How to Build Multiple Passive Income Streams

building multiple income streams

Looking for, passive income streams, for retirement? Jack Gibson, President of High Return Real Estate, shares how to use real estate to build passive income.

Today’s episode in the 3rd in our series on building wealth with Real Estate investments.  My intention is to sow seeds into your subconscious that 2019 is the year to build your net worth. The power of intention is an invisible force of energy in the Universe. It is activated when we become inspired and will propel us towards our goals.

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  • Guest Biography

Jack Gibson began his entrepreneurial journey at 19, and founded his first company at the ripe old age of 21. Operating a successful nutrition consulting and distribution company.  He had built a multi-million dollar venture before he was old enough to rent a car. Soon thereafter, he bought his first home as an investment. One home quickly became five, and then the bug hit. He became obsessed with learning everything about Real Estate Investing and soon had over 50 investment properties generating Massive amounts of passive income. Today, Jack spends his time mentoring other entrepreneurs, building his real estate investment portfolio, and helping other investors to build a brighter future through the power of turnkey real estate income.

 

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Show Notes

My very first business that I started at age 19 was  a multi-level marketing nutrition distribution business.  The whole goal of that business was to build up a sales team and create ongoing, passive streams of income, so  I got that concept right away. I built that business up over the years and we currently have annual revenues over ten million dollars.  The last couple years it’s been a little bit more part-time or quite a bit more part-time as I pursued building my real estate company.

But I mean I still love it, I still love the people and I love the, passive streams of income,.  Two years into my network marketing company,  I read the book Rich Dad Poor Dad, that was the book that really transformed my mind to start thinking about utilizing real estate as a way to deploy the cash that I was making in my primary business and add additional, passive streams of income,.  I was still investing in stocks until about 4 years ago.  I was in stocks for most of the last 14 years, so about four years ago two events happened that were critical and really pushed me over into investing into real estate as another, passive streams of income,

There were two negative events,  but you know most negative events if we look back we can find the good in them.  One of them was I had some insider information, not anything illegal by any stretch,  I mean I knew that our company had a good earnings quarter.  I mean it wasn’t that hard to figure out based on what I heard from all my colleagues, so that’s kind of my insider information.

I bought into the stock about a week before the earnings report was to be released expecting things to be great.  Well the earnings report was phenomenal and typically, not always but typically stocks go up when the earnings report is great.  Well this  billionaire Hedge Fund investor was very well known as  an activist in terms of shorting stocks.  He gets on our company earnings call,  he asked  three or four pointed questions and then it appeared that he was shorting the stock;  the stock drops 30% overnight.

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Stocks as a, passive streams of income,

I realized then that I didn’t have control over stocks. Not even a sure thing is guaranteed. I want to be in the driver’s seat and put myself in a great position where I have as much control over the outcome as possible.  I took that as my sign that this is my time to learn a new asset class and another, passive streams of income, it was the final push.  I told myself, I’m going to draw the line in the sand.  So I studied real estate and listened to podcasts for a hundred straight days.

Jack you know that someone listening is going to pay devil’s advocate and say the same thing happens in real estate.  What’s your come back on that?

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So here’s what we have to consider when looking at real estate as another, passive streams of income,  we look at the past.  I mean could go back 100 even you know 200 years or whatever, the variance between real estate and the stock market is almost four times different.  If you look at historical data,  the swing in the stock market is around a variance of 16 or so from year to year.  Real estate has a variance of four.  That means from year to year on average that the swing in the market is going to be four percent, so you’re not quite so volatile in real estate.

The other part in this, passive streams of income, scenario  is it that you’re  investing in the real estate as  Robert T. Kiyosaki says, for the cash flow that it produces.  Not necessarily for it to go up in value.  You really don’t care if it appreciates or depreciates. As an investor and you’re renting it out and you will always be able to rent it out for more than the mortgage payment.

 

At the same time  property values  will go up eventually, even if it dips for a little in the short term.  I was listening to the Automatic Millionaire Homeowner and the author was interviewing homeowners who lived in their homes for about 2 years and then sold and moved to bigger homes, and became millionaires because homes always go up in value.

We’ve discussed  real estate, we’ve talked about the stock market and we’ve also talked about multi-level marketing.  I understand why that’s been your foundation for, passive streams of income, because you’ve been you’ve been taught well.  You stayed in the business  for 20 years so you must be really doing well, because everybody that joins the business under you feeds you, passive streams of income,.

Multi-Level Marketing a Tool for generating, passive streams of Income,

Yea, it is phenomenal. If I could describe the business to people without saying what it was they’d be like wow that sounds too good to be true. I have a multi-million dollar business that I work right here from my home office.  That I help people with their health and nutrition. I have no employees, I have no accounts receivable.  I have no inventory, I have no monthly overhead whatsoever.  I have a free cash flowing business that produces ten to twelve million dollars in sales revenue per year.  That’s not obviously my income; but a percentage of that.

Skilled , passive streams of income: Writing a book, Music, software

That’s why, passive streams of income,  is so important.  On my website, www.myhelps.com  I talk about a some other forms of, passive streams of income,  like writing a book, or writing music.  Mariah Carey wrote the song “All I want for Christmas”  in 15 minutes. She’s generated sixty million dollars in royalties off of that 15 minute work.  So her, passive streams of income, is phenomenal.

Explain what we mean by, passive streams of income,  which ones would you recommend it to a seasoned investor or someone just starting out?

Passive income is created from work you have done in the past, that is paying you today.

You have one or two scenarios.  You either have money at work or capital at work and you’re drawing royalties. There’s multiple ways to go about creating, passive streams of income,  it boils down to either unskilled or skilled forms of passive income. It’s like what you talked about in terms of creating music and selling music, or writing a book, or creating a piece of software that you then are able to license out and sell.  Those are very technical skills, very skilled types of, passive streams of income,.

Creating, passive streams of income, from a business  I won’t say is unskilled in terms of work. It does it takes skills to put the right management team in place.  There’s a way you can have any type of business that you set up  to become a, passive income stream, if you’re not involved directly in day-to-day operations, then it’s a, passive income stream, business.

To listen to the full interview, download on iTunes and please subscribe and leave a review.

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Check out Jack on the web https://highreturnrealestate.com/.  All of our properties are listed on the website. Nicole is the Head of Investor Relations and she will be happy to answer any questions.

On the nutrition side,  we have a brand new system, it’s a nine week online body transformation Course that we’re planning on scaling so that over 10,000 people can participate. Check out Jack’s Body Transformation podcast 

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Additional Resources:

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25 Best Passive Income Ideas to Make Money in 2019

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How to Create a Freedom Lifestyle with Investment Property

Do You See Giants or Grasshoppers

Do you see Giants or Grasshoppers

The men went out and explored the land for 40 days and came back with their report. The land is indeed flowing with, milk and honey, here is a sample of their crops, but we can’t take the land because the people living there are, giants, we are like, grasshoppers, next to them.

In the bible story of the, promised land, The lord said to Moses send your men to explore the land I am giving you. It is a land flowing with, milk and honey.

So, Moses sends out 12 men, all tribal leaders with these instructions Find out:

  • What kind of people live there? Are they strong or weak, few or many?
  • How do they live. Did they live in tents or in a fortified city with walls,
  • Is the soil fertile or poor are there many trees?

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The Spies saw giants

The men went out and explored the land for 40 days and came back with their report. The land is indeed flowing with, milk and honey, here is a sample of their crops, but we can’t take the land because the people living there are, giants, we are like, grasshoppers, next to them.

Two of the 12 men had a different report, they said the land is indeed rich, flowing with, milk and honey, and we can take the people, because the lord is with us and they will be helpless prey to us because they do not have the protection of God. Do not be afraid of them. They are not, giants.

This bible story illustrates fear of the unknown, the inability to take what the lord has already given you.

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Do you see yourself as a grasshopper or powerful like Gandhi

Do you see, giants, and feel like you are a, grasshopper, that will be crushed if you move forward with your goals and desires?  What’s keeping you from your promised land or destiny?

Let’s look at, Gandhi. Gandhi, was a small frail man who looked like a grasshopper, the giant he faced was the British Empire and, colonialism. This small, gentle man, a Hindu who also studied other faiths, gave birth to the concept of non-violent resistance for social change. In his native India, Gandhi, was instrumental in ending, British colonialism, fighting the, caste system, and improving women’s rights.

The caste system explained,

The caste system, is deeply rooted in the Hinduism belief in karma and reincarnation.

Dating back more than 3,000 years, the, caste system, divides Hindus into four main categories – Brahmins, Kshatriyas, Vaishyas and the Shudras based on who they were in their past life, their karma, and what family line they come from. Many believe that the system originated from Brahma, the Hindu God of creation, believing that the Brahmins represent the eyes and mind of Brahma and are therefore often teachers and priests, the Kshatriyas represent his arms and are often warriors, the Vaishyas represent his legs and are often farmers or merchants, and the Shudras represent his feet and are often laborers.

Gandhi on Non violence

His unique non-violent approach would become a pivotal part of movements throughout the world, from the Civil Rights Movement in the U.S. to the fight against apartheid in South Africa. Did, Gandhi, feel like a, grasshopper? Did he see the British as a, giant? NO. He had no fear.

Go after your goals and desires, God has already given them to you.

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God has already given you your promised land

The lord told the people of Israel I have given you the, promised land, a land flowing with, milk and honey. He did not tell them they had to fight, giants, for it. God has already given you the victory, yet you see, giants, and don’t, go get it.

I remember reading Dwyane Wade’s autobiography and he said that he saw Michael Jordon at his first all-star game and Jordan told him, go get it, he didn’t know what he meant at the time, but later he realized he meant “go get the MVP. The MVP was already there waiting for him, God had already given it to him, all he had to do was, go get it.

Same with your dreams and goals God has already given it to you; you just have to, go get it. You are not a, grasshopper, no perceived, giants, can crush you. Remember if you are a believer, you have the protection of God on your side and the opposition will be helpless prey because they have no protection.

So become fearless and go get what God has already given you. There are no, giants, and you are not a, grasshopper but, strong and courageous.

GRASSHOPPER CHARACTERISTICS

Grasshoppers,  are medium to large insects. Adult length is 1 to 7 centimetres, depending on the species. Like their relatives the ‘katydids’ and ‘crickets’, they have chewing mouthparts, two pairs of wings, one narrow and tough, the other wide and flexible, and long hind legs for jumping. They are different from these groups in having short antennae that do not reach very far back on their bodies.

Grasshoppers, usually have large eyes, and are colored to blend into their environment, usually a combination of brown, grey or green. In some species the males have bright colors on their wings that they use to attract females. A few species eat toxic plants, and keep the toxins in their bodies for protection. They are brightly colored to warn predators that they taste bad.

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Conclusion

Nobody should want to be a, grasshopper, or call themselves a, grasshopper. It means that anyone can crush you. As a man thinketh so is he.  If you see yourself as a grasshopper, then people will see you as such and proceed to step on you.

This is coach Myrna Young and you have been listening to 5 min Fridays with coach Myrna. I want to invite you to join my Facebook group called Lifecoach. Until next time Namaste

Breaking Barriers On The Fresh Prince Of Bel Air

Daphne Maxwell Reid Breaking Barriers

Daphne Maxwell Reid, was one of the Black women to work on network television as Aunt Viv on the popular sitcom, Fresh Prince of Bel Air.  Reid says that they were a family and they continue to be great friends 30 years later.

Being among the first of a few black women to work in popular television reminds me that one doesn’t choose to be a pioneer,” she says today.  “One does what comes next in their journey, and sometimes you happen to be the first to do it and breakdown barriers.  I just happened to land in that slot of being first for some things – but being the first doesn’t mean anything if it doesn’t seed the growth of a lot more.

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Bio

Daphne Maxwell Reid, continues to thrive as a creative entrepreneur and artist, continuing to dazzle anyone who knows her with her bold spirit, grace, and work ethic. One of the first African-American women to make the cover of Glamour magazine and one of television history’s most beloved sitcom moms on, Fresh Prince of Bel-Air, Reid now balances her acting gigs with her work as a photographic artist, clothing designer, and education activist, demonstrating that it’s never too late to pursue new passions and find new opportunities.

Daphne worked in dozens of television series in the 1980s, guest starring in shows like “WKRP in Cincinnati” (where she first worked with her husband, Tim Reid, to whom she has been married since 1982), “Hill Street Blues,” and “Simon and Simon,” she first took a lead role on the acclaimed series “Frank’s Place,” opposite Tim.  But it was in the role of, Vivian Banks, in the last three seasons of “The Fresh Prince of Bel Air” with, Will Smith, that endeared Reid to a new generation of fans.

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Breaking barriers as Aunt Viv on Fresh Prince of Bel Air

Myrna: I know that you took on the role of, Vivian banks, in season four. Can you tell us your journey up until that point? And how did that role shape your life and allowed you to, break barriers?

Daphne: That’s Wow, it was another job. I had done a bunch of Back-to-Back series, including the one that you mentioned earlier Frank’s place, and Simon and Simon and Tim and I had worked a lot, and we were getting ready to move to Virginia. And in I think, it was 1989 that the show started being cast and my agent said, we’ve got a show for you to go read for it’s a half hour sitcom with a rap star and I said, No thank you.

So, we moved to Virginia, I saw the fall shows come on and there is the, Fresh Prince of Bel Air, and it was so cute. I said, oh, well, go on living doing other things. I was doing projects with McCall pattern company and QVC so I was busy. Three years later I get a call saying we want you to come and audition for the role of aunt Vivian on the, Fresh Prince, of Bel Air. So, I went and I, myself and 200 other women showed up. We had a casting session that went on about two weeks.

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Two of my favorite shows are:

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And about the third audition, I got to work with James Avery. And we clicked, I fell in love with that huggable, wonderful man. We remained friends the rest of his life. He and his wife and Tim and I used to travel together during the show when we were off and he was just a dream. I guess that chemistry sold because they hired me to go and become one of that wonderful family. We are truly a family of friends who have stayed in touch all these 30 years.

Myrna: I know it’s been 30 years because Will had he was 22 when the show started and I think he is 52 or older now.

Fresh Prince of Bel Air still popular 30 years later

Daphne: It’s been a while. It’s amazing that the show has such legs and we’re on our third generation of people who come up to me and say, you’re Aunt Viv. But you didn’t know back then, this was 30 years ago. You didn’t know what the reception of the audience was, except by the numbers that you get from the network. There was no social media and all that kind of stuff. So, we were just doing a show. We were having a lot of fun and we got good numbers.

So, they let us continue to do it. And the end of the fifth year, Will Smith, told us that we will only be doing one more season of the, Fresh Prince. He was doing movies. He’s an incredible businessman, and watching him grow from where I started with him to the man that he became, I just was very, very proud of him. So, six years we had our last episode of the, Fresh Prince, and we cried. But we all stayed in touch with each other. Yeah, so that’s beautiful.

Will Smith Slaps Chris Rock

Myrna: So, you and, Will Smith, are still friends did you talk to him after the Oscars? We have this situation the, Will Smith slap, heard around the world, I am so sorry for him. My heart goes out to him.  I’ve always admired him because of the huge movie star he’s become and I watched the, Fresh Prince of Bel Air. You know when it was on and the reruns.

So, I’ve always loved, Will Smith. When I read his book, “Will” I kind of understand where he was coming from. As soon as he slapped Chris Rock. I dropped right into that space about him not wanting to be a coward.  He starts off his book by talking about being a coward.

So, have you spoken to, Will Smith, since this episode about the, slap on the Oscars?  I don’t think he was ever violent. So, what is your opinion of all that slap?

Daphne: I have spoken to him and I don’t share my opinion. I love the man that’s all I have to say.

Myrna: Okay. All right. Well, that’s good. All right. So at least you’ve spoken to him probably offered him some condolences and all that. That’s good. All right. I respect that. One of the things I did before our talk is I went back and I looked at a couple of episodes of the, Fresh Prince, that you were in, so that I can talk to you about a few episodes. And it was really incredible that two of the top 10 episodes that you were in, talked about two things that, Will Smith, did later on in his life.

Will Smith bungee jumping at 50 years old

The first episode on the, Fresh Prince, I want to talk about was when Hillary was being proposed to her fiancé did the bungee jump and He splashed on the ground. And you had this great comeback on that by saying,

“The Lord giveth and the Lord taketh”

Do you want to talk about that episode? Why didn’t that scare the bejesus out of, Will Smith, why would he do, bungee jumping, on his 50th birthday?

Daphne: Probably because he wanted to face his fear of, bungee jumping. Watching National Geographic shows, you see that? He’s working his way through his, fears, and confronting them and getting over them and getting past them, encouraging people to do the same. So, I’m sure the bungee jump episode on the, Fresh Prince, was sadly funny. If it had happened to anybody that we knew that probably would not have been funny.

Myrna: What about your line “The Lord giveth and the Lord taketh away”. Do you have experience with that?

Daphne: Well, we know in life you win some, you lose some and it depends on how you handle either is where you go on your journey.

Myrna: That’s true. Okay, good. Yeah, because a lot of people, a lot of Christians say that and it’s very true. Once you up once you’re down. We can even use that analogy for, Will Smith, being the biggest movie star and now he is down. The Lord giveth on one hand and the other hand he taketh away, like Denzel Washington said, and devil comes for you when you get to the top. And sometimes you’ve got to be able to resist him.

Daphne Maxwell Reid relationship with her father

Now the second episode that I wanted to talk about, Will Smith, talked about it in his book, is that episode where his father played by Ben Vereen, where he came into his life and then he left and you had this scene where you said

“if you walk out of this kid’s life, again, don’t come back.”

Can you identify with that episode? What was your relationship with your father? Will Smith, had a love hate relationship with his father.  His father abused them as a child and what we’re seeing today are the results of that abuse. What was your childhood like?

Daphne: My childhood was idyllic. Mother and father who were loving and supportive. Yeah, my daddy used to spank my behind when he thought I needed it, but I don’t call that child abuse. I call that discipline and sometimes it’s needed maybe once or twice and you get the message. But I had a wonderful father. He was he was a mentor on so many fronts, as was my mother. She is the person that I am striving to become. And I had no problems as a child. I was brought up in the projects as they call them, just low-income housing that my father was able to get into because he was in the army.

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It was a, black community. It was multiracial. It was multi ethnic, it was an exposure to all kinds of people but that’s what New York City was like back in the 50s. So, I grew up in a very multicultural, supportive environment. I am not one whose father left. This episode on, Fresh Prince, was one that made, Will Smith, vulnerable again. They address the same issue in the new show. Bel Air where his father comes back and he finds out where his father has been and, in the new Bell Air, he sends his father away.

But I think from the character’s point of view in the original episode of the, Fresh Prince,  there was enough pain and we know what pain he went through when his father first left and we didn’t want to see him in that kind of pain again.

Breaking barriers with relevant storylines on the Fresh Prince

Myrna: Yeah. I mean, you told Will’s father if you walk out, never come back and he did walk out.  I guess when the writers put that episode together, they were probably trying to address, a black culture where we all grew up.  A lot of us grew up without that experience where you have to have a mother and father in the home. Majority of black kids grew up without a father. Again, when you’re dealing with some, important issues and trying to make it funny.

This episode was very emotional for, Will Smith. And that’s why he talks about in his book, and now you’re saying that they’re still bringing it up in the new, Fresh Prince of Bel Air.

Daphne: Yeah, because the storyline is basically the same. But in the hour format, they have the ability to dig deeper into each of the characters and see a well-rounded character, that we didn’t have time to do get a half hour show. We had five different opinions on how to confront this issue. And sometimes we laugh, sometimes we cry, but as a family, we get a solution to whatever the challenge is.

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Still breaking barriers at 60 years old

Myrna: And yes, your husband played by James Avery was a rock. He was not only funny, but he acted that part very well. And I know that, Will Smith, looked on him as a father figure.  So, it was beautiful that you guys we’re a real family. And I think that’s what happens when you work together for you know, five, six years.

Daphne: Not necessarily I have had other series other than the, Fresh Prince, that I’ve been on. And you might be friend one or two people in the show, but it’s never been this close a family with any.

Myrna: Hey, that’s amazing. Now let’s talk about you, transforming your career at 60. You said that you woke up on your 60th birthday and realized that you have been opening doors and, breaking barriers, for younger generations for a long time. What were some of the, barriers, your career has broken down and do you still think that you’re breaking down some, barriers?

Daphne: I think my existence is breaking down a, barrier. Many, many situations it’s nothing more than just educating people that people like me exist. They are not all categorically one way or another. That is a, barrier, to break because there’s a lot of misconception about our community. And we have strived all the years we’ve been in television to show a broader range of our community. Show the people that we grew up with as well and not just the characterizations created by the dominant culture of what they think, black people do, and how they are.

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Transform your Mind TuneIn Radio
TuneIn Radio

Fresh Prince of Bel Air breaking stereotypical barriers

We had the freedom on, Fresh Prince, to sit around the table with the writers when we got the scripts and say, no, I think culturally, this is different from where we’re coming from, and they were able to listen and adapt to the cultural specificities that we presented. And it was very respectful and a great place to work. Tim Reid and I have been doing a lot of television since the 70s. And when we had the, the authority, the power to make sure that the people behind the camera reflected what we were presenting in front of the camera.

We took that opportunity to do that. And Tim is famous for creating heads of departments where there didn’t used to be any in the, black community. So, he’s got a whole legacy of changing the camera. What you never saw before, and now it’s so refreshing.  I went to work on the new Bell Air for one episode and behind the camera was the most diverse, young, vibrant group of folks, I was pleased. Whatever contribution we made in the 70s and 80s and 90s to make break down, barriers, to make this more normal. I am so pleased that it is expressed at this time.

Transform your Mind Stitcher
Transform your Mind Stitcher

The black experience is not monolithic

Myrna: Yes, that’s amazing what you said about the, black experience, as a reflection of our true culture and not stereotypical, it’s really interesting that I came to that consciousness just a couple weeks ago. I was on XFINITY and they have a category called, black experience. So, I went on to that category. And everything on there is about woman who can’t pay her rent, and she is evicted and, and all that and I said to myself, why can’t they show a, black experience like the Kardashians. That’s what I want to see. I don’t want to see struggle. I don’t want to see the black person homeless or whatever.

But you’re right what you guys did in in the, Fresh Prince of Bel Air, is you showed a professional, black experience.  Beautiful house, everybody was a professional and wealthy living in Bel Air. I noticed that Herman Ainsley played on an episode and his show The Jefferson’s also showed a different, black experience. He’s the other one who started to break those stereotypical, barriers.  You got broke down barriers and opened the but the door needs to be wider. Black people, is not all about poverty and struggle.

Daphne: It needs to show all of our experiences we are not a monolithic group. No, we are as diverse as any other nationality, race, whatever. We have a lot of diversity. We have successes, we have failures. So, does everybody so they should show a wide berth? So, people can see that we are not, monolithic. And when we have control of the content, which is something we have continually strived to do. We have control, we have the ability to express those kinds of differences.

Myrna: And even the black actresses, whether they’re actors or actresses, they’re always striving for better roles too, because they always want to pigeonhole you into the, black experience, where you’re, a stereotype.  Nobody wants to show a millionaire or billionaire black person in the show. And I believe that’s necessary to inspire our people.

Podbean Transform your Mind Podcast
Podbean

Breaking barriers in black programming

Daphne: It’s changing and a lot of the change is because there are more platforms to show work than there used to be. It used to be only three networks and that was it for if you want to see something on that little box, but now there’s so many platforms and there’s so many people who are taking the helm of producing and green lighting projects that reflect what they want to show.

I had the honor of being in the movie, Harriet, and what was so much of an honor for me.  I had only one line but I couldn’t care less. I wanted it to be around a, black female director,  a black female producer, a black male designer, a black fashion designer and Cynthia Erivo. I mean, it was such an honor to work in that environment, where you feel the passion from each one of them. To make this one of the best things you’ve ever seen. It was a remarkable working experience that I’ll treasure.

Myrna: That’s amazing. That’s true. And the academy rewarded them. They won several awards. All right so you have been married to Tim Reid for over 40 years, what is the recipe for a successful marriage in Hollywood? Do you still live in LA?

Google Podcast Transform Your Mind
Google Podcast Transform Your Mind

What’s the secret to a successful marriage in Hollywood

Daphne: No we do not live in Hollywood, Okay, in Hollywood we would have been with 40 years by regular calendars, but in Hollywood it would be like 160 years. A lot of people get their egos busted in Hollywood. If you’re not standing on your own two feet, you’re going to have a problem. But what I think our secret to a successful marriage is we’ve learned how to fight fair and we respect each other.

You have to start with a basis of respect because that fire that gets you together in the first place, doesn’t burn for 40 years. With this person who you have chosen to be with, and you cannot change anyone, so stop trying to change people. They are who they are. Deal with it. Well, that goes both ways and always bring something to the relationship.

Don’t go there just to take. Make sure that you have something to give in the relationship, so you can grow together and allow each other to grow in the way that they personally need to grow. Its hard work and takes some effort. It takes learning how to fight fair and perseverance. It also takes some love Yes.

Myrna: Of course, love have to be there else it’s not going to work. But you are correct the love transforms itself from passion just loving being together and doing life together.

Daphne: You have to want the best for each other. I mean, if you start to tear down their desires to grow, you’re really setting a bad example, because they can turn around and tear down your desire to grow and stagnation is not a good component of a marriage.

Myrna: That’s awesome. What are you up to these days? Are you still acting? I see you have 4 photobooks and a cookbook.  Can you tell us about those?

Deezer Transform Your Mind Podcast
Deezer Transform Your Mind Podcast

Taking photos of life

Daphne: When I take photos, I do things with them. I made tote bags this this year because COVID kept me from traveling and I couldn’t take more pictures. I always do a line of coats and I still do custom coats. I stay busy because I like staying busy. And I have some talents to share and I continue to say share with them. I made masks during COVID I still make masks, I put a HEPA filter in them and they’re safe to wear but they’re also stylish. I make them for donation pieces for different art groups that I work with.

I designed fabrics that I use to make these masks, I designed fabrics for any use. I like to take these journeys of exploration and see where they leave me. And since I turned 60 many years ago, I started my photographic journey and decided that I was going to be a photographic artist. I had to learn what that meant and how to do it. And I started with gallery shows and I started making note cards and prints that you put on the wall and they just evolved into stories that I’ve talked about my travel which into books, which turned into a wonderful, wonderful way to travel.

Myrna: What do you photograph? Is it scenery or people?

Daphne: Only doors I only take pictures of doors.

Myrna: Oh, that’s amazing.

Transform Your Mind Podcast Pandora
Transform Your Mind Podcast Pandora

Using Doors as a metaphor of life

Daphne: They are, to me a metaphor for life. I want to encourage people by looking at my doors to see what I saw at that moment because I only take one picture of each door. See what I see at that moment how God lit it. How the craftsmen crafted it. Colors, the texture, noticing the details of your life makes your journey very rich. Don’t go from A to B just to get there, be sure that you pay attention to the details of getting to be because that enriches your journey and makes for a wonderful joyful life.

Myrna: Now that’s a perfect metaphor or analogy to end the transform your mind show, that is amazing. I did not notice that. And I’ve actually never heard that. How many times do we notice a door? We just use it as an entry point. So that’s beautiful if you stop and look at that. I was doing some visualization yesterday and they said that whenever you walk into the door of your house, that you should picture yourself walking into your dream life. I never pay attention to my door and never remember my visualization.

Daphne: You just notice the details in life and it really is enriching don’t just hold that phone and walk around. Open yourself up and live your life. Don’t just look for it to be animated in front of you.

Transform Your Mind Podcast Addict
Transform Your Mind Podcast Addict

Paying attention to life

Myrna: That’s wise advice. I follow the reaching of Sadhguru and he talked about, paying attention, to your inner world. So, I started doing that, paying attention, because we don’t even pay attention. Everything goes on automatically in our lives and in our body. So what you’re talking about is, paying attention, to things in life and then once you start doing that, then maybe you can bring it internally.

Daphne: Your health depends on you, paying attention, to what your body is responding to. You listen to it, and pay attention to it. It will guide you to what you need for your body.

Myrna: How can listeners connect with you and get copies of your books, masks and designs?

Daphne: www.DaphneMaxwellReid.com The site has everything about me, what I’ve been doing, what I’m going to do, what I’ve done.  Join me and look at what I have to serve with what I have to offer you.

Additional Resources

The Pursuit of Happiness: The Happiness Habit

 

 

Saying Yes To Your Demons

saying yes to your demons

Saying yes to your, demons, is how you get rid of them.  Demons, feed on, negative energy, and, conflict.  So just accept them and tell yourself if you ignore them they will go away.

Download the podcast here:

https://pdcn.co/e/https://chrt.fm/track/897G7/www.buzzsprout.com/1761155/10571045-saying-yes-to-your-demons.mp3?download=true

The monk who gathered demons

There is an ancient story of a, monk, who leaves his cave to gather firewood and when he comes back, he finds his cave filled with, demons. They had taken over the joint. His first thought is I got to get rid of these guys, so he tries pushing them out, fighting them, lunging at them but the, demons, were unphased.

The more he tried to get rid of them, the more they settled in.

His next approach was to teach them the, dharma, and make them leave on their own.

He teaches them about, impermanence, nonphysical and physical, compassion etc. but they just stared at him with wide eyes understanding nothing.

He realized that these, demons, could not be manipulated to leave so he resigned himself and decided to find out what they were there to teach him. As soon as he accepted these, demons, most of them bow and dissolve except one.

RadioPublic Transform your mind
RadioPublic Transform your mind

One demon always stick around

There is always one fierce, demon, that sticks around that is difficult to get rid of. So, he walks up to this, demon, and said “you win, just eat me” and he sticks his head in its mouth and that, demon, dissolves also. The moral of the story.

The, demons, leave when you stop fighting and say yes.

How many of you can relate to this story? You are, conflict, with your spouse, your boss or best friend. You are trying to convince them of your point of view but the more you try to debate the issue the more they settle in on their point of view.

So, finally you say to yourself I give up you win and the second head on your spouse vanishes!

Transform Your Mind Podverse.fm
Transform Your Mind Podverse.fm

Teaching Dharma to the demons

The, monk, even tried to teach the, demons, the, Dharma, and about, impermanence, because they felt they were still alive.

Buddha, had three essential teachings called the, Dharma Seals. These three teachings of the, Buddha, are:

  • Impermanence,
  • no self and
  • nirvana.

For instance, our body is visibly impermanent and getting older every day, and yet this is something we don’t want to accept. Certain popular magazines that cater to youth and beauty exploit this attitude. In terms of view, meditation and action, their readers might have a view — thinking in terms of not aging or escaping the aging process somehow. They contemplate this view of permanence, and their consequent action is to go to fitness centers and undergo plastic surgery and all sorts of other hassles.

Enlightened beings would think that this is ridiculous and based on a wrong view. Regarding these different aspects of, impermanence, getting old and dying, the changing of the weather, etc., Buddhists, have a single statement, namely this first seal: phenomena are impermanent because they are compounded. Anything that is assembled will, sooner or later, come apart.

Listen Notes Transform Your Mind
Listen Notes Transform Your Mind

Nirvana, is a place of perfect peace and happiness, like heaven. In Hinduism and, Buddhism, nirvana is the highest state that someone can attain, a state of enlightenment, meaning a person’s individual desires and suffering go away.

Just as all-important legal documents have the mark or signature of a witness, all genuine practices of the, Buddha, bear the mark of these three teachings.

Teaching impermanence to demons

If we look into the first, Dharma Seal, impermanence, we see that it doesn’t just mean that everything changes. By looking into the nature of things, we can see that nothing remains the same for even two consecutive moments. Because nothing remains unchanged from moment to moment it therefore has no fixed identity or a permanent self.

So in the teaching of, impermanence, we always see the lack of an unchanging self. We call this “no self,” the second Dharma Seal. It is because things are always transforming and have, no self, that freedom is possible.

When you are fighting, demons, it is easy to say “I give up, eat me” because they feed on the energy of, conflict, fear, and, negative thoughts, just remember another ancient saying “this too shall pass” the, demons, only stay if you fight them.

Podmust Transform Your Mind podcast
Podmust Transform Your Mind podcast

Demons are here to teach us something

What can our, demons, teach us? Every, conflict, is here to teach us something.

If you are in a relationship and someone is always pushing your buttons, then that is an opportunity for growth. This, demon, is here to teach you to have an, internal locus of control. When you have peace inside, no one can deliberately push your buttons. You will find that the, demon, dissipates when  you don’t react or respond. It is no fun trying to steal your peace if you don’t lose your peace. Practice not reacting to the, demon, just say yes and they will leave you alone.

Say This too shall pass, everything is impermanent.

Thanks for listening to this week’s episode of 5 min Fridays with coach Myrna

Additional Resources

Are You Trapped By Your Past?

Never Underestimate Your Enemy: Putin’s War on Ukraine

Putins War on Ukraine

Dr. Gleb Tsipursky  , is a Ukrainian and a behavioral scientist. He shares why we should never go with our gut.  He believes that Putin went with his gut and attacked Ukraine believing it would be an easy victory because  he was able to attack Crimea in 2014. There was not a very strong international push and reaction against, Russia. And the, Ukraine Army, did not perform very well. And so, he judged that based on past trends, and the same thing would happen again and he, underestimated the enemy.

And so, those impulses to make decisions quickly without sufficient information. That’s what a snap judgment is. And we do that because we’re overconfident. Just like, Putin, was overconfident in this situation, people are also overconfident about who they marry and chose a partner without proper information.

Download the Podcast Here 

https://pdcn.co/e/https://chrt.fm/track/897G7/www.buzzsprout.com/1761155/10543173-never-underestimate-your-enemy-putin-s-war-on-ukraine.mp3?download=true

Bio

Dr. Gleb Tsipursky is a world-renowned thought leader in future-proofing, decision making, and cognitive bias risk management in the future of work. He serves as the CEO of the boutique future-proofing consultancy Disaster Avoidance Experts, which helps forward-looking leaders in Fortune 500 firms, middle-market companies, and growing startups avoid dangerous threats and missed opportunities. He is the best-selling author of Never Go With Your Gut: How Pioneering Leaders Make the Best Decisions and Avoid Business Disasters, and other publications.

He was featured in over 550 articles and 450 interviews in Harvard Business ReviewFortuneUSA TodayInc. MagazineCBS NewsTimeBusiness Insider, and elsewhere. His expertise comes from over 20 years of consultingcoaching, and speaking and training for Fortune 500 companies, and over 15 years in academia as a behavioral scientist. Dr Gleb’s father is, Ukrainian, and he immigrated with his family to the United States in 1991.

Putin’s War on Ukraine

Myrna: Putin said that the reason he invaded, Ukraine, was because there were Jewish Nazis in, Ukraine. Everybody said that that was a ludicrous idea, because your president, Volodymyr Zelensky, is Jewish. So, educate us to what do you think was going on with, Putin. Why did the Jews come into the conversation?

Dr Gleb: The crucial thing, so again, I have a Jewish background and so does the current President of Ukraine, Zelensky, who has become world famous right now.

And so, Ukraine, and, Russia, and all that part of the world. A really important part of their heritage is fighting against the Nazi Germany in World War Two. So, if you think of the history books in, Russia, in, Ukraine, and Moldova, in Belarus, Latvia, Estonia, the United States, you have the 1776 revolution was like a fundamental episode in American history, kind of the founding in the Russia, Belarus, Ukraine, that part of the world, the former Soviet territories.

World War Two is really the crucial element that is in the history books as marking the rise of the Soviet Union, Russia, Ukraine. And so that was a fight against Nazi Germany. And that’s part of the people’s identity. So, whenever the political leadership is trying to scare people, and manipulate them into doing what the leadership wants, it brings out the specter of Nazis and labels everything bad on the Nazis. And so that when, Putin, was saying denazification. He’s not speaking to us, he’s speaking to his own people to justify the war. Putin, doesn’t think that the world outside, Russia, will be convinced that there are any actual real Nazis in the, Ukraine.

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Does Putin war on Ukraine come from his gut?

Myrna: Thanks for explaining a little bit about what, Putin, is doing as far as his conversation about the Nazi Germany. But let’s talk about you, you became a, risk management, and, decision-making expert, when we’re talking about war, when we’re talking about the pandemic, when we’re talking about anything that has risks; that is where your expertise lies. So, tell us about this, risk management, and what is that all about?

Dr Gleb: Sure, happy to. So, there’s a reason that my book was called “Never Go with Your Gut” Our, intuition, unfortunately, has been shown to lie to us very often. And many people trust their intuition. So, they think I should trust my, gut, that if it tells me something. That’s what I should do. I mean, that’s what, Putin, did when invaded, Ukraine.  He trusted his, gut, and we can see where it landed him?  In some very bad places.

Myrna: Yes, his gut told him that, Ukraine, would be an easy win, 6 weeks later, he had not made any progress.

Dr Gleb: You’re exactly right. You can see that his, gut, was very wrong. And that’s because he bought into these ideas, myths that you should trust your gut to follow your intuition. Despite the advice of many military advisors are telling him no to invade, Ukraine. Instead, Putin, sent his troops very quickly with unaccompanied tanks, paratroopers without sufficient support to try to occupy airfields around here to basically take the political capital. And that worked out very badly for him.

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Transform Your Mind Amazon
Transform Your Mind Amazon

Putin underestimated the enemy

My background is in, behavioral science, which means how do we behave, and why do we behave that way, it is part of, cognitive neuroscience. How does the structure of, mind, shape what we do? And the interesting thing about that is that our, mind, is really not evolved for the environment. So, when we see what our, mind, is about, our, intuition, our, gut reactions, those parts of ourselves that are bound for the savanna environment when we lived in small tribes of 50 people to 150 people, and survive using the fight or flight reflex.

And so, we have certain, intuitions, that are shaped by that Savanna environment that various structures of our, minds, which cause our, mind, to be lazy, minimizing the work that needs to be done. That causes us to make very quick snap judgments and make decisions based on past tendencies and predictions of what would happen.

So, for example, with, Ukraine, when, Putin, was able to attack Crimea in 2014, there was not a very strong international push and reaction against, Russia. And the, Ukraine Army, did not perform very well. And so, he judged that based on past trends, and the same thing would happen again and he, underestimated the enemy.

Podfriend Transform Your Mind Podcast
Podfriend Transform Your Mind Podcast

Why Putin Underestimated Ukraine

Myrna: Zelensky, was not the president back in 2014. Putin, underestimated the enemy, right.

Dr Gleb, He not only, underestimated the enemy, but the, Ukrainian army, which was very much strengthened, both by, Ukraine, itself and by Western Arms, military arms during that period, and he underestimated the strength and resolving of the international response, which was very strong.

Myrna: Putin, underestimated the enemy, because, Ukraine, is not part of NATO, so he felt they won’t get any help. He made a lot of bad calculations.

Dr Gleb: We need to learn that our, gut, often is not to be trusted. There’s a reason that about 50% of marriages end in divorce. Because people tend to trust their gut their intuitions about marriage.

Myrna: You’re right we marry somebody because of your, gut feelings.

Transform Your Mind Luminary podcast
Transform Your Mind Luminary podcast

Never Go With Your Gut feelings

Dr Gleb: Yeah, you should make a more evaluative and calculating decision. And it feels very weird for people to hear this if they should make a calculated decision about who to marry. But if you don’t think through your decision, you are not going to make good choices. Let’s say you want kids, are you prepared to raise your children as a single mother if you get divorce? Since the divorce rate is 50% and most times the women are taking care of the kids, you have to think this through before you get married.

If I’m the woman, I don’t want to be the sole caretaker of the kids. If we have kids will need to divide up responsibilities. 50% right, otherwise, so one of the most common periods for people to get divorced when you look at when people get divorced is the first year after having a child which is pretty terrible.

And so, those impulses to make decisions quickly without sufficient information. That’s what a snap judgment is. And we do that because we’re overconfident. Just like, Putin, was overconfident in this situation, people are overconfident about who they marry.

Transform your Mind Podcast Index
Transform your Mind Podcast Index

What is the impact of Russia’s war on Ukraine in the US

Myrna: Let’s get back to the war on, Ukraine. What do you think is the impact of, Russia, war on, Ukraine, on Ukrainians, and then on the Russians living in the United States?

Dr Gleb: So, Ukrainians like myself are definitely devastated by it. And we feel very strongly a lot of anger, a lot of frustration. And there’s especially this very weird dynamic where we’re all part of the, Russian, speaking community, right. I don’t speak, Ukrainian, all, I speak is, Russian.  But there are many, Ukrainians, who don’t speak the, Ukrainian, language, especially for ones who come from more from eastern, Ukraine.

And so right now, many, Ukrainians, are in the weird position of speaking a language that is associated with an enemy and that is their cultural heritage. And that’s been the position I find myself in. So that’s like a really strange and weird dynamic. And there’s a lot of sympathy and empathy for the people in, Ukraine, especially with people like myself, I have family there, and I’m really worried about them.  So that’s kind of, Ukrainians, and our experience.

Now I also have a lot of, Russian, friends and interests. My wife is actually Russian. She’s from Moscow, and I have a lot of other Russian people in my life, and I know that their main feeling is shame. Shame for what, Russia, is doing. People are burning their passports, just putting lighter fluid on their passports and burning them and expressing a lot of shame and grief and frustration. Feeling that they can’t ever go back to, Russia.

Transform Your Mind Podcast Player FM
Transform Your Mind Podcast Player FM

Discrimination against Russians in the US

It’s sad to see that there are some people in the United States who are expressing discrimination against, Russian, people. And of course, it’s really hard to tell someone who’s, Russian, from someone who’s, Ukrainian, like me, because we are speaking the same language, and have the same culture.

The Russians who are here are specifically up left, Russia, they do not want to be covered by that. So, it’s very important to not discriminate against them and to be supportive of them.

Myrna: How is the war on, Ukraine, going to affect relations in the future? Is there going to be some hate there between, Ukrainians, and, Russians? Do you think that divide is going to be permanent?

Dr Gleb: Yeah, I think that this divide is going to be there for several generations, because having this situation with just this brutal military conflict, especially some of the terrible, war crimes, coming out of Kharkiv, and other cities.  Civilians are being executed with their hands tied up and then being shot. That’s a horrible thing. And of course, other terrible things like, rape, and so on, but just the killing of civilians without any particular reason.

So, discovering those things is especially bad and just the shelling of Mariupol killing all those civilians. It that’s pretty terrible. I think the scenes especially of the brutal atrocities and, war crimes, in Kharkiv,  is going to cause a lot of just hatred for a very long time.

Myrna: So horrible to imagine and witness. Putin, is a, psychopath. He is exactly like Hitler.

Transform Your Mind Podcast Pandora
Transform Your Mind Podcast Pandora

Is Putin a Psychopath?

Dr Gleb: People like, Putin, who are arrogant, narcissistic, psychopaths, who just feel that they’re entitled and they’re grandiose and they’re ambitious, and they go with their gut. And then they make some pretty bad decisions that may harm all of us.

Myrna: So, what can the US do about, Russia’s war in Ukraine? You haven’t. You have some advice for the political powers?

Dr Gleb: Sure. So, I think one of the really important things to think about is how are, Ukrainian, citizens dealing with it from a humanitarian perspective, and to support, Ukrainian, citizens from a humanitarian perspective.  I think that’s very important. And what the United States does now will be remembered for a very long time, because the United States has been in the global eyes, it has been weakened in a number of situations, foreign policy wise.

Let’s say what happened in Afghanistan, that doesn’t look good and everywhere in Syria, many situations. So, this is a chance for us to redeem ourselves, and to really show that we are the leaders of the free world, and to really provide a model of how the world should act toward, Ukraine, by helping rebuild, Ukraine, is incredibly important.

Right now, Russia, is focusing on, Eastern Ukraine. I think there shouldn’t be a lot of efforts to rebuild the, Western Ukraine, at least with something like the Marshall Plan that was instituted after, World War Two, where the United States helped rebuild Europe after it was devastated by World War Two, something like that.

People ask, how much is going to cost? It’s definitely going to cost money, but think about the longtime term, the kind of goodwill we will get from all the people in, Ukraine, the people around, Ukraine, in Europe and elsewhere who will see the United States rebuilding a country that was devastated by foreign affairs.

Google Podcast Transform Your Mind
Google Podcast Transform Your Mind

Rebuilding Ukraine

Myrna: The United States, what about all countries in NATO?

Dr Gleb: We’re talking about what the United States can do right now. I certainly think the countries in NATO, it would be nice to help, but regardless of what they do, it’s very important for us as the leaders of the free world to help rebuild, Ukraine.  NATO aren’t the leaders of the free world. We are the leaders of the free world.

So, we should model the kind of behavior we want to see. And we should make sure by supporting, Ukraine, and building up, Ukraine, as a democratic country, we should make sure to support democracy around the world, because right now, we’re very much facing threats to our democracy.  Threats not only from, Russia, but much more importantly, China, other countries that are authoritarian regional countries that are not behaving very well.

And so we want to build up democracy and that means building up, Ukraine, and especially as the war winds down, and of course, at the same time supplying, Ukraine army, which we’re currently doing. I think that’s great. I think we should continue doing that and build up on top, but I certainly don’t think we should put any of our forces in there. I think we should provide them with weapons.

Deezer Transform Your Mind Podcast
Deezer Transform Your Mind Podcast

Putin’s failure to defeat Ukraine

Myrna: The United States is also accepting, Ukrainian refugees.

So, we allow, Putin, to go in and destroy this country, and then somebody else has to rebuild it. How do we stop him from doing it again, or any other country from doing it? Is there a way to stop that? I mean, Putin, should rebuild, Ukraine.

Dr Gleb: For sure, it’s easier to destroy than to build. That’s first of all, and I think what will prevent him from doing it, again, is the, sanctions, that will degrade, Russia’s economy, and ability to build more modern weapons. That’s what we need to worry about, about, Russia, having more modern weapons, and by using pretty harsh, sanctions, which I think it would be good if the, sanctions, were ramped up more that will that will punish, Russia, and prevent it from going to war easily. Again, the future will also demonstrate to other countries like China that they should not be invading countries.

If you look at the Chinese messaging, communication, propaganda, they’re very much pro-Russian. So, we want to make sure that we have very strong, sanctions, on, Russia, in order to discourage China and other countries from trying anything like this in the future.

Myrna: It is great that, Putin, did not succeed, because if people are still watching it, you know what I mean? It wasn’t a successful venture. It was just a very costly venture, destroyed, the whole country, killed innocent people, and he didn’t get anything. He didn’t possess the land.

Podbean Transform your Mind Podcast
Podbean

Sanctions to punish Putin

Dr Gleb: You absolutely right Myrna that’s very important. So, that’s coming in part from our military help, which is great. And also, the, sanctions, are helping.  We need to keep the, sanctions, but it is very important to rebuild, Ukraine. Nobody will do it if we don’t do. And so, this is the crucial thing that I think I want to point out that we really need to work on rebuilding credit. If we want democracy to flourish.

It’s very easy to say democracy is great, and it will flourish naturally. But we see that’s not the case. China, Russia and many, many other countries are authoritarian. And if we want democracy to win instead of authoritarianism, like in China and Russia, we need to build up democracies after they’re devastated by authoritarian states.

I think is really important for to see happen in, Ukraine. On the one hand, I think we definitely want to welcome refugees, Ukrainian refugees. I don’t think we should mandatorily support from coming here. So, there’s a natural filter system for the only the most capable and dedicated ones coming here because it takes a lot of money to come to United States.

So, we’d not have a program or evacuation like an Afghanistan, where we support people, Ukraine.  I think we want to welcome, Ukrainians. And also more controversially, I think we should really want to welcome those, Russians, who are leaving, Russia.

Myrna: How can listeners get in touch with you for, speaking engagements, your book, your articles, your social media handles etc.

Conclusion Putin’s War on Ukraine

Dr Gleb: Well, my book “Never go in your Gut” is available on bookstores everywhere and there’s an audio book for people who like that. There’s digital and physical to check it out, find the normal Amazon, whatever you want. My own resources are going to be at www.disasteravoidanceexperts.com. There’s my contact information for all the people who have any questions about anything.

I said that are interested in this sort of engagement, consulting coaching, speaking and so on. There are my blogs, videos, podcasts, audiobooks, ordinary books, online courses, check those out. And there’s a free online course and assessment on making dangerous judgment better so to help you avoid those dangerous judgment errors.

So, if you want to take an assessment of these, cognitive biases, as part of an online course, check out a free course at www.disasteravoidanceexperts.com/subscribe.

Additional Resources

How To Turn Your Pain Into Power

 

If life Gives You Lemons Make Other Plans

coach Myrna If Life gives you lemons make other plans

You have all heard of the expression “If life gives you lemons, make lemonade.” It is a proverbial phrase that is used to encourage people to stay optimistic and to keep fighting in the face of adversity or misfortune. Lemons, suggests sourness and difficulty in life; making, lemonade, with, lemons, that is being handed out to you turns the whole sour episode into something sweet, positive, and desirable.

Download the podcast here:

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Here is a story to illustrate How to Make lemonade out of lemons

When the British colonized India, they built a golf course in Calcutta, and they had a problem with the, monkeys. The, monkeys, would pick up the balls the golfers hit and put it somewhere else.

  • They tried to solve the problem by building a fence around the course, but, monkeys, climb, so that didn’t work.
  • They tried to lure the, monkeys, away with bananas, but then some were lured away, and others weren’t. Plus, all the, monkeys, for miles around would show up to feed on their favorite food, so that didn’t work either.
  • Finally, they changed the rules and had the golfers play the ball from wherever the, monkeys, dropped it. If life gives you lemons, make other plans.
Listen Notes Transform Your Mind
Listen Notes Transform Your Mind

This is a strange story to depict the mantra “if life gives you lemons,  make, lemonade, or other plans.” We don’t always get sugar and spice and everything that is nice, most of the time, things don’t work out the way we planned.

Podmust Transform Your Mind podcast
Podmust Transform Your Mind podcast

We make plans but God makes other plans

One of my favorite shows was Private Practice.  Addison made a statement on the show that says

“We make plans but God, make other plans, he has the last word”

Your desire to have a baby could be so strong that you pray every day, you dream of your child every day, you think of your life with your baby every day, but it’s been 5 years and you are not pregnant. The doctors say you are infertile. Time to play the ball where the, monkeys, dropped it and make, lemonade, out of your, lemons. Make other plans, adopt a child, foster a child, look for a surrogate mother or start fertility treatments.

Another way to use the proverb, if life give you lemons, make, lemonade, is to practice the, law of detachment. This law states that in order to manifest our desires, we must release attachment to the outcome itself as well as the path we might take to get there, that you should only be attached to your end goal not the journey.

Transform Your Mind Podcastland
Transform Your Mind Podcastland

You can put the law of detachment to work with these steps:

1. Today I will commit myself to, detachment. I will allow myself and those around me the freedom to be as they are. I will not rigidly impose my idea of how things should be. I will not force solutions on problems, thereby creating new problems. I will participate in everything with detached involvement.

2. Today I will factor in uncertainty as an essential ingredient of my experience. In my willingness to accept uncertainty, solutions will spontaneously emerge out of the problem, out of the confusion, disorder, and chaos.  I will understand that, if life gives me lemons, I will make other plans. The more uncertain things seem to be, the more secure I will feel, because uncertainty is my path to freedom. Through the wisdom of uncertainty, I will find my security.

3. I will step into the field of all possibilities and anticipate the excitement that can occur when I remain open to an infinity of choices. When I step into the field of all possibilities, I will experience all the fun, adventure, magic, and mystery of life.

Transform Your Mind Podnews
Transform Your Mind Podnews

If life gives you lemons remember the goal is the destination

If your goal is to retire and travel the world, that is your, destination goal. The journey could take you around that golf course several times back and forth, sometimes you would be stuck in the sand box, sometimes you will hit the ball in the lake, but if you keep playing you will eventually get to the 18th hole. Use this analogy for your life, just keep playing the, game of life. Don’t be attached to the journey just the, destination goal. If life gives you lemons, make other plans.

The target affects the arrow! Keep the target in your vision and the arrow will find it.

Forrest Gump said it best, life is like a box of chocolates you never know what you are going to get so,  if life gives you lemons, make other plans.

This is coach Myrna Young and you have been listening to 5 min Fridays with coach Myrna.

Additional Resources

The Events in Life Work Together for Your Good

 

How to Find your Soulmate

How to, find your Soulmate,, we’ll have tips today on, how we attract our soulmate, how to live with him or her, and have out of body physical love! Today I am continuing my talk with International renowned author Ilona Selkie. Our topic is, “How to, find your Soulmate,”

Bio

Ilona an International best-selling author, Seminar leader, Lecturer, Musician, CEO and co-founder of Living from Vision.
For over thirty years, Ilona has inspired thousands of people
worldwide to discover the power of their consciousness and to create successful lives. Ilona has written four books one of them we’re going to touch on today because in that book she specifically she talks about how to, find your soulmate. That book is called “Dolphins Love and Destiny” Ilona’s newest book is called “Dream Big, the Universe is Listening”

iHeart Radio

https://www.iheart.com/podcast/269-Transform-your-Mind-29542107/

In my first interview with Ilona, On the Transform your mind with coach Myrna radio and podcast, we talked about the Quantum Field, and energy. Today we are using that energy and we’re going to direct it specifically to, How to, find Your Soulmate,” In addition to authoring the four books, Ilona has produced music and meditation CDs, co-authored two books with Brian Tracy, and one with Jack
Canfield. She has also been a regular guest on A& E and Bravo TV with Jack
Canfield, and was a producer and TV host for the Quantum Living show on Women’s broadcast TV.

I love talking about soulmates specifically, “How to ,find your Soulmate,” and we’ll have tips and tidbits today on, how we attract our soulmate, how to live with him or her, once we found them and have union into old age!

Every single person needs to know this. I’m going to tell you how I met my husband and, “How I found my soulmate”, I think that he’s my, soulmate and I want you to confirm that or deny it based on data I will share later in the program; but yes we’ll get into all the details on, “How to, Find your Soulmate,” it it’s going to be a very interesting conversation, and one of the things I love about this show is that I learn as much as my audience from interviewing my guests. I pick topics that are stimulating and tantalizing, and that I and everyone listening could find some commonality with it. So yes this is one of the topics that everyone will be interested in listening to your expertise on.

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Transform Your Mind with Coach Myrna Show notes:

My journey to finding my soulmate

Ilona, tell us your journey from your childhood to
becoming the CEO and co-founder of Living from Vision. Please share that
with us and why don’t we tie it right into our topic today, “How to, find your Soulmate,”

From some magical moment when I was maybe 10 years old, I had a
flash of a person in front of my mind who I knew was going to be my husband.
Now he had a beard, he played guitar, he spoke English. Honestly those were my goals and my desires. That was on my bucket list as to what my husband had to be. I was German mind you. I’m in Germany, I’m going to school, but my husband needs to be able to speak English from England!
He would be speak English, have a beard, and play guitar so those were my
Requirements. Then I saw a flash again. I was walking through
downtown my little village, and it flashed into my mind, this future husband image again.

https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/transform-your-mind-coach/id1144973094?mt=2

I’m going to tell you how to create Union that lasts despite aging and how you feel satisfied
whether you’re still young or old, and how to merge your soul with your, soulmate, because that’s what I have found with my, soulmate.

How I found my Soulmate

Myrna – I met my husband and, soulmate, as I walked into a train. He was the officer on the train collecting tickets. He was by the front door as I walked on the train. I noticed him. I said to myself, of a new officer. He was Black. I had not seen a black officer on the train before, so I noticed him. He told me later, that when he saw me walk onto the train, he had a warm feeling in his body. He’s never felt that before. I took the train every day to and from work.

The next time he saw me sitting on the train, he built up the courage to come and talk to me. We talked for about half an hour until I got off of my stop and when I got off of my stop my heart and my whole body went into somersault. It was an amazing! I had this feeling of euphoria. I knew that he was going to be my next husband!
I’m not sure if I know he was going to be my next husband, but I knew he
was in my next relationship and that I had definitely, found my soulmate, I was still married at the time, but the relationship had run its course and we were on the way out. So, I knew he was going to be my next relationship. My heart didn’t stop some somersaulting for the entire week! Every time I was on the train, I couldn’t even read. I could not do anything, but keep an ear out for him coming to talk to me. I was just expecting him to show up and my heart just kept somersaulting! Yes, we had a connection right away.

 

An Overview to, Finding Your Soulmate

The first truth in how to, find your, soulmate, is to understand the nature of a, soulmate. It’s strange, but most people don’t sit down to figure out what a, soulmate is. As a result, people often force the wrong person into fitting the, soulmate mold. If you want to know how to, find your soulmate, then you need to actually “know,” rather than wing it in understanding what a soulmate is.

Ilona – that so awesome because I think the body doesn’t lie. If we’re attentive to our body signals and feel our heart and are open to it without numbing it with alcohol or numbing it with anger or numbing ourselves with other kind of
prescription drugs. If we stay clean, if we listen to our body, if we’re open to
the knocks of the universe and the universe talking to us, I think we really
feel a lot through our body. I definitely love my body and you know
some people will tell you they get sweaty palms and they get weak knees.

Myrna – I know that but my heart just jumped up and down like a trampoline! I
tell you it was like sometimes, it wasn’t a heart attack somersault, it was like so
like a kid jumping up and down on the bed. I wanted to
ask you, “How do you usually, find your soul mate,”

I’ve read about people, finding their soulmate, before they meet them in person.

https://www.essence.com/celebrity/black-celeb-couples/meagan-good-devon-franklin-honor-each-others-love-his-birthday/

Here are some examples of, Finding your soulmate, before your meet them in person:

• I just finished reading this book called “After the Dance” by Jan Gaye, she was Marvin Gaye’s wife. Marvin Gaye was one of the top R&B;
singers of our generation. She was his wife. She wrote in her book that when she saw him at 8 years old, she had a crush on him. She fantasized about marrying him and she fantasized about being his woman. When she finally met him at 17 years old, He took one look at her and fell in love with her, even though she was 17 years his junior and still in high school. She became his second wife when she was 20 years old and the mother of his two kids.
• Then I heard about Megan Good. This is, how she, found her soulmate,
Megan Good is a very popular black actress. She said that there is this guy, Devon Franklin that she knew that she was going to marry. She knew that he was going to be your husband and she started telling everybody he was going to be her husband. This was before they met or he knew who she was. When he met her, I don’t know what happened; but you he felt an immediate attraction to Megan and told himself he’s a preacher and
she’s a movie star. It was not going to work. But whatever energy that was guiding them, worked it out. The attraction was too powerful and they ended up getting married. That is how they both, found their soulmate,
• Angelina Jolie, I know you know her. He didn’t turn out to her, soulmate. She decided that she was going to marry Billy Bob Thornton even before she met Him! She tattooed his name on her inner thigh.

Does the universe pick our soulmate

So my question is. Is that , How we, find our soulmate,? Does the Universe picks our, soulmate, for us?

Ilona – I get the vision thing. Honestly that’s
what I do write about in my book “Dolphins Love and Destiny” you can get my
books all on Amazon. If you just google my name alone Ilona Selke you will find my books. But let me tell you what happened after I found my, soul mate, and this ties into a bigger question Karma and destiny. Is it their free will? Is there a predestined life? Do we have a guide? Your subconscious mind is helping you because that’s what they say that anything you dream about, your subconscious mind is going out there and working for you as you’re dreaming about it.

I saw this as the big question. Do you make up life or does it make you up? To
what degree do you we have input in, How to, find our soulmate,?
So, let’s fast forward about another 6 years, not a couple years but six years.
I have a dream and in my dream
God speaks and says there’s another man you’re supposed to
Marry. Wow I say God, I am so happy we’re living like two love birds. Living, loving working everything together. Everything we do is the same, we love everything, we we’re just a match made in heaven. I think I got that dream wrong!

Whatever you hold in your head, you can hold in your hand!

It could be money, it can be people, it could be anything that you
Want. Once you think about it, there are some things
that you can do in order to make that happen.

So, Ilona what can normal mortals do to manifest their vision and, find their soulmate?
I know you are operating at a higher frequency, but 90 % of my
listeners are not going to be at your level. So what can we do every day?
Let’s give a picture here. Let’s say that you’re in your 40ths and you know you’re not married and you want to be married. You’re looking for your, soulmate, you know men have come and gone, but nobody is your, soulmate. How do you lay the ground rule or answer that question, how do I, find your soulmate,?

Can’t kind your soulmate?

I’m going to tell the story. I had a coaching client who came to me for help in her career but she was going through a bad relationship so inevitably we would talk about her relationship. She had three failed relationships in which she felt used because she had money stolen from her. But she couldn’t handle being alone so she became a pleaser in her relationships.
She was miserable in her current relationship and this guy was once again using her and taking advantage of her. I said to her, you have to
stop being afraid and picture the perfect guy that you want. You’ve got to picture what you guys are going to be doing together, picture the house you’re going to living in, etc.

We started working on that and a couple months later, one of her
ex-boyfriends from her high school contacted her on Facebook and
within a couple of months this girl had moved half the way across the country from Florida to California and was in this absolutely wonderful relationship, the same one she imagined when we did our mind work together.
A year later they got married to her, soulmate, and she is now incredibly happy. She found her, soulmate.

Ilona – Here is a trick, if you want to fall in love with someone or have them fall in love with you, gaze into their eyes for five minutes straight.
What happens when you look into another person’s eyes? They say the eyes are the door to the soul. Now imagine you’re looking but you’re not just looking at the pretty color of their eyes or whatever else you might see. Look at the feeling that you get. Almost like you could look through their pupils into another universe. Imagine you could dive into that big universe and find the star that shines through their eyes. That is how you connect with someone. That is how you get them to fall in love with you!

In my book The Wisdom of the Dolphins Love and Destiny, I described it often in my book Dream Big the Universe is listening. This is how we can connect soul to soul and when we take time.
When I wake up I go into my inner world and I\ say hello beloved, and I see my beloved Don as a star within the heavens. I imagine it as the source, God you know that we meet as a pinnacle does of two points, two lines meeting in the singular apex and at that point where you can merge two into one. When you can manage to surrender to your own identity into
that feeling of actually touching in to the other one and merging and becoming
one flame. Imagine two candles making one flame. When you get into that state, you
can practice and get there. I teach people, how to, find your soulmate, this way. They can all do it. That moment is love. You asked me to define love and here’s my definition.

Love is where two or more unite in one.

I mean we can do it as a group, we can do it as a family, we can have an apex you know like a pyramid, you know mother, father, children. You can have the apex of the unity of the family as an energy center.
I do it with Don my husband, and I go into that apex into that singular
flame and I ask that flame, I say guide our relationship to the highest possible
good for all concerned and to be of service. Because there is an intelligence
within that union that starts happening because no two physical things can be in the same place right? We bump into each other, but our souls can merge into
singularity. I found my, soulmate

Myrna – That’s awesome, that is that is very true. In our last segment, we talked about, how to, find your soulmate, and manifesting your, soulmate, we talked about merging two souls. You know looking into you know your partner’s eyes and seeing not the physical body but seeing their energy. I was just actually learning that from a book that I’m listening to right now from Dr Dwayne Dyer. Basically that’s what he suggests that you know don’t see the physical, just see the soul of the person, you can look at them through the eyes of love. That’s exactly what Ilona was talking about. So now we want to pull on her so that we can take the conversation to the next
level. I know that the word tantric sex is something to do energy, so Miss India you know about the Kama Sutra. Give us some little tidbits in how to merge our souls into fabulous sex!

How to Merge your souls into fabulous Sex

Ilona – right yes physical as well as soul union. Let’s take a deep breath here. I want to start out with a quote from Erich Fromm from his book “The Art of Loving” and he says
build walls between people now it might be a small lie, it may be an omission of
something you feel embarrassed about. Well I tell you the greatest sex starts
with the feeling, well not everybody will agree with me, but I tell you the
greatest love fulfilled sex starts with being willing to be seen. You know with
warts and all. I mean if you’re willing to be seen for who you are and that
includes all your emotional baggage, maybe your incongruencies, maybe the fact that you had a bad thought or whatever it is you don’t want to download this whole thing the first date. No you wait until both of you bit-by-bit reveal to each other your deepest internal selves. You don’t have to start out with the darkest secrets first no make it gentle and slow, but come clean to your lover to your beloved, let them see you for who you are. Because that’s the only time you will feel loved is when you are no longer acting to be somebody that you think they might love. So let you learn, let yourself be seen for who you are
and start loving yourself.

I remember the day when I laid in bed and said ok God I’ve tried to get over jealousy. I guess I’m failing. This is it me warts and all. I am still a jealous woman and I am not sure how to help myself so could you accept me like this? and I was just swept up into the heavens and God said OK. You are who you are and by just offering myself up and being willing to be seen in my eyes to God.

I made this up in my head, but I still imagined that I just surrendered who I was and I said this is me and I’m trying my best! Well I was blessed, honest to God. Later on I had angels help me walk through situations where they came in and they uplifted my energy field, and I didn’t feel jealousy I felt loved!

I felt spaciousness and that’s another thing, when you are entering into let’s
say a sexual relationship with a person if you can call in support of energies
whether you imagine them to be angels, or your inner fear guides or just plain out God or even your ancestors or your subconscious it doesn’t matter what you frame. Just say please help me discover this ability to be to merge into union and bring the right person who is capable of doing that with me, because it’s no use being the quiet Queen when your counterpart isn’t
capable. So ask for help, how to, find your soulmate,.

Slow down, breathe breathe as much as you can don’t be a rabbit, I mean that’s the number one thing we need to slow down to perceive the heart, the feeling and the way you do it is you say let’s stop for a moment and just breathe and feel each other. Let me tell you, he will have more pleasure in the end I guarantee it to you. If you delay, I learned this from a French lover when I was young delay, delay attend trick is all about delay.

So here comes the next part you can do breathing exercises, you can look into each other’s eyes, but what really matters is learning to sense maybe in little baby steps at first where do you feel that the other person really is present with you and now I’m going to give you an image. Imagine that pyramid right
so you can meet at the base of the pyramid or you can go Midway King’s
Chamber or you can go to the apex, and you can go even beyond into the stars
and if you can, and are breathing through this with your partner, I mean it takes
two people to tango, but you can then start merging or feeling or pretend
that you’re merging with the other person’s soul.

Doing this during, orgasm,  allows you to pretend in your own way, not to just give away to the feeling of pleasure like rise up in your breath and pull it up and out through the top of your head into this imaginary apex in the universe with the other meets that beings soul.
Whether you know whether he or she is there or not just pretend you can do it,
touch them go for them and offer this ecstasy to the divine.
If you can believe in the divine you are really well off if not just turned over to the core big bang, the source give it to that source. In the moment of doing that. Now it takes a lot of discipline to do that you pull up
your breath you say here God I give you my orgasm ah, you’re imagining that
you’re meeting the other being soul you’re going inside kaboom. It’s
fireworks, you feel them at the other place at other time space, your body
will know what to do, believe me your body will go through whatever it goes\
through even for women or particularly you know who might take a little bit
longer or some who don’t orgasm, at a just the feeling of union will satisfy that sense when they go while the guy while let’s say typical women are a little bit behind the curve not all but and I don’t know about ethnicity but a lot of women I know they’re a little bit slower on the draw and you know it takes them longer and if the guy isn’t that feels like falling yeah it’s just biology you know it’s like anyway it takes the guy we go and journey with that other person’s soul now if you’re the guy listening right now do it with your woman. If you’re same-sex, do it with whoever you’re with and merge up into an imaginary apex of a particular spiritual.
Make it special, yeah that’s real and here is my promise.

Here’s my promise if you do this while you’re orgasmic, your orgasm will last longer.
Longer and be more satisfying you come out of the whole experience like ahhh oh my God what have I been missing?

They’re saying that one of the reasons that men go to have
affairs and then end up falling in love kind of thing, because they
think that they can just you know have sex and run, but then they’re connected.
If you knew that to become even more connected, you transcend the body and you get into the spiritual.

Myrna – I had a guest on my show you know very earlier on and she talked about the Tantric Sex, she gave me a little exercise that I do. She said that you when you if you breathe with
your partner similar to what you’re saying but if you if let’s say you’re
lying in bed and you hug them and you decide to breathe and sync with
their breath it’s almost like that spiritual hug kind of thing.

I have an app your readers can get for FREE

http://www.livingfromvision.com/LFVLITEAPPsignuppage.html

I want to remind you I love your reviews for the podcast “Transform your Mind with coach Myrna” Available on iTunes, Sticher, Tune in, Google Play, iHeart Radio. Your reviews help the show increase in ranking, which means more people can listen to fabulous content every week to get tips and strategies to Live their best lives Now!

Download Ilona’s FREE APP. It is easy to use. Wouldn’t you like to have an APP in the morning you just turn it on ten minutes and it gets you into that space where you get in touch with visualizing or feeling your success in advance and asks you to listen to your soul or feel into it and it’s beautiful music, soft voice
and it starts your day out right with focus. I made an APP for you for the morning and evening so it’s only ten minutes. It doesn’t hardly take any time to get started that’s why it’s so easy most people have ten minutes.

So visit my website Ilona Selkie or the APP store and download for Free and remember to subscribe, rate and review the podcast.

Can You Handle Success Like Chris Rock

Chris Rock success

Success is like a two-faced coin, one side is fame and fortune, the other side is no privacy and no peace. Chris Rock, knew about, success, and that he couldn’t retaliate to Will Smith’s  slap.

In my episode entitled “Will Smith had 10 seconds to choose a different reality”  we looked at the slap that was heard around the world from Will’s Smith’s perspective.

I agreed with Denzel Washington’s statement to, Will Smith, that when you are at the height of your success that is when the devil comes to destroy you.

The devil was able to grab Will Smiths peace and joy from him seconds before he reached the top of the mountain and the celebration began.

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How Chris Rock handled the moment

But today so want to talk about, Chris Rock. Most men even Pastor Jamal Bryant from Newbirth church in Atlanta, Ga said that if a man slapped him, he would not have turned the other cheek. They would not let anyone take their manhood and bitch slap them on National TV without retaliation.

The first thing my daughter said to me was that, Chris Rock, was so aware. He knew that the person walking onstage was Richard and not Will. He took the slap said “Dude it was just a GI Jane joke” and then completed this moment by saying “This is the Greatest night in television history.” He was present.

So why didn’t the, Devil, take out two black men at the same time? Why wasn’t he able to destroy, Chris Rock, who remained calm?

Why wasn’t, Will Smith, able to handle, success, and, Chris Rock, grabbed his moment. These are the questions I will attempt to answer in this episode.

Chris Rock, also had 10 seconds to make a decision to retaliate, he made a different choice and instead he continued on with the task at hand. He was there to present the, Oscar, for a documentary film.

transform your mind curiocaster podcast
curiocaster podcast

Chris Rock was prepared for success

Chris Rock, moment came and he was prepared for it. Apparently, he has been in therapy 7 hours per week for being bullied and abused in school. He was attempting to bury his demons.  Will Smith, also had a coach for 2 years, but his demons returned.

When your moment of, success, comes, if you take it, the universe rewards you. Chris Rock, is making bank. All his shows have been sold out and, Will Smith, will probably not get another movie role for a long time.

So, what does, success, look like to you?

Remember what you have now, you asked God for.

Transform Your Mind Podverse.fm
Transform Your Mind Podverse.fm

How does success look like for me

Success, to me looks like a beach front house, a million dollars in the bank a couple of luxury cars.

But I am, successful, now. Everything I have now, I asked God for.

  • I have a successful podcast,
  • I have a TV show,
  • I live in a 5-bedroom house in Florida,
  • I am an American,
  • I have a wonderful husband and 2 beautiful kids.

Don’t tell yourself that you will be, successful, when something happens. Nothing wrong with having goals, but you have to enjoy your life now or you will never be able to enjoy it then.

RadioPublic Transform your mind
RadioPublic Transform your mind

Happiness does not come with success

I heard both, Will Smith, and Kanye West say

“I have all the money I need, I have the hot wife and kids, the big house, career success but I am not happy.”

How will you handle, success? Be careful what you wish for, you might just get it.

Will smith, decided that the day when he was about to receive his highest honor, he would let the, devil, ruin it.

Chris Rock, responded to being slapped in front of his peers and the world with no aggression; he told, the devil.

“Get behind me Satan.”

He could not have imagined this scene, but maybe as a comedian he was prepared for someone responding badly to his joke and charging the stage.

Podmust Transform Your Mind podcast
Podmust Transform Your Mind podcast

Success is like a two faced coin

I was listening to the radio the other day and they were talking about a rapper who just retired because she didn’t like fame.  Most people want, success, but can’t handle it when it comes.  Success. is like a two-faced coin, one side is fame and fortune, the other side is no privacy and no peace.

Can you handle, success?

This is Life coach Myrna Young and you have been listening to 5 mins with coach Myrna.

Additional Resources

Transform your Business Life: Dress for Success

 

The Law of Attraction: How Vibrational Energy Works

Ginny Gane Law of Attraction

Ginny Gane, Law of Attraction coach, empowers women to transform mediocre lives into experiences of true abundance, joy, and love through levering the principles of, the Law of Attraction.

Leveraging our vibrational power allows us to create more love, harmony, and freedom in our lives.

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Abraham Hicks started my Law of Attraction Journey

Ginny: I’ve always been in the self-improvement space. I’ve been reading all the books from Self-improvement masters like Wayne Dyer, Louise Hay, Deepak Chopra.  I was traveling in Australia for a year on my own and the, Law of Attraction, part of this story is there was a day and I was feeling blah. I said to myself, oh, God, what’s going on? What am I doing?

I have no money, blah, blah. And I called my parents told them how I was feeling, and they suggested I get this book called “The Astonishing Power Of Your Emotions” by Abraham Hicks. And I’m like, yeah, yeah, whatever, guys, okay. And so, I hung up the phone, and I picked up my backpack and went to walk back to my hostel and as I was walking along past a bookstore, I saw that exact book on a table in front of the store.

I was like, that, oh, my goodness this cannot be a coincidence. And I looked it over and I’m like, it’s $35. I can eat for a year on that. So, I walked away but there was just something that won’t let me leave it alone.  As soon as I read that book, it was the piece I was looking for.  It’s what allowed me to feel empowered about my life and have some idea of control over it. I understood things can’t just happen to you. That is how I got started and I had never ever thought about it in a business. I just loved it.

I started using, Law of Attraction, in my life. And then a few years later a friend of mine said to me, Hey, you’re basically my, law of attraction coach, and I said, What’s that? What does that mean? I had no idea, and I was like that this could be a career path. I had always been passionate about doing something I loved. Whatever I was going to pick for work, I wanted to love it. And so, I was like well, I love this.  I would always be reading or talking about, the law of attraction. I never get tired of it.

And so just and I was like, Okay, great. Then the rest is history. And my path here and teaching has just continued to evolve and become deeper and more transformational in, Law of Attraction coaching.

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Feeling good is the doorway for the Law of Attraction

Myrna: I absolutely love that. So, when you read the book, by Abraham Hicks, you were in Australia for a reason.  Why were you backpacking in Australia?

Ginny: You know, the biggest thing that I started to practice was just paying attention to what I was thinking and how I was feeling, because that’s like such a foundation right to utilizing, the law of attraction. And basically, building this internal awareness of what was going on because when we do that, then we know what’s going on in our, vibration. I would just start to notice how things were matching and lining up.

So, when I woke up, and I felt really good, and I was walking along the beach and feeling happy, and I was like, Oh, you’re thinking about how good life is and then you feel happy. Okay, so there’s that connection. And then I would find $1 on the ground, or I would run into and have a really nice conversation with someone. I just started to pay attention and notice how, the law of attraction, was at play in my life. And that was I think the biggest shift I made before I really started to do anything else.

I’ve never really been like, trying to manifest things. I just feel like we’re here to live such a full life and a full experience.

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Myrna: Wayne Dyer talks about the power of intention, which is basically the same thing as, the law of attraction. But he also talks about feeling good. When you’re feeling good you know your, vibration, is good.

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iHeart Radio

Change your thoughts change your life

Ginny: I have Wayne Dyer’s book called “Change Your Thoughts Change Your Life”. Yeah, feeling good changes your life. What about you? How did you get into introduced to , the law of attraction?

Myrna: Well, like I first learned about, the law of attraction, from to just be Deepak Chopra and then I read Robin Sharma’s book “The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari” Then I bumped on to Abraham Hicks and her work with the, vortex.  I have stuff in my, vortex, that I needed to manifest. That was my introduction and I work with, the laws of attraction, daily.

Let’s transition into that. You talked about leveling your, vibrational power, and using, vibrational energy, for manifestation, you mentioned that you weren’t very big in manifestation.  but, as a, Law of Attraction coach, to your clients, I’m pretty sure that they want to manifest stuff. So how do you help them?

Ginny:  I find manifesting some of the bigger things in life requires finding that balance of wanting what you want, allowing that desire to flow through you and being happy, feeling good where you’re at. It’s this tricky because if we get too focused on our desires, what starts to happen is we notice that they’re not there. And so, we start activating more of the lack energy or the lack vibration and then attracting more of that.

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But I think one of the powerful parts of manifesting is just knowing we have this power. So, it’s not only, the law of attractions, happening, it’s happening now in every single human’s life. The Law of Attraction, is at play the same way as the, law of gravity. We’re using it no matter if we are aware of it or not. There’s nothing mysterious or magical we must do.  The Law of Attraction, is here for us 24/7.  And so, the more we pay attention to it, the more powerful it becomes for us. Our, vibration, is attracting things to us.

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Podbean

Vibrations and the law of attraction

Myrna: So true, we are manifesting whether we are aware of it or not.  People don’t understand why they’re getting all these things in their life that they didn’t then ask for, but as a, Law of Attraction coach, you know that they are manifesting it from there, vibration. So, explain, what is vibration.

Ginny: We are, manifesting, in every moment of every day and so, the Law of Attraction, works by responding to the, vibration, you’re embodying or putting out into the world. So, the way I like to think about it is like we’re constantly emitting this energy. And the, Law of Attraction, is constantly responding by bringing conditions that match that, energy. Now we know what that, energy, is attracted by how we feel. So, we measure and interpret, vibration, through emotion.

Myrna: You’re going to attract conditions that is similar to whatever emotion you’re feeling. If you spend a lot of time in anger or frustration, you’re going to attract negative conditions that vibrates at the same frequency of anger or frustration.  We never get out of the cycle, that is why we must pay attention to our, emotions, and, vibration.

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Ginny: Yes, and it is there’s that’s a real thing it’s like this momentum that builds up. So, we will attract frustrating conditions and then we will look at the condition and then feel bad and then we’ll look at what is next. It’s just the cycle. So, until we become aware of that cycle, we have no chance to stop it or to do something different. So the first thing we can do is just start to become aware of what you are getting back.

Google Podcast Transform Your Mind
Google Podcast Transform Your Mind

Vibration is energy

Myrna: You said something a minute ago that resonated with me, because I work a lot of my, energy. I work a lot of my, vibration. I do it every day several times a day, but mostly, I do it in the morning when I walk into the park because, we know that communing with nature builds of good, vibrations.  I spend a lot of time in nature trying to clear up my, energy.  But you said something a minute ago and it just reminded me that sometimes when you spend too much time on something, you build up resistance.  So tell us where is the line, how long should we focus on something before we started building up resistance to, manifesting, it?

Ginny: Myrna this is the tricky part because this line moves, so depending on what’s going on in your life, or what side of the bed you wake up on, your focus will either be really easy and flowing or it will be more resistant.  Only you know how it feels and this is my guidance on this, a lot of people get stuck on this is if you’re thinking about what you want and you’re thinking about it and thinking about it thinking about it and It’s not coming, then there’s resistance there, no doubt.

But you must pay attention to how you’re feeling when you’re thinking about the thing you want. How you’re feeling when you think about the thing you want, because it’s the thoughts that feels good about what you want that are bringing you closer to it, but if you’re having resistant thoughts, even the thoughts even thoughts like this is never going to happen.

Myrna: You’re saying okay, I want this. It’s not coming, maybe you’re saying maybe it’s never going to come or you know that kind of, negative thoughts. For example, you are thinking, I would like a red Mercedes and the minute you say you would like to red Mercedes, you immediately have the thought but I can never afford one.  That is a resistant thought and cancels out the manifestation of that red Mercedes.

Deezer Transform Your Mind Podcast
Deezer Transform Your Mind Podcast

How to visualize to manifest your dreams

Ginny: Correct. But you can think about the red Mercedes, and you can end as long as you’re feeling open and allowing and joyful and you’re like, oh, that’s exciting. I love the way that feels, then that’s great. But the moment it switches, and this is that line, you were talking about. The moment it switches from like, Oh, I love the Mercedes and blah, blah But when will that happen? Then you’re like well, okay, time to stop thinking about the Mercedes.

So, if you’re wanting that red Mercedes,  a little bit of resistance there, because you’re noticing it hasn’t come yet. It’s better for you to start thinking about something completely different, thinking about walking by the ocean. That gives you that same feeling and that opens the pathway for the red Mercedes to come in. This is one of the misconceptions is that we think we need to think about the details of everything we want in order to manifest it. We don’t need to need to obsess about thinking about the details. We do need to obsess about being in that, vibration, in that feeling place.

Myrna: Yes, I work on that. I try that okay. So how can we leverage, law of attraction, to manifest our dreams and desires? We talked a little bit about this, but are you talking here about the, vortex, or is the same? Feeling good?

Transform Your Mind Podcast Pandora
Transform Your Mind Podcast Pandora

3 steps for working with the Law of Attraction

Ginny: Yeah. The I kind of give three like simple steps in this. We can talk more about them. But the first thing is to ask yourself that question, I’m sure everyone’s familiar with it.

  • What do I really want? You know, how so let’s say what do I really want? I really want that red Mercedes.
  • Well, what does it feel like? This is number two. Why does that feel like when you’re driving in it? What does that feel like? And so you’re I what you’re doing is you’re identifying the, vibration, that you think that thing will get you.
  • And so now step number three is feeling that way activating the feeling that you want. So we tend to think the car is going to bring us the feeling, but when we’re leveraging, the Law of Attraction, we have the power to activate the feeling and then, the law of attraction, can bring us the car. So how would you say that that it feels to be driving in that red Mercedes?

Myrna: I visualize it. I try to, visualize, my hand on the steering wheel.

  • I, visualize, the smell.
  • I visualize the sound that’s coming through the radio.
  • I visualize driving down the road in a convertible and the wind is blowing my hair

 

Ginny: What’s the emotion there? What’s that emotion when you’re visualizing all that? What are you feeling?  Is it like freedom? Joy, happiness, contentment, like what’s the what’s the emotion there?

Transform Your Mind Podcast Addict
Transform Your Mind Podcast Addict

Emotions and the law of attraction

Myrna: Well, my emotion is feelings of abundance and Success. I am feeling good.

Ginny: So, then that’s what you take into step three. You want the red Mercedes if makes you feel successful, abundant, and free.  When we identify with the feelings and, emotions, now, we can go straight to it. Now we can start feeling that success on purpose. And we start directing our thoughts to make us feel successful. And then the car can come in because we’re in alignment with the feeling of success.

Myrna: I hear every coach talking about walking in it before you receive it. They’re not necessarily saying it’s, Law of Attraction.

Ginny: Another fun thing about, the Law of Attraction, is it is everywhere. In all the teachings everywhere. It’s in the Bible. It’s just not always called, the Law of Attraction.

Myrna: In the Bible is called faith.

Ginny: Exactly, yes. Faith is in prayer.

The Law of Attraction, doesn’t. play favorites. It doesn’t want what’s good for you. It just responds to your, vibration. it’s not pulling you one way saying, hey, this is your path come here. That’s not, the Law of Attraction. The Law of Attraction, only operates in this physical world and is just responding so it doesn’t care. If you feel happy about this or sad about this. It’s just going to respond to how you feel about something.

 

Everything is vibrating at a frequency

So, like we talked about earlier, vibration, is just energy. It’s just like electricity, it’s energy. And we interpret, vibrations, through our emotions. There’s an emotional scale. So, the same as there’s a frequency scale of energy, measured in Hertz from zero Hertz to 1000 hertz. Our, vibration, is very similar. It’s just a measure of that frequency.

And so there’s low frequencies and there’s high frequencies, and our, emotions, match up. Our lower frequency, emotions, are those like fear and guilt and sadness. Our higher frequency, emotions, are the happiness, the joy, the hopefulness, those kinds of, emotions. How we feel is our interpretation of the, vibration, we are emitting and what, Law of Attraction, is attracted to.

Myrna: All right.  I was reading something new today and it made me aware that everything is vibrating at an, energy, the walls in your house, the bed that you sleep in, the trees in nature, the rocks all are vibrating at an energy frequency. When I go to the park, I sit on rocks because the rock is vibrating. I’m trying to blend with the, vibrational frequency, of the rock.

Ginny: That’s why we feel so good in nature, because nature is connected to source, what you are talking about is Alignment.  Alignment is when your emotions are like in alignment with our God Self, or our Source self, that nonphysical part of us. And so, when there’s alignment between how we’re thinking and feeling, and that other part of us we feel good.

Nature, animals, they stay in this mostly connected place. That’s why we love to be around them. They’re just unconditional love pouring through. That’s why it feels so peaceful to be in nature is because we’re literally surrounded by these, vibrations, that are all in alignment.

Transform Your Mind Podcast Player FM
Transform Your Mind Podcast Player FM

 A champion’s Mindset 

Book A Champion's Mindset
Book A Champion’s Mindset

 Myrna: Tell us about your book  “A Champion’s Mindset.” I know that your first book that you read from Abraham Hicks was regarding emotions, but she also talks about the, vortex, tell us about your book.

Ginny: Yeah, my book was exciting to write.  I just want people to know that they have the power to create their reality. That’s available for everyone, no matter where you are, where you’re starting, your past anything. We all have this capacity. And so, my book goes over the basics of how to start leveraging this and applying it in your life.

So just like I said, those three steps are in there and there’s a process that that walks you through what’s going on how to start paying attention, and just gives you this understanding. I think one of the biggest things for me that allowed me to step into my power was just knowing how and why I was creating my reality. And so that’s what a champion mindset is about is like helping you understand so that you can be the champion of your own life.

Myrna: Yeah, a champion mindset, right. Of course. This show is all about, you know, transforming your mind.

Ginny: It is when you go from this place of being a victim and not in a bad way, but just feeling like life is happening to us, like we’re the victim. It even pops up for me now occasionally. When I forget, oh, yeah, you can change how you feel about this. Whether it’s the traffic or the weather, we have all these preconceived ideas about why this is happening to me, but we must remember we are the Co-creators of this life.

We get to work with life, that life isn’t just an accident. It’s not just happening to us. And so,  we go from this place of victimhood to this place of empowerment.  The freedom that comes from that  is what is also on a global scale, we need empowered individuals in order for our world to become more peaceful.

You can pick up a copy of the Champion’s Mindset on Amazon or wherever you get your books.

I love to hang out on Instagram @ginnygane  my website is www.Ginnygane.com.

Additional Resources

Using the Law of Attraction to Have it All

Dating with Purpose: Motivated to Marry

dating with purpose finding the motivated to marry

Amy Schoen, dating and relationship coach share How to understand the mindset of the, Motivated to Marry, and the rules for,  dating with purpose,

Be sure to subscribe on iTunes, iHeart radio, TuneIn radio, Google Play, Stitcher Spotify podcast players, and RATE and REVIEW.

Bio

For over 14 years Amy Schoen, a professional certified life and relationship coach, has helped marriage-minded men and women get off the dating merry-go-round and finally find their life partner. She also helps her clients build a loving, committed relationship that lead to, marriage, if that is their goal.

With the proven, Motivated to Marry, © Dating Secrets Coaching Program, Amy’s clients discover what they truly want in a life partner, often finding their “perfect” match, within 6 months to a year’s time! Finally they can now direct their energies towards being with their life partner, friends and family and enjoying their life pursuits.
• Amy is the Author of, “Motivated to Marry,- Now There’s a Better Method to Dating and Relationships”, “Get It Right This Time” and “How to Find and Keep Your Ideal Romantic Partner”. She has been featured in many radio, TV, and newspaper articles on, dating and relationships.

• Amy lives in the Washington, DC Metro area with husband (#2) of 16 years, and her 10 year old son. Find out more about Amy, her services, programs and her monthly Motivated to Marry podcasts at www.MotivatedtoMarry.com also available on iTunes.

Dating with purpose: meeting the man 

I have top-down approach with my clients, we first look at what you want for your Life. It’s being clear about your life. I go deep into the values and there’s a way for me to really kind of flush them out and pull them out because people think they know their values but when they go through my process they really kind of see.

Over 80% of my successfully matched, motivated to marry, couples met their
partners through, online dating, after they applied my process and, dating advice.
They become so empowered and they don’t take crap from anybody. I train them to watch out for those wishy-washy men who like well, maybe I’ll get married someday, maybe I’ll have a family one day.

Dating Advice: What to talk about on a First Date

I say on a first date there are three things that you really just
need to pay attention to: Here are, dating advice for first dates.
1. Does the conversation flow?
2. Do you not see any real apparent deal-breakers? The things
that you know are not going to work for you.
3. Are you somewhat attracted to this person? I mean not like you
can’t even imagine kissing him!

I mean usually within three or four dates you know whether somebody is
Going to work and if they are, motivated to marry,

What does, Motivated to Marry, mean?

We throw around the term, motivated to marry, so much since that is the topic of your book and that’s the topic of your expertise.
Motived to Marry, it is a, mindset, it’s, dating with purpose,
It came to me as I was dating and I was in my late thirties and I’m standing at a
party and I’m talking to this guy and he’s really cute and he plays with a
band and he’s going off to Europe for six months, and I’m kind of like
a strategic Maximizer, so I’m listening, I’m like oh my God, he’s not, motivated to marry,

Characteristics of the, motivated to marry, man or woman?

Dating with purpose, means being able to spot the, motivated to marry. The, motivated to marry, is basically somebody who if a woman looking for a man. I would say that he’s secure and is stable financially. Stable career, like everything else in his life is set, except he’s missing the missing the relationship piece.

These, motivated to marry, men tend to hate singles events and being single. They desire to have a steady companionship rather than the stress of continuing going out. I would say more introverted people tend to be, motivated to marry, and that’s why, online dating, has been phenomenal. Introverts love the internet because it’s a one-to-one medium.

How many dates should you go on before becoming exclusive?

Here is some, dating advice. By the fourth or fifth dates, you know whether you want go further. I have a whole thing about when to be exclusive and what you need before you would be willing to be a exclusive. To stop dating other people and just focus on this person. In the, motivated to marry, model I suggest that you kind of have to have the conversation about how long you’re going to be in a relationship before expecting to go the next step. I told my husband when we were dating, I’m not dating to date, I’m, dating with purpose, of marriage and having a family.

I’m, dating with purpose, I absolutely love that phrase because you can weed out so much without being intrusive.

Dating advice from Amy

I have a self-learning program I call a Home Study the, motivated to marry, dating on purpose, secrets program which is eight modules and it takes you through the,  motivated to marry, process in terms of getting to know yourself better, your goals and your values, which values to focus on as well as your must-haves or deal breakers and non-negotiables; so you really build way to really sift through people quickly. I also give you a lot of ideas about how to meet people.

I have 12 areas that I’ve identified of areas that we need to pay attention to in
A relationship and the conversations we need to have with our partner and then I also give you some tools some, relationship tools. I have written article on the test of time as long-term couples have lasted and I have the relationship dating hurdles.
The steps that you need to get from, dating to engagement.

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How To Get Your Super Motivated Boyfriend to Marry You
http://blog.myhelps.us/5-mindset-transformations-permanent-relationships/
http://blog.myhelps.us/alchemy-desire-episode-5-long-term-relationship-dance/

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Additional Resources

Are you waiting on Love? How Single Women over 40 Find Love