the improved quality of other relationships that develop out of this. In the intimacy of such a personal relationship, something of God’s own character gradually spills over into ours; it stimulates our, transformation. From our new awareness and knowing that God loves us, comes an increased confidence and boldness to face life’s challenges and opportunities. It motivates and empowers us to take more risks. It becomes the platform for a whole new approach to courageous and virtuous living.

God said “Be fruitful and multiply, and repopulate the earth”

Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord, the fruit of the womb a reward”
Can you truly have lived a, meaningful, and virtuous life if you have not multiplied yourself?
In the bible age, women who were barren were believed to be cursed.
In today’s age bearing a child is still considered one of the most rewarding and sought after experiences in life.
God hardwired unconditional love to the mother. A love that transforms hearts, an energy that is quantum, that means it can be felt over great distances just by thinking of your child.
I can tell you that the birth of my 2 children were the most, meaningful, things I did in my life. They are my reward, a gift that keeps on giving and giving.

The second question Dr Kalanitht asked as he faced his morality was:

“How do you nurture your child to live life, as yours fades away”

You see Dr Kalanitht and his wife decided to accept God’s plan for them to be fruitful and multiply.
They decided to leave a legacy behind, so they had a baby together.
The thought of leaving behind a child only increased the pain for Dr. Kalanitht.
We would all agree that leaving behind loved ones is the most painful part of death.

That is why we must live each day like it is your last.

You must impart all the love, knowledge and wisdom into your children when you are alive, so as they grow older, they would not depart from it and you will live on in their thoughts and hearts.

Be of Service to your community is another way to live a, meaningful life 

Your Success is in direct proportion to your service.
We must put the fuel in before we get heat.
No man can get rich by himself, unless he enriches the lives of others.
To lead you must first serve.
Your purpose in life will always include service to others.

Serving at the Ronald McDonald House

There’s a special connection that comes with preparing meals for others too heartbroken to cook for themselves. Making those dinners with a group of volunteers brings an intimacy and humility that cannot be matched. And one of the best spots I know to do that is at the Ronald McDonald House in Falls Church, Va., a place that offers comfort, refuge and care for families whose children are battling life-threatening illnesses.

Jarun Brown and Beverly Johnson prepare a meal at the Ronald McDonald House in Falls Church, Va.
Jarun Brown, 64, chops broccoli as we create a salad for 14 family members staying at the House. A social worker and former McDonald’s executive, she once “danced for a minute” with the Alvin Ailey Dance Company. Her previous corporate position earned her a seat on the Ronald McDonald House Charities (RMHC) board in Norfolk, Va., and she began volunteering with the Falls Church Ronald McDonald House six years ago.

“We do whatever is needed,” Brown says of the volunteers’ work. That could mean cooking a meal, cleaning the house, rotating refrigerated food or writing thank-you notes. Although volunteers and families don’t often stay in touch after leaving the House, Brown has kept in contact with a few families over the years. “It’s great to hear how our families are doing, and learn about the children’s recovery process,” she says. It makes their lives, meaningful.

Erin Petri, the evening manager, joins us. I give her an onion to chop and hope she doesn’t cry. A few minutes later another volunteer, Beverly Johnson, comes in. Volunteering with RMHC was on her bucket list after suffering the loss of a child years ago. A place like the Ronald McDonald House would have been helpful to her.
“I can relate [to what the families are experiencing] and that’s what makes it so special and so rewarding to me,” she says as she chops apples.
The families begin to enter the dining room. Several of them are drawn to the aroma of pineapple chicken simmering on the stovetop. We finish the broccoli salad and set it on the counter, next to the stove with the chicken and rice. It smells delicious and comforting, and we are happy that we have given these families what may be the only positive event for them that day.
Johnson offers to clean up, and I happily accept. “It is good therapy for me,” she says of her Ronald McDonald House work. “I think I’ve found my niche.”

Effective Time Management gives life, meaning. 

The key to a stress-free life is effective time management.
If you are always working in red zone of deadline you will experience burnout.
Effective time management is scheduling your day to work on top priority tasks before you work on C or D priority tasks.
When you do this, you will eliminate stress.
Effective time management also means that you plan your days to include the things that give life meaning. Walking in nature, exercise, reading, sitting quietly to reflect or meditate, spending quality time with loved ones, and proper rest.

Getting quality sleep, good nutrition, and exercise

Physical exercise releases endorphins, improves sleep, prevents diseases, releases stress, prevents dementia, prolongs life….
I could go on and on.
Everybody knows that exercise is good for your body, mind, and soul; yet few do it.

Since our topic today is When breathe becomes air: How to live a virtuous and, meaningful life.
I think everybody reading this would want to live a quality life. One that includes being healthy and independent.
The most effective way to ensure this is to get regular exercise, adequate nutrition and proper rest
In his book The Eat to Live Plan” John Fuhrman MD says, our body’s are designed for wellness. Give it the right biochemical environment for healing and it becomes a miraculous self-healing machine. When you eat mostly high-nutrient foods, the body ages slower and is armed to prevent and reverse many common illnesses, like diabetes.

The exercise prescription and a, meaningful life

Exercise is extremely important. Almost everyone can do something, even those who cannot walk can do arm, abdominal, and back exercises with light weights or use an arm cycle. Exercise will facilitate your weight loss and make you healthier. Vigorous exercise has a powerful effect on promoting longevity.

Spending quality time with loved ones gives, life, meaning 

In human affairs, there are efforts, and there are results.
The strength of the effort is the measure of the result. We know this to be a fact.
If you studied for your test, you will get a better grade.
If you make more sales calls, you will get more sales; if you spend quality time with your spouse, you will have a better marriage, if you spend quality time with your kids, they wouldn’t act out looking for attention.

Transform your Mind Stitcher
Transform your Mind Stitcher

Invest in your relationships.
Joel Osteen says that if you want your relationships to thrive, you must invest in them.
Be a giver rather than a taker. Strive to make deposits into the lives of your loved ones and other peoples lives. Encourage them, build them up, and help them to feel better about themselves.
One of the best advice I received on my wedding day, was to look at my marriage as a bank account. Don’t make withdrawals if I made no deposits”

Joel Osteen says the same thing.
Look at your relationships as an “emotional bank account” Every time you interact with loved ones or friends, you are either making a deposit or a withdrawal from your account.
You make deposits in the lives of your loved ones by giving them a hug and a kiss, telling them how much you love them, spending quality time with them, listening to them when they speak or being involved in the things they love like playing the piano, sports, painting etc.
We make withdrawals when we don’t take time for people, we don’t keep our commitments, when we don’t express appreciation. When we make more withdrawals than deposits our account becomes overdrawn.

The bible says in Ecclesiastes 5:3

The dream comes through much effort and the voice of a fool through many words.

Having a, meaningful, and virtuous life comes through much effort. You can’t just have the knowledge and don’t put it into action, you can’t just talk about wanting to live a, meaningful life, and not put the effort in.

Having a fulfilling career takes effort. You must learn the skills and then work hard to move up through the corporate ladder or building your own business.

Having a relationship with God takes the effort to find time to meditate and listen for instructions.

Being a good parent takes a lot of effort. Someone else is depending on you.

Being of service to your community takes supreme effort. Who has the time you ask? But something happens when you help the less fortunate. When you work at the soup kitchen and feed the hungry; you find your humanity. All your pedilly problems seems insignificant.

It takes effort to manage your time effectively, and not become reactionary.

It takes effort to make sure you are eating a balanced diet and taking supplements. It takes effort to get up early to exercise or do it after a long day. But if you want to live a long and meaningful life, you will do it.

If you found this content inspirational, be sure to share with your friends.
Please subscribe to my iTunes podcast “Transform your mind with coach Myrna”
Transform your mind podcast link

If you would like to be a guest on the Mindset Transformation radio show and podcast or a sponsor a show, email Coach Myrna at info@myhelps.us

Additional Resources

No Fear : How to Live with Courage

 

Life Coaching part 1: Who am I

In order to make permanent changes in your life, the first question you must ask is, who am I?  This question allows you to understand yourself and why you came into this body.

As a, Life coach, I want to share with you a , life coaching session, Life Coaching Part 1: Who am I,  from my 6-week Life coaching workshop.

We can never become who we were meant to be unless we can first recognize who we are by asking the question, who am I.

To know thyself is to grow thyself

So let’s dive right in.

First a little about, who I am.

I am a certified, Life coach, specializing in Mindset and consciousness. In 2012 I wrote my first book “Becoming conscious, my awakening” because I started to understand, who I am. In this episode I will take you through the process of discovering Who you are, be asking the question, who am I.

If you like this content please share with your friends and remember to rate, review and subscribe to the podcast. Thank you

Life coach Myrna Young, who am I
Life coach Myrna Young, who am I

Who am I, What are my deepest and truest values?

Your deepest values are the ones no one can move you off of. Your deepest values are the ones that if not met, hurt the most. Your truest values are the ones that make you cry.

Your deepest value could be that you would never hit your child. You were abused as a child and you vowed never to hit your child; but you get married and your spouse believes in spanking. He or she believes the bible that says spare the rod and spoil the child. So, your spouse spanks your child. It hurts you so much that you are forced to file for a divorce. Irreconcilable Differences!

Another example to find out, who am I, could be that you were brought up that nice girls do not have sex before marriage. It is a deal breaker in all your relationships. Your dates either leave you or they cheat on you; but you can’t bring yourself to have premarital sex. It is one of your deepest and truest values. As a result, you are single and unmarried at 40 years old.

Your deepest values are found by asking the question, who am I. It could be about how you feel about charity. I never pass someone on the street begging. I feel it is a blessing to have a dollar to give. My husband on the other hand, feels that everybody can find a job, and only the worthless people stand at the corner and beg. That is his deepest value and this is mine.

Your deepest value could take the form of image and by asking, who am I. You may be willing to endure a passionless marriage if it gives you status in your community. There are lots of big houses with white picket fences that house very unhappy families.

One of my deepest values was on domestic abuse. My ex-husband slapped me and I divorced him. Simple as that! My value took the form that I would never become a battered woman. I didn’t have to ask the question, who am I.  I knew that if he hit me once he would hit me again. My daughter was 5 years old at the time. Most women would have a value in giving their children a family with a mom and dad. But mine was more self-centered. Nobody should judge your deepest values. They are yours. You must know them and accept them. They make you who you are. A unique being!

Who am I, do I believe in One True Love?

Your truest value could be found by also asking, who am I. How do you love and receive love?
Do you believe that you could only love one person and there is only one true love for you? What happens if you get a divorce or your spouse dies? Does that mean that love is over for you?
How do you receive love?

I heard a story once about a woman who would ask her husband every day if he loved her. He would say of course I love you honey. Yet she did not believe him and would ask him again the next day. She felt love by how much attention she received from her husband. As her insecurities grew she required more and more attention. The marriage ended in divorce.

Your deepest value could be on why you feel you are on this earth, in this body. Do you take the time to consider your purpose and your legacy?

Who am I, What are my preferences and priorities?

Who am I, What kind of house would I like to live in.
What country would I like to live in if I had a choice. Do I prefer beach front, mountain view or lots of trees and greenery? Visualize yourself sitting on the porch of this house.

Who am I, how do I like my men? Do I like them tall, dark and handsome? or am I looking for the spiritual connection and don’t care what form the package takes?

What kinds of music do I like? What kinds of music transports me to a good place?

What are my preferences during sex? Do I like it with the lights on or off?

What forms of entertainment do I prefer? Do I like the movies, going dancing or staying at home with a good book?

If I didn’t have to work, what would I do?

Who are my priorities in Life? Do my children come first, my spouse or God?
Do I make healthy eating and exercise a priority or do I never have time to get to it?

Who am I, What genuinely makes me happy?

I love walking in the park and listening to podcasts and books about successful people in life.

I love listening to the rain and the sounds of the ocean.

Ask yourself , who am I, and put your list of preferences on paper.

Soundcloud Transform your mind podcast
Transform your Mind Soundcloud podcast

Who am I, What are my subconscious patterns and ways of reacting?

How do I react when I feel rejected?

  • Do I seek revenge?
  • Do I get even or do I eat a pint of ice-cream?
    How do I look at the world?
  • Do I see abundance or do I see scarcity?
  • Do you feel jealous when your friends get a promotion or find love?
  • Are you glad for them or do you secretly hope they fail? No judgment just understanding.

 

Who am I, If you are happy for your friends, you are attracting abundance into your life. If you are jealous, you are saying that there is not enough to go around and you feel they have taken your share. So, you have a spirit of lack and that will not bring you abundance.

Who am I, What are your triggers?

Ask yourself? When do I pick up the phone and call my old lovers?
Is my trigger when I can’t get my lover on the phone and I think he or she is cheating on me?

I am one of those people who don’t bear malice. That means that I get angry for a few days and then I forgive. Unless it is the third time. I have a 3-strike rule!

Transform Your Mind iHeart Radio
iHeart Radio
Who am I, What do you Fear

As a Life coach, I ask my clients, what do they fear?  

This is an important workshop. Fears are bottom feeders. Fears keep you at the tail and not the head of the table. If you have fears, you must face them and replace them.
Fear can also keep you bound in a bad or abusive relationship.

Here are some common fears:

  • Do you fear getting old?
  • Do you fear being alone?
  • Do you fear being homeless?
  • Do you fear getting fat?
  • Do you fear your spouse would leave you?
  • Do you fear losing your job?
  • Do you fear death?

Fear is an energy. Thoughts are the most powerful energy force in the universe.
Thoughts can be either positive or negative.
Heading up the rear of negative thoughts is fear.
It is the bottom feeder or all the emotions.
When you live in fear, you feel bad all the time.
If you allow fear to linger in your body and in your mind. It will not only attract the thing you fear the most into your experience; but it will also bring disease to your body.
All diseases can be traced back to negative thoughts and emotions.
Negative thoughts transform your body into an acidic state.
In fear mode your body is activated in the fight or flight mode.
Your body tenses, your breathing is shallow, your heart palpitates, your blood pressure is elevated, your hands and body sweat.
Not a good place to dwell.

https://blog.myhelps.us/how-to-overcome-fear-and-find-joy-part-1-the-energy-of-fear/

Today I want to teach you how to use positive energy to clear the negative energies of fear. But first I want to touch on one of the spiritual laws of the universe. i.e The Law of Sowing and Reaping.
We all know of the physical laws like gravity.
Some laws are physical and some are spiritual and quantum.
Understanding the Law of Sowing and Reaping can change your world.
Understanding that whatever you create it in the spiritual world will manifest in the physical world.
Put another way means that whatever you plant in your mind you will manifest in your physical world.

Just like planting an apple tree.
In the spiritual world,
The soil is your mind.
The seeds are your thoughts.
The water are your actions.
And the sun is your feelings.

If you allow fear to dwell in your heart and mind every day you will manifest an apple orchard in your reality.

Energy flows where attention goes.

Whatever you focus on expands.
Everything is energy and all energy attracts similar energy.
You can’t put out negative energy and expect positive results.
You can’t plant apple trees and expect oranges.
Likewise, you can’t focus on what you fear and produce a successful result.
If you are constantly thinking of the things you fear, you are planting a seed and based in the universal law of reaping and sowing it must germinate.
The mind or consciousness is connected to reality.
Think of something strong enough or long enough to and it will eventually manifest in your reality.

These are six words you must stamp on your mind.

“You become what you think about”

When you realize that your mind is a garden you will begin to plant only the things you desire.
So, write down something that is opposite of what you fear and start giving it the same attention you have been giving your fear.
Since light conquers darkness it will eventually have your fear for lunch!

This means whatever you fear you will attract. So, if you fear being alone that is what you will be, alone. If you fear your spouse will leave you, be prepared for that reality. It is very very important to replace your fears with your desires.

Transform your Mind TuneIn Radio
TuneIn Radio

Conclusion Life coaching session, Who am I

As we wrap up this episode, let’s recap
Ask yourself these questions:
Who am I?
What are my deepest values. What do I care about the most?
What are my preferences and priorities?
Who and what is important to me?
What makes me happy. What images make me cry?
How do I react to things or people who hurt me?
What do I fear the most?

As a certified Mindset Coach, I have designed a 6 Part Coaching program that starts off by bringing clarity to Who You Are because that is how you show up in your personal interactions.

Additional Resources 

Ask Coach Myrna: How to Start Over?