The game of life, you have all heard of the expression “When life gives you lemons, make, lemonade.” It is a proverbial phrase that is used to encourage people to stay, optimistic, and to keep fighting in the face of, adversity, or misfortune. Lemon suggests sourness and difficulty in life; making, lemonade, with lemons that is being handed out to you turns the whole sour episode into something sweet, positive, and desirable. In, the game of life, you have to play with the cards you are dealt.
When the British colonized India they built a golf course in Calcutta, and they had a problem with the, monkeys. The, monkeys, would pick up the balls the golfers hit and put it somewhere else.
They tried to solve the problem by building a fence around the course, but of course, monkeys, climb; so that didn’t work.
Then they tried to lure the, monkeys, away with bananas; but only some were lured away, and others weren’t.
Plus, all the, monkeys, for miles around would show up to feed on their favorite food, so that didn’t work either.
Finally, they accepted defeat and changed the rules of the game. The new rules had the golfers play the ball from wherever the, monkeys, dropped it.
This is a great story to illustrate, the game of life. We always have to play the ball where life drops it. We would all love to be able to place the ball where we think it should be, but we can't.
This is a strange story to depict the mantra “if life gives you lemons make lemonade.” We don’t always get sugar and spice and everything that is nice, most of the time things don’t work out the way we planned and that is, the game of life.
turn a negative experience into something positive
make something sweet out of something bitter
embrace life in whatever form it comes
look on the bright side of life, every cloud has a silver lining!
My favorite show is Private Practice and Addison made a statement on the show that with this saying:
“We make plans but God make other plans, he has the last word”
Your desire to have a baby could be so strong that you pray every day, you dream of your baby every day; you think of your life with your baby every day; but it’s been 5 years and you are not pregnant. The doctors say you are infertile. Time to play the ball where the monkey dropped it and either adopt a child, foster a child, look for a surrogate mother or start fertility treatments.
Another example is to practice, the law of detachment. This law states that you should only be attached to your end goal not the journey. If your goal is to retire and travel the world that is your destination. The journey could take you around that golf course several times back and forth, sometimes you would be stuck in the sand box, sometimes you will hit the ball in the lake, but if you keep playing you will eventually get to the 18th hole.
Forrest Gump said it best, life is like a box of chocolates you never know what you are going to get so, if life gives you lemons make lemonade.
Although I was devastated when I was fired from my job, I used the time to go back to college and get my degree. I now have a better job! This is an example of, the game of life, making, lemonade, out of lemons.
My grandfather lost his job due to the coronavirus, but he decided to keep busy and start his own business. He says, “if life gives you lemons, make lemonade.”
Another anecdote for, the game of life, when one door shuts, another one opens; so become optimistic.
Making, lemonade, out of the lemons in life, my hope is that you look at this moment in time as a learning lesson in, the game of life, and try to find the sweetness of the moment.
Juice and strain the lemons. There a couple of tricks for getting the most juice out of your lemons (rolling them, slicing them lengthwise, roasting them), but my new favorite “juicing hack” is to actually crush the whole lemons using my stand mixer. Seriously! Here’s how you do it: Quarter the lemons and put them in the bowl of your stand mixer with the paddle attachment. Use low speed to squeeze the lemons, then strain the juice directly into a measuring cup.
Use the lemon juice to dissolve the sugar. Many modern, lemonade, recipes call for making a simple syrup — sugar and water boiled together — for sweetening summer, lemonade, but if you stir the sugar directly into the lemon juice you can skip the simple syrup and get to, lemonade, faster — no heat required.
Add cold water to taste. Since the lemon juice dissolves the sugar, we can go straight from lemon juice to cold water and ice and serve the, lemonade, straight away.
We are all in the, pursuit of happiness. Ask anyone what they want most out of life and they will tell you I want to be happy. But we have to choose to be happy. Our, happiness, cannot depend on external circumstances whether they be good or bad because everything is temporary.
If You lose your home or your job, that event takes your, happiness, or, wellbeing, with them. You go into depression because the winds of the storm are making the waves of your seas rough; but do you know the ocean is 2 miles deep? There could be hurricane force winds on the top of the ocean, but there is no movement on the ocean floor. It remains calm and unaffected.
That is how we can, choose to be happy, regardless of the hurricane force winds, that is creating chaos in our lives, we can choose to be in the, pursuit of happiness.
You have to, transform your mind, from, jealousy, anger, and depression because we feel badly after we express those feelings.
On the flip side:
We feel good when we give to the poor.
We feel good when we help others who are less fortunate.
We feel good when we, choose to be happy, regardless of how we feel.
Synchronicity, is the simultaneous occurrence of events which appear significantly related, but have no discernible causal connection.
Spirituals guru’s like Deepak Chopra says, synchronicity, operates in the spirit realm. Our, vibration, and energy attract people and things to us to help us to carry out our purpose and sometimes to guide us in another direction.
Everything in our physical world is made up of, vibration of energy, including the walls in your house, your bed and our thoughts.
Our thoughts are the most powerful, vibration of energy.
Any thought that is repeated over and over in your conscious mind will make an, imprint, into the, subconscious mind.
Once this, imprint, takes place, it becomes a, vibrating force, and attracts to you the people, places and things, circumstances, events, etc. that matches the images you have within. You have the real power to influence and direct the things that happen to you with your thoughts.
Back in 2004 my ex-husband and I were going through a rocky marriage. I was constantly thinking of ending the marriage, but I kept it going because he was sponsoring me to become a permanent resident in the United States. During the application process, I left the country to go to Toronto for my brother’s wedding and when I tried to return to the USA, I was denied entry because I did not apply for a travel pass.
I spent a very painful week in Canada and my husband did not care if I ever came back. So, my thoughts were constantly on “I can’t go through with this. I can’t stay married to this man.”
I was able to get back into the United States (if you want to hear the story pick up a copy of my book)
My very first day back to work I met my current husband. I took the train to and from work and he was the officer working the train to verify ticket purchase. I walked on the train and he was standing at the door doing a ticket check. Our eyes met and sparks flew. Two weeks later my husband and I had a fight on Father’s Day, and we called it quits. Nothing about this chain of events was a, coincidence, this was, synchronicity. My permanent residence application was denied with my ex-husband and my current husband sponsored me and my children.
“The most strongly endorsed explanations for coincidences are God and fate” God promises that everything will work out for your good.
Synchronicity vs Coincidence
Coincidence vs synchronicity, are related, but distinct terms. The term coincidence, describes a seemingly related series of events that occur without apparent cause. The term, synchronicity, requires that the individual ascribe deeper meaning to the, coincidence; like the story of how I met my husband.
Pay attention to where coincidence is leading you.
Synchronicity, is energy when you change your, vibration of energy, you start attracting more of what you are feeling. This is the, Law of Attraction.
One practice to clean up your, vibration, and start attracting, synchronicity, into your life is with, imprinting.
Imprinting, is like learning your times tables
It has been, imprinted, into our, consciousness. We never forget.
Visualization with imprinting
I bet if I asked you what is 7*7 you don’t have to think before responding 49. I learned that 55 years ago!
The, good girl, label is not about beingmorally good, the problem with being a, good girl, is thatat the end of the day, it doesn't work.It doesn't work for anyone. This isn't an anti-moralityconversation; it's correcting our idea ofwhat’s good and what’sright.
Sitting in the guest chair today on the Transform Your Mind Podcast, isKasiaUrbaniak. Kasia is the author of “Unbound:A woman's Guide to Power”. Today, we are going to be talkingabout “How to ditch the, good girl label”.
Bio
Since founding The Academy in 2013, Kasia has taught over 4000 women to radically increase their power, agency and influence. Using practical tools, Academy graduates transform their lives by breaking the yoke of ‘Good Girl’ conditioning. They step boldly into leadership roles within their relationships, families, workplaces, and wider communities.
They become adept in the art of verbal self-defense against bulldozing, bullying, and gaslighting. They make bold, life-changing asks of the people around them in a way that feels good to the person being asked. They can hear “no” without getting flustered or giving up, and use resistance as a way to build intimacy and partnership.
Introduction
Myrna: Kasia, let's start off by asking youwhat was your journey into founding the Academy, teaching womenthefoundations of power and influence? I read part of your bio that you were once a, dominatrix, I would love to hear about that.
Kasia: I found myself with an unusual set oftraining. I exploredvarious spiritual traditions and wanted to transcend this world.The one that spoke to me because it seemed the most practical andmagical was, Taoism.
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I was a Dominatrix while pursuing monastic education
Now, while I waspursuing my trainingand pursuing monastic education, the ironic part was there was no way for me as a girl growing up in New York Cityto be able to afford such things withoutgetting a job that would pay me a lot ofmoney in short bursts. So, I was workingas a professional, dominatrix, in dungeons in New York City and then flying off tomeet with teachers to convincethem to teach me all the way up to mountaintops in China.
Thislasted for thegreater part of a decade. This straddling, absolutely insane split personality education, where I felt guilty about one when I was doing theother. What started happeningwas these extremes ended upmergingwhen I started diagnosingpeople's bodies as a, Taoist, trainee.I started going into deeper states ofmeditation and noticed that my training as a, dominatrix, allows me to notice the power dynamics , I startedseeing similarities in my work as a,dominatrix.
I was paying attentionto human beingsand started to understand powerdynamics the way you study martial arts. I began to teach this power to women, I do not teach as a, dominatrix, and I do not teach as anun.
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Afterthis wildlife of extremes, of desiringabsolute purity and devotion while goinginto these wildly psychologically strange, weird and interesting placeswith other humans, I started noticing that I was changing. I saw all my friends around me and allthe people in my life (the womenespecially), living in a world ofassumptions and superstitions.
Women are communicating with their bodies all the time
I started noticing that women didn't realize that they are physically broadcasting and communicating all the time. That their power magnetic. You could say more submissive,but it's not submissive at all.
The, good girl, label is not about beingmorally good, the problem with being a, good girl, is thatat the end of the day, it doesn't work.It doesn't work for anyone. This isn't an anti-moralityconversation; it's correcting our idea ofwhat’s good and what’sright.
Myrna: You had a lot of nuggets andyou're very right. When your publicist approached meand she started off with the, dominatrix, thing, I pushed back right away until I read the full bio. I understoodwhat you were trying to say.You're giving women the power of choice. Women canstill be submissive and powerful, right?
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Also, I know that being a people-pleaser and being a,good girl, doesn't get you anywhere, people walk all over you. We've got asaying in my country “ifyou lay down like a doormat, people are going to walk all over you”.So, I understand you help women break the yolk of the,good girl, conditioning. So, tell us why specificallythe label of a, bad girl, is beneficialbecause I’m interested in hearing your spin.
Kasia: Good girl, conditioning has a very longhistory and it comes fromtheagreementthat we make not as spiritual and personal agreement, but an economicagreement of marriage. We have a deal and there's nothingwrong with even holding that deal today,but the deal is “I willlet you lead, but you provide forme”. So, up until very recently, a woman who had ambition, opinion, a vision and desirescouldn't express it as an individual. The best she could do and the best way shecould fulfill her ambitions was to marry. The behaviors around the, good girl,are the behaviors we're calling, good girl, conditioning.
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Such behaviors are basically thebehaviors of how to be marriageable, how to attract and keep agood man, how toqualifyto marry the most economically promising man – given that you can't have a job, you can't get educated, you can't read, and you're not allowed toleave the house (in some countries).
So, women learn “I don’t want to be aburden”.
How to be resourceful because ifyou're the economic provider, then I haveto be able tomakebig things out of little things (beresourceful),
Be moderate in temperament,
Not be tooattractiveso as to notget competition, but not to benoticeably unattractive, not to stand outin this way or that way,
Women are not to have too much sexual desire, in fact notto have too much desire at all.
Actually, it's not just being accommodating, harmonious and warm, but also not havinga voice essentially, they're from women who are like I‘mnot a, good girl,I don't need anyone, I‘m fine.
The modern day, people-pleaser, is an outgrowth of the, good girl. Why we call her an outgrowth like asister of the, good girl, but she's still thesame woman because even though shebelieves that she can haveher desires, she has to go for what she wants by herself. She never asks anybody for help, she neverburdens anybody, she does it all. She isthe feminine and the masculine.She is the alpha female.
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Most of the women who come to my schoolare like this because, they're verysuccessful. They have families, they havecareersand they have everything they want and they are exhaustedand are furious;they have to do it all.
Myrna: it's like the superwoman syndrome.
Good Girls learn to say No
Kasia: The problem is that men hold all the cards. Women don't have the same experience asmen because, men don't do it all the same way. When they are in positionsofleadership or have a career, they havesupport that the women in their sameplace do not have.
The issue with, good girl,conditioningis – you can say “I‘m an, independent woman, I push back and I stand up for myself. I have learnt how to say No. You can identify with someone whodoesn't have, good girl conditioning, butthe truth is the conditioning comes outso quicklythat we barely catch it.
We're programmed and it's in our subconscious and that is why I founded the Academy with my partnerReuben.
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Myrna: Why do you say specifically that the, bad girl, label isgood? How do you transform them from being a,good girl, to a, bad girl? What does,bad girl, really mean?
Kasia: Okay. We got three things, bad girl,is the first. The first of the threeand the other two are really importantelements ofthe, bad girl.So, the first is a really simple exercise and I want to set up the context ofthis exercise. Bad girls learn to ask for what they want.
I have the women that I work with this exercise which ends up beingmore difficult than it sounds. The intention is to write all the things you feel make you a, bad girl, onto paper. What we want to dois start opening Pandora’s Box in thesafest way possible.
We start with a sentence completion, its part of a sentence you fill in the blank and you repeat it, You write “if I were a, badgirl. I would do ,,,,,,,,,,,”
We use, bad girl, specificallybecause it brings you back to thatyounger age where you start learning what you'resupposed to like, not like, what you're supposed to think etc.
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The purpose ofwriting all these terrible things is that, the things we didn't even knowwe put in the, bad girl, closet start comingout. When I explain part two and three, it's going to become even more apparenthow this works so you start opening the,bad girl, closet.
Myrna: I‘m sure a lot of itis around sex and what, badgirls, do and what, good girls, do not do.
Kasia: Some have ideas and desires of sexual liberation and some have ideas of standing up for themselves. Some feel that anger is bad, that, good girls, do not get angry. Good girls, is part of the submissive conditioning or why,good girls, don’t get angry.
The, good girl conditioning, doesn’t even let you become awarethat your man isdisrespecting you when he calls you names.Maybe he just treats you like amaid and then one day youwake up and start thinking; this is disrespect.
When you tell The Bulldozer, explicitly or implicitly, to back off, they come on even stronger. When you tell The Bulldozer your needs, they will do exactly the opposite. That's why they're called The Bulldozer. Because they trample all over your boundaries.
How good girls get respect
Kasia: If you want respect, you never ever say I want youto respect me! That's communicating there's something wrong with you.
The moment you arevoicing a complaint, you arecreating an atmosphere of defense. We don't want to be in defense mode, we obviously want to be in offense, mode.
Myrna: So, how does someone do it, how do we state ourdesires in offensive mode?
Kasia: Themoment you ask them to do somethingspecific, the power dynamichas changed. The issue with women is thattheir energy is too inward:
The moment you start directing theiractions, making those requests thatwould resonate with you as respect, you are in the dominant position. The moment you start making them in control of yourhappinessand telling them they're doing a bad job, you are in defense mode.
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Myrna: I heard thisa lot that men say, “Oh, she'stoo, high maintenance”, but you're also saying there's no such thing as a, lowmaintenance, woman just women who arenot bold enough to ask for what they want.
Kasia: So, high maintenance, is a fad. No woman is, lowmaintenance, but when men complain aboutwomen being, high maintenance, whatthey're actually saying is not you are too much work. What they'resaying is I never got the instruction manual on how to treat you as a woman.
Men just got used to ignoring and toleratingthe complaints of women, because they neverreally understood what makesthem happy. Women weren't asking for thethings that would actually light them up, give them orgasms, make themfeel supported and empowered. What men got was a bunch of vague things.
You find a manwho's getting specific instructions forthe first time; he's like a little boy ina candy storelike – yes, what can I do next?He feelscompetent and takes care of his women like he takes care of his car!
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Kasia: The book is a step-by-step trainingmanual. It definitely talks about how to ask and how to get off the spotwhen you're being bullied and bulldozed. There's a lot of how-to stuff therealso. I teach women howto create allies out of all the men in their lives. The book is also a journeythroughhow toget all of the support that you needfrom the people in your lifeto make your actual dreams anddesires come true.
Not the ones that youthink are attainable and not the onesthat you think are socially acceptable. A huge part of the book is breaking the, goodgirl conditioning.
Myrna: How can those listening and watching in TV connect with you? How can they get a copy of yourbook and get yourget information about yourAcademy?
Kasia: The easiest way to find out more isto go to the website www.weteachpower.com.
We have an announcement on the site of all our classes. Also, there are tons of free resourcesand videos and things that theinterested listeners, viewers and readers canengage with. The book is available everywherebooks are sold. Penguin Randomhouse published itand there's my Ted talk that I delivered to 10,000people live as well.
Myrna: Thank you forbeing so in-depth about understandingthe mindset of women andthe mindset of the power. What is your social media handle?
Kasia: @realkasiaUrbaniak on Instagram.
Conclusion
Please remember to subscribe to the podcast on iTunes, we would love for you to rate and post a review so that we can getthese fantastic guests out towider audience.
Thanks for tuningin and until next time, blessings.
This is life coach Myrna Young and today I want to teach on the topic “Loving Your Enemy”.
In the King James Version of the Bible: Jesus Christ, says “But I say unto you, love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you.”
He goes further to say “do not resist an evil person. If anyone slaps you on the right cheek, turn to them the other cheek also”
Most humans in the natural cannot live by the doctrine to, love your enemies, and neither could I, until I, transformed my mindset. You see the reason, Jesus Christ, taught us to love our, enemies, is that the power of love, transforms.
For the last 9 months I have been in a battle with my, enemy. A racist neighbor who is the Vice President on my HOA. For months I allowed her to steal my peace. I know that evil intentions against another is a, karmic debt, so I battled against this, enemy, with my, spiritual warfare prayers.
Spiritual Warfare Prayer
Father God as we enter in spiritual warfare please cover us in your armor the breastplate of righteousness, faith, and the power of your word.
Let no weapon formed formed against me penetrate our heart and that all weapons formed against me and my family be returned to the sender void.
Anoint me of God that I will be strong in the word and I will be able to stand against the enemy.
Bless my heart and my tongue with the words of warfare in Jesus name.
I decree and declare that the anointing of Elisha will be upon me. That the God of Elisha and Joshua answer me by fire, that the sun and the moon won't recognize me in this time of warfare. That the works of the enemy would not succeed and all the darts of wickedness will be sent back to the sender in the powerful name of, Jesus Christ, my Lord and Savior.
Father bless me with divine strength that you gave to Jacob that I will go out prepared and that I would know your will. That my enemies will be unseated by fire. Amen
Don't give back the Hate your enemy gives you
I gave her back the same, hate, she gave me and prayed for her demise until one day I was listening to the book “The seat of the soul” by Gary Zukav and was convicted when he said that when we respond to hate with hate we enlarge the energy and become the same as the person who hates us.
We should instead, love our enemies, because light always erases darkness. So I started meditating and sending my, enemy, light and understanding, because I knew, hate, is a learned behavior and she is operating from lack of knowledge.
Then a few weeks ago I was watching the Netflix movie “The Best of Enemies” the movie was about a white ,clansman, and a, black activist. The, clansman, was the president of the, Ku Klux Klan, and he believed that the white race was superior and that black people had no rights. The, black activist, was fighting for fair housing for blacks. Then someone burnt down the black school, (this was during the segregation age) so the fight changed to school integration. The white, clansman, and the, black activist, were opposing leaders on the integration issue.
Love Your Enemy and Send Them Light
The white, clansman, had a mentality ill son who was in an institution and because we teach our kids our, hate, the boy became unhinged when they placed a black boy to share his room. The boy would scream all day saying the black boy was a monster. The white, clansman, asked the institution to remove the black boy, but they told him if he wanted the boy removed he had to pay for a private room. The, clansman, was poor, he could not afford the $75 extra per week for a private room.
The, black activist, heard the story and felt sorry for the son of the, clansman, and used her influence to have him transferred to a private room at no cost to the, clansman. This act of kindness and love started to change the, clansman, heart against black people. Then his white friend told him that other than his wife, the black man who was his store manager is the only one he trusts in this world, because this black man served with him in Vietnam and saved his life.
That completed the, transformation. His heart changed. The power of love and light moved in, and the darkness and hate moved out.
Dr Martin Luther King Jr on Loving our Enemies
How do you go about loving your, enemies? Dr Martin Luther King Jr says, I think the first thing is this: In order to, love your enemies, you must begin by analyzing self. And I’m sure that seems strange to you, that I start out telling you this morning that you, love your enemies, by beginning with a look at self. It seems to me that that is the first and foremost way to come to an adequate discovery to the how of this situation.
Now, I’m aware of the fact that some people will not like you, not because of something you have done to them, but they just won’t like you. I’m quite aware of that.
Some people aren’t going to like You
Some people aren’t going to like the way you talk.
Most people aren’t going to like you because you can do your job better than they can do theirs.
People aren’t going to like you because other people like you, and because you’re popular, and because you’re well-liked, they aren’t going to like you.
Some aren’t going to like you because your hair is a little shorter than theirs or your hair is a little longer than theirs.
Some of them won't like you because your skin is a little brighter than theirs; and others aren’t going to like you because your skin is a little darker than theirs.
Some are going to dislike you, not because of something that you’ve done to them, but because of various jealous reactions and other reactions that are so prevalent in human nature.
Who is Your Enemy
But after looking at these things and admitting these things, we must face the fact that an, enemy, might dislike us because of something that we’ve done in the past. Some personality attribute that we possess, something that we’ve done in the past and we’ve forgotten about it; but it was that something that aroused the, hate response, within the individual. That is why I say, begin with yourself. There might be something within you that arouses the tragic, hate response, in the other individual.
And this is what Jesus means when he said: “How is it that you can see the mote in your brother’s eye and not see the beam in your own eye?” Or to put it in Moffatt’s translation: “How is it that you see the splinter in your brother’s eye and fail to see the plank in your own eye?” And this is one of the tragedies of human nature. So we begin to love our enemies and love those persons that hate us whether in collective life or individual life by looking at ourselves.
A second thing that an individual must do in seeking to, love his enemy, is to discover the element of good in his enemy. Every time you begin to, hate, that person and think of hating that person, realize that there is some good there. Look at those good points which should over-balance the bad points.
Can we love our enemy?
So, the question is can we, love our enemies? I say we can. There is a saying that unforgiveness is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die. I say, hate, is the same way.
Joel Osteen teaches that when we stamp things negative, we allow them to steal our joy and happiness. I stamp, hate, from my, enemy, as positive, because I believe that God will turn whatever my, enemy, meant to harm me for my good. His word says
“'For I know the plans I have for you, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.
When you replace, fear, with, faith, it prevents your, subconscious mind, from going into reflex mode and bringing what you, fear, into your experience.
The Bible teaches that, faith, without works is dead. That means as we say in my birth country of Guyana
Put your money where your mouth is.
Eg. If you, have faith, that God is going bring you the desires of your heart and you desire to have a child; then you don’t do like Sarah and have your husband sleep with Hagar (your maid) so you can have a child. No you have, courage, to stay the course and in God’s time you will have a child.
You pick out baby names,
Shop for your nursery,
You buy pregnancy clothes,
And you live in expectancy, hoping every month that your period does not show up!
Listen to the full episode here:
Faith means getting up after you fall down
If you experience some setbacks like several miscarriages, you have, courage, and believe in Gods promise, that everything works out for your good. You believe that Gods intentional!
The, subconscious mind, can’t tell fact from fiction, it brings you whatever you think about consistently.
Jesus says by their fruits we shall know them.
If you live with, courage, we shall know you by your fruits because, faith, is the language to God and he always delivers.
Man was created in Gods image with the power to rule the world. Have faith, that you have the power to manifest your heart’s desire and believe that whatever you hold on your head, you will hold in your hand.
Every living thing has confidence in something or somebody. You, have faith, that if you deposit your money in the bank, it will be there when you go to withdraw it. You, have faith, that if you plant a mango tree, it will bear mangoes and not oranges.
Similarly, we must, have faith, that whatever we ask God in prayer he will answer.
It is your habitual tendency of thought that reappears in your body and recreates the conditions in your life.
You become what you think about most of the time.
https://youtu.be/pcQz3Y-Zl5A
Speak faith Not fear
The words you use are the channels in which the creative energy takes shape.
This energy takes the shape from the instrument from which it passes. Water flowing from a crooked cup, flows crooked. Water must take the shape of the pipe from which it flows.
You can't think one thing and produce another, this is as impossible as an electric fan being used for lighting purposes.
As a man thinketh so is he.
There is an intelligence in all nature. Faith, without works is dead but with it, sets you free.
Say Goodbye to, Fear, cultivating, courage, have faith, and if you are afraid, Do it afraid.
When you, fear, you have a pessimistic view of life. Worrying about the future is futile, we have no control about the future so if you are going to imagine the worst, why not shift it and use your imagination to create the life you want.
We are able to create whatever we think about most of the time. We become what we think about.
Think about this story. A young lady was worrying about losing her job. She feared losing her home, becoming homeless and worked herself into a frenzy by looking down into the abyss of, fear. But if she used her imagination to dream about getting a promotion instead of losing her job. Dreaming about buying a new home allows her to look up.
Your, unconscious mind, is carrying out behaviors that sabotage your, conscious mind, 24 hours per day. In fact studies show that our, subconscious, mind, is running our lives 95% of the time. If you don't, reprogram your subconscious mind, you will continue to run the same, subconscious programs, like a a tape recorder. We have to erase the tape and rewrite the tape for it to play new programs. Listen to the interview to learn how to, reprogram your unconscious mind.
Listen to the full interview here:
Introduction, Unconscious mind
Whenever you are on autopilot, you are running, unconscious mind. Have you ever gotten in your car and driven to your destination and you don’t recall how you got there. That is your, unconscious mind, driving you to your destination.
Autopilot is just one of your, subconscious programs, that has to do with your beliefs.
These, subconscious programs, were downloaded to you before your 7th birthday are the programs your, unconscious mind, play until you die; unless you, reprogram your subconscious mind.
Even if you become aware of your, subconscious programs, you still continue the behaviors because the, unconscious mind, will keep playing the same, subconscious programs. Think about your vinyl record. Unless you scratch the record, it will play the same song forever!
When I was growing up my activity of choice was reading Harlequin romances. I was brainwashed into believing that love looked and acted in a certain way. For example, all the leading men in my Harlequin romance novels, were rugged, tall, dark and good looking. All the leading ladies were independent and did not want a man's help; so the man and the woman ended up feuding and hating each other until they realized that all, this attention they are placing on each other fighting, were actually the flip side of love!
These lovers, leading men and ladies were never a good match. Chemistry and raw physical attraction lead the way. Thirty years later, I was still playing that, subconscious program, It wasn’t until I met my husband that I started looking on the inside of a man, and not what he presented on the outside that I was able to, reprogram my unconscious mind,
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I was listening to a sermon by, Joel Osteen, a few months back and he was telling the story of, subconscious programs, with his sister. Joel said his sister was praying and asking God for a husband and God sent her a wonderful man; but she rejected him because he had red hair. He did not fit her, subconscious programs, for a mate. It took her years to reprogram her mindset and love this man.
Did you grow up in a home where your dad worked and your mom stayed home and watched the kids? You never saw your dad because he was always working and your family just had enough? That is your model of a family and today you are probably still running this, subconscious programs,
What is your, Unconscious Mind, that needs to be rewritten?
I was a foster mom for years. I see the, unconscious mind, in foster and adopted kids all the time. Especially since most of them came into foster care system before their 7th birthday. They developed programs on, abandonment, attachment disorders, survival, most of them hoard food because their, unconscious mind, and lack and survival.
Here are 5, subconscious programs, Teenagers are running today
Make generalizations (no one loves me, I’m always going to be a failure, I’ll never get a job or pass this test)
Make choices and judgment based on past experiences.
3. Settle in life, don’t apply for jobs or get involved in extra curricular activities.
4. Reviews information and draws conclusions.
If someone breaks their heart, they learn to not trust people – to avoid being hurt again. If living in poverty, feel like will never get enough money to make it out of poverty. If get in a fight, feel they always need to protect them self
5. Accepts information literally and personally (take a lot of things said to heart, but not as constructive criticism)
A mental picture is worth a thousand words. Your, unconscious mind, will bring to pass any picture held in the mind and backed by faith.
This is the space I am spending a lot of time in, at the moment. I am working on visualizing my goals and desires and speaking, affirmations. I am having a hard time of it, because I am not a visual person. But this is the first step in controlling the, unconscious mind, Visualizing what you want. Let the, unconscious mind, find the way, you only have to give it the destination.
For example if you want to be married by the age of 30 and have 3 kids. That is the mental picture you give your, unconscious mind, The universe will find the man and arrange the kids! Just say, affirmations, every day to reprogram your, unconscious mind.
Daily Affirmations, like:
I will get married to the man of my dreams by age 30
The Universe will deliver to me the man of my dreams by the time I am 30
I will get married by age 30 and have 3 kids by age 35
Remember to give your, unconscious mind, only instructions that would elevate and heal. It is the secret to your success. Your, unconscious mind, cannot take a joke. Don’t say things like with my luck the man that shows up would be bowed legged with buck teeth! Because guess what, hold that image in your mind for any length of time and that is what you will get, a bow legged man with buck teeth. Trust me on this.
About 10 years ago I read, Deepak Chopra’s, book called “Grow Younger, Live Longer” In this book Deepak taught us to say, affirmations, every day. It went like this.
Daily Affirmations for aging younger
Every day, in every way, I am getting younger and younger,
my biological clock is set at a healthy 30 years of age,
I look and feel a healthy 30 years of age.
Every day I am renewing my mind and body by eating healthy foods,
I take nutritional supplements wisely, etc.
I don’t remember all of it. I was saying these, affirmations, around my 40th birthday. So over 20 years ago. I still remember those, affirmations, because I said them every day for several months.
This year on my 60th birthday, I posted a picture on Facebook and this girl commented. She said “It is like you stopped aging at 30 years old. You just said F**K it! I am not getting any older! I do look 20 years younger than my chronological age and that’s because I rewrote my, subconscious programs,!
How to Rewrite Your Subconscious Mind
In my, conscious mind, I was always planning out my future and all things I wanted it to entail. I told myself, you will never be broke, you’re a go getter and you will always meet your basic necessities because of that. This mindset, relays into my life because it reminds me that failure is never an option and all things are possible because I know it is.
Many times, I feel that I have programmed my, unconscious mind, for the success. I heal myself faster from injuries. For example, one time my eye was swollen, and I had a workshop coming up in 2 days. I said to my, subconscious mind, don’t sweat it, you are going to get a warm rag and sleep with it on your eye, then you will use antibiotics and by the day of your workshop it will be gone.
Sure enough, the eye was not swollen anymore and I was able to facilitate my workshop with two functional eyes. Furthermore, despite all the adversity I have experienced in my life, I was always sure that I would finish University and get my degree. I programmed my, unconscious mind, to prepare for the test.
Remember the, unconscious mind, is carrying out behaviors that sabotage the, conscious mind.
Our, subconscious programs, doesn't stop at age 7; but continues for the rest of our lives.
Take risks to get past, subconscious programs, Your, unconscious mind, always wants to play it safe.
Ask questions like, What else is possible that I have not considered?
Say things like, how cool is it that I have all this extra money.
4. What am I going to do with all this extra cash?
5. How can I make this a reality?
6. What if I become a successful as a TV talk show host? What would that look like? See yourself in this role. This one is for me!!
Conclusion reprogram your unconscious mind
This strategy is called, auto inquisition. Thomas Edison practiced, auto inquisition. He would sit in a chair and ask his, unconscious mind, questions about an invention. You can do the same.
Give yourself permission to be successful, believe that you deserve good things to happen
Don’t allow other peoples fears to make you doubt yourself.
Surround yourself with positive reinforcement and allies.
Speak your success as present fact not a future plan. Instead of saying I am figuring out how to do that now, say I am strategist. What do I need to make that happen right now.
Start asking for what you want and keep track of all the things that have happened (gratitude journal)
Create a vision space, so you can imagine what it is you want to happen in your life.
Additional Resources Unconscious mind
“Keeping a healthy mind is important to have a balanced life. Mental health training can help you enhance self-awareness providing tips and knowledge about this topic”.
Out of the Snares, a story of hope and encouragement is a book written to encourage women of color who were born in lack. It showcases my, personal growth, journey and how I got, out of the snares, of poverty and, child abuse.
This is my interview on the Books of the Month show on www.ptwwntv.com
Listen to the interview:
Introduction to Out Of the Snares
Myrna – I am a, life coach, I host a show on the preach the word television network called Transform Your Mind to Transform Your Life, one of the reasons that I wrote the book, Out of the Snares, is because I believe and I wanted to encourage women that it is not where we come from, but where we end up that’s important.
It's also the only way that we can go through that transition like from a caterpillar to a butterfly is if we allow the things that happen to us in life help us with, personal growth. We should use challenges to transform ourselves and for our, personal development.
So, the book, Out of the Snares, is basically a story of my life. I wrote it from a, life coaching, perspective with 10 principles of, life experiences, that happened to me and what I learned from those, life experiences.
I’m a, life coach, but I do most of my coaching on my show Transform Your Mind. It is a radio, podcast and a television show.
Dr O.C Pringle: You're doing it all sister Young, you're doing it all right and so of course your inspiration would be your, life's experience, and, child abuse. let's talk about that.
Out of the Snares of Child Sexual Abuse
Myrna: I was, sexually abused, as a child in Guyana by a family friend. He was technically my Godfather, but being from a third world country, a very poor country and he was very rich.
We would call him a, pedophile, he showered me with a lot of attention, and bought me a lot of gifts and then took advantage of that.
I didn't realize that we were doing anything wrong until I became 13 and started having Boyfriends.
DR O.C Pringle: Until you became what? Wait how old were you?
Myrna: This, sexual abuse, began at age 10.
Dr O.C Pringle: Wow did anything ever happen to this guy?
Myrna: No, because like most children I didn’t say anything about it. I told no one. This book was my first experience talking about it and I in my 40’s when I wrote, Out of the Snares. My dad read the book and was very upset that he did not know this was going on.
Children carry a lot of shame regarding, sexual abuse, I still carried shame when I wrote, Out of the Snare. As you can see I used my maiden name Trotman for the author name.
Dr. O.C Pringle: So, you placed Myrna Bernadette Trotman on the cover of the book, because you didn't want people to know it was you, but your picture is on the cover!!
Myrna: I started to release shame when I started talking about the, sexual abuse, and when I learnt that children can’t give consent for sex. So whatever guilt and shame that I had attached to my, sexual abuse, I released it.
Dr O.C Pringle: Well listen it worked out for your good, but all things work together for the good of them that loved God and are called according to his, purpose, so your, sexual abuse, worked in your favor. You were able to redirect that energy into something positive where you're helping people all over the world. You're on radio and on television, yes you are some kind of a woman.
Out of the Snares, a story of hope and encouragement
Myrna: Out of the Snares, is made up of 10 principles in life that we should live by:
Keep Your, Vision, in Front of you– Dare to dream big dreams and understand the principles of vision casting.
The events in your life whether good or bad, work together for good– God said I know your expected end. Stay the course; don't give up until you win.
Let the, Universal Laws of Attraction, the, Laws of Intention, work for you– Ask and it will be given unto you.
Have a, Positive Mindset– Take control of your thoughts and attitudes. Get rid of ANTS (Automatic Negative Thoughts)
Use what you have in your hand– You were created with a purpose; God gave you the skills and talents you need to complete your task. Stop waiting for the right time.
Be intentional about your Growth– Be proactive, be intentional, build on your gifts, and continually improve.
If you build it, they will come“ Be a servant first.
Find your Passion– it is the Fire in your belly. Become conscious of what lights you up. God put that Fire in your belly as a beacon to achieve your purpose.
Love– it is what makes this Human experience worthwhile. Love yourself first. Love is spirit, God is spirit.
Business Consciousness– how to create a startup company and succeed in marketing.
Have you guys ever wondered why David when he was going to fight, Goliath, carefully selected five, stones, even when he knew that he only needed one, stone, to kill, Goliath? The reason was he was confident. He was confident because he knew that God was with him. It didn’t matter that he was a little person and, Goliath, was a giant. He knew that God would help him to slay that giant, like God helped him slay lions. So he knew he needed one, stone, but he carefully selected, five stones, and that’s what we’re going to be talking about today.
Bishop Anthony Banks is going to talk to us how we can, select, stones, for battle and, cast these stones. We, cast stones, so that we can too can slay the giants in our life. Like David we can, slay the enemy, that is coming towards us. Just be sure, don't cast stones if you live in a glass house! So make sure you read or listen to end, because I never heard a message on this topic before and I have been a Christian for over 20 years. This is unique informative and content.
Bishop Banks is a visionary, who is committed to excellence in ministry. Banks also has a passion for reaching the lost and to make disciples for Christ who are changed for life as is going to be our topic today. Bishop is the author of the soon-to-be-released book, to Cast A Stone. So, we’re going to be talking about, casting stones. Bishop is going to explain why God gave him that message and why he wanted to share it with the world.
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Myrna – The first question I want to ask you is what prompted you to write the book to, Cast A Stone?
Bishop Banks – Well, it was prompted out of a desire to have better understanding of reading the Bible. People usually send you to find what you need spiritually, but what I found is in my early days of reading the Bible. I didn’t really understand what the Bible was saying and so as I’ve matured and now provide training to ministers, I realized that I could make things simpler for people. So, it really was prompted out of that and as well the manuscript has been sitting on a computer for about nine-ten years.
So, I started thinking on some things and realized I need to go ahead and get this out and get it into the hands of people. The realization came about that people are missing a lot of times on what they need. We hold on so tightly to what God puts inside of us and we won’t release it out.
Miles Monroe encouraged me to write to Cast A Stone
To Cast A Stone, was born out of that and mainly I think Miles Monroe and encouraged me to get the book out. He told me that there are people who need to hear specifically from me. There are things that you’re holding as well that other people need to get and receive to make them better.
Myrna – Why this particular topic, To Cast a Stone?
Bishop Banks – Well To, Cast A Stone, has to do with the fact that in the scripture Elijah was told to go to a certain brook and he was told that at that particular brook he'll be sustained there.
What I've done is in this my book, I have provided information in, to cast a stone, that will sustain people if they’ll read it. So when you go into that place, your brook, you’ll find that there are things there that will help you when you encounter life situations. It will help you to move forward at this place and become sustained by GOD. To, Cast A Stone, offers a lot of encouragement. There are some specific things in the book that speak to leaders, young people, men and women. It’s very diverse.
Okay to, cast a stone, is to go in and find it and prepare yourself to cast it.
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Myrna – Alright, so I thought that we were talking about when David picked up, five stones, to cast and kill, Goliath, did I misunderstood that?
Bishop Banks – No, you didn’t. There’s also a part of it, David, casting a stone, is a part of the book. David, cast a stone, using his faith in God. David is an example of the faith that's necessary to, defeat the enemy. When David picked up, five stones, he had to do that by faith because it's just a rock and he was up against a giant. You have a certain amount of faith, and David did the work, because he had to reach and get the stone, prepare to launch it and then, cast a stone. So, no, you didn't misunderstand.
The other part of to, Cast A Stone, speaks on Elijah at the brook, because the book is where you can go and be sustained as well. The actions that David took are the works and scripture tells us that faith without works is dead. If David had not got reached and gotten the, stones, then surely he'd have been dead. Goliath, would have killed him and fed his body to the dogs like he was threatening to do. But David did the work, he carefully chose his weapons, stones. He had the faith that God would show up and help him to kill, Goliath, with these, stones.
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Knowledge we gain from books is only power if we use it
The hardest thing for us to do sometimes is to crack the pages of a book, but it's work that has to be done. If you don't do that work, you'll have it sitting right there on your table. Whether it's the Bible or a book that someone's written, it'll be on your table. Everything you need is right there to slay whatever's in front of you. It'll sit there idle if you don't do the work of opening and cracking it. We all have to do work, we cannot change in life without doing the physical work.
Myrna – Haven’t you heard people say knowledge is not power until you use it? But the reason I was so interested in this particular topic is why do you think when David was looking for those smooth, stones?
Bishop Banks – Of course, what was he thinking of when he selected those, stones. Let's use the analogy for somebody right now that's preparing to slay a giant and they are selecting their tools or their weapons in order to slay the giant. We're not physically going into a brook or getting stoned.
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Myrna – So how can somebody use that information in real life?
Bishop Banks – Well, I think I would if I had to use it as an analogy. David would say that especially, spiritually speaking if you're reaching into the word of God to find specifically what you need. David will have us to understand he had a sense of weight when it came to the, stones, he chose. Also it said he chose smooth, stones, which means there could have been some rough ones there, but he knew the trajectory that he needed right from his experience of launching them. It wasn't going to work and so he may have used rough ones at a certain time for certain things, but he chose smooth, stones, for this giant.
I would say that even in scripture when you go into scripture, this is why the book is important because sometimes you can go in scripture and be so general on the surface. A lot of my own personal experiences also are in the book along with scripture that helped me to get through. I think that if people read the book they get in there, they'll find that there are things that they can launch out from their experiences. If you don't have experiences, I think when we read the Bible, we forget we check it as just a spiritual book, but those are people's literal experiences. We have to sometimes look at exactly what they were going through and not just one verse, but exactly what led up to that.
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Use your Life experiences when choosing your Stones
You see, even with David, His experience was that of a shepherd. What I mean, he was coming to bring lunch to his brothers, he wasn't expecting to, fight a giant, but when he got there he realized there's something here that is against what God's doing. So, he went and found what he needed and I say to people find what you need. People can suggest the scripture to you, but it may not fit what you need right. You have to find what you need specifically and then, cast that stone. We know that the launching part of it or the casting part of it, David had a slingshot. We have our mouth.
Life and death is in the power of the tongue, but you got to have the right words or, stones, to speak.
I would say clearly, going into the word and finding specifically the, stones, that you need to launch for the giant that you're facing is important. I mean because you know life and death is in the tongue and we can use words as our weapons and that is what I've heard preached many times and which is what I also use in my life. Your words are the descriptors that you stand on, the things that you say out of your mouth is what is you're going to launch to the enemy.
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Myrna – That's good, I get it. One of the questions I have here for you Bishop, is what is the method that we can use to, cast a stone? We talked about finding the scripture that pertains to your particular situation. What pertains to the giant that you're fighting right now, one is scripture. So what are some of the other methods that we can use to find our, stones?
Bishop Banks – Well, I think mustering up your, faith. There's a situation in scripture where the disciples had issues and they thought Jesus was going to do something, move something around for them. He (Jesus) said I pray that your, faith, don't fail you, but it didn't change the situation. The same thing that you're going to launch out, I think with David his faith would have failed him. He never would have launched it because thought would have come into his mind that, casting a stone, was not going to kill a giant.
You've only got one, stone, you have had a certain amount of, faith, with that and I think faith is the key to any launching or, casting a stone. It'd be like throwing a baseball. If you're a pitcher, you pitch the ball now you can just throw the ball anywhere and not even go near where the batter is or you can throw that thing specifically at the target at the catcher's glove.
You see and you know if you throw it there and I think, faith, is like that. You have to launch it in the direction you want it to go and then on top of that what I said a minute ago you've got to be specific about where you're throwing it. You just can't throw it into the air and hope that something happens because, faith, doesn't work that way. I think that's what I would say is, faith is the key.
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Myrna – Okay, so that's awesome. You have a book and you talk about the brook that sustained Elijah.
You talked about the, stones, that you cast, it has to be going directly to the target you've got.
To have faith to know that when you, cast a stone, it's going to slay your giant or enemy
Myrna – What are some of the other things that you want the readers to walk away with in your book? I know that your ministry involves leaders, you also train ministers. You talk about them being disciples and also I'm pretty sure you talked about some of your personal stories that are in there. Now, tell us about the book. What you want people to walk away after reading the book?
Bishop Banks – Sure, I think you know the thing that I believe should happen once you read the book or come out of the book, is that you should be changed. Okay you absolutely should be changed. There's no way you would read, to Cast A Stone, and not come out with something of substance. I know it's substance because of my experiences that I've had in life that I share in the book.
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Conclusion
Myrna – Let's talk about your ministry. I know that you mention that you teach, you teach discipleships to people, but you also have a speaking ministry. So tell us how someone can get in touch with you for speaking engagements, to help them sustain wherever they're at, to help them, cast a stone, I mean all of that.
Bishop Banks – I do speak at leadership conferences and not just at ministries, I also can provide information to people in the business sector. When I say that I train leaders, it's not just church leaders. I can go into any setting and speak to leaders about leading. Not only that, I can also go in there and work with teams to pull teams together. I'm really good at that and so people can reach me at my email address anthonybanks1938@gmail.com or my phone number – 770-572-0547.
I'm glad to come and help any way. I can and I've really been trying to help ministries to grow. I’m currently at Loving Faith Ministries. I'm glad to come and speak in any situations whether it's young people, or older people, whatever business, it doesn't matter. I'm open to coming to speak at those engagements or marriage. I tell you, if you can work with teams in a teen situation sure where everybody wants to go their own way, then you can definitely work with organizational leadership as far as David goes you know you need to choose the, stones, that you are going to throw at the giant.
Myrna – Once again thanks for downloading this podcast, please remember to subscribe, rate and review if you found this content inspirational. Until next time blessings.
When we talk about the, renewing of the mind, it is not simply about changing or adjusting how you think, but renewing your sense of, self-consciousness. Renewing your mind, impacts your conscience, which is your sense of what is right and wrong. It impacts your heart, which in Hebrew literature is the center of your being.
Renewing your mind, runs much deeper than simply making confessions and changing how you think upon a thing. Apostle Paul teaches “And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind”
Pastor William L Glover speaks on the biblical principles of what God meant when He said “And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God.”
Pastor Glover just completed a powerful series on, renewing the mind, it was a four part series, you can watch the full series on the Mount Hermon Ministries YouTube Channel. But today we're going to pick some of the important pieces of that, renewing your mind, series to share with you.
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Dr. William L. Glover is the Senior Pastor of Mount Hermon Ministries. He also oversees the Dew of Hermon Early Learning Center and is Campus Director of Life Christian University at Mount Hermon Ministries. He has a strong mandate for Education, Missions, Leadership Development, Justice Ministry and reaching the lost for Christ.
Having ministered in nine different countries on 29 international trips, Dr. Glover is an anointed teacher, preacher, and international speaker. He has assembled ministry and medical teams that have seen thousands of souls saved and thousands more received desperately needed medical care. His passion is to reach the globe, but God has fashioned his heart in the shape of Africa.
Through Mount Hermon Ministries, he is very involved in reaching his community through educational empowerment. He is a founding board member of L.I.F.E (Lee Interfaith for Empowerment), a Network of Congregations committed to finding solutions to systemic justice issues in Lee County; is an Executive Board Member of Healthy Lee, a group of faith, business and health professions committed to inspiring healthy life styles, and chairs the Religious Affairs Committee of the local branch of the NAACP. Dr. Glover is also Co-Founder (with Pastor Cheryl Glover) of Redeeming Influence Community Outreach, a non-profit that serves blighted communities.
Dr. Glover has earned a Bachelor of Arts degree in Bible and Theology from Southeastern University (formally Bible College), a Master of Arts degree in Religion from Florida State University, a Master of Education degree in counseling from Florida A & M University, and his Doctor of Ministry degree in Theology from Life Christian University.
Dr. Glover is also the author of the three books: Justice: God, Nations, and Systems, which examines the role of faith in addressing systemic justice issues which plague the systems of men; 30 Days of Excellence, a daily devotional that focuses on cultivating a culture of excellence in Faith, in Speech and in Life; and Ready for the Harvest, a study on how to release the principle of seedtime and harvest into your life.
Book: Ready for the Harvest Transform Your Mind Podcast
Dr. Glover is married to Pastor Cheryl Glover. Four wonderful adult children enhance their lives: Brittney, Jade, Jana and William II. Dr. Glover credits God for His demonstration of goodness and continues to trust in His faithfulness throughout his Pastoral Ministry.
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Myrna – My first question to you Pastor Glover is why did why do you think God wanted you to preach on, renewing your mind?
Pastor Glover – that's an excellent question Myrna. I ended the 2020 year with a series of messages entitled, living in your redemption. The idea being that God had already paid the price for redemption and that he's redeemed our lives from destruction.
Whatever destruction has occurred in our lives, be it:
personal,
financial,
relational
emotional
mental
God has already invested in the price to redeem and restore us from that destruction. That message was received so well that I began to contemplate well how do I get people to embrace that, mindset, and the, renewing your mind, messages were born. If a person can hear something, but if it's not internalized and if it's not received, then it's not going to have an impact on their lives.
So that series of, renewing your mind, messages was born out of that realization of moving people from the point of where they are, to living in the redemption and, renewing their minds.
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Myrna – you talked about the three different parts of the, mind, that God wants renewed.
Can you share with us the three different parts of the, mind?
Pastor Glover – Sure there are different aspects to each individual sermon, but the broad overview is the reason the, mind, is important is found in the wisdom literature. Scripture reveals that the, mind, is connected to and influences:
our psyche
our conscious
and our heart
When we talk about, renewing of the mind, it is not simply about changing or adjusting how you think, but it impacts your sense of, self-consciousness. It impacts your, conscience, which is your sense of what is right and wrong. It impacts your heart, which in Hebrew literature is the center of your being.
So, renewing your mind, runs much deeper than simply making confessions and changing how you think upon a thing. Apostle Paul teaches “And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the, renewing of your mind”
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One is internal and one is external. It impacts our, psyche, our consciousness, and our heart. So it is the, transformation, of the total person, the total being.
What is the Flexible mind, the Fluid Mind and the Fixed Mind?
We need to have a conversation about what kind of, mindset, you are working with.
Is your, mindset, flexible?
Is your, mindset, fluid?
Or do you have a, fixed mindset? Which could be good or bad depending on what it's fixed on.
When we talk about the, psyche, the, psyche, being your sense of, self-consciousness. Why do we need, renewing of your mind, in your sense of, self-consciousness? Because it's our sense of awareness, our sense of, self-worth. It also is our mental and emotional health, so if your, mind, is not flexible, you need work in your sense of awareness.
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Some people who are not self-aware or there's some people who suffer from, low self-esteem, or there's some people who are damaged mentally and emotionally. If you don’t have a, flexible mindset, which means pliable then you will resist God doing the eternal work in your, psyche, to, transform your mind. So, in order for, transformation, to occur you have to have a, flexible mindset.
There can be no, transformation, if you're unwilling to change.
The Fluid Mindset
Conversely a, fluid mindset, means that you are evolving, you are open to change. If you don’t have a, fluid mindset, you internalize and have what some call “stinking thinking.” You have a toxic, mindset, about yourself or about people. For instance oftentimes when people experience hurt in a relationship, they'll say I’ll never trust another man again or I’ll never trust another woman again.
So, if you don’t have a, fluid mindset, you're not willing to let that hurt go and embrace truth.
The Fixed Mindset
The third, mindset, you mentioned was a, fixed mindset. Just like when we lay concrete, we have to do the work before the concrete sets, because once it sets it's fixed. So, we have to be careful what we let set in our minds. We have to do the work while the concrete is fluid and pliable.
A, fixed mindset, is like set concrete.
Renewing the mind, is like renovation of a house. You’ve got to rip out things, knock down walls or beliefs before you can put in the new things or new learnings.
When we're inviting God to, transform your mind, then we have to understand our, psyche, our, self-consciousness, and our heart. That's why the, mind, is so important because it is connected to all of these aspects of the human person and they're all interrelated yet distinct.
Myrna – Someone with a, fixed mindset, like concrete why did you say that God can use this person?
In the, Life coaching, world, when we talk about a, fixed mindset, we're saying that there’s no growth in this person. But if your, mind, is set like concrete, is it possible for it to be changed?
Pastor Glover – Well yes but again you must have awareness of your, fixed mindset. You can get at that concrete two different ways. Through, transformation, which speaks to internal work that has to be done. The word, transformation, comes from the Greek word metamorphosis and so that speaks of going through a, transformation, but it starts from the inside out.
The other word that's used is, renewing, which literally has to do with renovating. When concrete sets, the only way to change it is to get a jackhammer and that's very painful work. People oftentimes will not choose to do that work, because it is painful, noisy, and messy. But if you're going to lay a new foundation in your life, you must do the, mental, emotional and spiritual work to jackhammer a, fixed mindset.
Myrna – How can God jackhammer to change that, fixed mindset?
Fixed mindset in marital relationships
Pastor Glover – I think an example in the context of, relationships, particularly in the context of, marital relationships, a lot of work that has to be jackhammered in counseling sessions really has to do those, fixed mindsets, about marriage that have been set, but are toxic and are not healthy.
Couples have very different ideas about the foundation of a, marriage, and what it should be about. It is really about how men and women are socialized in our society. Young girls are socialized towards inter interdependent relationships. That's means they play together, they share much more readily than men do. They are invested in group success as they are reared and everybody kind of having a good time.
Boys are socialized totally different. They are taught to stand on your own two feet, be independent. Be a man, don't share your emotions. So, men are much less equipped than women in, marital relationships, to handle a, fixed mindset, that's why women are 10 times more verbal than men.
One of the fun exercises I like to do when I’m dealing with, communication, is I’ll ask the man and the woman to get a sheet of paper and have each one writes me all the feeling words they are aware of. The woman's list is four times longer than the man,
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I’m curious though you also say in your message that God can use a, fixed mindset.
Pastor Glover – When you lay concrete, it's properly set, it is suitable for what you want to build on it. So, let's pull in this conversation, purpose and destiny. If you have great purpose or great destiny, you have to take the time to lay the foundation. If your foundation is fixed, God can build on it.
People do not take the time to factor in the type of foundation they need to lay to accommodate their dreams and visions of what they want. That can be applied to anything, in my book “30 Days of Excellence” I teach that excellence is in the foundation that you lay for, purpose and destiny.
Be ye not conformed to the world but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.
Why did God say that do not be transformed to the world but be transformed by the renewing of your mind?
The World is Battling for your Mind
Pastor William L Glover – Because it is all a battle for the, mind. This simple principle is found in Proverbs.
“As a man thinketh so is he”
Your, mindset, determines the reflection of who you are and it determines who you will be.
We would never be greater than our thoughts about things.
We would never rise above our thoughts about things.
We will never allow ourselves to be pulled beneath our thoughts about things.
Our thoughts reflect where we are going.
It's a battle for your, mind. The world we live in today, people don't want to do the work, to think for themselves. There is professional, think tanks, and these, think tanks, think for people and feed them what to believe, what to say.
They all are vying for our, minds, we don't tune in to learn anymore from the news, we tune in to determine what we need to think. So, hence “do not be conformed to the world, but be transformed by the, renewing of your mind.
That, transformation,
happens through the word of God,
that transformation happens through your relationship with God
that transformation happens through a community of faith like-minded believers who are committed to growth.
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Your, heart, which is the center of your being, the seat of your soul and this is important because wisdom literature teaches us that we should guard your heart for from it flow the issues of life.
Everything that matters, that's important to us impacts our, heart. If the, heart, is injured, broken or unhealthy because the, heart, plumps the pumps the blood. The, heart, pumps the influence of that thing to your spirit and to your soul and to your body.
So, when we talk about the, transformation, then it's holistic and God is always at work in our lives trying to move us to a place of wholeness in all three of these areas as it pertains to renewal and, transformation.
As we wrap up how can listeners connect with Mt Hermon Ministries Fort Myers? Tell us about your books and how we can connect on social media.
You can connect with our ministry, we are currently streaming on YouTube and Facebook at MT Hermon Ministries. You can join us Sundays at 11 a.m. you can go to our website.
The justice book which is about your community of faith finding relative relevance as a
change agent in your community
30 Days of Excellence which is a 30-day devotion that cultivates habits of excellence in your life and
Ready for the Harvest which teaches us how to apply the principle of seed time and harvest in our lives and all these can be found on Amazon.
You can contact me personally at dr.wmglover0613@gmail.com
My Spiritual Father Helped in the Renewing of My Mind
I enjoyed the conversation, so thank you like we've known each other for 14 years let me also state how proud I am of you forging the way. I remember when you began this journey and witnessing your evolution and growth. Witnessing how God is enlarging your territory, makes me very proud. I want to encourage you to continue that journey.
Myrna – Thank you Pastor and I’ll share something publicly with you that when I wrote my book and you said that you're proud of me, it brought tears to my eyes because it was the first
Time someone told me that. My father had never said he was proud of me.
As my spiritual father thank you so much for saying that I appreciate it. God sent me to you specifically I didn't share our story of how I came to be under your guidance, but our connection has a purpose.
Thank you for tuning in to the Transform your Mind to Transform your Life radio podcast and television show. If you are um listening on iTunes I would love for you to subscribe, rate and review. I also want to invite you to join my Facebook group called Lifecoach.
