Dr Nina Savelle-Rocklin says “It's not about willpower” In her book How to, lose weight, without, dieting, Dr Nina says dieting leads to, eating disorders.
Dr Nina is also the author of “Food for Thought” a book about the treatment of, eating disorders.
Book: Food for Thought
Our emotions feed our food intake. Our brain responds to emotions and feelings making it hard to, lose weight. Dr Nina is going to teach us today about how emotions affect our ability to, lose weight, and leads to, eating disorders.
In keeping with the format of my show, today my tip of the week looks at how positive emotions and negative emotions affect our daily lives.
Positive emotions or feelings can be likened to yeast in a loaf of bread. They raise your energy levels so that you can attract like thoughts floating around in the universe.
Thought impulses mixed with emotion are picked up quicker by infinite intelligence and acted upon.
7 Major emotions that helps to, Lose Weight
There are 7 major positive emotions:
Desire
Faith
Love
Sex
Enthusiasm
Romance
Hope
These are the most powerful emotions for creating wealth and happiness.
There are also 7 major negative emotions that lead to, eating disorders
Fear
Jealousy
Hatred
Revenge
Greed
Superstition
Anger
Positive and negative emotions cannot occupy the mind at the same time. One or the other must dominate. You must make sure that positive emotions constitute the dominant emotions of your mind.
Form the habit of scanning your body to determine how you are feeling. If you find negativity immediately shift to a positive thought. With practice your positive emotions will dominate and negatives cannot enter in.
Negative emotions and feelings make you feel bad and makes us over eat, and impossible to, lose weight. Feeling bad is unnatural so we try to eat something, drink something, buy something or do something to make ourselves feel better. That is the source of addictive behaviors. You need to kill the ANTS. Automatic negative thoughts.
Check out my blog at blog.myhelps.us for more information on how to control your Automatic negative thoughts.
Guest Biography
Nina Savelle-Rocklin, Psy.D. is a psychoanalyst, author, speaker and internationally-recognized expert in weight, food and body image issues.
She has been featured in the Los Angeles Times, Prevention, Real Simple, Huffington Post and many other publications, and is a frequent guest speaker on podcasts, radio, summits and other events, including the prestigious National Meeting of the American Psychoanalytic Association.
Dr. Nina’s personal experience gives her a unique understanding of what it’s like to struggle – and she knows change is possible! She brings a fresh perspective by helping people understand “why” they turn to food instead of focusing on what they’re eating. In addition to her private practice, she writes an award-winning blog, Make Peace With Food, hosts a popular podcast, Win The Diet War with Dr. Nina, and offers “food for thought” on her video series, The Dr. Nina Show.
She has contributed to two psychoanalytic books, and her book “Food For Thought” on the treatment of eating disorders is to be published by Rowman & Littlefield later this year. Check out Dr Nina on the web at https://winthedietwar.com
Can you share your history and what led you to do this work?
Show Notes:
• Topic Discussion: It's Not About Willpower! How To, Lose Weight, Without, Dieting
•
• 2. Every year there's a new fad diet – low carb, gluten free, Paleo. Why do you think, diets, don't work?
•
• 3. What's the best way to deal with food triggers that trigger, emotional eating?
•
• 4. What role does self-acceptance and self-esteem play in, weight loss?
•
• 5. For our listeners who want to make changes, what are some of the things they can do to create change?
•
• 6. A lot of people lose weight but gain it back, or they're always in that yo-yo diet cycle. What causes people to sabotage their weight loss efforts?
So you are now an, Entrepreneur, and working for yourself! You are the Boss, the President and CEO! What do you do next? The first decision to be made is figuring out what Business structure works best for you.
Entrepreneurship – What makes one throw in the employment towel? Why do, Entrepreneurs, give up the guaranteed paycheck every two weeks? Work 14 hour days, and sometimes not even pay themselves. Why? I think it is because we are passionate about what we do. When you are passionate about what you do, you would it for free!
“Your work is going to fill a large part of your life, and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. And the only way to do great work is to love what you do.” –Steve Jobs, Co-Founder, Chairman and CEO, Apple
Is, Incorporation, or, Sole Proprietorship, the right structure? Are you “Minding your own business”? This is a term made popular by Robert Kawasaki in the book “Rich Dad, Poor Dad” and refers to the concept having regular employment while operating your own business on the side. Robert suggests that you have this dual employment status until your business on the side generates revenues equals your current pay check. This relieves the stress of supporting yourself and your family with revenues from a new business. Your Accountant can recommend the best structure for your company or you can refer to my self help start up guide “Minding your own business” available for download at www.shop.myhelps.us. Below is an excerpt from “Minding your own Business”
What New, Entrepreneurs, Need To Know:
As a new, entrepreneur, you need to know your federal Tax responsibilities. In addition to knowing about federal taxes, you need to make some basic business decisions.
What is the Form or Structure of your new Business?
The most common forms of business are the, sole proprietors, Corporations, Partnerships, LLC, and S Corporations. When beginning a business, you must decide which form of business to use. Legal and tax considerations enter into this decision.
Sole Proprietorship: A, sole proprietorship, is an unincorporated, small business, that is owned by one individual. It is the simplest form of business organization to start and maintain. The business has no existence apart from you, the owner, entrepreneur, Its liabilities are your personal liabilities. You undertake the risks of the business for all assets owned, whether or not used in the business. You include the income and expenses of the business on your personal tax return.
Corporations: In forming a corporation the, entrepreneur, and prospective shareholders exchange money, property, or both, for the corporation's capital stock. A corporation generally takes the same deductions as a, sole proprietorship, to figure its taxable income. A corporation can also take special deductions. For federal income tax purposes, a C corporation is recognized as a separate taxpaying entity. A corporation conducts business, realizes net income or loss, pays taxes and distributes profits to shareholders. The profit of a corporation is taxed to the corporation when earned.
Limited liability Company: A limited liability company ,LLC, is an entity formed under state law by filing articles of organization as an, LLC. The members of an, LLC, and the, entrepreneur, are not personally liable for its debts. An, LLC, may be classified for federal income tax purposes as either a partnership, a corporation, or an entity disregarded as an entity separate from its owner by applying the rules in regulations.
S corporations: An S corporation is a, small business, with an eligible domestic corporation can avoid double taxation (once to the corporation and again to the shareholders) by electing to be treated as an S corporation. Generally, an S corporation is exempt from federal income tax other than tax on certain capital gains and passive income. On their tax returns, the S corporation's shareholders include their share of the corporation's separately stated items of income, deduction, loss, and credit, and their share of non separately stated income or loss.
Employer Identification Number, EIN, is used to identify the tax accounts of employers, certain, sole proprietors, corporations, partnerships, estates, trusts, and other entities.
Some Other Considerations of your new, Entrepreneur, are:
Who are your customers?
How do you market to this select base?
What are my skills? What skills do I need to complete my team?
What is my vision? What is my plan to get there?
With the current state of the, economy, having a well-defined, target market, is more important than ever. No one can afford to target everyone. Small businesses, can effectively compete with large companies by targeting a niche market. Many businesses say they target “anyone interested in my services.” Some may say they target, entrepreneurs, homeowners, or stay-at-home moms. All of these targets are too general. Targeting a specific market does not mean that you have to exclude people that do not fit your criteria from buying from you. Rather, target marketing, allows you to focus your marketing dollars towards a specific, target market, and brand message on a specific, target market, that is more likely to buy from you than other markets. This is a much more affordable, efficient, and effective way to reach potential clients and generate business. For example, if you are a Florist, your customers could be anyone with a birthday or anniversary but you could decide to target the wedding market and put your marketing dollars towards that, target market. With a clearly defined, target market, it is much easier to determine where and how to market your company.
Here are some tips to help the new, entrepreneur, define the, target market:
As an, entrepreneur, you must know your current customer base
Who are your current customers, and why do they buy from you? Look for common characteristics and interests. Which ones bring in the most business? It is very likely that other people like them could also benefit from your product/service.
An, entrepreneur, must check out the competition
Who are your competitors targeting? Who are their current customers? Understand why they are targeting this demographic and then try to become innovative and offer something different. You may also find a niche market that they are overlooking.
Choose Specific Demographics for your, target market.
Figure out not only who has a need for your product or service, but also who is most likely to buy it. Think about the following factors:
Age
Location
Gender
Income level
Education level
Marital or family status
Occupation
Ethnic background
The, entrepreneur, must consider the Psychographics of Your Target Customer
Psychographics for, Target Marketing:
Personality
Attitudes
Values
Interests/hobbies
Lifestyles
Behavior
Determine how your product or service will fit into your, target market, lifestyle.
How and when will they use your product or service?
What features are most appealing to them?
What media do they turn to for information?
Do they read the trade journals, search online, or attend particular events to choose suppliers?
As an, entrepreneur, you must understand How Your Customers Think. Once you've decided on a, target market, be sure to consider these questions:
Will my target really benefit from my product/service?
Will they see a need for it?
Do I understand what drives my, target market, to make decisions?
Can they afford my product/service?
Can I reach them with my message?
Are they easily accessible?
You may be asking, “How do I find out all this information?”
Try searching online for research others have done on your, target market.
Search for magazine articles and blogs that talk about your, target market.
Search for blogs and forums where people in your, target market, communicate their opinions.
Look for survey results, or consider conducting a survey of your own.
Ask your current customers for feedback.
What are my skills? What skills do I need to complete my team?
The In's and Out's of Entrepreneurship
In the early days of running your, entrepreneurship, as a new, entrepreneur, it's natural to try to do as much as possible yourself. It's the most cost-effective, comfortable, sensible way to do things in the beginning. But as your enterprise grows, you'll find yourself stretched thinner and thinner. Eventually, you'll find you just can't continue to oversee operations and sales and accounting and fulfillment and marketing–and hope to continue to grow your, small business. When you reach this point, it's time to think about bringing other high-level managers or team members on board to help you out.
You need to build a senior team that's able to manage all the critical areas of your business to take it to the next level. Building your team demands matching jobs to people's strengths. That means giving people responsibilities according to skill level, not based on how close a friend they are, or how closely related they are to you, or whether you just like their sunny personality. Become Conscious of your strengths and the areas you lack the necessary skills. Eg. Are you creative? Can you design your marketing or branding materials? Are you skilled in sales? If not you need a sales team. When it comes time to hiring an executive team, you'll need to find people to fill the following roles:
Leadership roles in your Company
Chief Executive Officer (CEO). The fact of the matter is, the CEO is the boss of everyone and is responsible for everything. They determine the company's strategy. They hire and build the senior team. They make the final call on how resources get divvied up, and they're the one whose face appears on the press releases!. The CEO's skills must include strategic thinking, the ability to rise above the daily details and decide where the industry and business are headed. They must then be able to decide the company's best route for navigating the future market conditions. They have to be able to make good bets.
Some of the best are Steve Job; Apple; Bill Gates, Microsoft; Jack Welsh, GE.
The CEO's key skill, however, is in hiring and firing. The right management team can cover a CEO's shortcomings. A CEO may be able to set strategy, predict the future and control the budget, but if they don't hire the right team, they have to master it all themselves.
Chief Operating Officer (COO). A COO handles a company's complex operational details. Think about UPS moving three billion packages in the two weeks before Christmas: or think of a Florist delivering hundreds of flowers on Valentine day. The day after is too late! The company’s COO insures the business can deliver day after day. He figures out just what needs to be measured so he can tell if things are going well. Then his team creates the systems to track the measurements and takes action when the company isn't delivering. As an Entrepreneur, you are probably the President, CEO and COO. If you just take orders and do no planning and measuring then you will remain an Entrepreneur.
Your vision should be to grow up and become an Enterprise!
President. A president oversees staff functions–human resources, finance and strategy–while the COO oversees daily operations. the president can also be a synonym for COO, especially in smaller companies.
Chief Financial Officer (CFO). Plain and simple, your CFO handles the money. They create budgets and financing strategies. They figure out if it's better for your business to lease or buy. Then they build the control systems that monitor your company's financial health. The CFO is the “bad guy” who won't let you buy that really cool videoconferencing equipment and makes you pay down a commercial loan instead. While you mope about it in your office, the CFO will be busy figuring out which customers, business lines and products are profitable, so next year you can afford the really cool videoconferencing equipment.
Chief Marketing Officer (CMO). Recently, companies have been bringing in a marketing expert at the C-level rather than as just a vice president. The reason is simple: Many current business battles are battles of marketing, so corporate strategy often hinges on a marketing strategy. The CMO owns the marketing strategy–and that often includes the sales strategy–and oversees its implementation. The CMO will know (or learn) your industry inside out and helps you position your product, differentiate it from your competitors' products, enlist distributors, and make sure customers learn to crave your product. Think of Apple and the new IPhone 6!
All business Live or Die with marketing. I heard a story once about a new magazine start-up Company that hired a sales person to go door to door and sell subscriptions to the magazine as their marketing plan. The magazine was a very good magazine but the business failed because the sales person (their only form of marketing) did not sell a single subscription in 6 months! I am marketing to you the reader of this Blog right now! Marketing can take many forms; but it is the blood of a business. Without it, your business dies.
Chief Technology Officer (CTO). A CTO should keep up with technology trends, integrate those trends into the company's strategy, and make sure the company keeps current when it's necessary. You need a CTO if technology impacts your business or industry strategically.
Entrepreneurship is about going for the things that are much bigger than what you could do alone. Your job isn't to reach the goal; it's to build a team that will reach the goal. If you really want to reach your goals, you'll need to bring on others to help, and creating a good executive team means knowing what you need them to do, finding good candidates, and giving them what they need to do their jobs. If you choose well, they'll be successful and make you successful as well.
Qualities of an Entrepreneur Leader
Vision – The Universal Energy behind your dreams
“Some believe there is nothing one man or one woman can do against the enormous array of the world's ills — against misery, against ignorance, or injustice and violence. Yet many of the world's great movements, of thought and action, have flowed from the work of a single man. A young monk began the Protestant reformation, a young general extended an empire from Macedonia to the borders of the earth, and a young woman reclaimed the territory of France. It was a young Italian explorer who discovered the New World, and 32 year old Thomas Jefferson who proclaimed that all men are created equal. ‘Give me a place to stand,’ said Archimedes, ‘and I will move the world.’ These men moved the world, and so can we all.”— Robert F. Kennedy
Pat Riley’s vision was to win a Championship for Miami. So he put together his team with his star players; Lebron James, Dwayne Wade and Chris Bosh. Then he needed supporting players, each with supporting skills. He also needed the right coaches! Vision, The right team and execution won him not One but Two Championships!!
Oleg Lougheed has a very interesting story of how he turned the, adversity, of his birth in Russia, living in an, orphanage, from 9 years old and then being adopted by an American family at 12 years old.
I love stories, right now I'm like almost addicted to Oprah's master class, because all she does is ask these influencers and stars to share their story and it always starts with their childhood. Oprah spends an enormous amount of time on their childhood story, because your childhood is what shapes into the person you are today.
Listen to the full interview here:
Introduction to Oleg's story of Adversity
The memories made in the first 12 years of my life were painted with shades of, poverty, loss, and a dim hope for a better life.
A hope that acted as my only survival method.
A hope that got me where I am today – 5,500 miles across the world – 5,500 miles between myself and the life I was destined to live.
I said goodbye to my birth Mother at the age of 12, not realizing that I would never see her again. I never met my Father.
I learned early on what alcoholism was, what starvation felt like, and what sacrifice meant.
For me, it took leaving the place I called home to find a better life in America.
It meant saying goodbye to my Mother, Sister, relatives, friends, and saying hello a new family and new friends.
At 12 years old, I was adopted from an, orphanage, in Chebarkul’, Russia to a family in Ann Arbor, Michigan.
Adoption, changed my life.
Adoption, opened a door into a new world and forced me to close the door to everything I had ever known.
I am here today to tell my story.
The story of how I overcame my own odds.
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One of the reasons I love your story Oleg is because you've used your, adversity, to propel the, opportunity, you were given by being, adopted, by an American family.
Oleg says, adoption, changed his life which you know sometimes, adoption, is good and sometimes it does not take. I am also an adoptive mom so I can identify a little bit with your story.
I was born poor myself in, Guyana. I did not encounter starvation. or alcoholism and I was not, adopted; but my maternal aunt sponsored my mom and her three kids to move to Canada to live a better life.
My first question is, we're your adoptive parents able to heal the pain you experienced the first 12 years of your life?
Oleg – Before I share about my, adoption, let me give you some context into my own background. I'd like to acknowledge the fact that stories do play a critical role, overcoming adversity. Everything revolves around the story we tell ourselves. Our internal dialog.
My world shifted from, adversity, to, opportunity, when I stopped being the victim. As you had mentioned being born in Russia and living there for the first 12 years of my life and having experienced quite a bit of difficulty and, adversity, and tragedy.
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I began to realize I did not have the mindset that I have today. Back then I did not have the resources; I did not have the knowledge that is found in the book “Think and Grow Rich” and other great books.
So, for me it was about figuring out from day to day how to survive. It is funny that you mentioned Oprah because Oprah had a similar impact on my life. I once watched a video of Oprah sharing her story and there was a segment in that story where she spoke about her childhood and the trauma that she faced when she was a young girl.
One of the ways that she was able to, overcome adversity, was by believing in a better future or a brighter day. That is exactly how I survived as a child, by believing in a brighter future. Thinking of a brighter future, when I was nine years old, I was faced with the decision to either continue living with my mom and my sister or go and live in an, orphanage.
I chose to go live in an, orphanage, not realizing that meant not seeing my mom and sister again. I was adopted at 12 years old. I was able to come to the United States and hit the restart button. I think, adoption, has really helped me recognize that my life of, adversity, leading up to it was a dress rehearsal for the, opportunity, that lies ahead.
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After I was, adopted, I remember I was looking back upon my past and I lived in, victimhood. I lived in, victimhood, because I looked at all of those previous circumstances and asked, “why me.” I began to realize after a couple years that I could turnaround, adversity, into, opportunity.
That is when my life started to shift once again. I started my desire and passion for personal growth and personal development. Started seeing, opportunity. I did not just read books anymore I became a part of those books.
Myrna – My circle back question is “Do you feel that your, adoption, was Successful? Were you able to adapt to your new family and be not being able to see your birth mother?
Oleg – Before I fully answer that question, it's important to identify what successful, adoption, means to me. One of the biggest reasons why I choose to look at my, adoption, experience as successful as my parents were and still are tremendous human beings. They never raised their hand on me, they've always kept an open mind and open heart regardless of what the situation and circumstances I presented as a teenager.
Teenage boys not all; but some do not always make the best decisions, especially those who had a painful past from, adversity; but that is one of the beauties of my parents, even though we went through the ups and downs. We went through the multiple years of therapy both individually and collectively as a family. What really made this journey was beautiful that they continue to be there for me every step of the way.
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Myrna – It was an, opportunity, which is why we're talking about turning, adversity, into, opportunity.
Podbean
Why you think, adoption, changed your life?
Oleg – For me, adoption, one of the changes in my life was because it gave me a second chance in life. It gave me another, opportunity, to live the life that I once upon a time dreamed of. After going through, adversity, from a very young age and then after the, adoption, I chose a different story.
I started to ask the question “what am I here to learn”? What is this, adversity, here to teach me? I started to pair each one of those, adversities, with a lesson or a takeaway. My perspective became completely different. I was no longer letting the circumstances define me; but rather I was looking at those circumstances as something that I can learn from to move forward.
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Oleg – I started to tap into purpose. I was able to approach that initial question of” why me”? through the lines of if not you then who. I started to experience this sense of energy that was flowing through me from the, adversity, of my birth. I asked myself, what do I channel this energy into? I wanted to create a space for people of similar experiences such as those who are, adopted, or have gone through the foster care system. Create just an open space for them to share their experiences to be able to embrace and accept all aspects of that journey.
I wanted to highlight all the, adoption, and foster care stories because, how can a prospective, adoptive parent, know of the other side if they're only being presented with the side of the social worker.
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Author interview Transform Your Mind Podcast
When I started this, I received quite a bit of criticism, but I just started to create a space for people to write in comments or share their story. Eg my, adoption, was terrible because of x y z. I would just say “why tell me more.”
I was recently reading a book by David Goggins Can't Hurt Me
Myrna – OMG I love that book!
Oleg – There's a section in the book where he talks about judgment. Goggins says why judge anyone if you can still remember the feeling of being judged yourself. I started to realize that one of the reasons why I chose to not only respect myself; but respect those surrounding me is because in a way I've experienced what it was like to not be respected or
not be taken seriously.
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Now have a podcast called “Overcoming the Odds” it is all about creating a space for other people who lived through, adversity, to be heard and to be seen and to be appreciated through their stories.
I am a huge believer of choosing to lead from within so if I haven't experienced it myself, I’m probably not going to go into that area.
I am not going to speak from an experience that I haven't gone through.
I remember when I was first starting to explore the possibility of having a Podcast, I listened to podcasts like the time Tim Ferris show, Lewis Howes School of Greatness and Tony Robbins podcast. I noticed that. many of the guests were Influencers or stars, I realized that I wanted to do something different.
I wanted to shine a light on humans because I truly do believe that every single person has value to offer to this world, not only those who have made it or are successful but those who turned, adversity, into, opportunity. Our society is only interested in the stars' stories and podcasters are only interested in interviewing these stars because it builds their podcast.
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How can our listeners and those watching on YouTube connect with you?
Listeners can connect with me on Linkedin. That's where I spend the majority of my time. Part of the work that we do is we host events that focus on different themes and elements of the personal narrative. Our event this January is called “Survive to Thrive Attitude of Gratitude”
It's really about tapping into, gratitude, but not solely through the lens of who or what you are grateful for; but digs deeper.
You can also connect with me through our website “Overcoming Odds” and you'll be able to find us through Facebook and other social media channels @oleglougheed
Conclusion
I want to remind you to subscribe on the Transform Your Mind YouTube channel. To listen to the full interview of my conversation with Oleg head over to iTunes or wherever you get your podcasts and remember to leave a review and subscribe.
I would like to also invite you to join my Facebook group called life coach. We have a lot of Life coaches in the group who share inspirational messages every day including myself.
Thank you
Until Next time Namaste
Divine Forces is a collective of Recording Artists coming together to incite conscious awareness and unity of “ALL”. By utilizing
our Divine gifts we aspire to enlighten, entertain and empower you. Our purpose is to inspire, and uplift you thru the force of
music, words, and art, all in the spirit of love.
Keke Wyatt Song Oui from her Keke Covers album. Original song by Jeremih. Listeners can find song on Youtube by searching Keke Wyatt or clicking on the following link:
The concept of, dream big, is to not let yourself become small. Not just react to what life's dishing out. We need to, dream bigger, because the universe gives you exactly what we ask for. If you ask for 50 cents instead of $1 you will get 50 cents.
Ilona Selke, shares The concept of, dream big, is to not let yourself become small. Not just react to what life's dishing out. Today on the Transform Your Mind with Coach Myrna podcast. I am so excited to be talking to international best-selling author Ilona Selke. Ilona who is currently travelling the USA directly from Bali where she spends seven months of a year.
So envious, Ilona is promoting her new book, “Dream Big, the Universe is Listening”. We're going to be talking about shifting your reality in the, quantum, matrix. I meditate every morning and then I go walking and meditate some more while I listen to podcasts. This morning I was listening to the Hay House World Summit podcast and the guest was Dr. Bruce Lipton, he was teaching us that, Quantum mechanics, or the, quantum, matrix is the foundation for all Sciences.
Chemistry and Biology sit on top of, Quantum mechanics. When I came back from my meditation, I put a note in my journal that I needed to read some more, quantum, matrix books. Then as I going over our show notes, I noticed that your book is about the, quantum mechanics, and that we're going to be talking about, quantum mechanics. I look forward to fast tracking my learning!
Ilona – Yep, the Universe is indeed listening, Bruce Lipton's book title is “The Biology of Belief,” he talks about what he calls Epigenetics. I love the fact that he talked about the, Quantum Matrix. Someone was saying that we when we watched the movie The Matrix, that it looked like science fiction; but we could be in something similar to that in real life.
The subtitle of my book it's called, Dream Big, the Universe is listening, I know we have all these religions across the world and no matter who they believe the right version of God is, there is only one source. Let's just be honest, if there were multiple sources we'd have a war on our hands. Source multiplies itself and then humans interpret it differently.
Formulate your prayer if you want to pray or if you meditate your visualization in such a way that the universe can decode your message. The Universe has its own language and we don't need to learn a computer language. Luckily we are endowed with a language, but most of us do it incorrectly. I want to help everybody do it in a way that the Universe will start listening.
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Ilona is an International Best-selling Author, seminar leader, lecturer, musician CEO and co-founder of Living from Vision. Ilona has inspired thousands of people worldwide to discover the power of their consciousness and to create successful lives. Ilona has written four books, produced music and meditation CDs, co-authored two books one with Brian Tracy, and one with Jack Canfield, she also has been a regular guest on A&E, Bravo TV with Jack Canfield, and a producer and TV show host for Quantum Living show on women's broad broadcast TV.
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Why we should, Dream big
One of the things I set out to figure out was how to talk to the Universe. I observed regularly is that whenever I said I don't want something, that's what I got. Can you imagine, I was so delighted to figure out that I recognized one definite Law of the Universe, which was “I got what I didn't want.” I'm gonna ask you to not think of a pink elephant.
Can you do that? I don't think so. I want to know what is in your head right now? A pink elephant! I figured out the Universe. If I say I don't want a bicycle for my Christmas gift, guess what the Universe is going to give me for Christmas? When I said I don't want a bike, I visualized the bike and made me manifest it. I learned to, dream big.
I figured out the Universe has a law which is it gives me what I don't want. Maybe God or the Universe has a different plan. I could say I want to be in that big castle, I can see myself in it. I should say something I really want. I want millions of listeners to my podcast. Let's say millions of listeners, that's what I want. All these people who are sitting on this planet listening. They are ignited they are excited.
There are others who are also listening right now, millions of them, they are listening and we are one. We are all vibrating together. It's not just one here in the neighborhood, and one there, we are collectively globally. A large group of people and we are all building the new world. We are shifting the paradigm together and we are millions and we are listening and we are taking the lessons and making them real in our daily life to prove to ourselves and our family that this Universe is listening.
Dream Big
That this paradigm is really living. This is what I did when I was 10 years old. I just had to learn about changing that no factor, and then when I'm 14, I said okay I'm going to go teach the world to be creative, and so I always say when you do, make sure you always add that little sentence that says “for the highest good”
Here are three easy steps to, dream Bigger:
Describe it
Imagine it,
Feel it
Allow yourself five minutes, the luxury of being in your fulfillment. Five minutes, millions of people just see it. Five million listeners around the world. How would you feel right now if you had five million listeners?
Myrna – I would feel good. I would feel that I was given a mandate from God and I would protect that mandate by caring for my 5 million listener. I would make sure they are fed, inspiring messages every week and that my platform will contain good content. I have the intention that I want to reach the world before every recording.
I want to give you a little synopsis, Dream Big, the Universe is listening, and then we're going to dive in little deeper in her book. Ilona takes you into a journey into the greater mystery of the universe, she takes you step by step, as she mentioned earlier through fascinating stories and how to manifest your goals and, dream big.
At the same time you, dream big, you create a better life for yourself. In the planet we're a living in a consciousness interactive universe. For you to become the master of your destiny, you need to dive into your subconscious mind and reach into your super consciousness. Ilona travels across the globe teaching other levels of consciousness.
She describes in easy-to-follow steps just how magical life really is when you learn to, dream bigger. After reading her book, you will come away inspired and equipped to make your dreams come true and create a better life for yourself on this planet. Check her out at www.ilonaselke.com.
What is the biggest lesson you think that readers can take from the concept of, dream big?
Ilona – The concept of, dream big, just itself, I've had people who just take the book and go oh my God I've let myself become small. I've let myself just react to what life's dishing out. All the demands and I've forgotten to, dream big,. I've forgotten to listen to my own self. So sometimes just holding the book in their hands without opening a page they've gone to the place of, dreaming bigger.
I want to remember to take time for myself and to, dream big, again because maybe we had dreams of who and what we wanted to do, and then some of them got either fulfilled or not. We have kids and get stuck at home, or as a woman, do the providing job thing, and feel like we're trapped in a rut. That's when we need to take time and to, dream big, to think about what we want.
To listen to our soul, to our heart, and to step back out of the house. Buzz out of our life and to step back and to do what's really meaningful to us. I said I'm going to give away a free app, that will guide people about God. Listeners can do this for 5 minutes every day, even if you just do that you start setting up a habit, where your soul and heart, your spirit will start saying thank you for listening to me.
It'll start giving you nudges, it'll start coordinating things for you. People will call you at the right time. I've had people who walk into a bookstore and my book literally fell into their lap. You put out the vibrational frequency, and anything that matches it, will come in.
I hate to admit it is that unfortunately the mass number of people are more interested in soap operas and dramas and disasters, rather than making their lives better by, dreaming big.
You don't have to follow any religion. You can just simply tune into the universe, which I call the source, and start your own conversation. Start talking to god by sitting down and saying what you need. Set up a conversation with this higher power, God and then if you have a desire and wish and needs, a dream or something you want to contribute to the world, just ask for it.
Let's say you need a certain amount of money every month, you may think hell, I need to be able to travel the world, I need to travel to other countries, I need to see other cultures to expand my horizon, that's what I really want. The universe says, ok. If we catch ourselves saying well I really want to travel the world; but then in your heart you feel these I have responsibilities, I don't want to leave, I'm afraid, maybe I get sick or whatever all your butts, they are the reasons why we stay where we are, stuck.
Because you're giving conflicting information. You're saying, yes I want it, but then you're saying well no, I don't want it because of that. Those little voices are usually not that loud, we feel them we try to ignore them, we try to say no, no I'm not really thinking that.
Dreaming Bigger in the Quantum Field
In my book, Dream Big, the Universe is Listening, I give techniques of how to deal with those little butts and snarling voices, or those tight feelings in the tummy, because they are at first blockages. Later on that block becomes your stepping stone. I tell you I am teaching this technique to doctors, therapists, hypnotherapists, all over the world. A lot of them have taken it to substitute the other techniques they used to use, because this one really works.
Myrna – It definitely does. I like what you said about there's just so many people that are interested in reality TV shows and sports and the news and things like that and don't spend any time, dreaming big. I wrote my first book “Becoming Conscious, my Awakening, about four years ago and that's basically when I started to understand synchro destiny and, Quantum matrix, and envision and all the things that you talk about. I'd be on that path and that's one of the reasons my vision was to have this radio program and then podcast. I talked about transforming your mind because that's where it starts.
Ilona – There are four different interpretation. One of them actually allows for the idea that we live in the universe that has parallel dimensions and parallel realities all at coexisting simultaneously. I train teachers and coaches, we have the course in Chinese we have students in China and Czechoslovakia in Germany in England and Spanish English Spanish, French, German, Czech, Chinese, and my books are out also in Hindi, and in Czechoslovakia and Russian, so we try to go worldwide.
All humans alike they don't really well I mean they like to have an idea of how the universe works but the trick to creating a shift in the matrix of time-space is to slowly but surely build up your miracles, so that you really feel the universe is listening to you. Talk to it and you can transform your negative doubts and beliefs and pave the way for the beautiful expression of who you really are.
Scientists don't even believe in God, but the quantum physicists say well there is something weird going on which implies that there is a greater intelligence at work. All of them right now are trying to develop a new worldview and quantum physics has lent itself the closest to different understanding. It's a modern way of saying there is a God and there is the observer affect. The observer who is looking at the experiment is changing the outcome!
I actually published in the book with Jack Canfield, he's the co-author of Chicken soup of the Soul, and the chapter about it is really about a Mind Bender, I described how I close my eyes and talk this mind-bending story through to God and I see the techniques are the same. You become clear on what you want you imagine what it would look like.
If it had already happened and you feel as if it had already happened, so in my body and bones I was sitting there not only visualizing being arriving on time and being in the end result. I'm not only applying myself, but I'm also feeling in my bones. It takes a lot of practice. I tell people is start small. I started creating parking lots and then build your way up build your confidence up.
I definitely need some help. I've been working and working on this thing for a while and I'm a very I'm a deterring person. It's hard for me to visualize. I can get the emotion and I can talk myself through it, but I want to see it in my mind.
I've got a trick for you. Here let's do this, because a lot of people are in your shoes, they go I can't visualize for anything. Some people are more kinesthetic types, maybe are one of them. I'm going to do a test for you and you're probably going to come out with flying colors like everybody who's listening.
How to Visualize and Dream Big
I would like you to visualize a tree as best as you can. Just a tree, an ordinary tree and move to one side of the tree, you're going to put a red dog and on the other side of the tree is a blue dog. Now I want you to take your index finger that you like the best and point it to the red dog just point. Which side did you point? Right side, okay well honestly some people have the red dog on the right some people have it on the left. Now tell me when you say you can't visualize, how come you knew that the red dog was on the right side of the tree?
I'm not seeing the dog. I can see the tree because I walk and see trees every day so I think I can visualize a tree, but I'm not seeing the red dog. I'm just imagining.
That works just as well because the most important aspect is the feeling. Imagine you're sitting down and having lemonade, as a matter of fact somebody serves you the lemonade and a good lemon cut open to a quarter and really fresh. You decide to bite into that lemon. You take that wedge of lemon and you're going to imagine you take it and you bite into it.
I'm tasting that sour, I'm not actually seeing it but I am like you can imagine thinking exactly. I imagine it in my mind. I'm a reader and I cry at movies and I cry when I see stuff. I cry when I read books, so I get myself in the picture. I want to see with my third eye and it's not happening.
Let me ask you one question. Did you start salivating more when I asked you to bite into that lemon?
Yes I did.
Ilona – I've lived with a lot of imaginary stuff. I visualized and, dreamed big, every day. I work on it, in fact I did this course called the “wealth magnet” and every morning I sit down I imagine different success things like what my what my Rolls-Royce is going to feel like when I drive it and what my big house, over looking the mountains is going to feel like!
There are two things when we say visualizing, one means representing to yourself something that is not currently physically in front of you; but you can put yourself into. Two, if you can create and feel the feeling of already doing it. Now when you say I'm visualizing myself driving in a Rolls Royce you giggled I can tell you that is the part of you that says I don't have it. I shouldn't be thinking that or it's funny.
You heard me talk about I want to have millions of listeners in order to do, I have to, dream big,.
Myrna – I would love for you all to review the podcast on iTunes. This encourages my guests and encourages other people to be able to listen to this life changing program. Ilona, so go ahead and tell them what the FREE GIFT is today for posting a review on iTunes.
Visit my website www.ilonaselke.com download the FREE app if you want to start your day with positive focus and be supported, I'll do that for you for free. I'll do that every morning with you. With my more meditative voice and with much more singsong in my voice. Also if you want to end your day on a good note come with me on this journey called “living from vision.” it's called the “Living from Vision” light App. It's available both on Google and Android. If you purchase my book, “Dream Big, the Universe is Listening” it will also give you the directions of how to get the App.
Dream Big, the Universe is Listening. This has been a very inspirational high-energy interview, we came out of the gate running like some racehorses. I loved it, we're out of time right now but Ilona is going to be back next week and we are going to talk about “How to find it your Soulmate” so be sure to tune in for that because you don't want to miss it.
Ilona – I'm going to share with you “How to have sex out-of-body” Wow, yes the men are going to come knocking now, women too! Well Ilona it has been an absolute pleasure. I definitely will go and not only get the free app but I'm also going to download your book, Dream Big, the universe is listening.
Thank you so much for spending the time with me today. For more information on Myrna Young, Life Coach visit me on the web at www.myrnayounghelps.com. I thank you listeners for tuning into www.wdjyfm.com, the Transform Your Mind with coach Myrna podcast, available on iTunes,Google Play, stitcher, and now on I Heart Radio, you can listen to it yet anywhere.
Until next time Namaste.
A, life lesson, can be defined as something from which useful knowledge or principles for, personal growth, can be learned. When I was growing up my grandmother had a lot of these, life lessons, and principles. One of them was you can lead a horse to the water but you can’t make him drink! Today we are going to be talking about, Z-isms. If you don’t know what these are, download the audio.
Listen to the full episode here:
My guest today is Matt Zinman called a difference-maker, devoted to personally enrich the lives of at least 100 million people by 2025. His new book, “Z-isms: Insights to Live By” is based on his experiences as an entrepreneur, athlete, single parent, caregiver and nonprofit founder. Matt is also the host of “Insights to Live By,” a podcast that invites guests to share their own pearls of wisdom. In addition, Matt is CEO of The Internship Institute, which he established in 2007 to “Make Experience Matter.”
book Z-isms life lessons to live by
Introduction to Z-isms or life lessons
One of your, life lessons, is about, self-discovery, and mindset. So what are, Z-isms?
Matt – A, Z-ism, is a, life lesson, a filter in how it is that we experience the world around us. One of the which is, mood, health. I think everyone recognizes that pessimism and optimism apply to the very same set of circumstances. If you're having that kind of a down day you could just as well be seeing something differently than if you were having an up day; so recognizing where you are in your, mood, health at any given time is one filter.
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Another principle of, life lessons, is are you staying present or are you caught up in worry about the future. Maybe you're worrying about something that isn't certain to happen or you keep running something through your head that already happened that continues to just spiral and drag you down and change your, mood.
It's important to recognize that you are in the, present moment, and grounding yourself in, gratitude, is very key. Then there's perception itself and recognizing that you may not get it all right; but that is okay. We're not all the best listeners all the time we could be distracted.
Gratitude is the best life lesson for Personal Growth
Myrna – A lot a lot of people start their mornings with a, gratitude meditation, because if you have, gratitude, for the smallest number of things then it is good. It doesn't have to be that your dream job or dream relationship is happening. We all have goals and we all have dreams. You might be depressed because you're not where you want to be in life; but if you can just be, grateful, for what you have now, then you are enhancing your, personal growth.
Louise Hay has a, gratitude meditation, on YouTube that I do a few times per week.
It's really basic being, grateful, that you have electricity, that you have a stove that you can cook on, gratitude, that you have indoor plumbing! Etc. There's so many things that we can be, grateful, for.
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Matt – Your point about, gratitude, is so spot-on right we hear about it so much and there's a reason that, gratitude, works. It's really at that heart of life enrichment. It is the premier, life lesson.
If you do that, gratitude meditation, for just two minutes in the morning and before bed, for 30 days straight, I guarantee it will change your life.
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Myrna – Let’s talk about, spiders. One of your unusual topics in your book involves being aware of, spiders. You describe, spiders, as people who manipulate and drain others. Why did you call them, spiders, because I call those people leeches. They suck you, what does, spiders, have to do with draining you? Tell me the concept there?
Matt – Spiders, do have quite a bite. If you really take inventory of the people who were in your orbit, it's pretty easy to go down that list and recognize that person we choose to be vulnerable with. We don't want to put energy into always having to be on guard.
It takes a lot more energy to be devious than it does to be oblivious. For the, spider, they must remember their lies. When you're living the life of a manipulator or devious person, it doesn't come naturally you've got to plan it out.
You really need to tune into your Spidey senses to recognize that someone is trying to get you to do something you prefer not to do; but they know you can’t say no. We talked about people pleasers. They are the perfect person for the, spider, to manipulate.
Myrna – So you call them, spiders, because they suck, they're devious and because they weave webs and set traps, understood.
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Matt – Spiders, are also energy vampires, very needy people who are always around wanting your time and energy.
You really need to take a closer look at that person and decide whether they belong in your inner circle. A, spider, is going to spin a web and set traps for you.
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What kind of, z-isms, or , life lessons, do you coach?
Matt – I usually start with teaching, self-kindness. It comes back to valuing yourself and if you value yourself first, the rest comes naturally. Relying on that guiding principle around, self-kindness, you just cannot go wrong.
Self-kindness, is the is the escape hatch when you are caught in the, spider, web. If you get yourself caught in a, spider, web and you're being manipulated, if think of yourself and think about the wars that you've won and you feel, gratitude, or all these things can power you to change the situation.
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Conclusion Z-isms Life Lessons
Myrna – What can readers get from the book after they've read it?
Matt – I want my readers to understand earned confidence and become aware of, spiders, and things around them
energy management,
entrepreneurship,
concepts around inevitability to a degree the law of attraction
and gratitude in life.
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We are the, author, of our lives. When we were born we had an beginning page and an end page. It is up to us to, author, and fill in the pages in-between. We are the, author, of the script, the director and the producer of our lives. Life by design, is what I teach as a, life coach. And I think that one of the first things that we can do is if we understand the power of self-amplifying feedback loops, the way our spaces influence our thinking and our thinking in turn influences our spaces. We could then control what happens to us by exercising creative control over the circumstances that we throw ourselves into.
There's always going to be the wild card. There's always going to be the circumstances you can't plan for; but, life by design, is the concept that we can use our thoughts and the, law of attraction, to bring to us all that we desire. There's always the unexpected relevance and the, serendipity. But just like that book The Power of Pull talks about, we can funnel the, serendipity, or we can channel the, serendipity, funnel. We can help engender and engineer serendipity by the choices that we make every moment, and live a, life by design.
We all have experienced the, serendipity, of relevant information arriving just when we were least expecting it.
It was only through pure, serendipity, that I met my best friend!
Your chances of finding such a feature are down to either extremely assiduous trawling or mere, serendipity.
So by cultivating rich social networks, by cultivating weak ties, not just closed ties but the weak ties, by becoming connectors and by connecting others so that they connect us, we create a world in which these self-amplifying feedback loops feed on top of each other. So good circumstances lead to other good circumstances which lead to other good circumstances and each one of them encourages us to then live more openly and participate in that sort of creative flow space. Live a, life by design.
Be the, author, of your own self-help book, I just really believe that our creative choices ultimately shape who we become and so we should all be discerning and be radically open whenever possible and I think that we really can make a masterpiece out of our own lives if we so choose. But that requires, it requires a boldness of character as well, because seeing the radical freedom to live a, life by design. We have to compose our lives, what Leary called internal freedom.
The vertigo of freedom, this dizzying – what do I do? I can do anything? Well, the paradox of too much choice. But I think we can embrace that with courage and with boldness, and once we do, there's nothing we can't do but, author, the life we want.
Author of our Own Lives
As the, author, of our own lives we can begin by taking control of our own lives. This requires recognizing that while family or social circumstances influence our character, they do not determine it absolutely. The same is true of the most basic instincts that come from our heredity and bodily constitution. These instinctive ways of acting can be molded and guided by the exercise of a will that heeds the dictates of a well-formed reason.
Our personality is forged to the extent that we make free decisions, since our actions not only alter our environment but also shape our way of being. Although at times we aren’t fully aware of it, the repetition of acts leads us to acquire particular customs or attitudes in facing reality. Therefore when we explain the reason for our spontaneous reactions, rather than saying “that’s the way I am,” we should often admit: “that’s the way I have made myself.”
Our lives are conditioned by factors that are often difficult to control: for example, the quality of family relationships, the social environment in which we grow up, an illness that limits us in one way or another, etc. Although often we are unable to ignore or undo these limitations, we can certainly change our attitude in confronting them, especially if we are aware that nothing escapes God’s provident care. “It is important to keep reminding ourselves that Jesus did not address himself to a privileged set of people; he came to reveal the universal love of God to us. God loves all mankind, and he wants all to love him. God is also the, author, and finisher of our lives. In any situation, even one that entails great limitations, we can offer God and our neighbors deeds of love, no matter how small these may seem. Who knows how great the value is of a smile in the midst of tribulation, of suffering offered to our Lord in union with the Cross, of patiently accepting small annoyances and setbacks! Nothing can quench a limitless love, a love stronger than suffering, loneliness, abandonment, betrayal, slander, physical and moral suffering, and even death itself.
Arika Pierce is a generational strategist and Attorney, author, a, millennial coach, and speaker. She introduced me to this new Terms, Xennial, and, Gen Z. Arika has a unique perspective and
has developed strategies and techniques to bridge, Millennials, and, Gen Z, to generations before and after them.
The term, Gen Z, is the micro generation between, Generation X, and, millennial. I was born in March 1980 and, Millennials, you know the years vary a little bit in terms of the source the
source that's defining, Millennials, but usually they're born between 1981 and 1996; and so I'm sort of in this in-between place where I remember life without you know technology being in
your hands and having the internet. I remember way before any apps.
The, millennial, generation is better understood than the, Gen Z, and they're more successful, they don't necessarily live up to the bad rap that they get in the media and from other folks so helping
them to sort of break out of that, millennial, negative brand.
All right, so what do you feel are some of the limiting mindsets that Millennials have?
I'd like to turn to your book on page 15, you say that, Millennials, are described as Entitled, Impatient, Tech Obsessed, Pampered, Self-absorbed and Lazy.
So, that's how people feel about them; but how do they feel about themselves? According to your research how does that affect some of the limiting mindsets that they have?
I think it's a great question, I wish more people would Ask, because I feel like there's lots of people that are talking about what they think, Millennials, are like and
not as many people asking what do, Millennials, and, Gen Z, know themselves. How do they view themselves? I'll say this I think that, Millennials, don't view themselves as any of these of these adjectives that you just Listed. Certainly none of these are very Positive; but I do think that they have a mindset that backed by parts of their upbringing. So, for example Millennials are definitely part of that feeling everyone gets a trophy generation. They definitely have a mindset where everyone is equal. I think in many ways that can be limiting especially as they transition to adults and transition into their careers and into the workplace.
Do Gen Z feel Entitled?
The reason why I say this is because I think, Gen Z, oftentimes feel they're entitled. They feel that on their first day of work they could be the boss.
Even though they have zero work experience, they still feel that everyone is equal and so they should have all the same access and an ability to share their mind and speak
their views.
Gen Z, communicate and the level of transparency that they're they've grown accustomed to again I think you know for, Gen Z, the mindset is that communication should be quick, it should be easy, you don't necessarily have to think too much about it, you could just send someone over a text message.
I think that can be limiting especially as you transition to work. Sometimes we need to be more thoughtful with our approaches especially at work and in professional capacities. I mean
sometimes you need to think through what you say, and how you say it, who you're saying it to.
Can you explain it what exactly is adulting and how does that relate to our topic on millennials today?
Adulting, just means that you're doing the duties and the responsibilities of a fully developed adult. Millennials, use it a lot you know to be funny; but I do think that there
is that the term does make a lot of sense. I mean I think it could be used as both a verb and an noun. I do think for, Gen Z, specifically the transition to adulting has been a
little bit tougher than previous Generations. So that's why there's so much emphasis on, adulting.
I see with a lot of, Millennials, that I Coach, I am a, millennial coach, there is a reluctance to sort of let go from Childhood.
What are some of the plays that you talked about in your book to help Millennials transition to, adulting?
What I try to do in the book is give very actionable advice. It'd be really easy to write a book and say go out and be a successful adult and make good decisions, Exercise, drink water, and keep a job and save money right? I would say a lot of us don't create goals; but the specifics are not there. So I really use every chapter to give very clear or actionable advice on how to do specific things. For
Example, when I talk about how to look for a job. I go through the Specifics.
Why it's important to have things like a LinkedIn profile, when you're applying for jobs.
How to make sure that you are presenting your best self on interview day. What to do in terms of following up after an interview.
Once you have the job, how to keep the job and again I am very specific. I say things like on your first day set three goals of the things that you
want to accomplish at that job.
Career Advice for Millennials
Do you want to work on a certain project? Do you want to get promoted within six months? Things like That. I go again very detailed to make sure you get to work on
Time. Getting to work on time, being at your desk ready to work as soon as you know you're supposed to be there. Etc.
Networking when you go to a networking event make sure you speak with three people and stay 30 minutes after. All of those types of things make you a successful adult. That's why I called it a,
playbook.
I tell stories of based upon my own, adulting, experiences.
I like what you say about your brand is that you are the CEO of ME Incorporated, the chief marketing officer for the brand to call you.
As a coach that's what I teach my clients, that you are you are the lid.
Conclusion
Arika how you readers pick up a copy of your book?
You can motivate yourself with the 3 P's Patience Persistence and Positivity. Learn, how to motivate yourself, with the power of, positive thinking.
Introduction to Positive Thinking
Synopsis of, Patience, Let's say you are stranded in the woods. It is dark and it is cold. You need to make a fire to stay warm and to cook anything you can catch. You find a dry stick and a hollow branch and you set about rubbing the stick and the branch together feverishly. You keep this up, rubbing and blowing patiently hoping to create a spark that could be nursed into a fire. You keep rubbing, and blowing. You have all day and all night….. you have, positive thinking, because if you don't you will surely freeze to death.
Persistence, – When you get tired you take a short break and then you get back to work. You tell yourself, “The fire will start”.
Positivity, You believe the fire will start. You keep your, positivity, by telling yourself “I will have fire, I will stay warm, I will have food to cook and eat”. You let none of the negative thoughts that pop into your head linger, you send them back immediately. Negative thoughts such as, you don't know how to a make fire, you are not a cave man, maybe the bush is wet and it will not light, you will die of hunger and cold because no one will find you.
No.. as soon as any of these thoughts come into your mind, you reject them and send them back!. You keep rubbing and blowing with increased vigor. You tell yourself “I shall live and not die”.
I use this vision to encourage myself when I am working hard and not seeing results. I need, patience, to keep on working hard knowing that one day I will succeed. I need, persistence, to do it every day and, positivity, to believe that I will succeed one day.
You can do the same. Find an inspirational story and use it as your map. Some real life examples are Arnold Schwarzenegger and Sylvester Stallone. Arnold built his empire and muscles,
One bicep at a time.
Arnold had the, patience, and the, persistence, to stick with his dream of becoming a world champion and playing the part of Hercules in the United States of America. His, Patience, Persistence, and, Positivity, assured him success.
Sylvester Stallone had to sell his dog for $50.00 because he was starving; but he had, patience, to wait until someone offered him the starring role for the script for Rocky, Persistence, to keep pedaling it to over 1500 studios in New York and the belief and, positivity, that he will succeed…… and he did.
You write a to-do list… but then you don’t follow through.
And this happens again and again and again. Seriously, what’s the problem?
You are not, motivated, So how do you, motivate, yourself?
Why are we so good at thinking of what to do; but so terrible at actually, motivate yourself, to actually doing those things?
Procrastination is a mood-management technique, albeit (like eating or taking drugs) a shortsighted one. But we’re most prone to it when we think it will actually help… Well, far and away the most procrastination occurred among the bad-mood students who believed their mood could be changed and who had access to fun distractions. Motivate, yourself so you can leave procrastination in the dust.
How to use, Patience, to, Motivate, Yourself
Meryl Streep on, Patience:
I no longer have, patience, for certain things, not because I’ve become arrogant, but simply because I reached a point in my life where I do not want to waste more time with what displeases me or hurts me. I, motivate, myself by have a low threshold for time wasters. I have no, patience, for cynicism, excessive criticism and demands of any nature. I lost the will to please those who do not like me, to love those who do not love me and to smile at those who do not want to smile at me. I no longer spend a single minute on those who lie or want to manipulate.
I decided not to coexist anymore with pretense, hypocrisy, dishonesty and cheap praise. I do not tolerate selective erudition nor academic arrogance. I do not adjust either to popular gossiping. I hate conflict and comparisons. I believe in a world of opposites and that’s why I avoid people with rigid and inflexible personalities. In friendship I dislike the lack of loyalty and betrayal. I do not get along with those who do not know how to give a compliment or a word of encouragement. Exaggerations bore me and I have difficulty accepting those who do not like animals. And on top of everything I have no, patience, for anyone who does not deserve my, patience.”
The Power of Positive Thinking
The most famous work of Dr. Emoto was published in 1999 and is called ‘Messages from Water,’ which has sold millions of copies all over the world. In the book, Dr. Emoto explains in detail that what we say, feel, and what we listen to has an effect on water. The research clearly shows how the power of, positivity, can transform anything in our physical reality. He uses water as an example. Since human beings are made up primarily of water (60-75% depending on the source), water has a direct effect on us.
Dr. Emoto placed rice into three glass beakers and then fills the beakers with enough water to submerge the rice. To the first beaker, he states the phrase (in Japanese): “Thank you,” “You’re an idiot” to the second, and ignores the third.
A month later, the rice that was thanked fermented and gave a pleasant smell. The rice that was affronted turned black. Finally, the rice that was ignored began to rot. These depictions of the rice are clear in the video of the experiment.
In the end, Dr. Emoto is pictured explaining that how we treat children is especially important. According to Emoto, we should take special care in how we interact with them and ensure that attention is given. He explained that indifference does the greatest amount of harm, as demonstrated by the third beaker of rice in the video. It’s amazing how the jar with positive words was still white and fresh, when in our reality we would at least believe that it would definitely start to go bad. Amazing! That’s the power of, positivity, at work.
How to find happiness, after a tough year, your circumstances could be bad. You could have gotten a divorce, you could have lost a job, you could have lost a loved one. Can you find, happiness, after a loss? In the, pursuit of happiness, guru's teach that, happiness, could only be found on the inside, so we can be happy regardless of losing a loved one, losing our job, a sickness, or divorce.
But the question is portable because we can add anything after the, How to find happiness, after….! We can add, How to find happiness, after my kids leave home, or, how to find happiness, after someone close to me dies, or, how to find happiness, after I lose my job etc..
We can substitute any phrase.
Happiness, comes from the inside.
The Pursuit of Happiness
Happiness, is the universal goal of everyone who has breathe.
Let’s look first at the relationship you have with yourself. Self-love is so important to, happiness.
You have to try very hard to love yourself. If you can't love yourself no one else can love you.
If you can't love yourself you can never be happy.
You can start by finding one thing about you, that you love.
God knew what he was doing when he created you. Everyone has at least one thing that makes them stand out.
Find it and give it love every time you look into the mirror.
And if there is something you can change, Change it. If you can't change it, find a different perspective on it and learn to love it.
You can change your weight, your hair color, your teeth, your wardrobe.
You can’t change your height, your skin color, your sex!
There is no sense whatsoever about being unhappy about something you can’t change about yourself or about something you can change; but won’t.
I just saw one of the most inspiring movies of the decade. Hidden Figures.
As a coach, this movie had so many nuggets.
1. The women were ambitious and they took control of their lives. They did not sit around and blame their skin color.
In one scene, one of the women was bitching that in order to get a promotion she had to upgrade her education.
The problem was that the only school she could do this at was an a white’s only school. So what did she do?
She petitioned the court to change the school to an integrated school. She researched and presented her case to the judge with such passion that the judge had no choice but to grant her the motion.
In another scene, IBM computers were going to make the woman computers obsolete, so the leader of the group took it on herself to learn how to program the computer. She had to steal the programming book from the white’s only library because the colored library had no such books! That is the, pursuit of happiness, working towards a goal.
There is always something you can do to improve your circumstance.
You are either part of the solution or you are part of the problem.
I covered the other 2 ways to find, happiness, in the video.
2. Your relationship with those closest to you.
3 And your relationship with God.
As you can see relationship is key!
We are social beings, we need connection, even if it is with one person.
I would like to end this post with this story.
I was searching the internet for a story on, Happiness, and I came across this movie called “Finding Happiness by Yogi Swami Kriyananda..“
Yogi Swami has Ananda colonies all over the world where people live in harmony and higher consciousness in nature.
Ananda means true joy is within.
Yogi Swami choose to build his colonies in nature because being in the presence of beauty is important to uplifting consciousness.
As you all know the East teaches the importance of meditation.
Meditation allows you to find your sense of security inside, it allows you to find your sense of self inside and when you find these things inside of you, you can never lose it because no one can ever take it away.
The Ananda colonies teaches that if you live to be happy, you will find things that make you happy and the number one thing that makes us happy is selfless service to others.
I also added a bonus audio on “How to control your thoughts”
As you know that, happiness, comes not from what people do to you or your circumstances but how you think about it.
So your internal dialog and your thoughts must be controlled and channeled into positivity and gratitude for you to find, happiness.
I urge you to find all the things that make you happy, and do them.
Find the things that make you happy, make it a necessity to be in nature at least once per week!
I guarantee..
You will not only find, happiness, but you find your bliss!
Namaste
Millennials, need parents teaches or coaches to stimulate their, personal development. Millennials, need to understand that, personal development, comes when they anticipate the very next phase beyond the one there're in, so they can be prepared for it when it arrives.
Introduction to, Personal Development for, Millennials
Today what we want to focus on is giving, Millennials, some clarity on, personal growth and development. We both know that learning should not stop when we leave school. My guest today is Arika Pierce author of the book The Millennial's Playbook to Adulting.
Myrna – What advice would you give, Millennials, on, personal growth? Millennials, are in the growth stage of life, what advice would you give them? I know in your book you give ten tips. We don't have time to talk on all ten, personal development, tips; but pick some of the top ones and share how you would advise, Millennials, on, personal growth and development.
Arika- I think especially after you get out of school, Millennials, are sort of over trying to learn from textbooks. People are just exhausted from that textbook and learning from your professors and things like that; So I do encourage, Millennials, to become students of life.
By that I mean opening your eyes to all the things that you can learn from different people, new experiences just being open to continuing to stretch your horizon and to be multifaceted and to be just a well-rounded person. In my book, for example:
I suggest things such as reading biographies about people that you're curious about for, personal development, or maybe who you want to know. Learn more about their path.
I also believe that you should do things like watch documentaries on Netflix about different types of topics that you might be interested in or just want to know more about.
I also think listening to podcasts that's huge for, personal development, and that's why I love your podcast. I listen to podcast really throughout my day on various types of topics, it could be something around, personal development, by expanding your mindset, it could be something around the news, it could be anything. There's so much out there that you can really stretch your mind and learn.
Going to different types of events. I always tell people if you get invited, go to something and especially if it's something that you probably would be interested in doing. Go to the Opera, go to a hockey game even though you don't know what's going on, go to a book talk, go to a wine tasting, whatever it is just expand your horizon and, personal development.
Learning does not stop once you walk across the stage. You should always every day be learning more about yourself, about life, about other people, just always be curious and be a student of the world and of life.
Myrna – Awesome, that's some good advice I love the podcast one because that's a big one. I actually showed my mom just yesterday how to put podcasts on her phone.
That's the space that we're in right now. I will tell you I started listening to podcast just to learn what some of the successful podcasters are doing. If there's something you want to learn, you go to an event, you go to book signing. That's why people write books. You can take ten years to learn something or you can take ten minutes to read how someone else did it in a book, and that's the purpose of books.
I wanted to learn how to be better at what I do, so I started listening to podcast. You would not believe how my mind has been expanded. I subscribe to TuneIn radio, so that I can research how that works and what Hot Talk radio was all about. I happened to come across the Hay House World Summit podcast and you would not believe what I've been learning.
I listen to podcasts every morning when I walk. I walk for an hour every day, so I that's my learning time and I my eyes are wide open because this podcast have guest speakers all the top people in the spirituality and consciousness and health space.
I try to bring good content on this show so that people can plug in and hear something inspiring and mindset shifting. This podcast is not all about shooting the breeze. I went through your book and I made a note of some of the things that you mentioned and I'll mention a couple of them because it's very important you talked about:
How Millennials can Shift their mindset for, personal development
• Keeping your mind healthy. You start off by talking about depression. Depression is very big right now. I don't know where it's coming from, but a lot of people are depressed, even the ones that you think should be happy, that has a lot of money. Still trouble with depression. You start out by saying, keep your mind healthy and that's very important when you talk about staying motivated.
• Find a healthy outlet. Journaling, painting, baking, etc and stuff like that that keeps your mind healthy. I talked about journaling, I think it's great but it's not for everybody. I think you know it's not something some people can do it every single day, some people just do it on a periodic basis. I believe don't be hard on yourself about doing it, but if sometimes you need a place to get your thoughts get your feelings out thinking on paper can honestly be a great way to do that.
• Getting into healthy routines. I just wrote a blog that's coming out next week about a morning routine. I think establishing a morning routine is a great, personal development, tool and can help you set the intention and tone for the rest of your day and so actually think sitting down and thinking about what you want your routine to be and doing it that could be transformative. I've just recently sort of created a new morning routine and it really has changed my mindset for the whole day. Just making sure there are these five or six things that I do before I start my day.
That's awesome, you know again as you talk my mind goes to certain things and I was just listening to a podcast where Barbara Corrigan was speaking and we all know her from Shark Tank. She has done a lot for herself, she said something that I did as a little variation for what you just said. She said write down the things that you like to do and write down the things you don't like to do and instead of trying to do the things you don't like to do, and then find an assistant or an intern and delegate the things you don’t like to do.
If you're still trying to just figure out what direction you want to go in life, I think that's a great time to get it to get a, Life coach. Honestly I think the hardest part is just identifying what exactly you need the, Life coach, for sometimes you want the, Life coach, to help you with your, personal development plan, in terms of where you want to take your career.
Sometimes it could be helping you balance your work versus your personal life. You might need a, Life coach just in terms of helping you get to the next level of your dreams and, self improvement. There's all different types of ways you can leverage and use a, Life coach. I really think that it's never too soon to do that.
Today, there's lots of, Life coaches who focus on the, millennial, generation, which I think is great. I think those people really understand what the, millennials, are going through and can really help them work through all of those challenges. I wasn't focused on the, millennial, generation until I recognized that my daughter being a, millennial, and her struggles and the things that she needs help with and then I put them two and two together.
I thought what there's lots of people in that bucket that could do maybe good guidance and direction. Yeah so you're right, I haven't come across a lot of, millennial, coaches; but I know that, Millennials, are the generation that's moving the bucket in a lot of areas. That’s because they're a large group, they're the movers and the shakers.
So as we continue our discussion on, personal development, as a, millennial, I want to ask this question. In your book Arika, you give advice on how to care for your body so how can we incorporate caring for your body with, personal growth and development?
I believe that when you work on your mind, when you strengthen your mind, a lot of that has to also be your body and soul, they're all connected. When you are taking care of yourself when you're eating right, when you're exercising, I believe your mind is just in a different place. You feel those endorphins, everything is flowing. I had a workout this morning where I came up with three different things while I was working out that I wanted to incorporate.
When you feel good you just can really, transform your mindset, in a very positive way. I believe that when you are you believe that you're invincible, and start taking care of yourself, eating right, making sure you're drinking enough water, making sure that you know you're working out on a regular basis, making sure you're meditating, when all of those are aligned I believe that your life in terms of what you want to do, in terms of having the energy to do them, all falls into a, personal development plan. You get into the, personal growth and development, space. But you can't take your body for granted, because we actually only get one and you know if your body isn't right usually everything else isn't right either.
That's awesome, I was listening I was listening to Louise Hay, she was talking about something that she calls the mirror work. She says is that women especially should go in front of the
mirror every day when they wake up, when they look their worst and they should say to themselves, “ I love you, you are so awesome.” I have no problem with self-love, I love myself, but I still do it every morning. I look myself in the eye and I say “I love you you're awesome.” What she's trying to do with that little exercise is bring exactly what you're talking about the mind-body connection. Millennials, have a problem with self love.
Millennials, and Self Love
When you love the body that you're in, when you love you, then it transcends into every area of your life, it transcends into your, self confidence, it transcends into what you put in your body, how you treat it, how you let people treat you. There's definitely a correlation with exercise into listening and connecting to your higher self. I wrote my entire first book and it was called ironically “Becoming Conscious, my Awakening” be connecting with my higher self.
I would go for run in the morning and all the words would come to me. I would go to the car right after and start writing. I will tell you if I tried if I tried to circumvent and write at night or something it wouldn't go as smooth, because then I'll be trying to force it, but when it just comes to me it came to me when I was running, the words just flowed.
Like when you were exercising this morning. So the mind-body connection is very important, and that's why I decided to include it in our topic today, because a lot of people do not care for their body and especially when they're young, millennials, and they don't have any aches and pains, they kind of ignore it.
I was listening to another podcast just yesterday again on the Hay House World Summit and listened to Ocean Robbins, I love his name, I told my daughter she has to name my grandchild Ocean. He is actually is the grandson of Baskin Robbins and he had an incredible story about how his grandfather ate ice cream all day long, he had at least 21 flavors in his fridge at all times.
He ate ice cream for breakfast and lunch! When he got to 70 years old, he had all these health problems because of the diet that he had all his life. He had heart problems but his story ended well, because started eating well, he started doing certain things, eating well, including cutting out ice cream and he was still able to turn it around. That's not an encouragement for anybody listening to wait until they're in their 70’s and in poor health to get started on a, personal development plan, for a healthy lifestyle, but do it now.
How, Millennials, develop a, Personal Development Plan: Jim Rohn
Most, Millennials, are in school, I think a lot of, Millennials, go on to higher education. They're working on feeding their mind and, personal growth, education and career and things like that. The reason I talked about, personal growth, because as a, Life coach, I know that there's a difference. Jim Rohn's personal development growth plan, is a popular, personal development plan. Tony Robbins talks about Jim Rohn's growth plan in his back story. I would like to hear your spin on the difference between studying for a career and actually, personal growth.
Arika – When we think about, personal growth and development, as you just said that that's very connected to what you are focused on career-wise, your job. I think when you start to think about what you want to personally achieve for yourself, that may or may not be connected to your professional life, because there definitely is some overlap between the two.
I think really people just have to always think about looking inside and how do they define themselves, outside of their career. Millennials, you're thinking about how you want to define yourself as a person and defining yourself as a person is not just what your career is and so it's very easy to get into a life pattern. You only focus and your own the only thing that you know to that you gravitate to in terms of your growth, in terms of your brand.
When you ask “What is your, personal development plan” which is now something I heard from Brian Tracy he talks about you know spending all his money when he was a youngster to purchase something that called a, personal growth, plan. If I was to ask a, Millennial, they might answer in terms of there career trajectory. But that is not a, personal development, plan because it's only it is only touching on one area of a multi-faceted spiritual being.
Deepak Chopra is one of the people that I follow and I love, he talks about asking “who are you?” who is the person that's doing the listening right now? You ask yourself these questions “Who am I?” “What am I here to do?” You just ask God that question and even let God answer. Your, personal development plan links up to your purpose.
Learn different ways you can develop your, personal development, business, organization and, personal growth, skills.
Strategies for, personal development, can be found on the Transform Your Mind Podcast.
