We are all, golden buddhas, underneath, we cover up our, inner greatness, with the, mud, of, self-doubt, feelings of, not being good enough, insecurity and other, negative emotions.
In this episode of 5 mins with Coach Myrna, I want to teach on the subject 3 ways to let your, inner greatness, shine through. I want to use the story of the, Golden Buddha, as my foundational story.
Story of the Golden Buddha that was covered up in mud by the monks so that the gold couldn’t shine through.
In Bangkok there is a golden statue of the Buddha that stands 9’8” tall, weighs 5.5 tons and is worth approximately 250 million in gold.
The statue was thought to be built in 1,403 and was revered by Buddhist for many hundreds of years. In 1,757 the Burmese Army was invading Thailand. Facing complete annihilation, the Buddhist monks at the monastery hastily began covering their, Golden Buddha, with plaster, which was painted and inlaid with bits of colored glass, to make it look of little or no value to the invading army. During the invasion all the Buddhist monks were tragically murdered, but the, Golden Buddha, was left undiscovered.
In 1957 an entire Monastery in Thailand was being relocated by a group of monks. One day they were moving a giant clay Buddha when one of the monks noticed a large crack in the clay. On closer investigation he saw there was a golden light emanating from the crack. The monk used a hammer and a chisel to chip away at the clay exterior until he revealed that the statue was in fact made of solid gold.
Don't cover up your inner greatness with mud
This story illustrates the point that we can cover up our value by layering it with, mud, as well. So let me ask you. What is your, mud?
What life experiences added layers of, mud, and covered up your value to the world?
We are all, golden buddhas, underneath, but we cover up our, inner greatness, with the, mud of self-doubt, feelings of not being good enough, insecurity and other, negative emotions.
Here are 3 ways to chip away at your mud let your inner greatness shine through:
Identify your mud. Is it self-doubt? Lack of self-worth? Body image, not being good enough? You can’t change what you don’t identify and until you dig through the layers of mud you can’t shine and become what you were created to do.
The, false self, is an artificial persona that people create very early in life to protect themselves from re-experiencing developmental trauma, shock, and stress in close relationships.
Meaning, our delusionary self-creation process starts early in our childhood.
Often, we had to be unnaturally attuned to the demands of our parents, sensing we had to comply in order to be loved and tolerated; we had to be false before we had the chance to feel properly alive.
And this continues in our educational systems and careers.
Most of the time, we are putting on a mask, complying with our teachers, our bosses, our colleagues, our partners, our friends…
2. Speak to the mud
if your, mud, is feelings of not being good enough for example then speak to those feelings and tell them that you are good enough, you were created for this purpose. If your, mud, is body image tell it that you are wonderfully made and beauty comes in all shapes and sizes and you are perfect just the way you are.
“Every problem is a gift – without problems we would not grow.” Believing that problems are opportunities to grow, rather than insurmountable obstacles, is called a, growth mindset, and it’s essential if you want to learn how to stop being insecure. Instead of feeling like a failure just because we have, insecurities, we gain the freedom to view those, insecurities, as a source of information for our personal and professional growth.
Instead of avoiding our, insecurities, we learn to speak to them. Most, insecurities, are not based on facts, so you can speak to them and challenge them. As you commit yourself to putting aside your fears and utilizing your insecurity as a source of valuable information, you eliminate the “what ifs” associated with avoidance and open the door to opportunity.
3. Take action to remove the mud:
Our daily behaviors reflect our deepest beliefs.
Clean up your language and speak life into your situation.
Take massive action to change your beliefs.
Train your mind with new beliefs and affirmations.
Realize that you were conditioned to believe that you can’t do something. Think of the elephant that is controlled by a sodden stick in the ground.
Figure out, When did you decide to accept this limitation.
Resources in the mind are unlimited, use the fuel of your thoughts to find the resources to do something great and uncover your, Golden Buddha, your, inner greatness, and let your value shin through.
Conclusion
Thanks for tuning into this week’s episode of 5 min Fridays with Coach Myrna. I want to invite you to join my Facebook group called Lifecoach to be inspired throughout the week. Until next time Namaste
Matheo Galatis teaches how we can connect to our, inner guidance system, to know ourselves and to find, who are you, your beliefs systems inherited from your, genetic patterns. Once you know, who are you, then you will be able to use the, law of Attraction, to get the things you want in life.
Matheo Galatis founder of the, Know Yourself teachings, aimed at supporting you to cut through the confusion in the, personal development industry, and learn about the hidden dynamics that affect your life. He has trained over 200 professional coaches, was a director of a coaching company in South Africa, worked in organizations such as Oracle stratus, South Africa, Mars, Africa and clients from 27 different countries, ranging from successful CEOs, political and public personalities, executives, coaches, trainers, therapists, and entrepreneurs.
But they are mistaking the, personal development industry, to a whole new level by supporting people to find what he calls your, transformational why. The one thing that usually prevents people from getting, unstuck, and achieving their desires.
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We develop our belief systems from genetic patterns
Myrna: That's an awesome Bio. It seems that you are in the work of service helping people to get to know them selves again. What was your journey to becoming a teacher of, personal development? How do we pick up these, genetic patterns?
Matheo: Essentially this is what happens. To know, who are you, and, know yourself, I explain in quite a bit of detail the different ways we take on stuff from our parents and the generations before. It can happen through observation. When we're growing up, we have certain experiences and we observe our parents, we start mimicking what our parents do.
So, that's one way, but it runs even deeper. Our parents, sometimes they have something unexpressed in themselves, a dream or maybe an emotion that's suppressed. And they've suppressed that, they push it down. Now what happens is when they conceive a child, the DNA of the supreme shun or the suppression is obviously encoded into the gene, because everything is according to the gene.
The gene knows there's a, suppression, and that gene goes into the child and the child now has a, suppression. Now the job of the, suppression, sharing is not to be there. The purpose is when something's suppressed, it's suppressed momentarily or temporarily moved and at some point in life it needs to be expressed in words.
For example, if someone has a, suppression, at a very young age and they don't process it, its hard for them to know, who you are. They don't work through the short stays inside the system, it's frozen inside the, muscle memory, in the, subconscious mind, of the brain. And what happens is they continue living with us. Now if they don't deal with it in their lifetime, that's obviously restoring the genes and is going to get passed on to the next generation.
Children don't do well at home, they don't become aware of it that's gonna get passed on, so we have something in our evolution that is already in inside of us to help us with, traumatic patterns. Some emotions are blocked, so when children are born later on life at some point they are triggered and that's what pushes the buttons of the parents.
When children start behaving in ways the parents don't like, I call the parent control we think wow my child is out of character. The child is not actually out of character, the child is just mirroring or expressing things that the parent doesn't want to see inside themselves and haven't processed within themselves.
Children will start acting out bringing forth, subconscious patterns, from their parents. A, guidance system, is your, spiritual journey, where you've got like a router or an angel or your higher self, and they're communicating with you. I like to call this the, inner guidance system, is the connection to your, true self, and finding out, who are you.
Your, guidance system, helps you connect to your, true self, when you're not connected to your, true self. When you're connected to yourself, you're able to distinguish in an instant, what is true and right for you versus what is not. In an instant, there is no debate in the mind. There's just a sense of yes or a sense of no. And it's not happening from a fear. It's not happening from a desire, it's happening from this, inner knowing.
These, beliefs, are part of our, belief system, there are, family patterns. So, an example with a, belief system. If you have a, belief system, I'm not worthy, how do you behave? If you're very insecure how do you behave? The other way is to trying to cover up the perceived unworthiness and show that you're worthy. The, belief system, I'm not worthy is a persona which is not you, it's just a, belief system.
This belief of unworthiness can develop into a, people pleaser. I'm a, people pleaser. The, people pleaser, that person owner's a person has developed in order not to feel the unworthiness.
Myrna: I get what you're saying a lot of times they say the extroverts are covering up some some deep down feeling as well that's why they need to be the life of the party.
Okay so alright so what we're talking about though is our, inner guidance system, and, knowing yourself. What you're saying is you let people understand that the personality that they're projecting to the world is not real. And you help them to connect to their, inner guidance system, to know themselves.
Letting your inner guidance system uncover who you are
Matheo: Right. So that's what I mean by, inner guidance system, is that you have a an innate intelligence telling you what's true and right for you right now. It tells you, who you are.
Myrna: So talk about whats behind, beliefs. I know we talked about that a little bit, but maybe we can expand on it a little bit by because you said, belief systems, are difficult to resolve. So so let's go with our example that we're talking about this person that, you know, doesn't feel that there were any.
So when you go into the training and coaching, you help them understand to peel away those layers and understand, who you are. They're maybe not feeling worthy because of something they inherited or maybe something somebody said to them 40 years ago, or whatever, you need to peel that back. But why do you think it's difficult for someone to resolve that specific, belief system?
Matheo: It is challenging working with a, belief system. A, belief system, was created a long time ago so around up to the age from conception up to the age of seven, eight years old our, belief systems, about ourselves and about life and about other people are formed.
How we perceive the world is being created, so this is at an age where the brain is just absorbing everything that is happening in the world and making associations. But a lot of people might rarely even get to that, belief system, because they're dealing with other, belief systems.
I developed a belief of I'm shy or a persona I'm shy. And because this happened at two years old, I grew up as a shy person, knowing that oh, I'm just shy, I'm just a quiet person, so I'll become an accountant and an auditor. Yeah, because I'm shy. So, who are you? Are you shy or an extrovert?
Train yourself to connect to your emotions, train your souls to connect to your body, so that you know how you feel at any time, whether it's good or bad emotions doesn't matter, connect to them. Allow yourself to have these emotions, because that's how you're going to go down into the, beliefs, and into the other aspects that are hidden inside of you.
And that's what we want to identify and remove what's hidden. Because when you remove what's hidden, then you start to become more and more free.
Myrna: And that's how you, know yourself, and find out, who you are. This is what we're talking about here. I had a short stint with a therapist. I talked to her for about a month or so, and one of the things I got from those sessions was not to stuff down my feelings but to catch them and breathe into them.
This has been an incredible conversation to highlight your skills highlight what you do for people. And I will tell you there's so many people that are walking around don't know, who they are. I don't want to use I use the word broken, but people become broken from past traumas. So what you what you're doing is phenomenal. Tell us how somebody can sign up or how you offer this training.
Matheo: The teachers that came before me and many researchers and scientists know that the subconscious runs our life. We're able to to retrain and recondition the subconscious, but doing it the correct way is important. We have to uncover what's causing In the subconscious mind to dictate our lives. So I put together the, Know Yourself teachings, and this essentially explains step by step how finding out, who you are, works, how thoughts become, beliefs, how emotions work.
Using your inner guidance system to find out who you are
Emotions, are like a garden system, we go in and out gamify. Not listening to your, inner guidance system, does not bring you back on track.
Myrna: So explain how our, internal guidance system, works when we're not listening to our own, inner guidance.
Matheo: I go through the five different ways that we take on stuff from our parents, help clients realize that there was are many patterns running their life. Many of them was the specifically looking at the, family patterns.
As a Certified a, Life Coach, I know that we can become, trapped, by past hurt. I am trained to help my clients look back at their, past, and find clues for their future. It is not that the, past, equals the future; but that it gives you an indication of how you respond to hurts and disappointments. For example: Do you tackle them head on and fight like Rocky Balboa, or do you fold up like an umbrella like your best girlfriend and let circumstances anchor you in life?
Out of the Snares, trapped by your past
In Chapter 2 of my book “Out Of The Snares” I share with my readers how I responded to a significant childhood hurt, child abuse. I used the analogy of a train traveling to a predetermined destination and hit something along the way and become derailed. That train can no longer continue on to that destination. Once derailed it is finished and we become, trapped.
I made the choice not to let the circumstances of my childhood, derail me. I choose to release, past, hurt. Instead, I chose to look at the positives that came out of that experience and allowed the lessons learned to shape me into the person I am today.
We all have a story, the successful people in life, succeed in spite of their story. I share secrets on how to use your story as the launching pad to fire you up. I teach you how to not become, trapped.
I show how the people that God placed in your life as a child, are there to teach you something. Just as in the story of Moses being raised by the Pharaoh's daughter until he was ready for God to use him to fulfill his purpose, all the people in your life and your, past, have strategic purposes.
How to Heal, Past, hurts
We all have a mother or mother figure who helped shape us into the women we are today – whether that person is a biological mother who gave birth to us, or a mother figure such as an older sister, aunt, stepmother, grandmother, or teacher. However, the reality is that no matter who you called “mother,” this woman held power over your development throughout your life, and she may not have been the mother you needed. Whether through intentional malice, physical or emotional abuse, or unintentionally through absence or other life circumstances, you may find yourself wounded by her actions — or lack of action. This, past, hurt, influences who you become and how you live, either, trapped, or free. Releasing, past, hurts stops the harmful impacts that can ripple through your relationships with a partner, children, and within yourself. It stops you from becoming, trapped, by these memories.
The take away from this chapter is that we all have a, past. Some more daunting than others, but under every cloud there is a silver lining. Success in life depends on how you chose to respond to the rain.
Remember that the same rain that causes the flood is the same rain that is responsible for the harvest.
The only way you can accept new joy and happiness into your life is to make space for it. If your heart is filled full-up with pain from, past, hurt, you can't be open to anything new.
1. Make the decision to let go of the, past.
Things don’t disappear on their own. You need to make the commitment to “let it go.” If you don’t make this conscious choice up-front, you could end up self-sabotaging any effort to move on from this, past hurt.
Making the conscious decision to let it go also means accepting you have a choice to let it go. To stop reliving the, past, pain, to stop going over the details of the story in your head every time you think of the other person (after you finish step 2 below). This is empowering to most people, knowing that it is their choice to either become, trapped, by the pain, or to live a future life without it.
2. Take responsibility and release blame for, past hurt.
Express the pain from, past hurt, whether it’s directly to the other person, or through just getting it out of your system (like venting to a friend, or writing in a journal, or writing a letter you never send to the other person). Get it all out of your system at once and take responsibility. Blame allows you to stay a victim. Doing so will also help you understand why specifically you are hurting.
We don’t live in a world of black and whites, even when sometimes it feels like we do. While you may not have had the same amount of responsibility for the hurt you experienced, there may have been a small part of the hurt that you are also partially responsible for. What could you have done differently next time? Are you an active participant in your own life, or simply a hopeless victim? Will you let your pain become your identity? Or will you become, trapped, by it.
Being the victim feels good — it’s like being on the winning team of you against the world. But guess what? The world largely doesn’t care, so you need to get over yourself. Yes, you’re special. Yes, your feelings matter. But don’t confuse with “your feelings matter” to “your feelings should override all else, and nothing else matters.” Your feelings are just one part of this large thing we call life, which is all interwoven and complex. And messy.
In every moment, you have that choice — to continue to feel bad about another person’s actions, or to start feeling good. You need to take responsibility for your own happiness, and not put such power into the hands of another person. Release the shackles and get out of the snares of blame. Why would you let the person who you feel is responsible for your, past hurt, have such power, right here, right now?
No amount of rumination of analyses have ever fixed a relationship problem. Never. Not in the entirety of the world’s history. So why choose to engage in so much thought and devote so much energy to a person who you feel has wronged you?
Now it’s time to let go. Let go of the past, and stop reliving it. Stop telling yourself that story where the protagonist — you — is forever the victim of this other person’s horrible actions. You can’t undo the past, all you can do is to make today the best day of your life.
When you focus on the here and now, you have less time to think about the past. When the past memories creep into your consciousness (as they are bound to do from time to time), acknowledge them for a moment. And then bring yourself gently back into the present moment. Some people find it easier to do this with a conscious cue, such as saying to yourself, “It’s alright. That was the past, and now I’m focused on my own happiness and doing .”
Remember, if we crowd our brains — and lives — with hurt feelings, there’s little room for anything positive. It’s a choice you’re making to continue to feel the hurt, rather than welcoming joy back into your life.
5. Forgive them and free yourself from being, trapped.
We may not have to forget another person’s bad behaviors, but virtually everybody deserves our forgiveness. Sometimes we get stuck in our pain and our stubbornness, we can’t even imagine forgiveness. But forgiveness isn’t saying, “I agree with what you did.” Instead, it’s saying, “I don’t agree with what you did, but I forgive you anyway.”
How to let your, desires flow, out of you. We can become like the, Alchemist, and transform our desires and let our, desires flow, out of us when we realize that we are abundant.
Whether it's a relationship, whether it's a job whether it's travel, whatever is your most intimate, desire, we've been teaching you, me and my co-host miss Margo Blake has been teaching you how to achieve the, Alchemy of Desire, which is the magical transformation of thoughts into manifestation.
Today I want to conclude with now that you've got it how
to flow with it so we're calling this episode “How to let your, desires flow”
How to let your desires flow
Knowing what you want, and once you know what you want in order to activate it you need to put some emotion to it and that is how you activate the, Law of Attraction.
Using the, energy of desire, to create something magical.
Put your attention on your, desires, so that you can light your, desires, on fire!
How to keep what you now have
What you have in your hands need some work, you just don't get it and then you don't have to do anything else.
Relationships, require work, and most people have a false sense of entitlement.
They feel that it is enough that they are just there in the relationship and
all they have to do is show up or come home every night and they feel that
they're doing something. People think that you should love them as they are
and they don't need any work or they don't need to make any changes.
I remember one of my ex-husband's actually saying this to me.
A few months after we were married I asked him to take more care with his
Appearance and hygiene because he was walking around looking like he was homeless and this was his response and I quote
“This is what you bought and you can't send it back”
A lot of people feel that hey you picked me, you bought me, you got into a relationship with me, so you must be okay with how I am, and you know you gotta put up or shut up. But that does not lead to a healthy relationship.
Your desires need work to manifest
Some ask why do I have to do all this work? I have heard people say it's either a fit or it's or it's not. Why try to force a square peg in a round hole? Good question. It's true, that there are some square pegs that definitely do not need to be forced into a round hole because it's never gonna fit right; but we're not talking about the obvious misfits. We're talking about couples have some synergy. They have love but they just got to do a little bit of work.
We all know the spouse or a partner that just comes home and turn on the TV and pay his partner no attention. Those are the ones were talking about. Relationships, needs work to keep them fresh and healthy.
When, relationships, are not fresh and healthy, couples then become roommates and it's never more evident as when you go to your partner and you say “Hey this is not working out, I think we should we should go our separate ways and they say sure why not. They agree!
My gosh that is like a slap in your face or like someone throwing a cold bucket of water on you! That is not the response you want but; that's what happens when the relationship Ebbs and Ebbs and nobody pays any attention and you're now just roommates. What has happened is that your partner has emotionally checked out a long time ago and they're just there for I don't know, finances, the children or whatever the reason. You have to let your, desires flow.
When you break up with someone you want them
to miss you. You want them to chase you. You don't want them to say.
“Sure, why not!”. That's not the response that we should get when
we're trying to terminate a relationship right?
When desire stop flowing
I remember reading Gabrielle Union's book We're Going To Need More Wine” and she told the story a very sad story about the night she had a fight with her first husband. She describes this relationship as feeling like you are driving towards a brick wall yet being incapable of mashing on the breaks! Her marriage was going down the tank for a long time but she didn't want to give up on it.
So, she told the story about a night she had a fight with her husband one of their many fights and she ran out the house in the middle of the night, four o'clock in the morning or some ridiculous time like that. She expected her husband to chase her because you know your husband should be worried about you, he's supposed to be to protect you!
Gabriel ended up sitting by a tree and falling asleep. When she woke up in the morning she was sure that her husband was worried about her and called the cops. She expected to find cops all over her house when she got home. Instead she found her husband fast asleep.
That's when she realized there was no hope for her marriage. Her husband's, desire, for her had stopped flowing.
What can you do to keep desires flowing
So ladies and gentlemen, Ask yourself what do you bring to the table?
You now have the object of your affection, you won. He or she is now yours what are you going to do to keep him or her?
Ladies maybe you were a seductress and got the man interested, now what? What else you got?
One quality will bring someone to the table and even make them fall in love with you but it will not keep them. It will not hold them.
Lots of people love others, but can't live with them.
Lot of couples divorce yet are still in love, that is because you need a pairing of attractive qualities.
A one hat trick is not going to be enough in the long run.
Ladies, You know that there is a long line of seductress waiting around the corner to entice your man.
Men if all you got, is that you are the provider, well all your woman has to do is look to the left or right and find another man with a job and he can replace you.
What is your unique paring? What make your, desires flow?
This information was the reason I went through 4 husbands.
They all had one thing but not the unique pairing I required to hold me.
I will tell you it took me almost 30 years to find it in my current relationship.
My unique paring was ambition and genuine caring. Caring for me and my daughter.
When you get this unique paring you get not only an attraction but you get an addiction.
The “and” is what makes you difficult to replace.
What I would like to do now is play for you an except from one of the relationship experts I interviewed on this show to add some context to our conversation. Ms Inez Bracy is a coach and author of Rejuvenate your life: 21 days to feel like a woman again.
1. Meditation
Your journey begins whenever you say it is. Meditation allows you to connect to your inner self and let your, desires flow, out of you.
Now is this moment if you decide this second yeah this makes perfect sense to me. I am going to do something to start changing my life.
If you decide that that's perfect and you go into silence and into meditation, being still, whatever it is you desire to change will reveal itself to you. It will come in a way where you are given steps to take.
Now I can tell you this when that comes, it is going to come very quietly, it's not going to be loud and boisterous, it's going to tell you perhaps you should do this or that.
2. Celebration
The next thing that I enjoy is celebrations. Celebrate something every single day and that's what my blissful living challenge is all about. So many times we can get caught up in everything that's going on around us. Almost like a vortex we get just sucked into it; but if you've ever been around a baby, small babies or under two years old. Up to that age the baby's just gurgles and giggles and they are just so happy.
I imagine it now.
Being blissful allows your desires to flow. They have no reason not to be. We lose that along the way from boundaries and everything else that comes along. When we lose that we get to recapture and reclaim it because it is our birthright. Babies come in the world with it. We could to reclaim our birthright and no matter what is going on in our environment, we can still choose bliss.
3. Vibration Frequency
The more you start to celebrate, the more you lift your vibrations and The more you sing, the more you dance, the less often you will have to shovel; because your vibrational energy is at a point now where it's attracting to you those things that are good. This level of vibration is higher so you're going to be attracting love, you're going to be attracting Joy, you're going to be attracting bliss.
Yes, I talk about gratitude like that but; I guess it's the same word be grateful for what you have regardless of what's lacking. Don't concentrate on what you don't have. Concentrate on what you want. So that you can raise your vibrational frequency and attract good things.
So, yes celebrating having gratitude very important.
4. Vision
Another thing is to visualize. To live in a space of visualization to write out what it is you want. When I'm working with my clients, I say to them I desire you get to write out your vision for your life. Where do you want to live?
How does it look? How does it show up?
Sit down and see yourself in the theater of your mind. On your own stage and you're the actor and the producer!
Write out your vision for your life.
5. Woulda, Shoulda, Coulda
We can spend our entire lives lamenting Woulda, Shoulda, Coulda and that's all in the past. All in the past, it's already happened or didn't happen. Those words have no value to this present moment. They have no value to your future either.
So you should begin to eliminate woulda coulda shoulda from your vocabulary
What is the, foundation of happiness? We live in a culture where, happiness, is largely based on external forces. Like, what did we get and what did we achieve? And that's basically your, foundation of happiness. And when our life conditions don't match your expectations, we experience pain and fear. We suffer and become unhappy.
But imagine what it would feel like if you could create a constant sense of, inner peace, and freedom and live each day in a beautiful state. Hi, I'm Coach Myrna young and welcome to, Five minute Fridays with Coach Myrna. I want to ask you what's preventing you from, happiness, and living in a state of, peace and joy?
I remember watching the, happiness movie, once. And this was a documentary that was recorded in India, where people who are living on maybe $100 a year living in huts with just covering over their head, most of them sleeping on rocks on the floor. And they were, happy. And this is why this was so unusual in the documentary.
It looked at the, foundation of happiness, what is happiness, and what causes, happiness. The end result of what that movie was trying to show was that it doesn't matter how poor you are, it doesn't matter if you don't have a lot of money. What matters most to the people and the, foundation of happiness, is family, and love.
Happiness, is making sure your children are safe and things like that. Research shows that 85% of our, happiness, comes from our, relationships. It's not just, relationships, with people, it's, relationship, with God as well. If you don't believe in God, then your, relationship, with the planet and the universe becomes important, but that is basically how we find, true happiness.
The, foundation of happiness, is living a life of peace and joy. Now, there's a time when I believed that your spouse, or your children or your boss, or somebody was responsible for our, happiness, but nobody can be responsible for your, happiness. I remember when Jennifer Gardner told the world that Ben Aflec was not responsible for her, happiness. He was not the foundation of her happiness. of course they broke up because he was cheating on her with the nanny but even though she was hurt her, happiness, did not come from external sources and events.
Definition of happiness
Nobody can be responsible for our, happiness. You think that you're going to be happy when you get a husband or when you get that new car or that new job. But once you get, what you find is when you get these things, you're not really happy, because, happiness, only comes from internal sources, and I personally found that the, definition of happiness, is correct.
It's true.
The, definition of happiness, is working towards a goal or purpose.
And that's where my, happiness, comes from. My ,happiness, comes from me trying to excel in what I do. I am a host on a radio program, podcast, I'm a lifecoach. Things that I am working towards, in order to better myself. I learn something new every day because, I practice CANI which is constant and never ending improvement. And when I find that I'm growing then I'm happy.
Good, personal relationships, enhances my life, when you're fighting with your husband you're not thinking of what you don't have in your life. When you're in the lack mode, you really can't access your, inner peace, and joy that actually brings you, happiness. So I want you to discover what's holding you back from, happiness.
What's holding you back from being happy. I would like to encourage you to tap in to, inner peace, with, meditation, and, mindfulness, and start living in the, present moment, because, happiness, can only be found in the present moment. That is the, foundation of happiness, being in the present moment. Not in the past, not in the future.
Take the time to sit with your feelings of unhappiness, or pain, or regret. And maybe you can even try to find a lesson in it. Because there's a test in every testimony. So try to find what the universe or God was trying to teach you with that circumstances that you said, made you unhappy. And then once you sit with it, and feel the pain and not trying to, self medicate, with drugs or food or sex or whatever you do to try to feel better.
You just sit with the painful feelings. When you sit with it, then you you will find that you can stop the pain and allow life to unfold in the beautiful way that it was meant to be. One of the things I do to stop the minor irritations in my personal life and that are trying to take my joy and peace away is to breathe deeply.
People will always irritate you. My little irritation comes when I call my husband, and he doesn't pick up the phone, and I'm wondering why he can't hear the phone, or my kids leave the house and not tell me where they're going and I think it's disrespectful. So I've learned to do something that's called R&R which is, relax and release. And what this is, I breathe in deeply and relax and then I breathe out through my mouth and release it out.
If you do this breathing method for a few minutes, then you will find that that irritation is no longer there. And the next time that person does that same thing, then you're actually not going to get irritated because you caught it. Caught it and you relaxed and you released it.
Conclusion
So that is all for today's five minutes with Coach Myrna. I hope that I shared a few things on, happiness foundation, and maybe you can start doing some of these things. In order for you to, be happy. Remember, happiness, is not from external sources. It is only from your internal peace or moving towards a goal or desire. What you moving towards it, you're in alignment with the universe and you will be happy. So until next time, Namaste
Bob Doyle, from, the Secret, teaches that we need to do more than concentrate on our, vibration, and, vision boards, for, the law of attraction, to work. We must, rewire our brains. He teaches that the metaphysical aspects of, the law of attraction, or the “reality creation” process is what controls our experiences.
Bob Doyle is best known for his contribution to the film and book “The Secret” as a law of attraction expert and coach. He has been teaching these principles through programs, live events, podcasts, live streams, coaching, writing, and even virtual reality, since 1988. He is driven by his passion for creative self-expression and his work is heavily focused on helping people decide whom they want to be and how they want to express themselves.
Recently Bob's attention has shifted from the metaphysical aspects of the, law of attraction, or reality creation process to a more grounded and biological look at what controls our experiences…our, brain.
The Law of Attraction and the Secret
Myrna: After 20 years, why to shift away from the, law of attraction, and, the Secret?
Bob: So, after, the Secret, especially, a lot of people got in the game, the law of attraction, experts were putting out their programs and a lot of them didn't really have the research or experience. They were sort of regurgitating what they got from, the Secret, or had heard. And what happened was that people got very confused about this, law of attraction. Some of them who had not heard of it before, the Secret, got understandably excited about it.
They thought this is how I'm going to get everything I want in my life. I want to learn more about it. So, they go out in the world, and they start learning about it. And they're learning all of these techniques and they're learning about, vibration, and resistance and vibrational resonance, and all this stuff. They're learning about, vision boards, and lists and, visualization, and the whole thing. It's a lot that they're trying to figure out and they're trying all of these different techniques and they're so focused on getting the, law of attraction, right, that they're putting almost no focus on the most important thing, which is who do they need to be to attract those things.
When it is through who we're being, that things happen in the world, our action is expressed the things we say, the thing how we make meaning in the world is all at all a factor of our, brains wiring. So, our experience of reality is all based on how our, brain, is processing this ocean of energy. So, if we're not getting the results that we want in our life, it’s ultimately a factor of our, brains wiring. So, the reason I'm shifting from, law of attraction, to changing your, brains wiring, in terms of a focus for teaching and coaching and, transformation, is because there's nothing to get confused about.
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You don't have to worry about all the processes and the techniques and getting it wrong and self-doubt and all of that stuff. That's it, and that's proven science. So how do we change your, brain, so that you can become the person that get the results or attract the results you want?
Myrna: That's awesome. I do believe that again. I'm one of the ones that went after, the Secret, trying to understand, the law of attraction, and the, vision boarding, and, vibration. But what you're saying is that if you keep your thoughts clean, and your energy positive, the law of attraction, is not going to work for you unless you, rewire the brain.
Bob: No, it's not so, this is the problem. We're getting into this, law of attraction, it’s always working. It's always working and the focus that we're putting on it is confusing the issue. We don't need to understand how gravity works for the glass to fall when we let go of it. We also don't need to understand how, the law of attraction, works. What we need to do is focus on what action we need to take every day so that, the law of attraction, works automatically. Everything in your life, you're attracting it, because you're on this sort of default way of being. It's an, autopilot.
You may not think of it that way. But because of your, brain's wiring, you're not consciously looking at how can you improve your wiring, you're probably going on, autopilot. And all of those, autopilot, behaviors are getting results in the world, that result in your reality. So different results come from different action, different ways of being.
Myrna: right. Okay, so we're talking about, rewiring the brain, but we're talking also about energy and, vibration. I'm trying to understand it for the people that are believed that the energy and vibration is responsible for attracting before we get onto the rewiring.
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Bob: Let me make clear that I am not against any of that, I stood for these principles for 20 years and I still believe them the vibration, the energy, the resonant. That's all there. The problem and it the magic, if you will, the invisible stuff, but all of those results in the universe presenting you with something. Now you have to act, what you've been presented, what are you going to do with it and what action can you take that will affect your, vibration, and send out the stuff all the cool, Law of Attraction, stuff. But if we focus so much on the magic issue or the invisible issue or energy, we're not rewiring our, brain.
Myrna: Alright, so that's a good a good segue into how does rewiring the, brain, help us with manifesting in the, law of attraction?
Bob: So, right now we're manifesting totally on, autopilot. For the most part, most people are manifesting is because of their, autopilot wiring, and their behaviors. So, if we want to manifest something different, then we have to focus on changing the wiring within us that will create the action that will get those results. Okay. So, rewiring, is fundamental. The whole premises of this whole conversation is that permanent, transformation. Transformation, does not happen unless the brain is rewired.
If we're not consciously reinforcing all of that, and we're allowing our old triggers to take us back into our old patterns, then we were not going to grow new neural pathways. They're going to be in a permanent place that's going to create new, autopilot behavior.
Myrna: So, I know what you're saying. That's why they're saying that motivation is so good because you're excited for a second, and there's no deep, transformation. Right, exactly. So, I know that you know, in our conversation, that you have a quiz that people can do to get this process started of, rewiring the brain, so you want to talk about it now.
Bob: Yeah, so the very first question is does my behavior is dictated by my wiring? I want to rewire how do I begin, right, like that makes sense. So, to really effectively, rewire the brain, you need to know where your current wiring is, so that you can recognize it when it's at play. And then you can consciously override it. That is the process that's required here. We're going to need to consistently override the old wiring, old thought process.
We're going to need to physically take different actions, we're going to have to consciously make new meaning, but for us to be able to do that we have to be able to see that we're on, autopilot, in the first place. So that's where I created this quiz. And it's called the, transformation personality type quiz. So, it's not your typical, personality type, that's out there in the corporate world. This is something I totally created just for myself based on my own experience. 20 years of dealing with people who are trying to transform that they fall into one of these or more one or more of these four types, personality types, when it comes to, personal transformation.
So, there's nothing wrong with any of these types. And just because you are one of these types, it doesn't mean that you're going to sabotage or slow your efforts. However, if you are a person who has been working on this for a while, and it seems like it should be here by now, then this is this is something you can do to try to figure out what behaviors might I have in going that are stopping me?
So, the quiz identifies the, personality type. It explains the behaviors that type has that can cause self-sabotage, and then offers very specific things you can do instead. So, I invite anybody reading this, it only takes 60 seconds to take the quiz and it's free. They can go to www.TPTquiz.com. Just as multiple choice they'll know their type. They'll have a video they can watch. They there's a PDF they'll get that explains more about their type and then what they can do about it.
But we can also talk about briefly, you know the four types here so that they if they do take the quiz, then they can you know, they can understand that we're talking about them.
Myrna: Okay, briefly, what are what are the four types?
Bob: So, let's assume that they went in took the quiz and now they're back. Now the number one type most popular is the, seeker type.
The Seeker Brain
The, seeker type, is a person who is very committed to their, personal transformation. They really want the best in their life. And so, to do that, they try everything that comes along. There's nothing wrong with having that kind of wild enthusiasm and curiosity. However, if you're trying to implement something, a process, a new way of thinking, a structured way of thinking that is going to create wiring in your, brain, you got to stay consistent.
You can't just keep flip flopping from approach to approach you're giving your brain no time to grow anything. Remember it's a biological process that starts with thought and intention and consent continues with consistency.
Number two – the skeptic, obviously wants the best in their life, but maybe they've been burned a few times with this when things didn't show up the way they thought and they made that mean that oh nothing really works. So, the skeptic, while committed to, transformation, generally looks at an opportunity for change. And the question they have internally is, why won't this work for me?
And when you ask yourself or the universe a question like that, you're going to get those answers. If you ask the different questions, you’ll get different answers. So, the same skeptical person who is a, skeptic, they don't want to be duped. They want to be intellectual and logical about this can ask a different question, get different results, and then actually allow themselves to take action. And it's just the opposite of the question they automatically ask.
So instead of saying, why won't this work for me, they asked How could this work for me? And leave us all their intellect in logic and see how I could work? Because if they keep asking themselves the wrong question, they'll never take action. They'll get to be right about how it will work because they'll never get a result. And the law and the logical the skeptical, brain, likes to be right they don't want to look stupid.
The next personality type is – the wizard. The Law of Attraction, community feels, the skeptic, is all logic and the, wizard, is all invisible trust and magic. Rituals, vision boards, the list, visualization, they're just conjuring mentality like I'm using the, law of attraction, to change the energy of the universe so that they will do my bidding, rather than changing themselves. This is where the, alchemy, needs to begin. And then the universe will respond to you, you have to be a cause.
So, the wizard, brain, and all of their rituals helps it's what you were talking about. There is the energy, there is the, vibration. All this stuff is happening. It's sending stuff out there, if you will, but it also needs to be affecting who you are being in the world. You cannot just sit cross legged and be your, wizard, in your cave and not show the world how you are now this new person.
So, the wizardry, brain, needs to be around visioning yourself as this ultimate, wizard. you that's what you're conjuring, not the stuff, not the money, you're conjuring the best version of who will take the action to get those things.
The Heartbreaker Brain
The last one is the – heartbreaker, brain. The, heartbreaker, is the, people pleaser. And the, people pleaser, is someone who really wants to transform and I know that this happens for a lot of people. They stop their progress when the people around them start to get uncomfortable. Start to comment, what are you doing, who do you think you are? Or in some other way, add a negative layer of emotion to your journey.
And so, for whatever your reasons you stop, whether it's to make them comfortable, yourself comfortable or whatever, you stop your journey. Now, a lot of times it is so that mom will be uncomfortable. You won't make that person mad. You're trying to keep everybody comfortable.
Transform your Mind Podcast Index
Neuroplasticity of the brain
Myrna: All right. How does, neuroplasticity, fit in into, rewiring the brain? Can you make the connection for us?
Bob: Well, neuroplasticity, is the brain's ability to rewire. So, in essence, it's the same thing. So, neuroplasticity, there's a there's neurogenesis or the ability to grow new brain cells and all those other things, and then, neuroplasticity, which is the ability for it to change. And that's really all we're focused on. There's a lot of people out there in the community, the personal development communities, we're talking about the, brain, now who might have been talking to, law of attraction, before I'm not the only one.
And a lot of these people will go very deep into the parts of the, brain, and how this is all happening. Personally, I'm intentionally not doing that because I'm afraid that what's going to happen is people are going to get focused on that again, just like they were all, the law of attraction, stuff. We weren't meant to have to understand all of us.
We weren't born into this human experience with all this amazing creative potential that we have needing to know all the ins and outs of the biology and how it works. We don't need to know that. All we need to know is that this right here is a reality creation machine. And all we need to do is feed it the vision that we want for ourselves and then move and act and be in alignment with the person who would have that vision and it will all just take care of itself.
But we are adults and just waking up to this we have to understand we have a lifetime wiring a lifetime and it doesn't seem like wiring. It just seems like our truth. And so, anything radically outside of our truth, we're going to have conflict with it. It doesn't fit into our normal paradigm. But we can look past that and see that in the world.
There are people who have the success and the things that we want. It is possible but they are being something different. You don't have to be them. But there is certain action that they're taking, certain ways of being that they are that have brought them those results. It's not magic. It's the result of logical action that you're taking.
Rewiring the brain on autopilot
Myrna: You said something earlier that I want to connect the dots, because you're talking about, rewiring the brain, but that can also be the same thing as, reprogramming. And we're all programmed, by the time we're seven years old, in order to be erase the tape, then we have to, rewire the brain. So, once they take the quiz and then become conscious of their programming. Because 95% of people are not conscious of their programs.
The, Law of Attraction, is working all the time, consciously or unconsciously. What are you thinking? What do you say? I don't want this. That's what's going to show up. What do you say I want this, maybe sometimes it shows up. Whatever is happening to us is that we're recreating it. So, talk a little bit about, autopilot.
Bob: Well, autopilot, if we do not wake up to our wiring to see that we are in fact program. We can probably see some program behavior, we do rituals every day and so on, but how we make meaning out of our lives and how that causes us to take action or not take action. If we don't wake up to that then we are by default on, autopilot, which means we're literally robots just reacting to stimuli based on the wiring that we've the programming that we've been given that we have mostly, subconsciously, just led in without too much critical thinking or evaluating.
So now everything we're doing is on, autopilot, for the most part, even though sometimes it feels like we're making a conscious decision. What is driving that decision? It's probably some, unconscious wiring, that hasn't been properly evaluated, especially if it is in some way limiting you from moving forward toward your dreams. So, we're all running on some sort of, autopilot, until we realize that we are and start being conscious about it.
So, then we get conscious about it for a while, long enough for new neural pathways to form and now we have a new, autopilot, and that, autopilot, is manifesting on a different level. It's creating different results because we visualize what we need to do. We take that action, we make different meaning, we don't buy into old limiting stories. So much of a part of this is giving up all of our old stories.
Beliefs and the Brain
Myrna; The old stories, you're talking about beliefs?
Bob: Beliefs, like my dad did this, or I've lived here and I didn't have this and bla bla bla all the reasons, all the sad stories. And the thing is this, yeah, if you keep hanging on to those, beliefs, you will always be a prisoner of them. You have to let them go and tell yourself a new story. Because most of what you're telling yourself in this story that is affecting you and causing you to not take action, is a lie.
Anyway, its interpretation is something you made up based on some action that did occur. How you move forward in your life is something that you made up based on your wiring. So, we want to create wiring in the, brain, that moves you in the action that you need to take to get what you want.
Myrna: How can readers learn more about your program and what you offer. How you help people, rewire their brain?
Bob: Well, the quiz is a good front door to everything, because then we all know where we stand. I know how to help you, and you could use some assistance, so that is a good way to get it. After you take the quiz, you'll learn about our boundless living challenge, which is where I do the work with people. It's an online community. They have 45 days of new content every day that's real short and concise. They know exactly what to do every day.
They have tools to deal with the emotional spikes that come with all of this rewiring process. They have coaching on a regular basis. All the things I know after 20 years of coaching people actually helps people make a change, isn't it? If they just want to know more general stuff about me there's www.meetBobdoyle.com that just my website, you can get to the quiz from there as well. And then you can also see how I coach and train and some of the other stuff that I'm doing.
Moses, was a murderer and David was an adulterer and a murderer. They are the most talked about men in the Bible. Their mistakes did not affect their, miracles. Maybe it was God’s, strategy, to use their painful pasts to get them in the right, mindset, for him to use them for his glory.
Your background prepares you for your, miracle.
Whenever you survive, struggle, and God, made a way out of no way, you get stronger. When the next challenge comes your way, you say I have been through this before so I can handle this. Sometimes the, struggle, reveals your faith.
I have been cheated on before, if I made it through that, I can make it through this. You have to have the tenacity to say:
I been through the fire, but it didn’t burn me. I been through the, divorce, having no money in the bank, sickness but I am still standing. I went through the fire, but it did not consume me.
Pain teaches you how to fight for your kids, for your marriage, for your finances.
Jesus said “No one takes my life; I lay it down.” Don’t give anyone the permission to keep you down, use that, pain, as your fuel and let it reveal your, purpose.
The book, The Alchemist, teaches that we all have beginners luck when we decide to pursue our, personal legend, but before we realize it we will be tested. God will send some, pain. It will feel like going through a hail storm with the universe throwing rocks at you to determine how badly you want to win. Most will fold up and say it is too hard, it is too dangerous, it is too scary etc. That is why they say the richest place on earth is the graveyard because most die with their gifts unused.
Have you heard Tyler Perry’s story? Tyler Perry put on plays for 2 years and nobody came. The seats were empty but he continued. He even started living in his car because he had no money for rent. He was spending all his money on renting the facilities to put on his plays. He used his pain to reveal his purpose.
One day someone called him. (Your blessings will always find you.) and wanted to partner with him. He agreed and they planned an event but it turned out to be the coldest night in Atlanta he thought the seats would be empty again. He was surprised to see the long lines of people waiting to get into the theatre.
Because he pushed through the, pain, he knew that he had found his, purpose. That was the start of his success. He never looked back. He is now in the self-made billionaire club
It was Gods, strategy, to teach, Tyler Perry, how to be successful. He passed the test, can you?
How can the, Law of Attraction for couples, help you to thrive at home and at work? NYT best selling author Christy Whitman talks about thriving in your relationships this week on the “Transform your Mind with Coach Myrna” podcast.
Christy is the author of “Quantum Success 7 essential laws, for a thriving joyful and prosperous relationship with your work and money”
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Christie Whitman is a Transformational Leader, Celebrity coach, New York Times bestselling author twice, one for “The Art of Having it All” and the second for “Taming your Alpha Bitch” I love that title! Christy has appeared on The Today Show, the Morning Show, and her works have been featured in People's magazine, Seventeen, Women's Day, Hollywood Life, and Teen Vogue among others.
Christie is the CEO and founder of the Quantum Success Learning Academy and Quantum Success Coaching Academy a 12-month, Law of Attraction, coaching certificate program. Christie has helped thousands of people through her empowerment seminars, speeches and coaching sessions, and products.
Christi's life-changing message reached over 200,000 people a month, and her work has been promoted by and featured with esteem authors and luminaries such as Marianne Williamson, Dr. Dwayne Dwyer, Marci Shimoff,Brian Tracy, Neil Donald Walsh, Abram Hicks, and Louise Hay. She currently lives in Arizona with her husband Frederic and there are two boys Alexander and Maxim.
Christy's Journey as a Law of Attraction for Couples Coach
Myrna – That’s was a very impressive Bio. I loved reading it. As a, life coaching podcast, I am always interested in my listeners learning life skills from my guests stories. You've done a lot, you're quite accomplished. Can you give us a little bit of your backstory? Tell us your journey to becoming a successful, Law of Attraction for couples, leader and, quantum success, coach .
Christy – Sure, I always had the drive to be successful, and worked with the, law of attraction, back in day about 20 years ago, before I found the other universal laws, I did what it took to take action. I had perseverance. I went after the things that I wanted. I was able to focus, using the, law of attraction for couples, but whenever I got there, I never felt satisfied.
Using the Law of Attraction for Couples to Bring you Happiness
I never felt happy, never felt like it was enough. So no matter what I accomplished, it just didn't good. When I actually accomplished something great, it actually would feel the opposite. I remember almost feeling let down, like okay well I was supposed to have this epiphany. I was supposed to have this, amazing feeling. I would never find that feeling of satisfaction.
When I learned more about, the law of attraction for couples, about 21 years ago, I really learned about how your thoughts create your reality. I had already been successful and I had a great career going. I was making money and yet, just wasn't satisfied. I just felt like all the things that I was told would make me happy it wasn't working and I was starting to think like what's wrong with me.
I thought if I had money, if I had the career, if I had a boyfriend, if I had this great body, look a certain way, then I would be happy, and none of the outer things were doing it for me. It was when I found a sense of myself, through meditation on the, law of attraction for couples, and through really returning to myself, stopped focusing outward on everything and everyone outside of me, a healthy selfish me.
I found I was coming back to myself. I started paying attention to the thoughts that I was thinking, that was activating, the law of attraction for couples, and how I was feeling and what I really came to understand, what my body of work really has been now, is that I have to be very mindful of that no matter what situation we're in, we can always find peace.
How to Have it All using the, Law of Attraction
How the Law of Polarity interacts with the Law of Attraction
The law of Polarity, there's a lot of things to appreciate and be grateful for. That's what my bodywork has been. My whole training for last 21 years has been really sensing within myself where I am. Thinking thoughts of lack and limitation, where I comparing myself to other people. I look at other people and go oh my GOD, there's so much more successful than me and then start feeling bad about myself and feeling like what I've accomplished is not enough.
Or do I compare myself to what other people are making? Or what impacts are my thought having? Those are times to check myself, look for what's right and good about my life and about my family and everything in my life versus what's wrong and bad.
These are a different training and a different mindset to come from a perspective of abundance instead of lack and limitation, and that's really where my internal work has been. Each time I shift up belief, a thought, a perspective from lack and limitation to one of abundance, my life just expands and explodes.
So those are the principles that I write about in my new book, Quantum Success, is that we're all searching for some type of success, and the accolades. You know what society says is this is accomplished, then you'll feel successful and a lot of people get there, and they feel empty, they feel like that it doesn't have much meaning in their lives or they're not feeling satisfied or fulfilled.
The truth is that as long as we're chasing things outside of ourselves we're always projecting our happiness or our fulfillment outside of ourselves. Fulfillment is never outside of ourselves, it's within ourselves and it's in the present moment. where all of our power exists.
How does The Law of Attraction for Couples Help in Relationships
Myrna – My first question is How does understanding your belief system help women and men who are functioning at high levels in their career or own their own business, but they're still struggling to find contentment or happiness? How does understanding the, law of attraction for couples, help? How does understanding, quantum success, principles help in relationships?
Christy – Our beliefs are one of the ways that we create. I mean when you think about it, when we have a belief and there is such a conviction that this is so, that this is the way it is, we will create that's what we are expecting to receive. It's what we are expecting life to give us. We can't create outside of our beliefs. If we believe that something good is going to happen, we then create something good.
There's an underlying belief that what we are creating we the deserve. We're not deserving or whatever it is; but we are always creating attracting things from the beliefs that we hold and here's the good news. If we look at our lives and we're not satisfied, we need to shift what we're not satisfied about. Look at what the contrast is in our life, what we don't want and allow that to be the springboard for what we do want.
I always ask myself when I'm finding a situation or circumstance happening in my life, I always ask myself what would I have to believe in order to create this? How does understanding the, law of attraction, facilitate my knowledge?
How Journaling helps Relationships
It's an empowering question. I recommend even journaling about it because a lot of times if you sit there and if you haven't done this practice before, you will not come up with an answer. I would take 10 mins with paper and I would journal. In order to create this situation what would I have to believe? What would I have to think? What would I have to be feeling in order to attract this?
You become more self-aware. I mean it's really the process of self-awareness and when we can slow down enough to pay attention to ourselves, that is the richest thing that we can do. Not only are we connecting with ourselves, which most of us don't do these days we're so busy with so much going on our lives, we need to take the time to slow down and connect with our own self, to know ourselves, to know what you believe about this and that. Beliefs are not either right or wrong. This is a, life coaching podcast, so I will answer with life coaching tips.
I love when you said that most people are not conscious. As a Guyanese, I want this to also be a, Guyana podcast, Most people including Guyanese people, do not understand the, law of attraction, You use the word self-awareness which is another term for consciousness. I've spent a lot of time with that word in meditation and being aware. I live in higher consciousness, personal development, yet at my level right now, I will not be able to look at a situation and figure out how I created it.
I'm not there yet, but I'm in the less than 1% of the world that actually are working on self-awareness, consciousness and, personal development, As a, life coaching podcast, I teach my clients basically that whatever they want, they can create. It starts with their thoughts and starts with their belief system. You and I are both, personal development, coaches and one of the first things I do in my coaching sessions, the first couple of weeks is basically we talk about beliefs and we look back at past behaviors. You can actually figure out what you believe from how you have navigated situations in your past.
The Law of Attraction for Couples and the Universal Laws
What exactly is the, Law of Attraction, and why is it important to know the universal laws and, quantum success? The, Law of Attraction for couples, for me when I learned about it completely changed my life and the reason that they completely changed my life or that my life completely changed is because they're for me like knowing the rules of the game or knowing the recipe to a really good cake or you know the plans to build a house.
I always say how successful would you be if you were going to go play baseball and you never saw the game before? You never knew how it was played? You don't know what the rules are. Someone hands you a bat and says okay hit the ball. You can’t play the game if you don’t understand the rules of the game. What to do when you hit the ball? How can you get thrown out etc.
Life is similar, you have to learn the rules of the game, you have to learn the playbook. The first step is about learning these, essential universal laws and the, law of attraction, and applying them so that you become the deliberate creator of your life instead of being a victim of circumstances. There's always going to be some kind of circumstance or situation or event or person that shapes our experiences.
It's what we do with those experiences the perspectives that we hold, that will determine what we continue to attract in our lives. So the more you learn about these, essential laws of the universe and, the law of attraction. Knowing these universal laws is knowing the rules of the game.
The Seven Universal Laws
I try to make myself a million dollars by working with the, law of attraction, and the seven essential universal laws. We live in a vibratory universe, our universe is all about vibration. Modern science and quantum physics have now proven that everything from a human being to a rock is full of energy. Everything is energy, our thoughts our feelings, what we say, what we do, everything is coming out of us like an energy tower and we as an individual person are sending out energy signals all day every day.
The, Law of Attraction, is just matching those signals that we send out, and giving us more of the same. Now it's not a tit-for-tat kind of thing, it's not like oh I told someone they were a jerk and now someone's going to call me on a jerk. It's not like that literal, but if you're sending out negative vibes you could be in traffic and someone could cut you off and you're experiencing road rage, that negativity for example that wave of negativity will then cast out a returning wave of negativity to you.
So we have to be mindful about the energy that we are sending out. The thoughts that we think, the language we use. We don't feel good when we're sending bad vibes out, so using feelings helps makes for better choices.
For example, language like I choose not to put up with this marriage anymore. I choose not to be treated like that anymore. I choose not to waste my money or spend my money on this right now. Those are more empowering ways and languages that we can use that actually do make a difference in what we attract. The, Law of Attraction for couples, is really a mirror reflection. I like to think of it as a boomerang, it's like what you're sending out it's coming back to you.
The most important law from the seven essential laws of the universe, I believe is the, Law of Sufficiency and Abundance. This law states that everything in the universe is abundant. Most of us are experiencing abundance of lack or pain or suffering, but the universe is always going to give us an abundance.
If you look at nature and look at trees you can't say we can't possibly count the amount of leaves that are on a tree or how many waves crash up again against the shore in the ocean, or count the raindrops that are coming down from the sky. The universe has always functioned in abundance, and to get what you want from the law is called sufficiency and abundance, it's being in a satisfied place.
It's coming from sufficiency. You get there by appreciating and looking for the good. In your life right now, in any situation, I don't care what it is you can find the good things about it. The law of Polarity says that every subject is really two subjects, it's the halving of it, or the not having of it. It's the lack of it or the abundance of it, and when we can deliberately choose how we want to focus, what we want to believe, what we want to appreciate, or not.
How Gratitude engages the Law of Attraction for Couples
Were the ones in charge of which area, what side of the spectrum, we want to be on any given subject, but the doorway into abundance is sufficiency. You start by practicing gratitude. I first started doing gratitude meditation, I would literally walk around and think of a hundred things a day, listing all of the things that I was grateful for and that would raise my vibration, it would make me feel so good and things started, almost like magic, would start being attracted into my life.
Another thing you can do is think about one thing you're grateful for and think of 20 things or reasons why and it's not lip service, it's not like I'm grateful for my husband and I'm grateful my kids, there's no energy behind that, there's no pain, you have to feel the emotion. Doesn't work unless you feel. That's why affirmations work for some people, and they don't work for other people because people are like I'm abundant, but there's no energy.
The other Universal Laws
These are seven essential laws of The Universe:
• The Law of Attraction,
• The Law of Allowing,
• The Law of Pure Potentiality ,
• The law of Oneness,
• The Law of Balance and Harmony,
• The Law of Sufficiency and Abundance,
•
These universal laws, when you apply them and learn how to work with them, they will absolutely change your life.
The Universe sends human beings countless signs and symbols over the course of their lives, and if you are able to comprehend them, you’ll be able to sense when you’re on your destined path in life—and when you’re not. Please read the list below to make sure you haven’t missed any vital info, and to ensure that you’re on the right journey.
Here are 13 signs The, Law of Attraction, is working for you https://ewao.com/2017/10/24/13-signs-the-law-of-attraction-is-working-for-you/
I love the Law of Sufficiency and Abundance. Deepak Chopra used to say we are just like a wave in the ocean, that the universe is abundant. We're not going to run out of water, we’re not going to run out of grass, sunlight. I've used this Law, let's say that you want a promotion and your friend gets it.
You're jealous and you're envious, that is a blockage because it means that you believe that is universe does not have enough for the both of you. if you say I'm happy for my friend, because this world is abundant and she's not taking my job, there's more available for me, and you're happy and you celebrate that person's success, what that’s saying is that you believe that the world is abundant.
You believe that whatever God can do for her, he is going to do for you, and that's where a lot of people don't get it. They're always envious and they're always catty and they're jealous and they can't celebrate your success. Abraham talks about this. She talks about contrast, she says go out there and look for contrast, look for things that you don't have and say that's what I want and be happy for that person. But most people don't live there. The do not understand the, the essential laws of attraction.
We’ve been talking about the, law of attraction, the playbook, personal development, quantum success, and making this a Guyana podcast, for my people.
Be aware of fear and desire. Awareness helps balance them ~ Deepak Chopra
To get a FREE copy of Christy’s book, Head over to iTunes snd leave a review for the Transform Your Mind with coach Myrna podcast, then head over to www.quantumsuccessbook.com and Kristy will send you her new book when it comes out in September for free. All you do is pay for shipping. Kristy will be back for one more episode.
Our topic will be “How to reverse the negative momentum in your career.” So remember to subscribe and you will not miss any new episodes. If you are from Guyana, I hope you enjoyed this, Law of Attraction podcast, leave me a shout out in the comments.
As a business person we should always remember that we never get a second chance to make a first impression so we must always, dress for success. How to, dress for success, we have all heard the saying don't dress for the position you have now; but the position you want to get.
Since I was a little girl I could pick out the women who had money. They would be dressed in suits or what I believed to be expensive clothing, with their hair and make up perfectly done. When they passed me, they smelled like heaven. But looking back, I realized that to, dress for success, did not mean that you had to be wealthy and have a closet full of expensive clothing. For all I knew these women that I admired, could have had only one suit in their closet or one, dress for success, frock. It is not the quantity of your wardrobe, but the quality.
In my personal experience as well as reading business books and looking at movies like 50 Shades of Grey and the Proposal with Sandra Bullock,
Here is the formula for dressing for success Men
Men if you have not seen 50 Shades of Grey, you should rent in on Netflix. Not only does it show you how to pleasure your woman; but at the beginning of the movie, it shows you what the closet of a rich successful business man looks like. Dozens of dark color suits, dozens of white shirts and dozens of ties. Steve Jobs, Mark Zuckerberg and Google have all tried to change the dress code to tea shirt and jeans; but take a look at the Senate or President Trump or Wall Street. The business suit is still the, dress of success,
I have always seen movies with the men being fitted for a suit; but I have always bought my man a suit from off the rack! Apparently that is bad!
A carefully fitted suit is worth it's weight in gold.
Even if it is off the rack it shouldn't fit like a sack!
Get it altered to fit. It does not matter how much the suit cost; but it must fit!
That is the secret to looking successful. That is the way to, dress for success,
The consensus is that a, business suit, should be single breasted and either dark blue or dark grey.
Heading back to Christian Grey in, 50 shades of Grey. Notice that all his shirts were white. I have never seen President Barack Obama, in nothing other than a white shirt. Your white shirt should be one hundred percent cotton with button down collars and always long sleeves. Short sleeves are out! Complete the look with a pair of black loafers, well shined and with a new looking heel. If your heal wears down to one side, get it replaced at the shoe maker.
Here is the formula for dressing for success Women
As from my intro I have been trying to copy Sandra Bullock's look in “The Proposal” for some time now. That is my, dress for success, look. If you haven't seen the movie, she rocked the black pencil skirt with a white shirt and pumps with elegant heels.
Find a look that flatters your figure. As women we come in all sizes. I don't have time to get into the best look if you are busty, hippy or made to wear clothes like a super model. The formula to, dressing for success women, is to invest in a few classic, simple suits in dark colors.
The same as the men, grey or blue. I still have the suit jacket I purchased from my first big pay check as a salesperson, 20 years ago. It was a grey wool blend double breasted skirt suit. I paid $700 for it from my $30,000 pay check. I felt successful so I went out and started, dressing for success,
Nice simple fitted dresses also work wonders, especially if paired with a blazer and some fashionable jewelry. The great thing is that you can loose the blazer for the after work parties and still be, dressed for success,.
As women we like to flaunt our sexually, but avoid wearing bright colors, tight pants, mini skirts, plunging necklines or blue jeans. It may get you in the door short term; but it be paid for with long term loss, because men will hit on you, since they will feel that is what you are selling. Then a whole can of worms is opened up that doesn't end well.
Dressing for success shoes,
Shoes. I love the look of the thin healed pumps. It makes any foot look elegant. Not everyone can wear those including me. I just purchased a pair from the Ivanka Trump line. Don't judge me they were on sale! And of course we have the Sex in the city reruns with the iconic Carrie Bradshaw for inspiration on how to, dress for success, with shoes.
So there you have it. Some ideas how to look the part before you get the part. As you lean your ladder against the wall of success, my wish for you in 2019 is that you get to the top of the ladder or at least make progress up the rungs.
Fear, can keep you on the sidelines. Sometimes you have to tell, fear, you are not welcome here and just, jump in. Sometimes it is a life-or-death situation like drowning, other times it is jumping in that job you are not sure of, jumping in the marriage even though you have doubts, jumping into taking that night class even though you don’t know how you will juggle child care and a full-time job.
First Corinthians 2:9 says, “However, as it is written:‘What no eye has seen, what no ear has heard, and what no human mind has conceived’ — the things God has prepared for those who love him.” But in order to experience what He has prepared for us, we have to, jump in.
When I was a young mother, my greatest, fear, was what would I do if my kids were drowning. Would I, jump in, to save them even though I didn’t know how to swim?
I quieted that, fear, by taking a swimming class at the YWCA and also making sure that my children learned to swim. Both my children are strong swimmers and can swim in the ocean. My skills are limited to the pool.
But I recently heard a story that made my blood run cold. At a church picnic by the river a young boy accidentally stepped into the deep end and went under water. Six other boys, jumped in, to save him. All six of them drowned; they never came back up. All six of them had parents watching who never, jumped in, to save them, because they didn’t know how to swim. So, I am asking you this question. If you don’t how to swim would you, jump in, to save your child?
So many times, we are faced with this decision in life should I, jump in, and trust God to take my hand and bring me out? Or do I let, fear, keep me on the side lines? Sometimes it is a life-or-death situation like drowning, other times it is jumping in that job you are not sure of, jumping in, the marriage even though you have doubts, jumping into taking that night class even though you don’t know how you will juggle child care and a full-time job.
How many women did not accept that marriage proposal in their 20s because you were afraid to, jump in, and today you are alone because you never got another proposal? If you had, jumped in, God may have taken your hand and allowed you to navigate the rough waters. My husband proposed to me after 11 months and I decided to, jump in, and quiet the negative thoughts that told me you should date for 2 years before getting married because people show their true colors after 2 years. This month is out 16-year wedding anniversary. God has held my hand through the rough times.
Moses, Jeremiah and Gideon jumped in the deep end of God’s will, and God did amazing works through each of them.
Jump in and tell the Devil to get behind you
Look the Devil in the eye and tell him get behind me Satan, not today. You are not keeping me on the sidelines rooted in fear. I am jumping in.
Allowing the, fear, of “what if” to mess with our mind and rule our heart will smother your confidence and courage with an avalanche of doubt.
Fear, has no choice but to leave the premises when we stand on God’s promises and say, “You are not welcome here.” I am, jumping in, and trusting God.
Tell the Devil “You can’t have my peace; you can’t have my family”
If you are fearful, jump in.
If you get in the water this is where healing takes place. If you get in the water God will show up.
You have to learn how to hold on to something that is broken until you get to the next level.
Stay afloat by just kicking your feet. Refuse to go down, just keep kicking.
Refuse to do the backstroke. You are never going back to feeling like that. You are never going back to loneliness. Don’t be afraid of the water. God has not given you a, spirit of fear.
