We are all, golden buddhas, underneath, we cover up our, inner greatness, with the, mud, of, self-doubt, feelings of, not being good enough, insecurity and other, negative emotions.
In this episode of 5 mins with Coach Myrna, I want to teach on the subject 3 ways to let your, inner greatness, shine through. I want to use the story of the, Golden Buddha, as my foundational story.
Story of the Golden Buddha that was covered up in mud by the monks so that the gold couldn’t shine through.
In Bangkok there is a golden statue of the Buddha that stands 9’8” tall, weighs 5.5 tons and is worth approximately 250 million in gold.
The statue was thought to be built in 1,403 and was revered by Buddhist for many hundreds of years. In 1,757 the Burmese Army was invading Thailand. Facing complete annihilation, the Buddhist monks at the monastery hastily began covering their, Golden Buddha, with plaster, which was painted and inlaid with bits of colored glass, to make it look of little or no value to the invading army. During the invasion all the Buddhist monks were tragically murdered, but the, Golden Buddha, was left undiscovered.
In 1957 an entire Monastery in Thailand was being relocated by a group of monks. One day they were moving a giant clay Buddha when one of the monks noticed a large crack in the clay. On closer investigation he saw there was a golden light emanating from the crack. The monk used a hammer and a chisel to chip away at the clay exterior until he revealed that the statue was in fact made of solid gold.
Don’t cover up your inner greatness with mud
This story illustrates the point that we can cover up our value by layering it with, mud, as well. So let me ask you. What is your, mud?
What life experiences added layers of, mud, and covered up your value to the world?
We are all, golden buddhas, underneath, but we cover up our, inner greatness, with the, mud of self-doubt, feelings of not being good enough, insecurity and other, negative emotions.
Here are 3 ways to chip away at your mud let your inner greatness shine through:
Identify your mud. Is it self-doubt? Lack of self-worth? Body image, not being good enough? You can’t change what you don’t identify and until you dig through the layers of mud you can’t shine and become what you were created to do.
The, false self, is an artificial persona that people create very early in life to protect themselves from re-experiencing developmental trauma, shock, and stress in close relationships.
Meaning, our delusionary self-creation process starts early in our childhood.
Often, we had to be unnaturally attuned to the demands of our parents, sensing we had to comply in order to be loved and tolerated; we had to be false before we had the chance to feel properly alive.
And this continues in our educational systems and careers.
Most of the time, we are putting on a mask, complying with our teachers, our bosses, our colleagues, our partners, our friends…
2. Speak to the mud
if your, mud, is feelings of not being good enough for example then speak to those feelings and tell them that you are good enough, you were created for this purpose. If your, mud, is body image tell it that you are wonderfully made and beauty comes in all shapes and sizes and you are perfect just the way you are.
“Every problem is a gift – without problems we would not grow.” Believing that problems are opportunities to grow, rather than insurmountable obstacles, is called a, growth mindset, and it’s essential if you want to learn how to stop being insecure. Instead of feeling like a failure just because we have, insecurities, we gain the freedom to view those, insecurities, as a source of information for our personal and professional growth.
Instead of avoiding our, insecurities, we learn to speak to them. Most, insecurities, are not based on facts, so you can speak to them and challenge them. As you commit yourself to putting aside your fears and utilizing your insecurity as a source of valuable information, you eliminate the “what ifs” associated with avoidance and open the door to opportunity.
3. Take action to remove the mud:
Our daily behaviors reflect our deepest beliefs.
Clean up your language and speak life into your situation.
Take massive action to change your beliefs.
Train your mind with new beliefs and affirmations.
Realize that you were conditioned to believe that you can’t do something. Think of the elephant that is controlled by a sodden stick in the ground.
Figure out, When did you decide to accept this limitation.
Resources in the mind are unlimited, use the fuel of your thoughts to find the resources to do something great and uncover your, Golden Buddha, your, inner greatness, and let your value shin through.
Conclusion
Thanks for tuning into this week’s episode of 5 min Fridays with Coach Myrna. I want to invite you to join my Facebook group called Lifecoach to be inspired throughout the week. Until next time Namaste
Matheo Galatis teaches how we can connect to our, inner guidance system, to know ourselves and to find, who are you, your beliefs systems inherited from your, genetic patterns. Once you know, who are you, then you will be able to use the, law of Attraction, to get the things you want in life.
Matheo Galatis founder of the, Know Yourself teachings, aimed at supporting you to cut through the confusion in the, personal development industry, and learn about the hidden dynamics that affect your life. He has trained over 200 professional coaches, was a director of a coaching company in South Africa, worked in organizations such as Oracle stratus, South Africa, Mars, Africa and clients from 27 different countries, ranging from successful CEOs, political and public personalities, executives, coaches, trainers, therapists, and entrepreneurs.
But they are mistaking the, personal development industry, to a whole new level by supporting people to find what he calls your, transformational why. The one thing that usually prevents people from getting, unstuck, and achieving their desires.
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We develop our belief systems from genetic patterns
Myrna: That’s an awesome Bio. It seems that you are in the work of service helping people to get to know them selves again. What was your journey to becoming a teacher of, personal development? How do we pick up these, genetic patterns?
Matheo: Essentially this is what happens. To know, who are you, and, know yourself, I explain in quite a bit of detail the different ways we take on stuff from our parents and the generations before. It can happen through observation. When we’re growing up, we have certain experiences and we observe our parents, we start mimicking what our parents do.
So, that’s one way, but it runs even deeper. Our parents, sometimes they have something unexpressed in themselves, a dream or maybe an emotion that’s suppressed. And they’ve suppressed that, they push it down. Now what happens is when they conceive a child, the DNA of the supreme shun or the suppression is obviously encoded into the gene, because everything is according to the gene.
The gene knows there’s a, suppression, and that gene goes into the child and the child now has a, suppression. Now the job of the, suppression, sharing is not to be there. The purpose is when something’s suppressed, it’s suppressed momentarily or temporarily moved and at some point in life it needs to be expressed in words.
For example, if someone has a, suppression, at a very young age and they don’t process it, its hard for them to know, who you are. They don’t work through the short stays inside the system, it’s frozen inside the, muscle memory, in the, subconscious mind, of the brain. And what happens is they continue living with us. Now if they don’t deal with it in their lifetime, that’s obviously restoring the genes and is going to get passed on to the next generation.
Children don’t do well at home, they don’t become aware of it that’s gonna get passed on, so we have something in our evolution that is already in inside of us to help us with, traumatic patterns. Some emotions are blocked, so when children are born later on life at some point they are triggered and that’s what pushes the buttons of the parents.
When children start behaving in ways the parents don’t like, I call the parent control we think wow my child is out of character. The child is not actually out of character, the child is just mirroring or expressing things that the parent doesn’t want to see inside themselves and haven’t processed within themselves.
Children will start acting out bringing forth, subconscious patterns, from their parents. A, guidance system, is your, spiritual journey, where you’ve got like a router or an angel or your higher self, and they’re communicating with you. I like to call this the, inner guidance system, is the connection to your, true self, and finding out, who are you.
Your, guidance system, helps you connect to your, true self, when you’re not connected to your, true self. When you’re connected to yourself, you’re able to distinguish in an instant, what is true and right for you versus what is not. In an instant, there is no debate in the mind. There’s just a sense of yes or a sense of no. And it’s not happening from a fear. It’s not happening from a desire, it’s happening from this, inner knowing.
These, beliefs, are part of our, belief system, there are, family patterns. So, an example with a, belief system. If you have a, belief system, I’m not worthy, how do you behave? If you’re very insecure how do you behave? The other way is to trying to cover up the perceived unworthiness and show that you’re worthy. The, belief system, I’m not worthy is a persona which is not you, it’s just a, belief system.
This belief of unworthiness can develop into a, people pleaser. I’m a, people pleaser. The, people pleaser, that person owner’s a person has developed in order not to feel the unworthiness.
Myrna: I get what you’re saying a lot of times they say the extroverts are covering up some some deep down feeling as well that’s why they need to be the life of the party.
Okay so alright so what we’re talking about though is our, inner guidance system, and, knowing yourself. What you’re saying is you let people understand that the personality that they’re projecting to the world is not real. And you help them to connect to their, inner guidance system, to know themselves.
Letting your inner guidance system uncover who you are
Matheo: Right. So that’s what I mean by, inner guidance system, is that you have a an innate intelligence telling you what’s true and right for you right now. It tells you, who you are.
Myrna: So talk about whats behind, beliefs. I know we talked about that a little bit, but maybe we can expand on it a little bit by because you said, belief systems, are difficult to resolve. So so let’s go with our example that we’re talking about this person that, you know, doesn’t feel that there were any.
So when you go into the training and coaching, you help them understand to peel away those layers and understand, who you are. They’re maybe not feeling worthy because of something they inherited or maybe something somebody said to them 40 years ago, or whatever, you need to peel that back. But why do you think it’s difficult for someone to resolve that specific, belief system?
Matheo: It is challenging working with a, belief system. A, belief system, was created a long time ago so around up to the age from conception up to the age of seven, eight years old our, belief systems, about ourselves and about life and about other people are formed.
How we perceive the world is being created, so this is at an age where the brain is just absorbing everything that is happening in the world and making associations. But a lot of people might rarely even get to that, belief system, because they’re dealing with other, belief systems.
I developed a belief of I’m shy or a persona I’m shy. And because this happened at two years old, I grew up as a shy person, knowing that oh, I’m just shy, I’m just a quiet person, so I’ll become an accountant and an auditor. Yeah, because I’m shy. So, who are you? Are you shy or an extrovert?
Train yourself to connect to your emotions, train your souls to connect to your body, so that you know how you feel at any time, whether it’s good or bad emotions doesn’t matter, connect to them. Allow yourself to have these emotions, because that’s how you’re going to go down into the, beliefs, and into the other aspects that are hidden inside of you.
And that’s what we want to identify and remove what’s hidden. Because when you remove what’s hidden, then you start to become more and more free.
Myrna: And that’s how you, know yourself, and find out, who you are. This is what we’re talking about here. I had a short stint with a therapist. I talked to her for about a month or so, and one of the things I got from those sessions was not to stuff down my feelings but to catch them and breathe into them.
This has been an incredible conversation to highlight your skills highlight what you do for people. And I will tell you there’s so many people that are walking around don’t know, who they are. I don’t want to use I use the word broken, but people become broken from past traumas. So what you what you’re doing is phenomenal. Tell us how somebody can sign up or how you offer this training.
Matheo: The teachers that came before me and many researchers and scientists know that the subconscious runs our life. We’re able to to retrain and recondition the subconscious, but doing it the correct way is important. We have to uncover what’s causing In the subconscious mind to dictate our lives. So I put together the, Know Yourself teachings, and this essentially explains step by step how finding out, who you are, works, how thoughts become, beliefs, how emotions work.
Using your inner guidance system to find out who you are
Emotions, are like a garden system, we go in and out gamify. Not listening to your, inner guidance system, does not bring you back on track.
Myrna: So explain how our, internal guidance system, works when we’re not listening to our own, inner guidance.
Matheo: I go through the five different ways that we take on stuff from our parents, help clients realize that there was are many patterns running their life. Many of them was the specifically looking at the, family patterns.
What is the, foundation of happiness? We live in a culture where, happiness, is largely based on external forces. Like, what did we get and what did we achieve? And that’s basically your, foundation of happiness. And when our life conditions don’t match your expectations, we experience pain and fear. We suffer and become unhappy.
But imagine what it would feel like if you could create a constant sense of, inner peace, and freedom and live each day in a beautiful state. Hi, I’m Coach Myrna young and welcome to, Five minute Fridays with Coach Myrna. I want to ask you what’s preventing you from, happiness, and living in a state of, peace and joy?
I remember watching the, happiness movie, once. And this was a documentary that was recorded in India, where people who are living on maybe $100 a year living in huts with just covering over their head, most of them sleeping on rocks on the floor. And they were, happy. And this is why this was so unusual in the documentary.
It looked at the, foundation of happiness, what is happiness, and what causes, happiness. The end result of what that movie was trying to show was that it doesn’t matter how poor you are, it doesn’t matter if you don’t have a lot of money. What matters most to the people and the, foundation of happiness, is family, and love.
Happiness, is making sure your children are safe and things like that. Research shows that 85% of our, happiness, comes from our, relationships. It’s not just, relationships, with people, it’s, relationship, with God as well. If you don’t believe in God, then your, relationship, with the planet and the universe becomes important, but that is basically how we find, true happiness.
The, foundation of happiness, is living a life of peace and joy. Now, there’s a time when I believed that your spouse, or your children or your boss, or somebody was responsible for our, happiness, but nobody can be responsible for your, happiness. I remember when Jennifer Gardner told the world that Ben Aflec was not responsible for her, happiness. He was not the foundation of her happiness. of course they broke up because he was cheating on her with the nanny but even though she was hurt her, happiness, did not come from external sources and events.
Definition of happiness
Nobody can be responsible for our, happiness. You think that you’re going to be happy when you get a husband or when you get that new car or that new job. But once you get, what you find is when you get these things, you’re not really happy, because, happiness, only comes from internal sources, and I personally found that the, definition of happiness, is correct.
It’s true.
The, definition of happiness, is working towards a goal or purpose.
And that’s where my, happiness, comes from. My ,happiness, comes from me trying to excel in what I do. I am a host on a radio program, podcast, I’m a lifecoach. Things that I am working towards, in order to better myself. I learn something new every day because, I practice CANI which is constant and never ending improvement. And when I find that I’m growing then I’m happy.
Good, personal relationships, enhances my life, when you’re fighting with your husband you’re not thinking of what you don’t have in your life. When you’re in the lack mode, you really can’t access your, inner peace, and joy that actually brings you, happiness. So I want you to discover what’s holding you back from, happiness.
What’s holding you back from being happy. I would like to encourage you to tap in to, inner peace, with, meditation, and, mindfulness, and start living in the, present moment, because, happiness, can only be found in the present moment. That is the, foundation of happiness, being in the present moment. Not in the past, not in the future.
Take the time to sit with your feelings of unhappiness, or pain, or regret. And maybe you can even try to find a lesson in it. Because there’s a test in every testimony. So try to find what the universe or God was trying to teach you with that circumstances that you said, made you unhappy. And then once you sit with it, and feel the pain and not trying to, self medicate, with drugs or food or sex or whatever you do to try to feel better.
You just sit with the painful feelings. When you sit with it, then you you will find that you can stop the pain and allow life to unfold in the beautiful way that it was meant to be. One of the things I do to stop the minor irritations in my personal life and that are trying to take my joy and peace away is to breathe deeply.
People will always irritate you. My little irritation comes when I call my husband, and he doesn’t pick up the phone, and I’m wondering why he can’t hear the phone, or my kids leave the house and not tell me where they’re going and I think it’s disrespectful. So I’ve learned to do something that’s called R&R which is, relax and release. And what this is, I breathe in deeply and relax and then I breathe out through my mouth and release it out.
If you do this breathing method for a few minutes, then you will find that that irritation is no longer there. And the next time that person does that same thing, then you’re actually not going to get irritated because you caught it. Caught it and you relaxed and you released it.
Conclusion
So that is all for today’s five minutes with Coach Myrna. I hope that I shared a few things on, happiness foundation, and maybe you can start doing some of these things. In order for you to, be happy. Remember, happiness, is not from external sources. It is only from your internal peace or moving towards a goal or desire. What you moving towards it, you’re in alignment with the universe and you will be happy. So until next time, Namaste
Bob Doyle, from, the Secret, teaches that we need to do more than concentrate on our, vibration, and, vision boards, for, the law of attraction, to work. We must, rewire our brains. He teaches that the metaphysical aspects of, the law of attraction, or the “reality creation” process is what controls our experiences.
Bob Doyle is best known for his contribution to the film and book “The Secret” as a law of attraction expert and coach. He has been teaching these principles through programs, live events, podcasts, live streams, coaching, writing, and even virtual reality, since 1988. He is driven by his passion for creative self-expression and his work is heavily focused on helping people decide whom they want to be and how they want to express themselves.
Recently Bob’s attention has shifted from the metaphysical aspects of the, law of attraction, or reality creation process to a more grounded and biological look at what controls our experiences…our, brain.
The Law of Attraction and the Secret
Myrna: After 20 years, why to shift away from the, law of attraction, and, the Secret?
Bob: So, after, the Secret, especially, a lot of people got in the game, the law of attraction, experts were putting out their programs and a lot of them didn’t really have the research or experience. They were sort of regurgitating what they got from, the Secret, or had heard. And what happened was that people got very confused about this, law of attraction. Some of them who had not heard of it before, the Secret, got understandably excited about it.
They thought this is how I’m going to get everything I want in my life. I want to learn more about it. So, they go out in the world, and they start learning about it. And they’re learning all of these techniques and they’re learning about, vibration, and resistance and vibrational resonance, and all this stuff. They’re learning about, vision boards, and lists and, visualization, and the whole thing. It’s a lot that they’re trying to figure out and they’re trying all of these different techniques and they’re so focused on getting the, law of attraction, right, that they’re putting almost no focus on the most important thing, which is who do they need to be to attract those things.
When it is through who we’re being, that things happen in the world, our action is expressed the things we say, the thing how we make meaning in the world is all at all a factor of our, brains wiring. So, our experience of reality is all based on how our, brain, is processing this ocean of energy. So, if we’re not getting the results that we want in our life, it’s ultimately a factor of our, brains wiring. So, the reason I’m shifting from, law of attraction, to changing your, brains wiring, in terms of a focus for teaching and coaching and, transformation, is because there’s nothing to get confused about.
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You don’t have to worry about all the processes and the techniques and getting it wrong and self-doubt and all of that stuff. That’s it, and that’s proven science. So how do we change your, brain, so that you can become the person that get the results or attract the results you want?
Myrna: That’s awesome. I do believe that again. I’m one of the ones that went after, the Secret, trying to understand, the law of attraction, and the, vision boarding, and, vibration. But what you’re saying is that if you keep your thoughts clean, and your energy positive, the law of attraction, is not going to work for you unless you, rewire the brain.
Bob: No, it’s not so, this is the problem. We’re getting into this, law of attraction, it’s always working. It’s always working and the focus that we’re putting on it is confusing the issue. We don’t need to understand how gravity works for the glass to fall when we let go of it. We also don’t need to understand how, the law of attraction, works. What we need to do is focus on what action we need to take every day so that, the law of attraction, works automatically. Everything in your life, you’re attracting it, because you’re on this sort of default way of being. It’s an, autopilot.
You may not think of it that way. But because of your, brain’s wiring, you’re not consciously looking at how can you improve your wiring, you’re probably going on, autopilot. And all of those, autopilot, behaviors are getting results in the world, that result in your reality. So different results come from different action, different ways of being.
Myrna: right. Okay, so we’re talking about, rewiring the brain, but we’re talking also about energy and, vibration. I’m trying to understand it for the people that are believed that the energy and vibration is responsible for attracting before we get onto the rewiring.
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Bob: Let me make clear that I am not against any of that, I stood for these principles for 20 years and I still believe them the vibration, the energy, the resonant. That’s all there. The problem and it the magic, if you will, the invisible stuff, but all of those results in the universe presenting you with something. Now you have to act, what you’ve been presented, what are you going to do with it and what action can you take that will affect your, vibration, and send out the stuff all the cool, Law of Attraction, stuff. But if we focus so much on the magic issue or the invisible issue or energy, we’re not rewiring our, brain.
Myrna: Alright, so that’s a good a good segue into how does rewiring the, brain, help us with manifesting in the, law of attraction?
Bob: So, right now we’re manifesting totally on, autopilot. For the most part, most people are manifesting is because of their, autopilot wiring, and their behaviors. So, if we want to manifest something different, then we have to focus on changing the wiring within us that will create the action that will get those results. Okay. So, rewiring, is fundamental. The whole premises of this whole conversation is that permanent, transformation. Transformation, does not happen unless the brain is rewired.
If we’re not consciously reinforcing all of that, and we’re allowing our old triggers to take us back into our old patterns, then we were not going to grow new neural pathways. They’re going to be in a permanent place that’s going to create new, autopilot behavior.
Myrna: So, I know what you’re saying. That’s why they’re saying that motivation is so good because you’re excited for a second, and there’s no deep, transformation. Right, exactly. So, I know that you know, in our conversation, that you have a quiz that people can do to get this process started of, rewiring the brain, so you want to talk about it now.
Bob: Yeah, so the very first question is does my behavior is dictated by my wiring? I want to rewire how do I begin, right, like that makes sense. So, to really effectively, rewire the brain, you need to know where your current wiring is, so that you can recognize it when it’s at play. And then you can consciously override it. That is the process that’s required here. We’re going to need to consistently override the old wiring, old thought process.
We’re going to need to physically take different actions, we’re going to have to consciously make new meaning, but for us to be able to do that we have to be able to see that we’re on, autopilot, in the first place. So that’s where I created this quiz. And it’s called the, transformation personality type quiz. So, it’s not your typical, personality type, that’s out there in the corporate world. This is something I totally created just for myself based on my own experience. 20 years of dealing with people who are trying to transform that they fall into one of these or more one or more of these four types, personality types, when it comes to, personal transformation.
So, there’s nothing wrong with any of these types. And just because you are one of these types, it doesn’t mean that you’re going to sabotage or slow your efforts. However, if you are a person who has been working on this for a while, and it seems like it should be here by now, then this is this is something you can do to try to figure out what behaviors might I have in going that are stopping me?
So, the quiz identifies the, personality type. It explains the behaviors that type has that can cause self-sabotage, and then offers very specific things you can do instead. So, I invite anybody reading this, it only takes 60 seconds to take the quiz and it’s free. They can go to www.TPTquiz.com. Just as multiple choice they’ll know their type. They’ll have a video they can watch. They there’s a PDF they’ll get that explains more about their type and then what they can do about it.
But we can also talk about briefly, you know the four types here so that they if they do take the quiz, then they can you know, they can understand that we’re talking about them.
Myrna: Okay, briefly, what are what are the four types?
Bob: So, let’s assume that they went in took the quiz and now they’re back. Now the number one type most popular is the, seeker type.
The Seeker Brain
The, seeker type, is a person who is very committed to their, personal transformation. They really want the best in their life. And so, to do that, they try everything that comes along. There’s nothing wrong with having that kind of wild enthusiasm and curiosity. However, if you’re trying to implement something, a process, a new way of thinking, a structured way of thinking that is going to create wiring in your, brain, you got to stay consistent.
You can’t just keep flip flopping from approach to approach you’re giving your brain no time to grow anything. Remember it’s a biological process that starts with thought and intention and consent continues with consistency.
Number two – the skeptic, obviously wants the best in their life, but maybe they’ve been burned a few times with this when things didn’t show up the way they thought and they made that mean that oh nothing really works. So, the skeptic, while committed to, transformation, generally looks at an opportunity for change. And the question they have internally is, why won’t this work for me?
And when you ask yourself or the universe a question like that, you’re going to get those answers. If you ask the different questions, you’ll get different answers. So, the same skeptical person who is a, skeptic, they don’t want to be duped. They want to be intellectual and logical about this can ask a different question, get different results, and then actually allow themselves to take action. And it’s just the opposite of the question they automatically ask.
So instead of saying, why won’t this work for me, they asked How could this work for me? And leave us all their intellect in logic and see how I could work? Because if they keep asking themselves the wrong question, they’ll never take action. They’ll get to be right about how it will work because they’ll never get a result. And the law and the logical the skeptical, brain, likes to be right they don’t want to look stupid.
The next personality type is – the wizard. The Law of Attraction, community feels, the skeptic, is all logic and the, wizard, is all invisible trust and magic. Rituals, vision boards, the list, visualization, they’re just conjuring mentality like I’m using the, law of attraction, to change the energy of the universe so that they will do my bidding, rather than changing themselves. This is where the, alchemy, needs to begin. And then the universe will respond to you, you have to be a cause.
So, the wizard, brain, and all of their rituals helps it’s what you were talking about. There is the energy, there is the, vibration. All this stuff is happening. It’s sending stuff out there, if you will, but it also needs to be affecting who you are being in the world. You cannot just sit cross legged and be your, wizard, in your cave and not show the world how you are now this new person.
So, the wizardry, brain, needs to be around visioning yourself as this ultimate, wizard. you that’s what you’re conjuring, not the stuff, not the money, you’re conjuring the best version of who will take the action to get those things.
The Heartbreaker Brain
The last one is the – heartbreaker, brain. The, heartbreaker, is the, people pleaser. And the, people pleaser, is someone who really wants to transform and I know that this happens for a lot of people. They stop their progress when the people around them start to get uncomfortable. Start to comment, what are you doing, who do you think you are? Or in some other way, add a negative layer of emotion to your journey.
And so, for whatever your reasons you stop, whether it’s to make them comfortable, yourself comfortable or whatever, you stop your journey. Now, a lot of times it is so that mom will be uncomfortable. You won’t make that person mad. You’re trying to keep everybody comfortable.
Transform your Mind Podcast Index
Neuroplasticity of the brain
Myrna: All right. How does, neuroplasticity, fit in into, rewiring the brain? Can you make the connection for us?
Bob: Well, neuroplasticity, is the brain’s ability to rewire. So, in essence, it’s the same thing. So, neuroplasticity, there’s a there’s neurogenesis or the ability to grow new brain cells and all those other things, and then, neuroplasticity, which is the ability for it to change. And that’s really all we’re focused on. There’s a lot of people out there in the community, the personal development communities, we’re talking about the, brain, now who might have been talking to, law of attraction, before I’m not the only one.
And a lot of these people will go very deep into the parts of the, brain, and how this is all happening. Personally, I’m intentionally not doing that because I’m afraid that what’s going to happen is people are going to get focused on that again, just like they were all, the law of attraction, stuff. We weren’t meant to have to understand all of us.
We weren’t born into this human experience with all this amazing creative potential that we have needing to know all the ins and outs of the biology and how it works. We don’t need to know that. All we need to know is that this right here is a reality creation machine. And all we need to do is feed it the vision that we want for ourselves and then move and act and be in alignment with the person who would have that vision and it will all just take care of itself.
But we are adults and just waking up to this we have to understand we have a lifetime wiring a lifetime and it doesn’t seem like wiring. It just seems like our truth. And so, anything radically outside of our truth, we’re going to have conflict with it. It doesn’t fit into our normal paradigm. But we can look past that and see that in the world.
There are people who have the success and the things that we want. It is possible but they are being something different. You don’t have to be them. But there is certain action that they’re taking, certain ways of being that they are that have brought them those results. It’s not magic. It’s the result of logical action that you’re taking.
Rewiring the brain on autopilot
Myrna: You said something earlier that I want to connect the dots, because you’re talking about, rewiring the brain, but that can also be the same thing as, reprogramming. And we’re all programmed, by the time we’re seven years old, in order to be erase the tape, then we have to, rewire the brain. So, once they take the quiz and then become conscious of their programming. Because 95% of people are not conscious of their programs.
The, Law of Attraction, is working all the time, consciously or unconsciously. What are you thinking? What do you say? I don’t want this. That’s what’s going to show up. What do you say I want this, maybe sometimes it shows up. Whatever is happening to us is that we’re recreating it. So, talk a little bit about, autopilot.
Bob: Well, autopilot, if we do not wake up to our wiring to see that we are in fact program. We can probably see some program behavior, we do rituals every day and so on, but how we make meaning out of our lives and how that causes us to take action or not take action. If we don’t wake up to that then we are by default on, autopilot, which means we’re literally robots just reacting to stimuli based on the wiring that we’ve the programming that we’ve been given that we have mostly, subconsciously, just led in without too much critical thinking or evaluating.
So now everything we’re doing is on, autopilot, for the most part, even though sometimes it feels like we’re making a conscious decision. What is driving that decision? It’s probably some, unconscious wiring, that hasn’t been properly evaluated, especially if it is in some way limiting you from moving forward toward your dreams. So, we’re all running on some sort of, autopilot, until we realize that we are and start being conscious about it.
So, then we get conscious about it for a while, long enough for new neural pathways to form and now we have a new, autopilot, and that, autopilot, is manifesting on a different level. It’s creating different results because we visualize what we need to do. We take that action, we make different meaning, we don’t buy into old limiting stories. So much of a part of this is giving up all of our old stories.
Beliefs and the Brain
Myrna; The old stories, you’re talking about beliefs?
Bob: Beliefs, like my dad did this, or I’ve lived here and I didn’t have this and bla bla bla all the reasons, all the sad stories. And the thing is this, yeah, if you keep hanging on to those, beliefs, you will always be a prisoner of them. You have to let them go and tell yourself a new story. Because most of what you’re telling yourself in this story that is affecting you and causing you to not take action, is a lie.
Anyway, its interpretation is something you made up based on some action that did occur. How you move forward in your life is something that you made up based on your wiring. So, we want to create wiring in the, brain, that moves you in the action that you need to take to get what you want.
Myrna: How can readers learn more about your program and what you offer. How you help people, rewire their brain?
Bob: Well, the quiz is a good front door to everything, because then we all know where we stand. I know how to help you, and you could use some assistance, so that is a good way to get it. After you take the quiz, you’ll learn about our boundless living challenge, which is where I do the work with people. It’s an online community. They have 45 days of new content every day that’s real short and concise. They know exactly what to do every day.
They have tools to deal with the emotional spikes that come with all of this rewiring process. They have coaching on a regular basis. All the things I know after 20 years of coaching people actually helps people make a change, isn’t it? If they just want to know more general stuff about me there’s www.meetBobdoyle.com that just my website, you can get to the quiz from there as well. And then you can also see how I coach and train and some of the other stuff that I’m doing.
The difference between a, princess, and a, queen, is that the, princess, is waiting on someone to come and save while the, queen, has the emotional maturity to know that she has to save herself and her people.
In this episode, Gina DeVee, author of the, Audacity to Be Queen, makes reference to, Queen Esther, in the bible story of how she used her influence with the King to save her people the Jews. She didn’t wait on a prince to save her, she learnt how to communicate with the King
Gina went from being a broke psychologist to a multi-million dollar women’s empowerment and lifestyle brand with Divine Living. She has dedicated her career to helping women connect spiritually, start profitable businesses, and create wealth from a feminine perspective. Some of those women include Jen Sincero, who (fun fact!) dedicated her book on money to Gina.
Her first book,The Audacity to be Queen, consolidates over 20 years of experience in transforming women’s lives through the deep spiritual and feminine wisdom of Queenhood.
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The, princess mentality, is tough for us women, because we’re read stories from a very young age and most the impressionable time about being a, princess. And how someone else is going to come save us that we will live happily ever after.
So, for us to get out of the, princess mentality, and develop the emotional maturity and the wisdom that a, queen, has, that life isn’t perfect. Life isn’t fair. It doesn’t mean it’s horrible, though. either. It’s just the way it is.
Gina: I grew up Christian and my book is not overtly Christian, but it is based on the, book of Esther, in the Bible. Jews know the story from the Bible, and for everyone else, it’s kind of a Cinderella story, basically, Esther, was the most unlikely candidate to become the, Queen, of Persia.
I was on a plane one day and reading the Bible. I happened to be reading the book of, Esther, that day, and it was the first time that it really leapt off the page. And I was like, this isn’t just Esther’s story. This is the story of every woman, on some level, maybe symbolically. We’ve all been orphaned, exiled, taken out of our comfort zone, and really had been prepared for such a time as this. And I just really saw it almost as the heroine’s journey of us all and started doing retreats and workshops on it. So really, the substance of my work is about being the, Queen, based on the character of, Esther’s story.
Myrna: You okay, so we got that from, Queen Esther. I was thinking you meant when a man calls his woman his, Queen.
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Gina: I go through a lot more in chapter four in my book, so if anyone wants the cool, Queen Esther, story from when I also realized is, you know, Esther, was under an enormous amount of pressure, she had to risk her life. The king didn’t know he had married a Jew, and so she had to reveal who she was, she could have gotten killed. And even under all these pressures, she maintains what the Scriptures say a pleasing disposition, aka positive.
Well, I’m Sicilian, so I can be kind of fiery. One of the things that I do in the book, I talk about the, archetype of Queen, really being our highest self. And then there’s all these other, archetypes, that can show up along the way. And as you pointed out, the, Bitch, is one of them. I think that what happens is I wrote about this in chapter three, growing up to feel safe. None of us grew up in functional families.
Let’s just be clear, there is a certain level of dysfunction in families, the way society set things up, we took either two routes, we took compliance, be the, good girl, do everything right, follow the rules, you know, or defiance. Either or both of them, keep us out of our true self. And so, what I found for myself is I lived so long as a perfect and Little Miss good girl, I was so compliant.
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That when I was done with being the, good girl, I did the pendulum swing into defiance. And it was because I still didn’t really feel like I had power. So, I would let these, bitchy comments, kind of blow out of my mouth when I was under stress or feeling cornered, because I didn’t know how to be an alliance. And so that’s one of the things that I teach in my book is about how we can really speak the truth in love. You don’t have to be a doormat; you don’t have to not have boundaries. And you don’t have to be this, bitch, about it either.
Myrna; All right, so I know exactly what you’re talking about. Because people are always talking to me about, tonality, where you know, it comes across very aggressive when I say something, but I don’t know how not to sound, bitchy, if I’m annoyed. But it doesn’t mean that I want to be a, bitch, it’s just my direct way of communicating. So, what you’re saying is that women can, say what they want to say that’s on their mind, but say, in a queenly way, is that what you’re saying?
Gina: Yes, exactly. You know, speaking the truth without love. It’s just brutal honesty. So, when you when you come from a place of love, you consider your needs, your desires, what it is that you’re looking to communicate and you deeply consider the other person also. And so, when you when you come from this place, what you’re saying might not be popular, it might not even be well received, but you will feel better about yourself because you will know that to the best of your ability you actually set up a win-win situation.
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Myrna: Okay, so that’s basically how you define a, bitch mode of communication. So that’s probably a good segue to talk about. The, archetypes, right. You said there’s four, archetypes:
The Princess
The martyr,
The saboteur
and the Queen.
So, explain, these, archetypes, and maybe give us an example of the, communication, in each them.
Gina: Sure, those are four I do write about many, many more in the book, “The Audacity to be Queen” but I think that we all can see ourselves when we are we self-sabotaging? When we are a, martyr.
Gina: The, princess mentality, is tough for us women, because we’re read stories from a very young age and most the impressionable time about being a, princess. And how someone else is going to come save us that we will live happily ever after. So, Princesses, think that there is this happily ever after in this perfect scenario and then becomes very confused and very distraught when it doesn’t happen and real life shows up.
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Myrna: One of the things I loved about, Queen Esther’s, story is she was pushed into this position, you know, to see to save her people. And she embraced it. I loved the fact that she knew how to talk to the king, right? She knew how to ask the King for what she wanted. I wrote that down her strategy for when I want to request anything from my husband. Queen Esther, says “if it pleases Your Highness” That is definitely, Queen, language.
I found that story very amazing that, Queen Esther, learned how to talk to her husband to get what she wanted. A lot of people, a lot of women, don’t want to give the man the respect in order to get what they want from him. So yeah, the, Queen, archetype is knowing how to communicate like a, queen.
All right so our topic today is, how can women cure to disease to please. Let’s talk about the, desire to please, and the, disease to please, and then how you go about teaching women to cure it?
Gina: So, codependency is really what we’re talking about here. It’s when we are just operating to get other people’s approval, love, admiration. And it’s not really a preference. It’s like when I was really codependent it’s like, it’s what I needed to feel safe in the world. And so, I was always monitoring what does someone else want? What do I need to say that’s going to make them happy, or it’s going to make them like me, or it’s going to be acceptable to them?
And so, too, oftentimes, modern day women are just terrified of what other people are going to think about them or what other people are going to say, and it stops them from being in the relationship they want to be in or starting the business they want to start or being invisible online. Or speaking their truth. Like there’s so much that the, disease to please, holds back someone’s truth, it’s going to keep them from their destiny.
So, really healing codependency and curing that so to speak in our lives, it’s one of the most courageous journeys a woman could be on, to stop needing other people’s permission or approval. And, you know, the more you give yourself permission, the more you approve of yourself, is going to be the way that you’re going to attract people who feel similarly and it’s the more freedom. It’s the only way you’re going to live a free life.
Myrna: Women always feel you know, when they have the, disease to please, is that they always feel being authentic and understanding there, personal power, is the way to not have to feel that you’d like to please whether it’s your children, whether it’s your man, it’s your boss, you know, wherever you feel that you the, desire to please, in order for you to get attention.
You talked about the feminine perspective. How are you differentiating that in being a, Queen?
Gina: Yes, well, one of the reasons why I love the, archetype of Queen, is because she’s not all feminine. She’s not a goddess. She is not a mermaid waiting for her, prince, to come save her. And she’s not all like, masculine, like I’m going to take the bull by the horns and I’m going to hustle and have massive action. The, Queen, is not like the, Tony Robbins, or Gary Vaynerchuk way of being in the world are like that empowered and masculine. The, Queen, has both male and female energy, there is masculine and feminine energy.
It’s just the western world is obsessed, addicted really to all things masculine. So, the difference is, masculine energy, which is all things logical, practical, predictable, linear, it’s about action. It’s about thinking. Those are all these masculine traits and ultimately, masculinity is about giving.
And then, femininity is about the, spiritual, the creative, the playful, the passionate, the nonlinear. It’s a circle, it’s about feeling not thinking, it’s about being not taking action. And ultimately, femininity, is about receiving.
All of us have seen people in positions of power, whether they’re male or female, be the ones giving is in control, you know, initiating, taking that action so that’s what we have thought of when we think of success, and it’s just a different age and a different time and particularly women need to get better at receiving a compliment, receiving well exceeded attention. Receiving good in your life and let him know there’s a time play and to be creative and relax, rather than always working, being productive, being effective, all that kind of stuff. So, you know, really getting clear that there is, masculine energy, and there is, feminine energy.
Myrna: that’s a good one because you’re right, women have a problem receiving. They have the, disease to please, because they always want to give and when it’s time to receive, they don’t know how to receive. I tell my daughter all the time, the same thing. We’ve got to learn how to receive.
Gina: So, no matter what you’re taught, most of us have been taught, money, doesn’t grow on trees. You have to work if you want more, money, you have to work harder. And it’s about work all the time. And make sure you save up for a down payment for a home and save, money, for retirement and all this logical linear stuff. And the, feminine energy, way is different.
That’s all the, masculine energy, and there’s nothing inherently wrong with it. It’s like a painting of one color. It’s one dimensional and there’s just other colors to choose from also. So, it’s not about not being, masculine, but it’s about incorporating the, feminine. So, the, feminine, way it’s going to be creative.
The, feminine, is like, do I even want to own my home? Maybe I would rather rent my home and have, money, to travel because that’s part of my value system. Or maybe it’s actually a smarter for me to take the, money, that I would put into a house was only going to make X amount over X number of years and put it into a different kind of investment that maybe didn’t exist when our parents or grandparents told us save for a down payment for a house or real estate.
You know, and so that’s the, feminine, approach of being more creative or spiritually guided or not so logical and linear but being circular and looking at other possibilities that might even be smarter.
Myrna: Yeah, I like the creative approach to this definitely right. Feminine energy, is definitely creative. We were built to create. So that is that is definitely, feminine energy. Yeah, so I like that. All right, so yeah, so is there anything else that you want to share that I didn’t ask you?
Gina: I think the thing to really keep in mind especially right now for everyone, I don’t know anyone that’s not reconsidering their life with everything that we’ve all been through. Everyone’s asking what am I doing with my life and you know reevaluating is this even where I want to live? Is this the relationship I want to be in? Is this the job I want? If you have a business, is this the way I want to be doing business?
I really do invite everyone to deeply explore what else is possible because the truth is, we’re not going back to the way it was before the pandemic. That world is an era and consciousness that is done and over. So, a new world opens up, it’s about new and expansion and expression and creative possibility.
So, if you’re yearning for something more, a better life, lean into that. If there’s desires that you used to put off and said, well, I’ll do that later when the kids go to college, or when I retire, when there’s enough time or money left over. What if you started with your desires, what if you prioritize yourself? What if you said no, what if you set a boundary when everyone’s used to you being so available?
Book Audacity to be Queen
The Audacity to be Queen
Myrna: How does everything that you teach circle back to being a, queen?
Gina: Yes. So, the book “The Audacity to be Queen” starts out about how the epic life is possible. Because we got to get back into dreaming. We got to get to especially as adults, we’ve gotten a lot of things knocked out of us our self-confidence, things haven’t worked out. And it can be really tempting to just sit on the sidelines, take it easy, play small, stay safe, you know, whatever that is, so we got to get back into dreaming event.
And then chapter two is on, spirituality, is your superpower. I’m too old to be working that hard anymore. It’s is time for us to really let Spirit and God come in and open us up for miracles, and we got to open up for big opportunities. The way that the Bible talks about my ways are higher than your ways and my thoughts are higher.
They say you can work hard, but not work smart. When you get the call of God in your plans and whatever, then you don’t have to do it. And then, when things don’t go your way, like being able to rely on, spirituality, first of all, that’s where faith comes in. And then we get into really exploring much more deeply the difference between, masculine energy, and, feminine energy, and what it actually means to be, feminine. It’s not just about lipstick and a manicure. It’s a whole skill set and way of being in the world.
And then in chapter four talks about like the ultimate, Queen, and how for all of us, this is such a time to be a, Queen. We have been prepared to, be of service to our people. So that’s the real foundation, we’re all meant to be queen and we’re in our lives, like what happened? Why are we not swinging? So, we got to look at some of the unconscious thoughts and beliefs about, self-sabotage, and the, disease to please, and the comparison trap and all of the lack of mind training that most of us have not had. And there’s a lot of tools and exercises in the book that really teach us the mind training.
Fear, can keep you on the sidelines. Sometimes you have to tell, fear, you are not welcome here and just, jump in. Sometimes it is a life-or-death situation like drowning, other times it is jumping in that job you are not sure of, jumping in the marriage even though you have doubts, jumping into taking that night class even though you don’t know how you will juggle child care and a full-time job.
First Corinthians 2:9 says, “However, as it is written:‘What no eye has seen, what no ear has heard, and what no human mind has conceived’ — the things God has prepared for those who love him.” But in order to experience what He has prepared for us, we have to, jump in.
When I was a young mother, my greatest, fear, was what would I do if my kids were drowning. Would I, jump in, to save them even though I didn’t know how to swim?
I quieted that, fear, by taking a swimming class at the YWCA and also making sure that my children learned to swim. Both my children are strong swimmers and can swim in the ocean. My skills are limited to the pool.
But I recently heard a story that made my blood run cold. At a church picnic by the river a young boy accidentally stepped into the deep end and went under water. Six other boys, jumped in, to save him. All six of them drowned; they never came back up. All six of them had parents watching who never, jumped in, to save them, because they didn’t know how to swim. So, I am asking you this question. If you don’t how to swim would you, jump in, to save your child?
So many times, we are faced with this decision in life should I, jump in, and trust God to take my hand and bring me out? Or do I let, fear, keep me on the side lines? Sometimes it is a life-or-death situation like drowning, other times it is jumping in that job you are not sure of, jumping in, the marriage even though you have doubts, jumping into taking that night class even though you don’t know how you will juggle child care and a full-time job.
How many women did not accept that marriage proposal in their 20s because you were afraid to, jump in, and today you are alone because you never got another proposal? If you had, jumped in, God may have taken your hand and allowed you to navigate the rough waters. My husband proposed to me after 11 months and I decided to, jump in, and quiet the negative thoughts that told me you should date for 2 years before getting married because people show their true colors after 2 years. This month is out 16-year wedding anniversary. God has held my hand through the rough times.
Moses, Jeremiah and Gideon jumped in the deep end of God’s will, and God did amazing works through each of them.
Jump in and tell the Devil to get behind you
Look the Devil in the eye and tell him get behind me Satan, not today. You are not keeping me on the sidelines rooted in fear. I am jumping in.
Allowing the, fear, of “what if” to mess with our mind and rule our heart will smother your confidence and courage with an avalanche of doubt.
Fear, has no choice but to leave the premises when we stand on God’s promises and say, “You are not welcome here.” I am, jumping in, and trusting God.
Tell the Devil “You can’t have my peace; you can’t have my family”
If you are fearful, jump in.
If you get in the water this is where healing takes place. If you get in the water God will show up.
You have to learn how to hold on to something that is broken until you get to the next level.
Stay afloat by just kicking your feet. Refuse to go down, just keep kicking.
Refuse to do the backstroke. You are never going back to feeling like that. You are never going back to loneliness. Don’t be afraid of the water. God has not given you a, spirit of fear.
Kanye West’s mother Donda built up her son’s, self confidence, by speaking life into him. She told him “If you are a giant, you can’t see yourself when you look in the mirror”
In this episode of, 5 min Fridays with Coach Myrna, I want to teach on, self-confidence, and use the Netflix documentary of, Kanye West, as the background story.
Kanye West, grew up poor in Chicago and started rapping at a young age. He started producing beats in his teens and created beats for legends like Jayz and others. But his vision was to be a rapper and nobody would give him a record deal as a rapper, because he was labeled a producer. His mother Donda kept speaking to his, confidence, she kept building him up by telling him he was great.
She told him “If you are a giant, you can’t see yourself when you look in the mirror”
That was a powerful statement and Kanye used that as his fuel to keep pushing and he finally got that record deal with Roc-A-Fella records, but he still had to push to get his first album released. The album was an immediate hit topping the charts at #1 and he was nominated for 10 Grammys. Kanye West, is now on his way to becoming the richest black man in America.
Kanye West mother spoke life into him by calling him a giant
Kanye’s, confidence, was stroked by his mother. She told him he was a genius and a, giant, and he started walking and talking like a, giant. It all started with his mother Donda watering his dreams and building his, confidence, until according to, Kanye, his brain became too big for his head. That was his explanation for his battle with, mental illness.
Let’s look at that statement a, giant, looks in the, mirror, and sees nothing.
Self-confidence, is looking at yourself and knowing that you are crushing it. Whatever it is but if you lack, self-confidence, when you look in the, mirror, you see nothing; there is no reflection of beauty. You see failure, you see your flaws, you see not enough. What, Kanye West Donda, was saying to, Kanye, was that he was so great that he couldn’t comprehend it and so couldn’t see it when he looked in the, mirror.
That is the most powerful builder of, self-confidence, I had ever heard because from then on whenever, Kanye, doubted himself, he would remember his mother’s words that he just couldn’t see his greatness because he was bigger than even the, mirror.
We are all giants and limitless
We can all be, giants, because we are limitless. We can become anything we want, but what holds us back is feeling small when we look in the, mirror. The people of Israel saw themselves as, grasshoppers, they saw themselves small and insignificant. Remember, Kanye West Donda, words a, giant, looks in the, mirror, and sees nothing, so keep pushing until the, mirror, catches up to your vision.
Parents remember to speak into your children’s lives. Richard Williams spoke into Venus Williams and Serena Williams lives. He told them that they will become the best in game of tennis. He told them that they are future champions and they would win Wimbledon and they believed and came into agreement. Serena Williams did become the greatest in the game of tennis.
I speak into my children’s lives all the time. Sometimes they come into agreement and sometimes they feel that because I am mom, that I should say these things. Don’t worry if they don’t look like they are accepting your vision. Remember the movie Inception. All you are doing is planting seeds, when the time comes, that seed will become a forest.
So, keep speaking life into your children, into your spouse, into yourself. Tell yourself that when a, giant, looks in the, mirror, he sees nothing so if you don’t see anything it is because you are a, giant! Everyone sees the, giant, except you.
Conclusion
This is life coach Myrna Young and you are listening to, 5 min Fridays with coach Myrna. I want to invite you to join my Facebook group called Lifecoach for daily inspiration. Until next time Namaste
In his book A new way of life, Author Samy Barnat talks about life after crises. He discusses the, climate change crisis, water crisis, economics crisis, war crisis, pandemic crisis and , oil degradation crisis.
Samy Barnat is the author of A New Way of Life: Be the Solution to the Crises we Face: Increasing Deaths from Climate Change, Lack of Water and Food, Economic Crises, Fake Democracy, Risk of War, and Future Pandemics.
Samy Barnat is an independent multidisciplinary researcher in human sciences. His multi-disciplinary background (psychology, politics, economics, philosophy) gives him a rare global vision that many experts lack. His independent research incorporates outside the box thinking. Both precious elements for finding global solutions to the global crises we face.
The soil fertility crisis
Samy: If you have the best, mindset, but your environment is toxic, and we have a toxic society, that’s kind of a big problem.
Is there a job for everybody?
It’s a simple question, you can have the best, mindset, possible but if the economy is structured in a way that there is not a job for everybody and we have little money, you’re going to be stressed. Or if you are constantly having anxiety of being fired. It’s also the way the environment is being destroyed, the, crises, is we are destroying our environment. Very few people know that, soil fertility, is a growing problem. The, soil, is being destroyed by the way we do agriculture now.
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Myrna: Yeah, I have just become aware of #savesoil, Sadhguru is traveling 30,000 KLM to promote, save soil. I interviewed a member of his team a couple weeks ago. Yeah, we’re talking about food. We’re going to talk about your book, A New Way of Life, later on. How is politics and Philosophy connected?
Samy: Everything is kind of connected. That’s something I think we are all starting to realize that everything is kind of connected. Your mental health is connected to politics and economics, because if you don’t have enough money, you’re going to get stressed and if the environment is not fueling growth, you are going to be stressed.
If you are worried that your kids are not going to have a good future, because you can’t afford their education, you are going to be stressed. That is why politics and Philosophy are connected. It takes leaders like Sadhguru to increase awareness.
Myrna: I see what you mean, because the politicians are directing our future. Whether it’s health care, getting rid of student loans or price of oil. I thought you were saying that politicians, use psychology to get us to vote for them.
Samy: Absolutely, you’re totally right and in a very manipulative way.
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Myrna: I like what you said about having a, healthy mindset, is very important for, personal development. Personal development, is a big topic. I’m in the, personal development, space and the, mindset, space. The mind dictates everything. What we believe dictates our level of development, because most people don’t do the work to control their, mind. What is a healthy mindset? How does our, mindset, control anxiety and stress?
Samy: The idea is simple. It’s just we have, positive emotions. And it’s very important to understand this. I mean science it’s only about principles. When you study science, you study principles, it’s like the laws of nature and gravitation in physics. Our, emotions, have their own loads which were created by God.
You have, positive emotions, when your, desires, are realized. And you have, negative emotions, when your, desires, are not realized. So, for example, a baby cries because a, desire, of food is not realized. As an adult if you have an objective, to study and to pass an exam and you fail the exam, you have, negative emotions. You can find as many examples as you want; but the essence it’s about, desire. So, as a result, we have to be extremely careful what we, desire, because if we have impossible, desires, we suffer from anxiety and stress.
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So first of all, we have to be careful what we, desire. We need to make sure we have, realistic desires, all the time, so many people don’t do that. It’s better to reduce your objective. So at least you will be in peace emotionally. You know what I mean? Because you don’t want to be suffering all the time. We should question everything in the light of this principle, ambition.
And deeper than that, it’s our personality, and that I think so many people need to hear this. So basically, our, personality, or what so many of us call our, personality. It’s kind of a, desire, which we were told.
So, for example, so many people, they have a, desire, to be the best and they think that’s who I am. I want to be the best. I’m the best, they have this, internal dialogue. It’s a program really, it’s an, unconscious program. And it was taught by their parents as a kind of a, life strategy. If you try to be the best, at least you can get the best job, the best partner etc.
They don’t realize that a, type A personality, is actually the cause of their pain. If your, desires, are not realized, you have, negative emotion. So, if you try to always be the best, it’s just impossible. So, every time you’re going to feel like you’re not the best, you’re going to feel sadness, stress, anxiety. It’s kind of a, crises, of constant stress, and you don’t understand why. You don’t know where it comes from. It actually coming from what you call your, personality.
But it’s not your, personality. As a human being you are able to recreate yourself all the time, to adapt all the time. So, you should absolutely not cling on to an, unhealthy desire, which is to be the best. This is a, crises.
Myrna what you are doing is very helpful in the, personal development, space. It’s about, NLP, neuro linguistic programming, which is simply, reprogramming our mind. It simply reprogramming with new words, new desires, a new personality, etc. Like saying no, I’m not always the best, sometimes I’m weak, I’m not always clever, sometimes I am stupid.
Myrna: So basically, it’s about, reprogramming our mind with, affirmations.
Book A new Way Of Life solutions to the crises we face
A New Way of Life A solution to the crises we face
We have a lot of crises So, tell us what solutions you offer in your book?
Samy: Okay, so yeah, so, basically, I’ll start with what I think are the most urgent, crises, and then we can move on from there. So, the, soil degradation, crisis, it’s something we hear so little about in the media. It’s so important because the way we do agriculture is actually destroying the, soil. So, in the world you have a lot of places where this desertification has started.
So, the soil is becoming sand. It’s not very productive in terms of food, and that’s a big deal. A, crisis, will start to emerge in a more dramatic way. We are all going to be affected by that. We cannot just rely on our politicians to take care of these big issues.
We’ve seen it with, climate change, for example. They knew about, climate change, for 30 years, and they have done very little because of the lobbyists who put pressure on politicians and big corporations like Exxon. They don’t want to do anything about, climate change, because it was going to make them lose money.
The other, crisis, we need to worry about is the end of the end of, oil. Our life is based on, oil. Food is produced with, oil, agricultural machines need, oil. Everywhere in the world, more than 60% of the population were working as farmers. So that gives you an idea of society before, oil.
Oil, is everywhere, all the products, almost the job of everybody is completely relying on, oil. All the products are imported with, oil, for trucks, and boats from the other side of the world. And that includes food or whatever you sell, whatever your company’s selling, it’s relying on, oil, so when we go towards the end, it means it basically means the collapse of the economy.
Myrna: I understand about the, soil, because they are depleting the nutrients of the, soil. And the soil is becoming sand. I don’t understand an, oil crisis, because, oil, is supposed to be limitless. Why are you saying that we’re going to run out of it?
Samy: So, you know, all resources are limited. I mean, half our planet is finite. It’s limited.
Myrna: Oil, is all over the place. All you got to do is dig. They just found, oil in Guyana. Apparently, you can go dig in your backyard and might find, oil.
Samy: Okay, so you can see the graph showing discoveries. The peak of discoveries was quite a long time ago. So, it means since that time, we discover every year less and less, oil. We still discover some, but the question is, is it going to be enough for the global economy? It’s a question of quantity.
Myrna: Politicians are looking at ways to not use, oil. They’re looking at energy efficient ways. So that’s what they’re starting because maybe they know that maybe in 30 years or something, the, oil, will be depleted. But I personally think that we live in an abundant world, that everything that we need is right here, and it’s not limited.
Samy: Yeah, so the, oil crises, I’m speaking about, the data came from people working in BP, and Shell Exxon. They give me numbers about when we will reach the end of, oil. You can you can check this on internet because those reports are for free. But it gives us a rough estimation, the end of, oil, would be around 30 years around 2050. But what we should worry about is the end of, cheap oil, because even if we still have, oil, if it becomes too expensive then that it is the end and society collapses.
For example, we’ve seen now in Spain, it gives us a glimpse of the future. Because of the, war with Russia, the supply of oil in Europe is limited. Okay, so in Spain, what happened is that truck drivers, the oil increased so much that they could they couldn’t earn a living. They basically had more charges, compared to earnings, so they stopped working.
Myrna: it was happening in the US too. A lot of truck drivers protested at the Canadian border for same reason, gas prices too high. The diesel fuel is twice that of regular gas.
Samy: This gives us a glimpse into the future, the end of, cheap oil, will affect our lives. Oil, is the basis of modern society.
Myrna: Okay, all right. So that’s a good reason for people to get your book. So, do you offer solutions in your book? What was the reason you wrote the book, and what do you want people to walk away with after reading your book?
Samy: So basically, it’s about preparing your family. I’m saying the first thing you should worry about is your family. In France, there’s much more awareness on this topic and many people they have started to buy land. You need land because when society collapses it is going to be violent. When you don’t have food, people fight.
The second solution would be to have your local community prepare for the, oil crisis. So, it’s kind of the solution I’m giving in the book. So basically, what I’m saying is we need a new way of doing politics.
Conclusion
Myrna; All right, tell people where they can get your book so they can get your solutions to all these, crises.
Samy: So basically, if you go on https://samybarnat.com/ you will find links to all social media and the book, so you can you can just get there.
Myrna: Okay, all right. Okay. All right. So yes, and of course, the book is available on Amazon. So yeah, it’s me. It’s been we had a really good conversation and we covered a multitude of topics. I specifically love your take on why people are happy or unhappy. Thank you.
The men went out and explored the land for 40 days and came back with their report. The land is indeed flowing with, milk and honey, here is a sample of their crops, but we can’t take the land because the people living there are, giants, we are like, grasshoppers, next to them.
In the bible story of the, promised land, The lord said to Moses send your men to explore the land I am giving you. It is a land flowing with, milk and honey.
So, Moses sends out 12 men, all tribal leaders with these instructions Find out:
What kind of people live there? Are they strong or weak, few or many?
How do they live. Did they live in tents or in a fortified city with walls,
The men went out and explored the land for 40 days and came back with their report. The land is indeed flowing with, milk and honey, here is a sample of their crops, but we can’t take the land because the people living there are, giants, we are like, grasshoppers, next to them.
Two of the 12 men had a different report, they said the land is indeed rich, flowing with, milk and honey, and we can take the people, because the lord is with us and they will be helpless prey to us because they do not have the protection of God. Do not be afraid of them. They are not, giants.
This bible story illustrates fear of the unknown, the inability to take what the lord has already given you.
This episode is brought to you by The Jordan Harbinger Show.
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The average podcast listener has 6 shows in rotation, so you’re most likely not just listening to The Transform Your Mind podcast — and that’s totally okay! In fact, I’d love to share a podcast to add to your list:
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Do you see yourself as a grasshopper or powerful like Gandhi
Do you see, giants, and feel like you are a, grasshopper, that will be crushed if you move forward with your goals and desires? What’s keeping you from your promised land or destiny?
Let’s look at, Gandhi. Gandhi, was a small frail man who looked like a grasshopper, the giant he faced was the British Empire and, colonialism. This small, gentle man, a Hindu who also studied other faiths, gave birth to the concept of non-violent resistance for social change. In his native India, Gandhi, was instrumental in ending, British colonialism, fighting the, caste system, and improving women’s rights.
The caste system explained,
The caste system, is deeply rooted in the Hinduism belief in karma and reincarnation.
Dating back more than 3,000 years, the, caste system, divides Hindus into four main categories – Brahmins, Kshatriyas, Vaishyas and the Shudras based on who they were in their past life, their karma, and what family line they come from. Many believe that the system originated from Brahma, the Hindu God of creation, believing that the Brahmins represent the eyes and mind of Brahma and are therefore often teachers and priests, the Kshatriyas represent his arms and are often warriors, the Vaishyas represent his legs and are often farmers or merchants, and the Shudras represent his feet and are often laborers.
Gandhi on Non violence
His unique non-violent approach would become a pivotal part of movements throughout the world, from the Civil Rights Movement in the U.S. to the fight against apartheid in South Africa. Did, Gandhi, feel like a, grasshopper? Did he see the British as a, giant? NO. He had no fear.
Go after your goals and desires, God has already given them to you.
The lord told the people of Israel I have given you the, promised land, a land flowing with, milk and honey. He did not tell them they had to fight, giants, for it. God has already given you the victory, yet you see, giants, and don’t, go get it.
I remember reading Dwyane Wade’s autobiography and he said that he saw Michael Jordon at his first all-star game and Jordan told him, go get it, he didn’t know what he meant at the time, but later he realized he meant “go get the MVP. The MVP was already there waiting for him, God had already given it to him, all he had to do was, go get it.
Same with your dreams and goals God has already given it to you; you just have to, go get it. You are not a, grasshopper, no perceived, giants, can crush you. Remember if you are a believer, you have the protection of God on your side and the opposition will be helpless prey because they have no protection.
So become fearless and go get what God has already given you. There are no, giants, and you are not a, grasshopper but, strong and courageous.
GRASSHOPPER CHARACTERISTICS
Grasshoppers, are medium to large insects. Adult length is 1 to 7 centimetres, depending on the species. Like their relatives the ‘katydids’ and ‘crickets’, they have chewing mouthparts, two pairs of wings, one narrow and tough, the other wide and flexible, and long hind legs for jumping. They are different from these groups in having short antennae that do not reach very far back on their bodies.
Grasshoppers, usually have large eyes, and are colored to blend into their environment, usually a combination of brown, grey or green. In some species the males have bright colors on their wings that they use to attract females. A few species eat toxic plants, and keep the toxins in their bodies for protection. They are brightly colored to warn predators that they taste bad.
Nobody should want to be a, grasshopper, or call themselves a, grasshopper. It means that anyone can crush you. As a man thinketh so is he. If you see yourself as a grasshopper, then people will see you as such and proceed to step on you.
This is coach Myrna Young and you have been listening to 5 min Fridays with coach Myrna. I want to invite you to join my Facebook group called Lifecoach. Until next time Namaste
Saying yes to your, demons, is how you get rid of them. Demons, feed on, negative energy, and, conflict. So just accept them and tell yourself if you ignore them they will go away.
There is an ancient story of a, monk, who leaves his cave to gather firewood and when he comes back, he finds his cave filled with, demons. They had taken over the joint. His first thought is I got to get rid of these guys, so he tries pushing them out, fighting them, lunging at them but the, demons, were unphased.
The more he tried to get rid of them, the more they settled in.
His next approach was to teach them the, dharma, and make them leave on their own.
He teaches them about, impermanence, nonphysical and physical, compassion etc. but they just stared at him with wide eyes understanding nothing.
He realized that these, demons, could not be manipulated to leave so he resigned himself and decided to find out what they were there to teach him. As soon as he accepted these, demons, most of them bow and dissolve except one.
There is always one fierce, demon, that sticks around that is difficult to get rid of. So, he walks up to this, demon, and said “you win, just eat me” and he sticks his head in its mouth and that, demon, dissolves also. The moral of the story.
The, demons, leave when you stop fighting and say yes.
How many of you can relate to this story? You are, conflict, with your spouse, your boss or best friend. You are trying to convince them of your point of view but the more you try to debate the issue the more they settle in on their point of view.
So, finally you say to yourself I give up you win and the second head on your spouse vanishes!
The, monk, even tried to teach the, demons, the, Dharma, and about, impermanence, because they felt they were still alive.
Buddha, had three essential teachings called the, Dharma Seals. These three teachings of the, Buddha, are:
Impermanence,
no self and
nirvana.
For instance, our body is visibly impermanent and getting older every day, and yet this is something we don’t want to accept. Certain popular magazines that cater to youth and beauty exploit this attitude. In terms of view, meditation and action, their readers might have a view — thinking in terms of not aging or escaping the aging process somehow. They contemplate this view of permanence, and their consequent action is to go to fitness centers and undergo plastic surgery and all sorts of other hassles.
Enlightened beings would think that this is ridiculous and based on a wrong view. Regarding these different aspects of, impermanence, getting old and dying, the changing of the weather, etc., Buddhists, have a single statement, namely this first seal: phenomena are impermanent because they are compounded. Anything that is assembled will, sooner or later, come apart.
Nirvana, is a place of perfect peace and happiness, like heaven. In Hinduism and, Buddhism, nirvana is the highest state that someone can attain, a state of enlightenment, meaning a person’s individual desires and suffering go away.
Just as all-important legal documents have the mark or signature of a witness, all genuine practices of the, Buddha, bear the mark of these three teachings.
Teaching impermanence to demons
If we look into the first, Dharma Seal, impermanence, we see that it doesn’t just mean that everything changes. By looking into the nature of things, we can see that nothing remains the same for even two consecutive moments. Because nothing remains unchanged from moment to moment it therefore has no fixed identity or a permanent self.
So in the teaching of, impermanence, we always see the lack of an unchanging self. We call this “no self,” the second Dharma Seal. It is because things are always transforming and have, no self, that freedom is possible.
When you are fighting, demons, it is easy to say “I give up, eat me” because they feed on the energy of, conflict, fear, and, negative thoughts, just remember another ancient saying “this too shall pass” the, demons, only stay if you fight them.
What can our, demons, teach us? Every, conflict, is here to teach us something.
If you are in a relationship and someone is always pushing your buttons, then that is an opportunity for growth. This, demon, is here to teach you to have an, internal locus of control. When you have peace inside, no one can deliberately push your buttons. You will find that the, demon, dissipates when you don’t react or respond. It is no fun trying to steal your peace if you don’t lose your peace. Practice not reacting to the, demon, just say yes and they will leave you alone.
Say This too shall pass, everything is impermanent.
Thanks for listening to this week’s episode of 5 min Fridays with coach Myrna
