The Pursuit of Happiness: Letting go of your Emotional Baggage

the pursuit of happiness

In, the pursuit of happiness, we need to first let go or or mental cows or, emotional baggage. In this podcast episode, coach Myrna explores the metaphorical cows that bind us, such as societal expectations, comparisons, grudges, and material pursuits. Learn how to identify and release these burdens, freeing yourself to find genuine joy and contentment and, the pursuit of happiness.

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Key Takeaways:

  • Emotional baggage can hinder our, pursuit of happiness, by binding us to routines, expectations, and unnecessary burdens.
  • Letting go of our mental cows, such as societal expectations, comparisons, grudges, and material pursuits, is essential for finding genuine joy.
  • By releasing these mental constraints, we create space for happiness to flourish and live life on our own terms.

Identifying Your Herd: Recognizing Your Mental Cows

Here is a story told by the Buddha to illustrate:

The Buddha told this story

A few monks were sitting on a bench when a farmer passed by. The farmer said honorable monks Did you see my cows pass by? I have 12 cows and they all ran away, also this year my farm got invaded by pests so I didn’t get a crop. I am so distressed; I want to kill myself.

The monk felt compassion for the man and said so sorry for your loss but we did not see your cows pass by.

Then he said to the other monks. Do you know why you are happy? It is because you don’t have any cows.

Transform Your Mind Podcast Pandora
Transform Your Mind Podcast Pandora

Identify your metaphorical cows

In, the pursuit of happiness, we often find ourselves burdened by, emotional baggage. These metaphorical cows represent the things that bind us and make us slaves to routines, expectations, and unnecessary burdens. The Buddha's story about the farmer and his cows serves as a powerful reminder that our attachment to these things can prevent us from finding true happiness.

One of the first steps towards reclaiming our happiness is to identify our, mental cows. This requires introspection and self-awareness. We must ask ourselves what we believe we need to be happy. It could be a material possession, a certain lifestyle, or societal approval. For example, a client of mine believed that she needed to live in a condo on the water to be happy. However, this belief was preventing her from enjoying her current living situation. By acknowledging our, mental cows, we can begin to free ourselves from their grip in, the pursuit of happiness.

The Buddha said, “Do you know why you are happy? It is because you don't have any cows.” This statement reminds us that our attachment to these things is what causes our suffering. When we let go of our, emotional baggage, we free ourselves from the constant worry of losing or chasing after these things. Happiness becomes available to us when we are no longer bound by what life should look like.

Transform Your Mind Podcast Player FM
Transform Your Mind Podcast Player FM

The Tether of Expectations: Breaking Free from Societal Pressures

Society often imposes expectations on us that can feel like a heavy yoke around our necks. These, societal norms, dictate how we should live, what we should achieve, and who we should be. However, blindly conforming to these expectations can prevent us from living authentically and finding true happiness.

It is essential to challenge and reevaluate these expectations. We must distinguish between, societal norms, and our authentic desires. By releasing the pressure to conform, we can liberate ourselves and experience a sense of freedom and well-being. For example, many women feel like they need to be married by a certain age to be considered successful. However, by questioning this expectation and embracing their own timeline, they can find happiness on their own terms.

The Buddha and Jesus serve as powerful examples of individuals who were free from societal expectations. They did not have houses or bank accounts, yet they were able to find true happiness. This does not mean that we should not have homes or bank accounts, but rather that we should not be slaves to these things. True happiness comes from living authentically and not being bound by societal pressures.

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Pursuit of happiness: Escaping the Comparison Trap

One of the, mental cows, that hinder our happiness is the habit of comparing ourselves to others. When we measure our worth against someone else's standards, we diminish our own joy. Each person's journey is unique, and true happiness comes from embracing our individuality.

The Buddha said, “Holding onto grudges is like tethering yourself to a resentful past.” This statement reminds us that holding onto grudges is another mental cow that restricts our emotional freedom. By practicing forgiveness, not as a favor to others but as a gift to ourselves, we can release the weight of past grievances and create space for happiness to flourish.

Letting go of comparison requires a shift in mindset. We must recognize that our worth is not determined by external factors or the achievements of others. Instead, we should focus on our own personal growth and celebrate our unique qualities and accomplishments. By embracing our individuality, we can break free from the comparison trap in our, pursuit of happiness.

Materialism as a Ball and Chain: Redefining Success and Wealth

In our society, the pursuit of material wealth often becomes a relentless chase. Possessions and external markers of success can turn into mental cows that dictate our worth. However, in the, pursuit of happiness, we must realize that happiness cannot be found in material possessions alone.

It is essential to redefine our definition of success and wealth. Instead of placing emphasis solely on material possessions, we should prioritize experiences, relationships, and personal growth. By doing so, we liberate ourselves from the shackles of materialism and open ourselves up to a more fulfilling and meaningful life.

The Buddha and Jesus were both free from the attachment to material possessions. They found happiness in their spiritual journeys and their ability to connect with others on a deeper level. This does not mean that we should renounce all material possessions, but rather that we should not be slaves to them. True wealth comes from within and is not dependent on external factors.

Conclusion

In the, pursuit of happiness, it is crucial to let go of our, emotional baggage. These, metaphorical cows, such as, societal expectations, comparisons, grudges, and material pursuits, can hinder our ability to find genuine joy. By identifying and releasing these mental constraints, we create space for happiness to flourish and live life on our own terms.

The Buddha's story about the farmer and his cows serves as a powerful reminder that our attachment to these things is what causes our suffering. True happiness is only available to us when we are free from the bonds of what life should look like. By letting go of our emotional baggage, we can find a renewed sense of purpose and contentment, reveling in the authentic joy that arises when we live on our terms.

So, take a moment to reflect on your own, mental cows. What are the things that bind you and prevent you from finding true happiness? Is it societal expectations, comparisons, grudges, or material pursuits? By acknowledging and releasing these burdens, you can embark on a journey towards a more fulfilling and joyful life. Remember, happiness is found when we let go and live life on our own terms.

Additional Resources

Funding Global Consciousness and Mental Awareness

The Power of Drinking Your Cup of Suffering

Drink your cup of suffering

In this blog post, I'm exploring the concept of drinking your, cup of suffering, like Jesus did. Jesus asked God to take this, cup of suffering, from him if it is his will. But Jesus had to drink his, cup of suffering, to get to his purpose and destiny.

Suffering is usually the pathway to, personal growth, so you must learn to, embrace pain, and suffering as part of your journey and growth. When you drink your, cup of suffering, you're able to transform your pain and suffering into something positive. This podcast episode is about finding compassion and strength in the face of difficulty, and it's something that can be helpful on any journey. If you're looking for a way to overcome hardship, this episode is for you!

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Why Jesus had to drink his cup of suffering

In the garden of Gethsemane Jesus, born with the ability to see his future knew of his impending death. He knew his purpose for becoming God in the flesh was to die for our sins, yet even as a God in flesh he was not looking forward to suffering. The scripture says he became anguished and distressed.

He told his disciples “My soul is crushed with grief to the point of death. He prayed to God his father and asked him to take the, cup of suffering, from him, if it is his will. Then he prayed again and said “if this, cup of suffering, cannot be taken away unless I drink it, then your will be done.

So, let’s talk today about suffering. Most of us will suffer before we die just like Jesus did. The Buddha teaches that we can transcend suffering with our minds.

Transform Your Mind Luminary podcast
Transform Your Mind Luminary podcast

Embrace your pain and suffering

Let’s imagine that you were just given a diagnosis of stage 4 cancer. So like Jesus you know suffering is coming and maybe even death.

You pray and ask God for a miracle, but at some point, you realize that you have to drink your, cup of suffering.

One of the ways to drink your, cup of suffering, and not choke, is to look at what comes after your suffering.

Jesus knew that he would raise from the dead in 3 days and his suffering was for a purpose. The shedding of his blood was to redeem our sins. So, he made plans with his disciples. He told them “after I have been raised from the dead, I will go ahead of you to Galilee and meet you there.”

podhero podcast Transform Your Mind
Podhero podcast

Make plans to meet on the other side of suffering

So, if you have been given a diagnosis that could lead to suffering and pain, if you can see yourself healed and maybe taking that trip that’s still on your bucket list. See yourself with family and friends totally healthy and cancer free. That will allow you to be in pain, but not suffer. Suffering is resistance to the now. As Eckhart Tolle teaches the now is already here there is nothing you can do, other than accept it.

All suffering is emotionally created and is due to resistance. If you refuse to go with the flow of life, you will suffer. Suffering is usually for a purpose. You must have deep pain or suffering to be drawn to the spiritual dimension.

And if it is God’s will that you transition to the other side you will still meet up with friends and family who are waiting for you there in heaven.

The Buddha on suffering

Anyone who has had even the briefest introduction to Buddhist teaching is familiar with its starting point: the inescapable truth that existence entails suffering. Buddhist psychology makes a clear distinction between pain and suffering. Pain is an unavoidable aspect of the natural world. It is physical, biological, and social, woven into our existence as night is with day, as inevitable as hard and soft, as hot and cold.

In this human incarnation we experience a continuous ebb and flow of pleasure and pain, gain and loss. Suffering is different from pain. Suffering is caused by our reaction to the inevitable pain of life. Our personal suffering can include anxiety, depression, fear, confusion, grief, anger, hurt, addiction, jealousy, and frustration. But suffering is not only personal.

Our collective suffering grows from human greed, hatred, and ignorance, bringing warfare and racism; the isolation and torture of prisoners; fueling the unnecessary hunger, sickness, and abandonment of human beings on every continent. This individual and collective suffering.

Conclusion

Pain is inevitable part of life, suffering is optional.

Thanks for tuning into this weeks episode of 5 min Fridays with coach Myrna.

Additional Resources 

The Emotional Trials and Triumphs of Cancer

How To Use Buddhism to Help With Trauma

Using Buddhism to release trauma

We all have, generational trauma,  and suppressing, trauma, and being oblivious and a lot of time, depending on when, trauma, occurs. It can affect how much we remember. Where is my mind? It follows me wherever I go. Buddhism, is about understanding how the, mind, works.

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Bio

Melissa Moore PhD has dedicated her adult life to teaching the tenets of Buddhism and Contemplative Psychology, helping students better manage their emotions, explore the notion of intrinsic health, and understand their interconnected, non-dual nature.

Melissa's latest book, The Diamonds Within Us, brings modern context to ancient Tibetan Buddhist teachings. The lessons within this book aim to help readers discover how to better integrate their human experience to live more empowered lives. Melissa reveals how to befriend yourself as you are, and access the wisdom of emotions. She teaches how to embody deep listening skills, using resources when working with others, address long-standing fears and challenges in relationships, explore and sync with the invisible forces of life, and much more.

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Where is my mind: The Body and Mind are inseparable

Myrna: You said that your mind follows you wherever you go. Where is my mind?

Melissa: Wherever you find the body you find the mind, it is inseparable from the body. We can sense and store experiences in our bodies. That's part of our mind, our thinking mind is always thinking about the future or thinking about the past. We are never in the, present moment.  Where is my mind,?  It's never focused on what I am doing.  And so wherever we go, there you are, and so you can't really ever get away from yourself. Right?

So, where is my mind? How do I befriend it?  We're always trying to change ourselves, which is another form of aggression. When we're trying not to be who we are, we are not being kind to ourselves. Every one of us is actually pretty perfect as we are even when we have disabilities and problems. There's a jewel inside all of us, but we need the right conditions for that to shine.

Myrna: It that a part of, contemplative psychology? What is the definition of, contemplative psychology?

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What is Contemplative psychology

Melissa: Contemplative psychology, is, Buddhist psychology,  in an engaged form. So Buddha, God, whenever you study, Buddhism, you're studying, Buddhist psychology, because, Buddhism, is the language of, psychology, right? Buddhism, is about understanding how the, mind, works.  The, Buddhist, path and what makes it so appealing is it can be done very intellectually.

In, karuna, as in, contemplative psychology, we make it very experiential.  We not only talk about the teachings of the five skandhas, which is how the, mind, creates itself, but we look at those aspects of, mind, how we engage them in our daily life. So we sort of study under the hood, how the, mind, operates, but we bring it personally down into what that means on a day to day basis. We do a lot of experiential exercises, and processes and methods that teach us about the non duality that you and I are not separate.

Myrna: All right. I like that. So if you're saying that the, mind, follows us wherever we go, and the, mind, is in the body, I'm assuming that your work is teaching people how to not have the, mind, follow them. Is that correct?

Melissa: It's not that you don't want your, mind, with you in your body. It's a question of what your, mind, is doing.

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Using Buddhism to release trauma

Myrna: That's what I meant. Let's take for instance, right, you talk about women, or I think you said women, but let's say anyone that has a mental issue, and or maybe they have, trauma, from their past, and they're stuck in the past. Because their, mind, is following them in the, present moment. Their body has all kinds of disease and all kinds of pain. So when you go through the, karuna, program,  are you are telling them how to release the, mind?

Melissa: Not to release it, much more how to utilize it. I teach  how to utilize and work with your, mind, so that there's a certain amount of, mind training, that happens which has to do with learning how to synchronize your body, your breath or your speech because speech is not only what you know, from a, Buddhist, perspective, we say synchronize your body, speech and mind together, the, present moment.

And most of the time we're not doing that, right. We're doing one thing we're driving in the body. The, mind, is thinking about what we have to do or what we didn't do. Or we may be driving and we might be feeling bad because our kid got a bad grade or something. You know, we were constantly multitasking. We're splintered. But when we learn to synchronize our body, speech and mind in the, present moment, even just sometimes, then it is powerful.

It took me a very long time to learn how to do that because I did have a lot of, trauma, in my body. And it's only recently that I've been able to access some of that with some of the new therapies and things so this doesn't isn't an answer for all.  We are addressing, trauma, because we're learning so much about, trauma, and how it abides in the body.

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Using Buddhism to welcome the present moment

But learning how to bring your, mind, to the, present moment, and experience what you're experiencing in the, present moment, is profoundly powerful. So usually we use our body to anchor ourselves in feeling. Sometimes we're thinking so wildly,  we can't do anything except feel your body right now. How it feels, how it's sitting in the room.

Just bringing your breath into the present moment  and then kind of scan your body puts you in touch with your feelings. Your, mind, is located somewhere in your body. You can use your body as an anchor to the, present moment, and bring yourself present. And then we teach how to work with those emotions because all emotions from our perspective, have wisdom.

But a lot of times we're managing them we go.  I don't want to feel that so how are you doing? I'm fine. You know, we have real conditioned ways of working. Or another alternative is we can act on our, emotions. But really to meet the, emotion, we have to feel it in the body. We experience it fully and listen. And that's where the, contemplative psychology, part is.

You befriend us you actually befriended it as your teacher, and take it as in  because, emotions, can be very difficult and painful. So there's a certain amount of training ourselves to abide in discomfort without acting out and without suppressing things. So that takes time.

We all have, generational trauma,  and suppressing, trauma, and being oblivious and a lot of time, depending on when, trauma, occurs. It can affect how much we remember.  A lot of my, trauma, was pre verbal, right? So took me a lot to be able to recover that. But what do I mean when I say your, mind, follows you? So I'm talking about our, habits of mind. And of course, trauma, informs our, habits of mind. Right?

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Transform your Mind Stitcher
Transform your Mind Stitcher

Understanding the emotional content around trauma

So the training isn't it about releasing it, because there is work to be done to release and discover, trauma, but our work has to do with understanding that there's some emotional content around it and that emotional content has wisdom. And it you know, for example, like anger, people don't want to feel angry, right? But anger has a real purpose. It's for one thing, it's how we set boundaries. How we know how to say no, when we need to say no. It's also how we can learn what we don't want in life and being very clear about you know, it sharpens the mind. Right? Or even jealousy, which is usually coming out of a comparative thing where we're comparing ourselves,

Myrna: I'm a Christian. And what I've heard about, Buddhism, is a from Buddha himself and, and his teachings about suffering and his teachings about, the mind.  I also follow guru's like  Sadhguru and Deepak Chopra. So, first of all, talk to us about, Buddhism. What is Buddhism?  What are some of the foundational principles of, Buddhism, and then we want to talk about this, tantric Buddhism, because, to me, when I hear the word, tantric, I'm thinking sexual energy.

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Google Podcast Transform Your Mind
Google Podcast Transform Your Mind

Buddhism was not from Buddha

Melissa: Well, Buddhist, Buddhism, really wasn't from the, Buddha.  Buddha, himself was not a, Buddhist. And it's a what I love about, Buddhism. I've had many people of other faiths in my trainings, because, Buddhism, is kind of a philosophy or an understanding of the, mind, and the development of the heart to be beneficial to others. And of course, all religions have their version of that.

But, Buddhism, offers a very distinct path of, meditation, where you learned, not everybody can meditate.  I've recently I'm really reevaluating because, Buddhism, like everything else has been colonized in America and whitewashed. So I want an individualized tool teaching us about  learning how, meditation, is the tool to teach us how to synchronize our body, our speech and our breath, that which exchanges with the world in our, mind, in the, present moment, and that is how we evoke sanity.

So many people come to my trainings and I'm very specific, that I'm not offering a spiritual path.  I'm condensing down the teachings of the, Buddha, and a very ancient recipe of how to develop a potent heart, a compassionate heart. That's an essential recipe into western psychological process. And then also how to bring that presence to others. Like as a listening presence or as a compassionate friend. And so these kinds of trainings, don't have anything to do with, Buddhism,  except that we draw on the wisdom of, Buddhism, but one doesn't need to be a, Buddhist.

Listen Notes Transform Your Mind
Listen Notes Transform Your Mind

Tantric Buddhism originated with Hinduism

Okay, wants to get into, tantric Buddhism. So it was initiated by a very wild character named Padma Sun bhava, who went to Tibet. And he's brought, Buddhism, to Tibet in the eighth century, and he was bringing, Tantra, which is basically, tantric. Tantra, teachings come from Hinduism, and the Vedic tradition came before them it kind of married with, Buddhism, right? All these traditions marry. But, Buddhism, a, tantric Buddhism simply means using anything in the world to wake up, including things that you wouldn't consider spiritual.
Sexuality is kind of where it's been taken, especially in North America in the hippie days, everybody was doing, Tantra. One should be very careful if someone says I'm going to teach you, tantric Buddhism. Wrong because it's a very specific lineage that needs to be built on the foundation of all the other, Buddhism, the classical, Buddhism, of no harm.

So I think we have to be careful with this word, tantric Buddhism. It just simply means using anything to wake up like one's habits or addictions or that you can wake up and become a kind and compassionate person. So it's about a path of transmutation.

Book The Diamonds With Us
Book: The Diamonds With Us

Book The Diamond Within Us

Myrna: Okay, so that's awesome. All right. So you wrote your book and you call it “The Diamond Within US”  or conversation has been about understanding your your mind body, and, and looking inside you mentioned that we have we're all gems, right. So tell us about what do you mean by the, diamond within us? Also why you wrote the book and what do you want people to walk away with after reading the book?

Melissa: Well, we have a practice in, Karuna, training called shining the dual, which is where we bear witness to others skills and holding others in compassionate exchange. First we learn how to see everyone as having strengths, real strengths, genuine strengths, authentic strengths, and how to call those out.  They may not be your strengths and they wouldn't be how you would do it, but how do you see through the eyes of people what they bring which is different than you? Right?

And we practice that in, karuna, it takes a kind of intensity and intensification the same way diamonds take a lot of intensification and are formed in the  muck and slime. Just like lotuses the classic tradition is lotuses grow in the muck and slime but they're pure and white on the outside. It's the same principle that we had, and I really do truly believe because I have worked with all walks of life and and even people suffering with very chronic mental conditions such as schizophrenia and some of these very difficult mental states.

Transform Your Mind Podverse.fm
Transform Your Mind Podverse.fm

The teaching of Karuna

So, the book is really an offering of the teaching that I've done. It doesn't follow the curriculum of, karuna, but it's also used as a kind of textbook in, karuna, training. But it's also just an offering because a lot of people don't know what, contemplative psychology, is.  I hope they will because I feel like what I'm teaching should be taught in kindergarten, honestly, I feel it is the operating system of our body speech and mind and we don't know how to use it.

Myrna: What do you want them to walk away with after reading?

Melissa: Well, I hope that my book instills the importance of loving kindness, that it can be cultivated towards ourselves and towards others, that making friends with our strengths exactly as we are with all of our warts and our problems.

Myrna: Well that's good, that's another way of saying, self love, people might think, why do we need to teach, self love, but you're right. A lot of people don't love themselves, they look in the mirror, and they don't like what they see. Tell us about  your website. I'm assuming that you offer the, Karuna, classes on your website or courses, right?

Melissa: Well, we don't offer courses through the website www.karunatraining.com that we advertise and if they come to our website or in a training, you can sign up for our mailing list and then you'll get our newsletters.  I am about to launch information about a new cohort because we do our bigger trainings or certificates in cohorts. so we'll probably start  in the spring, I'm just getting ready to publish that and putting it all together. And then we have other courses every month. We have a, Karuna, live where people can come on live time and we do a little, meditation. There's usually a topic and a talk that goes along with our newsletter, and then we do an experiential exercise so people can get a taste of the work.

Additional Resources

Is the Mind in the Brain?

How to Overcome Fear and Find Joy

Fear, is an, energy, and thoughts are the most powerful, energy,  force in the universe.  Thoughts can be either positive or negative.
Heading up the rear of, negative thoughts, is, fear. It is the bottom feeder or all the emotions.
If you allow, fear, to linger in your body and in your mind, It will not only attract the thing you, fear, the most into your experience; but it will also bring disease to your body.
All diseases can be traced back to, negative thoughts, or, fear. Negative thoughts, transform your body into an acidic state.

Fear, is a, negative thought, magnified to the 1000th degree.

In, fear,  mode your body is activated in the fight or flight mode.
Your body tenses, your breathing is shallow, your heart palpitates, your blood pressure is elevated, your hands and body sweat.
Not a good place to dwell!
Unfortunately, your brain cannot detect the difference between your imagination and reality, so the person in the grip of fear cannot tell the difference. They cannot tell that, fear, it is “False Evidence Appearing Real.”

Using Positive Energy to banish Fear

Today I want to teach you how to use, positive energy, to clear the, negative energy, of, fear. But first I want to review one of the Spiritual Laws of the Universe.

The Law of Sowing and Reaping

We all know of the physical laws like, Gravity.
Some laws are physical and some are Spiritual and quantum.
Understanding the spiritual “Law of Sowing and reaping” can change your world.
Understanding that whatever you create it in the spiritual world of your thoughts will manifest in the physical world.

Put another way, that means whatever you plant in the fertile soil of your mind, will manifest in your physical world.
Just like planting an apple tree. Except that in the spiritual world;

The soil is your mind, The seeds are your thoughts,
The water are your actions,
And The sun is your feelings.

If you allow, fear, to dwell in your heart and mind every day you will manifest an apple orchard in your reality.

Energy flows where Attention Goes

Whatever you focus on expands.

Fear is Negative Energy

Everything is, energy, and all, energy, attracts similar energies.
You can't put out, negative energy, and expect positive results.
You can't plant apple trees and expect oranges.

Likewise, you can't focus on what you, fear, and produce a successful result.
If you are constantly thinking of the things you, fear, you are planting a seed and based in the universal Law of Reaping and Sowing, it must germinate.
The mind or consciousness is connected to reality.
Think of something strong enough or long enough to and it will eventually manifest in your reality.
These are six words you must stamp on your mind

“You become what you think about”

When you realize that your mind is a garden you will begin to plant only the things you desire.

How to overcome fear

Exercise: How to overcome fear, write down something that is opposite of what you, fear, and start giving it the same attention you have been giving your, fear.
Since light conquers darkness, it will eventually have your, fear, for lunch!

  • Imagine you having fun traveling the world in crystal clear clarity.
  • Say daily affirmations that compliments your desire.
  • Visualize your goal so much that sometimes you are not sure what is imagined and what is reality;
  • the same way that you let fear take you out of reality.
  • Don't get disappointed if it takes time to perfect this. Remember that positive things take time to manifest,
  • it is the negative ones that show up quickly.

Weeds will sprout up, negative thoughts, of failure will sprout up.
So, every morning find the weeds and dig them up.

Remember a successful gardener will always cultivate his land.

Cultivate your mind for success.
Life is energy, whatever you put out, is returned to you.
The mind does not care what seeds you plant; it will always return what you plant.
You can plant wealth or you can plant poverty.
You can plant fear or you can plant happiness.

Here is an excerpt from the book: The Wise Heart: A Guide to the Universal Teachings of Buddhist Psychology:
The Buddha faced plenty of his own fear and terror of imminent death. This is a passage from the Buddha’s early writings that Jack Kornfield, a teacher who helped introduce Buddhist mindfulness practice to the West, quotes in his book.

How would it be if in the dark of the month, with no moon, I were to enter the most strange and frightening places, near tombs and in the thick of the forest, that I might come to understand fear and terror. And doing so, a wild animal would approach or the wind rustle the leaves and I would think, “Perhaps the fear and terror now comes.” And being resolved to dispel the hold of that fear and terror, I remained in whatever posture it arose, sitting or standing, walking or lying down. I did not change until I had faced that fear and terror in that very posture, until I was free of its hold upon me … And having this thought, I did so. By facing the, fear, and terror I became free.

Do not Fear: Definition of fear

Fear – False objects appearing real, as per the about passage, can be released by standing your ground. Our instinctive reaction to, fear, is to turn and run because as humans we are hard wired to run from pain and towards pleasure. But, as the Buddha teaches in the passage above if you stand and have the courage to not move, you become free you, let go of fear, and realize that your imagination is always worse than the reality.

Let me share a personal story on how I overcame, fear and, remove negative energy from home. 

When I first came to the United States of America, I came as a business owner. I did not have any of the benefits of a permanent resident. As my business was building, I decided to earn money as a sales person selling vacations. I was not authorized to work in the US, so I became very fearful of being found out and being deported. Every night I would dream that the immigration officials would come to my house and take me away in handcuffs. Sometimes I would dream that they would throw me in the back of the trunk.

One day, my pastor preached a sermon on, the fear factor. He said that God promises to carry your burdens, so give them to God. He said when you give your, fears, and heavy loads to God, you can't worry or take them back because that would mean that you don't have faith in God's promise to carry them. He asked the congregation to write our, fears, and heavy burdens on a piece of paper and ceremoniously throw them at the alter giving them to God. I wrote my, fear, of being deported on a piece of paper and threw in on the alter. In doing so, I, let go of fear, and became free because I gave it away to someone else, God. The good news is that I no longer was afraid of anything. Every time something came up that would potentially me fearful, I would face it and know that it will work out for my good. I stood on the scripture “I know the plans I have for you, plans to prosper you.”

Meditation to Let go of Fear

Sit quietly in a chair, be comfortable.
Place feet flat on the floor, hands clasped in your lap. Close your eyes. Be present. Focus on your breathing, feel your belly rise and fall under your clasped hands.
Breathe in for a count of 4 and breathe out for account of 6. Thus, slowing down your rhythmic cycles. Be mindful of the air as it passes through your nostrils down your esophagus and into your abdomen. If your mind wanders off bring it back gently to your breathe. Your mind can only concentrate on one thing at a time. Concentrating on your breathe bypasses your mind. Once you slow your cycles and quiet your mind, you are now in the receptive mode to change your programming.

Think briefly about something you, fear. Today we will use as our example the, fear of flying. Today we are going to use our imagination to replicate the experience of flying while you are sitting comfortably and safely in your chair.

Let's begin. visualize you are at the airport with your loved ones, your husband and 2 children. You are on your way to Venice, Italy. You chose Venice because you wanted a romantic vacation with your husband. You can't wait to ride on the Gondolas and be serenaded with live music, going to the opera and have the experience of taking a water taxi everywhere. You are excited. This energy is positive. You let this feeling of euphoria wash over you, you feel your body tingle with this positive energy. You feel good!
Now you are boarding the plane, you are starting to feel a little anxious. You board the plane and find your seat, you buckle yourself in. The pilot announces that your flight time is 6 hours and that he will be flying at a cruising altitude of 35,000 feet. He advises you to give your attention the flight attendant and pay attention to the safety information. You mentally note your exits. You listen to what to do in the event of a water landing! Your mind is going nuts with fear. Your heart starts to palpitate rapidly, you start to sweat.

Now the airplane is taxing down the runway at full speed, then lifts off the ground.
You squeeze your husband's hand, you are hardly breathing, your whole body is tight. The plane is climbing it shakes a little. You are so scared the sweat starts dripping from your forehead. The plane reaches cruising altitude, the pilot turns off the fasten seat belt sign and people start moving about the plane. You calm down a little, but still aware of every movement of the plane. The flight attendants come around and offer beverages. You ask for a glass of wine. You drink it down in one gulp! You start to feel calmer. The flight is uneventful. After what seems like an eternity the pilot announces that in 30 minutes he will be starting his descent into Venice. Your fear returns, the plane shakes a little as it descends and you are once again in the grip of fear. The plane touches down and speeds down the runway braking speed. Your body is tight, your breathing shallow. Then it is all over. You faced your fear and came out on the other side! You exit the plane and you are in Venice!

I want you now to realize that you have taken your first flight in your mind.
I want you to realize that fear is false evidence appearing real.
I want you to realize that once you face your fear, like a bully, it backs down.
I want you to realize that the energy of fear is keeping you stuck.
I want you to realize that whatever your fear, just like we took a ride on an airplane and came out alive on the other side that is how all fear works. It has no real power over you. The only thing that is holding you back from doing the things you want to do is all in your mind. So, the only way the clear it is to start with the mind. Do a dress rehearsal in the mind and then do it in the physical.

The first step in How to overcome fear is to face the fear.

The second step is to clear it from the place it is planted in your mind. Take a moment now to ask your higher self where the fear of flying came from. When was the fear planted? When you get the answer, you may think to yourself, boy that was silly or you may have a legitimate reason to be afraid of flying. Someone you know could have died in a plane crash or you yourself could have been in a plane emergency landing. The thing to remember is that you know that every time you drive on the highway you could die and you are aware of thousands of people who have died in car accidents; yet few people have a fear of driving in a car.
So, consciousness is the second step.

The third step is to clear that energy by replacing it with, positive energy. We are going to use the, positive energy, of gratitude. Sit comfortably again. Imagine a bright light entering the crown of your head moving down through your check, down your throat to your chest, down your abdomen through your feet.
Feel this light fill all your energy centers as you become fully relaxed. Now expand this energy out from your chest past the room, past your city, past your country, past the clouds, past the sun, past the planet into the stratosphere. You are now floating in cyberspace. If you can bring your fear to mind in this space, do so now.

Then replace that feeling of fear with the feeling of gratitude. Gratitude that you are alive, gratitude that you are in your sound mind, gratitude that you have a place to sleep and food to eat. Gratitude that you are wealthier than 95% of the people in the world and you have the resources to travel to exotic destinations. Gratitude that you will not let fear rob you of your joy.
Now set the intention to fly to the first place on your bucket list within the year.

If you found this post helpful, I would love to hear your comments on what your fears are, and if you achieved a successful result transferring it with these exercises. Please share this podcast and blog post with friends and family and remember to subscribe and post a review.
Transform your Mind podcast is giving away a Free Checklist you can do every morning to replace your fears with positive affirmations.
To receive please subscribe, rate and review this podcast then send me an email to info@myhelps.us with the subject line iTunes review.
Until next time Namaste

Additional Resources

No Fear : How to Live with Courage

Is Love the Same in Christianity, Hinduism and Buddhism?

love christianity hinduism
Love,  in, Christianity, is reflected in God's love for us, he sent his only begotten son, Jesus Christ, to die for our sins. The bible, teaches us to Love one another as we love ourselves.
The Bible, “For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in, Christ Jesus, our Lord.”

Love, in, Christianity 

Jesus Christ, is my teacher and the Son Of God.  Loving yourself is more than providing the necessities of life for oneself. It is more than finding good employment, providing for one' s family, a nice house and some money in the bank. It is deeper than that.
Love, is spirit. It can be felt by strangers. It is a force of good and a power that connects us all. When you, love in Christianity, you take time to know and acquaint yourself with this force.  We are dually physical and non-physical beings, it is the secret to access the quantum universe.
Unfortunately, most of us only concentrate on the physical because that is what we see. We think we, love, ourselves because we take care of our bodies.
  • We exercise (some of us).
  • We eat nutritious foods that nourish our bodies (some of us)
  • and we protect ourselves from the sun and get the recommended amount of sleep (again some of us).

But how often can a stranger feels your, love, because you gave them a welcoming smile? How often do you find a quiet spot and pay attention to your breathing, your source and the center of your spirit? How often do you feel the, love, from a flower or from the stillness of a tree? God shows his love in, the bible, verses about, love, and by the beauty he created in nature. When we show our appreciation for nature we find God in beauty.

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Have you ever felt love from an inanimate object like a painting or a building? I visited the Taj Mahal earlier this month. It is one of the seven wonders of the world because of it's beauty. When you visit the Taj Mahal you feel the love for which it was intended. The building was constructed to immortalize Emperor Shah Jahan's, love, for his wife.  So, love in Christianity, means to appreciate your neighbor, as you appreciate yourself, extend that feeling past the boundaries of your family and trauma and make the world a better place to live.

Love in, Hinduism

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Hinduism, The eternal affection of Radha and Krishna has been the subject of great, religion, and philosophical imagery and is one of the foundational ethos of Hindu dharma.
The, love, of Radha and Krishna is not rooted in physicality. On the contrary it is allegorical. Jesus Christ, says “the mind that constantly remembers me, comes to dissolve and revel in me”.
Radha is the personification of this deeply devoted mind. The pain of Radha's separation from Krishna is the pain of the estranged soul searching for the embrace of the universal spirit. Radha is the individual and Krishna is the essence and objective of life.
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Radha is always the chosen one, but when Radha realizes the pride of having the Supreme Lord all to herself was coloring her mind, he disappears from her heart. Krishna then multiplies himself to be present between every two Gopis. The Gopis are believed to represent thought waves. The presence of Krishna between every two  Gopis, symbolizes that the eternal truth exists everywhere, and it can be perceived by the true seeker even between two thought waves.
Radha represents the purest and most beautiful amongst these divine thoughts and Krishna represents the supreme bliss that can be attained by dedicating one's mind to the divine.
Excerpt from Shyam Banerji “Hindu Gods and Temples”

Love, in, Buddhism

Basic Buddhism  – Buddhism, is both simple and profound. On a daily basis it advocates watching the mind so that all thoughts, actions and words manifest a kind and compassionate attitude towards all others. It is the loving heart that places others above self. Herein lies the ultimate wisdom of existence.
When you understand that the existence of all things, all beings, and all concepts is empty except in relation to other things, beings, and concepts, then you will be close to becoming awakened, crossing into a state of permanent happiness.
When you succeed in eliminating ignorance and replacing it with real wisdom, suffering comes to an end; because in understanding the true nature of existence you are no longer bound by the illusions of Samsara. It is Karma – the law of cause and effect- that gives life it's moral code. The Buddha thus advised doing everything to create good karma, for this has the power to propel you into a rebirth in circumstances that are conducive to practicing Dharma.
Thereby having the chance to attain enlightenment. Practicing Dharma means showing generosity, having a good heart, love, purifying negative karma, and creating good karma. It also means embarking on a spiritual path that leads to enlightenment.

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